#a great famine hit and of course made it impossible for his family to feed everyone

[wolfofwinchester]

that countess; backstory.

“Think what they may; let ‘em hate me, let ‘em love me, let ‘em think whatever they will! But they won’t ever forget about me.”

WARNING: mentions of starvation, body horror, the great famine of ireland, cannibalism.

Claudia Ó Faoláin was born in Donegal, Ireland from the illicitus affair between Máire Ó Faoláin & an unfaithful Lord Phantomhive, coming into the world as an anemia-ridden but spirited, social girl that was nigh unstoppable. She was raised by her mother and her mother’s twin Róisín, her father never present - never even met outside of being seen thrice when she was just a babe and very little, but she didn’t need him around; she grew in love and comfort, and she was a handful. Adults failed in stilling the girl, she shot off like a rocket the day she learned how to walk; an energetic & highly active personality driven by this compulsive urge to live her life unrestrained! Her body contradicted itself quite often – even into late adulthood – where it’d be riddled with fatigue while also being imbued with the fidgets that refused to rest. Of course there were moments she hadn’t a choice, but otherwise she kept herself consistently occupied.

Claudia was raised in an enormous house filled to the brim with family; although she was an only child, she had no shortage of cousins - both of which were blood related and non-blood related! The Ó Faoláin household was actually a tight-knit coven of Celtic Paganists made up of multiple families that had been interwoven for generations by bond & by pact. They were one of the biggest families in Donegal, and also one of the most loyal. Betrayal wasn’t something that existed within their homes - they were the very essence of a loving family. Colorful and different each, but family just the same that pulled their weight and had their name known quite popularly in their side of Ireland. Not a wealthy family, but one that got by just the same - especially with how they pooled their resources. Breakfasts, lunches and dinners all eaten together and in fair amounts.

It was essentially impossible to be born into this family and not have a domestic streak. Even for the ones that never had children they still stuck around as aunts & uncles to help look after the youngins. The fact they were a family known to worship the Goddess of Hearth, Brigid, might have something to do with this naturalborn affinity. The newest blue-haired addition was certainly no exception.

It was the age of seven when Claudia received what really made her childhood so special; her companion Gelert, who was a small pup just like she when he first came to her thanks to an uncle that reared hounds and bred what at the time was both the most daring & unusual thing; domestic wolves. Gelert was the runt of the newest bunch when Claudia found herself drawn to him, completely enamored - love at first sight! Máire, of course, had her own reservations, but was comforted by the uncle that he would help little ‘Dia raise the wolf and see to it she learns absolutely everything there is to know about caring for a wolf. Seeing her little girl bond so immediately with the wolf pup did bring a good feeling to the faith healer’s gut too, and her gut had yet to deceive her. Máire agreed, and the two became a match. A girl and her dog - or rather, a girl and her wolf!

Gelert was not her only source of companionship though, Claudia’s playful & rowdy personality earned her a great many friendships and tight bonds with relatives her age, becoming a go-to when a problem arose and the muscle when confrontation sparked among children. She’d gotten into her fair share of fights as children are wont to do, inflicted with bruises and cuts, the rare busted lip and the black eyes, but thankfully her mother was the local faith healer that seen to her recovery – as well as her punishment! Still, such things were normal, and it was a very happy childhood.

In time as she approached the age of 10, it was a surprise to no one that even while young, Claudia vouched to work with the Ó Faoláin lumber business. She’d watch how her older cousins went from being thin things to having muscle, and she wanted in on that. The way her body would feel so weak absolutely aggravated her beyond measure, so this, by her logic, was the perfect way to build up her strength. It worked for her cousins! While her mother told her that’s not at all what would solve the issue, Claudia wouldn’t hear of it - in one ear and out the other.

