WHAT COLOUR ARE YOU? / Atem Zakaria
orange
and icarus said to aphrodite- so this is what i'm for. you have a distant awareness that the day you fall is the day you change. change is so very difficult, isn't it? watching everyone leave? you want the light so desperately, but you fear it. one day it will come for you. one day you will stop mourning the future and start mourning the present, and it will be peaceful.
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muse aesthetic ; feelings. / Atem Zakaria.
BOLD : always applies. ITALICISE : sometimes applies. STRIKE : never applies.
ANGER : jaw clenching. hands balling into fists. teeth grinding. yelling. going nonverbal. stuttering speech. rushed speech. slow, concise speech. rambling. quiet. arms crossing. shaking head. tearing up. animated. expressionless. projects. internalises. vents. withdraws. passive aggressive. direct. physical outbursts. verbal outbursts.
JOY : easy smiles. fighting back grins. suppressed laughter. loud laughter. giggles. chuckling. smirks. whole body laughs. covers mouth when laughing / giggling. throws head back when laughing. slaps leg. touches people around them when laughing. looks down when laughing. looks for eye contact when laughing. sparkling eyes. bubbly happiness. quiet, subtle happiness. obnoxious happiness. wants to spread joy. quietly savours joy.
SADNESS : crying. bottling it up. seeks distractions. wallows. meditates and processes. avoidance. seeks out comfort. withdraws. talks it out. internalises it. sad smiles. depression naps. uses alcohol. uses drugs. seeks out sources of joy. fidgets with sentimental item. sits in silence. broods. gets moody. wants someone to share the misery. tries to hide negative emotions. nurtures others to make themselves feel better.
EMBARRASSMENT / SHAME : blushing. looking away. rubbing at back of head. covering face. laughing nervously. laughs it off. overthinks. lets it go. self - deprecating humour. deflects. gets irritated. smiles. withdraws. crossing arms over stomach. crossing arms over chest. hands in pockets. shoulders sinking. shrugs. falling into silence until comfortable again. talking a lot to compensate.
GUILT : avoiding eye contact. shoulders sinking low. head hanging down. crying. chest aches. lashes out. internalises. apologises. deflects. communicates. withdraws. grand gestures for forgiveness. accepts fault easily. punishes themselves. martyrdom. victim complex. over - active guilt complex. healthy conscience. internalises even after forgiveness. seeking redemption. moves on easily. denial. lack of guilt / conscience. sorry they got caught more than caused harm. can’t handle knowing they hurt others.
FEAR / ANXIETY : trembling. crying. uses sarcasm / sass to cope. rambles. goes silent. gets angry. fidgeting. clenching jaw. picking at nails. chewing at lip. pulling at clothes. adjusting jewellery / clothing. swallowing thickly. eyes widening. over - reacts. under - reacts. calm. logical. panic. irrational. overthinks. carefully analyses. talks to themselves. breathing exercises. flight. fight. withdraws. fawns.
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