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ameerproblems · 4 years
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A Two Way Street
#AmeerProblems : I have plenty of friends that ride on my Facebook and are constantly mentioning watching for motorcycles and sharing the road. Which I respect and have always made an effort to do, regardless of posts... However, it’d be nice if more riders were safe and respectful in return.
This morning I headed out to run some errands. I get to a spot in my route where I have a left turn to make with a car in front of me and motorcycle behind me. I follow the car into the right lane and of course the bike goes into the left lane. I quickly realize that the car in front of me is going slow.  I had plenty of room to get over but I know the motorcycle can and most likely will accelerate past me, so I decide to be polite and wait.
Just as I suspected he quickly past me and the car in front of me was still under the speed limit. As soon as he was past me, I signaled and hopped over... I see him look in his mirror and then SLAM on his breaks to match speed with the car next to him. We all know that even a little tap from me would’ve sent him sliding across the pavement and of course he had on NO protective gear, so he would’ve incurred max damage. Luckily I just redid my brakes, so I was able to respond accordingly.
He stayed that way the rest of the block until the light ahead of us turned yellow and then he punched it and went FLYING through the intersection and up the street. It’s a quick light, but he was still long gone and the cars that were in front of him were still at the next light... It seems that more and more I’m encountering riders like this... I’m thinking I’ll probably maintain my safe driving, but let the chips fall where they may. I hope you don’t run into me. You be safe, I’ll be safe.
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ameerproblems · 4 years
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Winding down after a crazy day in the classroom... I need a nap. #chiefsonesie #ameerproblems https://www.instagram.com/p/B8AC6A0pn-U/?igshid=zx3s4mzw6kzq
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ameerproblems · 4 years
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Amateur Hour
i#AmeerProblems : I really appreciate the professionalism of my buddies... especially when I run across their contemporaries that are definitely in the wrong line of work. This time I’m talking bounty hunters. Ryan this is for you! 
So Friday night these two clowns come in from the back lot. They sit at the bar near me and one of them (clearly the Alpha) starts chatting up the bartender. At first he’s acting as if they’ve misplaced a drunk buddy of theirs, so he gives a vague description of a guy: “really drunk, tall, white guy with tattoos”...
This is a bar on the edge of hipsterville... That description is quickly laughed at and dismissed... I guess he thinks there’s some intent there because he switches modes and all the sudden he’s telling the bartender that she looks familiar. They order a couple of beers and the Alpha sucks his down pretty quick while he’s “making conversation” with the bartender. As the conversation progresses he gets the bartenders full name and I have red flags going off. 
This guy really couldn’t make up his mind on a technique to use because now he’s asking about his missing buddy by name. This is a perfect example of persistence not paying off and deception being the wrong course of action. The guy he’s looking for HAD been in the bar about 20 min prior, but nobody was really feeling like sharing that information with him at this point.  I guess he got frustrated with not getting any results still because he started talking about how “bad” his buddy was and all the negative things he’d been doing. 
Bartender: “That sounds like a terrible guy... I hope he doesn’t come here”
Here’s were his amateur foolishness really shines... He starts discussing his “take down” plan, which I guess involved a taser because he triggers his taser... in a crowded midtown bar... At first I just stared at him in disbelief... As soon as I was able to speak, I told him to take his little toy back to the car.
Alpha: I don’t have a car here...*entered the building through the PARKING LOT entrance*
Not sure what facial expression I gave him, but he wisely changed his tune to “we’re about to leave anyways.” That’s when he got a phone call that answered some questions..
Alpha: Where are you?? We’re here...
Alpha: You’re where?”... and you have eyes on him. Why did’t you say something when you left here?
So now I have the picture... This is a 3 man bounty hunter team... The third guy is tailing their target, but he sucks as much as these two. It’s not hard to message or call to say “We’re on the move”, but these guys aren’t even bright enough for that. So now these two are sitting here bugging us, while their target is down the street getting food at a restaurant. I hope that he finished up at that place before they arrived and they had to keep following him around.
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ameerproblems · 4 years
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Favorite Son
#AmeerProblems : I was in desperate need of a nap earlier before work, so I wasn’t able to provide closure to my “moving tale”. So I’ll do that before I add the bar stories I have. 
First things first.. For the past 20 years, I’ve worked in the service here in town without fail. My family knows this... So for my Dad to text me at 11:30 pm on Friday night to ask for my assistance with his moving project... smh... I have a brother and two brother in laws that have nice relaxing weekends.
