#for perspective at their wedding my brother and his wife told alex to keep her high heels on

[mermaidsirennikita]

books (in the time of corona)

PART I: ADULT EDITION

Let’s get real--we’re all going fucking insane.  

Therefore, I’m recommending some books with which you can kill time.  I’m breaking them into categories--the romance category including several subgenres but by and large covering books that focus more heavily on the romance than anything else.  These will all be adult books; I’m doing a separate page for YA recommendations.

I’ll be adding to this list as I finish books that I feel belong here.

ROMANCE

A Knight in Shining Armor by Jude Deveraux.  A young woman is abandoned by her scoundrel of a boyfriend, only to find a literal medieval knight in shining armor.  Pure 80′s cheese, a classic in the time travel subgenre long before Outlander ever happened.

The Circle Trilogy by Nora Roberts.  Six sexy people, three men and three women in Roberts fashion, travel across time and parallel dimensions to fight an evil vampire and her undead army.  Come for three fun romances, stay in particular for the “virgin bookworm queen captures the heart of the formerly evil 1,000 Irish vampire” ship.

The Hating Game by Sally Thorne.  Rival coworkers who’ve always hated each other compete for the same job--until maybe?  They start?  Hooking up?

From Lukov with Love by Mariana Zapata.  A down on her luck singles figure skater pairs up with the pairs champion she’s always despised... Unless they in fact, in a STUNNING TWIST, do not hate each other?

Pestilence by Laura Thalassa.  A BIT ON THE NOSE RIGHT NOW, but I promise that this tale of a hot virgin Horseman of the Apocalypse spreading his plague and the one woman brave enough to fuck him is WORTH IT.  As is the sequel, War.

My Lady’s Choosing by Kitty Curran.  A literal choose your own adventure novel, but the adventures bodice ripping Regency romance plots!!!

The Kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang.  A sweet and smart woman on the autism spectrum hires a male escort to teach her to be good at sex.  Shit goes DOWN from there.

The Flatshare by Beth O’Leary.  She works days; he works nights.  She needs a cheap place to stay, and he needs a roommate.  So they share a flat and even a bed (sleeping on opposite sides and never at the same time) only communicating through post-it notes throughout the apartment.  What could go wrong?

Marriage for One by Ella Maise.  She can only get her inheritance if she’s married.  Good thing a glacial attorney has offered to marry her out of nowhere, only for paper purposes.  What could go wrong???

The Worst Best Man by Mia Sosa.  Lina is a wedding planner who was left at the altar.  Max is the younger brother of the man who left her, and apparently convinced him to do the leaving.  What happens when they work together?

Get A Life, Chloe Brown by Talia Hibbert.  Chloe suffers from a chronic illness, which means that she’s never had a life--and so she compiles a list that will help her get one.  On the list?  Meaningless sex.  Which she won’t have with her building’s superintendent, even though he’s really down to help her cross off all the other items, riiiight?

HISTORICAL FICTION

Passion by Jude Morgan.  The dramatic and intense height of Romantic England, told from the perspectives of Caroline Lamb, mistress of Lord Byron; August Leigh, his sister and lover; Mary Shelley; and Fanny Brawne, fiancee of John Keats.

Girl with a Pearl Earring by Tracy Chevalier.  Impoverished Griet becomes a maid in the household of the painter Vermeer, becoming his muse after he realizes that she has a natural eye--much to the dismay of his wife.

Snow Flower and The Secret Fan by Lisa See. In nineteenth century China, best friends Lily and Snow Flower follow each other through emotional and cultural revolutions, communicating through the secret language of fans.

The Memoirs of Cleopatra by Margaret George.  Cleopatra recounts her life story, from her earliest memory, through her affairs with Caesar and Antony, and her end.

Mistress of Rome by Kate Quinn.  In Domitian’s Rome, a Jewish girl rises from the position of lady’s slave to the emperor’s mistress through wiles and scheming.

The Tiger Queens by Stephanie Thornton.  The rise and fall of Genghis Khan’s empire, as told through the women of his family--from his favorite wife to a clever daughter-in-law.

