tomsparkyr

[tomsparkyr]

my national anthem

[tomsparkyr]

mason mount x reader

summary: when y/n is wants to be more than fuck buddies but mason doesn’t want anything more

word count: 8,0k words

warnings! smut + angst. I guess you could say dickhead!mason too a little? might have some mistakes so I’m sorry about that

‘Why don’t you visit me anymore?’

You tried not to let it get to this point, but you couldn’t deny it.

You missed him

It was around 8pm and Mason was getting ready to leave training. He had a late training session, he was just coming out of the changing rooms before he froze when he heard your voice at the doorway.

‘What are you doing here?’ His facial expression shifted from neutral to cold, but knowing him that wasn’t much of a difference.

‘I wanted to see you.’ The changing rooms were empty. Everyone had left for the day, but you kind of memorised Masons training days so you knew that he would be here right now, otherwise if he wasn’t, it would’ve made you look like a complete fool.

If it wasn’t for the security guard letting you in, you’d still be standing like a lost person in the parking lot, but you refused to go another week without seeing him.

Mason took a deep breath to calm his nerves before closing the locker door where he kept his belongings. You had caught him at the right time because his coat was already on and his training bag was in his hand, ready to head out of the door.

At least until you showed up.

He sighed before putting all of his things down and walking over to the bench and leant against the bench, not sitting down and crossing his arms. Unfortunately, he knew he would now be longer than he had to, and the way he looked at you indicated that he wasn’t happy about it.

‘You shouldn’t be here,’ his voice is stern. ‘Is there something you need?’

Sheepishly, you walked over to him, gently pressing your hands against his t shirt. ‘I waited for you last night,’ you whispered, looking up into his eyes. ‘You didn’t call.’

Mason’s jaw twitched at the feeling of your hands on his chest while making sure he stayed rested on the bench behind him to keep his composure. You caught him off guard and the tension in the air didn’t help. He managed to maintain his professional persona but maintaining his emotional distance was the real challenge.

He quickly understood what this was; the consequences of an impromptu decision he made in a moment of weakness that had finally come back to haunt him.

This was bad. He looked past you to the rest of the empty changing room, making sure there was no one else in sight and no one to catch whatever it was you were about to do.

‘That was a one-time thing,’ he didn’t even bother to look at you as he spoke. ‘We made a mutual agreement, remember?’

‘Then why did it happen more than once?’ You said breathily, sensually sliding your hands up to his shoulder

Mason took a deep breath and finally looked you directly in the eyes. ‘It wasn’t supposed to,’ his voice is low and serious.

It was Friday night, your night. The only day of the week when he would knock on your front door in the middle of the night and relieve his built-up stress from the seven days prior. And you gladly helped him.

You were his secret; Mason’s beautiful guilty pleasure.

Eventually, one Friday turned into two, then four, then eight. No one could tell you that what you two had wasn’t chemistry if they saw the way you lusted for each other. They’d notice the way he held you on the edge of the bed, or the counter, or the shower wall. Or they’d bring up the love marks that hardly got a chance to fade throughout the week before he was back on you, darkening them.

How you wished they heard the noises he fucked out of you echo down the hall, followed by the thumping sounds of the bed frame banging against the wall.

Unabashedly, you did anything just to please him, just hear him say your name between grunts. In public, in private, AM or PM, when he called, you came running, even if it was something unimportant.

For one day out of the week, you both belonged to each other and no one else.

That was until he stopped knocking.

You stepping closer only made it harder for Mason, both literally and figuratively. He could feel the heat of your breath against his skin intertwine with the rush of being this close to you after so long. It was agonizing, and he only had himself to blame. He let himself get swept away by desire, knowing in his heart that a relationship with you was something he could never have.

‘You're only going to get hurt if this continues.’

‘I don’t care.’ Wrapping your hand around the back of his neck, you pulled his face closer to yours. ‘I want to see you.’ You hovered your lips over his.

A taste is all he needs

A small spark to jog the memories of the pleasure he felt when he was with you, memories that he tried so hard to move on from.

His lips brushed against yours. He could feel your desperation and your scent alone was enough to make him go back on his word.

Reluctantly, he let himself lean into your touch. Your noses grazed each other, and you gave his cheek a light lick. Mason shuddered. Breathing heavily, he closed his eyes, melting into your embrace, like it was second nature. For a brief second, he placed his hand on your waist, before he quickly pulled away.

‘It was a mistake,’ he exhaled, coming back to his senses.

You frowned. ‘It wasn’t a mistake the other night.’

Your hands slid back down to his chest, but Mason grabbed your wrists before they could go any further. His eyes said more than his lips could. It was heartbreaking how loud they begged you to let him go.

But yours only begged him to stay.

Mason released your wrist and stood up straight, subtly pushing you off of him. It was impressive the way this man reverted back to his professional demeanor without missing a beat.

“I can’t keep doing this with you,” he spoke firmly. “This will only hurt us both in the end, and I know you don’t want that.”

“If I cared about that, you think I’d still be here?” You try to step closer to him again, but he brushes past you and strides to the front door.

“Please leave… I’ll pay for your uber if I need to.” He’s trying to be as gentle as he can, hiding his inner frustration in knowing that he so badly he secretly wants you to stay, but he could never say that. “I won’t ask you again.”

The silence was strong.

You didn’t speak, nor did you move. You simply stared at him, taking in the features you used to touch yourself to whenever the right side of your bed was empty. It was all there in front of you.

Your eyes couldn’t help but gaze at his lips, remembering how they felt against your skin. Then his hands, remembering how they pulled you closer to him. Until your eyes found his, remembering them never leaving yours even when he was inside you.

Especially when he was inside you.

So you didn’t move. Better yet, you walked over to the washing machine that was in the corner of the room and sat yourself on it, locking in your decision.

You weren’t going anywhere.

Mason clenched his jaw, his controlled expression turning into one of anger as he aggressively made his way towards you. Instantaneously, he placed himself between your legs, towering over you with a menacing glare.

The way he said your name sent a shiver down your spine. You were small in comparison to his tall frame. He would have no problem forcing you into submission, but still, you didn’t budge. It almost excited you.

Neither of you said a word, but this time with more conviction. He's trying to intimidate you out of the changing rooms and out of his life, while you only invited yourself in.

His furrowed brows didn’t soften until you reached for his hand and placed it over your heart without breaking eye contact; It was beating at a steady pace. Only letting your heart speak, you subtly told him he didn’t scare you, and he caught on.

With one final attempt, Mason bent down to your eye level and rested his long arms on either side of you. His face was inches away as his brown eyes peered into yours. It was like he could see right through you. As if he could read your every thought and predict your every move while he waited for your heart rate to spike.

Still, it was calm.

It wasn’t until he tilted his head a bit to the side and grazed his nose against yours that he felt your heart rate pick up in his hands. Mason knew exactly what that meant and he cursed internally at it. The thought of his lips on yours was enough to change your breathing.

For a moment, the two of you practically breathed each other’s air; Your lips almost touching, almost willing to give in.

‘One more time. One more night,’ was all you could say. Your voice trembled, barely above a whisper. ‘Let me make you feel good for one more night please.’

Mason opened his mouth, prepared to oppose your proposition until you cut him off. It was a simple reminder, but in this moment, it meant everything.

‘It’s Friday…’

Hearing those two words mixed with hurt and loneliness, Mason’s chest throbbed. A look of pity washed over his face. The tension between the two of you was now one hundred percent physical.

There was a long pause as Mason looked down at you, struggling to make a decision. His heart was pounding inside his chest, and he felt a sense of desire that he had not felt for a long time, at least, not for anyone else.

The worst part about it was you weren’t going to take no for an answer. He knew the consequences of what you were asking him to do, but in your presence, all of his good judgment seemed to disappear. It’s how he got here in the first place.

Before he could stop himself, he spoke. ‘All right,’ he said in a low voice, finally placing his hands on your hips. ‘One more time.’

Without warning, Mason placed his lips on yours for the first time in what felt like an eternity. A breathless moan left your throat on instinct. You waited so long for this, to feel him again; which is why you wasted no time slipping your tongue into his mouth and pulling him closer, lacing your fingers in his hair.

Mason groaned at the touch of your tongue lapping around his; his body shivering slightly as you teased and tested his resolve. Your presence was so enticing, so intoxicating, he could feel himself losing control of the situation.

His senses filled with you and it only brought up more feelings he dared not name.

For a moment, Mason parted from your lips, trailing his mouth to your ear and below. You couldn’t help the little noises that escaped your lips as your lover bit, licked, and kissed your neck, and it wasn’t long before he was getting more and more uncomfortable in his slacks.

A wave of excitement coursed through Mason’s body as your hands undid his belt with swift motions. The room filled with sounds of your heavy breathing followed by the sounds of his belt buckle clinking as it came undone. His hands explored you, grazing your calf, grabbing your thigh, going further and further up the fabric of your dress, and feeling nothing underneath it.

You planned this. This is what you came for and he knew it.

Mason hissed when his fingers grazed along where your underwear should have been. “You’re going to kill me,” he muttered under his breath.

‘Mason..’ you whimpered, wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders as if he could disappear at any moment.

‘Shh,’ Mason whispered into the crook of your neck, causing your skin to tingle. You could feel the deep vibrations in his chest. ‘I'm right here.’

Mason slowly moved your dress further up your thighs exposing your ass to the cool air. The sensation of his short nails pressing into the skin of your hips accompanied by his mouth finding its way back to your lips once again was intoxicating.

“I missed this.”

A shiver ran down Mason’s spine as he pulled the spaghetti strap of your dress off your shoulders, leaving your full breasts visible for him to see.

"I did too," he whispered softly, like he was afraid to admit it. You heard him suck in a breath through his teeth as he saw your uncovered chest. "So, so much." He couldn't help but grasp the soft flesh; the tent in his pants growing impossibly tighter, even with it open and undone.

He was so damned deprived, so pent-up, he didn’t realize he was sucking your tits like it was his last meal.

Even in this state, Mason knows he never should’ve let it get this far. This wasn’t part of the plan, but damn it felt good, caressing and pinching one while kissing and sucking the other one, as he always did.

Your arms supported the extra weight he was pushing against your chest as you leaned back. Biting your lips, you squirmed against his tongue on your perky nipples as you held onto his scalp.

‘Then why are you trying to leave me?’ You practically whined. Despite everything that was happening, you couldn’t let it go—let him go.

Even when he agreed to have you once more, it wasn’t enough.

‘Because you deserve better,’ he growled, his free hand squeezing your ass. ‘Someone who can give you all the attention and affection you deserve.’ His mouth kissed its way back to your neck, his lips grazing against the soft skin and leaving a trail of saliva in its wake.

‘Mason..’

‘I don't want you to get hurt,’ he continued, his voice full of emotion and longing. ‘I don't want to hurt you, I promise, but you have to understand that I'm not suited for this.’

‘Not suited for what? Affection? Love?’ Even without the extra stimulation, you couldn’t wrap your head around his words.

He was kissing you and tearing you down at the same time.

Mason is charming and intelligent. A handsome, successful footballer who makes more than enough to support himself, and anyone else he chooses to be with. He was the kind of man who turned heads and made you feel like the only woman in the world when he was with you.

Mason Mount is the definition of perfect, so what about this is so wrong?

‘I'm not capable of...those things.’ He looked up at you with pleading eyes, but still managed to kiss you before continuing to remove your dress and tossing it to the side. ‘I won't waste your time trying to pretend I can give you that. In a nutshell, we are just two people looking for some relief, and this is our avenue for doing so. That's all.’ His words were blunt but cut like a knife.

That’s all this is?

You were stunned. Before you could process his statement, he lifted you from the washing machine and gently carried you to the chair across the room where he had more space to move.

Once he sat you down, the warmth of his hands left your skin for a moment as he backed away.

You had a front-row seat watching Mason loosen his t shirt.

The lighting was dim, but you didn’t have to imagine how he looked unclothed; Every part of him was already etched into your mind. You had no shame eyeing his smooth chest, muscular arms.

His muscles flexed as he slid his shirt off, tossing it onto the floor before leaning down and positioning himself between your legs again. His hands gripped the armrests on either side of the chair, caging you in, with his face barely inches away from yours.

‘Speak. I know you want to say something.’ He was challenging you. Mason knew that whatever reason he gave you for not showing affection would never be enough.

It was your last chance to do so.

Your heartbeat betrayed you. It wasn't fair. Who was he to decide what’s best for you? You’re supposed to be angry and hurt, yet here you were falling for the same things in him once again.

‘That’s not all this has to be, Mason,’ You struggled to look anywhere but his lips.

‘You don't know what you're asking for,’ he whispered in a husky voice. ‘I can't be what you want me to be.’

Mason’s eyes wandered below your waist for a brief moment. His expression betrayed his words, not hiding how badly he wanted you. He was topless, belt unbuckled, pants unzipped, while you were under him, legs open, vulnerable, and completely naked.

This was exactly what Mason didn’t want to happen. He was drawn to you and everything he was saying to resist you felt like a lie, yet he couldn’t help but find it all so tempting. Everything you did gave him flashbacks; the looks, the sounds, smells, he was losing his cool with each passing second.

You shivered when he gripped the sides of the chair tighter.

‘And what do you think I want you to be?’ You trailed your hands down his abdomen. Mason flexed underneath your touch. Feeling him pin you against the back of the chair, you were desperate to feel more of him, impatient even.

Mason debated whether he should speak, so it started off as a whisper. ‘You want me to be yours. You want me to be your boyfriend, but I can't give you any of that. I care about you, don't get me wrong, but I can never love you the way you deserve to be loved.’

Suddenly, all the air was knocked out of your lungs. It was as if you’d been hit by a truck.

Could he truly read you that easily?

Without missing a beat, he was back to slowly trailing his mouth along your neck and shoulders, placing small kisses on the warm skin like he was kissing a wound. Unfortunately, it aided nothing; tears glossed over your eyes all the same.

Every time he hurt you, his kisses always eased the pain. They made you feel alive even when they were the very thing sucking the life out of you.

Whenever he didn’t answer your calls, or talked to another woman, and even ignored you for days on end, all it took was that damn knock that you looked forward to every week. You were addicted to him. You craved his attention, his affection, his lips. But your addiction was just that— an addiction and nothing more.

But despite all of his wrongdoings, he was just as addicted to you.

So when he pulled away, looked you in the eyes, and finished his sentence.

‘I can't give you everything…but I can give you this.’ He looked at your lips and knew exactly what he was about to do. ‘I hope this is enough.’ With his fingers under your chin, Mason leaned in and gently placed his lips on yours, knowing the damage was already done.

What could you say to that?

Yes, I want you to give yourself to me completely.

We can make this work

What if I don’t deserve to be loved?

He was right, and you knew it. There’s nothing you could say that could make this hurt any less, so you kissed him back, anyway. Even when a tear rolled down your cheek and the pain in your chest pressed against your lungs, you kissed him back. The saltiness on your lips, the same flavor as the bitterness in your heart.

You could both taste it.

Mason didn’t say anything. He just moved his hands down your thighs until he reached your knees, scooting you closer to him. And you let him. You let him move you into whatever position he wanted you in because you no longer had the energy to object.

You didn’t care to notice when he pulled down slacks and his boxers after that. You didn’t care to take in the sight of his pre-cum-leaking length, bobbing up and down and more than ready to split you in two because you didn’t have to. You’d seen it a hundred times before.

The only difference was this was the last time.

Your disheartened state wasn’t invisible to Mason. It pained him more than he expected when you didn’t even glance at him while he stripped like you did before. You didn’t squeeze your legs together or bite your lip, you just sat there, frozen.

‘If you want me to stop, just tell me,’ If only you could’ve seen the way his face fell as he kneeled in front of you to wipe away the tear he caused, only to be met by you flinching and turning your cheek before he could reach.

The message couldn’t be any clearer.

Is this how the night is going to end? He thought. Granted, he didn’t want it to come to this in the first place, but now that it had, this is how it ends? Mason wondered if this pain in his chest was how you felt every Friday; the agonizing feeling of rejection that churned in the pit of his stomach. The two of you were face to face, but you couldn’t be any further apart and he hated it but deserved it.

He doesn’t even know if he can bring it upon himself to say sorry to you again. It won’t change anything—and it certainly wouldn’t make either of you feel any less shitty—but most importantly, it just lengthened the list of the ways he failed you. So he didn’t apologize. He gave you one last sorrowful look before standing up and reaching for his clothes on the floor.

Your lips didn’t tell him you wanted to stop, but everything else did; your tears, body language, lack of eye contact, and closed-off demeanor were louder than the words you didn’t speak. Internally, you thanked him for not saying sorry— you don’t know how many more of his apologies you could take—but you panicked a little when he backed away.

You wanted him to feel your pain, but you didn’t want him to leave.

Before you even realized what you were doing, your hand caught his arm to stop his movements. You cursed yourself for not being stronger, for not cutting him off after the first he hurt you like you usually would with anyone else, but you refused to let this be your last memory of him—of both of you. And now that you had his attention, you had to speak. ‘Just go slow,’ you cleared your throat.

You didn’t even look him in the eyes as you spoke; he doesn’t deserve that.

Mason’s eyes went to his arm and the way you desperately held on to him while hiding your embarrassment; it triggered something in him. You sucked in a shaky breath when he nodded and dropped his clothes back onto the floor.

Without saying a word, he moved you back into the position he had you in before; your head resting against the back of the chair with your hanging ass off the edge, and your legs open on either side of him. Mason rested himself between your thighs, towering over you, taking in the sight of your naked body ready to be used by him .

For two people just looking for some relief, this was strangely…intimate. Other than the kissing sounds, the room was dead silent. His lips gently sucked on your neck, then your collarbone, and your breasts, before moving back up. He kissed you like he had all the time in the world and it was painstakingly sensual. You squirmed under his touch, already worked up and exhaling soft moans while he held your hips in place.

He had complete access to you.

Your cunt clenched every time he spoke in your ear, and you didn’t mean to moan when Mason moved his hand between your bodies and slid his middle and ring finger up and down your glistening slit. ‘You’re drenched,’ he sucked in a deep breath, his cock twitching, feeling your arousal coat his fingers. ‘I’m going to put it in. Is that alright?’ He adjusted himself, lining his hips up with yours.

‘Do whatever you want.’ It was clear how this was going to go. You wanted this more than you let on—you yearned for this—but deep down, you told yourself this was all out of sympathy.

In bold letters, your mind told you that Mason pitied you and he was only going to fuck you because you practically begged for it. So, you didn’t tell him to do whatever he wants in a sexy, ‘I’m giving you all control’ kind of way, you said it in a nonchalant, ‘I don’t care. Just get it over with’ kind of way. And deep down, it hurt both him and you.

Mason sighed and took himself in his hand. His forehead leaned against yours as you both watched him give his cock a few relaxed tugs. It was that feeling—that addicting feeling of his thick shaft sliding between your folds to coat himself in your slick, before pushing his tip inside of you that made you both forget everything except how badly you both needed this.

‘Shit’

You both moaned almost too loudly once he got past the head. He was big, bigger than anyone you had been with before. The first stroke was always the most painful, but you were used to him, and you were wet enough to not need any prep. He knew this.

He knew all of your sexual needs, what you could take and what you couldn’t. He knew what drove you crazy and what was too much.

Little by little, he stretched you out and you ate it up. You felt the familiar pressure radiate in your abdomen; clearly, you were out of practice and already full but you never told him to stop or wait. Mason watched your head tilt back and your jaw slack with pleasure, and used that opportunity to kiss any skin he could put his lips on.

The sight of you taking him always made his chest swell.

Mason pushed in another inch, and your hands immediately pressed against his stomach. ‘I know, baby, let me in,’ he cooed, moving your hands from his stomach and bringing them up to his mouth as he kissed the palms of your hands. His soft tone relaxed you, and without warning, he pushed in another inch.

You swear you felt his dick jump.

‘Shit —That’s it…That’s my girl.’

At some point, Mason gave you a chance to settle around him. He paused to stroke your hair or occasionally let his thumb glide over your clit to counteract the pressure before starting up again.

It was disgusting the way he controlled your emotions. He had all the knowledge of your likes and dislikes, and even now, he played into them; whispering sweet nothings in your ear as he filled you up, praising you for every inch you took, and cursing once it was finally all in.

You both sighed in relief like it was routine. Without trying, he pressed against your cervix and there was nothing you could do about it but moan and bury your face in his chest—it was music to his ears. You wanted to stay quiet, to take him and not give him the satisfaction of letting him know how good he was making you feel, but each grind against your hips made your toes curl and your grip on him tighter.

He fucked you at a slow, torturous pace, not because it felt good, but because he needed this to last. He needed to savor every tight ring of muscle he pushed through and every sound he drew from your full lips.

As much as he wanted to deny it, he couldn’t lie; he’d been thinking about this for weeks. Every time he was inconvenienced at work, or stressed, or had to stay at work longer than he needed to, he thought about burying himself between your thighs while you clawed at his back and begged him not to stop. He thought about releasing his stress inside of you and watching you drink it from him after he fucked your absolute brains out.

And that was just on a Tuesday.

It was like an addict’s first fix after going through withdrawals; he doesn’t remember how or why he went so long without you. The way your walls molded to his size and length, squeezing him in all the right places, and— god— don’t even get him started on your warmth. He didn’t say it, but he could feel your heartbeat between your legs before he even put it fully in.

Up until this moment, it was like you two were back in your bed. His mouth hovered over yours while your hands rested on his thighs with his cock deep in your stomach.

He wanted to taste your lips again, but you didn’t grant him that privilege. This time, boundaries were set.

Fuck buddies don’t kiss, right?

He made it abundantly clear that’s all you were, so this is all he would get. Fuck buddies don’t need to look into each other’s eyes during every stroke, and they don’t need to kiss each other on the mouth—that’s reserved for lovers, right?

So, you shut your eyes and turned your cheek when he leaned in. You could tell he didn’t expect that when his hips stuttered for a moment. Mason’s brows furrowed as he turned your chin with his index finger, but you resisted.

“Don’t be like that…kiss me.” There was hurt in his voice. Your coldness stung more than it should have. Never has Mason ever been refused, especially romantically. He called your name lovingly, still trying to turn your face towards him.

He wanted your attention and your refusing to give it to him felt like a punch in the gut.

Out of frustration, he thought about gripping your jaw and forcing himself onto your lips, simply because he could, but he knew better. Instead, he opted to comfort himself in the crook of your neck. You couldn’t stop him from nibbling on your ear or licking down the side of your neck even if you tried.

Your stifled whimpers turned into moans as Mason picked up the pace of his thrust. He wanted to get a rise out of you. You were distant, in your own little world, while Mason pumped himself in and out of you. The physical pleasure was there, but you showed him emotion.

He wondered how he could be inside of someone and still feel worlds apart.

You used you to beg him to keep going. Every chance you got, your mouth was on his, telling him every thought that came to your mind while he fucked your insides. Mason loved that you were vocal, not just because of your moans, but because he knew you’d always tell him how you felt. He looked forward to hearing what you wanted and how you wanted it, and hearing your eager fucked-out responses even when you didn’t hear what he said because you were too overwhelmed and too focused on your approaching peak.

But now, you didn’t give him any of that. You just laid there with your hands on his stomach, barely letting his chest touch yours, and barely letting yourself moan. Despite how good it felt.

‘C’mon baby, talk to me. You know I hate it when you get quiet,’ he cooed in your ear, grabbing your wrist and pushing himself further against you. ‘Tell me how good it feels…tell me you love it.’

You gasped in time with his thrusts at the extra pressure of him burrowing his dick deeper into you. Mason grunted, waiting for you to respond without stopping. ‘Fuck—Say my name, love.’ It took all your energy to keep quiet. You didn’t answer him and you still didn’t look him in the eyes.

Mason was getting desperate. Sweat dripped down his forehead at the way you were tightening around him. He didn’t know how much longer he could last. He tried so hard to get you to at least look at him—to spare him a quick glance before his inevitable release, but you’d rather focus on the walls behind him than give in to him again.

‘Damn it,’ he grunted. In one last-ditch effort to save the memory of what the two of you once were, Mason grabbed your ass and squeezed it tight, repositioning you on the chair so he could bottom out into you fully.

It wasn’t until his hands cupped the back of your knees and pushed them into your chest, did you finally look at him with wide eyes. His pelvis was now completely flush against your own, and you took it all.

‘Mason wait,’

You swear you heard him thank god when his eyes locked with yours. Your hands shot up to grab his arms and your mouth hung open against his lips as he rested his forehead on yours. ‘There you are,’ he whispered in a low voice. As much as he wanted to, he didn’t kiss you. He understood that wasn’t what you wanted anymore, but he let it be known that he still could, whether you want it or not.

It was his silent dominance that turned you on so, so much. You tried to look away again; no, you needed to look away otherwise, you’d fall back into his painful grasp. But your efforts were useless when he held you by the back of your hair to keep your head facing him. ‘Nuh-uh. Don’t shut down on me, I’m still here…I’m right here,’

He didn’t stop. The sound of skin slapping echoed throughout the building and you hated how much it turned you on. Your hands did nothing to stop his relentless pounding on your cunt; he was now in the perfect position to hit that one spot that led you to your undoing every time, and you could hardly breathe. Mason hissed when you dug your manicured nails into his biceps as he pinned you down. He felt so good it was painful.

Your hands came down in front of you to push him again and minimize the impact of his thrusts, but he held your forearms at your sides before you could protest. The sound of your sobs, along with your beautiful face contorting into one of pleasure, was enough to have him question everything he said earlier. He was so close, so close . ‘Talk to me, love,’ he grunted. ‘Tell me you don’t want me to go.’

How funny.

It was like the roles had reversed. Call it pettiness or bitterness, but you wanted him to hurt; You wanted to make him regret not choosing you because, in reality, you loved him. You wanted more—you needed more than one day out of the week. Hell, you craved him every day… but telling him that wouldn’t make a difference. Mason’s mind was made, and part of you resents him for it.

‘Please, baby…’ he stilled inside of you once both your silence and his pleasure were too much to bear, panting against your neck. His voice sounded like it was on the verge of defeat and he wondered if he had finally lost you. The heat of his breath on your skin made you shiver as your chest heaved up and down.

‘You’re a coward,’ you finally spoke.

Hearing your voice, Mason shot up from the crook of your neck to look at you. You cursed at your heartstrings when you watched his eyes light up.

‘Yes, I’m a coward.’ His hands immediately went to cup your face as if he didn’t register what you said. ‘I don’t deserve you.’ He said it so enthusiastically, placing soft, sporadic kisses all over your face; it was almost pathetic. How could you hate him when he was so happy just to hear you finally speak to him again?

‘I’m so sorry’

There’s that damn apology

For all you know, that was your breaking point. Tears welled in your eyes. ‘I should've never come here, you are an idiot Mason,’ your voice cracked. The light in Mason’s eyes didn’t fade, even as you cursed and called him out his name, hitting and scratching him, he still kissed your skin just as gently as he had before.

You choked out a shaky exhale when he went back to rolling his hips, brushing against your already bruised G-spot. You felt him grow impossibly harder inside of you.

‘Yes,’ he hissed. ‘Keep talking.’

Your eyes widened when he picked you up by your waist and held you on his pelvis. ‘No! Stop! Put me down!’ You thrashed and pushed him, but it was no use. He was already walking away from the chair and pushing you against the wall.

You went for his face, his neck, his chest, anything you could put your claws on, and Mason took the pain as he took hold of your wrists. ‘I don’t want this,’ You lied.

Mason knew it was a lie because your voice was softer as you said it, shakier, like it hurt you to say it aloud, and hurt him that you felt like you had to say it. Although he didn’t blame you. He didn’t blame you for any of this. How could he?

He watched the tears slip from the corners of your beautiful, sad eyes. ‘I hate you,’ you choked out. Your breaking voice was barely above a whisper and Mason felt his heart split in two. He always did love to hear what you had to say, even when it was painful to hear. You didn’t mean it even though it felt like you did.

You hated his unwillingness to put his fears or pride aside so you could love each other fully. You hated the hold he had on your heart, your mind, your body. You hated how good the sex was and you hated that he wouldn’t give you more than that. Most of all, you hated that this was how it would end…but you didn’t hate him.

He took your wrists that were in his hands and brought them to his lips. He did his best to comfort you and wipe your tears.

‘I know, baby,’ he cooed, stroking the hairs that stuck to your face as he kissed your tears.

He placed you on the washing machine again as it creaked as he started to move again. You were like putty in his hands, so malleable, so vulnerable. Out of all the men you’ve ever been with, Mason was the only one who had this kind of effect on you. It was unhealthy the way he made you question everything about yourself; your emotions, your sex appeal, you wanted to look good for him.

You wanted to be his

‘Don’t leave me,’ your words came out as a quiet sob and Mason could feel the lump in his throat start to form. He knew that if he spoke, all of his emotions would pour out at once, so he let your shaky hands pull him in. He let your lips graze his and your noses dance around each other.

Testing the waters, his tongue ghosted over your bottom lip as if he were asking for permission and Mason took the faint noise you made in response as an invitation. He tilted his head to his right, before closing his eyes, and finally kissing you once more. This time you didn’t turn away, and you didn’t shut him out.

The kiss was slow and tasteful, just like his strokes. Every groan he let out, every lick and nip at your bottom lip was deliberate. The deep vibrations he moaned into your mouth rang like a love letter to you; it was intimate.

You could feel the butterflies in your stomach start up again like a schoolgirl kissing her crush for the first time. Your fingers laced in his hair, tugging it just hard enough to earn a growl and a calculated press against your stomach as he angled his hips upwards; a move that had both of you on the edge.

The irony of him fucking you at this tender, love-making pace when he promised that was something he couldn’t give you. ‘I'm not capable of love,’ he said . ‘You deserve someone that could give you the love you deserve,’ he said.

Was this not it?

Was this not him finally being honest with himself and realizing that maybe something official wouldn’t be so bad?

Neither of you kept track of the time, but you stayed like that for a while, moaning and grinding until your lips were swollen.

Thoughts started forming in your head. Childish daydreams of you and him eating out and going on walks, Late-night phone calls eventually turning into late conversations when you two finally moved in together, and thoughts of sleeping beside him and waking up to find him still there with the morning sun on Saturday.

You should’ve known better.

You whimpered when you felt him pull away from your lips, but the loss in contact was instantly replaced when rested his forehead against yours again, and his heavy breathing mixed with your own. You loved when he did that, the intimacy of it always made you weak.

Something in you told you he was about to speak, you anticipated it.

His voice rang in your head.

