#but the other mondo records i have sounded real good even on my old shit turntable.

[ko-fanatic]

Blood, Guts and Chocolate Cake

Rating: Mature

Fandom: Danganronpa

Pairings: IshiMondo

Summary:

Mondo Owada, the Ultimate Bodyguard, is entering a four year contract with one Kiyotaka Ishimaru, the Ultimate Idol. It makes sense, two Ultimates put together for their high school careers, and he could use the steady pay check to send home to Daiya; those medical bills were a bitch, and it was his fault the accident happened in the first place.

It was supposed to be easy, guard the cutesy, clean-cut idol from perverts and stalkers, no big deal! However, the world's perception of Kiyotaka Ishimaru was far different than what the young idol had become. During the first few months before even stepping into Hope's Peak, he's more worried for the young boy than he's ever been for anyone before.

TW: Alcohol, and eating disorders (both restrictive behaviours and B/P), mentions of disability, underage sex/sexualisation, drugs

The hallways of this damn building were too long.

That was definitely the first impression Mondo got, being led down said monotonous hallways by a young woman with an expression which implied that she simply wasn’t paid enough to care about small talk. Not that he had any room to judge, hands shoved in his pockets and a permanent scowl on his face. He might’ve been going to review an upcoming contract, but the best thing about his position was that there was no need to be all smiley; Hope Peak’s choice for Ultimate Bodyguard was all the credentials he needed at this point. 

Still, he couldn’t help but feel a bit intimidated by how long he would be working with these record label types. He couldn’t deny it made sense - hire the Ultimate Bodyguard to protect the Ultimate Idol, sound logic; it was just that a four year contract was… a lot. That wasn’t even thinking about the fact he was going to be glued to the guy’s hip for all that time, having to get along no matter what. Would he even have time to make friends of his own? Doubtful. Still, a paycheck was a paycheck, and he’d have to go to some highschool anyway, so kill two birds with one stone. 

He’d never had an issue smiling through vapid celebrity bullshit before. It was going to be an easy ride, too; from what he knew, the guy was as prim and proper as they came. Real boy next door image. Easy to take care of, and mainly just telling overzealous fans to back the fuck up. Simple. 

His inner monologue was broken by an abrupt stop, the woman only sending a bored glance his way before knocking. The door was pushed ajar with the quiet muttering of “Mondo Owada to see you, gentlemen”, before he was unceremoniously shepherded into the room. 

It was just as big as you’d expect from a building like this, with a gargantuan desk and several business-types sitting across from him. They were even backlit by a floor-to-ceiling window showing Tokyo in all its glory - like some cheesy ass movie. Still, taking a cursory glance around the room, he couldn’t see anyone fitting the description of “teen idol”, let alone Ishimaru himself...

“Owada-san, good afternoon!” One of the men greeted cheerfully, clasping his hand in one of those firm yet professional grips he’d gotten used to since rising up in his career, “My name is Shiro Kamei, and these gentlemen are Kenshin Aki and Yutaka Hayashida. We’re Kiyotaka Ishimaru-san’s managers.”

“Well, that answers one question,” He shrugged, not sugarcoating his words, but not being as rude as he certainly could be, “But I don’t see Ishimaru-san around. If I’m meeting with anyone, I personally think it should be with the guy I’m gonna be with 24/7, for the next four years.”

“Of course!” Kamei-san chirped, far too cheerful for his taste, especially considering the stench of ass-kissing that followed it. Not sincere, but too many meetings like this one had trained him to swallow down the vomit that threatened to spew from the fakeness of it all. 

“Ishimaru-san will be here soon,” Hyashida-san intoned, temperament a bit more palatable than Mr Chipper, “He’s a rather busy young man, being an idol of his caliber. Dance practice is just wrapping up, any minute now, so we can use this time to have a little chat - go through expectations for your role and such.”

Mondo managed to stop himself raising an eyebrow at that. Like he wasn’t the best bodyguard in Japan. He guessed it was something needed for a job of this sort, not temping or whatever, and so he settled down for a bunch of timewasting jabber. 

Or, it was, until a certain request caught his attention.

“We also expect him to be kept out of, well… trouble…”

“Thought he was a cutesy, innocent kid?” He frowned, sitting a little straighter in his seat, attention piqued, “I’m guessing he’s the kind to get mouth-breathers and creeps, huh?”

The three men looked a little more caged at that remark. A couple cleared throats, a few tugged collars and cuffs, awkward air. 

“Yes, there have been incidents, but nothing previous security couldn’t handle,” Aki-san informed, “The issue is a recent change in attitude. Nothing much, but tugging on the leash more than necessary, if you understand my meaning.”