At the Water’s Edge by Sara Gruen.  A socialite follows her incompetent to Scotland as he struggles to find the Loch Ness Monster and redeem his ancestor’s name--finding herself and questioning her life in the process.

A Year of Ravens.  A collection of short stories by different authors, all centering on Boudica’s rebellion through the eyes of her countrymen and her enemies.

Feast of Sorrow by Crystal King.  A slave becomes a chef in the treacherous household of a social climber struggling to gain the favor or Caesar August.

Fatal Throne.  Six authors tell the stories of Henry VIII’s wives, all from their differing perspectives.

Daisy Jones and The Six by Taylor Jenkins Reid.  The rise and fall of a 1970s rock band is charted through the recollections of its members--as they recall what drove them apart, and in particular the intense relationship between the leader singers.

THRILLERS

The Girl in 6E by A.R. Torre.  A woman with murderous impulses locks herself in her apartment to keep the public safe, making a living as a camgirl.  She’s left torn between morals and impulse when she begins to suspect that one of her “fans” is dangerous.

Little Deaths by Emma Flint.  In 1960s America, a single mother finds her personal life and image called into question when she’s accused of murdering her two young children.

My Sister, The Serial Killer by Oyinkan Braithwaite.  A nurse covers up her beautiful sister’s murders, only to be caught between loyalties when the doctor she loves falls for said sister.

The Last Mrs. Parrish by Liv Constantine.  A plain “nobody” transforms herself in order to steal a high society housewife’s husband, only to deal with more than she bargained for.

The Wife Between Us by Greer Hendricks and Sarah Pekkanen.  A woman obsesses over her ex-husband’s new fiancee, leading her to disturbing lengths.

The Other Woman by Sandie Jones.  After meeting her ideal man, a woman must contend with his possessive mother, who will do anything to maintain her hold over him.

Something in the Water by Catherine Steadman.  A couple on their dream honeymoon find something in the water that will change the course of their life together.

The Au Pair by Emma Rous.  The day Seraphine and her twin brother were born, their mother flung herself off a cliff and their nanny disappeared.  Decades later, Seraphine discovers a photo taken of her parents just before her mother’s death--with only one baby.  The only person who holds the key to the mystery?  The au pair.

My Lovely Wife by Samantha Downing.  A couple keeps the spark alive through murder.

Lock Every Door by Riley Sager.  A young woman takes a job apartment-sitting in a high-end Manhattan building.  Shortly after she befriends another sitter, the girl goes missing--with everyone else acting like nothing is amiss.

The Wives by Tarryn Fisher.  Thursday is one of her husband’s three wives, though she’s never met the other two.  When she finally does meet the third wife, she discovers a woman far different from what she expected--and covered in bruises.

FANTASY/SUPERNATURAL/HORROR

Daughter of the Forest by Juliet Marillier.  Sorcha is the youngest of seven children in medieval Ireland.  When her stepmother curses her six older brothers to live as swans, Sorcha agrees to weave them shirts of painful thistles, all the while remaining silent, to break the spell.

Black Pearls by Louise Hawes.  A collection of dark fairy tale retellings.

The Incarnations by Susan Barker.  A man receives letters from an anonymous source, detailing his supposed past lives throughout historical China.

Girls Made of Snow and Glass by Melissa Bashardoust.  A dark Snow White retelling, with a stepmother whose goals extend far beyond the princess.

Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo.  Alex Stern is discovered as the sole survivor of a brutal multiple murder, and is promptly scooped up by a group charged with monitoring the occult societies at Yale.  Now disguised as a university student, Alex must figure out who’s been murdering locals, while also hiding what happened the night she lived.

The Silent Companions by Laura Purcell.  A young widow in Victorian England is sent to her husband’s country estate to wait out her pregnancy, and is not alarmed to discover a “silent companion” (a painted wooden figure) in the house.  But when the figure’s eyes begin following her, she is sucked into a history beyond her imagination.