Enough pleading to her blooded grandfather than ran the business led to her landing a meager position that involved learning how to swing an axe, and when she finally proved she could swing that damn thing hard and well, and eventually knock down any tree in her way, she made her way up. Not quite to the grown-ups, but still, she was a tree chopper! And like she’d hoped, she did feel her body growing stronger over the months and years dedicated to the work. It did boil her blood to learn this wasn’t going to stop those bouts of exhaust though ( Máire in the bg: “I told you so!!” ), and it did eventually become the reason she had to drop from the work due to being driven by her own frustrating and driving herself into overload, her body giving out all together more than once. She was young, she was emotional, she was angry with herself and that anger brought out self-destructive tendencies such as working herself to exhaustion, which was especially bad for her health. Her grandfather benched her, and Claudia became despondent, swallowed in her own self-loathing and anger.

The uncle that’d given her Gelert was the one who eventually shook her out of her loathsome caccoon, offering to show her the ropes of how to raise hounds and brush up on new wolf rearing techniques. It’d direct her attention and take her mind off her own negativity, and it’d give her something fun to do while also not giving her the capability to work herself to the bone so fiercely. Claudia joined forces and indeed learned exactly that, and she became damn good at it, too. He called her a natural and said she had to have been truly blessed by the  Morrígan to be able to handle this sort of job so well, as if rearing dogs is something she was meant to do. And boy, did she love it.

From logging to raising canines & domestic wolves, Claudia paved herself the small, respectable and trustworthy reputation alongside her uncle when it came to the business. She reared expert hunters, sheepherders, search and rescuers, protectors and loyal, loving and obedient companions, and she raised ‘em well. Her uncle couldn’t have been more proud.

Then everything became Hell on Earth in 1845. The Great Famine struck across Ireland and it was merciless if you were of the common and lower caste. The Ó Faoláins were no exceptions. For a while things were fine with their businesses being what they were, but they were a very big family, and they did have to communicate with other humans. This led to contractions of smallpox, which hit a portion of the family hard while the rest were stricken with hunger. Claudia was one of the early ones to go down for the count due to starvation and became bedridden, secluded and safe in her bedroom where she would view such a horror show as time went on through an open door. It was Hell if ever a thing existed; to be forced to lie there helpless and watch your once enormous family fade to skin and bones before your very own eyes, become so unnaturally thin, become so gaunt or bloated as they lost their teeth and hair, and form such horrible rashes across their skin. Eventually, she began to witness their deaths.

Claudia was beginning to lose some of her own hair as her own weight dropped, but she was kept afloat just enough due to her wayward father sending secret food supplies every now and then that her mother made stretch the best she could, and eventually run out of. Death hung over Claudia constantly, for months. She felt herself starving, she felt like her stomach was eating itself. She was in so much pain, and her lungs hurt too much to sob properly. It was weak rasps and silent tears, and the only time she managed to scream was when she noticed through drifting consciousness that some of her relatives, the uncle she’d gotten closest to due to their houndwork, were cutting digits off their own hands and slicing off pieces from their own bodies in complete desperation to feed the family. The shock was enough to make her sick as she realized they’d been the ones in charge of feeding their family as they were among the healthiest, and she’d noticed their arms were wrapped up tight in her mother’s medicinal cloths. Retching during her starvation period was pure agony on her body.

Máire was at her wits ends with both caring for the family and for pleading with Lord Phantomhive through her mystical means. While so far away he’d only brushed these communications off as tricks of absinthe or odd dreams, Máire shifted into becoming completely ruthless. Pleading dreams and sporadic thoughts of Claudia and the state of Ireland went from being harmless to harmful as the faith healer dug her claws in deep and summoned the more darker energies of her darker Goddess, the Mórrígan. Dreams became nightmares, thoughts became ungodly hallucinations, pleading became demands. His will was being summoned to make a move and to make a move now to rescue Claudia, and eventually, he cracked. A ship departed from London with the Head on board, shaken up and pale, dark-eyed and on high alert. He made for the shores of Donegal.