Dad: (11:30 pm) Can you help me move some boxes and a table Saturday morning? 
Me: *no hesitation* What time? 
Dad: 9 am
So of course I was there at 9 am to help him... and SEVEN... SEEEVEEEN hours later, and 9000 some odd steps, I finally had to take my leave because I had a prior engagement in Blue Springs that was time sensitive.
To REALLY drive home the... uniqueness of my Dad... He’s moving to a whole other state... Part of our journey today involved us picking up a U-Haul, which I thought he was going to use to transport his belongings to North Carolina.... Nope... We loaded up the U-haul with items to donate, items to drop off at his office (he’s keeping an office here in town), and the items he wanted in N.C. we took to a Fed Ex store... To be shipped... Seven boxes, two plastic totes with lids, and two plastic totes without lids... Just tape over the top of them.
Me; Hey Dad... Are these plastic ones going to?
Dad: Yeah
Me: I don’t think they’ll ship those like this.
Dad: We’ll find out.
And I was right... They weren’t going to ship those containers as is. So he agreed to have them unpack his plastic containers and pay them to repack everything. Then he thought of some more items he would also like to ship down, so we loaded up more stuff to drop off and pay them to box up. When it was all said and done he shipped down 15-20 large boxes, to his new wife’s home in Virginia... for a couple of weeks... Before he has them shipped to their new permanent home in NC... and poor little old me is just along for the ride, watching him do allll this stuff that logically makes no sense to me... especially with only an hour and a half of sleep under my belt... and my notion of “sure, I’ll help my Dad for an hour or so” slowly evaporated
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ameerproblems · 4 years
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That’s What  I Call Gold! Pt. 2
#AmeerProblems : The Middle (cont.): So the last part of our tale had the girlfriend fleeing out the back door. As I’m sitting there, I see girlfriend pass by the front window... Bye bye... Nope... She’s not done... She turns around and comes back inside  to hurl a cellphone at him (the pieces go everywhere), then goes outside... Comes back... Throws a pack of cigarettes at him... Then a drink... and NOW she’s done... but he’s not.
The End: At one point during their conversation I gleaned a little info nugget that he had no money on him. So after she was gone I made sure to tell the server, owners, and GM that payment for their order was now in question. Of course the server got confirmation on that. We had him hand over part of his phone as collateral, and I found the rest of the phone shortly after. Before I found his phone he began to use an off duty servers phone to contact his sister to have her bring him money, so I decided to keep his working phone in our custody.
 Of COURSE he started chatting up the servers, blaming the one with big tits for making his girlfriend jealous. In my opinion though, it was actually server #2 that pissed her off because she was acting suuuper familiar with them... but he was the only one eating up all the attention. At one point he questioned me on why I didn’t help him. I just stared before going back to my Sudoku. For awhile the server that was letting him use her phone  was sitting at the table with him
Me: *he’s going to offer her a drink*
He started offering to buy her drinks with nonexistent money... *deadpan*... she walked away. He starts to wander a bit...Sister was being responsive and was coming with money...
Me: *He’s going to try and order drinks from the bar*
Sure enough he does... Struggles to figure out why we won’t serve him more... Now he’s back at the table talking with a couple of servers. Starts offering Meth as a form of payment... Meth... in exchange... for liquor...  Big check in the drug dealer box! Ha... I’m too good...
He bounces around from table to table at this point, getting in everybody’s personal and shifting between overly jovial to aggressively friendly/pushy. He’s definitely wearing out his welcome. Luckily after a little more time I have to follow him outside to meet his sister. She left her FOH serving job down the street to bring him his money. He makes sure that I know the big ass truck on lifts she’s driving is his (Of course... he’s short!) before sister gets out of the truck and hands him a huge wad of hundreds (smh... stereotype so hard). 
So now I walk him back inside and get him to pay his $30 tab, even that’s a struggle... Then he wants the server who let him use her phone because he’d told her he’d pay her $100. She was trying to hide from him but i knew his dumb ass was actually going to pay her that, so I made her come over while I was babysitting his ass. So he hands her a $100... Then the other server that had been hanging around his table all night came up. He gave her $100 just because, and she made sure to exchange phone numbers with him *deadpan*... Lastly, he handed me a $20 for taking care of him... Not surprising... Mr. Big Spender here... smh... After a little more babysitting and “no you can’t have any more to drink”, with some “look, your sister is trying to leave”, i finally got him to go... smh
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ameerproblems · 4 years
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That’s What I Call GOLD! Pt. 1
#AmeerProblems : I’m either psychic or way too good at reading people. A couple came through and nothing that happened after that was a surprise.