Circe by Madeline Miller.  The story of the woman who would seduce Odysseus, from her beginnings as a plain witch born of Helios and a mother who couldn’t care less.  A classic rise to power story.

CONTEMPORARY LIT

Erotic Stories for Punjabi Widows by Balli Kaur Jaswal.  Down on her luck Nikki takes up a job as a creative writing class instructor for the Punjabi widows in her West London neighborhood.  It turns out that the widows thought she was there to teach them to write in English--which leads to the class becoming a place for them to share their stories orally instead.  And it turns out that they’re a bit... erotic.

An American Marriage by Tayari Jones.  Upwardly mobile newlyweds Celestina and Roy have their lives upended when Roy is falsely accused of a terrible crime and sent to prison for twelve years.  When he’s released early after five, he returns home to find that Celestina has changed completely, and their marriage is entirely unknown.

Stay With Me by Ayobami Adebayo.  A young Nigerian couple has always been against polygamy; but after the wife fails to get pregnant, her in-laws show up on their doorstep with a second wife.

NON-FICTION/MEMOIR

Harem: The World Behind The Veil by Alev Lytle Croutier.  An examination of the Ottoman Empire’s harem culture, focusing on the women within.

Love For Sale: A World History of Prostitution by Nils Johan Ringal.  Not really a GLOBAL history of prostitution, but a good introduction starting with ancient times and going into the cases of more recent madams in America, with a strong case for legalization worldwide.

Georgiana: Duchess of Devonshire by Amanda Foreman.  A readable biography of the famously scandalous and tragic duchess, to be read while you kill time rewatching “The Duchess” starring Keira Knightley.

Lucrezia Borgia: Life, Love, and Death in Renaissance Italy by Sarah Bradford.  A fair but none-too-precious assessment of one of Renaissance Italy’s most controversial women, and an analysis of her relationships with her father and brother.

The Life and Death of Anne Boleyn by Eric Ives.  While you’re quarantining, you might as well read the definitive Anne Boleyn biography, yes?  This one is responsible for much of the modern attitude on Anne.

Queen of Fashion: What Marie Antoinette Wore to the Revolution by Caroline Weber.  A fascinating analysis of Marie Antoinette’s political life through her clothes.

The Monster of Florence by Douglas Preston and Mario Spezi.  An analysis of the infamous, unsolved “Monster of Florence” case.  One of the most gruesome serial killers in Italy’s history, the monster’s crimes were pinned on several different men, and even investigated by the prosecutor who botched the Amanda Knox case.

The Forger’s Spell: A True Story of Vermeer, Nazis, and the Greatest Art Hoax of the Twentieth Century by Edward Dolnick.  An examination of the case of Han van Meegeren, a painter who forged and sold many Dutch master fakes, and the pretentious art world that let him get away with it for years.

The Secret History of the Mongol Queens: How the Daughters of Genghis Khan Rescued His Empire by Jack Weatherford.  A study of the women in Genghis Khan’s family, and in particular those that kept his empire from falling to ruin after his death.  A good companion read with Stephanie Thornton’s fiction novel Tiger Queens mentioned above.

Chasing Aphrodite: The Hunt for Looted Antiquities at the World’s Richest Museum by Jason Felch and Ralph Frammolino.  How did the Getty Museum end up with so many stolen artifacts?  This book aims to find out.

The Creation of Anne Boleyn by Susan Bordo.  A different kind of Anne Boleyn book, studying her portrayal in culture and fiction--complete with input from Natalie Dormer following her portrayal of Anne Boleyn on The Tudors.

Blood Sisters: The Women Behind the Wars of the Roses by Sarah Gristwood.  An examination of the women of the houses of Lancaster and York during their famous, long-running conflict--and how these women had an impact on battles and politics alike.

The Dragon Behind the Glass: A True Story of Power, Obsession, and the World’s Most Coveted Fish by Emily Voigt.  The author delves into why people are so obsessed with the arowana, a rare and exotic fish, to the point that they’ll commit murder--and becomes wrapped up in the fascination herself.

