#i swear the god the amount of fucking scam calls i've been getting is fucking annoying

[astramachina]

Very obvious scammer over the phone: Hello is this *insert my old name here*?

Me: Who's asking?

Scammer: This is *says his name* with *bank I'm not affiliated with*. My employee ID is *insert string of numbers* and I work with *says bank name again*. Can you confirm you are this person?

Me: Oh, yeah, this is kind of awkward but I killed her a couple of months ago and stole her phone so you might want to drop this number from your call list.

Scammer: *is silent for twenty seconds*

Me: Also, if you want to pass off as a real employee calling from this specific bank, you gotta give your social security number along with your ID. It's customary in the US.

Scammer: *is silent for another ten seconds before hanging up*

#i swear the god the amount of fucking scam calls i've been getting is fucking annoying #i'm gonna start getting even more unhinged every time i pick up my phone. #text tag.