I was wrong

Come home with me

I’ll stay

but instead, you were met with a low, raspy, ‘Tell me this is enough.’

Words cannot describe how quickly your eyes snapped open and your smile fell. ‘What?’

Mason’s jaw clenched as he worked up the courage to repeat himself. ��This…is all I can give you. I need to hear you say it…for both of our sakes.’

He’s reaching his limit.

His head was still casually, resting on yours like he didn’t just completely undermine the best minutes of your life with five words. ‘You can’t be serious,’ you give an awkward chuckle before realizing he was dead serious.

‘No!’ you spit. You shoved him back, the butterflies in your stomach quickly turned into disgust, and you were back to thrashing around under him. ‘Was that not enjoyable for you? Did I make a mistake?’

Mason shook his head as if you were inconveniencing him. ‘it’s not like that. You know it isn’t.’

‘Then what is it?!’ you yelled. ‘Mase-‘

‘Tell me this is enough…and you will be happy with this. I need you to be happy with this.’

‘I’m not!’

You tried everything. You tried kissing him again, grinding, moaning, touching, anything to reignite the flame that engulfed you mere seconds ago, but he didn’t give in. Mason practically flinched when you brought your hands up to his face again.

‘We don’t have to be together!’ you said, frantically caressing him. ‘We can stay like this. You don’t need to be mine. Just let me be yours.’ You begged him.

‘Please, don’t make this harder than it has to be,’ he pleaded.

‘How could you say that?’ Your glossy eyes scanned his face for any signs of hesitation or emotion. You looked for the light that shined in his irises whenever you spoke. It was gone, dimmed, and dull on his expressionless face.

Was he always so cold?

‘Please don’t make me say it.’ At this point, there was no use in stopping the tears from falling.

With all his might, he wanted to say it. It crawled its way from his heart to the tip of his tongue as he watched you break down because of his selfishness—his cowardice.

He wanted to tell you how much sleep he lost in the weeks he didn’t speak to you. He wanted to tell you how long he debated pressing the dial button last night because he missed the sound of your voice. He wanted to tell you he looked forward to hearing your door unlock whenever he knocked every week.

He wanted to tell you it was never about the sex.

It was the moments like the minutes after when you both laid together and talked about your week. It was the warmth of your skin as you cuddled up next to him under the sheets, and the way you pretended to stay awake and listen to him speak even though you could hardly keep your eyes open. It was when he noticed your soft breathing that indicated that you had finally fallen asleep. And every time, he would stay awake a little longer just to hold you and whisper the things he could never say out loud.

You took one long look at his face and realized this was a battle you could never win. He made up his mind and wasn’t giving you another choice.

This was truly your last moment together.

Mason laced his fingers with yours as he rocked you against the washing machine and you moaned for him, louder than you ever had before, because you wanted your voice to be etched into his mind. You licked your way into each other's mouths, memorizing the taste, and no one said anything about the tears.

You didn’t bring up the salty droplets that dripped onto your face as he kissed you—there was no need. Instead, you brushed your thumb along his cheek and wiped the wetness away, just as he did to you.

Mason’s pace quickened when you announced that you were about to come and— god— did it feel good. Without stopping, he talked you through your orgasm; telling you how pretty you looked coming on him, grunting out how you’re the best he’s ever had, and asking you if it felt good when he fucked you harder.

And you gave him those fucked out responses he loved so much. Your eyelids were low and heavy as you nodded your head numbly, letting out a series of ‘Oh god’s,’ ‘Don’t stop’s,’ and ‘Fuck, Mase. Right there.’ He was going insane.

You clenched around him as you came undone. Your legs caged him in and he thrusted into you like his life depended on it. For the last time, Mason called out your name and dug his nails into your waist, sputtering above you as you milked him from the inside.

He gave you everything he had, and you did the same.

You gave in.

This was enough

if he told you to do anything, you would’ve done it. But now, all you could do was reminisce and imagine a future where Mason wanted to be your boyfriend: a future where he asked you to stay.

[tomsparkyr]

Kiss Cam - MM7

Mason wants his girlfriend to meet his parents. But little does she know, more than just his parents will be meeting her.

Waking up, the sunlight gently shining into your room. Your brain replayed the last few scenes of your dream, something about a walking tree, before they were loose forever. Stretching, you noticed the lump in the bed was still there. The lump being none other than your boyfriend.

His back turned away from you, you delicately wrapped your arms around his shoulders, as he hummed with the contact of your cool hands on his warm back. You gently kissed the two freckles just below his neck, as he turned around to face you.

Mason’s brown eyes, like a burning hearth on a cold day looked into yours, as he mouthed “Good morning.” to you, before you too mouthed “good morning.” back.

He pulled you closer into him, and your head rested against his beating heart. A heart that beat for you.

“Did you sleep okay m’love.” Mason mumbled, his cheek buried into your hair, as he placed a soft kiss on it.

“There was someone annoying me all night.” You mumbled against his chest, feeling his laugh before you heard it.

“Fine then. If that’s how it is.” Mason giggled before pretending to push you off of the bed, before he quickly pulled you back into his chest safely.

“Mason!” You squealed, as you felt your leg go over the edge.

“If it’s not the consequence of my own actions.” He laughed, his hand rubbing up and down your back.

You two sat in a comfortable silence.

“I slept just flawlessly.” You said to him, answering his question.

“Yeah? I slept just exquisitely.” Mason said back to you, wiggling his eyebrows.

Your relationship was fairly new, the pair of you dating for half a year. Yet at the same time, your relationship was definitely not new. Mason and you had met at school, when you got paired together during food tech and had to make apple crumble together. After a visit to your head of year and a ban on any further participation, it was safe to say, you’d found a new friend. Eventually that friendship turned into a crush, and 4 years later, a relationship.

“I need to shower. But it’s so lonely.” Mason said, poking your back lightly. “So so so lonely.” He finished, kissing your cheek with every ‘so’ he said.

“Is that your way of asking me to shower with you? Very smooth Masey.” You giggled into his chest as he pulled you impossibly closer.

“Is that you saying yes?” He said, significantly quieter than before.

“Yes.” You nodded again this chest.

Mason rolled on top of you, so that you were underneath him, his hands on your hips. Before they snaked up your body as he began to tickle you.

“Mason stop!” You said, your whole body squirming underneath him. Before long, you were both breathless with giggles as he stared down at you, before dramatically lifting his wrist to check his none existent clock.

“Oh look it’s time to shower!” Mason said, before he got out of bed, and tugged you down by your feet, before you wrapped your legs around his waist as he kicked the door open with his foot.

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

Stepping out of the bathroom, making sure not to slip on any water, Mason quickly followed behind with a towel around his waist.

“You should come to the match today.” He said, as he pulled on a pair of boxers.

“Mase you know I’d love too but-” You stopped, unsure of what really was holding you back from going.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to. I wouldn’t pressure you or anything.” He said, coming over to you and wrapping his arms around your waist. You snuggled into his chest, as he brought his arm to your head.

“Baby please, i’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I just thought it would be a good time for you to meet everyone.” He confessed.

Meet everyone? What did he mean by that?

“Meet everyone?” You said, peering up at him.

“Yeah everyone like mum, dad, Lewis and whatever. Mums been doing my bloody head in, ‘Mase you can’t keep talking about her and not expect me to by dying to meet her!’” Mason said, imitating his mum, which made you laugh.

“Yeah. I’d love to. I need something to wear though, I was planning on staying in my pajamas the whole day. Wait. What if they don’t like me? What if they ask me football questions and I don’t know them? I still don’t get the offside rule. Or omg, what if they think i’m with you because of money-”

With every word that left your lips, Mason’s eyebrows moved either up his face before he eventually cut you off with a kiss. Grabbing our thigh lightly, he directed you to the bathroom counter, which he placed you on, before slotting himself between your knees. His hands rubbed your thighs lovingly, as he just stared at you, making you blush.

“They. Are. Going. To. Fucking. Love. You.” Mason said, lightly placing a kiss on your lips for every word he said.

“I’m finally doing it. I’m meeting the parents.” You giggled, scratching his hair slightly.

“I love you.” He said.

“I love you too.”

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

Mason gave you one last goodbye kiss before he made his way to the stadium. It was the last match of the season, so there would be a few surprises. Chelsea posting a teasing video on their instagram of a camera quickly moving around before stopping at two people. You and Mason had debated over what it could be, both having no real answer.

“My favourite part of the game will be getting my well done kiss when we win.” Mason said cheekily before he left. You lightly slapped his butt before he left, blowing you one last kiss.

Pulling a Mount jersey on, you were ready to go.

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

Sitting in Mason’s box, you tapped your foot anxiously waiting for his family to arrive. When the door suddenly opened, you got up and turned around to see his mum and dad standing there. His mum immediately seeing you, and pulling you into a hug.

“Oh I’ve heard so much about you Y/N! You’re even more beautiful in person than what Mason described!” She gushed, as you felt yourself blush.

“Where are my manners? I’m Y/N. It’s so lovely to meet you, I’ve heard a lot about you too. Was warned about this one especially.” You joked, nodding your head towards his brother Lewis who gave you a hug.

“You’ll come to learn i’m the better Mount in this family.” He joked.

“I think you’ll find that, that is myself.” His dad joked, pulling you into a hug too.

You settled into a pleasant conversation, automatically feeling at home. You sighed in content as out came the players, and out come your boy.

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

Football Mase was completely different than the Mason at home. Cheeks burning red, and a short temper, you watched him argue with the referee, his hands telling the story colourfully. His usual calm, kind eyes were a fiery hot, and you would be lying if you said you didn’t like it.

As the full time whistle blew, and Mason proving his statement earlier on correct, they did win. And during his lap of applause, a voice boomed out of the speakers.

“Ladies and gentleman, we would appreciate if you could take your seats as quickly as possible.”

Unsure of what that meant, you settled back into your seat, making eye contact with Mason as he too shrugged his shoulders, not knowing what was happening.

The stadium went dark as the crowd oohhed and what was happening. Green, blue, purples lights danced around the stadium before the words “Building Bridges at the Bridge.” appeared on the screen, as the crowd cheered, unaware of what that meant. The stadium went dark again, before ‘Kiss Cam’ appeared on the screen, with pictures of both Mason and Kai with pouty faces moved on the screen as well. You laughed, as the camera whizzed around, stopping on Ben and Reece who stood unaware on the pitch.

Reece, who pulled a face when the crowd laughed soon realised what was happening as he pointed at the screen. Ben laughed too, before Ben kissed Reece’s cheek, making the whole stadium laugh.

The game went on, and the ooh’s of the stadium increased when couples were chose. You too laughed along with Debbie, until your laugh was stole from you when you seen yourself appear on the screen, along with a random man sat beside you. He gave you a sheepish look, one that you returned back.

You seen Mason bite his lip, before he said something and began to climb the barrier, as he began to run up the steps to his box.

As he got into the box, he quickly span you around and dipped you into a kiss, as you felt the whole stadium erupt in cheers. As you smiled into the kiss, he helped you back up.

“Guess we’re not so secret anymore.” He winked.

Don’t know how I feel about this … but I hope you guys like it!!! Thanks for all the love Xx🥹🥹🥹

[tomsparkyr]

Hey can you write one where the reader has a crush on Mason, but he says he only sees her as a friend, and that he has a crush on the reader's friend. But after y/n moves away from him, he realizes that he was always in love with her too. Please, with a happy ending!!!!

confessing love | mason mount

warnings: fluff, a bit of angst maybe? word count: 3767 notes: I LOVED THIS ONE!! remembering that english is not my first language, this has not been revised!!! i hope you like it :) masterlist | requests are open!

Y/N's camera lens traveled around the pitch during Manchester United's training sessions. And she loved her work as a visual media creator for the club's social networks. Combining her passion for football with her passion for photography was perfect. She was living a long-planned dream. Y/N was trying to get the best angles of the training session led by coach Ten Hag. She laughed a little when she saw Rashford and Casemiro play with the ball through the camera lens. He captured good moments of the two of them until she looked for her next target. That's when her lens passed Mason Mount. Y/N always liked to take pictures of Mason last because when her camera found him, it was hard to take the focus off him. She followed him all over the pitch, looking at him through her hyperfocus lens and taking more photos of him than of any other player. Of course, she knew it was a bit unprofessional, but no one needed to know, since she was the only one operating that camera and on the website and social media, all the players received the same publicity. The ones that remained, she kept in her personal collection.

Mason was running around the pitch, until he received a ball from Shaw, which he took on his chest and sent into the back of the net. Y/N made a point of capturing every moment as he celebrated by smiling, messing with his hair in a cute way and every bit of how his body reacted and the expressions on his face. Until he looked directly at her and realized that the camera was pointing at him. Mason began to make faces that made Y/N laugh as she recorded everything, without missing a beat. The truth was that Y/N was very friendly with all the players, they were nice and good company for going out and doing something fun, and nothing was more than friendship, but she had to admit that she had developed a special bond with Mason. She knew that with him, she didn't just want friendship, it was much more than that. But she felt too cowardly to admit it to him. He came running towards her, and she lowered the camera, finally taking the focus off him. She didn't need a camera to observe Mason Mount when she had him so close. "Too much work today, Y/N?"

"I'm always very busy, Mase." Y/N wiping the camera lens. Ever since she'd discovered her crush on Mason, she'd been a bit awkward around him because she found it hard to look at him and talk to him without looking like a lovesick idiot. A shiver ran through her body when he wrapped his arms around her shoulders and squeezed with his other hand. "You need a break to relax, you work too much." Y/N was going to ask him what his ideas were for her to relax, but she wasn't so bold. "Today is Maya's birthday." Maya worked in PR at United and was one of her best friends at the club. Working with her was amazing. They always went out together whenever they could. "Oh, I know, she invited me." Mason smiled in a different way, which made a thousand butterflies fly around in Y/N's stomach. "So, I'll see you tonight, right?" She hugged the camera, too nervous to answer and stuttering Y/N just shook her head up and down. Mason left a kiss on her cheek and pulled away when Ten Hag called out to him. Y/N stood there watching Mason walk away for God knows how long, that kiss on the cheek was capable of melting her entire system. She was so caught up that she didn't even notice when Marcus approached.

She could say that Marcus was one of her best friends. He was the first person she had been close to since she started working at the club. She felt she could count on him for anything. "When are you going to tell him?" "What a fright, Rash!" She looked at him unconcerned. "You need to stop this!" "And you need to stop running away from my questions, Y/N." "I don't know what you're talking about…" "Come on, you don't lie to me. You've got a thing for Mase." They both watched Mason from afar. She looked at her friend and rolled her eyes. "How do you know that?" "I know you, honey." He laughed, pinching her nose. "Do you think I don't notice how you spend hours and hours stalking him with that camera?" "Yeah, I have a crush on him, so what?" "So you're really going to leave without exposing your feelings?" Marcus raised an eyebrow and Y/N bit her lip. A few weeks ago, she had received an offer to become a Real Madrid staffer. Moving to Spain wasn't in her plans, but the offer was too good to turn down. Her photos had been successful, and she was getting recognized for her talent, but she still didn't know if she would actually accept. She loved Manchester, she loved United, and she loved the players with whom she was already familiar. To change would be to leave that behind. Leaving Mason behind.

"I haven't decided yet. It's a good opportunity, of course, but…" "I bet having Mason would make you say no to the proposal." "Rash, you don't know what you're talking about." "I'm just suggesting it. I'm going to miss you, and I'd rather you didn't go, but I understand, and I'm advising you, if you go, go without this weight on your back." Rashford winked at her and turned back to the pitch. Y/N took one last look at the two of them before heading to the administration building, she needed to edit those photos and publish them. She knew she had a big decision to make, wondering if her friend Marcus was right. Would Mason be a good reason to make her stay in England?

Later, Y/N was at home getting ready for Maya's party when she received a message from Mason:

mase: do u want me to come and pick u up?

The truth was that Y/N didn't need a ride, but Mason's invitation was impossible to refuse. The minutes she spent in his car in the passenger seat, watching his profile drive through the streets of Manchester, were almost magical. So she quickly replied that yes, she wanted his ride. What she really meant was that she wanted his company at every moment of her life. She finished getting ready in an hour, which was about the time Mason pulled up in front of her house. In the car he seemed very excited about Maya's birthday party and for some reason that was giving Y/N confidence. Maybe Marcus was right, and she should get those feelings out soon before they suffocated her. Maya's birthday was taking place in a fancy hotel and Y/N was enjoying it with her friends, her Manchester United friends and, of course, Mason. He was great company at parties, always daring her to knock back shots of booze or asking her to dance. On the one hand, Y/N loved him, but on the other she felt sad. Every touch he made on her waist or anywhere on her body sent shivers down her spine, and when he looked at her smiling and fiddled with her hair without taking his eyes off her?

She couldn't resist. But the worst part was seeing other girls flirting with Mason when he was with her, and not being able to do anything about it, since Mase wasn't someone she could call her own. So she decided to hide in the bathroom for a while. What was supposed to be five minutes turned into almost thirty, and she decided to go out and look for Marcus. She needed her friend more than anything at that moment, but instead of finding him, she bumped into Mason, who looked five times more altered than the last time she'd seen him. "Mase?" "Y/N! You're gooone!" He said in that slurred, shuffling voice. "What happened to you, Mase? I leave you for a few minutes, and you decide to drink the whole bar?" He moved his mouth laughingly, and she supported him with her shoulders, helping him to walk. Mason in that state meant it was time to go home. She knew the friend she had. "Where are you taking me?"

"To your house." "I'm usually the one who takes the girls there." "Funny." She laughed and pulled him away. They arrived in the parking lot and Y/N guided Mason to where he had parked his thousand-euro car. "The key." She held out her hand, and Mason slipped his hand into the front pocket of his pants without complaint and handed it to her. He wouldn't let just anyone drive his car, but in that state he either obeyed Y/N or he obeyed Y/N. "There. Here we are. You can get to your room on your own, can't you?" she said from outside, in front of Mason's door, who didn't look very well, but well enough to get into his own house. He looked at her worriedly. "How are you going home?" "I'll manage, Mase. I can order an Uber." She shrugged, wanting to get out of there. "Not at all. You can sleep here. I'll drop you home in the morning." He suggested, taking her by the hand and leading her into his house, but Y/N didn't move, letting go of her hand. Mason seemed somewhat loving, but she needed to remind herself that whatever he was doing at that moment, he wasn't in his most sober state. Alcohol could easily manipulate his actions, and she didn't know what was real. "I'm not sleeping at your place."

"Why not?" He frowned at the refusal. Normally, Y/N never said no to him. "You've slept here before." "There were other people along." She said quietly. It was those parties that got a bit out of hand and went on until late, and everyone thought it was safer to spend the night than to drive drunk. "And what's wrong with not having other people?" He asked, moving closer. So close that Y/N could have sworn she felt something in her body fail. It could have been her heartbeat or her breathing. She gave a half-smile, refusing to answer that question. There were all the problems in the world spending the night with a guy she couldn't call her own. It was too much of a disservice to her poor heart. "You look strange." He pointed out, looking right into her eyes. "You were weird the whole party." "I wasn't."

"I know you, Y/N. Yes, you were." Mason took another step forward, holding one of her shoulders. "You don't want to tell me why?" Y/N analyzed for a few seconds, hating that moment. She knew Mason wouldn't stop until he got an answer out of her and that's when she thought of the response she'd gotten from Rashford that morning. So she took a deep breath, making one of the two decisions she needed to make at that point in her life. "This is going to sound really stupid…" "You can tell me anything." "Look…" She looked away, but Mason held her face and his touch felt so good, it brought the best feeling in the world to her heart. "I'll say it straight away, okay?" He warned and Mason nodded, interested. Y/N took one last breath and quickly poured the words over him. "I like you, that's all. I know we're friends and that I shouldn't like you, but I do and I couldn't keep it to myself any longer. I like you. Holy shit! I didn't want to like you, but I do, so what am I going to do? Hell! It's not my fault, I'm not in charge of my heart. Mase, I can't be around you without my heart leaping three hundred times and I need to know what you're thinking right now!"

Mason blinked, a little stunned by the revelation, and felt something bad inside him. The alcohol in his brain wasn't letting him think straight. "Shit…" He muttered softly, letting go of her shoulder. "Y/N…" "What?" she asked, bracing herself for what was perhaps the worst thing she could hear.

"You know I think you're amazing, right? I like you a lot Y/N you, but not like that…" He concluded and the sentence almost made Y/N's world come crashing down. That was definitely not happening. She felt pathetic. "I was actually interested in Maya…" Mason swallowed before saying it and that was the end of the world for Y/N. She could deal with unrequited love, but a relationship between Mason and her best friend? It was too much for her. "Oh my God…" She took a step back, wanting to get out of there and holding back any tears that might fall. "Mason." She whispered and he continued talking as if that wasn't the worst thing he was doing. "I'm really sorry." Y/N couldn't look them in the eye, the street seemed less painful. "We can still be friends after that, right? Nothing have to change…"

She suddenly looked at him, hurt. How could he ask her that after saying he liked her best friend? "I-I…" She stammered. "I don't know if I can go through with this until I'm sure I've gotten rid of all my feelings for you. Bye, Mason." Y/N turned her back on him and walked away as fast as she could. She couldn't do that. Walking away was the best option, until she no longer felt anything, until she saw Mason Mount as just a friend. The problem was that for Y/N it could last a lifetime.

A few days later…

Mason felt strange, he could even say a little unhappy. An unbearable emptiness. Ever since Y/N had left him, he hadn't seen her for a few days. What was that withdrawal? He couldn't even say. He even thought about asking Maya, but he felt like such an idiot after that conversation. He really had an interest in the girl, but after what had happened with Y/N, Mason didn't care, he just wanted to get that feeling out of him. Because his current condition was: he missed a girl with whom he was hopelessly in love. Like almost all of his clubmates, he was always asked what was going on between him and Y/N. Mason always denied any love interest. But it wasn't possible! Could it be that only they didn't see what everyone else saw? Or at least, only he didn't see? Maybe what he felt for Maya was just physical attraction and the person he really liked was Y/N. It had been so long since he had liked anyone and when this person appeared, Mason was terrified.

She was the one who greeted him at the CT with a smile every day and made him laugh with the photos she took of him while he was distracted. It was fun how she would blackmail him with those photos to ask for favors like buying her a milk shake or autographing his shirts. Even though Mason never said no to her, he loved their dynamic. He also liked having her at all his games, cheering him on and giving him a big hug when the game was over. Shit, Mason wanted that back. He wanted Y/N back in his life, he understood her pulling away, but he wasn't going to let it continue.

"Rash, do you know where Y/N is?" He asked Marcus as soon as training was over. "Y/N? She's resigned, Mase." Marcus replied a little sadly, but it had been Y/N's decision and he would respect it. Mason, on the other hand, looked shocked. "What do you mean?" "She received an offer from Real Madrid. Yesterday was her last day. She must be on her way to Madrid…" Marcus looked at his watch on his cell phone. He had managed to say goodbye to Y/N the day before. "Right now." "You can't be serious." "Serious. We've lost the best photographer in the world to a Spanish team." He felt a little guilty. "Do you think…"

"If she went to stay away from you?" Marcus concluded, holding Mason's shoulder. "Don't think too much of yourself, the proposal was very good, but yeah, I think what you said to her may have influenced your final decision." "Damn. I was such an idiot." "Yes, you were." "Do you think I can reverse it?" "If you want to, you can, but please, man, try not to hurt my friend anymore." That hurt, but Mason nodded and understood that it was up to him. Marcus gave him some details, but told him that it might be too late. Y/N was leaving for Madrid at that moment and Mason might have to wait a little longer. Mason found himself defeated for only a few minutes before he realized that if he really wanted her forgiveness, he would have to want it badly and to show it he would have to start right then and there. He left CT like a hurricane in his car and drove as fast as he could to the airport. He wore a hood over his head to avoid being recognized, it would slow him down too much. He looked at the screen and boarding for the next flight to Madrid had already started and Y/N was probably already in the departure lounge. He went to the nearest counter and bought the first ticket he saw. At the counter, while waiting to pay, he thought he was acting out a scene from the clichéd movies Y/N liked, but he couldn't have cared less. Y/N was worth it and if he hadn't been such an idiot, none of this would have been necessary. After passing through the boarding gate, Mason looked as quickly as possible for the flight gate, when he found it he saw the queue forming and Y/N was currently first in line, handing over her documents before getting on the plane.

"Y/N." He shouted so loudly that not only Y/N but most of the people present looked in his direction. She felt someone taking her headphones off and when she looked back she was surprised. "Mason?" The girl went static when she saw him. He came closer and she took the document back and walked over to him. It hurt so much to see him again, but she was curious and a little surprised. "What are you doing here?" "I'm asking you. I can't believe you'd leave without saying goodbye to me." She looked at him a little guiltily. "Besides, you forgot something of yours with me." "What?" "Me." He said quietly, holding her face. At that point, Y/N's brain was going haywire, as if she couldn't imagine that Mason Mount would come to the airport after her to propose. "Answer me this, why did you say that day that you didn't want to like me?" She swallowed. "Why… Because I knew you wouldn't like me back and that would ruin our friendship, like it did." "And how did you know that was true?" Mason arched an eyebrow and Y/N looked around for something to get her out of that situation.

"Well, you told me yourself." "I lied." Mason shrugged his shoulders feeling bad, even worse with the face Y/N was making. "Oh, you lied? Lied that you were interested in my best friend? What did you want with that? To make me feel bad?" Y/N took a deep breath because at that moment she was starting to get angry. "That hurt me so much, you have no idea, and now you come here after me thinking I'm going to be with you whenever you want, Mason?" She finished saying it and took a step back, at which point Mason realized that things were getting very bad for him. He approached her holding her hands, willing to make things right with Y/N. "I'm not proud of it, it's just that I was a bit terrified Y/N. I haven't liked anyone like that for a long time and I loved our friendship, but I didn't even know how much I liked you." He confessed and Y/N had to admit that it shook something inside her. "I found myself smiling for no reason until I realized that I was thinking of you. And that I couldn't waste another day of my life without you. Please give me another chance!" Y/N hesitated. This was difficult because on the one hand she was very hurt, but on the other, the fact that Mason Mount had come up to her in an airport and declared himself like that was all she had ever wanted.

"But what about Maya?" "I have nothing to do with Maya, I never have, and I don't want to. Please understand that." Y/N hesitated for a moment, looking at Mason for sincerity. She sighed, allowing herself to consider the possibility of a second chance. "Mason, it's not easy to forget what happened, but…" She looked into his eyes. "If you've really changed, if you're willing to be honest this time, then maybe we can try again." Mason let out a relieved sigh, his eyes shining with gratitude. "I promise, Y/N, no lies. I want to be more than a friend to you, I want to be someone you can trust." Y/N smiled, giving in to the moment. "All right, Mason. Let's start again, but this time, no secrets. Bring out your true feelings from the start." Mason agreed, determined to make things right. "I'd like that. And I promise I'll make up for any hurt I've caused." The two hugged, deciding to put the past behind them. "So, what's the next step?" Y/N asked, trying to keep things light. Mason smiled. "A date, maybe? Something simple, just to get us started."

Y/N laughed. "That sounds good. But this time, no made-up love triangles, right?" Mason laughed along with her. "Absolutely. Just the two of us, no complications, but…." "What?" "Let me kiss you now? I didn't want to wait until the date." Y/N laughed along with him, letting herself go and kissing Mason as she had always dreamed. And so, with laughter and a promise of honesty, Mason and Y/N took the first step towards a new beginning, redefining not just their friendship, but building something more meaningful and true.

[tomsparkyr]

biggest supporter - mykhailo mudryk.

requested by - anon.

request - could i request something cute with mudryk where you’re the team’s photographer please?

“you don’t have to hang around with me, you know?”

mykhailo looked up from one of the new camera’s you had and chuckled before saying, “i want to.”

perhaps it was because you were ukrainien also or because he liked you. he wasn’t sure on that. but he was sure that he loved spending time with you.

“you should be in training.” you shook your head at the blonde haired boy, who only sighed and jumped off the desk. “when will i see you next?”

he handed you your bag, which is what he was helping you pack before you left. “i’m in next week on matchday, so then.”

mykhailo wished he could see you before then but he was too scared to ask you out. the thought of you saying no was constantly on his mind so he didn’t have the courage to ask.

“i’ll walk you to the front,” he offered and you smiled at him, both of you walking in a comfortable silence to the exit.

waving you off, mykhailo was unable to hide the smile on his face. a hand on his bicep pulled him out of his trance and he turned to see enzo.

“she likes you too, you know?”

he scoffed, shaking his head in disbelief. “she’s never even made it obvious to me.”

“well it’s obvious to the rest of us.”

mykhailo didn’t believe him but during training, nicolas, reece and levi told him that enzo was telling the truth. you liked him and he should do something about it.

+

there was a lot of pressure on mykhailo to score.

his performances on the pitch hadn’t been good and he was noticing the criticism from fans and commentators.

you were sat on the staff bench with your camera out, snapping photos for social media when mykhailo walked over to you.

“mykhailo, it’s nearly kick off.”

“do you think i’m bad?”

you were stunned at how sudden his words were and you shushed him immediately. “don’t think bad things about yourself.”

“that didn’t answer my question.”

“well, i think you’re amazing. just because you’ve not scored goals doesn’t mean you’re bad.”

mykhailo seemed to be satisfied and he left you, leaving you confused. why would he want your input?

+

he scored.

he finally did it.

it felt like he was on cloud nine when he put it in the back of the net, hearing the cheers of the fans and seeing the smiles on their faces.

but the best part was your reaction.

mykhailo noticed you jumping up and down, immediately looking for you after scoring. everyone was surrounding him, giving him positive words.

all he wanted was the match to end so he could see you.

and when it did and they got three points, he didn’t even bother going to the changing rooms. mykhailo set out to find you.

he knew immediately after an away game, the photographers would go back to their cars and upload the photos to their computer, emailing them to the managers.

spotting your car, he knocked on the window, seeing you jump a little but noticing that it was only him.

you unlocked the doors and he got into the passenger seat, practically high from the adrenaline.

“congratulations,” you squealed, pulling him into a hug. for mykhailo, this was like heaven. your scent was like home.

“that was for you.”

he noticed the faint blush on your cheeks and nearly blushed himself before seeing your computer screen. “wow, are these what you took?”

“oh, yeah. do you like them?”

moving the mouse, you clicked between the different photos before landing on one of him.

“can you send me that one?”

nodding, you took your memory stick out of the laptop and packed everything away into your bag, shoving it into the back seat.

