thegreentmix-bybelle

[thegreentmix-bybelle]

YOU version 2.0 : Letting God Build You

We all want something. We want to be productive, we want to improve our relationship with friends and family members, and overall quality of our lives. Even though I still struggle to be consistent with everything I mentioned above, I still want to share what I have learned through the word of God and the endless battle with myself.

To improve productivity, I go by the quote “Do not be moved by your feelings, but be moved by your commitment.” This is a powerful quotation that stuck with me for the longest time. Basically, our emotions are not predictable, it constantly changes (Jeremiah 17:9) Therefore, our emotions cannot be trusted. We don’t do certain activities because we don’t “feel” like doing it and that should not be. Mauro Malang Santos, a Filipino painter and cartoonist, dropped out of formal education to pursue fine arts. According to Pastor Bong Saquing, during his preaching, that the secret of the well-known Filipino artist is that he did not let his mood dictate what he is going to do. Paint whether you feel it or not, study whether you feel it or not, pray whether you feel it or not. It is not forcing ourselves to do what we don’t want to do, but choosing to discipline ourselves (Proverbs 14:5), choosing what we want the most over what we want now (1 Corinthians 9:26-27). We all desire for our success story, our time to shine among the stars, however, we cannot continue with old ineffective ways. We can’t dream big and do nothing, we don’t get to be successful by simply being on our phones all day and not start anything. 

Next, improving our relationship with family and friends, which based on my experience takes a whole lot of patience and understanding, but the greatest thing that binds a relationship together is love (Colossians 3:12-14, 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8) Relationships are between people, and humans are flawed, therefore, aspects of one’s relationship with someone will be flawed. As the term use today, people will always have something “Toxic” about them, but despite it let us choose to love others because when we do patience, kindness and understanding will follow. A great act of love is correcting someone (Proverbs 19:20) address someone’s toxic behavior/ attitude. One example would be the bible, to some people being corrected is a slap in the face. People do not want to be corrected and the bible is full of corrections that’s why some repels from it, but what the word of God truly does is show love, because when we correct someone it shows that we care and that we want the best for them. Also take note, that friends come and go, when God removes someone from your life, when a friend suddenly cuts you off and leaves you, it’s ok, maybe God has other plans for them and for you, but the last thing you could ever lose is family. 

To tie all things together, improving our overall quality of life is by finding happiness in gratitude. In the midst of trials in life let us choose to think positive and be thankful (Jonah 2: 9-10), even the simplest things in life, being alive, having something to eat/drink, starting and or finishing something. It is easier said than done, but by practicing to be grateful, focusing on our blessings each day, we’ll eventually take us in a state of our lives where there is peace and happiness, which I believe is what one truly desires. (Psalms 100:4)

Photos by Even After Weddings and Portraits -https://web.facebook.com/EAweddingsandportraits 

Undefined Conference 2020 | Emotions: Don't Let Them Destroy You - Pastor Bong Saquing - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQhG8sWeqs0&t=2456s 

#midterm productivity relationships life

[thegreentmix-bybelle]

INSIDE by Belle

I feel cold and itchy as I realized I was laying on grass I gently open my eyes, beaming at me, the sunlight that sneaks in the leaves of a lustrous tree . I gently got up and surveyed the surrounding. The greenery sparkled and the water lie smooth and serene, the sudden pleasure of tranquility hits me and my chaotic mind was left with no thoughts. Before I could step forward out of nowhere a girl was in front of me, she had round, brown eyes and fair skin, her hair was straight and long, she wore a white dress with fabric fairly loose hanging from her shoulders. “What are you doing here?” she asked directly looking at me, eagerly waiting for my response with her hands at the back. I was hesitant to answer, she might not grasp it and might feel bad as well. But regardless I had to say something, “I was sent here,” I said calmly as I could “Oh I see, well, you’re always welcome to come here.” The girl replied with a cheerful tone. She held my hand and we walked north, I didn’t know where we were going, but she was leading the way and she began to tell me stories of her, some where interesting and funny, she shared her dreams and ambitions that’s filled with hope and determination. 