The beginning of our adventure: Couple walks in and I approach them for an ID check. Short Mexican guy and a white chick... The chick looks to the guy and he insists that I give him a high five...*deadpan*... He’s really feeling himself already, Uh oh... So after the half assed high five, I ask for IDs again... He pulls out her clutch and says he left his ID somewhere. I stare, he stares, they leave. I guess he said he left it in the car because they come right back in.
So based off of that exchange these were my determinations: This little cocky prick is a drug dealer from Mexico that finds status in having a little white girl as his girlfriend... but he bases his human interaction off of what he’s seen in movie and TV shows from the States. So he’s going to be annoyingly “American” and talk a lot of junk about stuff, he’s going to be really aggressively amorous with females that aren’t his girl and that’s going to piss her off. They’re going to get into a fight or argument and leave here angrily. I’m probably going to have to help him.
The middle: So now they’re sitting at a table next to me and the guy is being very loud about how much tacos cost down in Texas and having an unnecessary one sided debate with his server with big boobs. At one point during his debate he insists on showing her something on her phone. *deadpan* So now he’s looking up some sort of bean dish on her phone, in my head I’m thinking “this dude has already messaged himself and stalked her FB. Eventually the server is able to tear herself away to get their drinks and try to work. Frustratingly, there’s another server that keeps approaching the table to socialize as well. So now there are two potential triggers. It doesn’t take long... They take their shot of tequila and a sip or two of their Long Islands and exchange a some words. Then boom the girlfriend darts to the bathroom...hmm... Then she comes back to the table for a second, they exchange more words... She darts outside, he darts after her... They come back in, she’s clearly upset and he’s laughing. They exchange more words... She darts to the bathroom, comes back and sits down, gets up and walks back towards the bathroom, walks past the bathroom and out the backdoor. (to be continued)
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ameerproblems · 5 years
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Look Before You Leap!
#AmeerProblems : So I’m helping out at Kelly’s on St. Pat all day long, so taking a lunch is required. On the WAY to getting a lunch, I ran into a couple of issues... because that’s what I do. 
St. Pat Issue #1: So I stepped into the Mens Room to take a leak and wash my hands. As I step into the room there’s this little black kid fixing his bandanna/dread look in the mirror *shrug*. When I finish pissing he’s STILL in the mirror fixing this thing. So now we have a line for the sinks forming in this crowded ass bathroom because only one sink is accessible... Smh... C’mon Princess!
I wait a few more minutes to try and avoid a scene but he just keeeps tying and untying this thing. So I finally say something.
Me : Ok guy... that’s enough with the hair. There’s a line for the sink forming.
Princess: I’m fixing my hair!
Me: I see that... but you were doing that when I got in here... and you’re still doing it.
Princess: So!... There’s another sink.
Me:: There’s 4 people in line... It’s time for you to be done. 
Princess: Just step in front of me.
Me (now I’m annoyed): Where?? Your dick is touching the sink!
Princess: I don’t care.
Me: Well I do... so you can either step back or I can put you out.
Now... for some reason he scoots over to his left and washes his hands in that sink... So I step forward and wash my hands on his right. THAT’S when he sort of glances over and notices the “Security” shirt I’m wearing. FINALLY!...smh... He does a liitle more shit talking, but then...
Princess: It’s all good... I was just playing.
Me: I’m not (still calming washing my hands)... You were just VEERY loud and disrespectful in a public setting. There will be a consequence.
Princess: Man... You tripping...
Me: Naaah... I’ll walk you out in a second.
Random Guy: and I’ll help.
As I’m walking him out he gives me one “Hey don’t touch me!”, but after that he moves with a quicker step to his buddies to tell them to close their tabs. Then we all walk over to the gate. THAAT’S when he chooses to start apologizing profusely and trying to explain that he thought I was just some guy talking shit. I had to point out that the only person talking shit throughout the whole exchange was him. Of course I kept it polite, professional, and wished him a better day somewhere else... but I was still trying to get my lunch... Peace brotha! 
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ameerproblems · 5 years
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Where Are My Wings??
