#I don’t even need to go in today

[mattodore]

yeah my best ocs of all time ever

#they’re SOOOOOOO 🧟🧟🧟🧟 COME HERE ALL OF YOU RNNNN #river dipping #ts4 #theodore doe #imani haut #echthroi #dionte duval #delphi sol #lykos #dovy legacy #attilio dovy #matthias evanoff #threw a pic of matthias in here too even tho i realized while going thru his tag that like. i have NO good edits of his face #attilio is a gameplay sim so i wasn’t surprised that i didn’t really have anything good for him #but matthias is literally in my username????? and i don’t have a SINGLE cas edit like i do for the other three mains???? #i had to use a random screenshot i posted recently for matthias like HUH???? WHAT???????? #clearly i need to make one of my usual little cas edits for him this is crazy #maybe i’ll do that later today if i end up needing a distraction #also my gameplay preset for attilio is SO sexy every time i see it #i use two different ones that i made—one that’s red vs. one that’s blue #i posted his legacy months back like early on in my little simblr career but even tho it’s been agessss i haven’t edited #his gameplay preset at all!! like it’s just that good i love staring at it #tho i did switch over to sunblind for my lighting mod and i need to remember to switch back whenever i get around to his legacy again

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

oh my god oh my god oh my GODDDDDD i can’t BELIEVE i found these on my little rainy october thrift shop wander this morning. like, one would have been more MORE enough. but both?? at once??? i am quite simply floating and may never touch back down to earth

#obviously given that it was second hand i don’t know if alex’s autograph is legit #but from my (untrained and overly hopeful) eye it looks very much like it could be??? #anyone who’s more expert in these things feel free to weigh in!! #and the photo book #aghhhhhhhhh #i have been wanting to get my hands on a copy for AGES #there’s something so special and atmospheric about matt’s photography that i’m just obsessed with #and to be able to actually look at them in physicality all together like that is truly something else #i also love that it’s designed like a passport obviously because of the whole album concept #but also because it truly does feel like a little glimpse into their world when they were making it #god what am i meant to do with the rest of my day after this??? 😭 #(put the humbug album on and look through the photo book of course. and maybe even a little fic writing if my heart rate slows enough) #god bless whoever donated these and whatever luck allowed me to find them today 💜💜💜 #i was in need of a bit of a pick me up and by god did this go above and beyond #sorry for how nonsensical all of this has probably been #i’m just #i’m feeling a lot rn 😭 #arctic monkeys #alex turner #lulu posts

[g0thsim]

187.24 / 390 (08/12/22)

[full original post]

im a trans person trying to get all her pieces of identification updated so applying to / working jobs + going to school is easier. pls send accommodating workplace energy to me <3🏳️‍⚧️♿️ tysm for rbing

ⓘ this is turning into an urgent situation so if this gets to $250 i’ll take the hit for the rest because i am out of options at this point.

ko/fi other options [carrd]

#share your dollar #trans crowdfund #maybe even less than $250 im literally looking D-7 right in the eye #bc ​i really need a job but I literally can’t emotionally go through the process without having my name match id again #i quite literally cannot go through life without my name atp #to keep my posts from being long I don’t mention it but like this is very important to my health rn bc I need a healthcard just like so many #things are on hold because I don’t have a name and I refuse spend money on passports and other expired id just to pay for it all over again #that would just put in a position to need to crowdfunded again but with a biggest goal yk #new post because despite the numbers on the og the last donation was in July #and it was a singular donation for that whole month #hehe I’ve been crying about this today :0((( like my family calling me a freeloader and going on about they were able support themselves at #18 even though our situations are so fundamentally different like you literally didn’t have to deal with the cost to live in your own body #in terms of my like they didn’t have to pay for disability aid or pay to not be deadnamed etc like

[corseque]

I want to grow an enormous amount of strawberries so badly it is causing me physical pain. I need a strawberry plant that I can endlessly clone into infinite strawberries right now as soon as possible

#I made a raised garden bed out of pallet wood and planted it today #but it didn’t even start to scratch the fixation I’m going through #It’s so cute though I labeled the plants with rainbow popsicle sticks I’m so happy #But I need to build an enormous strawberry pyramid or something I’m going crazy with the gardener’s lust #I’m going to a farmer’s market tomorrow and will stare in the face of those who have also created and summoned food from air molecules #the way plants grow is so fucking wizard man I can’t understand it even slightly #they’re making the invisible part of themselves and growing enormous #I don’t understand anything

