President Obama’s “before and after” reaction to the Supreme Court ruling.
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How come in movies with apocalyptic situations there’s always graffiti everywhere like “god save us” and “this is the end” like who the fuck has time for that put your can of spray paint away jimmy and get in the fucking van we’re trying to evacuate
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Girl: u like horror games?
Me: ye
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what if we had vision like bats, like:
hey what do you think of my haircut
JSUT A FUCKIN SECOND LEMEM AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IT LOOKS GREAT HAROLD
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Having sex outside sounds pretty adventurous but what if a bug crawl up ya asshole then what you gone do
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please signal boost this
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Person: You don't talk much!
Me: I'm observing your weaknesses since you're so freely verbalizing everything about yourself.
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me: i love this movie
someone, inevitably: it's not that great. here's my 7 page analysis of why it's not that great.
me: cool
me: i love this movie
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In Bed with the Bae
Her: Babe I wanna have a baby
Me: When?
Her: Right now… *Climbs on top of me*
Me: *Throws her off*
*pulls out Calendar*
Me: Uh uh. Look here.. right now it’s September and approximately 9 months from now it’ll be around June, which means there’s a strong chance our baby could be a Gemini. Too Risky. Let’s not.
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‘I Don’t Know What I Did But It Worked’ — A thrilling story about my academic life
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When your family has guests over
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