The Rules Do Not Apply by Ariel Levy.  Over the course of a month, Ariel Levy watches everything she held true in her life--her financial security, her career, her marriage, and her pregnancy--fall apart.  Levy must confront what it means to live an “unconventional” and “free” life, only for that to become meaningless, and pick up the pieces.

From Here to Eternity: Traveling the World to find The Good Death by Caitlin Doughty.  Doughty recounts her global travels to observe and study different funerary and death rituals, recounting and analyzing her experiences with respect and personality.

Lady Killers: Deadly Women Throughout History by Tori Telfer.  A collection of female serial killers, analyzing why they did what they did and the cultural legacy they left behind.

Severed: A History of Heads Lost and Heads Found by Frances Larson.  A history of decapitated human heads, and what different cultures have done with them.

From Scratch: A Memoir of Love, Sicily, and Finding Home by Tembi Locke.  Tembi Locke was never truly accepted by her husband’s Sicilian family, as a black American woman.  But when Saro dies young of cancer, she finds herself more deeply entwined her in-laws, as she works to pick up the pieces.  (Warning: one of the most achingly romantic books I’ve ever read; but it will destroy you.)

#books #book recommendations #book recs #self reblog for new addition

[hissyreviews]

October Reads

October is the month of spooks. So it makes sense that this is the month of the spooky books. This will be the same format as last month. There will be the book’s synopsis, my quick thoughts (though no one can say that they are intelligent), then my arbitrary ranking of the book. Under the read more!

Horns by Joe Hill

Merrin Williams is dead, slaughtered under inexplicable circumstances, leaving her beloved boyfriend Ignatius Perrish as the only suspect. On the first anniversary of Merrin’s muder, Ig spends the night drunk and doin awful things. When he wakes the next morning he has a thunderous hangover. . . and horns growing from his temples. Ig possesses a terrible new power to go with his terrible new look - a macabre gift he intends to use to find the monster who killed his one true love. Being good and praying for the best got him nowhere. Now it’s time for revenge. . . It’s time the devil had his due.

Thoughts: Alright, let’s discuss how great this book is. I truly believe that Joe Hill is one of the eminent horror writers of our time. I think he is just as good as Stephen King, although I like him more. There is less meandering in writing, it is tight and the story is devilishly good. I really like how it goes about the powers that Ig gains. It makes logical sense. But I truly hate Ig’s name. It’s fucking stupid. Ignatius bitch, his brother’s name is Terry! His parents were punishing him.

Rating: 8/10 would recommend

Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

On a warm summer morning in North Carthage, Missouri is is Nick and Amy Dunne’s fifth wedding anniversary. Presents are being wrapped and plans are being made when Nick’s clever and beautiful wife disappears. As the police begin to investigate, the town golden boy parades a series of lies, deceits, and inappropriate behavior. Nick is oddly evasive, and he’s definitely bitter - but is he really a killer.

Thoughts: This book really makes me think about the movie. I knew that Flynn had written the screenplay for the movie but she puts everything into it. I have never said this before but if you have watched the movie you wouldn’t need to read this book. If you read this book, then you know every move in the movie. There are more diary entries, more inner monologues, but you know what pick one or the other or both. You’ll know the whole story no matter which you pick.

Rating: 9/10 would definitely recommend either movie or book

The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson

First published in 1959, Shirley Jackson’s The Haunting of Hill House has been hailed as a perfect work of unnerving terror. It is the story of four seekers who arrive at a notoriously ufriendly pile called Hill House: Dr. Montague, an occult scholar looking for solid evidence of a haunting; Theodora, his light hearted assistant; Eleanor, a friendless, fragile young woman well acquainted with poltergeist; and Luke, the future heir of Hill House. At first, their stay seems destined to be merely a chilling encounter with inexplicable phenomena. But Hill House is gathering its powers - and soon it will choose one of them to make its own.

Thoughts: This novel is the quintessential haunted house novel. I really believe that it is the heavy hitter in the genre. I loved the characterizations in here and the setting was foreboding. Hill House echoes in the mind. You can feel it emanating from the pages as you read. If you like ghost stories you need to read this classic.

