#gay as in 'queer expectations for future dating' which was a very aspec INCLUSIVE experience

[omegasmileyface]

im slowly becoming more certain that ive lived an aromantic or aspec experience but im starting to think my experience was VERY much not the norm for those

#i feel like ive rarely had romance pushed onto me. ive been flirted with for usually a day or a couple days which felt so bad but its #over quickly. there was no background pressure for a relationship. i was never grilled or pressured by my family #in school my best friend was a boy which got me some 'oh they must be dating' but (a) nobody gave a shit about me enough to push lol #and (b) you can only consistently have guy friends for so long in a small school before people just get used to it #i feel like dating in high school wasnt really a thing. and i could be wrong but if ir was a thing it was a thing the same as having your #own car and playing varsity sports and doing spirit week etc etc. that was a world so outside mine it genuinely felt like there was no #crossover. we were a gay friend group but we were HIGH SCHOOLERS in the middle of nowhere. we werent gay as in 'dating queerly' we were #gay as in 'queer expectations for future dating' which was a very aspec INCLUSIVE experience #its very likely that the only reason i didnt experience this constant overwhelming pressure to conform that i hear from other aros is just #because im not very observant of emotions. im an autistic outcast who only cared about dating as a concept not a reality yknow? you would #have probably had to say it directly to my face if you wanted me to think you thought i was supposed to be in a relationship #i was just chillin. i dunno. anyway all this is to say i fuckin love valentines day #its a family holiday to me :)