#eh at least i never posted it anywhere so i can't disappoint anyone which is very good

[sunrise-on-the-shore]

i remember when i had fun writing. wild times.

#sunrise thoughts #like. wow. #like. i used to love it so much #i would write every day everywhere #i always had something to write about whether it was miserable poetry or drabbles of my blorbos (ocs or fandom related) #it was really fun and uhh.. well now... #i get so frustrated with my word choices and my ideas and the way i write characters and i don't have the energy to even try to write #eh at least i never posted it anywhere so i can't disappoint anyone which is very good #i would feel horrible if i started a fic and like never continued it due to my constantly growing lack of motivation and laziness #i don't think my stuff came from anything good anyway. it was purely a coping mechanism. #and now that i probably lost it well who knows what happens next #i never got into creative hobbies that much anyway i mostly felt heavy frustration over them and some sort of hatred for everything i did #shrugs. #why does my relationship with making art is tied to almost only negative feelings #kinda sad #whatever