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bioluminosity · 2 months
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I understand, now, why god would raze the world and start anew.
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crystalflygeo · 1 year
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Surrogate eggs ft Zhongli + fem!reader
cw/tags: Egg-laying/Oviposition, semi-plublic sex, multiple orgasms, slight fingering, overstimulation, dirty talk, breeding kink, Zhongli has a dragon tongue, praise kink, sex toys??, improper use of geo (can you tell I love that tag?), pet names, some pain??, aftercare.
notes: I disappear for a week and come back with this absolute FILTH omg. It really is just almost 2k of egg-laying made sexy because I am a degenerate and want nothing more than Zhongli filling me up with eggs <3 sorry not sorry.
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Having a 6000 years old dragon ex-god as a lover sure meant you were already more or less used to a certain… spice in your life.
But this, this was certainly new.
“Ah- Zhong- Hnnhg!”
Your legs tremble as a newborn fawn as you stray off the main path and lean against one of the golden ginkgo trees by the side, panting and whining softly.
“Are you alright dear? You look quite flustered.” Zhongli curiously trails after you, hands behind his back, perfectly poised. As if he wasn’t the one making the cor lapis eggs in your pussy vibrate and tease your insides. “Do you need to rest? We’ve barely reached the base of Qingyun peak.” He asks, an amused smile on his lips.
“B-bastard.” You huff out with a pout and immediately feel the vibrations intensify. “O-Oh… fuck-”
Three. Three small polished cor lapis pieces in the shape of eggs, warm and snug and deep inside you. They shift and rub against your sweet spots, pulsing at his will ever since you stepped foot in Jueyun Karst, at first it was an odd sensation but soon enough your panties were soaked, juices running down your legs as you struggled to keep standing, sweet noises coming out of your mouth that only made Zhongli’s gaze darken.
“Zhongli…” You cry out.
“Yes, darling?”
“S-stop… mmh”
“Oh? But you seem to be enjoying yourself so much.”
“Stop… playing dumb.” You grit your teeth, clinging to the tree for dear life. The vibrations calming down to a soft hum, a gentle fucking not unlike his cock. “Please I’m-” You whine again.
You feel his finger softly raise your chin and your hazy half-lidded eyes were met with glittering gold, his diamond pupils mesmerizing and his stare soft and affectionate but also domineering, commanding, and full of lust.
“What do you need, my dear? Tell me.”
You choke a moan at his authoritarian presence, shifting and rubbing your legs together as the pleasure robs you of your strength. “P-please… Zhongli, make me come, please I n-need- It’s not… enough.”  
His eyes shift to the side as he seems to consider it for a moment and you almost mewl for his attention, eyebrows knitting together trying to steel yourself.
“Alright.” He concedes, and leans forward to kiss you softly.
Well, at first.
The geo eggs inside you start to shake and vibrate more intensely and you gasp at the sudden rush of stimulation, Zhongli holds you and pulls you closer, taking the chance to snake his long dragon tongue into your mouth, quickly deepening the kiss and set on devouring you.  
“Hmpnnng-” He swallows your moan as you kiss back the best way you can but it’s suddenly so much- too much- you’ve been teased and edged all the way and he’s- he’s just-
Your body shudders in his arms and you let out a high-pitched noise as you climax. Your insides squeezing and milking the toys inside you, dragging on the pleasure for longer and you cling onto him as your legs threaten to give up. Bliss, pure bliss. And he hasn’t even touched you proper yet.
“There we go…” His rough voice mumbles as he breaks apart the filthy kiss, his hands rub at your hips and you vaguely realize the geo eggs have stopped again. He carefully maneuvers your pliant body until you’re both sitting on the yellowed Liyue grass, his back resting against the tree while you sit between his legs, your back pressed to his chest.
He spreads your legs and holds them open with his own, you blush heavily as you realize his intentions, hiking up your skirt to reveal soft thighs and wet panties to the world. The flimsy fabric is soaked and clings uncomfortably against your pussy, more so as you feel the soft breeze.
“W-wait… right here?”
It is true that barely anyone ever enters Jueyun Karst but it was still risky. A lost adventurer, a lone merchant… you weren’t that far from the main dirt path, anyone could walk in and see you… exposed like this.
Your insides clenched, throbbing around nothing but the eggs inside of you.
Archons you really were depraved.
Zhongli rubs your inner thighs comfortingly before pulling your panties aside, his long gloved fingers skim your heated pussy lips and rub at your hole as it twitches wildly in response.
