yollering

[yollering]

in high school (10th grade, so i'd be 15/16, so obviously very different from college age), i had a teacher who's autistic and has OCD, and the first class of the year he always disclosed that to students, both to explain his own behavior (literally telling us 'if you're upset or stressed i cannot tell, please tell me' and 'if you see me walking down the hall tapping the wall that's a thing i do, don't worry about it') and to emphasize that he's understanding of the need for accommodations

he very clearly stated that if we were having trouble, he'd do his best to work with us, but we had to talk to him (again - he wasn't going to pick up on it), and always followed through

he was the best teacher i've ever had. a lot of that was that he was very accommodating - which wouldn't necessarily have required him to tell us anything, though i believe it did make some people more comfortable asking

but also as an autistic, knowing that he was like me created a lot of trust that i might not have had otherwise, and having an adult i could look up to who was openly and obviously like me also made me much more comfortable with myself

basically, if you're wondering how big the benefit is for students: on a large scale? hard to say. but on an individual basis, it can be huge

absolutely wringing my hands about being a professor with adhd like

on one hand, i would like to disclose that to my students. not in a “if i can do it, you can do it too” way but in a “if you have difficulties or need accommodations, know that i have been there and i see you”

on the other hand, being a first year professor and disclosing this to students does mean it may get disclosed to my dept chair, other professors, etc. and while that may not at all be a bad thing, it’s such a hard room to read.

#i'm putting this on this blog bc i'm saying things that could have people recognize him #and i dont want offline stuff connected to my main

[yollering]

I've been saying for some time now that when it's about ~eating healthy~, step #1 is "get calories".

"junk" calories are better than no calories. A few calories are better than no calories. Drinking your calories is better than no calories.

And diet culture refuses to acknowledge that on any level.

Hey! I saw your post on diet culture and fast food and wanted to know what you mean about "diet culture would rather us starve than admit fast food is an accessible food resource"? Could you elaborate? (sorry for the paraphrase, I'm on mobile.) Thanks!

So, I'm disabled in a number of ways. I struggle really hard with executive function, appetite, sensory issues, and pain/fatigue/brainfog that makes deciding on food, and then following the process of making that food very difficult on a good day.

I've always had food issues -- I've snuck whole mouthfuls of food I could not physically make myself eat into the bathroom to spit it out in the toilet because I'd been told I had to eat it. I've puked from the texture of food. And I've gone hungry because food that was prepared is food I could not eat, for a number of reasons.

I'm also really fucking poor. I cannot work a regular job anymore. Groceries have actively skyrocketed to the point where our household is spending less than HALF of what we should be for the number of people. The difference between buying a bunch of groceries that we may or may not eat before they expire or our tastes for them die and simply purchasing a meal from a fast food joint is literally just the cost of labor -- saving us from expending spoons on deciding, buying ingredients, preparing, cooking, and then eating that food, which I will again stress that we might not actually eat.

There's only so many times you can have Walmart brand chicken nuggets before you physically cannot choke it down again.

Diet culture has a huge focus on eating the "right" kind of foods as well as this weird "self-sufficiency" fetish for cooking that can be fine but has a bad habit of edging into ableism. If you physically cannot cook on a regular basis, for any reason, and you have a lot of fast food meals, you get judged a lot for it. It's labeled "unhealthy" and "lazy". I am often told that I just "haven't found the right recipes" or "cooking hacks". No, man, I'm just fucking disabled.

Personally, I'd label starving as more unhealthy than eating fast food, but people don't like hearing that you aren't willing to swallow whatever gruel society thinks people in poverty deserve to have.

For me, fast food is predictable, safe, filling, often less expensive, convenient, spoons-saving, and it means I will eat. I also just genuinely think a lot of fast food tastes good. Sure, it's not fresh veggies and fruits, but I'm not getting those anyway. When I buy groceries, it's the cheapest items possible which means a lot of frozen foods, packaged pastas, and cereals.

And this isn't even looking at food deserts where grocery stores are few and far between, but fast food chains are everywhere. Even my Louisiana hometown, boasting a population of 10,659 people as of 2020, has a Burger King, McDonald's, Hardee's, Wendy's, Taco Bell, Popeyes, and numerous pizza delivery places. Y'know what closed down though? The Piggly Wiggly, one of the more affordable grocery stores -- my grandmother actually worked there during my childhood -- and I don't think the Winn-Dixie is even open there anymore either. So all they've got is a Walmart.

Fast food is an accessible food resource, and diet culture would rather see us starve than acknowledge that.

