#n jus over a couple of sex jokes that he never even showed any sign of being uncomfortable w :

[puffpasstea]

A/N: I’ve been having some weird glitches and technical difficulties. I’m not sure if my posts aren’t going through or if I’m not receiving notifications about people seeing them. Please let me know if this is showing up for you? 🥺 it’s not as good as I’d have liked but I know I haven’t posted in a bit so I wanted to get it out for you guys. Lots of way more talented writers have done subspace blurbs way better than I ever could. But I haven’t seen any dom space and subdrop/ domdrop blurbs out there. (Unless I’m just not coming across them. If you know of any, send them my way!) so I wanted to write my own.

summary: dom!h experiencing drop.

warnings: angst? ————

It wasn’t unusual for Harry to be as eagle-eyed as he is tender after sex, so she hadn’t really thought anything of it. Not when he ran his fingers over the red and bruised patches of her skin where the crop had hit her repeatedly, and tried to subtly watch for signs of wincing, or whimpering, or any other indication that he’d injured her. Not when he examined the sides of her neck thoroughly, where his firm grasp had left finger marks. Not even when he’d silently kissed down her body after they’d gotten out of the bath as he massaged her tense muscles and helped her get ready for bed. All of that affection and attention was normal for Harry. It was part of the reason she’d learned to trust and open up to him. He’d always made her feel safe, respected, and cherished. But, looking back on it now, perhaps there was something off about him last night?

She’d been too out of it to notice that maybe he was being quieter than usual. Harry’s been known to crack a few corny jokes afterwards. Usually, that’s his not-so-secret way to assess if she’s out of subspace without asking her or making her feel rushed.  He’d make a couple of jokes and wait for her reaction to see if she’s feeling alert enough to hear and comprehend his jokes. Of course, she’d figured it out pretty quickly after she noticed him watching her carefully as she rolled her eyes at his puns. but, something about his cheesy dad jokes, so soon after he’d railed the shit out of her, made her heart melt so she never confessed that she was on to him. Going back over it in her mind, she doesn’t recall him making any jokes last night. And, come to think of it, while he did hold her in his arms in bed all night, he wasn’t as chatty as usual. They’d normally have a running conversation about whatever was on Netflix in the background, or he’d lull her to sleep by talking about his day or by asking about her schedule for the next morning. He’d promise to take her out over the weekend or mention a restaurant that he wants them to try sometime. He did none of those things last night. She feels so insensitive for not noticing any of this until now.

“Harry?” She pokes her head into his home office and sees him, at his desk, staring mindlessly at the computer screen.

“Hmm?” He whips his head instantly at the mention of his name. She can tell she’s startled him, and the look in his eyes as they lock on hers makes her sad.

“What’s the matter? Are you in any pain?” Harry asks, gesturing for her to come closer.

She smiles, relieved, thinking that he wants her closer so he could hug or kiss her. “I’m not in pain, Harry…”

She leans over his chair, but instead of planting a kiss on her lips, Harry’s moving her around, examining various spots on her body with knitted brows and a critical gaze.

“Wha- what’s happening right now?”

“Jus’ makin’ sure you’re all good.”

“What do you mean-” and then it hits her. “Oh, Harry…” She takes his face in both of her hands and kisses him, deeply, causing his investigative touch to freeze around her body and his eyes to flutter shut instantly.

He’s breathless when she pulls away and he avoids her eyes, looking down at his feet. She stands in the gap between his legs and coaxes him to look at her but Harry buries his face into her torso and wraps his arms around her waist instead. She’s officially alarmed at this point but doesn’t want to say the wrong thing and risk him withdrawing into himself again. He’s been hiding in his office all day and this is their first interaction since last night. So, she runs her hands through his hair and scratches his scalp gently, hearing him hum into her body like a purring cat.

‘Missed you today” she mumbles, kissing his hair. “You’ve been holed up here all day.” She feels Harry stiffened against her. “Hey, what’s the matter?” she peels herself from him and looks down into his eyes.

“Nothin’” he’s barely audible.

“Talk to me” she squats to be at eye level with him.

“I’d really better not.”

“What do you mean? Have I done something wrong?”

“ No! No, no. Of course not. It’s-” Hearing her question Harry’s eyes shoot up to meet her and he grabs her wrist, urgently, for a brief moment before he notices the marks left behind by the restraints he’d tied her in last night and immediately lets go.

Baffled by his hesitation, she loses patience. “It’s what, Harry? What is going on with you?”

“It’s this.” he says, bringing her attention to the cuff marks on her wrists that she hadn’t noticed were there. “I- I can’t touch you. I don’t wanna open my mouth- I’m scared I’ll say the wrong thing and you’ll think I’m a monster! I- fuck, I mean, I did this to you!”

“Harry, I would never think you’re a monster!”

“Why not? Hmm? Why the hell not? I hurt you! Who does that?! Who the fuck gets off on watching someone they love feel pain? It’s-”

“Hey, hey, stop. Look at me. Harry, look at me, please!” She brushes his curls out of his eyes and smiles at him. “I like pain. Okay? I do. I want you to hurt me. I promise. You’re not hurting me when you do these things to me. Not at all! You’re making me very, very happy.”

He’s stunned into silence. 

When she sees, from his eyes, that he’s trying to take her words in, she gives him more. “Do you know how much love and trust I have for you to even let you do that shit to me? I wouldn’t let just anyone tie me up like that, immobilize me, wrap their hands around my neck and fucking choke me, if I didn’t trust that they’d stop when I needed them to. If I didn’t know for a fact that you’d rather cut your hand off before you use it to harm me I wouldn’t let you anywhere near me.” 

Harry was smiling now, blinking back tears, his dimples gradually growing. 

“Yeah?” was all he was able to say without giving away the lump in his throat.

“Mhm.” She went back to running her fingers through her hair as she spoke. “This is just dom-drop. Your brain tricking you.” 

Harry nodded knowingly. 

“We have a safeword, remember? If I really felt hurt, I coulda used it to tap out, right?”

“R-right.” He sniffled.

“And I know that, had I done that, you’d have listened. Honored out agreement and stopped immediately, yeah?”

“O-of course. Would never make you keep going if you didn’t want to.”

“Exactly. And I know that. I promise. I could never imagine a world in which you are anything but attentive and responsible.”

Harry let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding and wiped his tears away with the back of his arm. “I love you.”

“I know. And I love you too. Now come to bed and cuddle me, I’ve been waiting all day.”

#dom!harry #harry styles fluff #harry styles smut #harry styles fanfic #harry styles blurb