#ause the lore is cool and I like to analyze it. Or I think there's an interesting social dynamic going on which is fun to kind of pick

[icewindandboringhorror]

*screenshots the highlights of my youtube to mp3 downloads folder as if it were some fancy aesthetic spotify wrapped image or whatever* 

#I don't know how spotify works I'm not sure how the images people share are actually generated but you know what I mean lol #Though I do wish the native windows music player thing kept track of like.. how many times you listened to a song or something #merely because I think it would be really funny for me since I'm very much a like 'listen to the same 3 songs on rotation for literally #4 months at a time. then eventually rotate in another few songs to replace those. never revisit any of them again' type person #And like most media I have a lot of trouble connecting with music or ascribing it the same deep meaning that most other people seem to get o #ut of it like. I think maybe it has something to do with my emotional range in general being very shallow (I am neutral 90% of the #time and even when I'm not I just don't feel things very strongly. when I do feel antyhing it's weak fleeting emotions usuually that #I don't even remember a few days from then. You know how babies don't have object permanence? It's like I don't have emotional permanence lo #l. Which is probably standard for like. severe childhood neglect situations where nobody was around for you to mirror their #emotions in early childhood or whatever usually happens when people are being raised. Like if nobody was there to encourage the development #of emotions and show what those look like then maybe your brain just doesn't develop them properly or etc. etc. ANYWAY gjhjhb) #I think maybe that has somehting to do with why it's just really hard for me to care about media of all kinds - and even when I do it's not #very deep. Also probably why I've never really been in a fandom or gone to a concert or been really into anything like that. Because people #form deep emotional connections and memories and attachments to their favorite media and I just like... don't #I can still like things!! But it's always in a more like.. intellectual kind of cognitive way if that makes sense? Like if I liked a TV show #it would never be becaise I find the message heartwarming or the characters relatable or because it made me FEEL something. It would be bec #ause the lore is cool and I like to analyze it. Or I think there's an interesting social dynamic going on which is fun to kind of pick #at the innerworkings of. And if I like a song like.. it's not because This Music Got Me Through A Hard time In My Life or because #I relate deeply to the lyrics or it makes me feel a certain way - it's usually because the overlapping of instruments or thetones that are #used interests me or there's something intruguing or cool about it to hear. Part of why I like classical or choir music is that there's oft #en so many instruments playing over each other it's like a little puzzle to try and hear each part seperately or etc. etc. #Which isn't to say that I can NEVER relate to or feel some sort of attachement or idea related to a piece of media. but just that it's not #ever very strong. like not powerful enough to be some significant motivator or pivotal aspect of my personality or etc. #BUT ANYWAY. I still can like things to a degree probably not just the same exact way as others lol. #So I rarely even listen to music that often (maybe once a week or so? I'll listen to like one song or two. but I'm not like a 'have music on #in the background playing in the house all the time' or 'listen to music while I get ready' type) but when I do it's very repetitive. I do #think it would be interesting to see the statistics then lol. I thought windows media player used to track statistics so I wonder why the #'updated' version of that on windows 10 doesnt??? Maybe bc they assume everyone is using streaming services instead? stinky #I don;t think the built in music player on my phone tracks anything either. It's more of just a file accessor or something. hmmgbb #That alone will never convince me to actually use some service to get music though lol. I don't need the statistics. yttmp3 for life babey