#and saw their relationship as something very precious to her; imo that's why she clings to it so desperately

[mynameisemma]

I know Sonya's feelings for Nikolai are much more complicated and complex and messy than "pure unyielding love UwU" and everyone's entitled to their interpretations and headcanons but the "Sonya realized she actually never loved Nikolai" attitude does give me the "True Love must be Always Pure, Stable and Healthy UwU" vibes

#I don't even insist that her feelings for Nikolai were True Love (although I do believe she was in love with him for many years #and saw their relationship as something very precious to her; imo that's why she clings to it so desperately #when natalya demands her to write the letter because as an orphan she doesn't have much and now the only dear thing is also taken away #from her (im goingg mental)) but it's just let the characters be messy in their feelings!! let them be delusional!! #it honestly feels so much more resonating and interesting #and I've recently come across a hc that went like that ''sonya was actually disgusted with nikolai's attention #but convinced herself she was in love with him because it meant a stable and secure place in the rostovs household'' #and while i have nothing personal against this person's hc their entitled to interpret the text however they want #it's just so astounding to me that by removing sonya's feelings for nikolai this person (perhaps inadvertently) painted their relationship #the way countess saw it (while being a sonya's fan)