#AmeerProblems : Say hi to “Chad”... Chad reminds me of my Navy Seal buddy... In his 30s-40s, you can tell he was military but clearly retired... Big guy, TERRIBLE drinker. When Chad showed up the other night, he didn’t seem too bad off...That changed before the night ended though. At about 2 am Chad was out front on the patio, clearly over his limit... So the server gave him a cup of water... Which he proceeded to slap onto the ground. After that he became my problem.
Initially Chad was quite compliant, he got up and exited the patio just based off of verbal cues. He was super unsteady on his feet and kept trying to hold on to me. Trying to support a drunk person is ALWAYS a bad idea, but especially when the drunk person is your height and heavier. i warned Chad that I wasn’t going to hold him up if he fell and then I pulled a chair off of the patio to have him sit in.
Chad was sooo out of it he was all over the place... At times he was compliant and sitting, then he’d be stumbling around and grabbing a hold of anything to hold himself up. You couldn’t understand ANYTHING he was saying most of the time, but occasionally he would get a real angry look on his face and tense up his muscles. I really focused on keeping him calm and away from other patrons. 
I knew I didn’t want him driving anywhere, so I called for a cab and waited with him until we were closed. I had a few cabs drive past, but no one stopped. The messaging app never updated... No cabbie ever called me...Once we were closed I did my closing duties and eventually went out front to check on Chad. He was still there, but instead of being in the chair he was laying in the street (see picture), and it had started to rain. So now I decided to get his phone out of his pocket and try to call anybody that might care enough to come get him. 
While I had his phone he bounced back and forth between calling me an Angel and angrily demanding his phone back. After about 5 call I finally reached his sister and explained to her the situation. She was super apologetic and said she would come get him, but it would take awhile since she lived up North. I went ahead and put Chad back on the patio and out of the rain. For the most part he stayed put, just tried to wander off a few times. After about 45 min of watching and waiting a car pulls up and Chad’s PARENTS pull up and load him in the car.
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ameerproblems · 5 years
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Welp... Can’t Unsee That
#AmeerProblems : Seriously... Why are my friends like this?? Seriously!... I have tons of industry friends... and they are actual friends, so I’m constantly being introduced to their flavors of the month. Normally I don’t mind but this was a special case. 
A short time ago I get a “you working tonight” message from a lady friend of mines. i tell her yes and she says she’ll be coming to visit that night. Now this particular friend is one that I have across multiple social media platforms, so I get exposed to quite  a bit of what she has going on. With that being said...
Later that night my lady friend did in fact come through... and she brought her current guy friend along... Again... NORMALLY not  a probem... buuut this time I had veeery recently seen a Snapchat of hers with this dude strapped to a bed with a ball gag in his mouth... while she sat on the bed smoking... NOW... I am NOT kink shaming at all... Do what you do in the PRIVACY of your own home... PRIVACY being the key word.
I couldn’t be around him/them like I hadn’t JUST seen that shit. I greeted them at the door and walked them inside. After that I just focused on working and let them have their space. Normally I would’ve chatted with her and shared a drink/shot with the two of them... but I felt the words “ball” and “gag” on the tip of my tongue... Couldn’t risk “Cheers Ball Gag” being the toast I made...lol
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ameerproblems · 5 years
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Bro... That’s Gross
#AmeerProblems : Some of my guys just have no hope or boundaries... One of said guys I’ve known through the industry for 10-12 years. He’s a fun, crazy character that I truly call a friend and he’s waiting to read this post... sadly he doesn’t know the topic yet, which speaks volumes to how much shit he gets into... Yet... These are my friends and this is my life.
So a few weeks back he was hanging at the bar having drinks and being his usual extroverted self. There was also a female present that we both had known for awhile, but neither one of us can really stand her. She would NOT shut up and was constantly talking about how she used to give my guy rides home back in the day. Every time she would wander off my guy would clown her pretty good.
Fast forward another week or two... My guy comes in for another visit. We greet each other like we always do... and then he INSTANTLY brings up his last visit and the chick. I told him I remembered the night... and now I’ll never be able to forget it.
My Guy: Yeah... I went to that bitches house that night and tried to fuck.
Me: What??.... Broooo.... Why??
My Guy: Right... she’s not even my type... you know me.
Me: Right! I do know you... and she is NOT your type.
My Guy: My dick couldn’t even get hard looking at her flabby, pasty, white ass... I just went home and jacked off.
