#UGGGHHHH. GODDD

[mars-ipan]

ohhhhh my god cute girl at one o’clock

#marzi speaks #we’re at a princess diana-themed cafe (it’s good) #and this girl is sketching a photo of diana that was up on the wall #judging by her pencil noises i think she’s shading it #but she’s like. soooooo cute it’s absurd #like she was talking to the waitress who was complimenting the drawing and i looked over for a sec and she was smiling and. ough my goddd #also american accent??? hello? that’s rare here #i wanna compliment her cardigan or her hair or her glasses (they’re so cute) or if i’m brave enough her drawing #but like. i do not approach people lmao #felt so embarrassed tho. i was eating my burger that i put a shit ton of sauce on and girlie was messy #like the cute artist girl was not paying attention to me it was fine but. uggghhhh #and then i nearly spilled my drink. i didn’t it’s fine but. UGHHH #can’t help it tho she’s really cute. and kinda tall it seems #her accent isn’t texan but it IS american. i could ask where she’s from but that’d be weird i think #i doubt i will talk to her bc i am a Pussy but. helpp she’s really cute

[vanweezer]

ninth grade was so disgusting omfg there was this guy, who despite being 17 still made sexual jokes @ my expense (and dated someone my age at that :|) To My Face would purposefully touch my back/shoulders/hips when i said i didnt like how he would just randomly touch me

not to mention the ridiculous crush i was having on this person a grade ahead of me AND the menty bee bee i had while looking at myself in a mirror for a self portrait during art class. so tragic how i was just like that .not a single person who gave a shit either lol

#tw hrssmnt & very creepy guy mention #<- nothing SUPER serious but goddd he was so ANNOYING #which was sad bc we started out as cool w each other uggghhhh

[theabominableblogger]

My Reaction to “The Shape of Water”

Hoooo... my body is ready....

*scats along with the FOX theme*

“A Double Dare You Production.”  Del Toro created a slight breach of ettiquette by skipping the single dare and going right for the throat!

Oh this music is so pretty!

That’s it.  I’m downloading the OST like right now

“A Guillermo Del Toro film”  Wooooo!!

They made this movie with only a $19.5 million budget and holy crap it looks amazing

DOUG JONES!!!

I would love to live in Eliza’s apartment, oh my gosh...

WAIT, IS THAT “THE TEN COMMANDMENTS” ?!?

OK, there’s a timer... oh my Gooodd no way...

I mean, at least they address it in not a negative manner.  You do you.

DO YOU EVER JUST DIE INSIDE AFTER SAYING A THING?!?

“Time is but a flowing river to our past.”

I like how roomy and kinda cozy Eliza’s apartment is.

The dude [Giles] has two different sets of glasses...

Shirley Temple!

*Eliza starts tap-dancing in the hall*  Oh my gosh I love this movie already

Boy, there is only one “s” in “Mardi Gras.”  Do you not know French?

I love how much green there is in this movie.

These sets are great

This movie just used the term “What in the Sam Hill.”  That’s awesome.

Michael Shannon!

*in best Zod voice*  I WILL FIND HIM!

Did they use whale noises for the Asset?

All the old cars!  All of them!

Wait, is the Richard Jenkins character crushing on the cashier at the pie place?  Oh my gosh, that’s cute.

What’s so wrong with the key lime pie?  Personally, I don’t like pie myself but was there a reason it kinda looked off?

Ginger Rogers?

That horse suit looks horrifying

The colors in this movie are great.  I love when movies are color-coordinated.

It’s like del Toro’s been reading my movie wish list.

That’s an odd looking soap dispenser.

Why is Strickland peeing right in front of them?

“A man washes his hands before or after tending to his needs.  That tells you a lot about that man.  He does it both times?  Points to a weakness of character.”  That’s some insane troll logic

“Short people are mean.”  To quote my sister “Well we are closer to Satan”

Is that... Strickland...