Rating: 9/10 buy it for your bookshelf

Beastly by Alex Flinn

I am a beast. A beast. Not quite wolf or gorilla or dog, but a horrible new creature with fangs, claws, and hair springing from every pore. I am a walking monster. You think I’m talkign fairy tales? No way. The place is New York City. The time is now. And I’ll stay this way forever - unless I can break the spell. Yes, the spell, the one the witch in my English class cast on me. Why did she turn me into a beast who hides by day and prowls by night? I’ll tell you how I used to be Kyle Kingsbury, the guy you wished you were, with money, perfect looks, the perfect girl, and the perfect life. And then, I’ll tell you how I became perfectly . . . beastly

Thoughts: Yawn. I wanted something to lighten up my October and this was only an hour and a half read. I think it would be more interesting if I had read it when I was the target demographic. There are some cute things: the chat room for cursed individuals. Great idea! How Kyle looked? Cool deal. The fact that he still needs to find someone to love and stuff. Meh.

Rating: 3/10 get it for a kid who likes fairy tales. They’ll probably enjoy it.

Room by Emma Donoghue

To five-year-old Jack, Room is the world. It’s where he was born, it’s where he and his Ma eat and sleep and play and learn. At night, Ma shuts his safely in the wardrobe, where Jack is meant to be asleep when Old Nick visits. Room is home to Jack, but to Ma it’s the prison where she has been held for seven years. Through her fierce love for her son, she has created a life for him in this eleven-by-eleven- foot space. But Jack’s curiosity is building alongside Ma’s own desperation - and she knows that Room cannot contain either much longer. Room is a tale at once shocking, riveting, exhilarating - a story of unconquerable love in harrowing circumstances, and of the diamond-hard bond between a mother and her child.

Thoughts: This is a very rough book to read. It is told from Jack’s perspective. And it really shows you how the a child doesn’t see anything wrong with being confined to a small space. The book is divided in such a way as to feel like two different stories. Them in the room and their lives post-Room. Neither are easy. The novel was written in 2010 a year after Jaycee Dugard was rescued from her abductors with her two daughters fathered by the man. Six years later Rosalynn McGinnis was rescued after being held captive for twenty years with her nine children fathered by her abductor. Room is fictional but the cases that inspired it, the cases that are still being solved that are almost beat by beat identical to the story are very real.

Rating: 6/10 didn’t truly enjoy because it is a rough read. Very very rough. Will make you think about the women who have suffered this travesty.

Hidden Bodies by Caroline Kepnes

Joe Goldberg is no stranger to hiding bodies. In the past ten years, this thritysomething has buried four of them, collateral damage in his quest for love. Now he’s heading west to Los Angeles, the city of second chances, determined to put his past behind him. In Hollywood, Joe blends in effortlessly with his fellow young upstarts. He eats guac, works in a bookstore, and flirts with a journalist neighbor. But while others seem fixated on their own reflections, Joe can’t stop looking over his shoulder. The problem with hidden bodies is that they don’t always stay that way. They reemerge, like dark thoughts, multiplying and threatening to destroy what Joe wants most: true love. And when he finds it in a darkened room in a Soho House, he’s more desperate than ever to keep his secrets buried. He doesn’t want to hurt his new girlfriend - he wants to be with her forever. But if she ever finds out what he’s done, he may not have a choice. . .

Thoughts: Dude, this is just as creepy as You and it pops off much quicker. Like damn Joe pop a chill pill. Leave the peeps alone you crazy stalker. If you liked You you will like this book. It is a solid sequel. I just gotta say that ending?! What the hell Kepnes!?! Can a gal get a satisfying conclusion to the story where she’s been begging for the cops to arrest our lovely protagonist the entire time. Damn girl!

Rating: 8/10 would recommend. Very creepy.