“well, i should probably get going,” you nervously chuckled, mykhailo nodding when he realised he hadn’t even changed out of his kit.

“yeah, i’ll see you soon.”

but before he left the car, he paused for a second and turned to face you again. “i’m going to wash this top and give it to you.”

“me, why?”

your eyebrows screwed up as you examined him, as if he was crazy. “but don’t you want to keep it? you were wearing it whilst scoring your first goal.”

“it’s technically not my first goal for the club, so i’m not really bothered.”

you grinned at him, suddenly feeling rather closer to him than usual. “can i kiss you?” his voice went octaves lower as he asked for permission, and you nodded before his lips met your’s.

and when you went home that night, memories to remember for a lifetime, you noticed he had posted the photo on instagram.

the caption read ‘for my biggest supporter.’

[tomsparkyr]

Like Magnets

Note - please read this if you haven’t already before reading 🩷 this fic won’t be for everyone so I just want to prepare you. Feedback would be lovely and I hope you enjoy this 🥰 I know it’s insanely long but I was trying something 😂

Pairing - Mason Mount × Reader

Word count - 18.7k

Warnings - angst, fluff and smut

Two objects containing charge with the same direction of motion have a magnetic attraction force between them. Each magnet has a north and South Pole and opposite poles are attracted to each other.

You wondered if this was why you felt so drawn to Mason. He was the north to your south and as soon as you caught sight of him you’d felt taken in by him. Stuck together like magnets from early on as you wondered where have you been all my life from the first moment you spoke and always finding yourself drawn back to each other.

To say you’d never been on a dating app would be a lie, you just didn’t like admitting it to people. It made you feel embarrassed and uncomfortable even though practically everyone did it but the years of your mum warning you about stranger danger made you want to keep it to yourself. Whenever she asked how you met the man you’d been on a date with you’d conjure up some lavish story of how your eyes met over a dimly lit coffee shop and you knew you had to speak to him. Rather than the truth of him sliding into your dm’s with some corny joke and the need for physical interaction and intimacy outweighed the logical part of your brain.

You weren’t looking for a relationship, content with how your life was right now but that didn’t mean you didn’t like talking to boys. There was a part of you sometimes that wanted to just flirt for a bit, to make someone feel good and have them make you feel good in return yet most conversations you’d had on the app lately had been dry and boring. You were desperate tonight though, quickly updating your profile and adding a few new pictures before you got to swiping.

Mason stood out to you straight away.

He had a mix of goofy and sweet pictures that let you know he didn’t take himself too seriously but he was attractive and seemed fun so you swiped right without a second thought before another screen flashed up instantly.

That fact he’d already liked you first made you smile and the itch to talk to him was stronger than it had been with anyone else so you quickly tapped send a message. Thinking you’d stand out and put a bit of the hard work in first but to your surprise he’d got there before you. A message flashing up as you were halfway through writing your own.

No boring hi, how are you? x or a crude comment about the shape of your body and you warmed to him straight away even if his lines could use some work.

His words made you blush and you could tell how cheeky he was through the screen. The fact he didn’t seem to be taking anything too seriously too made you feel even more comfortable and you couldn’t wipe the smile off your face as you got settled into your sofa.

You spoke for a couple of hours, flirting back and forth lightly before you decided to take the plunge and send him a big compliment. Letting him know he had really pretty eyes and this in turn seemed to give him a confidence boost to start complimenting you more. Telling you how pretty you looked and how he thought you might be trouble yet his words just excited you.

You spoke about what you wanted, both not looking for a relationship as such, just a little bit of fun for now and you felt like you’d hit the jackpot for fun with Mason. You didn’t stop laughing as you texted back and forth and you knew he was different from anyone else you’d spoken to.

You’d never clicked with someone so quickly like this before. Not wanting to shut the app down in case you missed a message but they were flying back and forth so quickly you didn’t have a chance to do anything else until you told him you were off to take a quick shower and the cheeky emojis he sent you made your cheeks flush.

You were as quick as you could be, jumping back on the app so you could let him know you were back in hope that he hadn’t gone to sleep yet but his next messages made your chest tighten with nerves.

You thought he could tell you were nervous, quickly pulling on your pj’s and getting into bed but your heart was pounding. You’d never called a boy this quickly before, usually giving it at least a week before you gave your number out let alone a phone call but the need to hear what he sounded like outweighed everything

In the end you sucked it up, adding him to your contacts before pressing the call button and it only rung once before he picked up.

‘Hello?’

It was like time stopped. His voice causing goosebumps to rise all over your skin as your breath caught in your throat and your mind went blank. God he sounds sexy you thought. Knowing you had to say something back but the sound of his voice was intimidating.

‘H-hi, Mason. it’s y/n’

‘Ah, hello trouble’ he laughed, making you breathless in an instant and you wondered how you’d be able to get through the call without exploding. ‘Wasn’t too sure I’d hear from you. Thought I’d scared you off’

‘Yeah I um- s-sorry im just a bit nervous’ you chuckled laying flat down on your bed and even though you were alone you felt like you had to be quiet. Like you were speaking to someone you shouldn’t be but the excitement thrilled you.

‘I can tell’ he laughed, but you knew he wasn’t making fun of you. ‘There’s no need to be though, you can trust me I promise’

‘I know’ you whispered, thinking you didn’t know him enough to trust him but something deep down made you feel like you could.

‘Good’ he laughed before diving into asking you a million questions about yourself. Your favourite food, favourite drink, favourite colour, favourite trip you’d ever been on and the more you talked the more you laughed until your cheeks ached.

‘It’s nice to hear your voice’ he whispered as he was waiting for your giggles to quieten down and his confession made your face burn.

‘You too’ you smiled, your skin flushing as the pair of you spoke and you had to stop yourself from curling into a ball and giggling in excitement.

You spoke for hours, letting him in on things you’d never told anyone and even though he was just a voice on the phone, it felt intimate and like he was right there next to you. Spilling all his secrets to you himself and you’d never felt closer to anyone.

You wondered if the dynamic would have changed too much, going from texting where you could half think about what you were saying to speaking directly and being too nervous to say anything remotely interesting but it felt the same and he was just as funny as his texts.

‘I can’t believe it’s 2am’ he laughed. ‘We’ve been on the phone for hours and I don’t wanna hang up’ he confessed and the sound of his laughter was like music to your ears.

‘Neither do I’

‘So same time tomorrow then yeah?’ He laughed, and even though you were tempted you knew you couldn’t.

‘I wish, I’m actually going out with my girlfriends tomorrow’ you told him but already you felt like ditching them for a night on the phone with him.

‘Anywhere exciting?’ He asked, unsure if you should tell him where you were going but you felt so free talking to him that the words came tumbling out of your mouth before you could stop them.

‘That club in town. Luna I think it’s called?’

‘Oh I know the one’

‘Yeah I’m not usually one for going out to places like that so it’s my yearly trip’ you laughed, hearing him chuckle on the other end.

‘Well I won’t keep you up much longer. Thank you for calling, I know it was a bit forward. Truth is, I’ve never wanted to hear someone’s voice so badly before’ he told you lowly and you felt your whole body tingle. He was making you feel special and you were loving every second of it.

‘Well I hope it lives up to your expectations’

‘Oh and then some’ He laughed. ‘You’re proper sexy you know that?’

‘Oh stop it’ you laughed, face flushing as you tried to hide it in your pillow. His laugh ringing in your ears and all you could think about was wanting to see that pretty smile of his in person.

‘Nah nah, im serious. Proper sexy teachers voice’ he told you, knowing the effect he was having on you but he just kept going.

‘Mason I swear to god-‘

‘Ohh Is someone getting a little flustered?’ He laughed ‘You wait till I see you in person I’m gonna tease the life out of you’

‘You wanna see me in person?’ You questioned. The same nervousness that was present when you first called him earlier now back at the thought of seeing him.

‘Of course I do, I’d be mental not to’ he laughed, and you felt dumb for even questioning him at this point. ‘You’re gorgeous and funny like what’s not to like?’

‘Unless I’m a catfish’ you joked, trying to deflect slightly but he wasn’t having any of it. Practically feeling his smile trickle through the phone.

‘All the more reason to see you and put those rumours to bed then, so to speak’ he teased as you gasped quietly, catching onto the double meaning in his words.

You didn’t want to stop talking but soon enough the pair of you were yawning your heads off and you had to say goodbye. Going to bed with a massive smile on your face even if you did miss him as soon as the call ended.

The next morning you woke up to a cute good morning text from Mason. Reminding you that last night wasn’t a dream and Mason was real and gorgeous and as funny as ever. Spending all day texting and flirting until you thought you’d get in trouble for being on your phone too much at work but soon enough you were at dinner with your friends before your big night out.

You all caught up about what you’d been up to lately, making sure you left out the last 24 hours as you were unsure about what they would say but thankfully you were able to keep it under wraps until you were in the queue for the club.

‘Are you alright?’ Your best friend Rose asked, looking at you with a slight smile. ‘You’ve got the weirdest look on your face’

‘What do you mean?’ You laughed, stuffing your phone into your pocket before looking up at the three of them.

‘I don't know, like, nervous almost. You’ve got your little scary smirk on’ Rose laughed and you rolled your eyes at her words. For some reason whenever you were nervous or scared your instincts made you want to laugh so it was no wonder you couldn’t keep the smile off your face knowing Mason was so close by.

‘Look if I tell you, I need you to be cool about it yeah?’ You told the three of them. Pulling them all further into you a little bit so hopefully no one else could hear before swallowing down a gulp and spilling your guts. ‘I matched with a guy on that app and he’s just text me saying he’s here’

‘God y/n, I thought it was something serious then’ Kimmy laughed, as the others shook their heads with a smile.

‘No you don’t get it, we matched yesterday’ you confessed, watching their eyes go wide and you knew then you couldn’t tell them you’d already spoken to him on the phone.

‘Oh wait, is he some sort of weird stalker? Do you wanna go?’ Sam asked as they all looked to move but you were quick to stop them.

‘No no’ you laughed, grabbing her wrist. ‘He’s not a stalker, I don’t think he is at least anyway and I know I sound insane cause I’ve known him 24 hours but we really connected and I’m just a bit nervous to maybe see him’

‘Is he cute?’ Rose asked, eyebrows wiggling in your direction but you just bit your lip and nodded.

‘Well let’s get you inside as quick as we can, I’m making it my mission to get you some tonight’ she told you and you rolled your eyes at her playfully. Thankful they weren’t making too much of a big deal out of it.

You weren’t in the queue much longer, getting yourself in and over to the bar as quickly as you could so you could get some drinks down you but no matter what you drunk your nerves seemed to make the alcohol not work and you felt the same as usual.

You gave it an hour in the end, knowing it would be best to just see him and get it over with so you grabbed your phone and texted him, thinking he wouldn’t see it for a while but to your surprise he text you back straight away.

As soon as you sent the last text you tummy dropped. A sick and nervous feeling settling into your skin as you shakily got up from your table and made your way to the bar. The girls letting you know they were keeping their eye on you and to just wave at them if you didn’t feel safe.

Thankfully there was a seat right at the end of the bar, your legs not being able to hold you steady as the nerves fully kicked in. The drinks and shots you’d been downing for courage may as of well have just been water as you felt stone cold sober. Heart pounding in your ears as your breathing began to speed up so you kept your fingers tapping on the bar, your head facing forwards so you didn’t accidentally catch a glimpse of him and be tempted to run.

It felt like he was taking a lifetime, wondering if he’d walked in, saw you and turned around as he hadn’t liked what he’d seen but just as you were about to look over to your girls you felt a hand on your lower back and Mason's voice by your ear.

‘Y/n?’

In a flash your eyes were looking up and into his. Even in the dark lighting you wanted to drown in them and all you could think about was the fact his pictures didn’t do him justice.

He was quite possibly the prettiest man you’d ever seen in your life. The fluorescent lights of the club accented the freckles across his perfect nose and his lips looked plump and kissable. You knew you needed to speak but he’d left you speechless so you snapped yourself out of it so you could try and speak to him properly.

‘H-hi Mason’ you stuttered, finally getting to see his smile in person and you thought you might melt on the spot. The twinkle in his eye making your tummy flip and you weren’t sure if it were possible to be around him for too long as he was so overwhelming.

‘Hey, you alright?’

‘Yeah, you?’ You asked, watching his smile grow as he caught onto how nervous you were.

‘Better now’ he winked, his face getting closer to yours so he could hear you a bit better. ‘It’s kinda loud down here. I’m upstairs, do you wanna join me?’ He asked, his eyes flickering over your body before coming back up to look at your face.

‘I’ve never been upstairs before’ you told him, realising how stupid you must have sounded but upstairs was vip and almost impossible to get into. ‘guess I need to get used to that with you though huh?’ You teased and you watched his cheeks flush ever so slightly in what looked like embarrassment.

‘Well we can change that if you want. You can grab your friends too, I don’t want it to look like I’m kidnapping you’ he laughed but you wouldn’t have minded if he had at this point. The fact he was constantly trying to make you comfortable warmed your heart too so without a second thought you sent him a nod. His smile making your heart flutter as you felt your own lips mirror it.

‘I’ll just get them, one sec’ you told him, walking off to get them and you knew his eyes were on your legs and bum in the tight dress you had on.

You gathered the girls quickly, telling them you were all going upstairs and you could read the excitement on their faces. Quickly following you back over to him where they all shared a quick hello before he led the way out.

‘Take my hand, so we don’t get separated’ he told you, linking your fingers together as soon as you gingerly placed your hand in his before he sent a wink in your direction and pulled you with him to the vip area.

The bouncer let you all through immediately, rounding the corner to a large staircase where he pulled you in next to him.

‘Ladies first’ he smiled, gesturing for the others to go up before you and once you were finally at the top you watched the three of them make their way straight to the dance floor leaving you and Mason alone again.

‘Can I get you a drink?’ He smiled, pulling you along to the bar and you nodded at him furiously, knowing you needed something to pep you up a bit.

‘Yes please, I think the alcohol downstairs is broken. I don't feel any different’ you told him. Hearing his laugh tickle your ears as a sense of pride washed through you knowing you’d made him laugh.

Once you got to the bar, you felt his arm snake around your body, pulling you into his side and once he saw you were comfortable with his proximity he pulled you in front of him, sandwiching you in between his front and the bar and soon enough you felt his hands settle on your hips.

‘Is this okay?’ He asked, lips right by your ear as he spoke and you knew you were turning redder by the second. In the end you just nodded as he squeezed your waist. ‘What would you like to drink, love?’

You were barely able to get out your order, his scent intoxicating you as he relayed your order to the waiter before you went and grabbed a seat together. Close enough to his friends so that he could point them out but not close enough that they could hear what you were saying. Sitting close enough to each other so that your thighs touched before he planted his hand on your knee making your mouth go dry instantly.

It was a little awkward for the first ten minutes or so, both of you blushing and stumbling your way though the conversation but the more you spoke, the closer you became. His arm now around your shoulder and his hand on your thigh as you giggled about how scared you both were to see each other for the first time but now you felt like you did on the phone last night. It felt intimate and like you were the only two in the room. Faces creeping closer and closer together until you could feel his breath on your cheek but it was his friends eyeing the pair of you up across the room that made you not want to push things any further.

‘Mason? Why do you friends keep looking at us weird?’ You asked, his eyes flicking over to them so they’d look away before he was looking back at you.

‘Just ignore them’ he told you, rolling his eyes as if he were annoyed at them before turning you to him a little more so you couldn’t see them as well.

‘I’m gonna go to the loo quickly’ you told him. Standing up and shuffling passed him so you could make your way to the bathroom and you felt his eyes on you the whole time. Chancing a quick look back at him to find him already looking at you and you couldn’t help but giggle as you walked away. Thankfully your makeup was still intact and your hair still looked good so you felt alright enough to go back out but when you made it back to your seat Mason was nowhere to be found.

He wasn’t far though. Stood next to his friend as they spoke intensely so you creeped over and stood behind the wall nearby so you could listen in but not let them see you. Eager to know what they were talking about.

‘Mate, can you stop looking at her like that? You’re making her feel uncomfortable’ Mason told him, his voice serious and you heard a huff come from the other boy before he spoke.

‘I’m sorry mate, but you know you shouldn’t be-‘

‘No, we’re not doing this’ Mason interrupted. Shutting down whatever his friend was about to say. ‘Look I know what I’m doing, just back off’ he told him and you weren’t sure you wanted to listen anymore so you wandered back over to the bar but not even two minutes later you felt his hands on your waist from behind. Pulling you back into his body before he nestled his face into your neck. ‘Hey, I’ve been looking for you’

‘You found me’ you smiled, but he could tell your voice seemed a little off so he pulled back, spinning you around to face him before stepping closer to you so you were trapped between him and the bar again only this time you were facing him.

‘Hey, what’s up?’ One hand on your lower back as the other tilted your face up to look at him. Even though you had practically been sat in his lap for the better part of an hour this was the closest you’d been all night. He was smiling at you softly and you couldn’t help but rest your cheek in his palm as his soft eyes captured yours. ‘Y/n? What is it?’

‘Your friend doesn’t like me, does he?’ You asked and you watched his face fall before you carried on. ‘Why shouldn’t you be talking to me?’

‘It’s not you, babe. He’s just a bit protective’ he told you. The pet name making you want to smile so you pursed your lips. He knew what you were doing straight away so he quickly pinched your cheek to make you laugh before wrapping his other arm around your waist so he could pull you closer to his body and the only thing you could do was rest your hands on his chest. ‘I think it’s cause we only started talking yesterday and he thinks I’m being a bit reckless’

‘It is a bit nuts when you say it like that’

‘I know’ he laughed, lips falling on your forehead so he could press a quick kiss there and you felt every hair on your skin stand up. ‘It's weird like, I feel like I know you already. You don’t feel like a stranger to me’

‘I feel like that too’

‘Yeah?’ He asked, his nose bumping yours lightly and you knew it wouldn’t take much to reach up and kiss him. ‘Maybe we’re moving too quickly but I can’t get enough of you. Every second I’m with you I just want more’ he confessed as you reached up to cup his jaw lightly.

‘Mason?’

‘Yeah?’

‘Kiss me’ You whispered, taking the plunge to ask as you knew you were both dancing around the subject and all you wanted was to feel him against you.

You saw an unreadable emotion flash through his eyes. Nerves maybe? Or something else? You weren’t sure but it was gone as soon as it came. Watching his tongue poke out from between his lips so he could wet them slightly before he started to lean down.

You were no angel, you’d kissed a fair few strangers on nights out before but you this was different. A tingle running from the top of your head and all the way down your spine to your core as he brushed his lips against yours softly. Pulling back for just a beat before diving right back in to kiss you even harder.

The way he gripped your waist so tightly before wrapping his arms around you fully made you feel oddly safe. Like being this close to him was right where you were supposed to be and you couldn’t help but smile onto his lips. Butterflies swarming your body as the touch of him made you weak.

‘Damn’ he laughed, letting you tuck your face into his neck as you held each other for a few moments before you noticed Rose frantically waving at you from over Mason's shoulder.

‘I think the girls need me’ you laughed, watching Mason whip round to see what you were looking at before looking back at you with a cheeky smile.

‘I’ll wait for you here, yeah?’ He whispered, pressing a kiss to your forehead before pulling back again. ‘I feel bad, I kinda stole you tonight’

‘You can steal me whenever you like’ you winked, kissing his neck lightly as you felt him shiver. ‘I think I should dance some of this alcohol off as well’

‘Don’t want you making any bad decisions huh?’ He teased, pinching your bum before realising you. ‘Take your time I’ll be here’

You joined the girls on the dance floor, the three of them surrounding you and asking you a million questions but you just blushed and stumbled your way through all of them.

‘Bestie, just go home with him. You know you want to’ Sam laughed as you tried to hide your face in embarrassment.

‘He’s been undressing you with his eyes all night and you clearly like him. Let the man have some, it’s just sex’ Rose added in and you knew she was right. The whole reason the pair of you spoke in the first place was for some fun, you just didn’t know it would be happening this quickly.

The girls left shortly after, making you turn your location on so they could keep an eye on you and you made your way back to Mason and his friends. The one who’d been speaking about you before sending you a soft smile but you knew there was something else behind it.

‘Where are you friends?’ Mason asked, pulling you into his lap and wrapping his arm around you.

‘They left about five minutes ago’

‘Oh yeah?’ He laughed. ‘So I’ve finally got you all to myself huh?’ He murmured into your neck but you were ready to take the plunge now and get what you wanted.

‘How about you come home with me so you can really have me all to yourself’ you teased, watching his eyes light up before he buried his face in your neck.

‘Are you sure?’ he whispered just below your ear. Kissing your neck lightly and you knew there was no way you were leaving without him now.

‘I’m sure’ you shuddered, feeling his hands squeeze your waist before dropping a heavy kiss on your lips.

‘Grab your coat babe, you’ve pulled’ he teased. Grabbing his own things as you made your way back downstairs to get your stuff from the cloakroom. Meeting him back upstairs so he could take you out a secret way as you ordered an Uber back to yours.

You’d barely been inside five minutes and he was on you. Kissing you like he might never kiss you again as he slowly undressed you with wide eyes. Every touch of his fingertips felt like fire as he devoured you and you couldn’t seem to keep your hands off of each other.

You let him touch and kiss wherever he pleased and for just sex you were surprised at how intimate it was. His dark eyes drinking you in before staring longingly into yours as he made you see stars. Again feeling that pull to him just like always and you didn’t want to let him go ever again.

The next morning Mason was awake before you, laying on his back as he looked up at the ceiling and you could tell he was in his own little world so you just laid and waited for him to realise you were awake.

Soon enough he was looking over to you. A soft smile on his face as you locked eyes and your heart thumped in your chest. It had been a while since you’d woken up next to a boy and you weren’t sure what you were doing but soon enough he was reaching for you. Tucking you under his arm and into his chest so he could press a kiss to your forehead but you couldn’t stop yourself from thinking something was off.

‘Is everything okay, Mason?’

‘Yeah, of course’ he told you softly. Pulling back to look at you and the expression on his face made you melt. ‘I’m waking up next to a beautiful woman, what could be better?’ he joked and you nuzzled into his chest a bit more as you smiled. ‘You got plans today’

‘Nah, just having a tidy up I think. You?’

‘I’ve got some stuff to sort this afternoon, but maybe I could buy you breakfast first?’ He offered and you nodded furiously into his chest at the thought of spending more time with him.

So he ordered the pair of you some food and you ate it in bed in just your underwear as you spoke about all that had happened in the last few days. Still not really believing he was in front of you and in your bed but soon after you’d eaten he was ready to make you believe again. Whimpering his name into the air as he buried his face between your thighs.

You didn't see him after that night until a few weeks later. During that time his messages became few and far between but you figured he may not have been a texting person so you let it slide as you were still learning about each other and how this whole thing would work. You’d both said it was only a bit of fun but unfortunately for you, you’d become a little too attached too quickly.

You were beginning to loose hope a little bit when you hadn’t heard from him for two days but all of a sudden he sent you an offer you couldn’t refuse.

You still remember the look on his face when you caught eyes in the restaurant. His whole expression lighting up as a look of relief washed over him and you melted into his arms as he held you. Pressing a kiss to your temple before you sat down across from him.

It felt like picking up just where you left off, him holding your hand over the table as he hung off your every word. Smiling shyly at you as his eyes raked over your figure and even in public your need for him grew.

It was almost like he could see it in your eyes so after the bill was paid, you asked if he fancied coming back to yours for a nightcap and you were glad that he accepted straight away. Barely letting you shut the front door before he pulled you for a heated kiss that made your knees weak and it only hit you then how much you missed him these past few weeks.

You’d said it yourselves, you were only looking for a little bit of fun but you craved him like you’d never done anyone else. You wanted to drown in those big brown eyes every second he looked at you and with every kiss over your naked skin your need for him multiplied.

He knew exactly how to take care of you, knowing your body like a book he’d read a thousand times before and he cherished every page like it was the first time he’d seen it. Reacting to every noise you made with his sole focus on making you feel as good as humanly possible. But it was a two way street and as much as he overwhelmed and consumed you, you knew you were making him feel just as good.

‘Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’ve missed you’ you told him quietly, your mouth running away with you as you came down from your highs but the small giggle you heard from next to you made you smile. Mason's fingers threading through yours gently as you looked at him and his smile made your heart race.

‘We’ll don’t take this the wrong way either, but I missed you too’

‘Could have fooled me’ you chuckled, watching his face fall slightly before he pulled you onto his chest so he could hold your jaw and look at you properly.

‘What do you mean?’

‘Sorry, I didn't mean it to come out like that’ you told him, shaking your head at yourself as you felt like you’d ruined things with your silly backhanded comment but he still had a small smile playing on his lips and you knew he hadn't taken too much offence to it.

‘I know I’m not the best at texting but that doesn’t mean I’m not thinking about you’ he told you softly. Kissing your temple before looking back at you again. ‘I can show you again if you like’ he laughed, hand trailing down your neck to your chest and when you felt his thumb run over your nipple you couldn’t help but let out a soft moan.

‘Nah you’re alright’ you laughed, watching his face fall slightly before he smiled, realising you were only joking as he shook his head at you like he wasn’t best pleased with your joke and you knew he was about to bite back.

‘Oh shut up’

‘Make me’ you whispered, watching his eyes turn dark instantly before he dipped his head. Claiming your lips with his own and swallowing the moan that erupted from your throat as he trailed his hand back up to your neck and gave it a gentle squeeze.

So you let him show you again.

And a couple of weeks after that you let him show you once more. Him sticking around for a day extra that time and even though he was giving you no reason to worry, there was something in the back of your mind that concerned you. He came into your life so suddenly each time and was gone again in a flash so you told yourself next time he popped up you were going to have a proper conversation with him and say your piece. Thankfully he was right on time, texting you again a few days later and your tummy erupted in butterflies as his name flashed up on your phone.

He was over in the next 15 minutes, joining you under the blanket before diving into your m&m’s and it felt like you’d never been apart. Blushing as he pressed a loving kiss to your forehead but the look on your face must have prompted him to speak as a shy look took over his face.

‘I need to be honest with it about something’ he gulped, fingers trailing over his face like he did when he was nervous. ‘I know you’re not looking for a relationship or whatever but I still need to tell you’

‘What is it?’ You questioned, not liking the way he mentioned about you not wanting a relationship as the dread sunk into you.

‘I know you can tell something is a little off with me, coming and going like anything and it’s not fair to keep you in the dark. I… I have a girlfriend’ he gulped, eyes shooting to the floor. ‘Well not right now I don’t but… it’s complicated’

His words hit you like a slap to the face. A girlfriend? But how? None of it made sense but the icky feeling of being the other woman soon took over as you pulled away from him.

‘Are you cheating on her… with me?’

‘No no wait, it’s not like that at all’ he told you, turning to face you so he could explain a little better. Reaching for your hands and against your better judgement you let him hold them. ‘We’re not together right now, yeah? Haven’t been for a little while, I promise. I’d never do that to you, or anyone. I’m not a cheater, I just…’

‘What?’

‘It’s complicated and I know it’s not healthy but we’re on and off again like you wouldn’t believe. It’s the same pattern all the time, she breaks up with me over nothing and ignores me for a few days. I worry myself sick cause I don’t know what she’s doing or who she’s with and when she’s finally over her strop I go crawling back with my tail between my legs’

‘Well that doesn’t sound fun at all’ you pouted, a little bit of sympathy seeping its way in but you were still confused and a little hurt by the fact he’d kept this from you.

‘Its not. And I know I should just end it once and for all but… I don’t know, it’s like I can’t. I love her’

You couldn’t deny it stung a little to hear him say he loved another girl after you’d slept with him multiple times but you understood. You both said you were just looking for a bit of fun so the fact he’s got some weird relationship on the side shouldn’t have bothered you too much but it really did. He’d kept it from you from the start and you had so many unanswered questions swirling around in your brain.

‘I know none of this is fair on you and now I’ve dragged you into this weird thing so I’m sorry’

‘Do you ever think of me, when you’re with her?’ You asked, your mouth tumbling out questions before you really knew what you wanted to say but the sad look on his face was making your heart break.

‘Sometimes’ he admitted quietly and you didn’t know what to think. ‘A lot, actually. Things are different with you, you feel like a warm blanket when she’s left me out in the cold. I just got sick and tired of worrying and waiting for her to decide to come back that’s all’

‘Why do you keep going back?’

‘I’m not even sure at this point’ he laughed, resting his head on the back of the sofa and you followed suit so you could lean back next to him. Both looking at each other as he began to open up to you. ‘We’re childhood sweethearts. She's my first everything like she’s all I’ve ever known and we’ve fallen into the most ridiculous pattern but I can’t make it stop. Trust me I’ve tried. It’s exhausting I swear but you do weird things when you love someone’

‘Is she good to you, when you’re together?’ You questioned, trying to get to the bottom of why he kept going back to her but as soon as you asked you realised you didn’t want to know.

‘She’s perfect at first, but it never lasts that long. It’s like I’m addicted to that high of when we get back together that I just roll with the punches now’ he confessed and your heart broke for him. ‘I just wanted to be honest with you. I know I haven’t been and I’m sorry’

‘Well I appreciate you telling me’ you sighed . Thinking this was it and he was letting you down gently but when you felt his hand on your cheek you looked up at him with wide eyes.

‘I know it’s selfish, and I know I shouldn’t but I want to keep you in my life still. If you’re okay with that?’

‘Oh I’m… Mase I’m not sure-‘

‘Please, I can’t not have you around. I feel like you’re meant to be in my life, like I feel different around you. I feel myself, you know?‘

You felt it too. You felt yourself around him and you wanted to be selfish and keep him in your life so against your better judgement you felt yourself nodding in agreement.

‘We can just take it day by day and see how we feel’ you nodded. Knowing you were setting yourself up for a fall but something inside of you didn’t want to let him go.

‘Yeah okay, like it’s still early days, but I’d really like for us to be friends at least’ he smiled. The word friends breaking your heart a tiny bit as they fell from his lips but you soldiered on. Smiling and nodding like you were fine with all of it.

‘Can I ask you something else?’ You whispered. Things clicking into place the more you thought about them and since he seemed to be being honest with you so you felt like you could ask him more.