He did. Part of him wanted to object to the idea that a sixteen year old needed to be kept on a leash at all, but idol shit was full of PR. 

“So boy next door is going through a little rebellion, and you want me to make sure it stays on the DL,” He shrugged, “Got it.”

“I wouldn’t put it like that, Owada-san -!”

Kamei-san was interrupted by several short, sharp raps, door opening to reveal the man of the hour. 

Ishimaru was pretty, no denying that. His eyes were what really caught everyone’s attention; bright, wide and doll-like. That said nothing about his facial structure - cheekbones and jawline and everything prominent - or his barbie doll-esque frame. He was probably one of the slimmest people Mondo had ever seen, at least in person. Well, and outside of a hospital. The media went absolutely gaga over his thigh gap, his lithe abs and delicate hip bones. 

He personally prefers a little more meat on the bones, a little less fragile, but he guessed it was an idol’s job to appeal to the masses. 

“Good morning, everybody!” He beams, but honestly? The sunshine emanating from him is a lot warmer - a lot more real - than Kamei-san. He actually had to take a second to come back to himself, knocked off equilibrium. The power of the Ultimate Idol, for you. 

“Kiyotaka, this is Mon -”

“Mondo Owada,” He cuts in, wanting to introduce himself, cut the preamble, and offers his hand to shake, “‘M gonna be the one guarding you.”

Ishimaru gives him a once over, and for two seconds he thinks he sees a smirk pull at the corner of the young man’s lips, but he soon brushes it off as a trick of the light. 

“Thank you so much for accepting our proposition, Owada-san!” He grins, and Mondo hates his little bi heart at that moment. Ishimaru clasps his hand. He can’t help but feel that they’re too calloused for a pretty boy idol, but he doesn’t dwell on it, “I hope we get along well!”

He’s loud, but the words are sweet, and Mondo relaxes a little bit. Easy job, as he thought. 

---

Mondo was proven wrong in a matter of three days into his contract. He’d certainly been proven wrong far quicker than that before; however, in terms of sheer what-the-fuckery-is-this, this situation took the cake. 

The train journey to the first tour destination wasn’t bad, if tedious. Kid spent all his time reading, and Mondo had no clue how he didn’t puke all over the place from staring at the pages. He’d looked at his phone for about five minutes and was ready to lie down and accept his death. 

… Trains were not his prefered method of transportation…

Ishimaru had passed on the sandwiches on offer, but so did Mondo. No big deal. Those things sucked ass, and maybe the kid was more nauseous than he seemed. Wish that was him, considering he was pretty sure his face was pale green. 

Settling into the hotel was fine, as was the tech set up in the venue. Stress emanating off everyone, but pretty normal as far as that shit was concerned. Ishimaru was dragged between costume fittings, tech run throughs and other things that just passed in a blur. 

No, what really proved to Mondo that the pretty boy idol was going through an actual rebellious phase, was what he walked in on at 11:56pm, night three. 

He’d gotten up due to a serious inability to sleep. Seriously, did he manage to get jet lag without even switching time zones? Nah, didn’t work like that. Maybe it was second hand adrenaline from the performance being tomorrow. Ishimaru might not make his kind of music, but the guy had this infectious enthusiasm for it all. He’d be backstage, too; premo location to see everything up close. He couldn’t help the slight smile on his face, in spite of how tired he felt. 

Any fleeting, fuzzy feelings disappeared, however, when he walked into the main area of their hotel suite. 

There stood Ishimaru, back to him, very much not dressed for bed. His jeans were so tight they looked spray painted on, not to mention the sequined top that cut off to show a tantalising flash of milky pale skin.

“Where’re you off to?” 

His question seemed to startle the kid, who practically jumped three feet in the air, hand clutching his chest as he whirled on him. 

“Fuck, what’s your problem?” He gasped out. Mondo couldn’t help but let his eyes widen, having not heard the boy swear since they met. Admittedly, it was only a few days, but Ishimaru just gave off such an innocent vibe. He’d questioned if the boy even knew a swear word for a while. 

“The guy I’m meant to protect is running off into the city at midnight, and obviously didn’t plan to tell me,” He answered bluntly, “So, come on, where’re you trying to slink off to?”

“None of your business,” He sniffed, shoulders squaring, “And stop… talking to me like that. Like I’m a child. It’s annoying as shit.” 

“Alright, sor-ry, jeez,” He apologised, hands up in surrender, “Let me just grab my coat and -”

“No!” Ishimaru ground out, “I’m going out, you're staying here, and my managers are none the wiser, got it?”

