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googoobabajogwick · 1 year

Text

Hot Knife Chpt. 4

description: john pleads his case which leads to more arguments and then you make your decision, also you tell your daughters about a little secret you've been keeping and more about your past.

triggers: unhealthy coping mechanisms, mini spoilers (aka some of the plot of part 4 is explained) misogyny, john getting ganged up on lol

wordcount: 6.5k

mini authors note: this chapter probably sucks but idc im sick and tired of looking at it... also very dialogue heavy.

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Hot Knife Chapter Four: Follow Your Heart But It's Split In Two

“I brought the marker. I didn't want to but, you are my last hope. I can’t kill everyone myself.” John sounded desperate, “Believe me, of all people, after everything, I didn't want to drag you into this.”

“And yet, here you are.” Kat butted in.

You knew it would be impossible for him to talk with your daughters there so you excused them. The two of them were a bit reluctant but then you gave them that look. They stood up right away and began to leave the room without another word but not before Kat went behind your desk and opened the drawer. You were about to ask her what she was doing when she pulled out a bottle of vodka.

“So you don’t make her drink herself into hysterics again.” She all but spat at him.

“Christ! Tatyana, Darya, leave now.” Your tone was commanding.

They looked at you with worried eyes and left. Although they were nervous they knew you were not one to fall right back into his arms. Both women just hoped that he wasn't going to hurt you again, not physically, but mentally.

Now that it was just you and John you leaned back in your chair and took a deep breath.

“Do you drink a lot?” He asked and you looked at him with rage in your eyes.

“It’s none of your business but no, I don’t.”

“Tatyana seems to think you do.” He knew you tended to have unhealthy habits.

At this you sat up straight, feeling like a bomb about to explode.

“So let me get this straight. You break my heart, you come find me after like twenty years to what? Call me an alcoholic? Like bringing the marker here wasn’t a deep enough cut you have to rub salt in the wound?” You asked, getting louder and louder.

“No. You know I wouldn’t do that.”

“You just did!”

The thought of taking a sip of alcohol filled your brain. How you would instantly relax even from the smell. You never let it get in the way of your life or work. You didn’t drink that much in your opinion… Maybe he was right but you’d never tell him that. He opened his mouth to speak but closed it just as fast. You needed to change the subject or else you would attack him again because his face was looking quite punchable in the moment,

“Whatever. Let’s just not talk about me. Back to it, why don't you ask Sofia? I know you have her marker.” By the look on his face you could tell the answer.

“I told you, I already did, I have her, The Bowery King and others helping me. It’s still not enough.” He tried to read your facial expressions. “Please.”

He went onto explain the out Winston had given him. That he already tried to convince The Elder to let him… Go away. Which didn’t work. John just needed to get to Japan and Berlin. Lots of old names were brought up but you didn't focus on that all you could focus on was when he mentioned the Roma Ruska in Berlin.

The “family” that brought you in after your father was shot and killed. Not that you would ever refer to them as your family, that just made it appear like you and him were brother and sister… They called each other cousin, brother, sister, aunt and uncle but you never did. You chalked it up to the fact that you had a family already. These people could never be that.

You wanted to escape that place from the moment you were brought there. The only good memories from there were Jardani himself but even so, most of those memories were painful too. You spent too many years crying every night because you hated it so much. Sobbing for your father and mother in the privacy of your room. Then the whole Vladimir situation happened and deepened that hatred.

The Roma Ruska was the only part of your past you'd never told your daughters about. It was always just ‘where I grew up’ whenever you would talk about your younger years. Never would you even want to tell them about that place. John could, if he wanted to. Since your ‘family’ had seats at the table he would be able to challenge the Marquis de Gramont to hand to hand combat.

“Why should I?” You questioned back.

John could tell there was so much more to talk about but there just wasn't time, he needed your help now. He would answer every question you had if there was. There was a new resentment for you in a way, for hiding your children. He had never even considered being a dad but he did know he never wanted to be a deadbeat one.

