I FINALLY REMEMBERED MY LOGIN TO THIS FUCKING BLOG THANK GOD
4 notes
ยท
View notes
hi everyone ! if youโre interested in writing w/ me right now, iโve been on my multi @featherstcnes . iโm tentatively archiving this blog for now/will be inactive on here just because iโm hyperfixated on other fandoms. i still have muse, but not enough for a solo blog currently - most likely iโll have this up and running again after a re-read or when the show gets closer to s2.
tl;dr - iโll be writing nikolai on my mutli, @featherstcnes so follow me there ! i really do want to write more with him, so if youโre interested in plotting, iโll probably have a plotting call up soon .
2 notes
ยท
View notes
would anyone like toย โจ plotย โจ potentially bc i miss my boy and would like to attempt to write here again (or on dis.cord it doesnโt matter to me)
1 note
ยท
View note
casually brushes cobwebs off of this blogย hi
3 notes
ยท
View notes
hihi iโm still here ily all sorry iโve been so absent
4 notes
ยท
View notes
a little baby polar bear comes up to you and says "you deserve a BIG bear hug!! but since I am only a little bear, I'm going to give you a LITTLE BEAR hug!" and the polar bear gives you a nice big little bear hug to brighten your day.
this is so cute !! i've been saving this in my inbox for a rainy day but ty lil polar bear ! <3
0 notes
hi, everyone ! iโm going to do a mini clean up of this blog, so iโm going to be dropping most threads and cleaning out my inbox. i might be posting a plotting call this weekend just to get more plotted based threads going as i have the most muse for those. ty all for sticking with me even though iโve been mia <3 iโve been hiding reading all of the time after work which has been really fun so ! i will be back soon <3
2 notes
ยท
View notes
Morning Doodle: Heading home
516 notes
ยท
View notes
@euhnoiasโ asked:ย "you have a soft heart." โ from linnea? ๐ฅบ
ย ย nikolai had tried to be ruthless in his time as king. he knew when to push, when to let go. he knew when to challenge people and when to cut his losses and accept defeat. and yet, there were times when he knew when to let all of that go. when to brush of the persona of being king, of being in power, to just... be nikolai. and it was moments like this, seeing all of the life that heโd had no idea of, that felt as if he could just be himself.ย ย โ a soft heart? โย he asked, raising an eyebrow slightly as he looked at her.ย ย โ with all of those walls in the palace, itโs a miracle itโs still that way, i think. โย it was meant to be a joke, but in some sense of his words, it wasnโt. heโd kept walls around himself for so long, even from when he was young. what was meant to be a heart of steel still had some give to it. if nikolai could still give something, give anything, it was love.ย
meeting linnea, getting to know herย -ย saints, a sisterย -ย it felt like he could just forget about everything else for a while. he didnโt have to wear that mask of being king, he could simply be.ย ย โ if i didnโt know any better, iโd just think you were trying to be overly nice to me to get something out of me. โย a beat, that famous nikolai lantsov smile spreading across his lips.ย ย โ it might be working, though. โ
ย โง โ โ ruin and rising starters
1 note
ยท
View note
@solsnktaโ asked:ย you saved my life today.
ย ย the words from alina echoed in his mind as he looked at her, his features softening as he did so. he often wondered some days if she realized just how many lives she was saving, just by existing. just by trying to be the person that saved the world, that risked her own life to bring down the darkling. to bring down every small bit of darkness that littered the world because of him.ย ย โ it was nothing. itโs called luck, my dear alina. โย he said with a small smile, shaking his head before he looked off into the distance. a sigh escaped his lips, trying to find the right words.ย ย
โ you make me laugh some days. you talk of saving lives and yet youโre the one risking your life every single day. โย a pause.ย ย โ itโs kind of my job to save your life at this point. may as well just write up a contract now that says iโm legally obligated to make sure youโre alive and breathing at the end of each day. โย and if she wasnโt? well, he was sure that mal wouldnโt hesitate in making sure that nikolai was the one not breathing by the end of the day. still, he looked to alina with a smile, it softening slightly as a long moment passed.ย ย โ youโre helping everyone more than you realize. just you...ย ย doing what youโre doing. all of it. whether youโve embraced it or not, you really are a saint. โ
ย โง โ โ ruin and rising starters
1 note
ยท
View note
time for me to break for a little drive to get some coffee and to get out of the house for a bit and then !! i will be back to answer the rest of my memes <3
3 notes
ยท
View notes
@nczyalenskyโ asked:ย "i love you."