When he arrived, Máire was quick to meet with him on board. The exchange was… heated, wrathful, intense, but he was damn frightened of Máire at this point, and completely sold on all suspicions that she was a woman of the dark arts. He thought her a genius woman of faith, but no doctor he knew of could cast the dark cloud she had over him. The exchange went on for hours, from an afternoon to deep into the night. Many things were said, and many great points were stacked against him. His former lover laid down all her cards that she knew about him:

1] She knew about his wife, thus discovering he was unloyal to her.

2] She knew he’d failed to conceive an heir with his wife, and Claudia is his only child. His only hope for a continued legacy of the Phantomhive name. ( This was a curse delivered by Máire when she discovered she was nothing but a secret lover to him and that he did, in fact, have a wife back home. She cursed him with infertility while she was pregnant with Claudia. )

3] He was growing old, and his family name meant everything to him. If he left Claudia here to die, he was his family name and stature to die.

4] If he didn’t take Claudia, then she would personally see to the downfall of the Phantomhives. Hell have no wrath like a mother scorned.

5] She knows there is a part of him that does care for Claudia. He’d sent coin, he’d sent gifts and he’d sent dresses for her. He was a miserable excuse for a father, he would not have come if it weren’t for the pushing of Máire. This is his only chance for redemption.

Needless to say, she was successful. The Earl even surprised her by saying he would take her away from here too, along with immediate family, but just immediate, meaning Claudia and her twin sister ( their parents had faded with the Famine ). From what he’s heard through rare letters, Claudia’s stubborn and devoted to family - there’s no way she would stay in England if she didn’t have her mother present at least. That was his guess. And.. just a sign of “good will”. For the memories he did make with Máire.

Leaving.. wasn’t easy. It gave great bouts of anxiety and reluctance to both of the Ó Faoláin twins. This felt like betrayal. This felt sick. Leaving their family to suffer while they went elsewhere was a notion that completely haunted the both of them. This was their clan - this is what they’d known all their lives and what they expected to know until their final days. To leave their heritage, their home, their family behind to go to Britain of all places, ruled by the heinous monarchy that’d forsaken their country, their people, was not something either of them could make peace with, and will never make peace with. Still, the second they confessed this to what little clan remained, there was almost no hesitation: Go.

The Ó Faoláins weren’t without their hate for England and Queen Victoria, and the youngers were quick to curse them. This hate is blood deep, but love for family is even deeper. If one of them had a chance, there’s no other answer and they would not let you ignore it: Take it.

Máire wept.

Claudia wasn’t present for the conversation, she only heard their quiet voices beyond her door and the sounds of her mother’s sobs. Her consciousness waned strongly at this point, but Gelert kept her awake as he rested by her side, underweight. Malnourished. Claudia remembers her mother coming into her room and how her voice sounded like it was close but in the same breath so far away, and loose explanations of the situation. She remembers her mother lifting her from the bed as her Aunt Ros picked up Gelert. She remembers seeing over the side of her mother at the other aunts, uncles and cousins who had all eyes on them as they left through the doors, weak smiles on their faces and ache in their eyes that was new.

She remembers how windy it was, and the sight of the prettiest ship she’d ever seen at the dock. She remembers this intimidating man with piercing narrow eyes and blue hair. Her consciousness would drift, but her last memory would be of seeing how suddenly far they’d gone from the docks and how they were on this gorgeous ship, and how the rest of their family was not; but they were there, gangly and skeletal, some toothless, some hairless, and watching Claudia from the docks. The situation hit hard and she felt frantic, but her mother held her tight in her arms as hot tears poured down onto Claudia from above, Máire trembling. Róisín was buried into her sister’s shoulder, other hand resting on Claudia to keep the frantic child still.

It’s an image the future Countess will never forget.

The voyage was long and tense, but there was food. A night came where both Claudia and Gelert had gained enough strength to move, to walk. It was so damn difficult, she kept falling as her legs gave out from under her, but she didn’t give up. She stumbled, she tripped, she dashed, and eventually she bolted gracelessly with her wolf at her side, rushing to the deck as her mind burned with determination for home - for family, but right as she grabbed onto the ropes to one of the dinghys, she’d had her first encounter with her father.