That's how he knew your children viewed him too. He began to think about how you would've told him, watching your stomach grow, finding out they were twin girls, taking their first steps, their first words. Teaching them to drive, to read, to defend themselves, the list was endless. His chest grew tight.

“You never told me about them.” John tried to hide the emotion in his voice but you heard it. “I knew there was a reason you were throwing up…”

“You broke my heart.” Your voice was a whisper.

“I would’ve-“ He stopped as you cut him off.

“You would’ve what? Decided to be with me because you felt obligated to?”

“No- That’s not…” The man put his face in his hands.

He never really cared about you seeing his real emotions because even if he tried to hide them, he knew you could see them. This was true, and if he could go back twenty years and slap his younger self he would. In fact he'd slap the face of himself from a month ago. Then maybe he wouldn't be here, dragging you into what could possibly be the death of you.

After thinking of the math for a second he looked up at you. The betrayal in his eyes was overwhelming to look at

“You came to my house when they were what? Ten? You could’ve told me.” He was talking louder than usual.

John never got angry with you. Frustrated and upset but almost never angry. Right now though you could tell he was enraged with you by the pinch of his eyebrows and the slight snarl on his lip for a brief second but you wouldn’t be intimidated by him. Even if he had a right to be angry, you had your reasons.

“When I came to your house it was for one reason to get my favor and I had no clue you were,” You curled your fingers up and down, mockingly, “out of the business.”

“I told you—.”

“What? That you left? Sorry, I didn’t want to break the news with your wife upstairs. Hey John, remember me? Well I bore your seed ten years ago!”

He scoffed and then groaned but you continued on.

“Plus I really don’t think you’d want me to meet her, which would’ve happened if you met them. At that point we were all strangers, no point.” Your arms came up as you crossed them.

John’s grip on the arm rest tightened at what you were insinuating. Were you really that angry? To hurt an innocent woman who’d done nothing to you? That wasn’t like you at all. You ended things! He wanted to talk things through, you wanted to run away and start a whole new life.

“We could have made things work.” John insisted.

“Oh yeah like what sneaking around behind her back for visits? Hm?”

“No. Helen could have met them, you could’ve met her. I don’t know but you could have told me.”

You stood up and placed your palms on the flat wooden desk. Your body leaned towards him as you got closer. The pain meds they gave you worked well but it still stung. How dare he! How dare he walk in here and even bring up the idea of another woman helping you raise your children. Yeah you had multiple women help you raise your girls but it was different when it came to your ex and his wife.

There was jealousy and anger. In a perfect, normal world yeah maybe you, John and his wife Helen could have raised your daughters. But you guys weren’t normal. He made that very clear when you broke up.

“Let me make one thing clear Johnathan, at that time in my life I would’ve rather drown my girls than ever let you and another woman raise them together.” You sat back down and crossed your arms again, “I asked you to leave with me and we could’ve found out together. You said no and made your decision, so I made mine.”

He listened to your words. There was nothing he could say. There would be no compromise with your anger. At the time John was younger and a fool. It took him making the one single right decision— leaving for Helen— to see this fact about himself. Too caught up in his rise to fame in such a taboo career to see how all it was all one big painful reminder of all the pain you suffered. John remembered you always wanting to spend more time with him and your occasional random questions about your future and leaving.

At the time he thought they were just fun little ideas to imagine to escape the reality that he’d be leaving the next day and he could be gone for hours, days or even months. That he could die. Being away from one another all the time had caused issues in your relationship a lot in the past. The two of you fought the most while he was in the military but that was because he’d be gone for so long with long periods of no contact.

If the two of you weren’t spending all day in bed or having sex when he had time to spend it home, petty arguments would begin. He didn’t miss you that much, it was his choice to join, when he’d try and tell you how much he missed you. He’s just going to leave again, when he’d tell you he was coming home. You’d never argue with him when he had time to talk to you while deployed, that time was precious.

