#matthias waits on theo a lot because theo doesn't respond quickly and he lets the phone ring and ring before picking up...

[mattodore]

#river dipping #playlist #theodore core #echthroi #oc extras #i've had a really bad day today so obviously my go-to solution for this is to read through theo's questionnaires again #impossible for me to read them w/o crying esp when i get to this question while listening to his playlist... #god... he means the world to me #''the only exception is when he's hurt'' i think i should edit this part to clarify that it has to be..... god. really bad. like horrific. #before he actually goes to matthias outright. most of the time when he's hurt or upset or sick he's not... direct. #instead he seeks matthias out in his head. comforts himself w/ the smell of matthias on his clothes... things he's left in the apartment... #but matthias is always reaching out and trying to check in... and when theo texts back quickly that's when matthias will get this... sense. #and he'll come to theo with his arms open and then theo is breaking down into them. ugh............... #matthias waits on theo a lot because theo doesn't respond quickly and he lets the phone ring and ring before picking up... #theo is just so busy and he has so much going on yk... and matthias has all that free time...... so. #theo getting back to matthias quickly is normally a sign he's not okay....................................... ugh. #i have this like... image in my head of theo on campus just barely holding it together #and then the lecture he's in ends and he stone faces it and walks out... jitters through his hands that he's struggling to hide... #and he's just made it out to the trees when his phone vibrates with a text from matthias #and he grips his phone tighter in his fist and doesn't read it until he gets somewhere more private #and when he checks the message he sends a clipped text in response. maybe only one or two words. something vague. #and that's all it takes for matthias to press call. the only sign he needed. #and at that first ring theo's already dropping to squat down with his chin nearly touching his knees. his bag slipping from his shoulder. #he stares for a beat or two. can't hit answer right away. never can really. and he doesn't even say anything when he picks up. #just. listens to matthias breathe. for a moment they're both quiet. and theo can hear the sound of matthias moving around on the other end #and then matthias uses that gossamer soft tone he takes with him whenever theo's been awake for too long or. god. when theo's been crying. #a simple ''darling...'' and it all just falls apart. and then theo's there crying on campus hiding his face in his knees while matthias #talks all gentle in his ear. talks him through the shakes and the stress... already out the door to go to him... jesus. #god... just... yeah. yeah...... #lays down..................... dies. mattodore...................