It was a cold conversation, and a shocking introduction to say the least. Lord Phantomhive wasn’t exactly warm, or gentle, he was very factual and very much to the point. Cold truths were dropped on a very emotionally fragile Claudia, and the biggest one made her heart sink into her stomach. It was a very uneasy interaction, but it was enough for Claudia to release her hold on the ropes as her aunt appeared and whisked her back to bed, shooting furious glances at the noble.

They docked, and Claudia woke in a new home. It was so small and cozy, but it was alien. She was on edge, but Gelert had approached her side in bed and comforted her as he sensed her thriving anxieties. Her body still ached, and her legs did their best to make her regret how she’d stumbled about the night before with no grace and no exercise, but she had no regrets - no matter how they hurt. She’d be bedridden a while longer as the situation sunk in with the information given by her mother & aunt through long, quiet talks to make sure Claudia absolutely understood everything that was happening.

They’d arrived in Winchester, Granwy; a small, relatively “new” wooded village on the map. This house was a small two-story, charming and newly built, and all theirs. This is where they lived now, and they had more than enough food to get by now. But they were in Britain. They were on English soil, and that was a very tough pill for all three of them to swallow. The sun outside was bright, but the situation was incredibly, incredibly grim, and neither could wear a smile for a long, long while. They could recover though, and their health would rise back up. No more hairless, no more aching stomach and aching body.

Claudia did recover in time and was back on her feet, feeling weightless as the situation sat like a heavy pit in her stomach. She would wander their spacious land, and settle beneath the biggest willow tree they had behind their house. Her situation had been explained to her when she was well enough, and it was, and is, a bitter fate to accept - especially since she never had choice or voice in the matter, her life was all at the will of adults: She got to be one of the three Ó Faoláins to survive the famine, but her future was already decided and given to the man that allowed all this to happen. He even told her a gist of it back on the ship that night;

“You’re the Heir to a powerful House of Nobility, Claudia. My Heir, to inherit the name of Phantomhive.”

Eventually the Lord Phantomhive would come for her in a year’s time, and when he would, Claudia would feel her body begin to tremble beyond her control as she’d stare long into the carriage. It looked more like she were stepping into an a black, endless abyss rather than some ornate transport glowing with polished wood. The gentle words of her mother and aunt would only take some of the edge off, but nothing could ever shake it. No loving word, no comforting gesture would set her at ease.

She’d dreamt about stepping into this exact same coach many nights before, and whenever she did, she fell down a dark rabbit hole rife with discord and animosity, smiles and leering eyes. Fire and ash. Shining silver and blood. When her feet touched solid foundation, it was an enormous funeral locket with her name on it - but there where there should have been her surname, there was a P.

It should have only frightened her, and it did, but the feeling much stronger than that was the wrath that burned in her chest. Not only did stepping into this carriage mean she’d be going into a mad world, but she would be forced to give up her name. That was truly traitorous. Her life had been damned the moment she was brought onto the boat.

But they wanted her here.

They wanted her to live, and to thrive. If she ran, she’d be dashing on sacred hope. She could be angry about this, and she will hold on to that anger something fierce and let it grow into a beast unstoppable, but she was going to accept something else besides that fury; pride. Loud, unfiltered Pride.

“Let her show them an Irish woman can run a House better than they could ever care to. Let her show them the true values of living. There’s no more stubborn an Ó Faoláin than Claudia. Let ‘em shake in the presence of a proud Irish woman. Let her at ‘em.”

The trembling in her body would begin to subside, and the tension in her muscles would begin to release, but all intensity had flourished into her eyes. Lord Phantomhive felt pure intimidation when his fifteen year old daughter glanced his way, looking directly into his eyes - but it felt like her gaze went deeper than that. It went through him entirely, right through his own soul.