Me: Walk away...
lol... I laughed with him, but I was crying on the inside... I need the Men In Black to come get that image out of my head.
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ameerproblems · 6 years
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Theft of Service
#AmeerProblems : There MUST have been a full moon last night... because the randomness of the choices made can’t be explained in any other way... So lets start with events #1 and #2... 
I’m down on the club side of things last night, when I get a radio call to come to the bar side. So I get to the bar side and there are two white gentleman standing at the door. One in his late 30s... The other in his 50s or 60s... Once I arrive the younger guy starts complaining about feeling like he’s being taken advantage of...???.... and how the older gentleman was a “fake Uber” trying to get money from him. He’s definitely drunk and not explaining himself well. 
So I look to the older gentleman who explains that he is a cabbie in KS and was at some bar over in KS when the Younger was kicked out by staff. The staff wanted him gone, so he stepped in and drove him. I’m listening to both of these guys... I’m looking around... and I realize that there’s no cab, just a black station wagon looking thing sitting in the street. 
Me: So wait... Are you a cabbie or are you an Uber driver?
Cabbie: I’m a cabbie...
Me : So you do Uber on the side??
Cabbie: No...
Me: Ummmm....
Drunkie: You guys have an ATM?
Me:Yeah... You want to pay him?
Drunkie: Yeah...
Me: Ok....(to my guy) take him to the ATM.
Me: Now... you know that you have NO legal standing to get money from him right? So if he doesn’t come out and pay you, that’s his choice.
Cabbie: What are you talking about?? That’s theft of service!
Me:... but you’re not working right now. You are basically a Good Samaritan that gave a guy a ride at this point.
Cabbie: What do you mean I’m not working?! I drove him here!
Me: Riiight... In YOUR PERSONAL CAR, not your CAB. You’re not at work.
Cabbie: What?... That’s crazy... What he’s doing is the same as walking into a convenience store, reaching across to open the register, and taking cash out.
Me:...WHAT??... Not even close... If anything YOU stole a fare from a cabbie that’s actually WORKING right now and could’ve transported him.
Cabbie: Whatever... When he comes out, let him know I’m in my car... WORKING.
Me:... Calling it “working “ doesn’t make it true!
Now... As SOON as he goes back to his car, i get a call over the radio to report to the ATM... smh... Oh boy... Let’s see... still not going to make Drunkie pay if he’s changed his mind. Crazily, it WASN’T Drunkie (he was waiting in line still), it was the gentleman in front of him. He’d been in there for awhile and now that it was time to settle up his card declined. Now THAT’S theft of service! 
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ameerproblems · 6 years
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Wait... We’re NOT... THAT Cool
#AmeerProblems : For future reference ladies and gents... If I NEVER use your name when I see you... I don’t know/remember it. So just because you use my name, doesn’t make us friends... Don’t get me wrong... I appreciate the love, just make sure you stay in your lane though. 
Perfect example... This past weekend we had a regular that I had to check suuper hard. He’s been coming around for a while now. Not a big drinker, but I suspect that he was crushing on a couple of my bartenders pretty hard. The bartenders are now gone, but I’m assuming he’s gotten extra comfortable in the space. I could probably take a good guess at his name now, but that’s only because he’s on the ex-bartenders’s Facebooks and likes to comment frequently on their posts. 
Addendum: He might go by a middle name on Social media... I don’t believe that’s the name on his ID... Either way, I have no clue what to actually call him. 
Overall, the current staff likes him, but find his expectation of “the hook up” all the time to be slightly annoying. Not because he won’t pay, but because he gives this flabbergasted look BEFORE he pays when we ask him to pay. Personally my only issue with him up until this point is that occasionally I’ve had to check him from being on the employee side of the bar. Once or twice he’s gone so far as to fill a  cup from the soda gun at the very end of the bar. Definitely not ok, but my reprimands have been quite gentle (I actually laughed/smiled)... up until now...
So recently we were SLAMMED!... It was hot, we were running out of stuff, and I was rushing around like crazy... Tons of people flagging me down and trying to ask for stuff. I was definitely getting perturbed... but I was rolling with it. I’d already had one regular (and actual valued acquaintance) get reprimanded because he felt the need to come talk to the bartender while she was at the POS computer. 