“Zhongli…” You moan weakly. “I’m so full.”
“I know, you look so pretty with my eggs inside you. Breathtaking.” His other hand rubs circles on your navel. The warmth within the geo energy sent through him spreading heat in a sensual way. “How about you push them out for me and we can be done. I’ll take you home so you can rest, my precious mate.” He nuzzles you.
“W-wha…” You mumble dumbly, but instinctively lean to his touch.
“They’ve been inside you long enough, and… we’ve had our fun.” He explains, kissing at your jaw. Two of his fingers easily sliding inside you, making you jump. “Don’t you think it’s time to let them out? I want to see you lay them.”
Pressure builds in your gut and you nod, biting your lip. Her works those sinful fingers in and out of your pussy slowly, scissoring them to stretch you a little and you moan. Not that you needed that much preparation with the recent orgasm and your… activities early that morning.
After all, those eggs had gotten in somehow, hadn’t they?
Only a few moments later and you feel ready, panting rapidly as if you truly were going into labor yet at the brink of another orgasm, you weakly pulled his hand away “H-Hold me…” You mutter heatedly. Zhongli kisses you softly and you take a deep breath.
And push.
The first egg slides down freely inside you, rapidly moving until it catches at your entrance, it burns a little but feels so good, lightning up pleasured nerves in a way that had you mewling before the stretch disappears, coming out alongside your spilling juices and onto the grass.   
Zhongli doesn’t hesitate to slip his fingers back into your heated core to soothe the sore muscles and play with your pussy a bit more, rubbing over your raw clit to make your hips stutter and your legs shake trying to close.
“That’s the first one, two more.” He says softly, his chin resting on your shoulder as he obviously stares between your legs entranced. You flush at his actions. “You can do it.” He encourages you, elegant fingers spreading your folds lewdly and soaking in your essences.
The whole experience is making you dizzy.
“I-I just… I just need a moment.” You pant, groaning and shifting your position a little so you’re less sitting and more lying against him, lifting your hips slightly and offering him an even better view from above.
“Just imagine the real thing. There will be more of them, slightly bigger and thrumming with elemental energy.” He growled softly against your ear. “Our children. Our clutch.”
It’s just dirty talk. It’s just dirty talk and it sets your blood on fire to hear it. You know his base draconic instincts are going haywire with the idea and archons you want that. You want that so badly.
Another egg stretches your hole and you can only imagine what it looks like as it slips and spreads you open. “Ah- Ah!” You toss your head back, let out a long moan and strain the muscles of your stomach before finally it slips out.
“Good girl.” Comes his smooth baritone in the form of a praise. You sigh in relief, rutting against his fingers as reward. You see slick threads of your juices all over on his gloves, the shiny eggs and your pussy, connecting everything together in a mess of a shiny cobweb. It’s obscene.
It’s so hot.
“Just one more, darling.” The ex-archon soothes you, possessively rubbing at your navel once again although you feel something’s different, like something shifts a little inside you. “Though, I feel this one is just a little bigger… closer to the real thing.”
Your eyes widen.
“No, no, no, you did it on purpose… just now… m-make it smaller again, please!” You shake your head frantically, digging your nails against his arms and squirming against the feeling of his fingertips dancing around your folds.
“Shhh, shhh” He cooed, kissing at your neck. “You can do it, I know you can. Consider it… practice.” You can practically feel the smirk Zhongli presses against your skin.
“I already came so much…” You whisper, tears in your eyes. “Zhongliiii…”
“You got this.” He kisses your temple. “Just one more. I want to see that sweet pussy stretch around my egg, please?”
You groan at his filthy words, hips snapping against phantom stimulation as your pussy quivers. You brace yourself and breathe in deeply before squeezing your eyes shut and doing your best to push against the overstimulation. Your hole stretches impossibly wide, widening against the grit of the egg and pressing against your clit making you keen. It rests there a few seconds, heavy, solid, before finally popping out with a wet squelch, dropping right by the other two, and you scream at the excruciating mix of pain and pleasure.
For a moment you can’t even breathe, much less speak as you rest a little. Black spots dance in your vision and your ears are ringing. When you come to again Zhongli is desperately peppering you with kisses, caresses and praise. Hugging you close and growling dark promises into your skin.
“-did so well. My little mate. My perfect mate. Want to breed you for real. Fill you up. You’d give me wonderful little half adepti. So good for me. Truly worthy to be a dragon’s mate. Should keep you in my nest. Love you so much-”      
Sluggish, you close your legs and pull down your skirt clumsily, ignoring the soreness and sticky feeling as your body sags against him in exhaustion.    