Oh, that sneaky fucker. While Mondo was all for personal freedom, no way was the scrawny kid going out there to get attacked and murdered in some urine soaked alleyway. For one, it’d completely fuck up his plans for the next four years - no money to send back to Daiya, and he seriously doubted Hope’s Peak would want an Ultimate Bodyguard who let the world’s most popular idol get murdered in a matter of days. 

“Yeah, no, not happening, kid,” He shut down, reaching over the boy to get his coat, only for hands to press against his chest, stopping him. 

“What do you want then? Money?” Ishimaru asked, looking up at him through his lashes. Fuck, the kid really went all out with the makeup; smokey eyeshadow and liner, glossed lips, the whole deal, “Or I can suck your dick?”

He nearly choked at that, face hot as hell and probably an embarrassing shade of red. “N-No! What the fuck?!” He yelled, only earning a shrug in response. 

“Look, I need to go out - alone,” Ishimaru began again, arguing a point Mondo simply wasn’t going to agree with, “I need to get a little fucked up, railed into some guy’s mattress, and then I’ll come back. I’ll be here again before sunrise.”

“Tugging on the leash more than necessary”, his ass! 

“Sorry, you're talking to the wrong guy,” He dismissed, doing his best impression of Daiya’s you done fucked up voice he could, “Back to bed. Don’t think you’re sneaking out, either. I’m just gonna stay out here all night, make sure you don’t go and get yourself cut up and dumped in the river. Y’know, my job.”

“Fuck you,” Ishimaru spat, storming back to his room with a mutter of ,“Asshole…”

If Mondo knew one thing, it was this… He’d really had no idea what he was signing himself up for.

---

A/N:

WOW, it's been a while since I've written for this fandom. Thank you Taka and Mondo for being an adorable pair of dumbasses and dragging me right back into DR. Hopefully, I'll add to my old fics too, but I've got lots of new ideas I want to play with (Including two other talentswaps and two AUs!)

For now, Ouran fics are on the back burner, I'm afraid. I'm sure I'll be back to them soon enough, but I'm a bit burnt out in my OHSHC obsession, so we'll see.

Also, as always, comments really help and if you want to take any of these concepts and run, go for it! All I ask is a credit and a link if possible! :)

#danganronpa #Dangan Ronpa #dr talentswap #idol!Ishimaru #bodyguard!Mondo #ishimondo #Kiyotaka Ishimaru #mondo oowada #blood guts and chocolate cake series #my fanfiction

[badlydrawnmanic]

time for episode 3 i guess! wish i could focus on the things i gotta do but something’s bugging me and i just can’t, i might have to start from scratch but anyway...

• manic wants to find a place where he belongs... • why were the triplets born in... an alternate dimension??? what • dingo is a tree and it’s freaking me out • sonic: hey did you notice anything strange about that tree   manic and sonia: no we did not see the canine face with stupid glasses staring at us directly as we passed by • the fact that manic’s drums can cause earthquakes and stuff is pretty neat • i seriously feel bad for dingo at this point • there’s a camera angle where it looks like manic’s levitating in front of sonic when sonic is supposed to be dragging him along real fast • i don’t understand why the bad guys are like “lmao nature and clean things are stinky” like i know you’re bad but like ??? man • i think this show would be much more visually appealing if they used brighter backgrounds like in mobodoon • again how old are they supposed to be, it’s their birthday? they’re so small • i know mayor winnieham (how the fuck do you spell that) is a horse but she looks like a soft dragon, she’s so nice and i actually like her voice • hooray for socialism • sonic sniffs and it sounds like jaleel had a stuffy nose that day • horse lady is so nice but a ton of nice people in this cartoon are traitors so i’m like :grimace: • A CHAOS EMERALD • manic is so overwhelmed by the fact that someone cared about him and his siblings that he starts to like fall backwards and the lady has to push a chair under him, he’s crying someone hug this boy • “sonic’s always been cool, having this mondo world as his home” sorta implies that he had adventures before all this, i only say this because i’ve been trying to slap together a timeline and i think i made underground take place between satam and sonic 3? i forget exactly