“I’ll be takin’ your name Lord Phantomhive, but don’t you forget for one little second who I am. Until the I die and I lie rotting in the Earth, I am an Ó Faoláin.”

And with that, Claudia didn’t fall, but she strode her way right into the Abyss with her wolf at her side.

#【 hc. 】 ¦ the wolf of winchester. #writing.

[mxbumblepants-blog]

This is super long. It's a brief recap of how North Korea developed, and what is coloring NK's decision regarding nukes and diplomacy. North Korea's People's Assembly has voted to reinstate the Diplomatic Commission, which was removed from NK's constitution in 1998. This could mean that North Korea may shift more towards diplomacy, but there hasn't been any official announcements, and you never quite know what they'll do. Pursuing nuclear power is unpopular among North Korean citizens. However, it seems unlikely that either the feelings of North Korean citizens or the belligerent nonsense of 45 and his crew made this happen. The opinions of the general public do have an effect, but generally slowly, over time. Instead, it's sanctions that are making the leadership reconsider wtf they are doing. When the USSR still existed, North Korea was able to play China and Russia off of each other, and so North Korea was able to survive quite nicely off what the two other countries gave them. People actually used to marvel at how North Korea was able to feed all its people & provided them with other goods and clothing. Back then, North Koreans received wages that were essentially an allowance to spend at state owned places like restaurants and movie theaters. Such a thing had not been achieved before in Korea, and it was eventually a stark contrast to the situation in South Korea. After much drama (including at least one dictator we placed & kept in power there), South Korea eventually gained a functioning economy. Then the USSR fell, and that brought on the Arduous March - a truly horrific famine in the 1990s which coincided with Kim Il Sung's death. Some songs from that period have been banned because people will sing them defiantly as a symbol for the struggle they have now. Kim Il Sung was revered because the USSR set him up as a great war hero. The USSR set things up so that he could be seen as magnanimous, great at everything, and able to bring prosperity to his people. Koreans in Japan were invited to come join the new society, which seemed like a sweet deal considering how Japan had treated them (among other things, you can learn about "Comfort women" to get a sense of why North Korea hates Japan so much.) These people would move to North Korea prepare for an awesome new life, them discover they were trapped inside a hellscape, and that people were very jealous of any material goods newcomers had brought with them. Kim Jong Il couldn't get the same deal, though oodles of propaganda was churned out for him as well. He turned to the "Military First" strategy to maintain control. Support for the troops was super popular (esp. because NK has always dwelled on the war. It fills every facet of media.) Food was diverted to soldiers. With the military on his side, he didn't have to worry about much. Things got worse immediately, and when the famine hit, the government lost a lot of control. They could no longer provide rations for anyone, so started doing things like offering coupons for discounts on items at state stores - which even today stock very little outside of Pyongyang and the shops set up for foreign tourists. A generation had grown up isolated from capitalism, so they had to start from scratch developing an economy. Many felt disgusted about it, horrified that they were betraying their country's ideals by engaging in commerce - but when people are cannibalizing each other for lack of food, most aren't going to hold out. The government slowly developed rules for sellers, and a marketplace developed. Occasionally the government would replace the current currency with a new one, and would only exchange a certain amount of the old for the new. This meant that anyone who had over that amount would be unable to save money. The last time NK did this was a few years before Kim Il Jong's death. Coupled with bribes and many forms of taxation and fees (Including demands that citizens simply give money to the government), it was near impossible for anyone to get anywhere. A growing bribe culture gave citizens more flexibility, and lax laws let smuggled goods flow in easily. Most important were USBs with bootleg copies of South Korean Dramas. The USBs were easier to hide than videotapes or CDs, and many have had useful features such as appearing empty if people don't know how to look for the files on there. The shows got passed around, and most people watched them behind closed doors - especially teens and young adults. As young people asked at the markets for fashions and items they saw in the shows, sellers began following the trends - and thus South Korean culture seeped in. The most important thing here is that North Koreans finally got an unobstructed view of South Korean culture. And they saw for themselves how much things outside had progressed. They were told all their