[yollering]

ALSO “i know these teeth” is a weird line and they missed the opportunity to have him be like “old teeth?? that’s weird”

ok look. i am not caught up on doctor who, i haven’t even seen many posts about it the past couple years, i’ve been catching up since my sister let me log into her hbo max. i don’t even know what just came out that showed us that 13 regenerates into david tennant again. was it an episode? a trailer? a sneak peek thing? a leak? i don’t know and i don’t care. and i’ll watch it and i’ll probably like it.

i also think that it’s a bad move. “this worked so let’s do more of it” is a trap. a trap doctor who has fallen into before.

and regardless, it’s an enormously shitty move to announce that the next doctor is going to be a black man, one who famously plays queer characters, have people state that his doctor will be queer, making the first queer black doctor.

and then say “actually, first, david tennant again, in yet another suit”

[yollering]

ok look. i am not caught up on doctor who, i haven’t even seen many posts about it the past couple years, i’ve been catching up since my sister let me log into her hbo max. i don’t even know what just came out that showed us that 13 regenerates into david tennant again. was it an episode? a trailer? a sneak peek thing? a leak? i don’t know and i don’t care. and i’ll watch it and i’ll probably like it.

i also think that it’s a bad move. “this worked so let’s do more of it” is a trap. a trap doctor who has fallen into before.

and regardless, it’s an enormously shitty move to announce that the next doctor is going to be a black man, one who famously plays queer characters, have people state that his doctor will be queer, making the first queer black doctor.

and then say “actually, first, david tennant again, in yet another suit”

#dw #doctor who #also fuck you for not putting him in thirteen's clothes #like EVERY OTHER REGENERATION

[yollering]

it’s also created the whole Thing that streaming services do where they determine whether or not to renew a show very quickly, based solely (or almost solely) on how many people have watched all of it.

the audience assumes the creators can reasonably churn out an entire season all at once very quickly and the streaming service assumes the audience has nothing to do but watch an entire season at once very quickly, and it’s resulted in everyone (except the streaming services) being fucked.

"Drop entire seasons at once" television has fucking destroyed people's ability to be patient with television creators. Making a TV show takes a lot of time, effort, energy, collaboration, money, and resources. There has to be coordination between writers, actors, producers, board artists, background artists, character designers, animators, composers, musicians, editors, and countless others.

You can't just churn out an entire season in a month, and when seasons release back-to-back, it's either because they were in production at the same time, most likely leading to extreme overwork and labor rights violations, or were produced years ago and are only just now being released.

[yollering]

idk about y’all but i know for me (who was, for the record, good at math in school) it was because math was used as The metric of if you’re smart or not

like yeah sure, other classes mattered i guess, but really it was mostly math. if you were good at math you were smart. if you were good at english you were creative. unless you were also good at math, in which case you were just smart.

other subjects? nobody cared

math being The measure of intelligence, and intelligence being a measure of worth, does create an unhealthy relationship with math for everyone

Too many people have an unhealthy relationship with math.

I'm serious.

If people didn't fucking talk shit about math and how ~scary and hard~ it is all the goddamn time like they do about NO other basic fucking skill on the damn planet, I'm pretty sure most people would have a higher background level of numeracy, because they wouldn't be so fucking terrified of it or so foolishly convinced that it's just so hard that is beyond them.

[yollering]

so i've suddenly started getting ads for hbo max while playing mobile games

hmmmmm wonder if that has to do with anything (hbo max disappearing a bunch of titles and treating the creators of those pieces of media with no respect)

#hbo max #hbomax #im not gonna pretend i dont use hbo max #my sister has it and i use hers #the money has changed hands i may as well use it #but yikes

[yollering]

additionally the books aren’t considered canon the same way the shows and movies are. there are things in the books that directly contradict the main canon and each other.

the books are approved, they’re officially licensed, they are definitely star trek. but they are not canon like the shows are.

that’s why star trek has 2 (or more, i dont fucking know) wikis: memory-alpha (for official, canon star trek) and memory-beta (for licensed works such as novels, games, and comics).

The most annoying answer to any post about Star Trek must be "You didn't read the books" or some variety thereof.

No, m'am, I did not read the 850 official Star Trek books before making my shitpost here on this hellsite about Worf's dicks or whatever. While my insights on Klingon dickscourse might be contradicted by an obscure 1978 romance novel about Gowron and a Gorn - I'm actually fine with that.

#i'd put this on my main #but i worry that i'd get rude trekkies coming at me

[yollering]

since they’ve been focusing on making laptops thin, there’s a couple more things you have to consider that you didnt have to in the past:

ports

more and more, computers have fewer and fewer ports! for me, how fast my computer is matters less than “i need at least two USB ports” and “i still use wired headphones, i need an aux port”, so that’s what i looked for if you want a disc drive and dont want to use an external one.... good luck.

and a big one

locate the fan!!

my previous laptop had a fan... on the bottom..... this resulted in the laptop overheating like crazy because the fan was useless. that resulted in the battery swelling, which messed up the entire inner workings of the laptop (because it was gradual, it took me a long time to notice it! if you have a thin laptop and the touchpad starts being weird, your battery might be swelling!), which meant i had to replace it.