Now it’s about 10 minutes later and I’m refilling ice wells. On one of my return trips from the back room with a bucket of ice...  I run RIGHT into the Mystery Regular ALLL the way behind the bar. Not only is he behind the bar again... but this time he’s felt the need to come directly to the middle bartender, not just mess with things on the end... and this is a good sized bar with plenty of space between stations. 
At this point I just snap... I slip into Dad Mode and just start escorting him out from behind the bar as I’m going off. The music is loud but just from looking at their faces you can tell that everybody standing at the bar can definitely hear me. Just before we get to the end of the bar he just stops and gives me this hurt look... and then in a very upset tone hits me with: “For real?... It’s like that??... It’s me?...”
Now... I could’ve easily pointed out that I actually didn’t know him or know his name, but that would’ve been too mean. I just left it at “NO ONE is allowed behind the bar. Period. Since then he has definitely towed the line.
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ameerproblems · 6 years
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If You Have a Problem... The DJ Will Solve It...??
#AmeerProblems : I wiiiill NEVER understand the White Tee to the club thing... Put some effort into your fashion choice people... The most annoying part of the White Tee scenario is that there will be one, maaaybe two, individual(s) in a group wearing the White Tee. Everyone else will be dressed in ANNYTHING else, but try to defend their friend’s fashion choice... Even more than the friend wearing the shirt at times.  
So last weekend I had to deal with the White Tee scenario both Friday and Saturday. Night one:
Loud Mouth: Man, we’re with DJ ****** and ******... Go ask them if it’s cool.
Me: They’re not even here yet.
Loud Mouth: Man whatever... It’s their party.
Me: I know who’s party it is... they’re not here. You can call them.
Loud Mouth: You call them!
Me: No thanks.
Group angrily departs.
Second night:
I’m standing out front with my guy when a young lady walks up and inquires about dress code. I start giving her our list and as SOON as I say White Tee, she turns and walks off. Ok... That was the response she was looking for. Last glance I had of her was being across the street with a group of friends (one in a white tee). *shrug*... I go on about my business and a few minutes later my guy calls me back to the door. As soon as I get to the door, I find the initial female standing there with about 8 other people (White Tee waaay in the back). Then this other chick shoves her phone at me. I look at my guy and he shrugs...I look back to the chick and she says “it’s the dj!”... I look at the screen, and sure enough there’s the DJs name. I attempt to talk to the DJ but the connection is no good, so eventually I hand her back her phone. 
Remember... I haven’t talked to anyone since the initial question was asked. So after I give the phone back I ask “what’s the problem?... Why am I talking to the dj?? The response - there’s no problem... Ok... Oh ok... “IDs please. Now just so you know, there’s no white tees inside and there’s nothing DJ can do about that. So now the whooole group is in an tizzy. You all KNEW the dress code and already CONFIRMED what it was. Just because your stubborn and want your way, doesn’t mean I’ll cave. Especially if your opening move is to attempt to go over my head. I’m going to check that shit REAL hard. 
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ameerproblems · 6 years
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You’re On a Date W/ K***?!
#AmeerProblems : So somewhere in the chasm of about 30 stories I’ve started and left unfinished is the story of K***.... Or as I often refer to him FUCKING K***... A very well meaning... yet socially awkward and inept regular... Imagine Carlton Banks with TOO MUCH personality and outside of his element. So last weekend when I arrive to the bar there’s a couple struggling to figure out where to place their vehicle and therefore in my way... I couldn’t even get bothered though because my brain was stuck on “Did K*** just get out of a car?... Was that a lady that just got back in the car??... She got back out???... Is she on a DATE with K***????”
After a brief moment to collect myself I stepped inside the bar and found K*** and the lady sitting on stools back in the pool room looking at food menus. Still looked like a date... Weird.. As I turn to leave the room they choose a meal and K*** heads to place the order. Ooook... After I finished my lap I go sit out by the door and give the situation no further thought. This is the problem with K***... I guess he never want back to her after he put in the food order...??... So when they try to give her the food, she says it’s up to K*** to pay and she doesn’t want the food/want to stay. 
Now things are nice and awkward because she decides to head to her car with a server (carrying the food) and gm right behind her. 
GM: “Have you seen K***?”
Me: “Not for about 45 min (when he was in the pool room)” 
GM: “Well THEY ordered food and she says she’s not paying for it.” 
(That’s what you get for going a date with K***!)
So now she’s in the car... everyone is standing around... and I’m just helping the DJ get situated to get loaded into the club. What happens? K*** comes walking out of the bar like it was no big deal.
