#'are our kids alright' nero in 1.5...........

[flovverworks]

i even less have the words to describe my feelings towards shino (&akira) at this hour(today) but its ssooo aauughhh............did anyone listen to u in ur world? shino being so happy with the medal akira made LIKEEEE IM TEARING UP I WANT SHINO TO BE HAPPY SOOOOO BAAAAAAD HES JUST A LITTLE TEEN.......;_; isnt there a card story where he puts it in a treasure box or something too. i didnt dream that up did i. hes? what the hell......... that one card story too with mithra and they leave shino in some monster-infested area (because he wanted to get stronger shino i) and akiras worried out of their mind IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII need to reread his cards hes. i wanna read his bday card;_; hes so happy i adore that kid

#stardust speaking ! #i HAVE to continue rereading pt1 i need to get to the part where shino cries its so unreal #the parts with him n faust in pt2....oh im exhausted im going to bed #ppl looking out for shino is ssoooooooooo important to me #;_; neros 'are our kids alright?!' line in 1.5.......................................IM GOING TO BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

[nerocharou]

Why I Sometimes Hate My Brain

To start things off, I don’t know the english term for this, but in dutch we call it ‘Hoogbegaafd’, which literally translates to ‘Highly gifted’. And this shit pisses me off most in my life. Going to explain it now, so if you didn’t follow that, don’t worry.

Okay, so this 'Highly gifted’ stuff is really close to autism. (I’m going to call it HG from now on.) The only real difference is that HG people have an IQ above 130. (For those that don’t know, 100 is average.) It is so near autism, that those who didn’t really have the opportunity to learn, are often misdiagnosed with autism, usually PDD-NOS. Now, this is the shitty part. The misdiagnosed people are lucky. They get help. HG’s don’t. But to understand why HG’s need help, I’m going to explain the basics to you guys. (Warning; I’m just a 15 yr old girl with this shit, no expert, so this will be extremely simplified.)

Alright, so why do people with HG need help? Well, their brains develop differently. Literally. Their brains develop up to 1.5 times as fast as a normal human, and on top of that, in a different order. The normal brain develops from the back to the front. A HG brain doesn’t do this as neat. It tends to develop the logical parts first, and shortly after the emotions. And that is exactly it. Because their brains develop differently, their behavior, needs and emotions don’t really match their peers. And the older they get, the worse it becomes. They never fit in, and as they become older, they often start to realise that. Way too often, they become depressed, become so-called 'problem-children’, or cut themselves off of other people to the point not even their parents can get them to be open. And all these reactions have one, simple, yet terrifying cause; Feeling completely alone, in a world where everyone is living their lives so close around them.

That’s one problem. The other is possibly even more devistating. Expectations. I’m going to give a real life example of mine here. Important to know, I was diagnosed with HG a week or two earlier and about 10 years old.

Teacher; “Okay, who can answer this: What is 100 divided by 5? Nero?”

*Me, being competely caught off guard, “locks” down and is trying to think despite her extreme anxiety*

T; “Come on, you’re supposed to be smart. Answer!”

Me, trembling at this point; “uhhhh” (I had never learned those easy multiply rows before, more on that later)

T; “COME ON” *walks up to me+switches to a passive-aggressive voice* “You should be smart enough to answer this, aren’t you?”

This went on for like five minutes, and after that he gave the question to the kid next to me. Now, I am going to say something not everyone will agree with, but it wasn’t really his fault. He was a man whose biggest trigger was lying. And he, like so many others, thought 'Highly gifted’ meant 'Highly intelligent’. He believed at that moment I was lazy, and that me and my parents had made it all up. He could have done some research, but I think he acted logically with the knowledge he had. And this is why I said expectations were the real reasons behind the problems of people with HG. It doesn’t help either that HG-children seem wise. It is because our logical parts are more developed, and dominates the emotional part when we speak. Trust me, we aren’t. I mean, I still put a lot of things on my mouth, like a baby, and I am 15.

Beside that, there is the thing that HG people love to learn. There’s just one catch. They love to learn what they find interesting. So a bunch of words or a strict pattern isn’t going to work. There’s no depth to explore. This causes that people see them doing something they are passionate about, and then assign them something boring, and expect the same devotion.

For children/teens with this shit it is even less fun, because they like to be taken seriously. They want to talk alongside adults, who see them as annoying, too young, or just plain a pain in the ass. But they want to play too, just to stimulate their developing emotional parts.

And that is why I hate being 'hoogbegaafd’. We are never taken seriously, or too seriously. There are way too many people who don’t want to really pay attention to kids. And because they don’t, they don’t realise what a hell the childs mind is turning into.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I really wanted to get this out of my head.

# DISCLAIMER This is by no means completely accurate, and I am sure 'normal’ people have some of these problems too.