Shopping for laptops fucking sucks ‘cause I don’t know shit about computers. I’ve never had a computer with a functional webcam or microphone or the ability to play computer games made later than 2005 or a speaker that could play anything loud enough to hear from more than a foot away. How the hell should I know what I want?!

#going on this blog bc #on the off chance that people reblog it #i just dont feel like dealing with it on my main lol

[yollering]

And it’s very important to point out that “recently” means the 70s is generally considered the start of lesbian separatism, which is where it came from. What that means is that there are MANY people who have been calling themselves bi and lesbian, women who are attracted to all genders and have called themselves lesbians, etc.. since BEFORE THEN who are still very much alive. That was only about 50 years ago.

hii me again!

you reblogged a post that said

"bi lesbians are beautiful"

if you dont mind me asking, what is a bi lesbian?/gen

ive tried researching but i havent found much info, and im a bit confused

hope youre having a nice day! <3

Hello again!

One part of it is that "lesbian" has only recently been a word for women who are exclusively attracted to women. In the past and for most of our history, women attracted to men, women, and/or nonbinary people, have called themselves lesbians. Also, identity is complicated and sometimes gender and sexuality are messy. LGBT+ identities never fall perfectly into definitions and whatever words people find work for them are the ones they should use!

The #history tag on @bi-lesbian's blog may be helpful. Also, the #explanation tag could be informative.

Edit: the term did not originate from terfs. Please educate yourselves before spreading false info!

[yollering]

also if an individual doesn’t want to have a disabled kid? definite side-eye from me (there are legitimate reasons, and the individual choice is not my business) but whatever i guess. individual choice and all that.

the problem - and what was being talked about in the post that brought this ask - is it’s systemic. the society being completely disability free and clear statement: if someone in that society became pregnant with a disabled child, the child would not be born, it would not be their decision, nobody was disabled.

and this is happening in the real world. disabled people are encouraged to not have children. there are screening tests and doctors encourage people whose pregnancies were flagged ‘high risk’ for disabilities and ‘abnormalities’ to abort. iceland claims to have nearly eradicated down syndrome, with 1-2 born a year, who were marked as ‘low risk’ and ~slipped past~ the screening.

eugenics is still eugenics even if it’s via abortion.

if you don’t want to be pregnant you don’t want to be pregnant and that’s that on that

oh look! an ask that i absolutely knew i would get!

anyways, eugenics is still eugenics even if its via abortion

the question you need to ask yourself is why did the disability make you change your mind?

[yollering]

https://yollering.tumblr.com/post/655571258972553216/some-of-yall-are-truly-uncritically-transphobic ahhh were you talking about I Am J? I read that book as a young teen and it sent me right back into the closet and caused me to suffer years of internalized transphobia towards trans men specifically. (And I myself am a trans man so those were fun times!) What an awful book. It’s so incredibly misogynistic, too, and starts off that way just to really drive the nail home. I hate it

linked post

yeah i absolutely was!

we've posted about it on this blog before and when we read it our reaction was immediately just if we read this when we were the target audience, it would've fucked us up and i'm so sorry you had to actually experience that.

and the fact that you recognized it from what we said says a lot too, i think. that those horrible parts really are what stuck with readers who it was supposed to be good for.

it was a fucked up book! we have a physical copy of it and we have color coded tabs of the fucked up shit and there are way too many tabs

for those who aren't aware of this book: 1. consider yourself lucky, 2. check out this post where we took quotes right from the book because it really speaks for itself.

#i am j #cris beam

[yollering]

just a piece of advice we keep forgetting to give people:

if you’re becoming friends with people, especially a pre-existing friend group, and the phrase “we’re so close we have no boundaries” or anything similar is said

it may mean “we don’t respect people’s boundaries because we’re so close we think it’s okay”

i’m not saying it always does. but please, keep an eye out.

#abuse #trauma #boundaries

[yollering]

theres a book i’ve seen almost only positive reviews of that’s about a trans guy. Most of the negative reviews ONLY point out other issues (of which there are many), but still say “but it’s accurate trans representation”

it involves not only unsafe binding (not just not saying it’s dangerous, but only mentioning that it’s painful once, mixed into talking about the ‘positives’), but explicit instructions on how to bind with ACE bandages, the mc saying that he tries to stay skinny because “he’d heard that really skinny girls could make their periods stop” (this could have been done well, but it wasn’t ever mentioned again), and he looks at before and after images of surgeries and it says “The “after” penises were ugly. Too small, or huge and misshapen.” and is FULL of misinformation.