It was like clockwork; He’d come home, the first four days were amazing. Filled with sex, cuddling, deep conversations and going out. Then came the smaller disagreements, until you were crying and arguing all night. If he loved you, why would he leave you? If he missed you, why did he take hits when he wasn’t deployed?

Once he was out he became a hit man full time, working for Viggo. Killing. It came so naturally to him it was inevitable for him to become a preeminent assassin. Which meant the whole life was unavoidable. John was beginning to believe he’d never escape but it seemed so close and if you helped him nobody stood a chance. But then again If he survived and you didn't, could he live with himself? If one of your girls died?

Maybe John couldn't do this. Maybe he could just continue on as he has been. After that horrible first meeting about an hour ago, did he really want to do this to you? Maybe if he never fell off that roof he could do it alone but even though he’s lucky to have survived, things still hurt. He stared at your bandaged hands and now noticed the faint scars on your wrist, he almost wanted to ask but vertical cuts were self explanatory.

John couldn't look at them anymore. He’d already hurt you and it was just by showing up. Dragging you into this mess would just be causing more damage. You still had yet to say anything else but you watched him, lost in thought thinking about what to say. Finally he nodded and stood up.

“I'm sorry for coming here, I really shouldn't have.” He was willing to be the bigger person, and with that he stood up and turned to leave.

You almost wondered if this is how he felt watching you get up and leave. Probably not because the strong emotional connection wasn't there anymore. It would always be there but it was no longer that huge inferno it used to be. There were still lit embers. John was going to die if he walked out that door. Were you ready for that? It would seem after so long the answer would be an obvious yes but if you were being honest, no you weren't. You slammed your hands on the table and winced.

“John, wait.” You avoided his gaze as his hand held onto the doorknob, “A marker is a marker.”

The long haired man went to say your name but you stopped him.

“A marker is a marker, but then, we are done. Forever.” You got up. “Please wait here.”

You left the room and went to go talk to your girls and inform them on your decision. As expected they were not in agreement with you. Kat had asked if he had something against you, which he did, but not like she thought. It wasn’t really about the marker. Darya just watched while she shook her head in disappointment. Sometimes you felt like they were the mothers and you were the kid. You explained to them that sometimes, when you burn bridges, you burn the strong foundation but there is still debris.

The debris of yours and Jardani’s bridge reminded you that there were still things that needed to be talked about. Two of those things stood right in front of you. You had grown up. Yes, you were still emotional and impulsive but what you did back then was too impulsive. When you thought back all those years ago you were too blinded by anger to see that he really did want to work things out. The time had come to face your mistakes, the guilt hidden by rage. You always felt like you never got your closure, maybe now would be the time to get it. Still you would not let him off easy as it was not that simple.

Plus.. There may have been one lie you had been keeping to yourself, even away from your own daughters. The truth was, the last time you saw John was after you had gotten the news that he had fallen from The Continental roof. Yes, your reaction was genuine when he told you though, I mean, who falls off a multiple story high building and lived to tell the story besides John fucking Wick? The story had brought back feelings you thought were gone. You thought he was going to be dead. A month ago you’d say John Wick’s death would be a holiday for you to celebrate but then it almost actually happened.

Late into the night you snuck out after Algo had explained to you that he was under The Bowery King’s watch. At the time you had to see for yourself, you were always good at getting into places you weren't supposed to be, so, you snuck into his created kingdom to find your ex-lover. John was sedated at the time as you looked down on him. He looked terrible and you had to keep yourself from touching him. You saw that he was missing a finger and gasped.

“Now how the hell did you get in here?” You jumped at the King’s loud, booming voice.

He looked at you and then John.

“I'm not here to start anything, I just had to see for myself.” Your arms came to wrap around yourself as you suddenly felt very uncomfortable.

“The whole underworld thinks you to be dead. Love and grief brought him back, don’t let it bring you back.” He chuckled.

“I don’t know what you’re saying, I just had to see. He fell off a roof for Christ sake!” You didn’t like what he was implying.

“Uh-huh.” He paused for a moment, “He’s one strong motherfucker that's for sure.”