K***: “Why didn’t you call or text me?”
Chick: “I didn’t know where you went. I thought you had ditched me.”
Blah, blah, blah... and then they head back inside together... Bruuuh.... You just VANISHED for 45 min in a space that’s not that big or crowded. WTF
Me: THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR BEING ON A DATE WITH FUCKIN K***!!!
Needless to say K*** was back this weekend all by himself...
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ameerproblems · 6 years
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Party Bus Chronicles: IIII Know People!
#AmeerProblems : I feel like I should/do have more party bus stories... This story and the next both took place recently... This incident was before the pukers, the next story occurred afterwards.
This particular night I happened to arrive and find my buddy’s shuttle/party bus sitting outside with another buddy of mines behind the wheel. We chat for a bit and I find out he’s down there to meet a birthday party that had rented the bus out for a bit. I wished him luck and went on about my night. Maybe 15 min later I’m out back when a group walks up to the back door with coolers and cups. Since they CLEARLY looked party bus prepared I directed them around to the front where the bus was located. This was the FIRST incident between myself and the Birthday Girl that didn’t go her way.
Birthday Girl: We’re here to meet my party bus. He’s parked out front. We just want to walk through.
Me: Well your bus is actually on the side and it would be quicker to go THAT way...and those cups and coolers can NOT go this way. They have to go THAT way. 
She never really got the message, but others in her group understood, so they moved along. It wasn’t a long rental because they were back and inside the bar next door before too long. On one of my wanderings inside the bar I witnessed members of  the party heading to the back patio to relax outside. Perfectly acceptable... What caught my attention was when one member of the group started to insist to her girl and another group member that she COULDN’T go out on the back patio. Hmmmm.... So I go out back to talk to my guy working the door and describe this unique group member and he recalls instantly that she didn’t have an ID... hmmm.... As I’m talking to my guy the individuals that were talking inside come walking from around the corner (they’d gone out one of the other doors).
I decide to go check with my other guy to investigate things, but before I could fully walk away from the area the group in the parking lot decides to try joining  their friends sitting on the patio. Again my guy denies access... Then the birthday girl steps in and starts being abrasive and pushy, so I step in. They inform me that the ID was just left on the bus and the driver is on his way back with the ID. Sorry... we need to SEE the ID... Then they tell me that my guy working the front door saw the ID BEFORE they left on the party bus. Ok... I told them to wait while I go and confirm that... I tried to walk away but the Birthday Girl CONTINUED to talk down at my guy about these “facts”... I had to step back in and tell her to STOP TALKING or I wouldn’t go confirm anything... Again, her friends gave me apologetic looks and told her to stop as well.
Along with a confirmation from my guy working the front door, I went above and beyond to check in with my buddy that had driven them around. He quickly responded back and had NO clue about an ID and hadn’t talked to/told anyone he was returning to the bar with an ID... Oooh REEAALLY!?... So I go show the young lady that was missing the ID my text conversation with the driver and suggest that she retrace her steps so she can ACTUALLY find her ID (instead of lying to my face)...
And thus begins the final confrontation with the Birthday Girl that doesn’t go her way... So NOW the Birthday Girl is getting indignant OVER the lie... I don’t even use the word “lie”, I just continue to point out that the driver said he doesn’t have the ID. 
Birthday Girl: “Fuck this guy... We’ve spent $100 in here on shit and he wants to fuck with us... we’re never coming here again... we’re over here for lunch all the time... we work across the street... He says he talked to the driver... Yeah right... I’m calling the owner... We’ve spent $200 in here tonight and he’s tripping over some bullshit... blah, blah, blah... (More of the same)... We spent $500 in here and this nobody fucking dude is gonna trip with us and we’re here all the time...blah, blah, blah... (amazing... the amount kept rising)
So during all of her bitching and imaginary flexing (that I ignored), she DID actually put in a call to my buddy that owned the bus, who then called the driver. I was just observing everything because the young lady with no ID was out in the parking with a now former coworker, so I didn’t really care about the little bitch session. I had to step in one last time when the driver called my phone and wanted me to go find out EXACTLY  where the girl had been sitting because he was scouring the bus for the ID. I start walking over to the car when I encounter my coworker. I tell her what I’m headed to do and she informs me that the girl with no ID had told her that her ID was in her phone case... AT HOME. That made that whooole exchange so obnoxious. I didn’t who to be mad at more... I just took  deep breath, told my buddy the new intel so he could get on with his night, and went back to what I was working on beforehand. 