The dragon is practically purring, having mellowed down a little yet obviously pleased after having you bear his eggs, albeit fake ones. The intention is there… as well as the possibility for the future.
“We should go to the abode, you deserve a good rest. I’ll clean you up and get you something to eat and drink, hm?”
“Just a little more, Li.” You mumble tired. “It’s warm and cozy here…”
He chuckles and pets your hair. “Alright.”
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rivennell · 2 years
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late happy mermay (?)
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lovesickeros · 1 year
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ive been thinking about what characters would know sign language, bc despite never being mentioned i can't imagine teyvat wouldn't have an equivalent version.
alhaitham (partially deaf/goes nonverbal) obviously and by extension kaveh (kinda hard to chew out your roommate when they cant understand you), but also collei (goes nonverbal when triggered) would have been taught by tighnari (who knows it bc its useful for communicating silently w other rangers)
#sagau#genshin sagau#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin#self aware genshin impact#alhaitham#tighnari#kaveh#collei#albedo absolutely knows it as well (he taught klee when she saw him signing one day and thought it was neat)#klee signs when shes really excited bc she knows if she starts talking no one will understand her bc shes talking too fast#amber knows it (similar reasoning to tighnari but she also works w kids a lot. probably taught collei a bit of sl during her time in mond)#cyno (same reason as tighnari + amber and again. helps 2 communicate w collei)#diluc & kaeya know it (they learned it as kids and thought it was super cool. used it like a super secret language between the two of them)#diluc uses it more practically now but still goes nonverbal sometimes and kaeya just Knows and immediately switches to sl too#lisa + by extension razor (lisa would have prob learned it in sumeru like alhaitham and is trying to teach it to razor)#mostly to fill in gaps of words hes doesnt know yet. so if he wants to ask for something but doesnt know the word he can sign it instead#childe. which may be surprising. taught by skirk probably but only barely. just enough to get his point across when he goes nonverbal#bc hes absolutely traumatized by his time in the abyss and is not handling it well!!#honorable mentions r ei + miko + zl#yoimiya + yelan + yanfei#baizhu + noelle#me?? projecting onto the characters by making half of them go nonverbal for x reason????? yeah :)#if u see me adding tags look away!!!#n e way do you think there would be different versions of sl for each nation bc........#i mean teyvat only has one universal spoken language (paimon mentions it bc traveler had to learn it)#so would there even be multiple sign languages?????#maybe bc asl + bsl are different but.
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doefrost · 6 months
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seven nintendo three dee esses for the little lady. and put "super monkey ball" on all of them,
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saga-jihen · 7 months
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Crossover fanart of Sakura Minamoto with R. Ichirou Tanaka from the classic series, Kyuukyoku Choujin R, illustrated by Michirou Ueyama. Ueyama is the mangaka behind series like Tsumanuda Fight Town, Age ‘87, Zoids: Chaotic Century, and his most recent work  Akuyaku Reijou Tensei Ojisan ( Middle-Aged Man Reincarnated as a Villainess. )
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salsflore · 7 months
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been almost 3 yrs and i am still struggling with the whole mikachi first meeting thing. bye
#for zl its something simple. i just saw cute fanart of it with another ship [ p sure it was someones 2 ocs ] and enjoyed the idea#i lost my black umbrella irl but tbf it doesnt really matter because i always fucking forget to bring it anyways. so sometimes i get caught#in the rain. so idk zl lends me his umbrella bc. fuck! heading in the same direction and is like hey loser . . let me help you . .#cue immediate heart eyes bc handsome stranger helped her. like Wow Yuo Are So Cool... ♡#afterwards she mentions this interaction to her friend [ yun jin or hu tao .. unsure but they are both so silly so its hard 2 decide ] and#then they are like wait i know that grandpa you're talking about! let me set you up lalala theres this whole thing i'm lazy#i'll write about it Maybe bc i do want to write for my platonic f/os. and also cover all the [ firsts ] in my self ships#its just: i don't like feeling obligated to stick to things (like a series or theme or whatever) so maybe not. would be nice though..#nobody in this world is allowed to laugh at me i'll die#as for childe my plan was he breaks into her house and then shes like wtf who r u?!! they make eye contact and kiss + get married asap#no actually i truly dont know. zl's is slightly easier because he lives a mortal life. just chills#has connections with a lot of the liyue chars. literally just enjoying his retirement era now#ajax doesn't have many connections ( other harbingers but they dgaf about each other i think x ) and i just cant imagine that. idk#just fucking. bumping into him would lead to anything. maybe i should turn into a fish and have him fish me up and then i transform into a#girl and then we fall in love what do you guys think (losing my grip on humanity)#💭#mika ♡ ajax#mika ♡ zhongli
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goldensunset · 2 years
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some sort of neo twewy tag/ask game or whatever i guess (feel free to skip a question if you don’t have an answer btw! just say whatever you like!)