The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks

Don’t be carefree and foolish with your most precious asset - life. This book is your key to survival against the hordes of undead who may be stalking you right now without your even knowing it. The Zombie Survival Guide offers complete protection through trusted, proven tips for safeguarding yourself and your loved ones against the living dead. It is a book that can save your life.

Thoughts: Bitch what can I say? It was October. I wanted to read some kitschy shit. Mmkay?

Rating: 5/10 Fun but not serious in any way, shape, or form.

The Magicians by Lev Grossman

Quentin Coldwater is brilliant but miserable A high school math genius, he’s secretly fascinated with a series of children’s fantasy novels set in a magical land called Fillory, and real life is disappointing by comparison. When Quentin is unexpectedly admitted to an elite, secret college of magic, it looks like his wildest dreams may have come true. But his newfound powers lead him down a rabbit hole of hedonism and disillusionment, and ultimately to the dark secret behind the story of Fillory. The land of his childhood fantasies turns out to be much darker and more dangerous than he ever could have imagined. . . .

Thoughts: This is like Harry Potter if they went to an after high school secondary education. Hello wizard college. Speaking of, why isn’t there a wizard college or university in Harry Potter? I mean no one tell JK she’ll fuck it up but really? I’m just saying. Very fun, moves quickly. Also goes over how just because you get what you want doesn’t mean you’ll be happy. Like dude can control magic and he’s still not happy. Some people just need some anti-depressants man.

Rating: 9/10 would definitely recommend

Ghost Hunters by Deborah Blum

At the close of the nineteenth century, as Darwin’s theory of evolution gave birth to a golden age of rationalism, a small group of scientists launched a determined investigation into “unexplainable” incidences of clairvoyance and ghostly visitations. Led by William James, the renowned philosopher and professor of psychiatry at Harvard, they staked their reputations, their careers, even their sanity on one of the most extraordinary psychological quests ever undertaken: to empirically prove the existence of ghosts, spirits, and psychic phenomena. What they pursued -- and what they found -- raises questions as fascinating today as they were then.

Thoughts: This is in the same vein as Mary Roach’s Spook. It is a historical search into some of the first scientific expeditions into the afterlife. And you know what? That’s what science is about. Looking into a subject to gain empirical evidence that could revolutionize the world? What actual scientist would not jump at the chance? Man, I read it and was just like, wow, scientist can be really fucking stupid. Just perform some experiments champ. Stop being a stubborn close-minded bitch. You know those people who are like “we just cease to exist when we die” and those who are like “you have a soul and you have to follow my religion or you will burn in hell when you die” both are close-minded twat waffles.

Thoughts: 8/10 would recommend to a scientist so they can see how fucking rude their fields were to those attempting to use science to explain the metaphysical world.

Red Dragon by Thomas Harris

Will Graham has a fearful gift - a taletn for the pursuit of human monsters. He has caught two mass murderers in his FBI career. Now he must hunt again. A ritual murderer has struck twice, killing entire families in two South-eastern cities. Graham must find him before the moon is full again or another family will die. Graham’s keen empathy permits him - sometimes forces him - to see the crimes from some haunting points of view. This ability and his forensic skills make him the prime threat to the murderer. The killer, Francis Dolarhyde, is a terrible accident of nature, shaped by his early life into a monster. He’s trying to work things out, though. So far his efforts have cost ten lives. He intends to do something about that. In a chilling race against time, Graham searches desperately after Dolarhyde, always conscious that he and the killer are, at some fundamental level, alike. And in one terrifying respect he is right. Like him, the murderer is a ruthless hunter, already beginning his search for Will Graham.

Thoughts: First, the synopsis gives the entire story away. And to be honest I enjoyed this book however, I love my girl Clarice so much more. Would it be different if I had read this first? Maybe. Dolarhyde has sections in this book that are my favorite parts. They are messed up but the glimpses into that mind are fascinating. An enjoyable read.

Rating: 8/10 would recommend you read before Silence of the Lambs cause you will like that one more but this one deserves a read

#books #literature #review #hissy reviews #end of the month #joe hill #gillian flynn #caroline kepnes #thomas harris #bookblr