#this is me under the effect of clonex btw i think if i didn't take it i would've been way worse now

[daz4i]

sometimes i will be having violent suicidal thoughts and i won't even be too panicked or saddened by them. it's more like "god. this again? shut the fuck up. i already know all that. we think about this multiple times a day. can you calm down? i need to sleep."

#anyway that's my situation now #i wrote out a whole lengthy vent post and figured. what's the poing #this is me under the effect of clonex btw i think if i didn't take it i would've been way worse now #good job @2 hours ago me. for catching it before it could fester into a violent reaction. now it's just annoying #sad that idk how I'll fall asleep now tho. it's so late. i need to wake up p early on sunday i should probably set an alarm now too :/ #ough i'm gonna be so tired and disoriented tomorrow if i do. but it'll be worse on sunday if i can't sleep. 😭😭😭 #decisions decisions. all of them wrong. this body won't let me make any good choice 🥲