ย ย it felt like a lifetime that heโd spent with zoya by his side. a lifetime that could be reduced down to a few years. years, that heโd spent what felt like conquering the world with her. in the end, isnโt that what theyโd done? he could remember the days where heโd open his eyes, hands still trembling from transforming back into himself. those were the days that his first conscious thought was one of her. that had transformed into her being the person at his side every night, chaining him to his bed...ย ย until that had turned into her bringing him to the brink of death every time the sun went down. and now? she was his queen. a dragon. a monster to fit his monster. and somewhere, in between all of that, theyโd found each other. and here, in the darkness, in the moonlight that illuminated the stone banister they were standing next to, looking out at the palace grounds, he felt like he wanted to burn every single memory he had with her into his mind to never let it escape him.
ย ย there were certain things heโd never expected. one of them was those three words that escaped her lips, so sudden that he almost thought he had dreamed them. his gaze moved over to meet hers, a look on his face he wasnโt quite sure how to describe. it was the only thing he needed to lean in to kiss her, his hand moving to her cheek as heโd leaned her jaw up to angle her to meet his lips. it was short, but the kiss held everything he wasnโt quite sure how to put into words. pulling away and looking into her eyes, he knew it was an abyss heโd die to one day get lost in.ย ย โ i love you, too. โย he was sure that heโd never meant any words more.ย ย โ i wish you knew how many times iโve wanted to say that. how many times iโm sure you wouldโve slapped me for even suggesting that i felt... anything for you. โย there was a small grin at that, his hand still at her cheek before moving slightly to brush some hair behind her ear. as he pulled it away, he let his hand move down her arm before taking her hand softly into his. intertwining their fingers once his hand found hers, he let out a small, breathy laugh.ย ย
โ you sound a lot better saying it than you do in my dreams, you know. โย and there was that famous nikolai lantsov smile widening, his eyes focused on her.ย ย โ though, i have to say, most things you do are much better in real life than in my dreams. โย his mind started drifting to those very things as an arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer to him.ย ย โ say it again, zoya. โ
2 notes
ยท
View notes
@drakorolevaโ asked:ย i donโt want lies between us.
ย ย lies threatened to tear things apart bit by bit until there was nothing left. being in a place of power, in a place where one wrong move threatened to tear an empire down, there was no room for lies, not to people in positions that were just trying to help. and yet now, between them, it felt like the words held more weight than that. heโd always trusted zoya. heโd trusted her from the moment sheโd helped him from falling to his death. heโd trusted her in saving him every night that heโd transformed into the... unsettling side of himself.ย ย โ then thereโs no lies, zoya. โย the promise was in his eyes, a look that he hoped held all the words he didnโt say.ย ย โ and anyway, i think youโd be a pretty awful liar. โย there was a small grin that rose on his face as he spoke, tugging at the corner of his lips.ย โ iโd say i already know what you look like when you lie, but i havenโt quite picked up on all of your tells yet. youโre stuck with me, though. so iโll figure them all out eventually. โ
ย ย heโd always appreciated her brutal honesty, the way that sheโd speak her mind despite anything that was going on around them. it was something heโd learned to appreciate, learned to welcome in any conversation. suddenly, a piece of thread at the hem of his pants became the focus of his hand. his gaze locked on the fabric for a moment before he spoke again, looking up at her to meet her gaze after a long few moments passed.ย ย โย ย ----ย ย we donโt need to lie. โย he told her, gaze focused on her.ย ย โ i donโt want to. โ
โง โ โ ruin and rising starters
1 note
ยท
View note
@mrzostโ asked: you donโt understand. none of you do.
