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#i'm just not really interested in things anymore? weird but .. yeah idk๐ญ if i knew what was wrong i would Fix It sndjdndkd mostly i'm just
chrisbangs
ยท
4 months
Text
hello... (and bye ig ๐)
#๐๐ญ hi...
#i haven't come on in about a month and i didn't realize a month passed by like that... i've kinda stopped using any apps on my phone
#i barely even talk to my friends anymore lol ๐ญ
#i just saw my follower count this morning and realized i hit 13k and i was like ๐ฅธ huh...
#uhhhhhhh ๐ญ idk i wanted to say thank you i guess ๐ซ
#i'm done with stayblr and tumblr in general ๐ญ this much has been obvious for a while now... i tried to fit myself back in during 5star but
#i think i realized i've outgrown the vibes here and in online spaces in general... i don't really enjoy it anymore ๐ญ which is weird cause
#i've used tumblr since i was in middle school so ๐ซก end of an era some would say...
#i think it sucks because i don't have the same feelings about this place or skz or anything in my life right now... i tried to ignore it bu
#it's so obvious now that the entirety of december passed without me really talking to a single person / without me using social media /
#without me really doing much except for like homework and assignments lmao
#i think genuinely i've stopped enjoying everything i used to like and i don't know why ๐ญ it hit me the other day bc i don't even enjoy
#pc collecting anymore which is CRAZY considering how much time and money i've put into that hobby so ๐๐ฅธ who knows what goes on
#i haven't consumed any skz content since rockstar dropped ๐ญ and that also feels weird to me... idk... i would say maybe i'm going through a
#depressive episode but i don't really feel how i do then... i think i'm just tired like i always am and that's just how i am now .. i think
#i'm just not really interested in things anymore? weird but .. yeah idk๐ญ if i knew what was wrong i would Fix It sndjdndkd mostly i'm just
#sad because i haven't been talking to friends... i keep ignoring everyone and not replying to any texts from anyone because ????
#i tell myself i will do it later but i know i won't ... idk i genuinely don't know why i'm struggling to talk to ppl anymore ๐ญ i've become
#even more of a reclusive hermit than i already was ๐ and the worst part is i feel normal abt it
#i don't feel /bad/ i just feel guilty that i'm not replying to ppl bc i don't want to hurt ppls feelings... on my end i feel Normal abt it
#like i ??? is it weird that i'm so detached from everything that not even a month ago made me so happy..? that's weird right ๐ญ like idgi
#i don't feel (as) depressed (as i usually do) but clearly ?? smth is wrong ?? like ik i'm not a clingy sentimental person but ? it kinda
#makes me sad wondering if i really don't care abt ppl anymore ... but i think ๐ญ it's also the object permanence issues that come with adhd
#not seeing or talking to the ppl i love . not doing my hobbies or seeing the groups i care abt . makes it easy to not care or forget what
#they make me feel etc etc ... i get it... but idk ๐ญ if that's what this is . well wow it sucks ASS.. cause i feel guilty for not feeling
#anything at all ... ๐ญ idk how to explain that HENSKDNISJS anywayyyy ๐
#i came on cause i wanted to say thank you for 13k followers ๐ญโผ๏ธ and that i probably will not be online anymore unless i really want to say
#this was a really long winded way to say i feel bad but i'm done with stayblr fr ๐๐ฅธ i tried so hard for the last 2 years to make it feel
#like home again but it stopped ages ago so ๐ฅน that's ok.. i still cherish my memories here ๐ซ anyway thanku and sjsjsksksks bye i guess ๐ญ
#who knows maybe i'll enjoy it one day again and come back :') never know what the future holds ๐ซก
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