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ameerproblems · 6 years
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Bad Biz
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#AmeerProblems : I can DEF see why Stu doesn’t allow Party Buses showing up unscheduled at his spot. I’ve rarely finished with a party bus and thought “that was a pleasant ordeal.” This Saturday was nooo different. Had this party bus pull up and the owner decides to hop off and introduce himself/cut a deal. He walks up to greet my guy (the owner of the bus is a well known tattoo guy here in town) and hands me a business card. Soon he got on my bad side by trying to “help me” read the D.O.B.s on those altered military IDs. So I snapped on him. 
After we finally talked and established that he had 28 passengers, I offered him/agreed to his half off... It wasn’t until he mentioned $2.50 a piece that I realized he wasn’t understanding at all... So I walked him baby-step style through everything. We might have made it to person number six when we encountered our first minor “with no ID”... and it wasn’t looking like we’d even make it to the fourteenth free person, let alone fourteen paying customers. So I started charging. Got money out of maybe 5 people before running out of people of age/with IDs... Clearly (and sadly)... it was downhill from there.
Now I’m stuck with a birthday boy inside the club with some of his friends, a bus and sidewalk full of drunk minors, and no end in sight. I’m normally... polite when it comes to doing business... but I had no interest in being polite to this “owner” clown.So when he came back up to get my name and talk about doing business together, I flat out told him he didn’t need it. He looked taken aback of course, so I chose to clarify my stance. First, I drew his attention to the young man leaning against the bus behind him (Puker on the left iin the picture). I pointed out the fact that this particular young man was 18-19 yrs old and CLEARLY too drunk to even stand up. His response: “Oh really?... You think so? It’s in the contract 21+.”... I don’t think they took you seriously because they *pointing out the visible minors* are all minors.
Owner Clown swore he was going to do better and insisted we could do business... I gave my alias... HA.... After that he kept standing around passing his business card out to everybody walking past. I didn’t pay him much mind when he wasn’t talking to me because I had too many minors from his bus trying to sneak in to both business establishments. The only time I initiated conversation with him was when the really drunk kid hopped off the bus and puked for the FIRST (of maaany) times. 
Owner Clown : Oh yeah... it’s in my contract... $100 fine for puking inside.
SHUUDDUP about your contract!
The woorst part was closer to the end... Puker #1 has puked numerous times at this point... The riders are continuously getting on and off the bus... As I’m standing there observing everything I catch sight of a young man involved in a group conversation right at the bottom of the bus stairs. He’s another 18-19 yr old... I’ve been seeing him with drinks throughout their visit with us. What really concerned me about him was the fact that he was standing there in sweat pants... sagged to the point that his “WAIST” was around his knees... and “tucked” into his “waistband” was a handgun... W...t...f....  I had never seen that gun there before... So that means he was keeping it on the party bus... and since there was NOO drama going on... The only reason for the gun at this time was just to show it off... Can you guys leave anytime soon??
I was relieved when the group started gathering their members so they could depart...  The picture above was taken during the departing phase... No... They’re NOT pissing... People standing nearby thought they were. That’s just two kids who can’t handle their liquor and need to puke... again... Right before the bus pulled away my final glimpse of the bullshit was of Owner Clown leaning against the dash, taking a fifth straight to the face as his driver pulled into traffic... smh... Businessman of the year!!
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ameerproblems · 6 years
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Finally!... A First!?
#AmeerProblems : It’s been a long time since I’ve encountered a new trick from minors trying to get in the club/bar. It easily failed still, but it was refreshing to see something new. Had a group of four guys come up to the door lastnight. Two showed state ids and went inside; however, my guy paused on number three and after awhile he passes me a military id that is sliightly scratched up... buut the most significant scratch is the obliteration of the final digit of his d.o.b. While he’s trying to get me to buy his deployed sob story and claim of 1994, I overhear my guy say “yours too?”... SMH... So I take his boy’s ID too and it’s another military id with the last digit obliterated. So... You two Air Force enlistees... with IDs issued in 2017... have gone through sooo much in the last year that your IDs lost your birth year??... Ummm....Nooo... I’ve never seen one of these Ids messed up like this and you guys are trying to hand me two at the same time?? No thanks... Plus, I see a liiiittle piece that got left at the top on this one so that definitely wasn’t a “4″ once upon a time.
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