99kiss-my-axe99

[99kiss-my-axe99]

Moving house tomorrow

[99kiss-my-axe99]

sir that's yassified information

[99kiss-my-axe99]

every time i think, i take 10 damage

[99kiss-my-axe99]

Me posting on tumblr:

[99kiss-my-axe99]

Heavy is the chest that wears the tits or whatever

[99kiss-my-axe99]

"Kill them with kindness" WRONG. drop the opera house chandelier on them.

[99kiss-my-axe99]

realized my wife didn’t shut our door all the way when they left for work so then i spent 40m panic searching for their cat both inside and outside. luckily my wife came home and found him in the backyard with another cat (he’s fixed so it’s fine). he was hiding from me bc he was fucking. i’m so angry.

[99kiss-my-axe99]

hi bestie,

quick questoin

would ?

[99kiss-my-axe99]

you ever take a shower and suddenly you're human again

[99kiss-my-axe99]

Europe during Eurovision: I love esc so much it’s such a nice little gay event and

Europe as soon as the winner is announced: Honestly fuck off

[99kiss-my-axe99]

if villain why slutty waist

[99kiss-my-axe99]

It feels like

I'm collecting Pokémon

[99kiss-my-axe99]

[99kiss-my-axe99]

my blood looks more beautiful than yours it's a more luscious red

[99kiss-my-axe99]

I could never do wrestling if someone's neck was that close to my face and their legs wrapped around me I'd be so horny they'd have to shoot me like a boar

[99kiss-my-axe99]

Opening up Tumblr and finding out they changed the app icon to get rid of the Little Logo Guy:

[99kiss-my-axe99]