You nodded. Jardani had always surprised you, always. He always bounced back and he could always do what you thought was impossible. There was a time when you believed you were unlovable and that one could ever get past the strong brick walls you had built yourself but, he had done that as well. You smiled at the memories even though it made your heart hurt and you preferred not to think of them. John looked so peaceful and young as he slept. His chest went up and down with every breath, the only sign that he was alive.

“What is his recovery plan?” The doctor in you had to ask.

The Bowery King went on to tell you that he showed really good signs of healing and walking. He told you he had the best doctors helping out but that was a lie, because you were the best. You listened and gave some advice before giving him a small smile. When John groaned you took it as your cue to leave, not wanting to face him. With a please to the King not to tell him you were there, you left. The entire way home, making sure no one was following you. You couldn’t stop thinking about how much you wanted to reach out and touch him.

Later that night while you showered you pressed your forehead against the ceramic tiles. Your emotions were all over the place. You felt like you were going insane. How does one feel so much hatred and anger and so much love and worry at the same time. The only comfort you had was the hot water hitting your back. You knew John had your marker and if there was a time he was going to have to use it, it was now. The only thing that gave you hope was that he had no idea where you were but The Bowery King must’ve by now. You were still hidden but the thought wouldn't leave you, you just had a bad feeling.

Your daughters looked at you, their mouths agape. The anger on their face was evident. You had lied to them and that was something that was very serious between all of you.

“You do realize that's most likely how he found us!” Tatyana yelled.

“Kat is right, it was your doing that brought him to us.” Darya shook her head.

You scoffed at them.

“Enough. I am in my fifties. I don't need you two acting as if I'm the child!”

“All the nights of us listening to you cry! As kids we had to endure watching our own mother struggle, even try and kill herself all over that piece of shit man! And now, you just fell right back into his arms.” Kat was furious.

Now you frowned at them. What they said hurt and you knew their reasonings, they had to witness things kids are not supposed to. You took full credit for that and although it never spoiled your relationship, it had caused some bumps. After so many years and them reaching an age when they began to understand things healed. You'd done so many things you regretted and now seeing him and talking to him in person, it brought up a lot of feelings you had buried deep inside. You looked at your two beautiful girls who looked so much like him.

“We just want what's best for you mama.” Darya said in a soft tone.

Kat glared at her before she looked defeated and stared at the ground. With reluctance, she nodded. You were their mother, and there was no greater bond than a mother and her daughters. Their role model, their protector, their rock. If anything happened to you, they would burn down the Earth just as you used to tell them growing up. Tatyana didn't want to admit it but she was intrigued with her father, having always wondered what he sounded like or what he'd be like. Darya too.

“I love you girl’s more than anything. He was going to leave. He was going to let us be… I just can’t but, if you really don't want me to, I’ll tell him no. You two are my world, way more than he is.” You teared up.

The two of them watched you for a moment longer. Of course they wanted you to tell him no, but they couldn't, they knew how bad it would hurt you if he died and you didn't get your closure. The one minute older sister grabbed the youngers hand and began to drag her away.

“Come on Rya, we have to go pack.”

“You two aren't coming! I don't need you getting hurt.” Your eyes widened and you protested.

“You can’t stop us.” Kat said as she took her sister away.

You stood there dumbfounded. There was no changing their minds, they were stubborn just like both their parents. Your children, no matter how much you loved them, seemed to have gotten all your bad traits. Perhaps that was your doing by having children during the most stressful, horrible time in your life.

Fear gnawed at you, they were skilled but they had only ever gone after normal, weaker men who attacked their girlfriends and wives because it was easy. Never someone who’d been training their whole life and taking contracts on people who were skilled in their fighting techniques.

You stayed in that hallway for a few more minutes before going to find Algo, it would be her who would gather the women who wanted to help and those who didn’t. Though you preferred to just go at this alone with him, you knew if you could not stop your girls, you could not stop any of the women who had grown to love you and them.

