#I keep thinking back to the emily dickinson class I took & that 'alex' author lady from nim's island

[disastergay]

‘am I agoraphobic’ update: I am not, in fact, afraid of leaving my room or going outside. the thought of doing so doesn’t get me worked up or all that anxious. it just so happens that the moment I leave my room, my lungs forget how to store oxygen. 

so yeah, probably :/

#personal / #vent / #it's definitely tied to social anxiety #but the reason I know it's not 'just social anxiety' is I get just as anxious if not more when there are *no* people around #I know the correlation of agoraphobia in autistic and ADHD people is unusually high so it's really not much of a stretch #I keep thinking back to the emily dickinson class I took & that 'alex' author lady from nim's island #I'm not that similar to them iirc but ngl it'd be nice if I never had to leave home #a couple times a day I get this uncontrollable urge to cut off everyone I've ever known ~for safety~ #whether it's mine or theirs idk yet