#i feel like i went overboard but i'm also crazy proud of myself

[springbender-blog]

RULES: Always post the rules. Answer the questions asked, then write 11 new ones. Tag 11 people to answer your questions, as well as the person who tagged you.

I was tagged to do this FMA-centered tag by both @greedoda and @ladywiltshire, thank you soooooooo much!!

I kinda don’t want to do this twice though, so I’m going to take my favorite 5 questions from each of yours and answer those - I hope that’s okay! There are also two questions you both had that were the same so I’ll do those too - a total of 12! You lucky nuggets.

Okay, so, the questions under a read more!.......I WROTE WAY TOO MUCH and there’s a lot of analysis....I got really really carried away. :B

Greedoda’s questions:

1. Which two characters do you think have the best dynamic in the series?

Personally, I have to say I love Ed and Ling’s dynamic? They make a great team and they’re such dorks! The couple of episodes where they’re stuck together in Gluttony’s stomach are two of my favorite episodes. As well as just, how they go from Ling pissing Ed off monumentally (I mean, he does set his “goons” and/or “lackeys” on Ed during their first meeting XD) to being just the closest bros, looking out for each other to the end (which I guess definitely includes Greed as well)! It’s a dynamic I wish we saw more of in the show, if I’m being totally honest. They’re two of my favorite characters, and all of their interactions were hysterical.

2. Would ed like milkshakes?

Actually I think it’s canon that he does!! During the episode where he’s trying to get Scar’s attention by going around and fixing things with alchemy, he’s shown afterwards drinking a milkshake with Al and laughing about how he’s “pretty sure everyone in Central knows his name by now”.

3. Favorite character development?

SCAR’S. OKAY??? SCAR’S. Don’t even get me started, holy shit. We, as the audience, start by thinking of him as just this cold blooded murderer, then we realize he’s Ishvalan, which gives him motive, but we still don’t particularly like him, you know? But that’s only in episode five! 

Throughout the whole show we learn more and more about him, we watch him falter for killing Ed when he throws himself in front of Winry, remembering his own brother doing that for him. We see him bring along Yoki, for apparently no reason at all?? Like, Yoki just runs after him and he could kill him, especially since Yoki caused him trouble! But, he doesn’t? And then May comes along and you can see him accepting her and starting to care about her and listening to her and making sure she’s safe. You see him fight alongside Ed and Al because he HAS to, You see him bring along Marcoh despite all the things Marcoh had done to his people - despite Marcoh begging him to kill him. You see how Winry’s binding of his wound (though not forgiving him) affects him because he doesn’t think he deserves it. You see how his attitude is changed further by Miles, until, by the end, he’s honestly one of Ed and Al’s strongest allies. He rallies a group of Ishvalans to help during the Promised Day. And then joins Miles in trying to reform Amestrian’s view of his culture - HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE SCAR I DON’T EVEN. !!!!???

4. Favorite villain?

Okay, I’m honestly not sure if Greed counts, so other than him, definitely Envy. I just love that good-for-nothing garbage lizard. *shaking head* They’re so complex!! I think a lot of has to do with their attitude - the sarcasm and condescending yet cheery tone of voice they always sport makes them oddly endearing and funny, despite how much a terrible person they are. And then to find out all of this hides tons of insecurities because they’re jealous of humans. They pretend to be so much and so powerful and unstoppable but they feel like the most inferior worm (and they are - literally). I just...yeah I love their character!

5. What fma merch do you want, or wish existed?

I REALLY WANT AN FMA BLANKET. Like, just something simple, like red with the main crest on it, or something. I know they exist! I also really want a poster!

