aestaetickookies

[aestaetickookies]

nibble on her toes in the night to assert dominance

i... i don't know how to respond.

is this about my sister? i am so confused. i literally just opened tumblr after a long time and this is the first thing i see.

[aestaetickookies]

i just visited my cousins after not seeing them for 5 years. the girl is 10 years old and she acts cringy and the boy is (i think) 7 and he's a brat. my aunt is loud but fun.

now, my uncle. i really like him because he understands me. he plays a lot of instruments. he has like 5 guitars, 4 pianos, a drum set, and a lot of random ones too. i played the piano there and he liked it. my mom showed him my art and he praised me. he understands that i want tattoos and different colored hair.

he was talking to everyone and everyone looked bored except me. we are similar and it feels nice to have someone talk to me about this because even though my family supports me, they don't really talk to me about that.

i really want to show more of my art to him. he's also supposed to come over in the future to tune our piano.

i know no one probably cares, but i wanted to tell someone

[aestaetickookies]

my mom has gotten more into kpop and downloaded all the songs i bought onto her phone.

which means she downloaded songs like make a wish (english version), nectar, drip, and more.

i hope she doesn't pay attention to them.

[aestaetickookies]

i just found out my sister is either bi/pan without her knowing. because me and my brother knew she had a discord so we were filming a video to show to our mom (because she's not allowed to have a discord). we saw that she was talking to a friend on how she told her crush that she liked her but then told her it was a dare and said (to her friend) that they were both bi/pan.

i mean, i'm fine with it except for one little problem. i'm pan. so now i want to come out first so it won't seem like i'm copying her if she comes out first.

i don't like life.

[aestaetickookies]

let me be sad

[aestaetickookies]

a true story

this story is about my little sister. let's start from the beginning, shall we? (also the beginning's a little boring but it's the background information you need to understand the story fully)

me and my brother used to have an iphone 6 (each of course). i had been begging my parents to get me an iphone 11. so the day comes and they both get iphone 12s so me and my brother get their old phones (which are iphone 10s). that left 3 iphone 6s without an owner. nobody was going to use my old one because that's trash. you can have it open and watch the battery go from 80 to 20% in 2 minutes. so there were 2 phones left.

since me and my brother got new phones, my sister has been asking for a phone too. i'm 16 and i barely got a phone number 2 summers ago before i went into 10th grade but i've had the phone since 8th grade. my brother is 14 and he's had his phone for a while too, but i don't think he'll get a phone number till he's in 11th grade. my sister is in the 6th grade so there's no reason for her to get one.

well, she decided herself that she gets one of the phones. she bought a phone case and a pop socket and stuck it on there. my parents let her because she was only going to listen to music on there really.

i don't know if you know this, but my sister is a big liar. she lies about almost everything. she lied that she uses both of the leftover phones, so my mom took one away and put it in a drawer that we never open, so my sister only had one phone.

then, a couple weeks later, my mom got an email about someone buying 3 stray kids things and the total being $40. she knows i like stray kids, but she never asked me anything and went straight for my sister. my sister kept saying that she never bought anything and stuff, but of course, that was a lie.

my mom had a talk with her about how lying is not good and then nobody will believe her and stop liking her. my sister must have looked like she understood, even though that talk took up almost an hour.

now, we are in the middle of this story. it's something you wish you would have never have done when you were in the 6th grade. this part is so bad, that it's funny when it's not you who did it. also, i was playing roblox with my cousin, so this next part is part of what i could hear and see and what my brother told me (and he's terrible at explaining).

so my dad has been trying to figure out the science behind the purchasing of the stray kids things for weeks. i, myself, have been trying to comprehend what she actually bought. my dad had to change the password on the apple id and kept needing the codes that went to my phone so i couldn't watch youtube.

then days later, he had the brilliant idea of checking my sister's phone. he got the phone she was using but there was nothing. my sister started saying that she feels bad and wants to go to sleep. it was only like 8 and we sleep at 10.

she tried to leave but my mom asked for the other phone first. my sister asked if she could take her stuff to her room first and my mom said no. then she asked if she could go to the bathroom because she had to poop. my mom still said no but she ended up going. my mom then tried looking for the other phone in the drawer that we never open. it wasn't there. she started looking for it like crazy and couldn't find it. my sister came back from the "bathroom" with the phone.

she had it in her room. earlier that day, she slept in til like 1 pm because she didn't have school. it was clear that she was actually using the phone in her room. we also had a charger that went missing but we figured out where it went.

my sister finally went to her room and my dad and brother investigated the phone. this part, i couldn't hear so this is what my brother told me.