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

is it not hard to just wear a mask? or call out if you don’t feel well? “oh i only felt a little off” wear a fucking mask or call out i don’t give a shit. “it’s not that big a deal” if you go out somewhere sick with no safety measures to protect other people you need to know you could potentially kill someone and i know this because people close to me have died because someone wasn’t careful when they got sick and went out and spread it

#my birthday is in 6 days and i was just informed one of my coworkers yesterday had early symptoms and tested positive today #i have 4 tests at least so i’ll probably test tomorrow afternoon (that’ll be 48 hours) and then again friday morning #im just tired of this. ‘i didn’t feel that sick when i went out’ I don’t give a rats ass #if you’re even feeling remotely sick and can’t get out of going somewhere you at minimum need to be fully masked up #if you go out sick and didn’t mask i hope it stays on your conscience forever #I hope it haunts you every day that you could’ve ended someone’s life #and i mean that genuinely. i hope you never escape your thoughts that you could’ve killed someone #coronavirus

[tamagotchikgs]

my mom said my cats cant live with us in the trailer which . i just can’t do that man i cant live w/o them they are my only reason for getting up everyday,..... they’re the only thing i have irl that makes me smile or feel any amount of joy or anything whatsoever. i wonder if i could get my own used trailer too,,,,, i was looking & there r RVs for 12k,, if only i could get hired somewhere maybe i could afford it by summer :(

#im still probably going to kill myself hving to go back to my childhood . there is no escape #it never ends its always there & it’s always rotting me away #even my therapist agrees i need to get as far as i can #but i never can. #also #i got turned down from the other cafe i was trying to work at a month or so ago #ive been trying to ignore it to not fuck my mental health into a spiral but i do hav to face it I guess o(-< #there’s still the bubble tea spot I’ve been trying to get my resume to since they opened #but i checked my resumes today and something pink spilt on them o(-< #and i have no way of printing new ones #unless i go buy usb stick and pay to have them printed at staples or something but i. don’t have any fucking money #they really make it as hard as possible huh

[jasontoddenthusiastt]

Observing peoples reactions to morally gray or black actions committed by different characters is so funny. Throughout all of G. War the character tags were chock-full of people unironically enraged claiming “Bruce isn’t even capable of doing something bad like that.” about an action that is pretty well in line with his character journey thus far, meanwhile there are still new posts that gain traction that open with lines like “I know Jason has committed his fair share of sins/crimes but” like bro when. In 2010?

Also. The whole premise of the b*tfamily™ that you so love is built on the load bearing wall being that they are a crime family. Hell, do people just collectively forget the part where Bruce manufactures and freely uses weapons with his own furry brand logo plastered all over them, causing all sorts of 'explosions and more!' property damage all over the streets of Gotham? Pretty sure that makes him a terrorist but you people don't feel the need to go around reminding fandom of that every five minutes.

#as someone who loves post crisis Jason more than the average person who considers themselves a Jason fan: #how much longer are we going to pretend that’s still where we are today #to all the people who get so fucking worked up anytime Jason does something other than sit there and look pretty #what exactly do you want to see him do in comics anyway? vacuum his apartment? #like please let him fuck shit up for people whose plans were messed up anyway please let him have opinions and act on them #kelseethe #these people assume fans like Jason *despite* all his ‘wrongdoings' #when we repeatedly post about why Jason fucking with people was epic and cool and justified #while they sit there being upset that their traumatized problematic fav with a god complex #acts like a traumatized problematic bitch with a god complex lol #‘do Jason fans even know why they like his character’ seems like someone is in need of some introspection #disclaimer: l'm not a bruce anti. you know that liking a problematic character doesn't mean wanting to erase #every atrocity he committed and putting him through a redemption arc #I just have low tolerance for the utter ignorance of some of his fans lol #and that of his writers who market him as the agreeable voice of reason #while simultaneously portraying him as an abusive father + war criminal lol #the way I used the terms ‘morally gray/black’ here is subjective. #personally I don’t consider killing drug dealers/kingpins in a fictional universe morally gray because I’m not a fucking narc lol #but abusing your son for over a decade then literally breaking his brain is undeniably morally black in & out of universe