•favorite new character?
•favorite returning character?
•favorite new song?
•returning old song that you think was most improved?
•returning old song that you think was done the dirtiest?
•song from the original that you wish had returned?
•menu theme?
•dive/boss battle that you struggled the most on?
•type of noise that you would send straight to hell no questions asked?
•type of noise from the original that you wish had returned?
•if you mostly kept each character mapped to the same button for the entire game, who was on which one?
•if you put minamimoto back into your party in postgame, whose spot did he take?
•favorite scene?
•chapter that felt like a drag?
•which plot twists did you see coming, and how early on?
•did you get all the secret reports/ending?
•if you could have any character’s special psych irl, which would you choose?
#neo the world ends with you#ntwewy#i love talking about stuff and i love hearing other people talk about stuff#some of these are at least partial repeats of old posts#but whatever#mine: twewy#subaseka tag#ok my fave new character is shoka and my fave returning character is beat surprise surprise#fav song is scramble but i can’t tell if that counts as a new one or a remix of shadow lol#owari hajimari was most improved imo i could never stand that song until neo#i also never liked make or break until neo#((i still hate the one star))#someday got done so dirty i’m sorry i don’t like the reworked instrumental and the vocals are grating#deja vu should’ve returned smh what is this!!!!#my menu theme currently is shibuya survivor i think but in the past it’s been scramble and revelation at times#leo cantus armo gave me so much grief my goodness. also ryoji’s dive battle was a NIGHTMARE even on easy#iguanas can die. ((ok i know they’re actually chameleons whatever))#i think kangaroos in 3D would’ve been fun and also terrifying#rindo: X. fret: Y. nagi: L. beat: ZL. shoka: ZR. neku/minamimoto: R.#which also answers my next question. ily neku but minamimoto is way more interesting#hhgnh i can’t even pick a fav scene i love late week 2 i love that fret and nagi scene in week 3 i love that haz and rindo scene ough#i think week 1 day 5 was too long lol (the first scramble slam)#uhmmm i’m Dumb so i didn’t see much of anything coming#i had my suspicions that neku was actually beat#as well as some minor stuff such as tsugumi having been the one to send those visions to both neku and rindo#cus they used the exact same filter effect in twewy a new day and they used that filter in tsugumi’s fight#no lol i’m pathetic#remind for sure all the others are cool but they’d get me arrested or something#this is a lot of tags i know i’m sorry
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polandspringz · 2 years
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People who slept on Phantom of the Idol because it didn’t have a high budget, I’m being absolutely HONEST when I say I enjoyed it AS MUCH as when I watched Zombieland Saga the first time
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MORNING SAGA!! <3 (bc i said i’d post these) 
s2 ep1! They all got jobs! is this legal? www 
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(i couldnt get a great shot of Junko TT sorry)
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(un tl’d but Lily said “Okaeriri ~” pun of her name and “welcome back” btw w)
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(i love that they used their literal Best album’s cover for this haha)
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(First new song yay!! <3 pls pls give them more TT)
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i am crying TT <3 
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kurooo-is-here · 4 months
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How to get Shiny Applin without picnic resets or an outbreak
(Kudos to @shiny-kaibernyte for showing me this method, thank you!!)
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What you need:
Turn OFF auto-save in your game settings
Any two Herba Mysticas (for the sandwich)
A tall Pokemon (I used Koraidon, but anything around that height works!)
Step 1: Head to Tagtree Thicket
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It's along the fence of the Poison Crew's Base! Look for the two painted trees right next to the Poison Crew's Base icon on the map. Then stand about where my player is in the image below:
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Step 2: Save the game
Make sure you have auto-save OFF!! This way you can close the game and reset to your last save if you don't get a shiny Applin and your sandwich effects run out. You will KEEP the Herba Mysticas you used if you save BEFORE making the sandwich.