lives that people outside NK were suffering & dying to get in - but the dramas were damning evidence that this was not true. (Incidentally, this is why I think sending pamphlets by balloon over the Korean border is a bad idea. Citizens would get arrested if seen picking those pamphlets up, so no one is going to read them. Showy efforts like this are a waste. Sending in information and goods is what changes things. Supporting the sellers at the markets is the right way to go.) Kim Jong Un was no one's favorite. He was given a completely tanked economy and a huge corruption riddled morass of a government. His strategy was to push all senior people aside & put a bunch of 30 year olds in high positions. In NK, older people hold the positions of authority, so this was not well received. Kim's age was a problem too, but his propaganda folks dressed him up to maximize his resemblance to Kim Il Sung. None of this fixed the problems, so of course Kim did a purge & tightened the reins. Suddenly people found it was deadly again to cross the border. Under the previous Kim, the markets had developed a series of packages for defectors, ranging from swank to super basic. Daily NK had lots of communication with people inside NK, including anonymous officials. Some very brave people were given cameras, which they used to film inside North Korea. Most notable were a video of a starving boy picking up scraps of food from adults at a makeshift outdoor 'restaurant,' an exhausted woman picking grass for her family's rabbits (she was later reported dead from starvation), and videos of people being interrogated or executed. But after Kim Jong Un came to power, nothing was getting in or out. Meanwhile, different political factions have been hard at work the whole time. I might write about them in the future if I time to reacquaint myself with their names Kim Jong Un is not actually the sole decision maker (and neither were the previous Kims.) He can't step too far away from cultural norms, for instance. (And yes, having Rodman come visit was -very- poorly received). In addition, of he isn't careful, rivals to the folks who put him in power will very easily take him out. He does actually have to produce something in the way of results in order to survive. After the USSR fell, North Korea slowly lost all it's meaningful friends - except China. (NK is still friends with other small, dictator run countries with corrupt, command economies) So China has had a large amount of say in NK's decisions. In the past China has shut down stuff that was a problem for them, but otherwise they've been hands off and paid lip service to friendship between the two countries - and of course helping to hunt down defectors (which China refers to as 'economic migrants' so they don't have to sound as much like monsters.) And now China is unhappy. North Korea has been a failed state for quite awhile, and each time it gets worse. None of the current situation there is sustainable as is. So NK's government has to keep coming up with responses to the worsening crisis if they are to maintain control - and that is impossible now with how spreadable information is, and how much reality does not match up to propaganda. Some things to keep in mind: Women are the main breadwinners now because the men are required to go to state jobs (where they stand around doing nothing, since there are no materials to work with, and citizens would pay for quality at the markets rather than rely on low quality state goods even if rations were brought back. The women are free from that nonsense, so they can spend their time making money. Houses are currently valued by how nice the kitchen is, because that is traditionally a women's space, and NK women are now able to make major decisions because they are the source of income. And generally, when conditions improve for women, they improve for everyone. Also, North Koreans have electronics. They also have cars - although those are created only by the state, and so there are limited, expensive options that most people can't afford. Up until recently, the only news about individual citizens in North Korea was about how the country was a mysterious black hole no one could peer into, and how all the citizens buy every bit of nonsense their government puts out. This was never entirely true, and has majorly declined in the last few decades. There has been info getting out for at least a decade, maybe two. There is no excuse for journalists or news organizations to discuss matters about North Korea in a way that doesn't include how politics actually work there. The information is right there and doesn't require anything but time and basic internet access to learn. I learned all this from freely available sources in my spare time, and I don't have super secret access to anything. Basically, if anyone tries to feed you the idea that nothing we hear from NK's propaganda has any basis in fact, or that we can't understand or predict anything they might do - that's a load of bullshit (or lazy ignorance.) We can successfully follow the development of NK from it's founding to its present without handwaiving stuff and saying its mysterious.