‘Anything’

‘Your friend that first night? When he said we shouldn’t be talking it wasn’t because we were rushing things was it? It was because of her’

‘No that’s not completely true’ he told you. Picking your hand up so he could play with your fingers while he spoke. ‘She was part of it yeah but he really did think it was nuts we only matched the day before’

‘Have you done this before? Seen other girls in between’

‘Never, I swear. You’re the second person I’ve ever slept with in my life.’ he told you, looking straight into your eyes and this time you believed him. ‘Wait one sec’ he told you. Reaching for his phone so he could pull up his emails before pulling you into his chest so you could see ‘See? This is my registration email for that app’ he explained, pointing to the time and date and you saw it was the day you first spoke around about an hour before you matched. ‘You’re the only girl I spoke to on there too’ he laughed. Opening the app up so you could check his inbox and to your surprise you were the only profile there. ‘Do you believe me?’

‘I believe you’ you sighed. Looking up into his eyes as his flickered all over your face before landing on your lips. You felt awful but you ached for him. Wanting to look past everything he’d just said and throw yourself at him so you could feel him like you’d wanted to for days. And to your surprise he seemed to be thinking exactly the same.

You knew you shouldn’t, but when he lent forward to kiss you, you let him. Sighing into his mouth as he kissed you softly before you pulled back. Foreheads touching as you looked down into your lap.

‘We can’t’

‘I know’ he sighed, bringing you into his chest so he could just hold you ‘I don’t wanna stop’ he told you earnestly. ‘But I get it. If you’re not comfortable sleeping together anymore that’s fine but I can’t not be around you’

‘Mase, I don’t know’ you gulped, suddenly thinking everything through. Not sure if you were able to be around him now when you knew what you wanted from him but his puppy dog eyes were making it hard to resist him.

‘I just need a friend, please’ he told you and you could feel yourself getting wrapped around his finger. You didn't want to be his shoulder to cry on but in this moment that’s all you could ever be.

‘Oh Mase’ you pouted. Threading your fingers through his before he rested his head on your shoulder. ‘I guess we can be friends. But no more sex yeah? Even when you are on a break’

‘Okay’ he nodded sadly, knowing it was the right choice but also knowing he still wanted you.

Your little routine continued, him doing the disappearing acting before showing up unannounced and you still remember the first time he tried to act coy about it but as the pair of you sunk down into your sofa you knew you had to address the elephant in the room.

‘Mason it’s fine, I know the drill. You can just tell me if you were with her last week’ you mumbled and you felt him sigh next to you before placing his head on your shoulder.

‘I was with her’ he told you quietly. His words slicing through you but you acted like it had no effect on you. You were friends and you promised you’d be there for him no matter what.

‘And?’

‘Rinse and repeat. She’s thrown me out again’

You didn’t respond. Not really knowing what to say as on one hand you were happy you had him back but you knew it wouldn't last long.

You weren't sure if it was helping, now you knew where he was spending the time he had away from you. Learning that Mason and his girlfriend, Robin, did in fact live together but Mason had a flat of his own he’d stay in whenever he needed to. You both agreed on never going there though just in case she turned up unannounced and each time he wanted to see you, he’d show up at your door.

Now you weren’t sleeping together and were just friends, you took a different route on how you spent your time together. Making him hot chocolate and feeding him biscuits as you let him vent. Telling you what crazy reason she had that time to kick him out from not putting the kettle back in its base properly to staying behind at training a little longer and forgetting to text her about it.

He never seemed bothered when he first got to you though. Always excited to see you and wrap you up in his arms and every time his chocolate eyes looked into yours you felt your resolve cracking a little more. You were friends and that’s what you had agreed on but you couldn’t deny there was still that same level of attraction and pull to one another.

You always wanted to touch him and kiss him. Always were thinking about him and wanting him with you as you did the most mundane tasks and as time went on you seemed to be spending more time together as his and Robin's disagreements became more frequent.

You knew it was probably the last thing you should be doing but you missed him and wanted to grill him about what had happened this time so whilst he was on the way over you quickly freshened up just in time for him to ring your buzzer.

‘Hello trouble’ he beamed, taking you into his arms so he could hold you tightly and you couldn't stop yourself from squeezing him back. You’d missed him more than you thought and the kiss he pressed to your cheek made you shiver. ‘Missed you’

‘Missed you too’ you told him quietly and you really had. He’d cancelled on you the week before after he promised he was on his way. Leaving you to drink two cups of hot chocolate yourself but he was here this time and you hated how relieved you felt.

It was around the sixth time he’d walked away from her that something changed. He came over just like usual and you made him something to eat as you sat and spoke about why she’d chucked him out this time but the way he was with you was slowly evolving as he placed his hand on your knee and rubbed his thumb across it

‘What’s this you’re watching?’

‘It’s a documentary about twin flames’

‘What a twin flame?’

‘It’s basically another word for a soulmate. Someone you have a deep connection with that can’t really be explained. Like they’re your person and you feel this pull to them. You’re meant to spend your life with them, like their your one’ you told him. Watching a cheeky smile spread across his face and you knew what he was about to say before he’d even said it.

‘So like us then?’

‘Well considering this is about a cult that ruined a load of people’s lives I hope not’ you laughed, trying to push him words away as they made you feel strange but he just wrapped an arm around you as he kissed your cheek. Pulling you further into his lap so you could be closer.

Each time he’d seen you he pushed it a little more, holding your hand, kissing your cheek and making cheeky comments to try and make you blush but he was extra touchy tonight. And you couldn’t say you weren’t enjoying the attention.

‘Can I have a cuddle please? A proper one’ he pouted and you knew what he meant instantly. You knew it was risky but the selfish part of you wanted to feel close to him so you did what he wanted. Lying down on your sofa before patting your chest and he climbed on top of you like an excited puppy. Resting his head in your neck as he wrapped his arms around you, his weight slightly crushing you but you didn’t mind. One arm around his shoulders as the other reached into his hair to scratch over his scalp.

‘That better?’ You asked, feeling him hum in satisfaction as he nestled himself into you even further and you wondered if he could hear your heart pounding in your chest with how close he was. Feeling his skin press against yours after so long felt comforting and exciting at the same time and you couldn’t help but reach down as press a kiss to his temple.

‘I always feel better with you’ he whispered, his lips moving against your neck making you shiver and you knew he felt it. Feeling his smile brush against you before he took the plunge and placed a gentle kiss to your neck.

You were turned on instantly, a shaky breath falling from your lips before you could stop it and you knew he could tell how much he was affecting you with one simple kiss.

So he didn’t stop. Gently sucking on your sweet spot as he littered your skin with kisses, but it was the way he pressed his crotch into your core that had you trembling.

‘Mase’ you whimpered. Tugging on his hair gently but this just caused I’m to growl into your neck before kneeling up so he could look you in the eyes.

‘Please, gorgeous. Please let me have you’ he begged quietly, eyes wide and dark as he dragged his bottom lip through his teeth. ‘I’ve been so good and I’ve kept my hands to myself for so long but I need you now baby, please’

You froze, not wanting to say no but knowing what saying yes meant and he took your lack of objection to mean he could touch you. One hand sneaking under your shirt to touch your bare waist and your eyes fluttered shut at the feeling. He was being so gentle with you, teasing you just the way you liked before his fingers travelled to your pj shorts. Reaching up the leg and pulling them to the side but as soon as his touch landed on your underwear you froze. Eyes meeting his immediately as he ceased his movements.

‘Tell me to stop and I will’ he uttered, but you both knew there was no going back so you shook your head ever so slightly to let him know it was fine to carry on and it only took a beat for him to move his fingers again. Stroking your folds over your underwear and the sensation was driving you insane. Bucking your hips up gently into his hand to let him know you needed more and he was happy to oblige.

His hands moved to your thighs, spreading them out so he could access you a bit easier before his fingers were back over your core. Resuming his movements before dipping his fingers past the hem of your underwear so he could touch you properly.

You gasped at the contact, his fingers feeling like magic after so long and you shut your eyes again before you felt him move to hover over you. His forehead resting on yours as you both stared into each other's eyes and the intensity made you shiver.

‘Don’t close your eyes baby, look at me’ he whispered, fingers pulsing inside of you as he spoke and you whimpered at the sound of his voice. ‘I’ve missed this, missed having you like this’

You couldn't deny you’d missed him too, but there was a reason why you hadn’t been intimate with him for the last few months. He was making you feel too good right in this second though to think about anything else and when you felt his bulge press against your thigh you knew you couldn’t wait any longer.

‘Masey please’

‘What is it, sweetheart?’ He asked, voice soft and slightly playful. You knew he knew what you wanted but he wanted you to ask for it. Threading your fingers through his hair so you could pull his face down and into your neck before finally telling him what he wanted to hear.

‘Fuck me, Mase’ you whispered in his ear, feeling him shudder at your words before a low growl fell from his lips.

‘Good girl’

So he did what you asked, taking his time to re explore your body before holding your hands above your head as he drove himself into you. Each thrust feeling better than the last until you were whimpering his name through your high. Letting him collapse onto your naked body before you both erupted into giggles and even though you knew you should have stopped him, you let him kiss you softly.

‘Sorry, I know we said no more sex but I can’t not have you, pretty girl’ he whispered, lips peppering soft kisses over your cheeks as you blushed at his words. ‘I’m so fucking obsessed with you’

‘Well that’s worrying’

‘Yeah, I’d get some sort of restraining order in place if I were you’ he teased, lips trailing back to your neck again and the sensation made you squirm in delight. ‘Such a good girl for me. You want me again?’

You could feel him already hard against your leg again and against your better judgement for the second time that evening you nodded against his lips. Swallowing his small chuckle at your neediness as you kissed him deeply again, the rules you’d set yourself to protect your heart thrown out the window as you let Mason do with you as he pleased.

Even though he would remind you that he was technically single, you knew it was wrong to fall back into the routine of sleeping together. Knowing he’d be off soon after, leaving you more hurt than you realised each time but you took it because being with him felt so good.

That was until you’d clearly let him get too comfortable and he began to walk all over you. Cancelling plans at the drop of a hat, always being on his phone around you as he constantly texted someone with a smile on his face and you were unsure if it was Robin or someone else he’d met but it still hurt just the same.

The real kicker came when you were looking at the menu for a restaurant Sam had sent you and Mason had caught sight of it over your shoulder. Questioning you where it was and when you explained it was somewhere you’d always wanted to try he promised to take you soon however two nights later you saw the pap pictures of him leaving the very same restaurant with Robin.

You felt crushed, that was your special place that you’d introduced him to and now it was ruined for you. No longer wanting to go there or speak to him for a while so when he text you the next day you left him on read.

You gave in though, like you always did. Mason explaining a few days later when he’d showed up at your door unannounced that she had caught him trying to book a table for the pair of you and he’d panicked and told her it was for her. Telling you he’d take you soon but you no longer cared for it and he knew he’d messed up that time. Being extra soft with you that night as he tried to show you how much he cared for you without any words.

As the weeks went on, you were starting to feel like he kept you around just for sex. Coming and going as he pleased as he knew you’d never deny him and give him what he wanted but a cheeky glance at your phone would prove otherwise eventually.

‘Why do you still have that app?’

‘What app?’

‘The dating app we met on. Why do you still have it downloaded’ he questioned, his tone full of anger and jealousy but in all honesty you’d just forgotten to delete it. You hadn’t been back on it since you’d got Mason's number but he didn’t need to know that.

‘Why wouldn’t I have it? I’m single, remember?’

‘I beg to differ’ he scoffed, knowing he’d crossed a line with his words but he held firm. ‘Delete it please’

‘No, why should I?’

‘Cause I don’t like the thought of you having it on there’

‘Well I’ll be honest Mase, I don’t give a shit what you don't like the thought of. You know where to go if you think differently’ you shrugged, hoping he’d drop the subject and move on but to your surprise he picked his stuff up and walked out your front door without another word. Slamming the door on the way out.

You didn't see him again for a week or so. Knowing he was probably with her whilst you two were sort of mad at each other was making you feel weird so you did what you could to distract yourself. Shopping dates and dinners with your girls and today you had a lunch date with Rose. Filling each other in about what you’d been up to lately but you kept all thoughts about Mason in the back of your mind until Rose left you to pop to the loo.

‘Fancy seeing you here’ you heard, Mason's voice ringing in your ears as the shock ripped through you as you looked up to him. His hand resting on your shoulder with a cheeky smirk plastered over his face.

‘Mason? What are you doing here?’

‘Just had a game of golf with Woody over the road’ he told you, head bobbing in the direction of where he’d just come from. ‘Why are you here?’

‘Late lunch with a friend’

‘Friend? Or date?’

‘Why does it matter? You have a girlfriend Mason’ you told him. Watching his face drop momentarily before his sly smile returned.

‘It doesn’t I guess’ he shrugged but you knew what he meant by that. It didn't matter to him if you were on a date because he knew you’d be crawling back to him as soon as he clicked his fingers and the realisation hit you like a truck. ‘Like you said, you’re single. I have to get going but I’ll text you yeah’ he smiled, dropping a kiss to the top of your head and walking away before you could say anything.

You managed to perk yourself back up before Rose got back. Quickly asking for the bill so she could rush off back to work yet when the waitress came you weren’t expecting her to let you know the bill had been fully paid for and you were free to go.

You knew who had paid instantly. Slight anger rolling through you as you know he’d only done it as he thought you were on a date and was trying to prove a point to you and whoever you were with so you sent him a quick text to let him realise how silly and possessive he’d been.

You felt bad about the last line, but you stood by it. Your whole relationship was him getting his own way and you knew you’d hit a nerve as he never text you back after that.

You were miserable, stuck in this weird middle ground with him where he could never be yours and you knew what you had to do when he eventually came over that evening even though you didn’t want to. His cheeky smile and soft touches had left a mark on you but it wasn't just that. Yeah the sex was great and you always felt a pull to him but you liked him as just Mason. The silly cheeky guy who never failed to make you laugh or brighten your day with just a text.

At least that was how you felt about him once anyway.

He texted you letting you know he’d be over soon so you busied yourself. Putting your dishes away and giving the place a quick hoover but you knew you were doing anything to just not think about what was about to happen.

This felt like make or break for you and him. You didn’t want to be his bit on the side anymore and you were done trying to comfort him through a situation he had full control over. Yes you both went into this knowing it was a bit of fun but things had changed and you were ready to put yourself first. Either he gave you all of him or you were done. Plain and simple.

The sound of your buzzer going filled you with dread.

You opened the door for him, standing off to the side and slightly behind the door so he couldn’t get to you in any way and you could tell he was confused by your standoffishness.

‘You okay?’ he asked, his brows pinched together like he was unsure of what was going on so you nodded at him before walking into your living room and sitting in the armchair so he couldn’t sit next to you

‘Mason I think we should talk’ you told him. Wanting to get in first so you could get your point across but he was looking back at you in confusion.

‘What is it?’

‘I want us to stop seeing each other’

‘What? No I don’t want that’ he explained, his voice and face becoming hard but you tried not to look at him. Knowing it would just make you change your mind. ‘I’m sorry for last week, yeah? It just caught me off guard but I don’t want us to stop’

‘I’m really unhappy, Mason’ you told him truthfully. Watching his face soften ever so slightly as he was clearly disappointed he’d made you upset so you dropped your eyes to the floor so you couldn’t let his emotions influence you. ‘I didn’t ask to be in the middle of you and her and I’m stopping it before it goes any further’

‘What do you want me to do?’ He offered, sounding desperate and you could see he wanted to get closer to you so wrapped your arms around yourself in an attempt to block him out.

‘I don’t want you to do anything. I’m just trying to protect myself and if you’re carrying on with her then I’m out’ you told him, your eyes flickering up to read his expression and he looked even sadder than before. ‘Cause I bet she doesn’t know about me does she? I bet you have to lie to her when you come and see me’

‘Well technically no. Whenever I come here me and here aren’t on speaking terms so there’s no point’ he huffed but you just rolled your eyes at him. Hating the way he always had an answer for everything. ‘But that’s besides the point, none of that matters anymore cause you’re not in the middle of anything’

‘What do you mean?’

‘That’s why I came over here, to tell you I’ve had enough and I just want you’ he told you softly before his big brown eyes were looking up into yours. His bottom lip wobbling as he tried to swallow down his tears and you felt awful instantly. ‘I can’t keep putting myself through this every other week, it’s stupid. Not to mention you, I’m so sorry for dragging you into this’

‘Are you really not going back?’ You whimpered, tears flooding your eyes at what he might be hinting at but you waited to let him speak to explain properly.

‘When I went home after seeing you today she kicked off about some event she’s going to tonight and I just can’t do it anymore’ he told you, shaking his head as he held a hand out to you. ‘Please come here’

You did as he asked, taking his hand before sitting in his lap so you could hold each other tightly and the overwhelming need to apologise flooded you.

‘Sorry Mase, I had no idea I just-‘

‘Shh, you’ve got nothing to be sorry for, okay? I’m the sorry one. I should've never let it get to this point’

As much as you agreed with him, you also had your part to play and before you knew it you were about to admit something you never thought you would. ‘I need to tell you something’

‘What is it babe?’ He asked, pulling away from you so he could look into your eyes and the soft look on his face melted you.

‘I think I like you’ you whispered, a look of shock on his face as your words sunk in. ‘Like, like like you, you know?’ You laughed, watching his eyes brighten as you tried to make light of the situation and you could see your favourite smile returning to his face. ‘I know I shouldn’t and I know this was never the plan but I do really like you and it kills me everytime you go back to her’ you explained. Your voice breaking at the end as you got emotional but his hand on your cheek brought you back to look at him. ‘But I don’t want to be in the middle of whatever weird game you and her have going on. How she’s making you feel is how I’m feeling and I don’t like it’

‘I never meant for that to happen I swear’ he breathed, kissing your forehead as he smiled sweetly at you. ‘You have no fucking idea how long I’ve waited for you to say that’ he laughed, pressing a light kiss to your cheek now but you were left slightly confused. ‘I like you too’

‘Really?’

‘Of course’ he laughed, pulling you tighter to his body as he nestled his face into your neck. ‘All this time I’ve been going back to her to try and get the feeling I always get when I’m with you’ he confessed ‘this just makes it more final for me you know? I’m done messing you around okay, I want you to be mine’

‘Good, cause I wanna be yours’ you laughed, cupping his jaw so you could stroke his cheek and lean down to kiss him properly. It was a kiss full of relief as you gently brushed your lips together after being apart for so long. One full of promises of better times ahead now you were both free to be with each other and you spent a little time talking things through before eventually landing on the topic of seeing each other earlier that day.

‘I know it’s stupid but after last week with the app and then today, I thought you were with someone else and I couldn’t take it. You’re mine okay?’ He confessed and you couldn’t help but let a small chuckle pass through your lips.

‘Ah, so you were jealous’

‘Incredibly so’ he laughed, not caring how he sounded. ‘And I felt stupid as fuck when you text me after and it was Rose. Like it really hit home then that i don’t want anyone else to have you. But I’m not being fair letting someone else have me’

‘I can’t believe we’ve finally got here’ you laughed. Disbelief laced through your voice as he looked up at you shyly. ‘You really want this then?’ You asked, watching him pick up your hands so he could kiss along your knuckles and you felt your heart thump at the sweet gesture. Loving that he couldn’t seem to keep his lips away from you.

‘Of course I do’ he laughed, pressing a gentle kiss to your nose that made you shiver. ‘Being with her, it’s shit. She’s fucking awful to me but I’m stuck in this weird toxic cycle we’re I she says jump and I say how high. But it’s always been different with you’ he confessed, his voice gentle but certain and you couldn't stop smiling. ‘That night we matched and we spoke on the phone for the first time, she’d ended things two days before. I told myself I was done and I was gonna get her out of my system so I went on that app with all the intentions of just finding a girl to sleep with but…’

‘But what?’

‘But I met you, and… I’ve never felt like that before. I just couldn’t get enough of you so yeah when you said you were going out the next night I convinced my friends to go there so I could see you’ he admitted shyly causing you to laugh. ‘You took my fucking breath away, you know that? I couldn’t stop myself from touching you cause I felt like if I didn’t then I couldn't survive. That first time I slept with you, I was expecting to feel shit. I was expecting to be thinking about her but I didn’t. Not for one second’ He told you, eyes all over your face as he was spilling his guts. ‘And all I’ve thought about is you ever since. You make me feel alive when I’ve been walking round like a zombie for years’

You couldn’t speak, his words turning you into a mess so you did the only thing you wanted to do with Mason and leaned into him for a kiss. You didn’t stop this time though, letting him claim you fully once more after so long but this felt different to every other time. It was soft and loving and he repeatedly reminded you that you were his and he was yours and you swore you’d never heard anything so beautiful before.

You laid there for hours, spilling your guts about how you’d missed each other and how excited you were to start fresh. Hands never leaving each other's bodies as well as your lips but when he went to check his phone after it kept vibrating you saw his face drop. Writing out a quick text before coming back to join you but you knew something had changed about him. He was antsy and quiet and constantly checking his phone before standing up and reaching for his clothes.

‘Listen, I’ve got to head home yeah? But I’ll text you in bit and I’ll come see you tomorrow okay?’ He told you, throwing his hoodie over his head and you felt an awful feeling settling in your tummy.

‘Oh um, where are you going?’ You asked, not content with letting him go without an explanation and you could read the guilty look on his face from a mile away.

‘I need to sort something out’ he shrugged but you knew him better than he thought and you knew all the warning signs. Thinking over everything he’d told you tonight and you knew you had to say something now to avoid more heartbreak down the line.

‘Mason I don’t believe you’

‘What? Why not?’ He laughed. Stuffing himself into his shoes as he grabbed his keys but his nonchalance was angering you.

‘Cause this whole night you haven't actually said it’s definitely over with her and now you’re just leaving so suddenly. Why can’t you just tell me where you’re going?’

‘Babe, i…‘

‘Tell me it’s over Mason’ you asked but he stood there just looking at you. Not able to speak so you probed him again. Knowing if you pushed him he’d spill and he looked on the verge of tears. ‘Mason please-‘

‘I can’t’ he whispered, cutting you off as you felt your heart shatter. ‘I have to go’

You let him walk to the front door in silence, quickly chucking on some underwear and a shirt and following him to the door where he was zipping up his coat and you knew you had to be firm with him this time.

‘You walk out the door Mason I promise you, I won’t let you back in’ you told him firmly. Watching his hand rest on the handle but he made no attempt to move it.

‘Y/n don’t do this’

‘You’re the one leaving not me’

‘You don’t understand’

‘No see I understand all of it’ you told him. Hands balled into fists as you tried to convey how you were feeling to him. ‘You’re doing to me what she does to you after you promised you wouldn’t and I won’t stand for it anymore. So I’ll tell you again. You leave Mason and I won’t let you back in’

You didn’t give him a chance to say anything else. Walking back into the living room so you could sit on your sofa in hopes he’d follow you but when you heard the door shut and silence after you knew he’d left.

You tried holding it in, you really did but you were crushed. You’d fallen for his lies again and let him back in, ignoring all the red flags that now appeared so glaringly obvious and you cursed yourself for being so stupid. Letting yourself have an ugly cry into your pillows as you curled into a ball.

It was never meant to end like this. Mason was only ever meant to be someone to have fun with but you’d known from the second you’d seen him he was going to be special to you. Like your souls knew each other already and once they’d found one another he’d set up home in your heart. That’s why you let him treat you how he had, doing whatever it took so you could call him yours even just for a night here and there but you couldn’t let it carry on and hurt yourself like you were right now.

You didn’t hear from him that night, constantly checking your phone through your tears to see if he’d texted you but each time you were met with a blank screen. Feeling more and more hopeless as time went on until you’d exhausted yourself and you fell asleep.

Thankfully the next morning you had nowhere you needed to be and after checking your phone to find nothing from him still, your misery turned to anger. Suddenly wanting to know who this girl was that he couldn’t keep away from as you’d done everything in your power to ignore that part of his life and after some careful digging you managed to find her instagram. Your heart stopping at the first post you clicked on

Robin_xo

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Robin_xo It’s a forever thing 🩷

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You knew it was him from the first picture. The hoodie being the same one he wore last night and as you scrolled to the next picture your heart sank even more. The same trousers and trainers as yesterday too and you didn’t even want to scroll to the last picture but you did.

There he was, head tucked into her neck as they lay in bed together and you felt sick at the sight of them. Only a few hours before these pictures had been taken he’d been with you telling you that you were his one and you felt the rage slowly start to ripple through you. You felt like an idiot and you refused to be part of his little game anymore.

He may not have the guts to leave her but you were stronger than him and you could walk away from this any time.

You picked your phone up again, blocking his number, blocking his social media and even blocking him on the dating app where you’d first met him just in case he was desperate enough to try you there. Making sure he had no way of getting to you if he tried so you could have a clean break and move on even if the prospect of being without him felt hopeless.

Over the next few days you were able to pull yourself together, the first days being rough but you got yourself back into a routine and had started to perk up by the end of the week.

Your heart still hurt though, wanting nothing more than to unblock him from everything and invite him over but you knew as soon as you looked into his eyes, that had had you from the start, then the gaping hole he left would ache even more.

You didn’t want to be around anyone, choosing to spend your Saturday night wrapped up in a blanket as you fed yourself your favourite snacks. Doing everything you could to stop your mind thinking of other things and you hadn’t felt this settled in a while.

The pounding on your door came as a complete shock to you and the force of it made you jump. You knew it was him instantly but you were determined to ignore him until he went away. You’d told him you wouldn’t let him back in if he came back and you’d half been expecting it at some point but not this quickly.

‘Y/n? Babe you in there?’ You suddenly heard, Mason sticking his fingers through the letterbox of your front door so he could shout directly in and the sound of his loud voice frightened you a little bit. ‘Baby please speak to me. I know I’ve fucked it but please let me in’

You heard the letter box snap shut, hoping that he thought you weren’t in and after a few moments you stood up and rounded the corner into your hallway so you could make sure he was gone. But as soon as you got close you saw it open again, jumping to the side and out the way so you could hide just next to the door and out of sight but you knew it was all in vain.

‘I saw your legs, I know you're there’ he called, shutting the post box back up but it wasn’t for long. Watching it open again as he jammed his fingers through as you were frozen in place. ‘If you don’t wanna let me in then fine, but can you at least unblock me so I can call you. I look like a mad man shouting in the street like this’ he told you and you knew he was right.

You knew he was causing a scene and soon enough your neighbours would be wondering what was happening but you weren’t sure if you wanted to hear him out yet. Even just the sound of his voice now was making you feel uneasy but you knew Mason and you knew he’d sit out there until you spoke to him no matter how long it took.

Against your better judgement you unblocked his number and sent him a quick text to let him know he could call you but you only did it so you could tell him to go away and when you saw his picture flash up to show he was calling, you gulped down a nervous lump before hitting accept.

‘Baby please-‘

‘No’ you sniffed, knowing if he explained you’d be right back under his thumb and you were tired of all of it. ‘I'm not listening, I only unblocked you so I could tell you to leave me alone. All I’ve done is think about what you need and I've hurt myself in the process. I’m done talking about this please just go’

‘No I’m not going. I’m sorry but no you have to hear me out’ he countered, hearing him take a seat on your front step as you contemplated if unblocking him was the right choice.

‘I gave you your chance Mason and you blew it. I’m not opening up and letting you back in just for you to run back to her. I poured my heart out to you and you still went back’

‘Baby, please. I’m not going anywhere this time I promise’ he told you his voice pained but when you didn’t answer him you heard the back of his head thud on the door before you heard some shuffling. ‘I mean it, I’m not going anywhere. I’ll sit out here forever if I have to’

‘Mason I’m sorry, you’ve done this too many times I can’t’ you cried, feeling yourself getting overwhelmed at the fact he wouldn’t go and you couldn’t help but let out a few small sobs. ‘You don’t want me’

‘Of course I do-‘

‘No you don’t, you’re just petrified of being alone so you’re latching onto whoever you can’ you wailed. ‘You’re being selfish and I can’t do it anymore’

‘Please don’t cry. Not when I’m stuck out here and can’t do anything to help’ he pleaded, sounding more and more desperate as the moments went on. ‘Tell me what to do. What can I do to fix this? We’re meant to be together baby, can’t you see?’

‘I used to be able to but you’re hurting me Mason. Everything you do fucking hurts’ you sobbed. Trying to make him feel as awful as possible and from the sound of his breathing on the other end it was working. He sounded wrecked but you were ready to stick the knife in a few more times for good measure. ‘Do you know how hard it is to wake up every morning and know you’re waking up next to her, when you should be with me? It fucking sucks Mason, I hate it’

‘I’m sorry baby-‘

‘No you’re not sorry. I’m sick of being second place okay, I’m done’

‘There is no second place, you’re all there is yeah? you’re my one I promise’

You wanted to believe him. To throw the door open and hurl yourself into his arms but you stayed put. He’d done this to you too many times and you didn’t have it in you to watch him walk away from you again so you kept him out no matter how much it was hurting you both. It would be better for you in the long run to end things here and move on.

‘I bared my soul to you Mason and I thought you’d done the same. I thought we were finally getting somewhere but you’ve never wanted me from the start and now I need you to go’

‘Baby please-‘

‘No Mase! Please just go, please!’ you begged him, hoping he’d take the hint before you hung up on him as you couldn’t take listening to him anymore. He’d hurt you more than anyone else had and the sound of him trying to make things right was just hurting you even more.

‘Okay okay, I’m going’ he told you. His voice raw and full of tears and you could hear him standing up outside. ‘I’m going okay but I’m not giving up. I’m not giving up on us baby so just please please dont block me again and I’ll prove to you I’m serious okay? I’m serious about you’

You didn’t reply, fresh out of words to give him and you hoped your silence was enough for him to get the picture but unfortunately for you he still had more to say.

‘I’ll leave you alone okay, I know my word means nothing to you right now but I’ll make this up to you. I’ll text you on Monday and we’ll figure something out, just promise me you won’t block me’

You didn’t want to make him any promises and you were also unsure as to whether you were going to keep him unblocked so you kept silent again. Hoping he’d get the hint you were done talking to him.

‘Okay well… I’m off then. I’ll talk to you soon, okay? Bye baby’ he whispered, waiting a beat to see if you’d reply but when you didn’t he finally hung up.

You didn’t know how he did it, but the urge to throw your door open and go chasing after him was itching just below your skin. You kept yourself rooted to the floor though, waiting for the sound of his car to start and drive away before you picked yourself up off the floor and took yourself back to the sofa.

Where do I go from here? You wondered. Face falling into your hands and you silently wept. You would love to give Mason another chance as you knew deep down in your soul he was your person but even if that was the case it didn’t give him the right to treat you how he had been.

You always prided yourself on sticking to your guns and being firm but when it came to Mason you’d thrown it all out of the window. Doing anything you could to keep him close and you wondered if giving him one more chance would even be worth it.