[adashofniallandasprinkleoflunacy]

home from work

#if I speak… #one of the girls walked out yesterday #the best worker we have is on the verge of blowing up on this bitch’s leaders bc since he can do everything quick and efficiently already #they’re putting 3 to 4 ppl’s workloads on him to see how far they can extend his worth and then they’re over his shoulder the whole time #micromanaging him so today he almost lost it and was literally walking around mumbling about his disrespectful they all are (facts) #and how if they don’t think he’s doing it right then they can do it and I know for a fact one of the ladies heard him #bc he wasn’t even trying to hide it at this point and like this dude is cool he has a lot of patience and helps out any way he can #so if HE’S on the brink of snapping then the rest of us don’t stand a chance LMFAO #anyways today was a fucking mess those leaders know nothing about our store yet so they have us making less than what we need until we need #it so we get behind constantly and they made prep a disaster bc again they think they can just prep a bunch of stuff in the morning #and it’ll last the whole day and yes that works in theory but the reality of the situation is every day is different and today #we sold double what we did yesterday so they had to move me to prep to fix their mistakes bc we were running out of stuff 4 hours in lmfao #and I’m the only one left who knows how to do everything on prep bc the other girls had never done it before #we’re supposed to prep 20 mac n cheese trays in the morning for the whole day #we open lunch at 10:30 tell me why I go into the cooler at 12 put more in the oven and there’s only 5 left #it’s been less than 2 HOURS and you’re already running out of macs which means those idiots prepped barely anything just to try and save mo #*money to cut down waste but that gag if you’re losing money bc now you’re short on everything and customers are leaving bc they’re having #to wait a long time for their food #and macs take 40 minutes to cool LMFAO #I get over there they’re out of parfaits they’re out of fruit cups they’re out of kale salads the front is coming in and having to take #stuff as I make it bc they keep getting orders and it’s all just a fucking mess #I have to make a custom wrap and what happens?? those morons didn’t pull the flatbreads out of the freezer like they’re supposed to every #night so now we have no flatbread and I had to run back there and put them in the warming drawer to defrost and we lost an order bc I had #nothing to make the wraps with <3 #I go back there to get more cold chicken SPOILER ALERT they didn’t have anyone make any this morning so now there’s no chicken for the wrap #and salad and it has to be grilled and then chilled for 2 FUCKING HOURS before it can be used #they’re a fucking disaster like 😭 #was the store perfect before?? ofc not but it ran quickly and efficiently as it should and now it’s literally just a mess #this bitch hasn’t even owned it for a full week yet and has already fucked it all up #womp womp!!!!!!

[knackeredforever]

We like to talk about reading comprehension a lot on this site but no one in the history of humankind has worse reading comprehension than the people who were convinced to join the military because of the metal gear games.

#like these people played the games where literally every character rants at length about how becoming a soldier ruined their lives #and someone sees that and goes WOW WAR IS AWESOME SOLID SNAKE IS SO COOL I WANT TO KILL PEOPLE WITHOUT REMORSE GOD BLESS AMERICA #congratulations you have somehow missed the point of one of the most unsubtle anti war series ever made #if you watch the mgs2 GW patriots censorship codec call that’s just before the final boss #and don’t immediately want to destroy the us government for practically letting exactly what GW is describing happen today #or at least think deeply about it in anyway something is wrong with you #also mgs has been calling out video games being used as a propaganda tool for getting people to join the military since mgs2 #and especially mgs 4 which is crazy when mgs4 came out in 2008 and call of duty has been getting even more propaganda heavy as the games #go on #sorry for the larger amount of tags I’ve been thinking about this for a while and I needed to rant about it #mgs #metal gear solid #metal gear

[why-the-heck-not]

hate hate hate the feeling of turning in a part of an assignment and being hella embarrased abt how it is :3 like, feeling someone’s just gonna email me like ”hey?? what the fuck ??? what are u doing here this is garbage” like yeah dude i dont know what to tell you, things did not go well this week