This (combined with all the other problems in the book that I’m not getting into right now because that’s not what this is about) is something that apparently a lot of people think is GOOD.

And until recently, it was one of two or three books with a trans guy character that I could find.

Some of y'all are truly uncritically transphobic toward trans men and it’s kinda disgusting.

I see y'all calling a trans guy’s chest “mutilated” or “gross” after his top surgery. I see y'all making fun of our voices, or the way we don’t (or can’t) pass, or calling our facial hair “neckbeards,” or making fun of our sexualities, or just because we’re existing as we naturally are.

Trust me when I say trans men see your infantilization of us and how you’ll treat us as broken women or how you’ll only recognize us but only when we’re able to be weaponized. Or how we’re erased from history and from narratives of trans liberation.

I see how our transness gets erased to call us gross for being men, or how our status as men is erased to call us confused, broken women.

Transphobia toward trans men hurts the entire community. An injustice for one of us is an injustice for us all.

Please reblog, but don’t belittle trans mens’ real experiences or our experiences with transphobia.

[yollering]

literally how this goes is just

queer people: i’m not censoring my identity, don’t follow me if you don’t like it

queerphobes: DO WHAT I WANT OR ELSE YOU’RE ABLEIST

queer culture is not respecting people who are triggered by the q slur 🥰🥰🥰

Hi. I've talked about this before - I have trauma with the word queer too. Respect is a two way street - I respect your trauma with the word and how you wish to deal with it, all I ask is that you respect mine by not dragging me into the dark place where "queer" is only a bad thing again. It is triggering to me to have "queer is a slur" shoved in my face.

But queerphobe culture is disrespecting boundaries and throwing triggering asks into queer people's inboxes, I guess 🥰🥰🥰 </sarc>

Anyway. I would have thought that it was obvious based on my previous post, but let's make this 100% clear - kindly don't bring this kind of thing in my inbox in future. If my identity is triggering to you, I won't take offence if you block me and blacklist the word "queer" as is.

I've been working hard to make this word into something positive for me and the people I care about. That's not something everyone can do or wants to - that's fine. I respect that. Recovery can have many shapes and forms. Just don't use that as a reason to hold back the recovery of people who can and want to build those positive associations.

#ps i say that as a traumatized autistic :)

[yollering]

in this same time period, we had ‘friends’ who were generally horrible people and we figured that out after a while, but they were fairly standard ace exclusionists (talk to people who are former friends of exclusionists, this seems to be common, and that says a lot about exclusionists). They literally told us not to sit with someone else in our class because “she thinks aces are queer”. We feared for the safety of a young ace kid in our school’s GSA because of them. we still can’t wear our ace pin on the outside of our jacket because we’re so scared of being openly aspec, because of them.

Exclusionists LOVE saying that “being made fun of online isn’t oppression” but those people exist offline too. these shitty friends we had were very active on here, yeah, and they were like that offline too. they don’t stop being abusive and hateful just because they’ve stepped away from a screen for the moment.

this pride, I’d like to remind everyone how thoroughly the aspec community was obliterated on here. I don’t think I’ll ever get over the whiplash of going from literally creating a tumblr to learn more about aspec identities and being so excited to finally have a place where I wasn’t broken—to watching the lgbt community and surrounding ‘allies’ utterly destroy what we had, watching blogs delete or quietly re-closet themselves, and being afraid to put anything regarding asexuality or aromanticism in my bio. I started blocking people once I started having nightmares

it’s still so hard to get people to take aphobia seriously, and ‘aphobe’ is constantly treated like a joke. I get anxious about mentioning my qpp in anything, I’ve seen how far people will go to tell someone their relationship is fake or ‘cringe’. sometimes it seems like noone remembers what it was like before, when we weren’t afraid. that we came looking for acceptance, and were thrown out on our asses for being largely neurodivergent.

I’m so glad we’re rebuilding, but I’ll never forget what that felt like. what it feels like

[yollering]

i know a lot of people have said that gordon ramsey ends up looking like a bad guy because of how the US shows cut things - they know viewers like Drama so they encourage it and keep almost exclusively the yelling in. and that’s definitely a factor

but there’s also something i discovered recently by watching uk kitchen nightmares that i hadn’t realized until then

gordon ramsey is english and says ‘fuck’ casually. how do i know those 2 facts are connected? because nearly every episode of uk kitchen nightmares i watched, everyone casually says ‘fuck’

so then he comes to the us and says ‘fuck’ casually and people take it as a massive insult and/or an act of aggression, and get defensive

to an extent, it’s just... cultural misunderstanding.

Awwwww