It was decided that the team of female volunteers, Algo and your daughters would move to a second location somewhere out of state. There they would set up. INM was already hidden, outside the city down a long dirt path. You always said you wanted to go back to the woods and the woods helped keep it secret.

The only way people knew about it was word of mouth. You had friends in doctors offices, psychiatrists, police officers, women who just worked everyday jobs and even homeless women who just patrolled the streets of the city to watch for women in need. It was your own classified network that expanded all over the country.

You wanted to spread it out more and while there was only one physical Izanami No Mikoto the idea had unfurled farther than you ever thought it would. What helped, in your opinion, was that the network was made up of everyday women. This meant that every female affiliated with the INM had a sworn duty to help other women and children in need.

The lawyers offered free legal representation, doctors had free medical care to give, the wealthy had money to provide, it all worked out even more perfectly than you could have ever imagined. Your dream had become a reality and you would do anything in your power to protect that… No matter what and that’s why they were leaving what you felt was your home.

Any male who followed a woman there or found the place was disposed of right away. It was a female sanctuary. John would be the only one to walk away but still, he was male and knew the location and it was decided that Shizuoka would stay and run INM, while also looking for a new place to move to.

After everything was planned out you embraced Algo and Shizuoka. You thanked them for everything and being by your side through even the worst of times and most of all, you thanked them for all their help in raising your beautiful daughters. You’d be forever indebted to them. It was a tearful goodbye with Shizuoka crying out,

“This is not goodbye! We will see you soon!” She pulled you in for one more hug.

You walked with your daughters who had joined halfway through to their shared room they never grew out of. Tatyana had her own room but never slept in it, she liked to be with her sister. When they were fourteen you all redid their room together. Painted blue with two double beds on opposite sides of the room. Kat’s side was cleaner than Darya’s which came as a surprise to you.

Your quiet daughter tended to be more serious. She had a very dry sense of humor and spoke in a way that drove most who didn’t know her insane. Yet for all her more proper qualities she couldn’t put her clothes in a basket to save her life. Kat always cleaned the room, in fact she loved cleaning. You thought it was a good outlet for her as she did it a lot while she was stressed.

As you followed them into their room your eyes noticed the painted hands on the wall. It was yours, Tatyana’s, Darya’s and Algo’s. You smiled. All of you were messing around after you finished fixing up the room. Algo had the great idea to leave your mark on the wall. You would be cutting that off the wall and taking it wherever you went next. Kat laid in her bed and you sat by her feet which she placed on your lap. Darya went on and continued packing.

“So, all this? All because our father is here? I mean we usually plan things out this way but we don‘t evacuate.” Your daughter asked with a confused face as she put a couple shirts she liked in a box.

“Yeah, he’s a very wanted man. We don’t want to risk anything.” You explained.

“What does that mean for you? Like are the stories I’ve overheard true? Has he killed that many people? Have that many people died?” Kat asked. “I mean how much danger are you going to be in by helping him?”

You sighed. As they grew up you didn’t tell them much. They sure as hell didn’t know you used to kill people until they were older and found out themselves. A common game they liked to play; Why Won’t Mom Talk About Her Past? Something they played a lot much to your dismay. You told them multiple times to stop when you would catch them playing it— which wasn’t hard for you— that there were things they didn’t need to know.

Tatyana and Darya were trouble makers but always for the right reason. Getting suspended for defending someone or themselves. Finding out information on you because they were worried about you. While it was annoying— and expensive because you had to bribe the school with all your money to keep them enrolled— you knew they did it because they had good hearts.

Something you were going to inform John on when you next saw him, was that they grew up with you teaching them everything you knew about fighting under the guise of self defense. This was because you only trusted yourself to educate them the best, considering your vast knowledge on the subject. They were good but they had never seen something like this.

You gave them— for the most part considering they now help you— a normal life. They went to a private school, partook in sports, clubs, graduated early, and had a good group of friends. It was really starting to hit you just how much you fucked up showing up to see him. Your momentary lapse in judgment put your children in a world of danger they didn’t know about. You trusted Algo to keep them safe but you suddenly felt sick.