ย ย it was almost laughable, really. to think that a man with a plan to destroy everything felt like they were the ones to not understand. nikolai wondered for a bit what it might have been like if he had grown up next to the man standing in front of him. if he hadnโt left the grand palace and hadnโt lived his life in the army. if he hadnโt left and became sturmhond. if he hadnโt practically staged a coup right on his own ship to get alina and mal away and bring them to safety. some days, it felt like nikolai had a bit of a death wish, and yet he still pushed forward, still tried to make all of this make sense.ย โ donโt understand what? that you killing hundreds on hundreds of people was just part of your master plan? that itโs for the good of the people as a whole? โ
ย ย nikolai had always fought for ravka. but this? whatever plans the darkling had? this wasnโt fighting for their country. for ravka.ย ย โ tell the people that lost family that they just donโt understand. โย thoughts of the darkling, of the man in front of him, never failed to light a fire beneath him. it never failed to make him feel like he needed to do something to help, to stop this madness. and yet, he was just one person. but with alina? with the crew he kept around? maybe they had a shot.ย ย โ enlighten me, darkling. tell me what we all apparently donโt understand. โ
โง โ โ ruin and rising startersย
1 note
ยท
View note
ruin and rising, pt. 1.
dialogue prompts from ruin and rising by leigh bardugo.
you learn more by losing.
wouldnโt it be nice if we only got what we asked for?
you have a soft heart.
you blew something up without me?
the less blood on your hands, the better.
why havenโt you visited me?
you didnโt fail me.
eventually youโre going to have to talk to me.
be more careful.
i wonโt always be around to save your ass.
i donโt think i can do this alone.
i hope you werenโt waiting for me to be the voice of reason.
i keep to a strict diet of ill-advised enthusiasm and heartfelt regret.
i forgot how often i want to stab you.
itโs alright. be honest.
this is not some childrenโs story.
i donโt reserve my friendship for perfect people.
i donโt want your pity.
you donโt understand. none of you do.
now iโm just something for you to fix.
i am not ruined. i am ruination.
remind me to stay on your good side.
you saved my life today.
maybe you were right to be afraid of me.
wanting and deserving arenโt the same thing.
suffering is cheap as clay and twice as common.
i donโt want lies between us.
i miss knowing what happens next.
41 notes
ยท
View notes
ย ย the streets of ketterdam held memories that nikolai knew he wouldnโt forget anytime soon. the atmosphere, the constant volume of noise throughout the city, the smell of the harbor, the shop owners trying to lead people into stores with promises of goods that would suit their needs, it all fed into the atmosphere of the city that held just the band of criminals that he needed. it had been weird to adjust to things, really. not being king, being able to explore again, being able to just be nikolaiย ย ---ย ย well, it was a nice change of pace. he still helped zoya, of course. gave her counsel whenever she needed, but if anyone could lead ravka into a golden age, it was the dragon queen herself. as nikolai walked, he kept note of all of the landmarks around him, reminding him of exactly what he was facing. the hustle and bustle of ketterdam in some ways was calming, reminding him that everyone who walked these streets had a job. had some semblance of a plan.
ย ย when he saw the familiar entrance to the crow club, nikolai ducked his head a bit, moving into the crowd of people. some days, he wasnโt really sure how kaz kept this up, how he managed to simply keep a hold on all of the power in a city like this. for someone so young, heโd been playing his cards right his entire life, it seemed. in the crow club, time seemed to lose its meaning, the drinks flowing, people throwing away their last bit of kruge on a hand that they most likely would lose. nikolai had picked up some things from kaz, most notably picking a few difficult locks that had come surprisingly in handy during his time as king. but just like kaz, nikolai watched. and it was that very gaze that led him over to what he thought was a familiar figure.ย ย โ you know, as much as everyone says ketterdam is so dangerous, i have no trouble getting through the roads here. maybe your security needs to do... more securing. โย it was a joke, his teasing words paired with an upturn of his lips that turned into a wide smile.ย ย โ is this my warm welcome into ketterdam, kaz? i expected more pizazz. โย ย ย /ย ย @rietveildโ plotted starter
2 notes
ยท
View notes
my new theme and all of my graphics are from briar @villainsrph and once again, i am in awe bc everything they do is perfection.ย
3 notes
ยท
View notes