#doing one that’s like a bigger thing but has weekly deadlines #and this week hasn’t been good for that so it’s like very fucking pathetic of how little I got done #and it’s all basically shit anyways like i know it doesn’t work and won’t work with the way I’m going about it #also I’m only submitting the previous version bc i don’t even fuckin know what’s going on with this current one #like the code’s all bad and all over the place and I have no clue where i’m trying to go with it #so it’s like i basically didn’t get shit done this week #only made myself more confused #i need to take a step back and like really fuckin think what I’m going to do with this bc it’ll just get worse if I just keep trying to go #with this shitty thing i have on my hands rn #and also im like over an hour late already bc gotta write a weekly report and idk what the fuck to say like #’’oops sorry dude it’s shit rn i have no clue what’s going on but also dont have anything i could ask help with bc im too confused so it’s #just uhh this thing now; a mess <3’’ #the way i’ve been handling this course like ?? uh oh will i ever have the audacity to step a foot to my campus ever again lol #yes im now writing this to procrastinate writing that weekly report thing #ughhh yes im hella positive rn all is shit #(also there was parliamentary election today and it didn’t end well so that might be why everything feels 5x more shitty rn) #april 2023 #2023

[avpdpossum]

an unstoppable force (my moral objection to working in a psychiatric setting because i know the abuse that so often takes place there and i can’t stand the idea of ever participating in or benefiting from something that treats people that way) meets an immovable object (i made the mistake of being a psych major years ago so now those are the most common jobs in my area that i’m actually qualified for and i need money so bad if i want to get out of the hell house i live in anytime soon)

#i have an interview today and i feel so guilty for even applying #but FUCK i need money #i just need to move out of my shitty transphobic neglectful parents’ house #and then i’ll be closer to jobs that i don’t despise the idea of doing #im going to keep applying and looking for better shit but i hate that i might have to do that for any amount of time #but honestly i don’t know if there’s really even anything else for me to find atm #i WILL quit on the spot if they ask me directly to do some fucked up shit tho #like i’ll suck up being in that setting temporarily so i can get out but i will not actively participate #god i hate it here #going back in time to tell my past self that being a psych major is such a bad idea and i’ll just come to hate the field #poss.speaks #vent #personal #anti psychiatry #psychiatry critical #not avpd

[rapidhighway]

I didn’t go to sculpture again……

#please please please I have anxiety I have a mental illness #I can’t make myself go there it’s hell idk why I’m just so nervous every time I make myself feel sick #and then I get another excuse not to go becuase I literally feel like I’m gonna throw up #I’m not going to pass if I don’t start going there……. #and I cannot handle repeating a semester #I live in fear #and it doesn’t help that I have intermedia class later today which is my second greatest enemy and just as dreadful #banging head on the table #I need to be wrapped in a blanket and go to sleep forever #god even if I go there I’m never going to be able to come up to my prof and talk to him about my project I get physically I’ll at the #slightest suggestion from my friends that I should finally do it #everyone’s done it already #I will literally cry if anyone talks to me #the profs just intimidate me so badly I feel like they hate me #and everyone says they’re super nice but I can’t make myself believe ittttt they will eat me alive #but if I never go I won’t pass the class and repeating the semester will cost money #pleas I have the stupid project idea ready but I just can’t do it I’ve thought about just emailing them and doing it all through email but #I couldn’t do that either I’m just in panic mode instantly #so yeah I’m just venting not asking ppl for solutions 😶✌️ I just don’t want to text my friend again bc I’ve been putting way too much on #them #they do practically everything for me anyway bc I can’t do shit by myself #uh ok I just need to put this SOMEWHERE #I’m gonna curl up and draw metal or whatever #ugh I know I’m making things worse by not coming #but I can’t make myself I just cant I’m gonna have an anxiety attack ✌️ #no one look at me #I being sensitive and vulnerable here

[spirit-of-the-hollow]

I want it to be on this blog somewhere

TW: death, terrorism

Moscow is mourning today. This night, more than 60 lives were taken by camouflaged men in Crocus City Hall. 3 of them are children. There are more than 120 people hospitalised. More can die. All of them were innocent civillians.

Moscow is mourning today. All public events are cancelled, if not in mourning, then for safety reasons. Universities and schools have cancelled classes.

Sources differ, but it is generally accepted that about 20 armed men in camouflage went into the building, killed all security, and started firing towards people. There was also a concert going on, which meant there were more people around than usual. The terrorists later set fire to the mall.

The top floor has collapsed due to fire.

Moscow is mourning today, and I am too.