And now for the Lady’s:

1. Do you remember your first time watching or reading Fullmetal Alchemist? What was your first impression? 

I remember the first time I ever saw it (not watched), I was passing my sister on our home computer. I distinctly remember seeing a young girl in pink with a lot of braids and a tiny panda bear making something glow like blue lighting (*choking noises*) and I asked my sister what it was and she said “Fullmetal Alchemist” and I was like “Oh” and brushed it off because she’d talked about it before but I wasn’t interested? (wtf was my problem??). But maybe a few months later my friend watched it and at that point I just had to. The hype was real when I finally started, and the hype was even bigger for Brotherhood. I remember being halfway through 03 and watching the first FMAB opening and just getting chills, I couldn’t wait to get to it, and boy did it live up to my expectations and more from episode one.

2. Tell me about a scene that really touched your or made you realize something about yourself.

My first thought is immediately the episode “Interlude Party”. I mean, I know that episode is pretty much just a summary of what’s happened so far, but the bits in between with Hohenheim talking to Pinako, to baby Trisha, to especially the part with Hohenheim getting overwhelmed by Father, who stands there laughing at the “puny foolish humans” who live only to die, so they may as well use them - and we can see the shadows of the dancing morphing and turning into something...else - followed by Trisha interrupting this train of thought by that’s what makes humans strong. The fact that we die. The fact that we change. And the fact that that’s what makes us so undefeatable, because we don’t give up. And this is followed up later with Envy being jealous of humans, because of this very same reason - our resilience and determination against all the forces against us, including ourselves. 

And I think that that’s so true. And that gives me strength to keep going.

3. Funniest headcanon you’ve ever seen. Go!

Okay this is definitely a tie. The first is the one where huge rumors sprout up about Ed after the Promised Day and everyone bombarding Fuhrer Mustang about all these far fetched things until Mustang finally says something like “Edward Elric is a 30-something-year-old-man living in Resembool teaching his daughter how to make apple pies” or something like that. The other is the one where Ed is in Xingese history books as “the man who fed the emperor a shoe”, for obvious reasons. That’s just. GREAT.

4. What spurred you to join the fandom?

Actually, it was totally on accident! There was a long, long part of me and my tumblr experience that believed FMAB was NOT my favorite anime. And then I started realizing, I posted a lot of it on my blog? Like, instead of random FMAB between the multifandom mash of cringe and zero tagging systems, it started to become FMA that I saw the most of on my dash and blog. And I realized, like someone had flicked me in the face, that wtf, this show is actually so important to me and where would I be without it??? 

5. Have a fandom meltdown here and tell me why you love your fandom or show/comic so much!

AAAHHH everyone here is SO nice and I’ve managed to keep my dash (mostly) discourse free! Everyone is so supportive of each other and have the same passion as I do for this show. There are SO MANY talented artists, including musical artists, which is amazing, and SO MANY funny things and funny memes that come from this fandom. I’m honestly so glad I’m a part of it, even if I don’t contribute much myself other than screeching in my tags!

And here, the two you both asked!!

1. OTPs! Who are they? Edwin is top of the list!! I’ve shipped them all the way from the beginning, and to see them come together in canon - and in such a NERD WAY - I just love them so much. I also ship Lingfan, Almei, and Royai!

2. Favorite opening/ending number and why?

My favorite opening is Opening 3, Golden Time Lover, for a L O T of reasons. The way it goes from the soft melody in the background to the much harsher tones above just convey all my feelings for it, because this opening is both soft, and rough and to me it just perfectly conveys the stories’ struggle, and the journey forward. The elements of the zooming in and out, the sweeping camera angles, and the sudden changes in the action between teasingly slow and choppily fast. There is SO much contrast in this song, and in the animation to match it. Literally, this opening is a masterpiece and thinking about it makes my heart race.

My favorite ending is Ending 2, Let It All Out. GOD THIS SONG. Wow. It just, tears at my heartstrings a little. A lot. First of all the animation is stunning. Secondly, the lyrics are just, amazing. “There’s no need to pretend you’re so strong” and “Let’s turn our pain and tears into stars”??? Jesus christ, how lovely is that?! And how it changes from half screen to full screen with the climax of the chorus. The emphasis on Ling, Lan Fan, and Fu, and  then on May, as well as Ed and Al and Winry. The way it STARTS with Winry. It just symbolizes strength in such a simple way - through the fear of what living has done, what it could do, and still being able to move forward. It’s a very powerful song to me.

