(jaehyun’s) ESTP as a person😘 pt. 3
DISCLAIMER: This post is in no way trying to describe how Jaehyun is in real life, or to tell what his likes and dislikes are. This post indicates on ESTP’s traits, how they think, what they like and what they don’t like, what they usually do in general. Although, I might try to make insinuations here and there, but that’s just it, an insinuation.
Click here to read pt. 1
Click here to read pt. 2
Click here to read my analysis on Jaehyun’s MBTI
Hey, y’all!!! I’m backkkk. As I said in the last post, I’ll be writing about ESTP’s love language. There are a few references on this, and some are different than the others, so I’m just gonna try to pick the ones that probably suit us the most. Without further ado.....
ESTP LOVE LANGUAGE
So, in general there are five love languages:
Acts of Service
Words of Affirmation
I found a couple of sources that state the ESTPs love sign, and there were different versions of it. But I feel like this one is the one that is closest to what I feel ESTP is like
Now, I’m gonna try to explain one by one and try to rank it based on which one I think we would most likely do to the ones that we care.
ESTP, being the ever so present type, we love to do things in action. That being said, spending time with our significant others is always a number one for us. ESTP will take you out to do things with us, it could be as simple as a walk together in a park, or even travelling together. We love to share life experiences with our partner, because we want them to feel the excitement that we feel when we do something. I feel like long distance relationship would be hard for us? I’ve never been in one actually, but I feel like we would always have the need to see each other, or else we would be occupied with the side of the world that we’re currently in, and in turn start to forget about the other side of the world? Because we’re very present, and it’s kinda hard for us to dwell on things that’s not in front of our eyes. Anyways, that’s just my analysis though. Let me know if you’re an ESTP and you’ve been in a long distance relationship.
So, if an ESTP is constantly bugging you to go somewhere with them, just know that you mean something to them. Trust me, we don’t like wasting our time with people we don’t want to hang out with, we’d rather stay home and do something else altogether (lol).
I’d like to share one of my kinda funny experience. So I was interested in this INTJ guy one time. At that time, I was already into MBTI but I was still learning a few things and I absolutely didn’t know what INTJs were like. Turns out, they’re like probably one of the most introverted types. Whereas me, I was like 95% extroverted. So, my kind of date was like going to the movies, shopping at the mall, etc. And I was the one who was always initiating it, like, hey, let’s go out tomorrow. And by the end of the day, I was like, what are you doing tomorrow? Are you free? Let’s catch this movie. And by the SECOND date, he was like, “Don’t you ever get tired? I’m actually tired from just keeping up with you.” HE LITTERALLY SAID THAT. And he literally got sick the next day. I’m not saying that he got sick becasue of me... BUt... maybe, tho? This is like soooooo funny once I read about INTJs, becasue they’re almost like the polar opposite of ESTP. SHOUT OUT TO INTJs OUT THERE! Y’all are intellectuals! (That dude is like a genius and a psychic I swear)
Contrary to the chart above, I feel like this type comes second to quality time. Touching, for me at least, kinda shows affections. It doesn’t necessarily have to be sexual, just a simple pinching your cheeks, or caressing your hand casually. Those simple things, coming from us, shows that you mean something to us. We are not good with words (again, because FE is our third function), so we refer to touches to convey our feelings.
Sometimes, though, it also means that we enjoy being around you. Like an affirmation that ‘oh, you’re here with me, and I love it’. Even in a platonic relationship, we like to touch. Like a friendly slap on the arm, or like hugs or cuddles. I am widely known for being touchy with my close guy friends. At first, I thought nothing of it, because I just love kidding around with them and would sometimes like poke here and there, and would hug or cuddle out of nowhere. UNTIL, one day I found out that their girlfriends actually despised me because they thought I was flirty and being... cheap(?). Anyways, I just laughed it off because, come on, that’s just who I am, it’s not like I sleep around with their boyfriends or something.
ACTS OF SERVICE
We don’t do things for people just for the sake of it, or to please other people. If anything, we hate being told what to do. ESTPs are free spirited people, and we don’t like being obligated to do something. And we’re very efficient and practical people. So we don’t do a lot of things for other people.
Don’t get me wrong, though, we’re not ignorant. We just always have to have this reasoning behind everything that we do. Like, why would I go through so much effort just to do this to this person. I mean, they would probably still survive without even my help. But, of course, if you ask for our help, we WILL help you. We’re just not gonna help you out of the blue. You gotta ask for it.
BUT when it comes to someone we truly care, we will know if you need our help. We will spot where you lack on something, or where you’re having a hard time, why you’re going through it. And we will have this feeling inside us like we want to help you overcome your hardships. Because, even though it’s our third function, the EXTROVERTED FEELING function of us is still there, lingering in the back of our mind. And I guess it’s being triggered when we see someone we love or care is in a hard time.
So, when an ESTP is suddenly giving you help without you even asking it, it means that they care about you, and that they’re thinking about you.