#stop terrorism #russia #crocus #crocus city hall #terrorism #tw: death #tw: terrorism #i need to talk about this. #i really do. #don’t expect more of this on my blog #this is a one-time thing #i am sincerely sorry for all the victim’s families #i feel so fucking down #the entirety of moscow feels so gloomy today #i’m sure someone will unfollow me #let them #they’ve touched moscow #fuck them #i don’ even know who ‘they’ are atm #there’s a lot of theories going around #no one knows what’s true yet #i have to remember #and i will #fuck this #sorry for the slight rant

[lesbianfakir]

Sorry for being so rambly today (and last night) I have thoughts so onto the blog they go

I feel like part of the joy of art is in community, like you create something and you get to talk about it and share it with the world. This year I lost touch with the friends who I would always talk about art with and I think that loss is heavily impacting my ability to create (and the enjoyment I get from it.) I miss having a new idea and getting to ramble about it excitedly. I miss texting people the sketches and the mock ups and the color palettes.

I got into art for me. I wouldn’t show anything I made to anyone for years. So I’m no stranger for creating for the target audience of myself. Still, I miss that sense of community. I love this blog and I absolutely adore the lovely comments you all leave on my art but sometimes it feels so one-sided on here. I post a piece, I receive a lovely tag back and that’s it. End of story. I spend hours and hours working on something and it kind of disappears into the void in a day or so.

Trying to put it into words, but I think I wish I could create art that starts a conversation. That inspires people to create their own things in response, or even just talk with me about process. I think the perfectionism has gotten out of hand lately because I feel like I’m missing something—which I attribute to the quality of the piece—but really what I’m missing is buddies to chat about art with. There is no level of being “good enough” that will serve as a substitute for a real community.

#ahaha if you can’t tell I am a very introspective person #and a lonely one the transition to college has been rough and all my friends are back home #anyways I was thinking about drawing more stuff for my ocs today #and then I remembered the friend I loved to talk about them with hasn’t replied to me in a month #which is understandable. she’s busy. she made new friends. she’s not struggling like I am so it makes sense that she’s just kind of moved on #but I miss her #I had no chance of making it to her in group because all her friends she met through dance and I can’t dance for shit #I don’t even think she meant to ghost me but who knows #it sucks that I won’t get a real goodbye #anyways all of that to say I was going to draw my ocs and then I got so sad because who would I even share them with #there are a few art groups on campus but I have anxiety and mild agoraphobia and when I try to go I just feel awkward and shy #anyways if anyone ever wants to chat about art #it’s only one of my fav things in the whole world #lea talks #WHY CANT I BE A PROPER TORTURED ARTIST #WHY CANT I TURN MY ISOLATION INTO SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL #WHY DO I NEED SOMEONE ELSE TO BE PRESENT IN THE PROCRESS #is it not enough to descend into a quiet madness on my own and create from that??

[songtwo]

idk i think my bf might be developing a drinking problem and i just don’t know what to do…..

#it’s been going on for a couple of months now but he promised he would stop and he had been doing well until today…. #and it’s like. on one hand i never wanted to be w an alcoholic and i told him straight so he promised it would stop #but on the other hand i can’t just abandon him #and it’s like we used to go out a lot and party but like. that was it but ever since he met this guy he just gets lost when he drinks w him #and the thing was he got like aggressive like he didn’t do anything to me and i can’t really explain it but he just wasn’t himself #and like. we talked about it a million times and it’s not like it happens every week #it’s been like 5 times since december #but 3 have been on the past month alone #and two weeks ago it got bad like he almost got into an accident #and like i’m not even physically w him anymore like we really only see each other once a week since i moved #and from the very first time it happened i told him i couldn’t be w him if it kept happening #and after that incident two weeks ago he swore it was the last time but it just happened again #by the way he and that guy get wasted it really is a miracle they get home alive #and like. idk what to do #i really don’t want to be w someone like this #and i hate feeling like this like if i were to think only about myself i don’t want this i hate feeling like this #but i also can’t abandon him #like not even bc i would miss him or whatever i just wouldn’t feel good leaving him alone #but like i don’t want to live like this #maybe i’ll ask for some time to just figure things out #but it’s gonna suck so bad bc we were supposed to see kendrick lamar next week and then we already had plans for his bday and omfg #i don’t wanna leave but i don’t want things to be like this either #and i asked him to stop and gave him multiple chances but idk #i just don’t know what to do #i love him endlessly but i need to put myself first but i can’t abandon him:( #and our 1.5 anniversary was also next week….. #but i think time is the sanest and safest thing right now