The rest of the weekend passed you by in a blur. Going to visit your parents on Sunday as you needed some comfort but as soon as you got home the wallowing hole that Mason left in chest started to hurt. He kept to his word and didn’t text you that day but at 8am on the dot on Monday there he was. The sight of his text on your phone making your mouth go dry and you opened it cautiously feeling like as soon as you did he’d pop out from somewhere.

It still hurt hearing from him, but you were glad he wasn’t after a response cause you didn’t have one to give to him right now. Your heart was hurting as you told yourself you wouldn’t let him get anywhere near you again but here he was.

The thought ran across your mind of just blocking him again and being done with it. Hoping he would get the hint and leave you alone but you knew that would never happen. And what if he was telling the truth? Was it really over with her? Was he finally free from whatever spell she had him under and could he one day be fully yours?

Your curiosity eventually got the better of you, pulling up Robins instagram again and you were shocked to find that any trace of Mason was now gone. Even carefully scrolling down the rest of her feed to find the cute pictures of them as teenagers had vanished also and even though you didn’t want to be one of those girls you checked her followers and following to find him missing from both lists.

You knew it was only small but it was something. Something to show he was serious and now all you were left wondering was if he had it in him to put the work in to win you back.

But work in for it he did.

Each day a new text would come through at 8am sharp and whilst for the first few days you were unsure and still a little bit sad, it became part of your routine than you expected. You were still sad about what happened and didn’t know if you had it in you to let Mason back in but he was really trying and with each new text that you left unanswered your resolve was chipping away more and more.

It wasn't just him saying good morning that made your heart defrost a little bit, it was the making sure you had a proper coat and umbrella with you and the cheesy jokes to make you smile. Never once missing a day or sending you one late and over the coming weeks you felt the need to reply grow. Even typing out a few replies sometimes but you chickened out at sending them. Knowing it would open to the floodgates for you to talk and you didn’t know if you were ready yet.

So you kept things one sided for a few weeks, finding yourself anticipating what he might say to you next whilst trying to keep up with where he was. Wanting to watch his stories but not be caught out but in the end you just went for it knowing the amount of people that see meant he’d never realise you did too.

That was until five weeks had passed and you woke up one day to a blank screen. No silly joke, no letting you know what coat you needed or even a simple hello.

You didn’t know what to do or what to think. You were so used to hearing from him now that being woken up to nothing left an unfamiliar feeling in your tummy. Had something happened to him? Or had he simply given up? Tired of trying with you every day to get nothing back and it was in that moment you realised that’s not what you wanted. You knew you were always going to give in eventually no matter how much you told yourself you wouldn’t but now you were unsure as to what to do.

You decided to leave it for a few hours. Giving yourself a deadline of 2pm and if he hadn’t spoken to you by that time then you’d send him a message in hopes he’d reply and as soon as the clock struck two you hit send.

Now you’d replied, the sudden realisation of what you were going to say if he got back to you flashed through your mind. Wondering if you should make him work for it a little bit more but you realised there was no point. It had been over a month since you’d left him sitting on your steps outside and you missed him more and more as each day passed.

The pair of you needed to thrash it out and start fresh rather than let this drag on any longer than needed so you thought about what you wanted to say to him when he replied and when your phone buzzed around half an hour later you picked it up excitedly in hopes he wasn’t mad at you or had given up.

You were filled with giddy excitement, knowing he wasn’t mad at you but his phone was dead and you felt like a huge weight had been lifted as you finally admitted you missed him. You were done with playing games with him and dragging anything out

The rest of the day dragged, antsy to get home and speak to Mason but you’d agreed to have dinner with a colleague and didn’t want to appear rude. Thankfully they had issues with their babysitter so you got away at a reasonable time and were able to hop in the shower and get ready for bed just in time to text Mason and let him know you were ready for him.

He read the message straight away but it took around five minutes for him to actually call you. Your heart in your throat as his picture came up and with shaky hands you clicked accept and readied yourself to talk to him.

‘Hello?’

‘Hey’ he answered, a sigh of relief pouring from him and he spoke and the butterflies swarmed in your tummy as you listened to the sound of his voice in what felt like the first time in forever. ‘You alright?’

‘Yeah, I’m fine. You?’

‘Yeah I’m good’ he told you softly, closing your eyes as a wave of emotion rippled over you. ‘I’ve missed your voice’

You couldn’t stop the quiet sob that fell from your lips at his confession. You missed his voice too but you didn’t want to admit it to him right now.

‘Please don’t get upset’ he whispered. Concern filling his voice as he listened to you struggling to hold it together. ‘Please baby, cause I might do something drastic’ he joked, feeling the laughter bubble up and out of you before you could stop it and it’s like you could feel him smiling down the phone.

‘Oh yeah? Like what?’

‘Whatever you want, I’ll do it’ he told you seriously. ‘I mean it, whatever you want from me to make you happy, I’ll do it’

‘I asked you to leave me alone, you didn’t do that’

‘Cause I know we’d both be miserable in the long run’ he told you pointedly and you had to reluctantly agree. You had been miserable for so long but this felt like a bit of a turning point.

You kept the conversation light, letting each other know what you’d been up to lately and you could feel yourself slipping back into the same headspace as when you first met. Hanging on his every word as he made you laugh and the itch to see him was slowly growing.

‘This feels a bit like old times huh?’ You smiled. ‘You know, like the first night we matched? we’ve come full circle a bit’

‘I still remember that call’ he whispered ‘I knew I was fucked as soon as I heard your voice’ he laughed, hearing him moving around so he could get comfortable and it made you miss him even more. You wanted to get comfortable in his arms so he could hold you together. ‘Do you think I can see you soon?’

‘I think so, yeah’ you told him quietly, Mason giving no response to you but you could feel his smile down the phone. ‘Mason?’

‘Yes baby’ he answered, your tummy flipping at the sound of the pet name again. He’d called it a million times before but this felt different. It felt real.

‘Is it really over with her’

‘I promise, it’s done’ he told you sincerely and you believed him straight away. ‘Whatever you need for me to prove it to you I will okay’

‘I don’t want you to think I don’t trust you-‘

‘No it’s not that, but I've messed up and I need to prove myself. I’ve not given you anything to trust but I can change that and I will’ he told you pointedly.

‘What happened, Mase? Why did you go?’ You asked tearily before hearing him let out a sigh.

‘When I came here that night, I was serious about ending things. But she’s all I’ve ever really known so when she asked if I could come back and see her I only went because I'm weak. I don’t really have an excuse I just panicked but I knew I’d messed up straight away and then I saw she put that fucking post up. I told her to take it down and I tried to text you but they weren’t delivering and when I called you it was going straight to voicemail. I even tried messaging you on the bloody app but you weren’t coming up so I logged out and then when I searched again you came up’ he sighed. ‘I knew then I’d lost you so I really tried with her for a few days but you’re always on my mind. It's like I’d look at her but I’d just be wishing I was looking at you, pretending you were next to me and no matter what I did that never went away. I don’t feel for her what I feel for you, don’t think I ever have really and I knew I had to break the cycle with her. We loved each other but we just didn’t like each other anymore’

‘How do you know that won't happen to us?’ you asked quietly. Not sure you could ever not like Mason even after everything but if it could happen to him and his childhood sweetheart then what chance did you have?

‘I can’t make you any promises baby, but I just have this feeling you know? Me and her hurting each other was a routine, when we weren’t shouting at each other then it didn’t feel right. It’s almost like we took pleasure in making the other miserable but knowing I’d hurt you, that absolutely broke me’ he told you. His voice wobbling at the end as his emotions got the better of him and that was all it took for you to get upset yourself. Small sobs that you’d tried to keep at bay now battling their way to their surface and you knew Mason heard them straight away.

‘Please don’t cry love’ he whispered and you could hear him sitting up in bed like he was trying to hear you better.

‘Sorry-‘

‘No no don’t be sorry’ he interrupted, his voice full of sorrow. ‘I just hate that I can’t do anything’

‘It’s fine, I’ll be alright’ you told him but clearly you weren’t convincing enough as you heard him get out of bed on the other end.

‘No I’m sorry, I can’t. I’m coming over okay?’

‘You don’t have to, I’ll be fine in a minute’

‘No I do. If you don’t want me to come then I won’t but I can’t be so far away knowing you’re upset’

You didn’t want him being far away anymore either and the prospect of being close to him for a little bit sounding more enticing by the second and before you knew it your mouth was running away with you.

‘There’s a spare key under the plant pot’

‘I’ll be ten minutes okay? Just stay where you are’ he told you and you could hear him rustling around on the other end.

‘Okay’ You choked and after a quick goodbye he was gone.

You tried to calm yourself down a bit. Sitting yourself up in bed to try and stop the tears but no matter what they kept flowing and the anticipation of seeing Mason was making you feel sick.

You heard your front door open, gathering yourself together so you could try and calm down some more. Switching the lamp on beside you but as soon as he burst through the door you felt yourself breaking down again.

He was rushing over to you in an instant and you let him hold you to his chest. Tucking your face in his neck as his scent overtook you and you felt yourself melting into his embrace.

‘Shhhhh it’s okay. It’s okay baby I’m here now. I've got you yeah?’ He whispered. Rocking you back and forth to soothe you but all you could do was cry your little broken heart out once more. Gripping his hoodie with your fists like he might disappear but he was there and he was real. His fingers slowly rubbing over your scalp as he tried to calm you down but all you could feel was his own breathing becoming more ragged as he got emotional himself.

The pair of you couldn’t seem to separate, holding each other as tightly as you could as you cried out all of your pain. Him rubbing your back gently to try and soothe you but it was his comforting smell that relaxed you more than anything. Letting it engulf you as you squeezed him tighter before pulling back to look at him.

‘Please don’t cry anymore beautiful’ he whispered, gently wiping the last few tears from under your eyes and you gently reached out to wipe the tears away from his own face. The need to have him tell you face to face it was finally over being the only thing on your mind as you knew you’d be able to read him so without a second thought you cupped his face and smiled as he rested his cheek in your palm.

‘Is it really done?’

‘It’s done baby’ he nodded, and you knew he was being honest. ‘Last time I was here, when I sat outside, as soon as I left I went and got my stuff and I haven’t seen or spoken to her since’

‘Really?’

‘I promise. And you know what? I feel so relieved. Like huge weights off my shoulders cause I know it’s really done and it’s over’ he told you, unable to stop himself pressing a soft kiss to your forehead and you shivered at his touch before wrapping your arms around him again.

‘Look at me’ he whispered, pulling back so the pair of you could look at each other and even though he looked the saddest you’d ever seen him his eyes looked less troubled and you felt your heart settle. ‘Even if you really are done with me and this is it, then I just want you to know I’ll always be grateful for you, you know? Things have been different with you from the start in the best way possible and I can’t even begin to describe it. I just feel drawn to you, we’re like magnets. Like maybe it sounds stupid but it’s like our souls are connected. I know you said it was a cult but you’re my twin flame baby’ he laughed, making you roll your eyes at his attempt at a joke but your smile mirrored his before he got serious again.

‘You made me see how unhealthy everything was and I’ve never felt more complete than when I’m with you. You make me feel safe and you feel like home. Like when I’m with you my mind finally switches off and I know everything’s alright. Meeting you changed everything for me but I get that I may have pushed you too far’

‘I’m not done with you’ you told him. Watching his face relax as your words sunk in. Knowing you felt the exact same as him and that’s why you’d been holding on to him for so long. ‘I really almost was but I can’t keep away’

‘I’ll make things right i promise’ he breathed, his voice strained as he tried to hold himself together and even though he was clearly emotional you were ready to set down some ground rules.

‘If we do this, we do it my way alright?’

‘I’ll do whatever you want, i promise you’

‘I need time okay. I’m not saying we have to keep apart like we have been but I’d like for us to take it slow and make sure this is really what we want. I can’t get hurt like this again Mase’

‘I know, and I never would again, yeah? But we can go at whatever pace you like’ he told you and you couldn’t stop the smile taking over your face at his words. You knew he was being serious and the way he started smiling because you were made your heart thump, letting him pull you in closer as he cupped your jaw. ‘I missed you so much’ he whispered, kissing your head gently. ‘But I also missed who I was when I’m around you. You bring out the best parts of me. You make me want to be better, to do better, I want to be good for you, you know?. I couldn't have done it without you, I didn’t even want to do it for myself but I- I care about you so much’ he confessed.

You couldn’t speak, his sweet words rendering you speechless so you did the only thing you could think of to show him you felt the same. Leaning forward to softly capture his lips and you could tell he was shocked. Freezing ever so slightly before he melted into you and kissed you back.

You’d missed his kisses more than anything, the way just a simple touch of his lips on yours had the power to relax you like they did and you wanted to feel even closer to him than you currently were so you wrapped your arms around his shoulders and let him pull you further into his body.

Neither of you tried to take anything further, content with just feeling each other after what felt like too long apart and even when you tried to pull away he chased your lips so he could kiss you again before you couldn’t stop smiling. Foreheads resting against each others so you could still be close and it was only when he bumped his nose against yours gently that you found the courage to look at him.

‘That was unexpected’ he smiled, making you laugh out of embarrassment a little bit but he kissed your cheeks to let you know it was fine.

‘What happens now, Mase?’

‘What do you want to happen?’

‘A fresh start?’ You smiled, causing him to nod at you shyly. ‘I don’t wanna hold onto any anger or use anything against each other or anything like that. I just want us to be together and be happy. Just the two of us’

‘I want that too, more than anything’ he confirmed. ‘like I never wanna make you sad ever again, it kills me knowing how I’ve made you feel. I really would do anything to make this work, baby. I wanna grow with you and laugh with you and make you happy, yeah? Never wanna see you cry again’

‘I don’t think I’ve got anymore tears left’ you laughed, pulling him back into a hug and your heart fluttered at the way he clung to you. Stroking your back as he hid in your neck and you relished in the comfortable silence.

‘She knows about you’ he told you suddenly. His voice was so quiet you almost didn’t hear him but when you pulled back he must have sensed your uneasiness and carried on to reassure you. ‘Not everything, like she doesn’t know who you are but when I told her I wasn’t coming back this time she asked if there was someone else. She’d had her suspicions for a while but I just told her I’ve got a very good friend who I don't wanna just be friends with anymore. And that I love her enough to give her everything she wants and not keep hurting her because we can’t figure our shit out’

‘Love?’ You breathed. Wondering if the word had slipped out by accident but he nodded his head to let you know that’s what he meant to say.

‘Don’t worry, you don’t have to say it. It just needed you to know’ he told you softly. Thumb stroking your cheek as he gazed down at you adoringly. ‘You still give me butterflies, you know that? just like you did the first time I saw you. They’ve never gone away and I don’t think they ever will’

‘Oh Mase’ you whispered. So overwhelmed by everything he’d told you tonight you didn’t know where to start. You just wanted to hold him and kiss him and let him know you were going to be okay so you did just that. Kissing him softly before you pulled each other into your arms.

It felt like a dream, sitting there quietly and content with him as you just held each other together. Focusing on each other's breathing as you melted even closer together and you wished you could stay like this in his arms forever.

‘I’ll head off soon, yeah?’ He whispered into your hair, hands stroking your back lightly but you pulled away with a pout before he tucked some hair behind your ear. Smiling softly at you as you looked at him in disappointment.

‘Do you have to?’

‘I thought you wanted to take it slow?’

‘I do, but not tonight’ you huffed. ‘I need you here tonight’

‘Oh yeah? Need me here to do what?’ He asked, his voice getting a little more cheeky but he knew you didn’t mean it like that.

‘Hold me’ you whispered, watching his face soften before pressing another kiss to your cheek.

‘Come on, I’ve got you’ he whispered, the pair of you getting comfortable under the covers and you shivered as his thumbs stroked over your waist lightly. ‘You know, I wished I would of known there was a key under the plant pot when I was sat outside freezing my balls off a few weeks ago’

‘Trust me you wouldn’t have wanted to see me then’ you chuckled. ‘I was ready to tear you a new one’

‘I would have taken it’ he smiled, pulling you into his body a little further. ‘But I think it was better I gave you some space for a little while’

‘What about the constant texts?’

‘Don’t lie, you loved them. I know you were waiting everyday to see what I had to say next’

‘The animal facts were my favourite’

‘Oh yeah? Well I’ve got a load saved up for you’ he told you. The pair of you giggling like school kids but the wide eyed look on his face made your tummy flutter and when he lent down to kiss your cheek softly you could feel the blush spreading over them. ‘I know you wanna take things slow but I’m so excited to do all our firsts together again’ he told you softly, and you looked up at him with a confused expression.

‘What do you mean?’

‘You know like, tomorrow will be the first morning I get to wake up next to you and not feel weird about it. And I’m gonna take you out on a first date, a real one and I'll take you wherever you want. And then you can come stay with me for the first time and I’ll show you off to my family when you’re ready’ he told you excitedly. ‘Does that all sound okay?’

‘That sounds perfect’ you laughed, loving how excited he seemed knowing he’d get to do all these things with you again

‘As much as I’d love to stay up all night yapping with you, you need some sleep baby’

‘You’ll be here when I wake up, won’t you?’

‘Of course I will’ he reassured you and after a quick kiss good night you got settled on his chest.

‘Hey, Mase?’ You whispered after a few minutes, knowing you should trying to sleep but there was something you wanted to tell him before you did.

‘Yeah?’

‘I’ve deleted that app’ you told him. Feeling his chest rumble under you as he laughed before placing a soft kiss to your hairline.

‘Me too’ he whispered. ‘Does this mean you’re not single now?’

‘Almost’

‘I can work with that’ he told you quietly, kissing your forehead softly as you snuggled yourself into his chest even more.

Were things perfect? No

Were they salvageable? Yes

If you would have asked yourself that question a few weeks ago then you might have had a very different answer but laying in Mason's arms right now and the promise of a fresh start when you woke up in the morning being only hours away made you realised that he would always be worth it. That you hadn’t just chosen him but the universe had picked you for each other and whilst life was never simple, you knew you’d never be lonely again.

Thank you so so much for taking the time to read this 🩷 I’d love it if you could send me some feedback to let me know what you think 😘

[tomsparkyr]

I don't know if you take request but could you do a blurb of what you think dating Milo Manheim would be like? Like being with him on set, in interviews, red carpet, on a date and then just home alone? If not that's fine and I respect that.

hi yes i do! so this is going to be headcanons or cute little moments because I love this idea and I did it once before.

MEMORIES

milo manheim x fem!reader

you and milo sat on the couch in your apartment as you rested on his chest. he held his phone as he scrolled through tiktok and you did the same until you had an idea.

"i just had an amazing idea" you told him and he turned his phone off as he looked down at you and smiled.

"whats your idea?" he asked indulging in it as he always does. he thinks that you're the most amazing person in the world and would do anything for you if you asked

"what if i search our names on youtube together to see what comes up?" you asked and he laughed and kissed your forehead with a smile

"do it" he said and you went onto youtube as you searched it and the first thing that came up was "y/n y/l/n and milo manheim making me believe in love for 10:46" you looked up at him and he smiled

"that one, lets watch that one" he said and he clicked on the video as you began to watch it with him. the videos were split in sections but here are some of them

you were on the set of school spirits with milo and you stood off on the side watching him with a smile on your face. it was clear that you were in love and he looked at you and winked making you laugh and everyone else too.

the one after that was one of you and him in the kitchen together. you were making mac-and-cheese as you stirred the noodles and he walked up behind you. he wrapped his arms around you as the right side of my neck by Faye webster played in the background and you smiled. you swayed in his arms and he did the same thing.

another one had one of you talking with peyton and the girls of school spirits and peyton was recording you and milo as he stared at you. he ran over and lifted you

"MILO" you cried out as he spun you around and they all laughed and shook their heads at the sight of you two being with each other.

the forth one was one of you and milo in an interview together and his hand held yours as you played "which school spirits character are you?"

"so milo what is your favorite thing about y/n?" they asked as you continued to answer the questions.

"i cant answer that, theres no real answer. my favorite thing about her is her. shes so perfect and I just think that shes one of the most amazing women in the world , next to my mom" he said and you laughed

"that was really sweet, and YES! WE LOVE YOU MAMA MANHEIM" you yelled and he laughed

"we love you mama" he called out as he leaned in and kissed your forehead laughing with you.

the fifth one was one of you and him on the red-carpet together. he spun you around with a laugh and you laughed too as you spun him and they all got pictures of it, you two were quite the couple and they ate it up.

"you do look beautiful by the way" he said into your ear and you looked up at him with a smile

"thank you, you do too" you told him and he laughed as he shoved your shoulder and shook his head.

once the video was over, the ending said "honestly they make me believe in love again, I thought it was dead but they proved its not. if they ever break up, bury me with their relationship" you laughed.

"i didnt realize how much of our relationship got documented" you stated and he laughed

"lots of memories" he exclaimed

"loads, im ready for more though" you told him and he leaned down and kissed you with a smile on his face

"i am too" he told you

but at least you had the memories

A/N: ITS COLOR-CODED FOR THE SEPERATION OF THE MEMORIES.

[tomsparkyr]

steve harrington fic recs! (part 1)

long fics for @keerysfolklore

cross my heart (and hope to die) by @talesofesther 8.9k words, so so well written omg

i couldn't be more in love by @ch3rrytales 7.8k words, my heart clenched this made me so soft

i'll put us back together at heart by @sanguineterrain 8.8k words, i reread this so so so often i can almost dictate it word to word

the wrong side of the tracks by @schoopsahoy 18.8k words, another absolute banger i looked for it everywhere before refinding it last month but ugh i love love love <3

snow angels by @maroon-cardigan 11.6k words, i was so so intrigued by the reader and this made me soooo soft throughout!!

within these walls by @sparklingsin 7.5k words, sooooo spooky and soft i loved it so much

superfreaky by @sattlersquarry 7.3k words, can u tell i loooove halloween fics? can u blame me though with libby dropping masterpieces like this??

of books and beasts by @violettaskies 9.1k words, so so good i looove a slowburn moment, its also very spicy hhh

sweet as death by @strangerstilinski 10k words, very very spicy, spooky fic inspired by jennifer's body it's a very good read!

a little less conversation, a little more action, please by @hungharrington 8k words, soft spicy treat i looove it<3

i knew you by @radiosteve 30.5k words, and it's worth every word!! enemies to something to lovers it's just so good

the only tally mark by @the-case-book-of-fanfiction 7.2k words, their writing is so SO good, check out their other works too (honorable mention to bob seger)

wake up slow by @carolmunson 7.4k words, so cozy so warm so comforting ft. barista!steve augh i looove

do you think i have forgotten by @headkiss 14.1k words, idiots in love, need i say more? it's just perfect

orange juice by @sattlersquarry 8k words, it is so so so so good, gut wrenching angst with a happy ending. i love &lt;3

nine facts, one lie by @stevebabey 16.5k words, obsessed with this i can't stress this enough, the enemies(but one sided) to lovers pipeline is sooo well done

become the sun by @headkiss 14.5k words, sunshiney vacation steve, SO cozy i love the vibes of this one so much ugh&lt;3 i recommend literally everything by them their writing is SO SO GOOD

in your dreams, wherever they be by @sweatervest-obsessed 2 parter with a total of 22k words, SO SO GOOD never ever getting over this. EVER

hearts on the telephone line by @t-lostinworlds 8k words, so so soft fluffy, my heart melted every 2 seconds

itty bitty titty by @t-lostinworlds 19.7k words, SO SO GOOD, justice for all titties!! so soft, lil angst but mostly steve being a good bf and soft spice<3 also honorable mention to competitively stupid (SO GOOD) and you are my sunshine (nobody touch me)

i can see you by @fairyysoup 17.6k words, this is my absolute favourite favourite ever i've reread this so many times i've lost count. the best best thing i've ever ever read i can't stress this enough i could write paragraphs abt this one

def gonna do a part 2 of long fics then maybe a list of shorter fics that i adore and series too, of steve harrington, peter parker and tom holland when i can<3 these are only a few of countless incredible fics i've read i can not wait to do more<3

[tomsparkyr]

Painting the town blue 💙🖌️

[tomsparkyr]

Something In The Way You Move

Author’s note: I hope you enjoy reading my first ever one-shot. I got the idea for this after listening to the Ellie Goulding song with the same title. I’m not exactly sure how I would categorise this fanfic, but that’s alright. This is only for fictional purposes only, and please don’t copy my work without my permission. Enjoy 🤎

Warnings: bad language, toxic relationship, flirty men at the bar, mentions of bruises, cheating, implied smut, fluff, angst, relationship issues, minors DNI (let me know if I missed anything)

famous!Reader x Jude Bellingham Word count: 8k words

///

‘“Y/N Y/L/N is the most famous woman in football.”’ Winnie dramatically turns towards you, eyes comically wide, her grip firm on the copy of the British Vogue magazine in her grasp. ‘Bestie, did you hear that? According to this article, you’re the most famous woman in football.’

You chuckle. ‘Yeah, apparently I am.’

‘How are you so calm right now?’

You’re anything but calm, you’ve just mastered the art of concealing your emotions—it’s a skill you developed shortly after meeting Jude. ‘I don’t know. I guess it’s the shock, it still hasn’t sunk in yet.’ 

‘It’s definitely the shock, not that I blame you,’ her eyes flit back to the article. ‘This is insane.’

‘In a good way, I hope.’ 

‘Very good way.’ You watch as she takes in the words of the article. ‘Girl, you’re in Vogue. Like, on the cover! They, like, wrote a whole article about you.’

‘God, sometimes I forget how dramatic you can be, Wins.’ 

Her theatrics are what first drew you to her. Never in your life had you come across someone like Winnie, and now you consider her one of your best friends. The two of you met at a fashion show a year ago, and well, the rest is history. . . 

‘Dramatic? How is this dramatic? This is a big deal, Y/N,’ she shuts the magazine, using her fingers as a makeshift bookmark to save her spot, then sits it on her lap. ‘When you told me you were doing a shoot for Vogue, I didn’t think you meant a cover shoot. Why didn’t you tell me?’ 

Because the whole thing was surreal, ‘cause I didn’t actually think they’d put me on the cover, the thoughts go through your mind.

‘I guess it slipped my mind,’ you state nonchalantly because that sounds better than the self-deprecating thoughts. 

Your cool exterior makes you seem indifferent about the whole thing, but you truly are flattered and overwhelmed. Never in a million years did you think you’d be on the cover of Vogue, and yet here you are. 

‘“I guess it slipped my mind,”’ she mocks with a hearty laugh. ‘Seriously though, I’m so proud of you. And if we weren’t sitting in this car right now, I’d give you the biggest hug.’ 

‘Thank you, Wins, and I know you would.’

You’re in the back of a black Mercedes Sprinter, there is a Netflix crew with their cameras filming you, and you’re being driven to Wembley Stadium where you will watch your boyfriend’s team play a Champions League final. 

The cameras are there because you’re in the midst of shooting an episode for season one of your yet to be named Netflix reality show. It’s been a month of filming scenes with the crew, but you still feel self-conscious having such intimate conversations with cameras present.

Who’s idea was it to give you a Netflix show anyway?

‘Shall I read it to you, then?’

‘Uh, no. No no no.’  

‘Oh, come on. Why not?’

You squirm in your seat and feel your face heat up, ‘Uh, I don’t know, ‘cause it’s awkward.’

It was a hundred percent your idea to stop at the shops to have yourself filmed buying the magazine, you know, for content for the show, but now it feels so silly, almost like you were bragging or something. To have Winnie read the article to you will only make the embarrassed feeling worse. 

‘Why is it awkward?’

You discreetly point a finger towards the camera. 

‘The cameras?’

‘Shh!’ you want the seats to part and swallow you up. ‘What’s wrong with you?’

‘But this will make great content for the show.’

‘Oh god.’

Winnie laughs hard, she’s clearly entertained by all that is happening. ‘Are you shy?’

‘You know this about me.’ 

She laughs harder. 

‘I’m glad you’re enjoying this.’ 

Not to be that person, but Winnie doesn’t get it. You can almost predict how the internet at large will react to the footage, should Netflix decide to use it for the show. It’s not beneath the world, namely those wretched online gossip rags, to paint you as some self-involved individual who makes her friends read magazine articles that praise her successes. 

Hell, just this morning you made the mistake of reading the comments of a MailOnline article about your recent night out in Madrid. You had been out for dinner with your manager and his wife, and it was your standard MailOnline article—though they were uncharacteristically nice to you—nothing out of the ordinary, so you felt it was safe to venture into the comments. 

Big mistake, and it’s safe to say that in future, you’ll steer clear of the comments section of anything. 

‘Last chance, are you sure you don’t want me to read it?’

‘I’m begging you not to.’

‘Very well,’ she lifts the magazine back up from her lap, her finger bookmark helping her open to the exact page of the article. ‘I’ll just read it for myself.’

‘Let me know if it’s any good.’

She scoffs, ‘Whatever.’ 

With a wry wink, you blindly reach for your phone that’s seated comfortably on your lap and open the Instagram app to update your story. The hope is that this will distract you from your fretful thoughts. 

Again, on the exterior, you’re as cool as a cucumber, but inside, you’re tightly wound. It sounds like an exaggeration, but so much is counting on Real Madrid winning tonight’s match, so you’re praying for their triumph. 

Will it fix the many issues that riddle your life? No, but a win could mean a less tense Jude, and it could take him out of the foetid mood he’s been in lately.

To be fair, the moodiness is not only exclusive to Jude, but you know.  

‘Gosh, I really hope they win tonight.’

The words slip out your mouth before you can stop them.

‘Huh?’

‘Real Madrid,’ you turn to Winnie, who’s engrossed in the words on the page, ‘I really hope they win tonight.’

She looks up from the magazine, and with a kind smile assures you, ‘Don’t worry, they will.’

She’s so optimistic, so sure, and that’s the attitude you will carry with you through this final.

///

It wasn’t easy, but in the end they came together as a team, and Real Madrid won the Champions League. 

The hours that followed the victory were nothing short of chaotic. First there was the team’s celebration on the field, where they received their trophy and medals. Of all the events of the day,  that’s the bit you hated the most. So much was happening all at once, which overwhelmed you and made you unpleasant, and of course, that led to an argument between you and Jude. 

///

A couple hours earlier. 

‘What the actual fuck is wrong with you?’

And more importantly, what the fuck is wrong with you for still putting up with Jude’s shit? You don’t even know how it got to this point. One minute you were teasing each other and making light conversation on the bed of your hotel suite, and the next you were bickering. But that’s how it is with you and Jude lately, there’s no middle ground. 

