#feeling extra parasocial tonight... i just Miss him

[hicyj]

some thoughts about the concert before my adrenaline slips away!

so this was the first time since january of 2017 that i was able to snag a very close spot! the previous 4 times that i was close, i was always on the very right so i always got a ton of my maknaes but for this concert, my friend and iwere on the left, AND GUESS WHO IS ON THE LEFT?? YOUNGJAEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! i guess he was our designated spot cause he was in front of us soo much i still can't believe it!!!!!!!!!!! and jb was hella close too which on a normal day would kill me BUT YOUNGJAE!!!!!!!!! i did miss seeing my maknaes have fun in front of me but after 3 years i finally got my top two!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! jinyoung always casually walked right past us but that's fine.. prob would've died if he danced in front of me. he looked SOOOOOOOOOOO GOOD with his permed hair and tanned self. everytime he brushed his hair back with his head i was like.. lemme brush it for u boo (i consistently swerve into jinyoung's lane at concerts. CONSISTENTLY.) we also had a bit of markson on our side! more so mark than jackson but i'm glad they came close a few times so we could see that muscle definition! protein mark was out in full force!

the crowd: initially a lot more subdued than the brooklyn concert but right around when the concert started transitioning from its insecurity theme to its security theme, the crowd livened up dramatically! i mentioned it but it really felt like 'just right' was the point that happened!

the performances: honestly maybe the best i've ever seen from them!? they were very sharp, rarely blocking the moves and even with a really long setlist of perf heavy songs they killed it! their energy as usual was infectious and i'm so glad they kept it up and gave us like 3 encores ;_; consummate performers!!! my favorite overall performances- 

just right - i was IN SHOCK that they did it and so i was v excited to see it after 3 years  

save you - i LOOOOOOVE this song and the choreo was excellent. when i realized it was going to be jb that'd be closest to us for the solo dance i literally had a kai/artificial love flashback and yelled an "OH NOOO" that was filled with both anticipation and dread bc i wasn't sure if i'd survive BUT I DID!

page - I LOVE THE CHOREO TO THIS SONG!!!!! i hope in the future they add it as an encore song so they can just run around and scream jackson's refrain with us!

come on - again REALLY fun choreo and they balanced having fun with being sharp with their moves!

teenager - honestly i just remember thinking they were just really hot lol. full on thirst mode lol

paradise - a fan favorite, i saw their backs for most of this one but still had fun screaming along!

hard carry remix - can't deny the power of this song on the audience!! it was def one of the energy peaks of the show!

one degree & sign were both unbelievable because of how good their vocals were. obviously have youngjae vision but he was PARTICULARLY excellent, jjp too!! the intensity of jaebeom's gaze during one degree was a LOT for me. it was what we would call smoldering lol

thank you & miracle were very sweet. i am normally completely unaffected by these songs but i surprised myself with the little well of love that was bubbling up in me during both of those songs!

fanservice wise (i can't guarantee these were directed to me so i'll just say these were all directed towards my general area.. it's only the last one that i'm absolutely sure was directed to me lol)

i don't really call to the members but jb was extra interactive with the audience tonight so i have a lot of fun clips of him on my phone.. i think we made eye contact quite a few times but again...you never know with the lights and stuff who they're actually looking at. he was really in it to win it with his cutie/sexy duality.

mark gave his trademark flirty grin and i'm always amazed how quickly he goes from cute!!! to HOT!!!!!! in person. it's different from jb cause mark stares u the hell down lol.

youngjae's transparent back of his shirt was a major plus.. esp cause that's all i saw when they moved to the extended stage

youngjae ALSO sprayed us with water and you can literally hear me screaming "OH NO!!!" right before he did it lmfaooooooooooo. but i saw the light and now realize it was Blessed water

HE ALSO DANCED IN FRONT OF US, GAVE ME A HEART, AND I JUST SCREAMED, DUCKED MY HEAD, AND FORGOT TO RETURN IT LMFAO.

ments thoughts:

when bambam bullied jb into choosing between jjp and jus2!!!! i thought bam wouldn't survive the rest of the night (LOL) but we chanted jb's name when everyone paired up without him and he was fine

speaking of pairing up...

jackjae.... are everything..............................

jjp and 2young were hella cute too!!

yugbam weren't close enough to me for me to see any moments but i look forward to watching every clip of this concert ever to find it

bambam was having the time of his life during this concert.. all his ments ("HEYYY LADIES") were hilarious and the security guards were all his fans by the end of the concert. his remixes of never ever and ssi were amazing!!

ALL THE MEMBERS' MENTS WERE IN ENGLISH!!! youngjae was visibly nervous bc he was right after jinyoung but he did SO well. i'm so grateful they took the time to learn and practice it. jinyoung said so himself by stating that he wanted to get better w/ english in order to expand globally and communicate more with us. it’s a pragmatic approach from a pragmatic individual but my immense appreciation is there nonetheless!!

jackson seemed particularly filled with emotion during the last ment. when said his "respect everyone, fear no one" line i was like AYYY YESS but at the same time i was like.. is that from a rick ross track???? lmao. he keeps saying he'll work harder and you know what- it's really paying off. his feature on rumble was by FAR the best he's ever sounded. keep working (as a solo artist and within your group!!) and we'll support you as gently and as constructively as possible!

they kept promising they'd be back next year and i would love for that to happen but i really hope they announce it farther in advance so that we can get filled venues!!!!!

there's more but i haven't rewatched the ments so i may edit this later!

other thoughts:

the unit stages were fun - nearly blacked out during youngjae's but of course i have ZERO audio for it cause of my ridic phone. 

amerithaikong went hard with the autotune but it's usually the most lit (i aged 30 years typing that) part of the concert lol 

sharpest choreo award definitely goes to i am me! they were ON IT!

the last chorus of eclipse when they're on their knees had me really emotional ughhhh. i could feel them putting everything into that move.

THE DENIM OUTFITS!!!! I CAN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE ULTIMATE BOYFRIEND LOOK I LITERALLY ASCENDED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (when u know parasocial relationships can only be reasonably healthy if you keep your distance but then they GO AND WEAR BOYFRIEND LOOKS WHAT ARE U SUPPOSED TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

SO MANY ENCORES!!!!!! gotta be honest i think shopping mall is the antithesis of everything i love so when they were like- ANOTHER SONG?? i was like YESSSSS!!! but then bam said shopping mall and i was like damn ok.... i guess!!!!! LOL. but we got fly remix (which was awesome!!!), go higher, and a repeat of come on!!

i'm just so happy and so grateful (the word of the day!!) to have seen them again so close. i won't forget this experience <33

#add save you and page to the soundtrack of MY life #prob thirsty by taemin too for obvs reasons