“I’m so sorry. I should’ve told you this all before I made my decision.” Your hand left its current resting place to lay on Tatyana’s knee, “I will tell you everything but I want you to know that I didn’t keep this from you to lie, but to give you a normal life.”

Although you were going to leave it up to your ex— lucky him, you rolled your eyes— you began to tell them the story of your past.

“My father wasn’t a good person. Taught me everything I knew and loved me. I didn’t get to go to school like you guys did. He homeschooled me, taught me to live off the grid.” You chuckled thinking about how crazy your biological father was, “He was a bit of a doomsayer but he had his reasons, surviving all he had. You have to remember he was born during the 1930’s Ukraine. I- I shouldn’t be defending him.”

“Why? What makes you suggest he is a bad person?” Darya looked intrigued. “You always talked about him when we were kids.”

“He was a good father to me.”

This was something you struggled with a lot. In fact you would lay in bed a lot when you and Jardani were together and express this to him as he was the one person you felt couldn’t judge you no matter what. Your father was your number one support system as a child. Always spending time with you, listening to your feelings and protecting you. Teaching you to be strong and frightening.

With such a cold mother it was hard not to gravitate to the parent that gave you warmth and love. Little did you know how cold he could be towards your mother as they both hid it well from you. As you grew older you understood why your mother resented you. She knew all he was doing, and put up with it out of love and fear but still he treated you with so much love.

How horrible; A mother jealous of her own daughter, a twelve year old at that. When you began to understand her a bit more, thanks to therapy, it all made sense in a very sad way. While your father could do romantic gestures— having random outbursts where he was quite passionate— he could only experience romantic love in his own way.

You believed to him it was easier to love you than your mother, but he did love her. Your mother was insecure, and affectionate. When someone like that is starved of the love they crave they’re bound to get jealous at the sight of any bit of kindness that's not directed at them. Sadly it happened to be her own child. You’re mother should’ve never been a mother and it’s as simple as that.

She died for him; teaching your twelve year old brain a sick way of thinking about love. Still, in a guilty way, you missed him and her even though they were horrible people. You had good stories because you were oblivious to his crimes for a long time before you found out.

“One day I ventured out into the woods of my backyard and I found him, killing a man. I ran to my room and freaked out, I was twelve. That was my father, I almost thought what I saw wasn’t real… but it was.”

“Holy shit.” Kat got up but leaned back on her arms.

“Before I could make up my mind, the cops stormed my house and my mother and father were shot dead right in front of me. He was a serial killer” Your voice was calm, though you had never told them, you yourself had come to terms with what you witnessed.

The twins watched you, intrigued. They were finally going to find out everything they wanted to know about you, straight from the source itself.

“A detective took me in for a bit. He was never home, always out and I practically lived on my own for a year until he brought me to meet a woman who went by the name The Director. She took me in and that’s where I met your father, he was the only one who could ever make me feel safe. Where I grew up was called the Roma Ruska. Due to my prior history, she trained me to be a skilled assassin alongside Jardani.” You rubbed your thighs out of an anxious habit.

“My eyes were opened to a completely second, secret world. When I was fifteen the worst event in my life took place, causing me to hate the Roma Ruska even more. I grew up taking hits with him and completing contracts until we broke up. I left, everyone thought I was dead apparently, except John and a couple others. Then I found out I was pregnant with you… The rest is history but now he’s here because he needs help and has my stupid marker.”

“What like exactly is a marker anyways?” Kat was listening with an intense interest.

“It’s a blood oath. When someone does a big enough favor for you, you give them your bloody finger print and if they ever need you to do anything for them, they bring the marker to you. It’s only complete when both parties' finger fingerprints are there. John and I gave them to each other because…” This time your voice started to waiver, “We were in love with each other. I didn’t think they’d be used this way but I was an idiot and had him complete his.”

“Why don’t you just say no?” Darya came to sit on her bed which was across from her sisters.

You sighed.