‘What the fuck is wrong with me?’ he challenges. 

‘Yeah, did I stutter? What the fuck is wrong with you?’ you press, refusing to back down. Usually, he can intimidate you into submission with a harsh look and tone, but not tonight. ‘Seriously, Jude, you’re not even fun to be around anymore.’ 

‘That’s rich coming from you,’ he spits back. 

‘And what’s that supposed to mean?’

‘As if you don’t know.’

‘I wouldn’t be asking you if I did, would I?’ 

The fucking prick, and if it were any other day, you’d tell him that he’s a prick, but that would only prolong the fight, and you both still have to get ready for dinner in an hour. 

‘Why are we even having this argument?’

‘You tell me, you started it,’ he throws the accusation so carelessly. 

���How is any of this my fault?’

‘You’re so childish all the time,’ he answers without faltering, ‘always acting up in front of a crowd.’

‘You bastard!’

‘Then when I call you out for it, you start hurling insults at me,’ he finishes, a smug expression on his face. 

You hate it when he gets this way, so vindictive and purposeful in his aim to hurt you. ‘You’re such a fucking prick!’

‘Case in point. . .’ 

And you think you might cry, but you refuse to give him the satisfaction of seeing you teary over him. 

‘That’s it, I don’t want to go anywhere with you tonight,’ you announce after a stretched silence. 

‘Like hell you’re not.’

Your eyebrows come together in a frown so deep, it’s sure to leave lines in its wake. ‘You can’t force me to go with you.’

‘Stop it.’

‘Stop what?’

‘Stop being childish.’

‘How am I being childish?’ With an incredulous scoff, you tell him, ‘You know, there’s something seriously wrong with you. I think that you need to get your head checked.’ 

‘What?’

‘You’re. Insane. There’s something wrong with you, in your head.’ There’s nothing normal about his recent behaviour. ‘If you think I’m going out with you tonight after you’ve disrespected me, you’ve got something–’

‘We’re not doing this shit.’

‘“This shit”? What does that even mean?’

‘I’m not doing this shit with you. What’s this even about?’

‘It’s about you not respecting me.’

‘That’s bullshit, and you know it’s bullshit,’ he responds dismissively. ‘What have I said or done to disrespect you? I only asked why you were frowning on the field.’

‘And I told you that I wasn’t.’

‘You forget that you’re a bad liar.’

‘I am not lying!’ 

‘Keep your fucking voice down!’ he yells right back at you, and his voice is like a whip. 

That’s when the tears spring to your eyes. You know you said you wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing you cry, but it’s all too much. 

‘Oh, don’t cry.’

‘How can I not when you’re being so cruel?’

Jude’s livid now, nostrils flaring livid. You should shut up, but you can’t stop the words from spilling out of your mouth. It’s like a tap that won’t shut. 

‘And, it’s like,’ sniff, sniff ‘like you enjoy seeing me upset. And I just feel like everything I do sets you off lately, and I don’t know what to do anymore.’ 

The tears are freely falling now, and you don’t bother to wipe them away. You want him to feel guilty for the way he spoke to you. 

‘Why do you hate me so much?’

‘Baby, I don’t hate you. How could you even ask that?’

When he reaches out to take your hand, you move it away from him. ‘Don’t.’

‘I’m trying to bridge the gap. I’m trying to comfort you.’

‘I don’t need your comfort,’ you sound so sad, and maybe that’s because you are really sad. 

You can’t believe the current state of your relationship, and you can’t, for the life of you, understand how it got to this point. You and Jude loved each other, you still love each other. . . Well, you still love him, you’re not so sure of his feelings. 

‘And can we drop this, please? I promise I’m not trying to get out of talking about it, but’ sniff ‘just for now, until after dinner.’

/// 

So you both agreed to a temporary truce, but things are still awkward between you. For example, the ride to the restaurant was silent, Jude barely acknowledged you at dinner, and now he’s somewhere in the restaurant socialising, and you’ve been left to your own devices. 

It’s not all bad though, because you’re not completely alone, you have the other WAGs to keep you company. 

‘How’s your cocktail?’

You wish Winnie had come though, she would make it better, more bearable. You tried to beg and bribe, desperate for her to meet you here, but she’s stubborn and she wasn’t in the mood. ‘A night wasted with cunty football WAGs? I don’t think so.’ Her words, not yours. 

‘Good. It’s a bit too sweet for my liking though.’

‘Same,’ Coralie chuckles. 

You’re jonesing for something stronger, a shot of something, but you’re already tipsy after opting out of dinner—your excuse was that you weren’t feeling well—so rather you stick to the sugary beverage. 

The group of you are at some swanky restaurant in Mayfair, and you’re doing your best to be sociable, but it’s hard to do when all you want to do is burst out crying. 

‘How do you plan on celebrating tonight?’

You shrug your shoulders, ‘I thought this was the celebration.’

‘With the team, yes, but how do you plan to celebrate with Jude?’

‘He has to be up early tomorrow morning.’ 

Coralie rolls her eyes.

‘You don’t like that answer?’

‘It’s boring, is all.’ 

And because you don’t know how to respond to that, you take a sip of your cocktail. 

‘You look tired,’ she continues.

You guess she just wants to fill the silence?

More like over it. It turns out, you’re not so great at concealing your emotions. ‘Exhausted. It’s been a long day.’

‘Filming a reality show is exhausting, huh?’ Coralie chaffs. She leans in towards you, probably to prevent someone from eavesdropping on your conversation. ‘I need all the details.’

Coralie’s sudden shift in topic catches you off guard. This whole exchange is not really going the way you want it to go, but you’re playing along because you really don’t want to sit alone. 

‘Uh, the details?’

‘All of it.’ 

Unlike everyone else at this table, Coralie isn’t a WAG. She’s employed by the team, and her job’s to be sort of an assistant to the players. When you moved to Spain at the start of the season, Coralie was actually one of the first people you were introduced to, and she was instrumental in helping you and Jude find your apartment. 

 ‘Where to start?’ When you draw a blank, you inquire, ‘What do you want to know?’

‘Hm, how did the opportunity come about?’ she turns in her seat so she’s fully facing you now. ‘How long have you been filming? What is the show about? I want to know it all.’ 

The reality show is the last thing you want to be talking about, but fuck it. You’ve been internally spiralling all night thinking about your fight with Jude, and this will give you something else to focus on for a bit. Without giving too much away, you skim over your agreement with the streaming platform, how they approached you with the offer, and the basic premise of the show. 

‘And it’s not weird for you to have the cameras following you around?’

‘I mean’ you finish the remainder of your cocktail and place the glass back onto the table ‘it’s not like we’re filming every day. There’s, like, a schedule.’

‘And how does that work?’

You do your best to explain the schedule and how it’s set up, but you’re past the point of tipsy, slightly over it, and quite frankly, you want the conversation to be over. 

Truth be told, you still can’t believe that someone at Netflix looked at you and your life and thought you were interesting enough to give a reality show to. Not that you’re complaining, the exposure and paycheque totally make it worth it. 

‘And how does Jude feel about it?’

Coralie’s question comes as no surprise. She’s got this little crush on Jude, but it’s harmless, endearing even. 

‘I don’t know.’

‘He doesn’t talk about it?’

‘I mean, we have talked about it, just not in great detail.’ You can hear the defensiveness in your tone. ‘We don’t talk much about work.’

‘But this affects him,’ she presses on, clearly not satisfied with your response. ‘Or will he not be on the show?’ 

‘He will be.’

You’re not entirely sure where she’s going with these questions.

‘He just doesn’t have an opinion on it?’

‘Well, I don’t know. Maybe you should ask him.’

Of course this is a lie. After your manager had reached out to you about the offer, Jude was the first person you called because you value his opinion. 

You weren’t sure you could commit to filming six episodes for the season, and you felt like having the crew and cameras around would feel like an invasion of your personal space. 

Jude felt differently and was encouraging.

‘This could be good for your career,’ he had advised. 

He’s even filmed some scenes for the show. 

‘So you’re like Kim Kardashian now,’ Coralie teases. 

‘Jude said the same thing,’ you smile at the memory. 

‘Well, I’ve got an idea for the finale.’

You cock your head to one side, ‘You do?’ 

She nods, a wide smile taking over her beautiful face, ‘I do. Picture this: you’re on vacation, I’ll let you pick the location, and Jude proposes to you.’ 

Oh you’re not drunk enough for this. And the crazy part is that she seems so delighted with herself—proud even. 

‘What do you think?’

‘No.’ 

‘What? Why?’ 

‘No, absolutely not.’ You feel yourself getting worked up. You’re so moody these days, and it’s not hormonal.

‘At least think about it.’

‘Coralie, no.’ 

‘Okay, okay.’ And you think she might drop it, but she continues to ask, ‘Which part don’t you like?’

All of it. In fact, you don’t want to be having this conversation anymore. But you don’t want to be impolite, so you force a smile as you tell her, ‘Right now, marriage isn’t on the cards for us.’

With her hands held up defensively, Coralie clarifies, ‘It was just a suggestion.’

‘And I appreciate it.’ 

Well, this is a shitfest. Winnie, Winnie, Winnie, you think, I should’ve pushed harder. 

There’s no use in dwelling on the fact, and there’s no use in staying at this table. But if you leave abruptly, Coralie might take it the wrong way. 

‘I need a refill, want to come?’

She points to her still full cocktail glass, ‘I’m still good.’

‘Okie-dokie,’ you raise off of your chair. ‘I’ll see you in a bit.’

Coralie’s smile doesn’t reach her eyes, it seems the annoyance is mutual. You just wish the night was over and you were back at the suite. Part of you wishes you’d bump into Jude, not because you have anything to say to him, but you sort of miss his face. 

‘Get a grip,’ you mumble to yourself as you manoeuvre through the tables. 

You’re miserable, more than usual, and it’s affecting the way you’re interacting with people. Already Coralie thinks you’re a bitch. She didn’t say anything to you, but she didn’t have to, it was written all over her face. And on a different day, the guilt would gnaw at you, but tonight you can’t bring yourself to care. 

‘A vodka tonic, please.’

At least your manners are still intact. 

‘More vodka than tonic.’ 

So you’ll drink in hopes that it will help the time pass quicker, and maybe if he sees your tragic state, Jude might let you go back to the hotel. After tearing into you, of course. 

As if the sadistic fuck would let me leave. 

Knowing Jude, he’d force you to stay but he’d be pissed at the fact that you weren’t on your best behaviour. 

The last time, he called you ‘inconsiderate’. And maybe it’s true, maybe you are ‘inconsiderate’, but he’s no better. Hell, he’s worse, but you can never tell him that. In his heart and in his mind, he is a saint—you just bring out the worst in him. 

‘Thanks.’ 

The tumbler is cold in your hand as you raise it to take the first sip. You wince at the bitter taste of vodka, but it’s just what you need, and you feel some of the tension leave your body. You think you might stay here a while. 

It’s peaceful at the bar. There’s no Coralie and her unsolicited suggestions, there’s no sulking Jude. . . though you’d much rather have him sulking at you than the cold shoulder, at least then he’s showing some emotion. 

‘Penny for your thoughts?’

But then there are the men who think it’s okay to approach you. 

‘I’m John, by the way.’ 

John flashes you a bright smile, and you can’t help but notice his super white and super perfect set of teeth. 

‘John, cool.’

‘And you are?’

Bored. Annoyed. Over this interaction. ‘Do I have to tell you?’

‘It’d be nice, yes.’ He then looks at you, really looks at you, then very thoughtfully, he says, ‘You know, you look familiar.’ 

‘I do?’

‘Yeah, I feel like I know you. . . or I’ve seen you somewhere.’

‘You don’t know me.’

‘No, I think I do,’ he waves for the barman’s attention. ‘I think you’re famous.’

‘Well, you’re wrong.’ 

When the barman comes over, John orders himself a scotch. ‘You know, you still haven’t told me your name.’ 

And so, despite your better judgement, you tell him which sparks a conversation. Of course, he’s a ‘finance bro’—his overconfidence is a dead giveaway—and he’s at the restaurant for his uni pal’s bachelor party. There’s a group of them. 

Without being too obvious, your eyes look down at his left hand, which is conveniently hidden away. Your guess is that John’s got a wife at home, and he’s been allowed out for the night, begrudgingly, of course, so he’s trying his luck with you. 

‘Well, since it’s a bachelor party, shouldn’t you be at a gentlemen’s club?’

He shakes his head, ‘Isaac’s not into that.’

‘Isaac is the groom, then?’

‘Yeah.’ 

‘Well, I’m sure Isaac and your friends are missing you, John,’ you raise your glass to your lips. ‘But thanks for the chat.’ 

Your dismissive tone only spurs him on, you literally see his eyes light up. Clearly, he sees you as a challenge, something to conquer. ‘How about you? Are you here alone, with friends?’

You polish off the remainder of your drink, ‘Something like that.’

‘That’s all you have to say?’

‘Well, I–’ Your body tenses when you feel a strong arm snake around your waist, but it immediately relaxes when you smell the all too familiar scent of Jude’s cologne. 

‘I’ve been looking all over for you,’ he says, strategically wedging himself between you and John, his back turned to him. ‘Hi.’

Jude leans over to take your lips in a deep kiss, you know, the kind that you feel deep in your core. God, you love this man.

‘Hi.’ 

You don’t have to force a smile, because you’re genuinely pleased to see him, and at first you can’t read his expression as his perfect brown eyes search your own, but then he smiles, really smiles, which causes you to relax. 

‘Vodka tonic?’ you offer.

‘No,’ he leans over to kiss you again, this time it’s on your forehead. ‘Is that what you’re having?’

‘Yeah,’ you raise a hand to wave the barman over. 

‘What are you doing?’

‘Ordering myself another drink.’

‘No, you’re not.’ 

The tone of his voice is one you know all too well. You know not to push him, you don’t want to push him, ‘cause things between you are actually good.

‘I’m not?’ your tone is teasing.

‘No, you’re not. Come.’ 

Before you can question where he’s taking you, he leads you away from the bar, and you don’t even get the chance to say goodbye to John. 

‘Jude, that’s rude,’ you tell him, suppressing the urge to smile. ‘And where are you taking me?’

‘Back to the hotel.’

Finally, ‘The hotel?’ 

‘Yeah, we’ve had enough socialising for the night.’ 

///

You release a content sigh. ‘You know,’ you start nonchalantly as you leisurely stretch your limbs and flex your toes, ‘I should flirt with random guys at the bar more often.’

Keeping your hands off of each other on the car ride back to the hotel proved quite the struggle. Jude’s earlier possessiveness had you putty in his hands, and his actions, paired with the alcohol in your system, had you ready to jump his bones. 

‘Don’t you dare,’ he playfully admonishes. ‘Don’t even think about it.’

‘I might be inclined to, I like it when you get like that.’

‘Like how?’

‘Possessive and all that,’ your heart swells with pride at the memory of Jude moving you away from John.

‘Oh god.’

You burst into fits of obnoxious giggles when he buries his face in the crook of your neck and starts kissing the area. 

You and Jude had managed to behave yourself in the car and on the elevator ride up to your floor, but the moment you stepped into your suite, he took your wrist into his large hand and tugged you into him. Without a word, he pushed you up against the wall of the dark entrance hall, and took your lips in an impassioned kiss. 

‘Jude, stop!’ you screech. 

‘Promise you won’t flirt with random men.’

‘No!’ 

The kisses intensify, his beard tickling the sensitive skin. 

‘I swear I’ll scream,’ you actually can’t breathe, and your stomach hurts like you’ve been doing crunches. ‘Babe, please!’

‘Promise me.’

‘Okay, okay! I promise,’ you relent. 

And so he stops. 

‘If we get a noise complaint. . .’ 

‘Who cares?’ Jude rolls back to his previous position on the bed, his back pressed against the mattress, his toned torso exposed. 

Instinctively, you follow him, curling into his side, craving the connection. ‘You don’t care?’

He shakes his head, ‘No, do you?’

‘I guess I don’t.’ All you care about is the fact that things between you and Jude are good again, and all is right in your world. ‘I’m hungry.’

‘You are?’

‘Ravenous.’ On cue, your stomach starts to grumble. ‘I’m thinking of having a burger and–’

‘What’s this?’ Jude’s hand moves down to your left hip bone, and his index finger lightly traces over the bruise that’s starting to form. ‘You’re hurt.’

The forming bruise is the result of you being pressed against the entry table as Jude fucked you. 

‘Oh that?’ you weave your fingers with his to stop their tracing motion. ‘Don’t worry about that, I honestly don’t mind it.’ But when his eyes remain fixed on the spot, you insist, ‘Babe, please don’t make a big deal of it. It was good.’

Like, really good. So good, Jude had to put his hand over your mouth just to stop the wanton moans that were spilling profusely from your lips. 

The heat creeps to your cheeks at the very welcomed memory. ‘And by the way, don’t act like you’re not pleased with yourself.’

He doesn’t try to deny it, he simply laughs. 

‘Exactly,’ you rest your head on his chest and focus on the calming steady beat of his heart. You wish you could stay like this with him forever, and abandon all your responsibilities.

‘I love you.’

Jude’s admission catches you off guard. It’s not his first time saying those words to you, he’s said them countless times in the past, but there’s something about the way he says them now. . . it’s so heartfelt. 

‘And look, I know I’ve been a jerk these past few months,’ he continues before you can say anything, ‘but starting tonight, I promise to be better.’

His words, so vulnerable and pure, leave you stunned.

You blink away the tears that are starting to collect in your eyes, ‘Jude. . .’

‘You don’t have to say anything.’

You drape your arm over his torso, and release a shaky breath. ‘I love you too.’

There’s so much you want to add to that, but you don’t trust yourself to not break down in tears. Recently, your relationship has been put through the wringer, and you admit that you’ve still got a long way to go in terms of repairing it, but this moment is proof that it’s still salvageable. 

After a long and comfortable silence, Jude asks, ‘You still hungry?’

‘Mmm.’

‘Here,’ he hands you the in-room dining menu.

You thank him and start scanning the menu’s offerings. ‘The skinny fries sound good.’

‘I thought you said you were ravenous.’

‘Hold on, I’m not done.’ 

Five minutes later, your main and a side with dessert, were on their way. 

‘And now we shower.’ 

You let out an obnoxious groan. 

‘What?’

‘I don’t want to move from here.’

Jude laughs, ‘Sure you do. Come on, Lazybum.’

‘Lazybum?’

He laughs some more. ‘Yeah, Lazybum. Let’s go.’

Nothing against the shower or anything, but you’re worn out and are too hungry to move. ‘Five more minutes.’

‘No, let’s go.’

You raise your head off his chest, and your eyes lock with his, ‘I can’t persuade you to stay in bed longer?’

‘No, not really.’

‘Oh, babe,’ you whine, and move to straddle him. ‘You’re no fun.’

‘I’m no fun? What do you mean I’m no. . .’ The words sort of fade from his lips when you start writhing against  him, the only thing separating you is the bedsheet.  ‘Stop that.’

‘Stop what?’ you feign innocence, your hip gyrations not ceasing. 

‘What you’re doing right now,’ his hands move to your hips to stop their subtle winding motion. ‘It’s distracting.’

You sigh. 

‘And stop pouting.’

‘Make me.’ 

Jude’s eyes light up at your testy attitude. Then he sits up, and with his hands on either side of your face, he pulls you in for a peck. ‘Behave.’ 

‘Yeah, but babe, I–’

‘Hey,’ swiftly and smoothly, his hand grabs a hold of your wrist and starts massaging the spot just past your palm, and he maintains eye contact when he tells you, ‘We’ll shower, then we can lay in bed after.’

‘Okay.’ 

‘Okay?’

You nod, ‘Yeah, okay.’

Your cooperation earns you a second peck.

‘But babe, can we watch a movie after? My choice.’

Despite having to be up early tomorrow to fly back to Madrid, Jude agrees. A post-midnight dinner with a movie and cuddles from Jude, you like the sound of that. You can’t help but stare at Jude’s pert ass when he gets out of the bed—the guy’s got a hot body. 

‘You like what you see?’

You flush, but make no effort to turn away. If he’s going to give you a show, who are you to look away? ‘Shut up.’ 

‘Pervert.’

‘You’re the one slutting yourself out.’

‘Whatever.’

Then with a final kiss, Jude disappears into the bathroom. Some moments pass, and then you hear the shower water run.

You’re scrolling through Netflix’s romance category when you’re interrupted by the incessant buzzing of a phone. Your initial thought is that it’s your manager—who never seems to sleep—calling about a new work opportunity, but when you grab the vibrating device, you discover that it’s Jude’s phone and not yours. And it’s Coralie calling him. 

You think nothing of the fact that she’s calling Jude at such a late hour. It’s probably something work related that can’t wait till morning, and you’re about to answer the call when the vibrating abruptly stops. That’s when you see the text notification displayed on Jude’s lock screen:

Coralie: I’m drunk and I miss you, call me

Heh? 

Your heart starts hammering against your ribcage and a sick feeling settles in the pit of your stomach. 

What? 

The room starts to spin as you struggle to breathe, and you think you might collapse onto the bed.

Is he. . . Surely he’s not cheating on you. With Coralie? 

‘Babe?’ Jude's voice calls from the bathroom, startling you and causing you to almost drop his phone. 

‘I’m coming,’ you absentmindedly respond back. 

‘Hurry.’ 

The cheek, you think as you punch in his phone’s password. 

The phone unlocks and you think what an idiot he must be—a smart cheater would change the password. 

‘Yeah, I’ll be there in a minute.’

You have a very limited time window, so you’ve got to move quickly. The adrenaline rush makes your fingers fumbley and shaky, but you somehow manage to open the WhatsApp app. Coralie’s chat is right at the top ‘cause she was the last one to text him.

If you had more time, you’d peruse through his other contacts to see if he’s texting other girls. 

‘Here goes nothing,’ you tell yourself.

Then with a deep inhale through your nose, you psych yourself up one last time for what’s to come when you open the chat, and then you open it.

Before the bit about being drunk and missing Jude—drunk texts? How corny—Coralie had sent another lengthy text complimenting the way he looked at dinner tonight, and explicitly told him what she wanted to do to him in the restaurant’s loo. 

The fucking bitch! 

How dare she? How dare she act friendly with you knowing very well that she was sending dirty texts to your boyfriend behind your back? And the worst part is that you believed the friendly act, believed that she had good intentions.

Rah! 

But there’s no time to get hung up on that, there’s plenty of time to do that later. Moving quickly, you scroll up the chat and stop at a random spot. 

Jude: Y/N’s in Paris, come over?

You recognise the date to be earlier in the year, when you were in Paris for fittings and shoots. He’d called you really late that night, and he’d told you that he loved and missed you, and that he wished you were at the apartment with him. Basically, he’d lied to you because Coralie was warming his bed that night.

Fuck them both! 

The text thread carries on in a similar fashion: Coralie texts Jude saying that she misses him, he texts her when you’re out of town, and sometimes, on special occasions, she’d send a dirty pic. Or if she’s feeling particularly giving, a video. 

Fuck. 

You angrily toss the phone to one side, and try to contemplate your next move, but your mind is all over the place, and you can barely formulate a cohesive thought. 

What now? 

‘I got tired of waiting for you, and got out.’

You were so lost in your thoughts, you didn’t hear the shower water shut.

‘Hm?’

‘In the shower, I waited for you.’

You don’t like the way Jude says that statement, the accusation in his tone. 

‘I’m. . .’ what is it that you’re trying to say? ‘Oh.’ 

‘Are you okay?’

Far from it, actually. ‘Hey, are you. . .’ you pause to think about how you want to phrase the question. ‘Are you cheating on me?’

He didn’t expect you to ask him that question, and he seems taken aback by it—shaken even. ‘What?’

But he doesn’t deny it.

‘Are you cheating on me?’ you repeat, enunciating every word. ‘With Coralie. Are you cheating on me with Coralie?’

You watch as his world slowly unravels, and you can see the invisible wheels turning in his head as he cooks up a lie.

‘Well, are you?’

‘What, cheating? What are you on about?’

‘About the messages on your fucking phone, Jude,’ you grab the phone from the bed and throw it at him. It hits his leg and then lands on the floor, right before his feet. The sound it makes leads you to think you might’ve broken it. ‘I’m talking about the fuck dates when I’m out of town, the nudes and videos she sends you. I saw it all.’

‘You went through my fucking phone?’

‘That’s all you have to say? “You went through my fucking phone?”’ you mimic the way he posed that very stupid question. ‘Give me a fucking break, Jude. Yeah, I went through your phone, but you’re deflecting.’

‘I’m not deflecting.’

‘Yeah, you are!’ 

‘Keep your fucking voice down!’

‘Are. You. Cheating?’

It’s insulting at this point. You’d much rather have him lie to you, it would send you over the edge, but this? He keeps deflecting, there’s no flattery, no lame excuses. . . His blatant lack of effort hurts more than the actual cheating, it’s like he doesn’t even care to save your relationship. 

‘Y/N, I’m just trying to de-escalate the situation.’ 

‘De-escalate what, exactly? Jude, I don’t need you to de-escalate anything, what I need from you is the fucking truth!’ And if you could scream at the top of your lungs with no repercussions, you would. ‘When did it start?’

‘When did what start?’

‘Your affair.’ 

‘It’s not an affair.’

As if that fucking matters. ‘You keep deflecting!’

‘I’m not!’ he fiercely defends. ‘I just want you to calm down, okay? I just want us to have a normal conversation.’

‘Well, for me to be calm, you’d need to answer my question.’ When a tear escapes from your eye, you quickly swipe it away with the back of your hand. ‘I mean, I know things have been bad between us’ another tear, another swipe ‘lately, but I can’t believe you’d cheat on me.’

And with Coralie, of all people. 

Jude sighs, and you can’t place his emotion. It’s kind of hard to place when he’s saying absolutely nothing. 

‘Are you just going to stand there?’ 

‘What? Now you’ve got a problem with me standing?’

‘You know that’s not what I mean.’ This is exhausting, he is exhausting. ‘You’re just standing there saying nothing.’

‘You’re not allowing me to speak.’

‘You’re not really saying much, are you? “Calm down” is not going to cut it.’ 

‘Well, you keep jumping down my throat.’

‘Blame shifting? Really?’ You sigh, ‘How do you expect me to be calm when you keep shifting the blame and upsetting me?’

‘This is pointless.’ Jude walks over to the bed and takes his seat at the end of it, his muscular back turned to you, head in his hands. ‘You do this every fucking time.’

The words come out muffled.

‘Do what?’

‘Act irrational. It makes it hard to talk to you.’

So according to Jude, voicing your opinions and concerns makes you ‘inconsiderate’ and ‘irrational’.

‘I’m irrational all the time?’

‘Yes.’ After a frustratingly long silence, he lifts his head from his hands and turns to regard you. ‘Look, Y/N, I’m not going to say I’m sorry, ‘cause I’m sure that’s the last thing you want to hear.’ 

‘So you’re not sorry?’

‘I didn’t say I wasn’t.’ He huffs, ‘I thought it was my turn to speak.’

So you bite your tongue and allow him the space to state his case. 

‘Coralie was. . . a mistake,’ he starts once he’s sure you won’t kick off again. ‘A big mistake and something I regret, and if I could take it all back, I would. There’s no excuse for what I did, and my actions are unforgivable, but baby, I meant what I said earlier when I said I loved you and want to do right by you.’ 

I know I’ve been a jerk these past few months, he’d told you, but starting tonight, I promise to be better.

The revelation of Jude’s affair gives his words a whole new meaning. And to think that for the longest time, you believed that you were the issue in your relationship, that your career picking up and you constantly having to be out of the city was the root of your issues. 

‘We were fighting all the time.’

‘I know.’ 

‘And when I’d take the blame, you’d let me.’

‘And I’m so sorry. I really am so sorry.’ Jude reaches a hand out to you, and you don’t push it away, you let him take your hand into his. ‘It’s something I regret every day.’ 

After a long silence, you have to ask, ‘How did it even start?’

‘Babe, please don’t–’

‘No, I want to know,’ you cut him off. 

He’s apprehensive, but to avoid another argument, he tells you how six months ago, so in December, when you were out of town after a big argument between you, Coralie had come to the apartment to help him with something. For whatever reason, they started drinking wine, and one thing quickly led to another, and the next thing he knew, they were fucking. 

He insists that he felt awful after the act, but that the affair continued because he ‘honestly didn’t have the balls to end it,’ and he feared that Coralie, the woman scorned, would run to tell you about it.

‘And then it sort of got out of hand,’ he continues. ‘Whenever we’d fight or I’d be frustrated with something at work, I’d turn to Coralie.’

‘Why?’

‘‘Cause a lot of the time, you weren’t there.’

So your budding career was part of the issue, your lack of availability led him to turn to Coralie for comfort. 

‘You don’t have a functioning hand?’

With a wry smile, he responds, ‘It’s not the same, and you know it.’

You don’t find the humour in what he’s just said.

‘Too soon?’

‘Way too soon.’

‘Sorry,’ he pulls his lower lip between his teeth, a nervous habit. ‘It wasn’t just the sex, it was the connection.’

‘Connection?’ you pull your hand from his. ‘You act like I’m never home.’

‘Y/N, be honest.’

‘About what?’ You feel yourself getting worked up all over again, ‘Jude, if you’re going to accuse me, at least make it make sense. I make it a point to not be gone for more than three days in a week.’

‘I know, but–’

‘And don’t act like you’re not the one always encouraging me to take all these jobs across the world.’ 

And if you really think about it, in the last six months, he’d been more encouraging than ever of your career. 

‘So don’t give me that connection crap,’ you conclude.

‘Why is your voice raising again?’

‘‘Cause you’re really pissing me off, and you’re shifting all the blame to me.’ 

‘I’m not.’

‘Yes you are!’ tears spring back into your eyes. ‘Just admit that you’re a cheater, and that you lack self-control, and that you’re unprofessional, sleeping with the team’s assistant.’ 

‘Fucking hell. . .’

‘It’s not fair that you’re making this all my fault, and I’m not going to stand around for it.’ 

‘Y/N–’

‘No, Jude!’ 

You’re suddenly interrupted by a light knock sounding at the door. When Jude gets up to fetch your food, you slide off of the bed to take the hotel robe to cover yourself with. You hear him thank the person at the door as you crawl back onto the bed, and moments later, he comes back into the room pushing the room service trolley. 

‘Where do you want me to put this?’

‘I’m not hungry anymore.’ 

Jude doesn’t respond to that, he simply abandons the cart and joins you at the bed, closing the distance between you.

‘Don’t.’

