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Ugghhh, I booked an appointment with my GP like a week ago and said the best way to contact me was to text ('cause I knew I wouldn't have access to my emails). Never heard back and didn't get in touch 'cause I've had other things on. Just managed to check my emails and turns out I had an appointment on Friday. I had an email about it and that was it, no text or anything. I didn't even get a call or text reminder when I never turned up. I wasn't even available on Friday :(((
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I'm golden-child!Jason and not-even-a-silver-egg!Dick truther for life, and that's so funny.
Bruce is used to the chaos he calls his son, so when Jason actually behave, Bruce is soooo confused.
Like, what do you mean Bruce can tell him to not do something and Jason will??? Obey??? The order??? Dick would never.
Bruce, fully prepared for scandal: You are not allowed to jump from one wardrobe to another, it's dangerous for you.
Little Jason, who has no idea why he should: Ok? I wasn't planning to anyway.
Confused Bruce: You wasn't?
Little Jason who are scared to touch anything here, because it probably costs more than his life: I don't want to ruin the mansion...
More Confused Bruce: You don't?!
Or 
Bruce: so, you are saying that if I tell you to sit in your room and read books, you will really sit in your room and read books?
Little Jason, who has no idea why he shouldn't: Yeah?
Bruce, whispering to Alfred: I didn't know they could do that.
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Headcanon that when Jason so much as says “ow..” on the comms the rest of the batfam immediately assume he must be dying.
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Jason Todd
I do like characters who do not exhibit any hint of sexuality in any way because they’re too busy being tormented by the narrative. like “yea I might be gay or whatever but the labyrinth is growing so I can’t worry about that shit rn”
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Bruce is constantly asking the kids what they like to eat so he can freeze dry their favorites into oblivion as apocalypse rations
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what the actual fuck
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we did it everyone. we’re no longer allowed to talk about the CISGENDER MALE CHEST because it’s sexually explicit
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You can fight me on this, IDGAF, but "I'm not talking about killing Penguin, or Scarecrow, or Dent, I'm talking about him. Just him. And doing it because... because he took me away from you." is one of DC's most perfectly crafted short monologues ever. It sums up a whole character in a few, simple lines. It sums up Jason's motives, hopes, and pain.
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Fuck you Batman
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Damian: "Red Hood has a pretty severe concussion. What do I do?"
Tim: "Extraction's still ten minutes out, just keep him talking."
Damian, urgently pressing the comm: "I don't want to talk to him, he's even more insufferable than usual."
Jason, lying on the ground, eyes closed: "That's funny Junior, because head trauma's the only thing that makes you bearable."
Damian, to Tim: "I'm leaving. It won't be the first time we've had a closed casket."
Tim, groaning disgustedly: "Robin--ugh, seriously, just stay there and keep him awake."
Damian, seething even more when he sees Jason's smirk: "Fine."
Jason, cracking open one eye: "Aww, are you concerned about me?"
Damian: "Shut up. The only thing I'm concerned about is our family's reputation after your public wipeout on that stupid motorcycle."
Jason:
Damian: "Are you still awake?" *kicks him* "Todd?"
Jason, grinning: "You said our family."
Damian, furious: "I didn't. You've lost more brain cells than you could afford."
Jason: "Wait 'till Tim hears, I think he'll want a group hug. Bruce is probably going to get emotionally constipated. Dickie would probably cry--"
Damian, panicking as he hears the Batmobile get closer: "Stop. Do not tell him--"
Jason: "You better erase every single fucking video of me crashing then."
Damian: "You have a deal."
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Keeping Up With The Wayne’s but bc Jason literally cannot be there, they have like a little memorial shrine and when asked about Jason, Bruce is like,
“oh my son, my wonderful wonderful dead son, he was an angel a perfect boy the best possible child ever.”
Tim just makes snide ass comments like “Well he wasn’t that great, he was actually an asshole who would always drink the last of the coffee and not make another pot like your suppos-“ and Bruce would interrupt like “hahahaha timmy here never got to meet Jason.” before gently covering Tims ears and fake whispering to the camera “He’s always been a bit jealous”
in revenge, Tim put the batman cowl in Bruce’s bedroom before he gave a tour and Bruce had to say it was Sex Thing.
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You order a package off Amazon. When the Amazon delivery guy shows up to your door, instead of giving you the package you bought, he beats the shit out of you. Then, when he sees that you are not dead yet, he calls all of the Amazon delivery people in the area and they all proceed to beat the shit out of you. Miraculously, you survive. Another miracle: a friend in your neighborhood caught the assault on video. After a month of recovery and extensive hospital bills that you have no idea what to do with, the video has gone viral. You read the comments below. “This is what happens to people who fuck with Amazon!!!” Someone says. “I’ve never been beaten up by Amazon employees, and I’ve been using them all my life!” Someone else comments. Later, you start to see articles popping up about your story. They all mention that when you were 17, your license was revoked for reckless driving. In a Facebook post on your mom’s feed, someone is going on a rant about how not all Amazon delivery guys are bad, and that if you look really close, the “bad” ones are just stressed out. Your name is trending on Twitter. Jeff Bezos films a response to your attack, denouncing the video of you getting beaten to within an inch of your life by his employees as becoming “a symbol of hate towards Amazon.” The people who attacked you still deliver packages around your neighborhood. You saw one of them just yesterday as you were watering your plants. You still can’t pay your hospital bills. Your phone dings- Twitter again. “Maybe if you didn’t order from Amazon,” someone pipes up, “this wouldn’t have happened!”
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damian: why'd you shoot that man? i think he's dead
jason: he was pulling out his weapon
damian: what are you, a cop?
jason on the verge of tears: i'm so proud of you, but never compare me to a cop again
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An explanation.
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hey
hey friend
dont kill yourself tonight ok
you have a really pretty smile and i know its not always easy to manage one but itd be a bummer if we never had the chance to see it ever again
youre really important and you matter a lot so stay safe and try and have a nice sleep
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mentally i’m a slut physically i’m scared of intimacy 
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