WHAAAA DID HE LOSE HIS FINGERS?!?!?

Oh my God, there’s so much blood!

ARE THOSE FINGERS?!?!?  OH MY GODDDDDD

AAAAAHHHH!!!

If everyone’s being so secretive about the Asset, why did they leave him in a tank out in the open for Eliza and Octavia to see?

“It’s not bad, isn’t it, for being shit.”  LITERALLY MY MENTALITY WHEN IT COMES TO DOING ART

THIS MOVIE IS SPEAKING TO MY SOUL OH MY GOD

“That’s the future now:  green.”  Soylent Green?

The prosthetics on @actordougjones look freaking awesome

Did the Asset just fold some of its fins back to look more human to Eliza?

*signs along with Eliza when she says she’s cleaning*

DID THEY SEW HIS FINGERS BACK ONTO HIS HAND?!?!?  OH MY GOD NO WHY?!?!?

“All those scars on your neck...”  They look like gills...

Michael Shannon’s American accent is actually really good, I gotta say.

*The Asset signs “egg”*  Oh my gosh....  :D

Oh my gosh, all the yellow!

Everyone in Strickland’s family is super gravitated toward Strickland and it’s super uncomfortable

Noooooo....... NOOOOOOOOOOO.....

Oh thank God, the scene’s over

Aaahh, he [the Asset] just said hello!

:D

They’re eating lunch together... this is unbelievably cute...

*uncontrollable smiling*

Oooohhh wipe transition!

Wait, is that Russian?

Yellow!  Yellow again!

Why are the Russians interested in the Asset?

So is Eliza always late to her job because she has to spend time with Rosie Palms?  Now that’s commitment.

Shoot, the egg!

Oh crap, it’s Strickland!

*flinches when the Asset gets electrocuted*

Wait, so the Americans want to use the Asset to win the Space Race against the Russians?

Why do I recognize the guy who plays General Hoyt?

Oh, Dmitri....

I really gotta applaud Sally Hawkins here.  She’s freaking fantastic in this movie.

“When he looks at me, he doesn’t know what I lack... or how I am incomplete.  He just sees me for what I am, as I am.  And he is happy to see me, every time.”  That bit of dialogue is amazing.

Oh crap, it’s not key lime pie.  Something’s up.

Oh, the cashier’s both a racist and a homophobe.  He no good to anybody.

Oh, that’s a nice Cadillac...

I like how they made all the cars look super shiny in this movie

*jams out to “Chica Chica Boom Chic”*

Are those pain pills?

“I [Strickland] keep thinking about you [Eliza].”  EEUUUGGGHHH NOO!!

God, what a despicable character [Strickland]

There’s a poster that says “Loose Lips Might Sink Ships” in the locker room

Strickland’s reading a book called “The Power of Positive Thinking”

Is Dmitri gonna help them out?  Yay!

Richard Jenkins freaking out over the Asset is totally me

Ahhhh, not the Cadillac!

The dude at the Cadillac dealership called Strickland a “man of the future” and his Cadillac- the sign of the future- was just destroyed.  I see what you did there, del Toro.

It’s probably just me, but I can tell it’s definitely Doug Jones in the fish suit.

He just has these really meticulous hand movements and the way he kinda tilts his head to look at things is also a give away

Aaawwww, she got him [the Asset] a card!!!!

What does “MP” stand for?

I like that all the drawings of the Asset are done in charcoal when all of Richard Jenkins’ other art pieces are done in color.

How come no one is commenting on how smelly Strickland’s hands at this point?  They sewed the dude’s fingers back on and they already establish that his hygiene isn’t stellar so shouldn’t he be suffering necrosis there already?

SHE TOLD HIM “EFF YOU” IN ASL!  I AM LIVING!

*The Asset finds Giles’ charcoal drawings of him*  That’s it.  You convinced me, movie.  I gotta do some art for this.

Is that Mr. Ed?

Yes.  Yes it is.