OKAY! And since that took me over an hour to answer (I regret nothing and thank you both so much for giving me the opportunity to gush without restraint...) I’m not going to tag anyone or make new questions myself. Frankly, I’m too tired and my imagination is spent. XD 

I hope you all enjoyed reading this! Thanks again! Love you all!

#i feel like i went overboard but i'm also crazy proud of myself #holy shit #springbenderstuff #greedoda #ladywiltshire #tag things #keep

[kyunsies]

hey mädch! how are you? sorry for taking so long to reply. i got a bit sick from overwork and my whole body kind of shut down? it got to the point where i couldn't eat or sleep and i ended up having panic attacks even just thinking about sleeping... like, no matter how well i was doing i just ended up feeling like i'd failed and idk i think i imploded. that big global launch i told you about reached thousands of people but it was like one of four jobs i'm also doing and with those stats idk i got myself so so pressured to keep it up (i'm really scared it'll end up failing tbh) and i think i went overboard with everything until my body decided stopping was the only way for me to stop - so i ended up having to take a week off to just kind to be healthy and alive?

thank you for being so kind as always, because i took time off i guess i ended up replying to my friends to just apologise for being so absent. i'm sure you understand how when you get overworked you can kind of end up just cutting things off and cutting everyone off and i think that happened with me a lot too? idk i think i just want to find a place that's healthier in general?

how is your job going? is it still going well? i hope you've been able to treat yourself with the money you're making as well what new albums did you buy? what shoes? i'm like you though! i get a bit obsessed with saving and i hate seeing my bank balance get too low as well.

i thought my favourite song was heaven but i'm really loving rotate more and more these days. but then i really like secrets... ah, there's no point picking haha! idk how i feel about eshy still working so much with them though. i'm so excited for their next english record cause aal was so good but... eshy? sigh.

i understand you very much - i was feeling like i deserved to be stressed all the time as well but i think that was me and that was kind of why i ended up a bit dead i think. you are so kind and aware and good and i am sure you will do amazing things. like, the fact you have doubts means that you're aware and considerate, and able to really push yourself as opposed to not thinking. one of my teachers used to say that the fact i was doubting meant that i was able to move up as opposed to just stand still so i believe it is the same for you and i am sure you will be able to do things that you want to do. i mean, you think far too well of me but you are so compassionate that i just think it's impossible for you to now succeed in your field! i had an ex who's dad was big in medicine and he used to say the best people in the field weren't like the most flashy or smart (though you are smart for sure) or academic etc but actually the best with people. so i believe in you!

omg ok that has been a whole ass essay!! ahhhhhhhh (sorry!) but <3 i hope you're super good. love you!!

- 💥

HELLO LOVE !!!!! <3 it's been a little while hasn't it ?? it's okay !!! i know u are heaps busy, i'm just happy when i'm able to finally hear from u again <3

oh god hun are u feeling better at least? u overwork urself so much ;____; you are doing so many amazing things, you will never be anything less than a fantastic person u know that right? i know i can't sit here and tell u otherwise bc i feel like we have similar tendencies, like no matter how hard we work or if we get good results we won't settle for it bc we are always looking at a flaw . but i really am proud of all that u do :( i could only dream to be as hard working at u are , i look up to ur work ethic . i hope the panic attacks have gotten a little better tho bc that's not healthy :( you are doing more than enough :( i am so happy u have decided to take a week off tho love really u deserve it after your hours and hours of hard work ;___; truly!! <3 i think everything will go well bc i know u gave it everything, with your dedication i'm sure the project will be just fine okay?