• h • you’d think horse lady would be more excited that they’ve returned and stuff • gee sonia why does your mom let you have super speed and strength • did she recognize dingo this time?? she got mud on her and immediately attacked him so like... would she do that to anyone??? • the people who wrote this show don’t understand how siblings interact with each other, i don’t call my brother “bro” every two seconds and i don’t think anybody does • okay why does the horse lady say they were born in this nursery room, i would assume that that’s... not true... please tell me there’s a hospital or something in this city • three episodes into the series and manic’s like “i’m gonna stay here and break up the band :D” • horse lady made evil eyebrows i don’t trust her all adults are bad • SONG TIME AGAIN, SONIC UNDERGROUND STYLE • I think this is one of the only songs where manic sings and it’s not even clear that it’s him? i was told that it was him singing • GSDJG MANIC’S HAIR IS BIRDS • sometimes the baby triplets are cute and sometimes they’re terrifying • they reused animation that was used like just before the song started • manic goes “wow” in his normal voice right in the middle of the song • i actually really like this song, but like... the singing voice is odd, a bit nasally. other than that it’s good and i’d listen to it again, like... 9/10 i think, i’ll hum it absentmindedly after the episode is done. if they re-recorded this for any reason or if there was a cover of it i’d be pretty happy about that! • sleet unrolls a huge sheet of paper with absolutely nothing on it • the background characters in mobodoon aren’t as hideous as the normal background characters • sonic leaving fire everywhere when he runs seems like it would be an issue at some point • sleet and dingo are terrorists • they deadass just stole a family’s whole house • THE CHAOS EMERALD • i’m calling it a chaos emerald, apparently it controls the daylight cycle and structural integrity of the whole dimension which is odd • if she’s so worried that mobodoon will fade why don’t they evacuate? unless they can’t without the chaos emerald or something • apparently they can leave whenever because sonic’s back with sleet and dingo • they used footage from this episode in the previous episode’s music segment...? i wonder how production was • sonia and manic fall from the sky • “manic, hold all the important doohickeys while we do the cool stuff” • dingo’s fucking feral in this segment holy shit calm down • the cave of wonders................ • MANIC HAS LITTLE SHARP TEETH • manic did it!! • i still don’t get how mobodoon works • how unstable is that dimension if the chaos emerald being gone for an hour max is enough to make it nearly collapse • sonic called dingo “dingus” and i have no idea how old that term is

• manic looks like a very small child waiting for his mom to say he did a good job saying “thank you” to the grocery store checkout person and that’s adorable but also he looks goofy as shit • this poor boy, i imagine he just wants a mother figure, horse lady has her hand on his shoulder and she’s probably one of the few dependably nice people they’ve encountered in a while • aw, sonic and sonia like... acknowledge that manic is happy here and are willing to let him stay in mobodoon, that’s pretty wholesome. i feel like this was supposed to be an emotional beat but like... bad pacing kinda mucks it up

• “don’t forget to visit” god, my heart, he says it so gently like poor baby • “oh i almost forgot that your mother who has been absent in your lives since you were literal babies and that you’ve been risking your lives to find stopped by during the climax of the episode, my mistake”

• okay, i can see the horse part of her now maybe more of a donkey • “together at last” is one of the audio blurbs they play and they say it like they’ve been separated forever • they knocked sleet back into mobodoon like that solves the problem??? • i kinda like how they replay part of the song at the end of the episode to like... reestablish an idea in a different light? like when it played the first time it’s like “oh i found my childhood home and the place where i came from” and now it’s like “i’ve found the place where i belong with my loved ones” and that’s actually really good imo • i feel like manic has the most potential for depth out of all of them just because if you look any deeper into what’s happening in the show it gets kinda sad? [slaps roof of manic] this bad boy can fit so much emotional trauma in it

#sonic underground #not an ask #ooc #sonic underground rewatch!

[jswdmb1]

Shine

“Let 'em get high Let 'em get stoned Everything will be alright if you let it go”

- Mondo Cozmo

John Boehner wants to you smoke dope.  Think about that.  This is a man who was a very conservative republican, and not just any republican. He was speaker of the house.  Not 30 years ago but less than 5.  The same guy who was “unalterably opposed” to marijuana legalization in 2015 wants you to be able to buy your weed with the same ease and legality as a six pack of beer.  Oh, and he’ll take your money while you are at it as a board member of Acreage Holdings, a company that cultivates, processes and dispenses cannabis in 11 states.  I mean, why give that money to the kid at the used record store when there are so many out-of-work former speakers of the house out on the market (don’t worry, Paul Ryan, there is plenty wacky tabacky for you to go out and sell too).  

Now, this may sound like I’m picking on old John, but I’m not.  There are way better things to pick on him about and besides, isn’t it a bit quaint to pick on a guy like that compared to what we have now?  In any event, I’m just using him as an example of how the tide of bong water has turned on this subject.  More and more folks realize that maybe there is a problem with criminalizing a relatively safe substance (compared to other drugs including alcohol) that may have some medicinal benefits.  Maybe things could be a bit better for someone with chronic pain, glaucoma, or just had a bad day if the stuff could be easily and safely purchased.   In very simple terms, it makes a lot of sense, but like everything, it is way more complicated than that.