The sun doesn’t seem to sleep, we were walking for hours now, but the sky is still blue and white, and the feel of the wind is cold yet the afternoon warmth of the sun comforts me. For a moment there was silence, I don’t hear any voices. A flash of panic came, my eyes widened and immediately turned my head to the side. “Where is she?” I asked myself. She was gone. From a distance I saw someone, another one of them. Similar features and clothes of the first girl I met but she was slightly bigger, instead of a child a teenager. I came closer to her, she looked at me with a smile and we exchanged hello’s. “How have you been?” she added. How have I been? It’s been awhile since anyone has asked me that, again, I didn’t know what to answer. We walked for a while, as she talked, I sense a different aura from her, she was full of life and energy, she was free spirited. I wanted to be like her.

Finally, the moon has shown itself. I am left alone. I began to stare at my bare feet, the chaotic voice has creeped in once more, the voice of frustration, guilt and regret echos throughout my mind. I clenched my fists and closed my eyes, I couldn’t breath, I tried to relax but this ghost-quiet place, reminds me of everything I want to forget. Suddenly, I heard crying noises, curious, I followed the sound which led me to the third person I’ve met today. She was crouched down, her trembling hands covering her face as a great sob escaped. The cry was familiar. She stood up and grabbed me by the shoulders. She screamed at me, uttered awful words to me, explained how toxic of a human I am and how I don’t deserve anyone. Her nails was digging into my skin and so I pushed her. I ran and she chased me until day break. “I’m exhausted” I said as I reach with both my hands up to the sky

“Why are you here?” I heard a voice, that was mine

“To punish myself, hurt myself…But I want to stop”

“Then let me help you.” I answered back to myself

#photoblog #shortstory #selflove #selfhate

[thegreentmix-bybelle]

Stuck in a grey area: Goals and Ambitions

Back when I was in elementary I can remember activities asking us to draw what we want to be when we grow up, and similar to my female classmates most of us drew a girl character wearing a white uniform from top to bottom, inside the hospital attending two or three patients. The setting was always the same, I told the class I wanted to be a nurse without really knowing why and how it took to get there. As I grew older, I wanted to be a flight attendant. Seeing my mom sit for 9 hours a day, encoding, I knew I did not want an ordinary office life, and for the longest time my dream to get paid as I travel the world remained.  Until I got to my Junior year, there was a sudden longing for the arts, acting in particular. Similar to Katy Perry’s 2008 hit single “Hot n Cold” lyrics, I changed my mind like how a girl changes clothes. Now, as college seemed to get closer, I wanted to enroll in Theater Arts or to pause my studies and try to enter the industry by auditioning in the hopes to be casted one day. In my perspective, my goal was clear, however, my mom opposed to the idea, although I’m not certain if it was the idea of her daughter acting or stopping school, my dad on the other hand supported me and just wanted me to be happy. It’s a struggle, conflicted to either obey or to disobey. In conclusion, I stayed at school, finished Junior year, With honors and pursued Senior year, but I was stuck in a grey area.  At some point in my life I wanted to be a Karate teacher, an ophthalmologist, a psychiatrist, a professional dancer, and or a business woman. Similar to many students struggle with I have many ambitions and goals in life that sometimes instead of being led to enlightenment it let me to be confused, overwhelmed, and clueless on what to do with my life. Today, I am fortunate to have a clear plan. I know what I want to do and how to possibly achieve it. Although my dream and next step towards it is to remain unsaid, I can share that the first phase of my plan is to enter a University and course suited for me, and I am blessed to be in a position where I am happy. I may not have everything worked out for now, overall, I can picture myself at the altar, testifying my success story, and how by God’s strength made it all possible for me. 

#goals ambitions Godsplan