and pls i totally understand what u mean bub .... when things get a lot or even when things aren't so busy sometimes it's just hard you know? there are still ppl i need to message to make sure they know i think about them all the time but like i said last time i want to make sure that all the responses i give to ppl are genuine and not half-assed so i usually dedicate a message for them when i know i'm in a good headspace to answer ;____; but i don't think theres anything wrong with that :( as long as u eventually get back to ppl who care about u i don't think they care about how long it takes for u to get back to them as long as u do it at some point so they know u are still thinking of them :( ppl know ur busy love (hopefully) and they shouldn't look down on u or think of u badly if they understand ur situation <3

my job is going okay love they're re-organizing all of our files tho and i've just been trying to get everything all nice for them bc we're kinda getting rid of the old system and i want everything to be nice and in it's place before i leave to back to my final year of uni :') i've been making good money for me tho and yesterday i treally treated myself with some much needed nice clothes .... i might have dropped $200 hhh which isn't really much but when i buy clothes i tend to splurge on better quality stuff ,,, it's why i don't buy a lot of clothes in the first place LDKFJ bc i know it's going to be expensive whatever i buy :') i ended up only getting version 2 + 4 of the one of a kind albums !!!!!!!! i think i'll order the other ones later, i didn't think i should spend about $100 in one sitting sdlkfskd it just didn't feel right . and i did end up getting the shoes !! i got some nice white leather platform tennis shoes, i'm very happy about the purchase, i've been wearing them everyday :D we really are the same when it comes to spending money i see HHSDLFJLSKDFJ <3

also u are SO VALID about one of a kind lol in the beginning i was like omg rotate rotate rotate but like i said last time my fav is definitely heaven ;____; it is so dang comforting for me idk what it is but i have deemed it my top 3 emotional support mx songs so for me they are now amen, gravity, and heaven <3 AND OH MY GOD i agree with this so hard ...... i'm actually really excited about what mx has in store next ....... i dislike eshy with every fiber of my being but !!!!!! idk i'm always excited what mx has i really don't even care as long as they give them free range that's all i ask ;____; and i know ppl are concerned about them going overboard with working but ...... if they didn't want to do it they don't have to !!! i think they crave making music and i think the more opportunities they get the happier they are . they only get this life once u know !!! why not make the absolute most of it <3 just without eshy lol

and lastly ....... this last part got me right here ;_____; how are u so understanding ...... u know exactly what to say all the time :( i've really have been dreading this last year of uni, i don't feel like i'm ready for this . i'm scared to look for a job, i'm scared no one will want me, i'm scared that i won't be able to work int he NICU like how i want to ;____; i'm scared i'm going to screw everything up . i just want to be a good nurse, i want to finally have some confidence in what i do :( i always get so anxious about this stuff, i have so many classmates telling me just to calm down and that i worry too much so i often think something is wrong with me ..... but i worry bc i care about what i do and i want to do it correctly .. i don't know how to say this but u have given me so much comfort just reading this :( i put u in such high regard bc u work really hard and i can tell u are good at what u do for work !! it's crazy that YOU think I am something to be proud of when u are already out there in the working world, being a really damn good adult and being responsible when i'm just me being so insecure about everything i do and i'm not even graduated yet . i just blows my mind u think of me this way and that in it of itself is just ........................ u are so kind ;____; i hope u realize how good of a person u are and you are just one of those ppl i don't even hav to meet and i just naturally look up to u :( so thank u so much .... i really hope u are able to take care of yourself on this break . and remember i am here any time okay !!!!! no matter how many days pass i am always here happy to hear from u okay?? pls take care, i love u angel !!!!!!!! <3

#asks #💥 anon #us <3 the essay ppl on this site <3 #i was so happy when i say this in my inbox babe !!!! ty for coming here and stopping by #i love u so much :( u are so sweet and kind and comforting #i hope u are doing well always !! i think about how u are doing often bubbie <3