#i can't even take him on walks bc after five mins he gets overwhelmed and really anxious and nervous and it's driving me crazy

[simonghostrileys]

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#liliana talks #the thoughts to simply off myself are really strong tonight #nothing in my life comes out the way i'd like to #not even my dog's behaviour #i can't even take him on walks bc after five mins he gets overwhelmed and really anxious and nervous and it's driving me crazy #i can't get him to focus on my and he just pulls and pulls and wants to run off #i can't enjoy walks and i can't take him anywhere #today's walk got super frustrating and everyone kept asking me if they could pet him and told everyone no #i even snapped at this little girl bc i just reached my limit and had too much #i know it was wrong of me and i wish i could apologize to this little girl bc i just feel so bad rn #on top of that i'm gonna turn 28 soon and i haven't accomplished anything in my life #i'm a fucking failure. i can never accomplish shit and whenever i rarely get anything i dreamed of it comes out fucked up like my dog #i hate everything and i hate my life and myself and i have no luck at anything whatsoever #like what was the fucking point on bringing me to this world?? so i could have a miserable life?? to never accomplish anything?? #to lack on all aspects of myself and my life?? see everyone around me get things and never have difficulties on anything??? #not even on their dogs' behaviour?? see how they can take them everywhere and not get overwhelmed?? while mine is a fucking mess?? #i don't even have money to buy him a fucking toy!!! how fucking miserable is that??? #my sister had to give me money to buy him a harness bc i have shit for money #i've been trying for how long god knows to get a job in this place and plot twist... i haven't got any #i just want to die it would be way easier but i'm a fucking coward to even do that. i'm so fucking pathetic jfc #suicide mention tw