#//Never visits the Angel's Share on the worst days; he will Not risk Diluc or Rosaria seeing him like that

[dutybcrne]

            Part of why Kaeya has no qualms about rushing headfirst into danger and why he is so disinclined to go see a Vision-wielding healer has to do with his nature as Khaenri’ahn. While the traces of the curse bestowed upon his lineage is not as advanced as that of others, thanks in part due to his father, he still feels constant and sharper flares of pain because of it, especially whenever he delves closer/further in Abyss-infested areas and the longer he lingers near/around them. Especially whenever he uses his own Vision and/or has the effects of one imbued upon him.

            For this reason, most sensations people would find agonizing tend to be something Kaeya actively seeks out, finding typical ones do not register to him so easily. If he can find something that really smarts compared to what the curse makes him feel, that he can focus on instead of it, he can have some twisted semblance of coping and controlling his pain, in his mind. Especially if he can find ways to get it treated and actually feel the relief of such.

#//Uhh; have this #hc; kaeya #//Part of why he drinks a lot is do to this as well–given; it numbs him nicely #//The downside to that though is in feeling that temporary relief of said numbing; he will tend to go well past his limits in that regard #//And end up in a more relaxed state than he'd ever anticipate or intend to #//Mans can and will take torture without batting much of an eye; has even goaded treasure hoarders to do worse at times #//But that's usually when he goes hunting for metaphorical wasp nests to kick bc shit got Bad or he was in a shit mood to begin with #//10/10 prefers getting battered and knocked around than getting drunk on the worst of days; finds it much more efficient and cathartic #//His pain threshold has gotten so screwed up; even his own comrades are a bit freaked out by it; times they get to see it pushed #//The worst of his pain is centered around his eye; the rest thrumming throughout his nerves #//Usually feels a pulsing headache above all else; some days wakes up and his body feels alight along with a freakin' migraine #//Will he still force himself to get up and work? Ofc. even if he still ends up late bc of it; bc waking like that is No easy feat #//He's just lucky Jean trusts in his efficiency to cut him some slack (& bc she & Lisa worry and send Noelle with snacks & tea to help ) #//(Not that it'd help too much; but he does appreciate the sentiment when he starts suspecting why they did) #//Never visits the Angel's Share on the worst days; he will Not risk Diluc or Rosaria seeing him like that #//Not if he can help it; he even has emergency booze hidden in various places he can crawl off to including his office and his apartment #//Only someone who knows him well would be able to tell how bad things are–he is That intent to ensure no one else knows #//Esp since most folks would suggest he go to the Church for treatment #//He would never cancel on a day with Klee; even at his worst–though he might end up taking a few days off to recover #//Which he LOATHES; doing; but if it means spending time with Klee; he'll take it. And take his work home with him jic