1. she made an email even though my mom kept telling her that she couldn't (it's not that bad but i had to wait after i turned 13 to get one and my brother got it before he turned 13 and my sister got one illegally when she's 11?)

2. she got an instagram account and uses it at like 1 am for 5 hours a day (i've been asking to get an instagram for months now and my mom barely agreed to let me get one in summer)

3. she made her own apple id (to maybe have more privacy so it won't be linked to my parents' phone)

4. she stole one of my parents' visa card to be able to buy stuff (but the card is synced to their phone so she didn't really think things through)

when i use my phone when i'm not supposed to, i just play pixel art (but when i did have an illegal instagram, i used the website one so i can delete my search history but she actually used the app).

the conclusion, which is basically her punishments.

she's not allowed to have a phone until she's 14. she wasn't able to play on the computer for the whole spring break. i think she can only use and hour and a half now on weekends? (because her grades are terrible. i think her gpa is a 2. something and me and my brother have a 4.0). she's only allowed to use the ipad to watch piano videos.

sorry this is kind of long. i wanted to write this down so i can tell my cousins later but i'm starting to forget all the details so i wrote it here. so this is it. i'll be gone for another century so don't miss me.

[aestaetickookies]

i'm trying my best.

eventually you realize you don’t want to die. you just don’t want to live the life you’re living. and slowly you try to create a life you want to live. just gotta start there.

[aestaetickookies]

i want to run away

[aestaetickookies]

demon slayer story

i started watching demon slayer on netflix (on my phone) and i finished episode 5 and i started telling my brother about it cuz it’s really good.

then the next day, i saw my sister drawing one of the characters and you might say “well all anime looks the same, maybe she was drawing someone else” well, she wasn’t. she was writing nezuko all over the paper as well.

so i told my mom that she drew that and my mom was like whatever.

so the day after that, i was going to watch episode 6 and it said i already watched it. i thought i had a bad memory and actually watched up to episode 6, but i read the description and i didn’t watch it.

i told my mom and she was like, “maybe your cousins?” and i said no because they don’t like anime. and then my mom said “well what can i do?” and i got sad and walked away.

but then i walked back and said that it’s tv-14 (my sister’s 11) so my mom went to go ask my sister. here’s how the conversation went:

mom - are you watching demon slayer?

sister - no

mom - be honest

sister - yes

mom - you can’t watch it anymore. it’s tv-14

then my mom walked away. i have to finish watching it soon

[aestaetickookies]

i realized we haven’t talked in a long time

i hate myself for not reaching out earlier

we’re both going through rough patches in life

but we could go through them together

i’m thinking about you at midnight

regretting not sending that email

i miss talking to you

i forgot who you were

but i do remember that i really liked you

i remember how happy i felt whenever i heard from you

i wish we could do that again

i hate life getting in the way

but that’s not an excuse

i’ll try harder

just for you

let’s not leave each other any more

[aestaetickookies]

once i get an instagram, i’ll get 3 accounts. personal, photocard trading and art. on my personal one, i’ll just do whatever. on my photocard trading, i’ll sell/buy and trade my photocards. on my art one, i’ll post my art and i’ll also do poetry.

[aestaetickookies]

i’m not committed but i’ll try

journal jar challenge

100 journal prompts for you to pick out each day: make and decorate a little jar, write all these prompts on bits of paper (or just print them out) and put them in the jar, and then pick out one each day and write about it in your journal. if you are thinking about starting one, this is a good excuse to start!

