#listen. i am from the south. etiquette is so incredibly important to me. it's like one of the first things i build.

[outpost51]

Happy WBW! What are the customs around being invited to someone's house in the world of your WIP? (Is it rude for me to bring a gift? Do I have to take my shoes off before going inside? Things like that!)

NOPAL!!! be normal be normal be normal be normal be norm-- I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED.

[encyclopedia falls through the cut]

ah, shit.

SO, let's go through the aliens i've built so far in Xatal:

**note: these are planetside, traditional living arrangements. when in doubt, ask your host!

Cazen:

Call when you reach the outer bounds of your host's territory -- this is usually marked in some way by a small fence, a garden, or painted rocks. It's polite to announce yourself before the proximity alarm does (so the proximity alarm can be turned off), especially if there are pups napping.

If you're invited over for a meal, make sure your host knows about any special dietary needs before the day of your visit; cazen are accustomed and adapted to living in resource-scarce areas, which means there isn't typically an alternative available, and it's both rude and distressing to invite someone over for a meal and be unable to feed them.

On that note, if you are invited over for a visit, but no meal is mentioned, do not assume you are going to be fed. Resources may be scarce, or as Cazen like to stick with small groups, your host may simply want to catch up for a short period, and then have their house empty of company. You may be asked to stay longer -- there is no social consequence for accepting or turning down this offer.

While not required, if you can spare the credits, you'll get bonus points for asking if your host needs anything from the market/grocer/trader -- even if you're going out of your way to help, it's polite to frame it as if you were "going there anyway."

Uknuks:

Have you been vetted by the patriarch? You're welcome any time. You don't even need to call -- you might not have a "traditional sit-down-and-eat" type of visit, but for an uknuk, spending time together is spending time together. They follow the “friend of my friend is my friend” rule, though, so you may be invited to dinner at a random dwelling. Enjoy!

Bring. A. Gift. It doesn't matter if it's your first time there or your hundredth time. It should be something practical (like tools, nice throw blankets, etc) or food/drinks. Crop seedlings are also accepted, but ask first to make sure they can grow in your hosts' climate, there is room for them in the communal garden, and that they are attractive to local pollinators!! Bonus points for asking what they need, double bonus if you bring something that contributes to the community!

If you're asked to help, you help. The community won't take advantage of someone, and they'll accommodate disabilities and limitations! Usually, if you're taller than 3'... you're on "high" shelf duty.

Don't pick up the uknuks. Don't do it. Unless you're adopted family or a crewmate. And then bully (affectionate) your uknuk "siblings" relentlessly. The kids might try to climb you, though, and in that case, enjoy your armload of fuzzy little babies.

Sodai:

You will be handed the bread vessel. SMASH THE VESSEL. DO IT. There's a round stone on the table. Hold it with both hands, flat side towards the table, and drive it straight down onto the stone. There will be a ruckus. Feel free to scream along.

If you cook bone-in meat close to your visit, save the bones and bring them along! You don't really have to do anything with them either, just shove 'em in a clean bag!

There will probably be fermented meat on the table. You don't have to eat it (you might not even be able to), but try not to make a face.

Post-meal preening and naps are customary! You can turn down the preening, but I guarantee that meal will put you right to sleep!

Ix'ai:

If it's just dinner, you'll be dining out -- research the place you're going to. Follow the dress code, don't over/underdress, look over the menu and have an idea what you're ordering before you go. Your behavior and appearance reflects on your host! No pressure LOL! Forget to look at the menu? Be honest, and ask your host what they recommend 😌 problem solved!

Holiday? Get ready to meet your host's entire family. You will be dubbed gazagaza at the door and held to the same standard as the rest of "the kids." It's fine, you're probably getting a crash course on the ride over -- no, you're not driving yourself there!

Unless asked, don't bring anything but yourself. It implies that the family cannot provide for themselves, and that they're doing so poorly they can't provide for you as well. If asked, it will be a bottle of mid- to top-shelf liquor or a specific wine -- this is for the owner of the house, who your host will introduce you to. This bottle will be opened and served at dinner.

For the love of all that is good and right in the world, do not remove your shoes. Everyone will probably be outside anyway, unless the weather is bad.

Zal:

Ix'ai etiquette on steroids. If you're invited out, you'll be picked up at a specific time (do NOT be late). Ask your host for a meal recommendation and don't offer to pay -- communicate when plans are made that you want to pay for yourself, otherwise just let your buddy spoil you.

If you're invited over, it's a date (romantic or platonic). That's an intimate friends activity! Tell your host they have a beautiful home, remove your shoes if asked (usually dependent on the weather, it's all about keeping the floors clean!), enjoy the tour and the candlelit dinner. It's going to be over the top. Zal like their ceremony!

Don't bring a gift unless you're courting. Bringing a gift is an expression of courting. Yes, even a bag of chips.

As for Other Etiquette:

When visiting someone on a station:

DO ask which dock to use (yes, this goes for public transport as well).

DON'T assume your host is paying for your docking fees or taxi fare, but DO communicate about it ahead of time.

DO offer to bring along a snack or something they can't usually get on the station!

When invited onto someone's ship:

DO greet the captain, if they're not the person who invited you!

DON'T wear strong scents! You're in an enclosed, filtered space!

DON'T bring large gifts, or anything with non-recyclable packaging.

When invited to Eir Terminal, specifically:

If Bax requests your presence, you go right away. You will probably have to wait when you get there, but the important thing is that you are on time.

#listen. i am from the south. etiquette is so incredibly important to me. it's like one of the first things i build. #xatal galaxy #worldbuilding wednesday #once again i have given you an essay