‘“Don’t” what?’

‘Sit close to me.’

‘I’m not touching you.’

‘I know but. . .’ 

How do you tell him that sitting in such close proximity to him clouds your judgement and makes it hard for you to be mad at him? 

‘You know, I could always tell she had a thing for you,’ you sigh as you turn away from him, thinking of all the times Coralie had shown interest in Jude. ‘I always just dismissed it as a harmless crush.’

He doesn’t say anything, but then again, what is there to say? 

‘And, like, tonight, she kept asking me about you.’ In fact, she was very pushy in her inquisition. ‘So curious about the details of our relationship. Our sex life. She used the word boring to describe it.’

‘I swear she means nothing to me.’

‘Does she know that? Does she know she means nothing to you?’ 

‘Yes, of course she does.’

‘I doubt it.’ You turn back to Jude. ‘How are you going to end this?’

‘I don’t know.’ 

‘You don’t know?’

‘Yeah, I don’t.’

This is all a mess. All of it is a big, stinky mess and a scandal like this could be detrimental to both your careers should it come out. 

‘Y/N, I’m really sorry and I regret it.’ There is sincerity in his voice, in his eyes. ‘And if you leave me, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life because you’re the best thing to ever happen to me.’

‘That’s not true.’

‘What’s not true?’

‘That I’m the best thing to ever happen to you.’

If it was true, he wouldn’t have cheated on you with the team’s assistant. 

‘It is though.’

‘Whatever,’ you allow yourself to fall back onto the bed, and with a soft grunt, you say, ‘Well, this is a mess.’ 

‘A big one,’ Jude lies down next to you, and weaves his fingers with yours. 

‘I’m so mad at you.’

‘I know.’

‘In fact, I think I hate you.’ 

His grip on your hand tightens, and you think it might be a pained reflex. ‘I know.’ 

‘And I don’t know if I could ever move on from this.’

‘Please try to.’

You turn your head so that the two of you are lying face to face. ‘So what now?’

‘I don’t know,’ he admits. 

And you’re right there with him. You can’t help but feel like this is the calm before the storm. You wouldn’t put it past Coralie to run to the tabloids to share the story of her affair with Jude just for her 15 minutes of fame. 

But it hurts your head to think about that. 

‘I’m tired.’

‘Me too.’ And on cue, Jude yawns obnoxiously loudly. ‘We should sleep.’

‘Yeah.’ 

So you get under the covers, and try to pretend that your entire world isn’t falling apart. You close your eyes and try to force yourself to sleep, but there’s so much going on in your mind. 

Tomorrow is a new day, and who knows what it will bring you? Jude says he’s sorry, and maybe you’re an idiot, but you actually believe him. And as for Coralie? Well, that’s a subject for another day. 

///

‘I guess I’ll see you when you get back to Madrid.’

It’s the morning after, and when you went to bed last night, you weren’t sure what to expect of your morning exchange, but this isn’t it. Things are somewhat awkward between you, but you’re also being cordial and some version of normal in your interactions, which is nice. 

 ‘Yeah, I guess so.’ 

This morning, Jude joined you for an early breakfast in your suite. During the breakfast, you mostly talked about possible vacation spots for the summer, and revised the previous day’s events. With all the arguments happening, you didn’t really get to celebrate the fact that Jude had won his first UCL. 

‘Are you filming today?’

And now he’s standing across from you, dressed and ready to join the rest of the team down at the hotel’s lobby for their flight back to Madrid. 

‘Yeah, but only later.’ You smile, ‘I can’t believe I agreed to this.’

Jude laughs. ‘My very own Kim Kardashian.’

‘You know me,’ you tease. 

There’s actually something you want to tell him, but now doesn’t seem like the right time to. 

‘Is everything okay?’

His simple question is a reminder that you can never truly hide things from him, he’s just so good at reading you. 

‘I’m all good,’ you assure him. ‘I’m just going to miss you, is all.’

He flashes you a bright smile. ‘It’s only a few hours.’ 

‘I know.’ You walk into him, right into his tall and strong frame, and wrap your arms around his muscular torso. ‘I’m, like, really going to miss you.’

‘Why does it feel like you’re saying goodbye to me right now.’

You chuckle. ‘I’m not. I promise you I’m not.’

‘Okay,’ he presses a kiss to the top of your head. ‘Okay.’ 

You don’t immediately release him, you’re not ready to, but he’s got to go—duty calls. 

‘Text me when you land.’

‘Yeah.’ 

With a kiss to the lips, and an ‘I love you’ murmured against them, he’s gone. 

///

An hour later.

The timer you have set starts going off. 

Your heart is hammering against your chest as you reach for the Clearblue home pregnancy test. After Jude had left, you had called the hotel’s front desk to request a pregnancy test, if they had one. Within 15 minutes, there was a woman at your door to deliver it. 

With a shaking hand, you reach for the plastic stick. 

‘Holy fucking. . .’ 

You can’t believe your eyes. 

‘I’m pregnant.’ 

///

REQUESTS ARE OPEN

[tomsparkyr]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑!

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ

summary: when fans find out y/n is realising a new album, it’s not hard to tell who it’s about.

mason mount x fem!reader

smau!

masterlist

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

#mason mount masterlist #mason mount blurb #mason mount imagine #mason mount fanfic #mason mount fluff #mason mount #mason mount smut #mason mount x reader #mason mount x you #mason mount x y/n

[tomsparkyr]

Do you have any enemies to lovers while fake dating prompts?

One my **personal** favourite tropes.

OTP ENEMIES TO LOVERS WHILE FAKE DATING

Prompts

A is reluctantly visiting B in the hospital (maybe they’re the one who put them there) and had to tell the doctors that they’re engaged so they can see them.

A made a bet with an old friend that they’d be dating someone in six months. The six months are up and A doesn’t want to lose the bet, so they get B to pretend to date them for a few days.

A and B were childhood friends who now hate each other. Their families are really close and have no idea that they’re enemies. They pretend to be friends when their families meet up for a party/reunion, but it backfires when everyone just thinks that they’re dating.

A needs B as a fake date for a week long camping trip that doubles as a school reunion (or a family reunion or anything else). Cue one week of hiking, stargazing and being cramped into a tent together.

A and B are part of a criminal group. When they’re caught, they pretend to be married so that they can’t testify against each other in court.

Oneliners

“I’m beginning to think that you don’t hate me as much as you say”

“Woah woah woah, when did this turn into dating?” “Just go with it okay?”

“Complimenting you is revolting”

“I have never felt anything but resentment towards you”

“When you said that you loved me, did you mean it?”

“No offense- actually, full offense, but every time you speak I want to jump out of a window”

“You’re not even my type” “Pshhhh I’m the embodiment of your type”

“This is all fake, don’t you get it?”

“I never though I’d see you like this”

“If you hate holding my hand so much, why haven’t you let go?”

“Come on, it’s obligatory date night”

“Your mother just pulled me aside and told me to call her ‘mom’. I think I’m going to start crying”

“I hate that we have this much in common”

“So thats’s why you don’t talk about your family”

“The whole time we’ve been ‘dating’, we’ve been putting up a front. You’ve fallen in love with an act”

Also see:

Fake dating oneliners

Enemies to Lover oneliners and prompts

More enemies to lovers prompts

Let me know if you’d like me to add to the list.

Leave requests for other oneliners / prompts!

[tomsparkyr]

Hey Natalia, hope you’re doing good ❤️ Please could I request enemies to lovers with Max. You’re constantly at each other’s throats in front of everyone and Christian has had enough of your shit and demands to see you in the office. But when you continue to fight, he’s like nah I don’t wanna be involved, sort your shit out together and leaves. And you end up fucking on his desk and after you’re suddenly super friendly around eachother. Thank you lovely! xxx

Whiplash

Max Verstappen x Red Bull driver!Reader

Summary: You and Max discover that there is a thin line between lust and hate

Warnings: 18+ content

You storm into Christian’s office, scowling as Max follows right behind you. He slams the door shut and you both take a seat across from Christian, refusing to even look at each other.

“I’m sure you both know why I called you in here,” Christian says sternly. “The tension between you two has gone too far. It’s affecting the team and we can’t have that.”

You scoff and cross your arms. “Why don’t you talk to him about it then? I’m not the problem here.”

Max scowls. “Oh please, don’t pretend like you’re so innocent. You’ve been nothing but hostile towards me since the start of the season.”

“Only because you did the same!” You retort. “I was nothing but nice when I first joined the team. You’re the one with the attitude problem.”

“Enough!” Christian shouts, silencing you both. “I don’t care who started it. I’m ending it. We’re in the middle of a championship fight and I need my drivers to work together, not against each other.”

You sink lower in your chair, still refusing to look at Max. The animosity radiates off of him in waves.

“Now you’re going to stay in here until you work this out,” Christian says firmly. “I don’t care if it takes all night. Fix this mess or both of your seats are on the line.”

He heads for the door and you spring up from your chair. “You can’t be serious!”

“Deadly,” Christian replies before shutting the door. You hear the lock click into place from the outside.

You jiggle the handle and pound on the door. “Let us out!”

No response.

He’s really done it, that bastard. Locked you in a room alone with your most hated rival.

You take a deep breath before turning around. Max sits there glaring at you, jaw clenched. “This is ridiculous,” he mutters.

“For once we agree on something,” you snap.

His glare hardens. “Don’t pretend you’re blameless. You’ve been nasty since you got here.”

You storm over to him. “Because you decided to hate me from day one! I tried to be nice but you were so damn hostile. What’s your problem with me anyway?”

Max stands up abruptly, getting in your face. “My problem is you waltzing in here like you own the place when I’m the number one driver.”

You shove him in the chest. “Get over yourself! I earned my spot here.”

He shoves you back. “You don’t deserve to be here.”

Your blood boils as you stare him down. God he’s infuriating. And stubborn as hell. You doubt you’ll ever get him to admit any fault in this situation.

“Well I’m not going anywhere so I guess you’ll just have to get used to it,” you snap.

Max steps even closer, eyes blazing. Your noses nearly touch from how close he stands. “Is that so?” His voice comes out low, almost husky.

A shiver runs down your spine but you keep glaring at him. “Yeah, that’s so.”

You expect him to shoot back some nasty retort. Instead his eyes flick down to your lips for just a moment before meeting your heated gaze again.

Suddenly the energy shifts between you. The anger and tension remains but it transforms into something more primal. More dangerous.

Your breaths come heavier as electricity crackles in the nonexistent space left between you. Max’s pupils are blown wide, his chest rising and falling as rapidly as your own.

“I ...” Your voice comes out hoarse. “We should ...”

But neither of you make any move to step away. Without thinking your tongue darts out to wet your dry lips. Max tracks the movement with his intense stare.

“Fuck it,” he growls before crashing his mouth onto yours.

You gasp into the kiss and he takes advantage, deepening it. His hands grasp your hips roughly as he walks you backwards until your back hits the wall.

You barely process what’s happening. One second you were at each other’s throats, the next his body is pressing urgently against yours.

A moan escapes you when his lips move to your neck. He nips at the sensitive skin there and you thread your fingers into his hair.

“This is insane,” you pant out even as you tug him closer.

“I know,” Max breathes against your neck. His hands skim up your sides, pushing up your shirt. “I hate you.”

“I hate you more.” You crash your lips together again, tasting blood when you nip at him.

Max groans into your mouth as your tongues slide together. He hitches one of your legs around his hip, grinding against you.

You break the kiss to tip your head back, moaning at the feeling. Fuck, you despise this man, but right now you need him more than anything.

His hips keep up that delicious friction as he mouths at your collarbone. “I’m still going to beat you,” he rasps out.

You smirk, nails digging into his shoulders. “In your dreams.”

Max’s eyes darken at your taunt. Without warning, he grips your thighs and lifts you onto Christian’s desk. You gasp as he pushes between your legs, his growing arousal obvious.

“Careful what you wish for,” he murmurs before crushing his mouth to yours once more.

You moan into the frenzied kiss, tongues tangling as you tug at his hair. His hands slide up your thighs, fumbling with the button of your jeans to push them down around your ankles. You wrap your legs around him, pulling him against your heated core.

Even through the layers of clothing you can feel how hard he is. You rock your hips, desperate for more friction. Max groans and moves his lips to your neck, nipping down to your collarbone.

Your head tips back as his fingers dance up your sides, thumbs brushing the undersides of your breasts. “God, I hate you so much,” you moan.

“I know.” His voice comes out rough, filled with lust.

Impatient, you reach for the hem of his shirt and pull it over his head, tossing it aside. Your eyes rake over his muscular chest and arms. Unable to resist, you lean in and scrape your teeth over his nipple.

Max hisses in a breath, hands clenching on your hips. “Fuck ...”

You grin, laving your tongue over the sensitive nub as your fingers move to his belt buckle. With shaky hands you get it open and reach into his boxers, fingers wrapping around his thick length.

He shudders against you. “Shit, Y/N ...”

You stroke him firmly, reveling in the moans and curses falling from his lips. His own hands move under your shirt, palming your breasts through your bra.

It’s not enough. You strip off your shirt and reach back to unclasp your bra. Max wastes no time dipping his head to capture one of your nipples between his lips.

“Oh god ...” you gasp, back arching into him. His teeth and tongue work over your sensitive peaks until you’re writhing beneath him.

The sound of voices outside the door makes you both freeze. Fuck. The race weekend is still going on around you. Anyone could walk by and hear what’s happening.

You meet Max’s heated gaze. “We should stop,” you pant out half-heartedly.

His eyes blaze with defiance and lust. “No fucking way.”

Before you can react he drops to his knees, grasping your hips to pull you towards the edge of the desk.

Max tugs strongly on your lacy underwear until it gives way at the seams, baring you to him. He pauses to appreciate the view, eyes roaming hungrily over your glistening folds.

“I’m still going to beat you tomorrow,” he rasps.

You tug on his hair impatiently. “Just get on with it before we get caught.”

With a wicked grin he dives in, mouth latching onto your throbbing clit. You cry out, quickly slapping a hand over your own mouth.

You fumble with his belt, desperate to feel him. Max groans as you wrap your hand around his length.

“Fuck, just like that,” he groans against your skin, increasing the rhythm of his tongue in response. The desk rocks dangerously beneath you but neither of you slow your ministrations.

You whimper his name, pleasure building steadily under his expert touch. The fingers of one hand twist in his hair while you keep your other hand moving up and down in measured strokes as you near the edge.

“Look at me,” Max commands raggedly. You open your eyes to meet his wild gaze. The connection between you crackles.

“Max ...” you gasp as your climax crashes over you. You slap a hand over your lips, muffling your cries.

As you float back down, Max withdraws his mouth. You keen at the loss but then he’s lining himself up at your entrance. Gripping your hip tightly, he pushes inside in one smooth motion.

You cling to his shoulders, nails digging in as you adjust around him. Max trembles with restraint, giving you a moment before he starts to move.

Then he sets a relentless pace, the desk slamming against the wall with each powerful snap of his hips. You wrap your legs around him, spurring him even deeper.

Max pounds into you relentlessly, wrenching desperate moans from your lips. You’re vaguely aware of picture frames and papers tumbling to the floor around you but the chaos only adds to the thrill.

You’re close, the pressure building deep inside. With a few more well-angled thrusts you topple over the edge, coming hard around him. Your breasts bounce as your back arches sharply off the desk.

“There you go, princess,” Max rasps. He continues driving into your spasming center until his rhythm turns choppy and erratic.

“Fuck, I’m close,” Max grits out. You clench around him, greedy for his release. His hips stutter and then he spills inside you with a guttural groan. The sensation pushes you over the edge again, your vision whiting out from the intensity.

Breathing raggedly, Max collapses on top of you, pinning you to the desk. You’re both slick with sweat and utterly spent, your heart rates slowly returning to normal. You run your fingers through his damp waves soothingly.

The room is silent save for your heavy breathing. As the haze of lust clears, the ramifications of what just happened settle over you.

You just slept with your sworn rival on your team principal’s desk.

After a long moment Max pulls out of you and steps back, tucking himself away. On shaky legs you slide off the desk, stumbling slightly as you find your feet, and rush to put on your clothes.

Max grabs his shirt off the floor and shrugs back into it. His hair is mussed wildly and his lips are kiss-swollen. You’re sure you look much the same.

You and Max spring apart at the sound of the lock clicking open. Christian strides back into his office, oblivious to the disheveled state that both of his drivers are in.

“Well, have you two worked out your differences?” He looks between you expectantly.

You smooth down your rumpled shirt and attempt to tuck your wild hair back into place. Your cheeks flame as you meet Christian’s gaze.

“I think we’ve come to an ... understanding,” Max says evenly, though you notice a hint of color in his cheeks as well.

Christian surveys his office, taking in the askew trophies and books scattered across the floor. You hold your breath, certain he’s going to put two and two together.

“It seems you had a disagreement about reorganizing my office during your chat,” Christian says wryly.

You nearly choke in surprise. Does he really not realize what just transpired on his desk? You chance a glance at Max and have to suppress a hysterical giggle at the disbelief on his face.

“I apologize for the mess, we got a bit ... heated,” you say, biting your lip to keep from laughing at the double meaning.

“Yes, clearly things escalated between you two.” Christian frowns at a photo of him and Dietrich Mateschitz now lying cracked on the floor. You resist the urge to shrink under his disappointed dad stare.

“However, the important thing is you’ve worked through this animosity once and for all, correct?” He looks between you expectantly.

You and Max nod in unison. “Water under the bridge,” Max assures him. You’re impressed by how steady he manages to keep his voice even as you can see the barely contained mirth dancing in his eyes.

“Excellent. I’ll inform the team that tensions are resolved and they can stop walking on eggshells around the both of you.” Christian claps his hands together, apparently satisfied. “Now get out of here and get ready for free practice.”

You and Max don’t need telling twice. As soon as the door shuts behind you, the laughter you’ve been holding in bubbles out.

“I can’t believe he actually bought that,” Max says between chuckles.

“We literally destroyed his office and he thinks we just had a minor spat,” you giggle, shaking your head incredulously.

Your laughter trails off as the reality of what happened sinks in. You just had crazy hot sex with Max Verstappen. Where do you go from here?

Before you can overthink it, Max presses a soft kiss to your lips. “Meet me at the hotel tonight? We should continue this conversation somewhere more private,” he murmurs suggestively.

You bite your lip but find yourself nodding. As complicated and ill-advised as this may be, you can’t find it in yourself to deny your attraction to Max now that you’ve given in to it.

“It’s a date,” you whisper back.

Max grins and steals another quick kiss before you part ways to get changed.

[tomsparkyr]

happy womens day to everyones favorite woman

[tomsparkyr]

felix finger fucking you during dinner at saltburn ; mdni

you lazily move your fork around the fancy plate in front of you as elsbeth continues making small talk with oliver, your boyfriend’s newest friend. you’ve tuned out all the voices around you, your boredom increasing with every passing second, starting to become evident on your face as your lips form into a slight pout. this catches the attention of felix, who’s sitting next you and is being equally as quiet as you, aside from the occasional comment towards oliver.

“what’s up?” he leans towards you in his chair, his voice a soft whisper, making sure no one at the table questions the two of you.

you turn to face him as he pulls back away from you, awaiting your response. “i love you, and your family, but i’m honestly so bored.” this time, you lean towards him and whisper in his ear.

“no worries. i feel the same.” he lets out a small laugh. you sit up straight again, going back to your previous boredom. felix has different plans, however, carefully reaching his hand down to your thigh, giving it a small squeeze. you look down at his hand, then look back up at him, a mixture of confusion and lust in your eyes. you open your mouth to say something, but he’s quick to cut you off. “no one’s paying attention to us right now, they won’t notice.” he whispers.

you nod, looking away from him, pretending to suddenly be interested in the conversation of the other’s at the table. he takes this as his sign to keeping going, so he moves his hand slightly up to the hem of your skirt, reaching under your panties, sliding his hand even farther down, stopping at he entrance of your cunt. your body shivers when the cold metal of his rings makes contact with your folds, your thighs clenching together. you bite your lip in anticipation, your gaze shifting to your plate. felix enters two of his fingers into your wet cunt with ease, starting to slowly pump his fingers. your breathing becomes slow and soft as you keep your moans suppressed by pressing your lips together, remaining a normal expression. the pace of his fingers increase bit by bit, hitting that sweet spot in your tight pussy every time his fingers move deeper into you. you subtly grind your hips to match the motion of his fingers. curling his fingers, felix adds to your pleasure, your cunt starting to clench around them. you turn your head to look at him with desperation in your eyes. he gives you a a cocky smirk, the two of you staring at each other as he uses his fingers to push you over the edge, your thighs shaking as you reach your high. your mouth opens to let out your moans, but you’re quick to close your lips, remaining silent. cumming on his fingers, he pulls them out of your pussy and takes his hand back out of your skirt. felix can’t wait for the painfully long dinner to be over, so you can sneak up to his room and deal with the growing tent in his dress pants.

[tomsparkyr]

die for you.

ln x driver!reader

in which you can’t stand each other, or so you say…

this took waaaay too long for me to hate it sm but she’s here! and she’s long! love this concept so much, thank you for this request. so many feels so many vibes, tell me what you think <3

loosely inspired by die for you by the weeknd

warnings: 18+!! minors dni!! smut, language, slight glimpses of she fell first, he fell harder, rivals to lovers/enemies to lovers, choking, hate sex? bar fight, mentions of blood

8.3k words (oop)

it’s rare that you miss a podium, so when you do, it tastes bitter and stings like a bitch.

the car has been on fire all season long, a thing of beauty in your calculated hands. so, the string of bad luck you’re enduring, small mistakes with big consequences, it’s quite the pill to swallow.

out of the car you jump, teeth grinding hard out of frustration. you could see the commotion ahead of you, members of the papaya team celebrating their driver. your eyes roll so hard in your head that you feel a lasting ache. you side step members of your team, dodging every single person that tries to talk to you, your comms officer knowing better than to try and engage with you. you know you’re being unreasonable, it was a p5 finish! but it isn’t a podium or a win, so quite frankly, you aren’t interested, and you certainly don’t have any energy left to hear how amazingly well he had driven.

lando fucking norris.

what was once quiet disdain had grown into fully fledged hatred and you fear you’ll be violently sick if you catch a single glimpse of him on the podium. sure, he’s talented, and sure, he’s beautiful, you suppose. that doesn’t mean you have to like him. not anymore. he lives under your skin, inescapable.

you struggle through every interview in the media pen, most of which dissect your recent fall from grace, your mouth forming a hard, unimpressed line every time they mention the orange goblin and his recent streak of podiums and good luck. you wish the journos would bring up his string of women and the probable plan b receipts that went with them. that, you would love to talk about.

you drive in silence back to your hotel, leaving the track as soon as possible, and quickly find solace in your bed for the night. the idea of seeing the inside of a club makes you nauseous after your epic downfall. as your eyes are drooping, your body going limp under the thick duvet, a knock sounds from the door.

“no.” you shout flatly, but the only response you get are giggles from the hallway. for fuck sake, you mutter, groaning as you shift out from beneath the covers and trail apprehensively towards the door.

george and alex appear before you, and you throw your head back is exasperation.

“mate, it’s 9:30.” alex laughs, taking in your fancy attire; pyjamas that you’ve had since you were 17.

“what’s your point?” you croak, glaring up at your obnoxiously tall friend.

“why aren’t you getting ready to go out?” george questions, leaning against the doorframe. he, too, was obnoxiously tall, you thought, feeling the strain in your neck as you move your glare onto him.

“if it wasn’t obvious, i’m not going.” you deadpan, crossing your arms over your chest. “i thought that was clear after i ignored all 77 of your texts.” you smile sarcastically, rubbing sleep from your eyes.

“don’t be boring! you’re an f1 driver, you’re in a cool city, you’re rich and, let’s face it,” he sasses. “you need to get laid.” alex says, like it’s the most causal thing in the world. your eyes bulge out of your head at the utterance of the last bit. george bites back laughter.

“choosing to ignore that.” you hiss. “i’m sorry but i refuse to go out and celebrate that arrogant, whiny little bitch.”

they both know exactly who you’re talking about.

you and lando have simply never seen eye to eye. your karting days were spent pushing one another off the track or into a muddy puddle if things got a bit heated out of the car. sure, olive branches were extended, and maybe adolescent feelings were secretly harboured, but he never gave you any reason to tell him that. you’d grown out of the childish violence when you graduated into formula 1, but you hadn’t been able to shake the rage he made you feel.

it didn’t matter how many dinners you attended where others had conspired and forced you to sit next to each other. it didn’t matter how many times you turned up to play padel and were met with the same lame excuses of ‘oh, did we not mention lando would be here?’ it didn’t matter how many times you’d hugged it out on the podium while adrenaline and tensions were running high.

it didn’t matter how many times he’d watched you from across a crowded room and you’d found his eyes, watched him back. it didn’t matter how many times he’d smirked at you at the start of a race weekend, made you blush. and it certainly didn’t matter what happened last time you found yourself in a club with him.

you just don’t like him. not anymore. you sleep better at night when you lie to yourself.

~ the last time

you sink shot after shot, cocktail after cocktail; the taste of fruity liquor stains your lips and burns your throat. you feel electric, sizzling with ecstasy and the heat from the flashing lights above your head.

it’s approaching 4am and you can’t recall a time in your life where you’d felt so fucking good. the high of your first win is indescribable.

you’ve lost track of the guys, alex and george have packed it in and gone back to their hotels with their girlfriends. pierre and kika are somewhere in a corner, you’re certain. you’re pretty sure you’ve even seen lewis with his entourage and a brick wall of a bodyguard trailing behind him. and at the bar, a set of eyes watch you.

lando isn’t even listening to oscar anymore, no. he is too entranced in the way your hips move to the beat, lost in the carefree lines your body makes in the crowd. he’s itching to go to you, put his hands in places that would stay between you, him, and god, but he doesn’t think a broken nose would be good for business.

everything changes when you spin around, facing his direction. then, it begins: the same thing that happens every time you end up going out in the same group. you watch one another, pretending you’re not both achingly desperate to find out how the other tastes.

but lando is feeling bold. he tells oscar he’ll see him in the morning, and then, egged on by a moscow mule and a few too many shots, he makes his way towards you. it is instinctual, magnetic, the way he is drawn to you.

hands on your hips, lips on your neck. the song changes. you recognise the weeknd’s voice. you are disappointed in yourself but it feels too good to stop.

you know what i’m thinkin', see it in your eyes
you hate that you want me, hate it when you cry
you’re scared to be lonely, 'specially in the night
i’m scared that i’ll miss you, happens every time

the lyrics sober you up. you’re in the first taxi you can see when you finally get outside.

alone.

~

as much as that memory makes you shiver, for several different reasons, you find yourself putting on some makeup and raking through your suitcase for something to wear. george and alex are waiting downstairs for you at the bar, and when you finally make your way down there, they have a martini waiting for you. they watch in impressed horror as the alcohol disappears from the glass mere seconds after it touches your lips.

“let’s get this over with.” you sigh.

-

it could have been worse, you suppose.

the club is packed, hundreds of faces blurring into nothing. you feel better knowing that there is a one in a million chance of running into lando.

you’re tucked into a booth with alex and george, carmen and lily, a few faces you can’t quite place, and charles and pierre. you’d conspired to sit on the outside, prepared to make a quick getaway at the first sign of tension.

you’d been in a state of fight or flight since your last run in, nails bitten down every time you thought about his hands on you, how good they felt on you. it scared you more than anything had in a long time, how your desire had festered.

you go to take a swig from your glass, only to find it empty, aside from a few sad ice cubes. you watch jealously as they melt into nothing, wishing they would take you with them, shoving your glass across the smooth table top when your frustration boils over.

you’re on edge, ridiculously afraid of bumping into a curly haired man. it wasn’t him you were scared of, per-say, more yourself. god knows what you’d do if you felt those warm, calloused hands pulling your hips into his again.

“you okay?” pierre calls across the table. he and charles abandon their conversation as soon as your glass goes flying towards their side of the table. you’re broken out of your trance, caught off guard like a deer in headlights.

“tired.” you reply, shrugging it off like it was nothing. it’s clear immediately that they don’t buy it.

“she’s hiding.” alex chimes in from beside you, and your elbow goes straight into his ribs. he feigns pain for a moment, cackling at your reaction.

“from who?” charles inquires. you roll your eyes, blush spreading down your neck already. you hate everything about the conversation, and yet you need to see where it goes. you’d planned your escape, and now was the opportune time to make it, but you seem to be glued to the leather of the booth.

“lando.” george smirks into his drink as a he speaks, wiggles his eyebrows.

“oh yeah, we know all about that.” pierre laughs, his head tipping back in amusement.

“what?” you spit, eyes wide with confusion.

“don’t think me and kika didn’t see you two before the summer break. that night you won? we thought you’d finally cave.” pierre explains, his grin conveying pure evil.

several “what?!”’s sound from around the table, and now all eyes are on you.

“nothing even happened.” you mumble. “he came over to me and then i left.” you look away, twisting your hair around your finger. you are sweating.

“you looked like you were minutes away from being arrested for public indecency.” pierre smirks. you almost launch yourself across the table, intent on strangling him, and then perhaps throwing yourself in front of an oncoming uber outside.

“well, well, well. i fucking knew it.” alex is giggling beside you.

“come on guys, leave the poor girl alone.” lily winks at you, but even she has a twinkle in her eye. “there’s obviously feelings there.” and just like that she betrays you. her sympathetic smile doesn’t make you forgive her.

“i think you guys just need to get it out of your system,” charles starts, pausing to take a sip of his drink. “just fuck.” he waves his hand, like it was the most causal thing in the world.

the table erupts in laughter and you decide that you are well past the end of your tether. you shake your head, declaring that you need another drink, or ten, and strut away from the table. a chorus of ‘love you’-s and ‘get some’-s sound from behind you. you reply simply by raising your middle finger and refusing to look back.

the bar is in sight, just about in your reach when your evening goes from mildly bad to aggressively worse.

“fuck sake.” you sigh.

“and good evening to you too.” lando replies. he’s blocking your path, materialising before you out of nowhere.

“get out of my way, lan.” it sounds like you’re pleading and you cringe internally.

“don’t you wanna congratulate me?” he feigns a pout and you almost swing for him.

“no, not particularly.” you say dryly. “all i want is a drink, so if you’d just…” you gesture for him to move. of course, he doesn’t.

“haven’t seen you in a while, though. thought maybe you’d missed me.” he takes a step closer; goosebumps litter your bare skin.