Now, in Jaehyun’s instance, I can see why people mistook him for an ENFJ (I finally see some light in this matter). In some cases, the members say that Jaehyun helped them get through things, like I believe Jungwoo said something about this? And someone in the Dream too said that Jaehyun was a reliable hyung. And it’s actually very visible with Winwin. Like, we can all see, at the beginning period of Winwin joining NCT, Jaehyun always put him under his wing. You can see it in NCT LIFE where they had a cooking competition, and the one where they went to Paju(?), like he was always helping him, and keeping him company, more so than the other members. I think it’s because he was finally having a friend (same aged friend)? Like he realizes that Winwin is having a hard time, and it’s his friend, so he wants him to do better. This thing is mentioned by other members because it’s probably memorable to them, but I feel like it’s actually not something that Jaehyun would do out of nilly-willy. He does that because he cares about those members alot. And that’s why people mistook him as an ENFJ (which is an FE dominant).
This one is related to my last post.
I feel like ESTPs don’t like doing things that aren’t practical(?), because we’re very practical. So, putting efforts into something that we don’t think is worth it, or is getting us to what we want to achieve, is a waste of our time. That’s why, I’d like to think that ESTPs are very efficient. So, to us, buying things for other people just for the sake of it is inefficient.
For example, if you read my last post about the graduation, while my other friend will buy tons of gifts for her friends out of.... I don’t know, obligations perhaps? Or just simply for the sake of being kind? Us ESTPs, we’re gonna have this thought inside our head like, why should I buy them gifts? I mean, yes, we’re friends, but we barely talk to each other. If I buy them gift, then does that mean I have to buy others gifts too? That’s too inconvenient.
So when we do buy something for other people, it means that we’re thinking of them. That they’re in the back of our mind. It’s not necessarily in a romantic way. For instance, I am somehow known for being insensitive becasue I barely even gifted my friends on their birthday. And one day, I was doing internship at this hospital, and it was on a huge religious holiday where we would usually spend time at home with our family, but we were here at this hospital tending to emergency patients. At that time, my friend, who was an ISFJ btw, the most big soft hearted person I’ve ever known, she was soooo sad that she was stuck at the hospital and she cried, saying like ‘i should be at home at this time with my family’. And I understood where she came from, and I actually felt her sadness. And to add to that, when we ordered some Mcdonalds and she ordered a mcflurry, we couldn’t eat it immediately because the emergency room was packed with patients, and the ice cream ended up turning into milk and she never ate it. That kinda added to her sadness, in my head. So what did I do? I actually went to the convenience store and I bought her an Oreo ice cream. And she was SHOOKETH that she tweeted it. Because never in her life had she’d seen me buying something for anyone. Lol. Anyways, that’s just an example to give you guys some image of how ESTPs feel.
And I feel like, if you receive this treatment, if you’re at this stage, it’s like you are legit in our inner circle. In our heart. No doubt. And this doesn’t come often, mind you. Like the chance of it happening is only 15%. Lol.
WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
Now this, is definitely the last. This is, to me at least, is the hardest thing to do ever. I don’t know if it’s because of our FE tertiary function? Or is it just the way I was raised in? I don’t know.....
But I do know that ESTPs feel uncomfortable in emotional situations. We avoid it. It’s not that we’re heartless, we just feel awkward. Like we don’t know what to say. Don’t know how to convey things in words. This is actually one of the reasons why I like writing, because it’s easier than to have to say it out loud.
Like, when one of my family member passed, I never spoke a word about it, not even to my mom. But I actually wrote a blog about it, like a really long one.
Some even say that ESTPs hate emotional confrontation. And it’s mainly because of our FE tertiary function. We feel awkward having to deal with situations using this function. We can go through it, but we just prefer not to, you know? But a debate? It’s a whole different story. I’ll talk about this particular trait in the next post. It kinda explains why ESTPs have a strong personality.
Anyways, back to the love language. So, yeah, it’s hard for us to say like ‘I love you’, or like ‘you’re so amazing’, or ‘I really admire your blabla’. I feel like it’s too... I don’t know... cringy? And it’s like, again, we have to put so much effort in order to be brave enough to say those words to the people that we cherish. And when we DO say it, it means that you’re important enough for us to put effort in being brave and say it.
But, don’t get too excited already. We usually don’t really say it directly in your face. lol. For me, I’ve actually conveyed my feelings to a dear friend, like how I was so proud of her etc., through a twitter and instagram post. hehe. I don’t know, I just can’t find the need to say it in her face, like it’s too cheesy. But a post is I feel like even more special becasue other people get to see it? I don’t know.
I’m rating this the last becasue the probability of it happening is like probably only 5%? So if an ESTP is making a post or saying words of affirmation to you, you are THAT special to them.
Now, as a final, here’s my personal rank
QUALITY TIME 30%
PHYSICAL TOUCH 25%
ACTS OF SERVICE 25%
WORDS OF AFFIRMATION 5%
SO, THAT’S OUR LOVE LANGUAGE. Mind you, I’m not an expert on this, so this is like my unreliable analysis, and very very based on my personal experience. Lol. I still have a few things to say though, so, probs 1 or 2 more post?
Do you guys want me to do other member’s personality analysis? I know Haechan’s an ENFP, and I have a couple of ENFP friends. Hmmm, I’m currently trying to guess Johnny’s MBTI, becasue I see some similarity between him and my ENTJ friend. And the way that he vibe with Jaehyun is similar with me and my friend. I’m not sure though. I’m also interested in Doyoung’s. And Yuta’s actully. I read that Doyoung actually mentioned his MBTI on Vlive? But I forgot what it was. And I’ve been trying to find it becasue I kinda want to do an anlysis on him, but couldn’t.
What do you guys think? Do you want me to do an anlysis on other member? Lemme know!! Cheers!
To be continued...
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