#she was baffeled by wayne manor being bought because the bank owned the property

[yells-of-the-not-so-danged]

Batman: Gotham War was pretty BAD, but at least we got:

A cool scarecrow

a heartbreaking hug

fashion ✨

Scarface robin 💖💖💖

and the worst Jason face I've ever seen!

all for the low low price of the most poorly written batman I've ever encountered (tho granted i am new-ish to modern comics batman)

(spoilers below, also my descent into insanity)

HOW THE HELL DID THE BANK GET A HOLD OF THE MANOR, DID HIS PARENTS NOT PAY THE MORTGAGE??? EVEN THO THEY'RE *RICH*???????? IS THIS SET UP (poorly because it makes zero sense) IN ONE OF THE EARLIER COMICS??

WHY DID BRUCE-MAN BAT-WAYNE, THE AMN WHO IS AS INFINITELY RICH AS THE WRITERS WANT, NOT THINK, "OH! I'll JUST SET UP A FOUNDATION THAT SPECIFICALLY CATERS TO THE PEOPLE WHO FIND THEMSELVES IN HENCHMEN POSITIONS! I CAN, SINCE I'M BRUCE FUCKING WAYNE, SET UP A PROGRAM WHERE IF THEY ATTENDED SOME CLASSES TO TEACH THEM VALUABLE TRADES THEY CAN RECEIVE SPECIAL WELLNESS CHECKS SO THEY CAN SURVIVE UNTIL THEY CAN GET AN HONEST JOB! THE GOVERNMENT MAY EVEN DECIDE TO HELP FUND IT IF I PHRASE IT LIKE THAT!"

... some writers really do just want to write batman punching people, huh...

(edit: I'm adding more now that i've had a few more minuets to just... let it all sink in...)

LOCK BRUCE UP IN ARKHAM FOR BS HE DID TO JASON HOLY SHIT

CALL CPS FOR DAMIEN BECAUSE YOU KNOW FOR A FACT BRUCE HADN'T BEEN TAKING CARE OF HIM IF DAMIEN FALLOWED HIM HOME

DID HE REALLY JUST MAKE DICK THE DAD NOW??? HELLO??? CPS??? ANY MILDLY SANE THERAPIST??? PLEASE HELP???

also, what is Selina gonna do now?? am i really going to keep reading modern batman comics to find out???

OH GOD I HAVE EVEN MORE TO SAY

BRUCE IS UPSET AT SELINA'S PLAN OF STEALING FROM THE RICH BECAUSE STEALING IS A CRIME AND (most importantly!)

HIS PARENTS WERE RICH!!!!!

i am not being hyperbolic when i say i am screeming. I quite literally am, or was, because this. is. insane. and the more i think about all this the more confused and upset i get because WHAT??? WHAAAAT???? HUHH? WHAT????! I AM GOING FERAL

(please tell me the writers will pull bat-mite out their ass to retcon all this shit please [lease plzzzz )

(who the hell green lit this shit??? is it supposed to be absolutely insane??? is that the arc going on right now????)

WHY was the Vandal Savage plot line needed??? The rogues would have teamed up eventually, they did not need Savage to coordinate that and there could have still been a mole in Selina's crew. Then when the rogues finaly strike the Bats and the Cats could have worked together and then finaly talked things out ( if this was writen by a sane person)

also they kill Ra's Al Ghul of screen?? is he dead for good?? explain??

the more and more i think of this the more unwell i get.

YET ANOTHER EDIT:

it's been a month or two and only now has it hit me...

IS THERE JUST A GIANT LAZARUS PIT ON THE OUTSKIRTS OF GOTHAM NOW??????????

THIS BETTER BE PLOT POINT LATER OR I'M GOING TO RIOT

i also want to acknowledge Salina more; even though this was equally her story i barely talked about her and i am sorry. You deserve so much better Salina, both from me and from Bruce. You had an idea that would be considered good in the context of Gotham and what the writers were willing to humor

( even though had the writers been sane she could have offered my earlier proposal to Bruce, but sadly we don't live in that timeline U_U )

...Hey, how did she survive falling in the newly born Lazarus pit?? was she wounded enough that the pit healed instead of killed?? is that what we're going with here??

#also i got to entertain my mom by explaining the plot #she was baffeled by wayne manor being bought because the bank owned the property #also where the fuck is alfred?? is he dead?? vacationing??? #gotham war #batman comics #dc batman #scarecrow #jason todd #tim drake #damien wayne #selina kyle #scarface dc #the ventriloquist