1. your favourite band right now 2. the last concert you went to 3. dear ______, here is something ive never told you 4. yourself 5. body positivity 6. what kept you awake last night? 7. food 8. some things that make you happy 9. cultural appropriation 10. colours 11. dear past me 12. fluffy blankets 13. highs and lows of today 14. a playlist for when you are feeling sad   15. how did you feel this morning? 16. your favourite book  17. your friends 18. ten quotes you love 19. someone you really want to punch 20. dear future me 21. your pets 22. the most fun you have ever had 23. your sunshine 24. what did you dream last night?  25. what are you worrying about? 26. places you have enjoyed visiting 27. a playlist for when you’re angry 28. what song makes you dance?   29. draw your feelings 30. someone who inspires you  31. how was your week? 32. write something down that you can’t tell a soul 33. who, from your past, would you not mind seeing? 34. something that scared you today 35. write a wishlist 36. what are the world’s problems today? 37. ten restaurants you love 38. what is your saddest memory? 39. what are you looking forward to? 40. a playlist for when you are happy 41. your favourite season 42. a headline from the newspaper today 43. what did you learn this week? 44. write a letter to someone you need to forgive (this could be yourself). 45. how do you stand out from the crowd? 46. short term goals 47. what would you like to do today? 48. list your otps 49. what have you been thinking about the most today? 50. your strangest talent 51. thoughts on religion 52. reality check: something you need to realise but can’t admit to yourself 53. do you believe in karma? 54. what is your greatest weakness and strength? 55. do you feel like you belong? 56. five songs that make you smile 57. are you happy with yourself? 58. a memory with a family member 59. why you are grateful for someone 60. where are you right now? 61. someone you admire 62. a good movie you watched recently 63. what can you smell right now? 64. dear ______, i love you because 65. a playlist for when you’re uninspired 66. the worst place you have been to 67. a song that really resonates with you 68. what does your dream room look like? 69. what is the weather like right now? 70. if you wanted someone to really understand who you are, what would they have to read, listen to, and watch? 71. where do you see yourself in 10 years? 72. have you been bullied? 73. are you an artist? 74. one word that describes your mood 75. how are you feeling, pal? 76. do you feel you were born in the wrong era? 77. something that inspires you to become an activist 78. what do you dislike about yourself and why? 79. something that makes you laugh 80. top ten movies to watch 81. who is the most supportive person in your life right now? 82. make a collage that is aesthetically pleasing for you 83. don’t hold back, just vent until your hand hurts 84. if you were an animal, what animal would you be? 85. who do you miss? 86. first five words that come to your mind 87. do you sometimes doubt your existence? 88. a playlist for dancing to 89. long term goals 90. the most disappointed you have ever been 91. how are your relationships with others going? 92. your ideal world 93. paste an image here 94. somewher you would like to be right now 95. why are you upset? 96. talk about your best friend 97. ten people you want to meet 98. a poem you like 99. your favourite story 100. what makes you smile?

[aestaetickookies]

you’re the only flower

in a field of dead grass

[aestaetickookies]

i’ve never been okay, but thanks for asking

yesterday, i put my blood sweat and tears into making dinner for me and my brother. i made tuna sandwiches. i cut my finger. i was bleeding. i was crying. and of course, i was sweating. i was face timing with my cousin. she heard the whole thing. she was laughing. i’m typing this with one hand because my finger is injured. i’m sad.

[aestaetickookies]

i lost the ribbon

my key chain finally came in

[aestaetickookies]

i’m looking through my things for something and i found this. i can still feel the pain on my finger. i haven’t made tuna sandwiches since then

yesterday, i put my blood sweat and tears into making dinner for me and my brother. i made tuna sandwiches. i cut my finger. i was bleeding. i was crying. and of course, i was sweating. i was face timing with my cousin. she heard the whole thing. she was laughing. i’m typing this with one hand because my finger is injured. i’m sad.

[aestaetickookies]

it took me 8 minutes to write this and it took my teacher 40 minutes to respond (i think i scared her)

guess who’s getting an A?!?!

ok so

i had to be in a group project and long story short, i got real mad and sent this to my english teacher

“You have recently graded our project and left a note. You were saying that 2 of the questions have been copied from an internet source. Out of everyone from my group, I have answered the most questions. We have 8 in total and I have done 5. I’m not even sure if my teammates have turned theirs in. The 2 questions you are referring to were not ones that I have done. I would like to get a better grade on this project, but I am afraid that my teammates won’t fix this problem, nor do I want to, as I was the one who did the most work. I would not like to fix the mistakes of my teammates, as I carried the team and would not like to help them again. This is why I would rather much work on my own. Could I do it on my own and not help them once again?”