“you are such an entitled prick.” you spit, moving to step around him but he catches you, gripping your wrists and pulling you in. you feel heat radiating off of him, expensive cologne overwhelming you in the best possible way.

“and you, honey, are such a fucking brat. but you don’t hear me complaining, do you?” lando whispers, cool breath hitting your face, minty, laced with champagne and cockiness. you almost fold, thighs clenching so tight that he must have noticed.

“move.” you grumble through gritted teeth. you are crumbling painfully, embarrassingly fast.

“make me.” your underwear is damp, but you are fuming.

“don’t fucking test me, lando.” something in your chest sets on fire and you’re over him and his bullshit, and the way he makes you feel.

“i know you want me.” he dips his forehead down to rest gently against yours. his grip on your wrists tightens, thumbs swirling circles into the flesh, right where your pulse is.

you lean in, mere centimetres separating your lips. his eyes darken, the assumption of victory over you tugs his lips into a smirk.

“all i want is my fucking drink. come find me when you’ve managed to navigate your gigantic, stupid head out of your arse.” you catch him off guard, wriggling out of his grip. you’re shaking when you walk away, thoughts of doing things with him that would get you both fired invading your foggy brain.

you try to disappear into the crowd, finally breathe a sigh of relief when your hands meet the cool surface of the bar. you order your drink, putting it on your tab and drum your nails against the marble top. you’re lost in your own world, watching as concoctions are mixed, as shots are downed. you finally feel at ease, until your evening takes yet another turn, one that was somehow even more unfortunate than all the others.

your attention is rudely stolen by the guy stood next to you.

“can i get that for you?” the random man speaks, in a way that he must of assumed was smooth. slimy, you think. he’s gesturing to your drink, clearly having watched you add it to your bill already.

“no, thank you. it’s already paid for.” you smile politely, turning on your heel. it seems he wasn’t quite done with you. you feel a clammy hand tug on yours, a wave of sickness washes over you.

lando’s hands are bigger, warmer, softer.

“where are you rushing off to, babe?” the sweaty man asks, his tone fake in a way that makes you uneasy.

“i need to get back to my friends.” you try to pull your hand free, but he won’t budge. “can you let go-“

“i can show you a good time. always thought you were kinda hot.” you’re panicking now, looking every which way for a familiar face, a security guard, anyone.

“take your hands off of me.” you snap, still wrestling to pull yourself free.

“one night with me would pull you out of that little slump you’re in.” he leers. you visibly gag, white hot rage blurs your vision.

“okay you piece of shi-“ you snarl, interrupted by a flash of curls and tanned skin.

“she told you to let go.” lando stands in front of you protectively, rigid and furious. you’ve never been so happy to see his annoying(ly beautiful) face.

“and what are you gonna do?”

“hands. off.” lando stands up even straighter, looking bigger than you’ve ever seen him.

“okay, mate, whatever.” the stranger rolls his eyes, shoves your hand away.

lando turns to you, opening his mouth to speak when…

“keep that stuck up bitch all to yourself.”

and then, everything goes to shit.

lando whips around, fists are flying, the stranger topples to the ground, amassed to nothing in the face of the mclaren drivers rage. lando doesn’t stop there, makes sure he is sufficiently dealt with, flat on his back on the sticky floor. you don’t know what to do, calling out for lando, begging him to stop, as satisfied as you are. lando hears your shouts, pulled out of the chaos and back to you. always back to you.

“are you okay?” he has his hands on your face searching for any remaining fear or upset. a crowd has formed and you see alex and george towering above the other club goers, jaws agape.

it’s as if he dj has it out for you, and you realise that the song has changed to something moodier, slower, one that gives you whiplash.

even though we're going through it
and it makes you feel alone
just know that i would die for you
baby, i would die for you

“we need to get out of here. security are coming.” you mutter, keening into his touch.

“i have a car outside.”

“well, let’s use it then.”

-

you can’t help but stroke over his knuckles mindlessly in the car, an unlikely comfortable silence settling between you. they look raw, cracked slightly and you have an overwhelming desire to kiss them better. your head is fuzzy, and you’re unsettled with confusion, but at the same time, you feel lighter.

“why did you do that?” you murmur, disrupting the quiet that has settled over the backseat of the town car, the question burning desperately on your tongue.

lando turns his head so that he’s looking down at you, his good hand comes up to cup your jaw softly.

“no one can talk to you like that.” he’s staring so deeply into your eyes and you almost squirm at the intensity. you feel exposed, bare.

“but why did you step in before that?” you reiterate shakily. lando hums in understanding.

“i’ve known you since we were 10 years old. i know when you’re scared.” he whispers, breath dusting your cheeks. you almost lean in, then, something about his words pull you even closer towards him. you feel warmth creeping over your chest, sinking into the pit of your belly.

“we’ve arrived.” the driver calls from the front, signalling that you need to get out of the car. it was like an elastic band had snapped, and you spring away from lando, scrambling to undo your seat belt, the moment of weakness long gone.

you sneak into the lobby, on the lookout for any angry PR teams or incognito photographers that are scoping for their next pay check. the coast seems clear, so you manage to scurry discreetly into the elevator. you hit the button for the third floor.

“can you hit the button for five?” lando asks, leaning against the opposite wall.

“you’re coming to my room.” you state, offering no other explanation, even when he raises his eyebrows.

the ding of the lift has lando pushing himself off of the mirrored wall, trailing behind you into the corridor. the lights are low as he follows you to your door, hands deep in the pockets of his jeans. he watches in anticipation as you rifle through your small bag for your keycard. the green light gives you the go ahead to open the door, and he awkwardly follows you inside, peering around the room.

you notice the slight apprehension in his features, eyes blown wide from alcohol and adrenaline. they seem to sparkle more than you’d seen in a while, a hazel-y blue twisting with secrets and unspoken thoughts.

“let me find my first aid kit.” you tell him. you guide him towards the foot of your bed, gesture for him to sit. “make yourself comfortable.”

“you don’t need to do this.” lando replies, sitting down anyway.

“and you didn’t need to get between me and that dickhead but here we are.”

your words elicit a low chuckle from him, and you’re glad you have your back to him while you dig through your suitcase. he can’t see your smile at the wholesome sound, and he doesn’t need to.

random pieces of clothing fall out of the bag as you rummage through it, your attention taken up completely by your mission to find the small box. you don’t notice the pile of garments littering the floor.

“wow, didn’t take you for that kinda girl.” lando teases. your cheeks flame red when you catch sight of the cherry red thong that has managed to get caught in the wheel of your suitcase.

“shut up, i’m helping you.” you grumble, balling up the lace and burying it at the bottom of the case.

“why is it ferrari coloured? something you wanna tell me? do you think charles is… foxy? or is it fred? oh, i bet it’s fred, isn’t it.” he’s laughing now, loud and boisterous, and if it wasn’t for the butterflies erupting in your belly at the sound, you would have throttled him.

“i’ll leave you to bleed out.” you tease back, pointing at the dried up blood across his knuckles.

“of course, i am in urgent need of medical attention!” he exclaims sarcastically, clutching his hand. you roll your eyes.

“you know where the door is.” you stand from the floor, carrying a little square antiseptic wipe with you.

“yeah, i do. feel like staying now, though. i’m just so comfy.”

and with that, he throws himself back on your bed, closing his eyes as he sinks into the mattress.

you stare at him for a second, noticing the way his eyelashes dust the tops of his cheeks, his tanned, thick neck peeks out from in between the undone buttons of his dress shirt. you exhale shakily, moving to sit beside him on the bed.

“give me your hand.” you instruct him, tearing the packet open and unfolding the wipe.

“romantic.” lando snarks. you shove his shoulder in response. he holds his hand out.

“whatever.” you sigh, avoiding eye contact as you run the wipe over his knuckles. you can see how they are already tinged purple, wincing at the idea that it is your fault.

“what is it?” lando asks, noticing.

you don’t respond. this proximity is odd, you can’t quite tell yet if you like it. what you do know is that you certainly don’t know how to handle him now that the alcohol is wearing off and you’re left tending to the wounds of a man that you could have sworn you didn’t like.

“so that’s how it’s gonna be? we’re going back to the silent treatment again?” lando scoffs.

“don’t know what to say.” you mutter, keeping your eyes trained on every line and indent of his knuckles.

“why do you hate me so much?”

“i don’t.”

“yes, you do.” he scoffs.

“i don’t think about you enough to hate you.” you lie. it’s cruel. he winces.

that shuts him up.

“i’m gonna go. thanks for this.” lando waves his hand and you feel a wave of guilt hit.

“no, fuck, i’m sorry.” you apologise, bowing your head. “stay.”

“i’ll stay if you tell me why you hate me.”

“i’ve never hated you, lan. haven’t always particularly liked you but i never, ever hated you.”

“okay.”

that’s all it takes for him to flop back onto the bed. some unexplainable instinct that you loathe has you crawling onto the bed beside him. you wrap your arms around your pillow, watching him watch you.

“i used to have such a big crush on you, you know.” lando says. you stare at him blankly.

“what?”

“yep. i think i was about 15. you were the first girl i ever really liked that way.” he smiles, recalling the memory. “it kinda sucked because i knew you wouldn’t even look at me twice but it’s funny thinking back to that time.”

~ 15

he watches the way her hair gets caught in the breeze as she takes off her helmet. two messy braids are shaken free, and his heart skips a beat or two, or seven, when she turns around with the biggest grin on her face.

she’s just won a race, another one, and he’d be so jealous if it wasn’t her.

he thinks she’s the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen. george and alex go over to her, congratulating her, hugging her. he wishes he could do that. he definitely can’t.

she doesn’t see him, the only times that she does are when they argue, when they push eachother off the track and scream at one another across a gravel trap. the times when she plants her pointed finger in his chest and calls him dirty, the times he gets heated and calls her something he doesn’t mean under his breath. and she always hears him. always. he watches her eyes pool with tears every single time.

he wants her, in a way he’s never wanted anyone before. he’s never felt like this, wonders how he can make it go away. she hates him. she must.

he can never have her, so why even try?

~

“i had no idea you ever felt that way.” you’re quite shocked, really. you knew that you had this intensely charged sexual tension between you now, but you had failed to realise how far back this all went.

mutually, at least.

“i’d say i’ve done a pretty good job of hiding it.” his smile changes slightly. it was now a sad smile, one that conveys disappointment in himself, and that you hated to see. it reminds you of the one you’ve gotten used to seeing on your social media feed after he’d had a shitty race.

you sigh, bracing yourself for what you are about to say.

“you’re not the only one who hid it.” you raise an eyebrow, your face says ‘guilty!’

“no?” lando’s eyes widen at your revelation.

“i think we were 13. you gave me half a cookie to apologise for pushing me off track.” you smile coyly. “it’s kinda sad but 13 year old me died inside.” you laugh.

“so, we’ve both… liked each other.” lando assesses. you nod.

“when did you stop?” you inquire, scanning his face. you take in each detail, each individual freckle, the curve of his lips. he seems closer, all of the sudden, and that’s when you realise you’ve closed the space between you. lando is within reach now, it would have been so, so incredibly easy to shift even closer still; it was like you were in his gravitational field, reeled in by pretty, pretty eyes.

“who said i stopped?”

“oh.” you breathe.

~ 13

he snaps the crumbly biscuit between his fingers, trails towards her awkwardly. he feels bad, feels a strange pang in his chest that he doesn’t recognise.

he finds her around the back of her parents car, arms crossed, eyebrows scrunched, pouting hard. he thinks she’s cute.

“why are you here?” she whines.

“this is for you. i know it doesn’t make up for the race. i didn’t mean to take you out, i swear.”

he sounds panicked, sincere. her tummy turns funny.

he’s holding out a cookie, the children’s equivalent of an olive branch.

her face softens. she accepts it. they bite into their cookies at the same time.

it’s not the worst day in the world anymore.

~

messy kisses and soft whispers lull you to sleep.

his nose bumps yours every time your lips meet, gentle and plush.

you feel delicate in his arms, treasured. his lips press gently to your hairline. he’s different, softer than you’ve seen him since you were teenagers splitting cookies.

it’s the easiest thing in the world to curl into his side, mould together until you’re part of him, and drift off.

-

the heat wakes you up.

you stir, eyes fluttering open, searching for the source of the onslaught of warmth. it clicks quickly, and you realise that you hadn’t dreamt the events of the night before.

lando is in your bed.

lando had protected you.

lando had wanted you since you were stupid kids who didn’t know any better.

he is the heater that had woken you up, and suddenly you don’t care that you’re far too hot. you curl back into his side, head rests on his chest. it rises and falls softly, his heartbeat thrums beneath your ear. you are jealous of how pretty he looks when he’s asleep, relaxed and infatuating. you lose track of time, gazing up at him.

a sharp pain in your side makes you groan. you had fallen asleep in your dress, lando in his jeans and his shirt, and now you’re paying for it, your fingers searching for the zipper that was now digging into your side. your movements draw him out of his slumber, and when you look back at him, he’s watching you, rubbing sleep from his eyes.

“you okay?” lando croaks, his voice deep and sleepy. it sends shockwaves through you.

“mhm. how did you sleep?” you ask, mindlessly running your hand over his jaw like it was the most natural thing in the world. a smile breaks out across his face, eyes fluttering shut once more.

“really fucking well.” he laughs, almost in disbelief.

“yeah, me too.” you smile at him, shy.

“what’s bothering you?”

“well, a human heater woke me up and now this fucking zipper is killing me.” you joke. it’s weird that this doesn’t feel weird.

“i am pretty hot i guess.”

“yeah, yeah.” you roll your eyes and stand from the bed.

lando sits up, resting on his elbows. his eyes follow you as you walk around the room. you take a bottle of water, drinking half of it before passing it to him. his lips wrap around the bottle and you have to turn away, the ache between your legs that you’d been fighting for months rearing it’s irritating head. you clear your throat, composing yourself.

“need to get this dress off.”

lando pulls himself off of the mattress, stalking towards you. you stop in your tracks and he meets you at the foot of the bed. his hands find your cheeks, thumbs smoothing over your skin in little circles, and then kisses you deeper than he did last night.

it’s impossible not to melt into him, hands running over his chest, his shoulders, and finally finding solace tangled in his curls. if someone told you the morning before that you’d wake up in lando’s arms, you would have cackled, urged them to seek medical attention, and probably spat in their face. how things change.

“i think you should keep it on, look so pretty.” lando breathes, staring down at you. you blush hard, leaning into him.

“but i’m uncomfortable.” you grin coyly. and then, a surge of confidence has you whispering: “i’ll let you take it off if you want.”

“let me make you comfortable first.” lando murmurs, dipping his head down until it rests in the crook of your neck. “want me to get you nice and comfortable, baby?” he kisses up your neck.

you cave, finally.

it takes him all of thirty seconds to have you spread out on his face, laying himself down on the mattress and pulling you on top of him so that you’re hovering over his lips. he mouthes at your panties for a second, getting his first taste of you, and then he drags them to the side, clearing a path. his tongue laves over your cunt, groaning as soon as he gets a proper taste.

your dress fans out over your thighs, and lando has disappeared beneath the fabric. you can tell he’s there, though, by the strong hands gripping onto your thighs, the tuft of curls peeking out, and the feeling of his nose bumping your clit as he buries his face deeper and deeper between your folds.

“lando.” you cry, throwing your head back. the straps of your dress are slipping down your arms, skimming your goosebump ridden skin. he just groans into your pussy in response, pulling you impossibly closer to his mouth, backwards and forwards until you’re grinding down on his willing tongue. you reach down blindly, grabbing one of his hands where it rests on your thigh, and your other threads through his hair, gripping tight as you revel in the pleasure.

lando pulls your clit between his teeth, grazing over the bud and you’re jolting, writhing above him. you feel like you’re going to die, heat pricking all over your skin, your tummy tight from the building orgasm. he’s so eager, sliding his entire face through your slippery folds, obscene sounds falling from his lips that ricochet through your quivering body.

tears prick your eyes when you finally let go, slumping forwards from the overwhelming sensation taking over every single nerve. he lifts you off of him, laying you back on the bed as you come down from your high.

“you okay, baby?” he coos, brushing sweat dampened hair from your eyes.

his lips are stained, dark pink and shiny, a mixture of enthusiasm and your slick coating them. lando scans your watery eyes, feral at how fucked out you look all because of him, and tantalisingly licks his lips.

“need you.” you moan, reaching out for him. his shirt is wrinkled where he’d slept in it and your shaky hands find the few buttons that are actually done up. you push the material off of his shoulders, pupils blown wide at the sight of his toned chest, at the feel of smooth, golden skin. you pull him in by the shoulders, swallowing him whole as you kiss him with everything you’ve got left.

lando’s hands find your thighs once more, running his hands over them to push your dress up your hips.

“wanted this for so long.” he whispers into the kiss, pulling away so that he can take the dress off of you. he looks ravenous the more he pushes the fabric up your body.

you feel vulnerable under his intense gaze, watchful eyes taking in every movement you make. you try to pull him back in for another kiss but he resists.

“let me look at you, please?” lando asks. “there you go, baby, let’s get this off, hmm?” he sits you up so that he can get it over your head, and you lay back, bare aside from your panties that he’d left in disarray.

he sucks in a breath, raking his eyes over the curve of your lips, your collarbone, the slope of your breasts. his gaze lingers there for just a second, before continuing further over your belly, the length of your legs. you want to hide away, pull him in so that he can’t look at you like this, or just dive under the duvet and stay there until you need to catch your flight.

“god, you’re so, so fucking beautiful.” he gasps, awestruck. he sounds speechless, and you feel yourself going red again.

“come here.” you whine. “needed you for so long.”

your admission seems to kick him into action, because seconds later, he’s on top of you, fingers grazing the band of your underwear while you fiddle with the button on his jeans.

“gonna be good for me, aren’t you?” lando stares you down, tone sending a shiver down your spine. you nod, batting your eyelashes. “words, my love.”

“yes, lando.” you affirm, arching into him. that’s all he needs to know, kicking his jeans away, boxers too.

“good girl. took care of me so well last night, now ‘m gonna take such good care of you.”

your eyes skim his body, honing in on how hard he is. your hand finds his cock, tentative at first, stroking over it softly. it’s heavy in your hands, red and dripping already. he wants this just as bad as you do. you continue to jerk him off, watching the way his eyes squeeze shut and his lips part, soft pants falling out. a low hum sounds from the back of his throat, and you wet your lips, threading your free hand through his hair.

lando opens his eyes at the sensation, gently batting your hand away. he dips down even closer, resting on one of his forearms. he lines himself up and your legs wrap around him instinctively. slowly, he pushes inside of you, his breath catching in his throat.

“fucking hell.” he groans, deep and guttural, something carnal sending shockwaves through his body. “been dreaming about all the ways i’d get to fuck you.”

your eyes roll back and you go languid in his arms, feeling every inch of him slide against your slick walls.

“want you.” you rasp, clinging to him, your fingernails leaving patterns between his taut shoulder blades as you beg for it.

“you have me, baby.” and then he kisses you, messy and slow, stealing the air from your lungs. you’re dizzy when he pulls away, sitting back slightly to change the angle. you cry out, feeling him even deeper and everything is more sensitive, warm. you roll your hips, meeting his thrusts deliciously, and he chokes out a moan as you clamp around him. “yeah, that’s it. fuck yourself like that for me.” he encourages.

this is all too much, too good. you have whiplash, physically and emotionally, eyes pooling with tears as the man you’d wanted so badly that you hated him for it rocks into you. lando hits the right spot every time he pistons his hips harder, and his nimble fingers slide up your abdomen, applying light pressure to your navel that makes you writhe.

“fucking perfect for me. gorgeous.” lando slurs, entranced by the sight of where you’re joined. he can see just how wet you are and it drives him insane, barrelling into you like a man possessed, drunk on every single way that your body responds to him.

his wandering hand finds your breast, kneading it before he traces your nipple. he watches the way it hardens at his manipulation, wetting his lips. he collapses back on top of you, sucking the bud into his mouth. you’re panting, whining beneath him as his tongue swirls over your chest, switching to the other side. you jolt, a silent scream scratching your throat when he slips his hand between your thighs, working your clit with the pad of his thumb. he’s rutting against you, grinding deeper, faster, uncontrollably.

“come on, baby. you’re so close, so tight for me.” he mutters into your skin. you nod frantically, your words lost on you. he kisses over your collarbone, the base of your throat, until he finds your lips.

“so close.” you sigh.

he stops.

“tell me you’re all mine.” lando growls, his entire demeanour changing. the tone of his voice almost finishes you off but you’re suddenly enraged. you’re too close for him to stop.

“c’mon lando.” you hiss, trying to move your hips but he has you firmly in place.

“need to hear you say it.” his hand slithers over your chest, finding a new home at the base of your throat. it makes you throb, the way his thick fingers wrap around you. slowly, his grip tightens, and you see an opportunity.

you buck your hips hard, whimpering at the sensation, but your plan works and now you hover over him. he’s still buried inside you, and you can feel him pulsing as you steal control.

“for once in your life, honey, shut the fuck up.” you smirk, mischievous in victory.

slowly, you build up your rhythm. he feels bigger like this, deeper, and you almost lose yourself in the small circles you make with your hips.

“knew you’d be like this. you liked giving yourself to me but i just knew you’d need to take back control.” lando teases. his hand is back around your neck, squeezing slowly, and you grind frantically, dizzy for him. “i was right last night, wasn’t i, baby? pretending to be my good girl when really,” he pulls you down so that you’re chest to chest. “you’re just a fucking brat.”

lando holds you close as he fucks up into you, feeling the way you go limp on top of him as the pleasure washes over you like a million electric shocks. you’re crying, tears pooling on his chest, because there is nothing you can do, nothing you want to do, but take it. he’s got you right where he wants you, and you’re loving every fucking second of it.

“yeah, baby, take it how you want it.” lando commands through gritted teeth, and you move your hips in a feeble attempt to match his speed. everything is slippery, everything feels wet and flushed.

the power play, the position, the frenzy he seems to be in as he fucks you, it all has you gushing, spilling all over him. you choke out a sob, shuddering as the elastic band in your belly snaps. lando stops his thrusts, replacing them with small rolls of his hips to help you through your orgasm.

a sharp breath and a string of curses from him give you the strength to muster the last little bits of energy you have left to look up at him. you pull your head up off of his chest just in time to watch him shatter into a million little pieces.

his neck flexes as his head rolls back, sinking into the pillow, his eyes tight. swollen lips part and your name falls from between them like a prayer. you can feel him filling you up, his hands tightening their hold on your hips like he’s scared to let go, like the world will stop if he does.

the world stops anyway, because then you’re looking at each other. really looking at each other.

it only takes a second for you to be drawn in and his hands leave your hips to cup your face. his calloused hands feel your skin, stroking over rosy patches on your cheeks. it’s deathly silent all around you, apart from the breathless pants you share.

swollen lips crash hard into yours and you melt. he’s still buried so deeply inside of you, your hips digging into his, impossibly close. you’re blindly reaching for any part of him you can get your hands on, and his big hands slide down your body until they meet the small of your back. ever so carefully, he flips you onto your back, easing your spent body into the mattress.

lando collapses on top of you, mouthes at your neck for a moment, delicate kisses making your eyes flutter shut. the eye contact almost sends you into cardiac arrest as he pulls out, oh so slowly. tease.

he holds you close in the shower, fingers massaging every part of you. sex and sweat are washed away, almost lovingly. you let the water run for far too long, content in clinging to him. it’s quiet, reflective time for both of you, exactly what it needs to be. you’re both hung up on questions that need to be asked, neither one of you brave enough to take the first steps. you know one thing, and one thing only: something has changed, in a forever kind of way.

your hair is stringy, half dry, and you’re stood in your underwear. your legs are still shaky.

“your flight soon?” lando asks. he’s stood in his boxers on the other side of the room, scrunching the water out of his curls.

“yeah.” your throat feels raw.

“and you’re going back to monaco?” he’s stopped what he’s doing now, staring at you. you can see the cogs turning behind his eyes.

you nod.

“fancy a sleepover?” he grins, boyish and careless. your heart falls to your feet.

you’re giggling when he sweeps you into his arms and kisses you into the freshly made bed. the sheets are on the floor by the time you finally remember you have a flight to catch.

you’re his now, you realise. he’s too beautiful for his own damn good.

-

“baby?” you hear lando call from his bedroom. you make out the faint sound of his footsteps making their way in your direction. he appears before you can even answer him, and he’s smiling softly at the sight of you bundled up in a blanket, sprawled across his couch.

“what is it?” you ask. the next thing you know he’s on top of you, peppering kisses over every single inch of skin he can get to on your face. “hey, get off, muppet.” you whine playfully, ruffling his hair.

“do you know how much i love having you here?” he murmurs. it’s endearing as fuck and you fight a foolish, dopey grin.

“you’ve mentioned once or twice…” you’ve been here since your flight touched down a week ago. you haven’t even been home to get clothes, not that you needed them in his company.

“we might have a teeny, tiny issue.” he squints, pulling a face.

“and what’s that?” you ask, your voice measuring equal parts cautious and amused.

“so, alex called…”

“oh, shit.”

“we have to go to dinner tonight.”

“we have to?”

“he’s suspicious as fuck. you do realise they’ve been plotting for us to happen for years,” you roll your eyes as if you say duh. “and also, you’ve been in monaco for a week and haven’t seen him once. oh, and also, the last time we saw them, we were running away from a fucking crime scene.” lando smiles sarcastically, and you sigh, defeated.

before you can reply, your phone is ringing somewhere beside you. you root around in your blanket searching for it and when you find it:

“son of a bitch.” you exclaim, showing lando the caller ID. alex is one persistent motherfucker.

“hey girl.” alex singsongs down the phone before you can even say hello.

“hello to you too.” you can hear the fear in your own voice.

“dinner. tonight. although, i’m sure lando already told you.” alex teases.

“why would lando have told me? what?” you choke. lando slaps his hand over his face. your voice has gone up several octaves. not suspicious at all.

“so, you’re at home? you haven’t been at his place since last week?” the playful interrogation begins.

“why would i be with lando?” you try and feign disgust at the implication. it does not work.

“because you hate fucked after he beat up that perv? i have to say, i didn’t think he had it in him but he’s been in love with you since he was like, ten, so, you know-”

“bye alex.”’

“you’re not denying it-“

“bye alex!”

you’re flaming red when you throw the phone to the other end of the sofa. lando, as on brand as ever, is cackling into a pillow.

“he is such a fucking shit stirrer.” you bury your face in your hands, slumping back into the fuzzy cushions.

“well, he’s right about one thing.” lando trails off. suddenly he’s looking anywhere but you and you see him gulp, hard, swallowing his words, like he’s too afraid to bare his soul.

“huh?” you ask gently, sitting up to reach out for him. “what’s wrong?”

“we need to get ready for dinner. that’s what he’s right about.” lando says, standing from the sofa and walking towards his room. you’re suspicious, watching him go with furrowed eyebrows.

-

“lando, behave! you’re the one making me go to this dinner.” you squeal, batting his restless hands away.

you’ve made it as far as the elevator before he pounces on you, caging you in against the metal walls.

“but you look so good, can’t help myself.” he mutters between kisses on your neck, pressing himself even further into you.

the hand that finds it’s way between your legs, exploring beyond the hem of your skirt, is the one that makes you press the button for his floor. why have plans when you can have sex?

he gets through the door to his apartment at lighting speed and carries you all the way to his bed.

when you’re sweating and breathless a good hour later, half of the bedding on the floor with your clothes, you realise you never cancelled your plans.

lando is drawing shapes into the bare skin of your arm, kissing over your shoulder as he does so. his eyes are dropping from all of the over-exertion and you want to count each and every freckle on his face while he falls asleep. he’s cute like this, soft and yours.

and idea comes to your mind, and as if he can see the lightbulb, lando half raises an eyebrow at you. you giggle, somewhat evilly perhaps, and scramble for your phone on the beside table.

“what’re you doing?” lando groans, pouting as his outstretched arms try to find you.

“getting even.” you state.

with the phone in your clutches, you roll back over towards him, holding the camera above you both. he hears the shutter sound as you snap the picture, and peers closer to see the screen. when he sees the groupchat open, he quickly understands what you’re plotting.

“may i?” you ask for his consent.

“are you kidding? go for it. that’ll shut them up.” he laughs sleepily, muttering something about how this is the most lando thing you’ve ever done

FROM: you

TO: the groupchat

1 image attached

couldn’t make dinner. something came up xx

“alex always thinks he’s right, this’ll teach him for being such a little shit.” you flop back into bed even more satisfied than you were before.

you hear lando inhale shakily beside you.

“he is right sometimes you know.” he repeats his earlier words.

you hold your breath. his eyes say so many things that are too delicate to be spoken yet.

“like… like what he said on the phone?” your voice quivers with anticipation, fear. your heart is thunderous, hammering away like it wants to escape the clutches of its cage.

“yeah. i-“ he stops himself. you don’t need him to finish, you know which two words follow. they can follow in good time, you both know it.

“me too, lando.” you coo.

he’s beaming, eyes half shut. you watch as he falls asleep, the both of you ignoring the way your phones are vibrating so aggressively that they might buzz their way off of the night stand. you lose count of his freckles, but it doesn’t matter.

you’ll have plenty of time to figure it out.

-

let me know what you think :D

-

taglist

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[tomsparkyr]

LYM Masterlist

"If you are so good at losing your memory... Then why won't you forget about me too?"

The boy you knew—the boy you loved before the 10th Hunger Games began—returns to the Capitol. The Plinth heir. The victor. You don't know the man he has become... or do you? Because, surprisingly, he only seems to be holding on to one thing from his past. You. And as much as you hate him, you can't deny that there's nothing more between you two. Something just doesn't let you forget about yourselves as effortlessly as you would want to.

Coriolanus Snow's Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~ Main Masterlist

1. Losing your memory

He used to be your Coryo. Now he has become the man you don't know. The Plinth heir. The future president of Panem. You pray every day to forget about the sweet boy you fell in love with, on whom you could always count. To forget who he was and lose the memory of the past. Just like he did. Well... not exactly. Unfortunately for you, he still wants to remember you.

2. The grudge

You promised you would destroy him. Be his ending at all costs. The fight between you begins. Both about his position as President of Panem and about the feelings you still have for him. But the question still haunts you... is your Coryo really gone?

3. Marry me (unless you don't want to)

It's been a few years since you won the election for president of Panem. Your fiancé Coryo gives you many advices and is your support most of the time... but it doesn't take much for your pre-wedding idyll to turn into living hell. Can you stop it? Or maybe power is what matters most for both you and Coriolanus...