#all due respect to my adhd doctor but you don't fix my sleep schedule by sending me into a depressive spiral that sounds like a bad idea

[areyoudoingthis]

the thing about not fucking up my sleep schedule during the summer so that i don't end up having to suffer through a week of insomnia to fix it (aside from this being a new experience for me, usually i manage to unfuck up my sleep schedule in a day or two) is that staying up all night reading during the summer is literally the reason i stay alive. it may sound dramatic but i spend the whole work year subjecting myself to a hateful schedule of being up before the sun, and the reason i survive it is because i know come january I'll have night after night of reading for hours and hours and hours uninterrupted, peaceful quiet. I've been doing this since I was a child, it kept me going back then too, it's kept me going my whole life. i can't afford a lot of expensive pleasures like traveling, or buying that new gaming pc I've wanted for years, but i can stay up until 6am reading every day for a month. yes I'd love to avoid going through the hell week I've just endured ever again, but if you ask me to sacrifice my favorite summer passtime literally what's the point of being alive

#all due respect to my adhd doctor but you don't fix my sleep schedule by sending me into a depressive spiral that sounds like a bad idea #“wake up at the same time every day” yeah no thanks I'd literally rather die than give sleeping in during the weekends and holidays #how is “subject yourself to allowing capitalism to control your schedule every day for the rest of your life” good advice to anyone #“get up at 7.30 even when you don't have to” #hell will freeze over before i set an alarm on a sunday #if that's the solution thanks i don't want it #I'm also pretty sure the insomnia had more to do with everything going on than with my sleep schedule being backwards #alext txt