“There are two rules in that world. No business on hotel grounds and you must complete the marker, or you will be taken care off. No refusing or killing whoever has it. I used mine years ago for something small.” There was no reason to explain what the first rule was and they didn’t seem to care anyways.

“And he’s making you do this? What if…” Kat started.

“Someone else was to kill him?” Darya finished.

“You two are not killing your own father. At first he was but like I said he changed his mind and got up to leave. That’s basically all of it, so to answer your original question, it’s very dangerous. But I promise I’m good at what I do, and so is he.”

Both of your daughters stayed silent for a few minutes, taking in everything you had just said. They had millions of questions but based on your demeanor you didn’t seem in the mood to go into more details. The two women looked at each other before Darya got up and sat on Kat’s bed, giving you a hug. Tatyana joined in on the little group hug.

You let out one sob before wrapping your arms around them. These two women were your whole world, your reasons to continue on. Once they were born it was easier to forget about Jardani and everything you had been through. No matter what, you always had them, always. You pulled back to smile at them.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what? We still love you!” Tatyana hugged you tighter.

“Yeah!”

Your response was immediate as you loved them too. More than they could ever begin to believe. With a kiss to each of their heads you thanked them and promised you’d say goodbye in the morning. Lots of hugging was happening as you embraced them longer and tighter than usual. They wished they could come with you but it was just too dangerous.

It was about an hour later when you made it back to the room you left John in. He was probably dying of boredom and you laughed. Just as expected he was half asleep in the chair, looking uncomfortable. You called his name and he jumped up, prepared for anything but it was just you. He relaxed and exhaled.

“So?” He asked.

“There are some things you need to know. One, I gave our daughters a very normal life and I just had to tell them everything. Something I never wanted to do. They can fight but they aren’t experts, I taught them myself.”

“Then maybe I should leave. I don’t want to put them in danger.”

You didn’t miss the way he only mentioned them. Of course he wouldn’t care about you being in danger but at this point even you didn’t care about yourself too much. It was too late, you told him. By showing up he had ruined everything and you all would have to start new. There would be a lot to do tomorrow morning and the day was coming to an end. You told him to follow you and brought him to your room.

“Two, you’re not allowed anywhere else in this building. In fact you’re going to be the only male to ever walk out of here alive.” Your tone was harsh and your face was serious. “You can sleep on the floor because you certainly are not getting my bed.”

With that you threw some oversized men’s sleep pants and a shirt that you liked to wear at him. You were not going to make him sleep in that suit. Not for his sake though, you told yourself, but you didn’t know if you could fall asleep with him in that insufferable thing. Too formal, too fitting and not at all stretchy enough. It would be like sleeping in wet clothes in your opinion.

You hated those suits no matter how good he looked in them. John gave you a nod of thanks and you both turned to change.

Being all snuggled into bed you knew it would take forever for you to fall asleep as you were very worried for the up and coming days. You grabbed a hidden vodka bottle that was under your night stand and took a shot. A moan left your mouth at the familiar burn in your throat. You threw back another before offering it to John which he denied. You shrugged before taking two more back to back.

The buzz was a bit strong and although you wouldn’t get a good night's rest it would help you fall asleep faster than without. The silence was almost deafening as all you could hear were the sounds of your guys breathing. The two of you hadn’t slept in the same room in decades and the awkwardness was very strong. You just couldn’t take it.

“Jardani?” You whispered into the dark.

“Yeah?”

“Why did you wear that stupid suit here?” It made no sense for him to dress his best to see you.

“It's bulletproof.” He responded.

“Oh.” You winced, it still probably hurt like hell to get hit. “That’s new.”

John gave you a hum of acknowledgement to let you know he heard you. The silence settled once again but this time it wasn’t as uncomfortable. The alcohol was taking effect and before you knew it you were falling asleep. It had been a rough day and you hoped that tomorrow would be better but you didn’t have high hopes. Things were only going to get much worse.

#john wick fanfic #john wick x reader #john wick x y/n #john wick x you

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