The first problem is that marijuana is listed as a schedule I drug by the federal government.  Without getting too technical, that means it has no medicinal value and is not acceptable to be possessed for recreational use under any circumstances.  Drugs like heroin and cocaine are on this list along with many others (if you need a real education on this just watch a Cheech and Chong marathon).  The problem is that many drugs that have questionable value or are far more abused are not on the list.  As a matter of fact, your doctors, insurance companies, and anyone who is trying to make a buck off the drug wants you to have these in quite large quantities at very affordable prices.  The drug that first comes to mind for me is Ativan.  Ativan is a drug commonly prescribed for anxiety, sleep, and basically to calm you down.  It’s Valium for the millennial age.  It works like a charm but is quickly habit forming.  It is also incredibly dangerous when mixed with alcohol.  If you want to party like a rock star (and maybe die like one) wash your Ativan down with some bourbon and let the fun begin (none of which you’ll remember, trust me).

I know all of this because I’ve had my share of substances.  Please do not take this next paragraph as any sort of bragging.  For starters, I know people who have done WAY more than me.  Anyone who knows me knows that and that I always managed to stay off the edge when it came to too much (very subjective there, but let’s go with it).  Also, it really is nothing to brag about. Certainly not when the use turns into abuse and your jobs, health and relationships are at risk.  That being said, I don’t see anything wrong with sharing the experiences of using drugs and I think that puts my eventual conclusion to this post in context.  So, my story in a few sentences is that I drank for about 30 years, smoked pot for about half that time, and supplemented with a host of prescription medications throughout.  Some were relatively harmless like the range of antidepressants I have been on (though one I took in the 90’s turned out to possibly cause a fatal liver problem, but hey what the hell we all make mistakes!).  Others, like Ativan were addictive and more problematic when combined with other drugs. By the time I got sober, I had mostly phased out pot, but was hitting alcohol and prescription drugs pretty hard.  I haven’t had anything stronger than a cup of coffee or non-alcholoic beer in just over six months.

With that background, my position on the legalization of marijuana is surprising.  I’ll start with the statement that legal or not, everyone should get high at least once in their lives.  When done right, and in the proper setting, it puts you into a state of mind that is truly liberating.  It is no accident that so many creative endeavors have been fueled by the stuff. I also see how it could benefit in a number of ways as a medicinal agent.  But, just because pot may be a great experience and possibly even helpful, should it be legal?  Should it be available next to the Jack Daniels and the pharmacy where they are dishing out the Ativan?  My question to John Boehner and anyone else who has pivoted to supporting legalization is why now?  What has changed that makes it the right time?  Why marijuana and not cocaine?  Why not go the other way and explore prohibition of alcohol again?  

My point is that whether it is legal or not, it doesn’t fundamentally change the morality of doing drugs.  I have never understood why one drug is fine (we can drink wine at church!) and others are explicitly immoral (satan wants you to smoke dope!)  I find nothing immoral about using any drug any more than I would find it immoral to sit and eat a pound of bacon (done it – separate post). It may not be a good decision, especially when done in a way that harms yourself and others, but we make lots of bad choices that aren’t regulated and I don’t see why marijuana is singled out along with a few other drugs.  So, if there is nothing “wrong” with smoking pot, why not make it legal?  Heck, why not make everything legal?  A true libertarian (which I am not) would say hell yes it should all be legal.  Someone with an open mind, but with a logical fear that wide open may be too much, may say how about we think about it a little more.  I am in that camp.  I just don’t get the rush to legalize at this point.  If you want to smoke dope, you can do it just about anywhere.  It’s already been decriminalized or outright legalized in terms of small recreational use in many parts of the country.  Go to one of those places, find a dealer (or get yourself a medical card), and have a blast.  Who gives a shit if the federal government cares or not.  They certainly are looking the other way when you accumulate your 72 assault rifles and stash of 10,000 rounds of ammunition (is that a lot? I have a no idea but I wanted to sound very dramatic so I hope it is). I really don’t think it matters if you smoke a joint around the campfire this summer.

I guess the bottom line for me is that we have bigger fish to fry and I am pretty indifferent at this point if it is ever legal or not.  Right now, I am not interested in the stuff at all, but that may change as I explore my mental and physical health in this state I’m in of abstinence. If and when that happens, I’ll have my next dance with Mary Jane with or without Uncle Sam on my side.  If he’s with me though, I certainly will pass the joint along.  The poor boy sure seems like he needs it after the year we’ve had.  And if any of you are around, you can join us.  Even if it’s your first time, you are welcome. Just remember to inhale.

Cheers,

Jim