#'that idiot never eats their meals because they're stupid and bad at time management and never listen...'

[merakiui]

fwb scara........ modern college au,,, the two of you are paired up for the semester project, so at first you're only meeting for the sake of the coursework. scara would rather do it alone but, seeing as that's not an option, he deigns to trudge through this project with you in the best way he can. despite how bitter and annoying he can be at times, he is quite intelligent. he's just an ass about it. T_T he gripes and groans, but he (begrudgingly) pulls his weight.

you and scara aren't very academically compatible. where he prefers to work alone and without distraction, you procrastinate and party, claiming that these things help "boost your morale." you think scara doesn't have many friends here, but in his mind he's not going to uni to make friends. he's here to get his degree and graduate. yet somehow, for some strange reason, scara (who normally never budges and has no reason to budge for a classmate he hardly knows) allows you to talk him into going to a party.

there has to be some sort of post-nut clarity but for the aftermath of a grueling study session. there's no way he was so exhausted from working on the project that he willingly agreed to accompany you to this upcoming party. orz he must be losing his mind.

and he is because he hooks up with you at that party.

scara can't even blame it on liquid courage. neither can you, even if the both of you were just a little buzzed. perhaps it was the atmosphere? perhaps it was stress? he thinks so because, oddly enough, he feels so peaceful after the fact. as if all it took was a round of sex to momentarily numb the troubles brought on by a group project. weirdly, he doesn't regret it.

scara can't do love. even though he may occasionally contemplate how wonderful it must be, it's a troublesome thing. to love would mean to trust. to be vulnerable. to be open and honest. and not just with himself and his own feelings, but with another person as well. things scara is so unaccustomed to doing and being. but this... this is good. this is just physical. no pesky emotional attachments like love. just lust. just sex. he can do that. besides, once this project is over and the two of you go your separate ways, you'll never have any reasons to continue to meet up. this arrangement might be over by then. who can really say?

but you're both in agreement. managing the stress of this project by having sex... genius. it's great because he doesn't have to commit to anything or open any wounds. none of this means anything. he can fuck stress, annoyance, sadness, and more away. <3

so then why, months into the arrangement and on the cusp of finals, is he feeling much more than he intended? why does he feel so annoyed when you go out to parties without him or when you bring that irritating guy (ajax) along? why does he, who claimed that this was only ever loveless and physical, want it to be more than that? in spite of everything, scara hopes for the one thing he fears.

and he's not used to it.

#meraki mumbles #n/sfw #MOUCHEY OTL WAAAAAA i miss him #scara complaining to auntie nahida while he angrily cooks and packs a lunch for you #'that idiot never eats their meals because they're stupid and bad at time management and never listen...' #and nahida just smiles because ooooo he is so in love and he doesn't even realize it