DON’T EAT THE CAT!  DON’T EAT THE CAT!

HE ATE THE CAAAT!!!

Crap crap craaaaaappp!!

Wait, the dude that plays Dmitri is also in Doctor Strange!

That movie’s gotta be “The Ten Commandments”

Oh this whistling music!

HE’S PLAYING WITH THE CATS!  OH MY GOD!

LET HIM PLAY WITH THE KITTIES!

What?  He’s glow in the dark?

What is he [Strickland] eating?

Oh my God is this it?

OH THEY CUT?!?

“Why you [Eliza] smiling, hon?”  Cause she went and got it

*Eliza tells Zelda that the Asset has a junk*   AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

OH MY GOD I’M SCREAMING!

ZELDA’S FACE OH MY GOD!

Ooh, is that marble cake?

Let the man enjoy his cake!

Is that Gilligan’s Island?  Nope, nevermind.

YELLOW!

*Strickland tries sniffing his fingers*  OHHHH, WHO CALLED THE NECROSIS?!?

That’s right, me about fifteen bullet points ago!

AAAAAAGGGGHHH!!!

Noooo they’re flooding the bathroom to do it!

They’re gonna be flooding the theater below!

Oh snap, he [Giles] has hair!

They gonna do it underwater?!?

BOY [Giles] NO DON’T GO IN THERE!

Close the door!  Thank you!

It’s raining....

Strickland’s secretary must be putting up with the mightiest of bullshits from him

This movie really likes to foreshadow Strickland dying at the end of this movie

YO HIS [Strickland’s] FINGERS ARE BLACK!  YOU ARE NOT IN A GOOD SITUATION, DUDE!

Why did they sew his fingers back on in the first place?!?

“Life is but the shipwreck of our plans.”

Awwww, he [the Asset] smiled at her!

TELL HIM [the Asset] YOU [Eliza] LOVE HIM!

*jaw utterly drops during the dream dance sequence*

Please tell me somewhere in the production notes, they said “OK Doug, you gotta be able to dance in the fish suit.  Now go!”

My sister:  Definitely an improvement on *in best Guillermo del Toro voice*  “‘Happy birthday, Doug!  We’re gonna string you up by your balls!’“

*claps hands after every word*  THAT IS HOW YOU DREAM SEQUENCE!!

Uggghhhh, that was so good!

PUT HIM [the Asset] BACK IN THE WATER!

The sound design for this movie is really good too.  Like holy crap.

*imitates Michael Shannon saying “Shut up”*

*beat boxes to the windshield wipers*

Wait, did they [the Russian agents] just shoot Dmitri?!?

*Strickland comes to the rescue strangely*  Oh wow, OK.. oh my Goddd!

*Strickland sticks his finger through the bullet wound in Dmitri’s cheek*  AAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHH!

OK, Michael Shannon needs to play villains like this.  Pronto.

*actually screams* OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH MY GODDD!

Did he [Strickland] just leave his fingers on the floor of Zelda’s house?!?

*Giles and the Asset say goodbye*  Aaawww....

*You and me together*   Ohhhhhh my Goddd!!!

*Strickland shoots Eliza*  NOOOOOOOO!!!!!

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Boy [the Asset], get back up!

Whoooo, go Giles!

Whaaaaattt?!?!?

*The Asset slits Strickland’s throat*  Whoooooooo!!!!

Oh, wait, this is the scene with the shot!

[The Asset kisses Eliza]  *softly* Damn....

Oh my gosh, that hug!

[slowly melts to the floor] *softly, with feeling*  That was such a good movie!

#the blogger reacts #the shape of water #tsow #tsow spoilers #Guillermo Del Toro #doug jones #sally hawkins #michael shannon #american sign language #*incoherent whale noises* #eliza esposito #the asset #and not one strickland joke related to back to the future #NO MCFLY HAS EVER AMOUNTED TO ANYTHING IN THE HISTORY OF HILL VALLEY! #richard jenkins