Step 3: Make the sandwich
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Follow the image guide above and make the Dragon Type sandwich. Do NOT save the game after making the sandwich.
Step 4: Kill those Applins!
From where you're standing, Applin will start to spawn in the painted tree across from you. Lock onto it with ZL and auto-battle it with Koraidon (or your tall Pokemon of choice). If you did it right, you'll notice that Applin just... keeps spawning in that one spot. Koraidon will stay in its spot and keep defeating the Applins over and over as long as they keep spawning in.
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You may need to redirect Koraidon back to the Applins sometimes. Just lock on with ZL and press R. Now sit back, relax, and wait for your Shiny Applin to appear! Your Pokemon will not defeat shiny Pokemon, so if Koraidon ignores the Applin and you see a green apple in the tree, that's your cue.
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da-mous · 6 months
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enjoying smb wonder but I have so many tiny nitpicks? they don't kill the game by any means but like
-only one run button, so you can't hold one and press the other to swing the elephant trunk and shoot fireballs and such without losing speed. I was literally drafting a devblog post praising the ability to do that in Mario Maker a few days ago dhgdhdgd. I get that X is the emote button but damn
-just pressing jump while airborne and touching a wall isn't enough to perform a wall jump. you have to push into the wall to enter the wallslide state first. I don't remember if this is the case in other Marios, or maybe Celeste has just spoiled me, but it's tripped me up a few times and seems unnecessary!
-the spin jump makes no sense cause like. no matter how long you press the button it's always the same height as a full normal jump. I guess this is because it can be motion controlled? I keep pressing ZR trying to get a low jump like in Mario Maker but I get the opposite instead. beyond that it also just generally seems to have next to no utility unless you really wanna do an entire full height jump to kill a koopa without getting the shell for some reason
-no triple jump? I mean I guess a thing similar to it is a badge now but. why. they coulda done a cute rising pitch thing with the jump sfx. maybe even a full chord on the final jump. woulda sounded so nice!
-speaking of which, the spin double jump badge is best badge easy (why even use half the badges that give extra height through other means when this one does it best), but it also misses the opportunity to do a rising pitch thing with the jump sfx. idk maybe they tried it and it sounded annoying or something. just weird for the first jump to make a musical sound and the second to do something different entirely
-the emote and item reserve buttons (X and A) do nothing if pressed while the run button is held. why??
-R and ZR both spin jump. Nice. ZL ground pounds and crouches. ok nice. L does... I think it does nothing at all? why? maybe I'm missing something?
-feels like the same few music tracks get reused a lot
-there's like one level with climbable poles, and you can jump off of them as expected, but pressing spin jump does nothing. "why would you ever want to do that?? why do you care about this cass??" because uhhhhhhhhh
-I love the concept of the vine grapple badge but it feels slow and jankass to use
-I always try to let go of dash panels or drop out from ceilings I'm drilling into by releasing the jump button, but you actually have to press jump. pressing jump to go down is really counterintuitive!!
-however, pressing jump does not drop you down when hanging from a horizontal pole (a mechanic in a level or two). to do that you have to press down... and then hold it for a short time..? why can't I drop down right away? "cass it's like one level???" ok yeah but you can't spin jump out of a hang either!!! what about that!!!
-ok lastly I don't get the point of elephant mario. being big isn't really an interesting ability and the melee attack is nothing new. the water spraying doesn't add much either because even if the stage you're in does happen to have water it's not a particularly good projectile. it's mainly only useful to water withered plant dudes. a key for a lock
......anyways hdgdhsgdgs game good I'm just surprised at how many tiny things feel off. maybe this is just what happens when the small details on a game are your whole job for several months lol
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saga-jihen · 7 months
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Crossover fanart of Kotaro Tatsumi with another character never seen without his sunglasses, Akira Tosaka, from the classic series, Kyuukyoku Choujin R, illustrated by Michirou Ueyama. Ueyama is the mangaka behind series like Tsumanuda Fight Town, Age ‘87, Zoids: Chaotic Century, and his most recent work  Akuyaku Reijou Tensei Ojisan ( Middle-Aged Man Reincarnated as a Villainess. )
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welcometoteyvat · 3 months
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zhongli + 12 & 20
ty for the ask anon!! <3 :D
prompts
12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?
he had an extensive conversation with rukkhadevata about phylogeny and then mythology, and named azhdaha after her word for dragon. his branched tail reminded him of that discussion. not strictly mine but adopted from an incredible fic (rezhong. please read it. i'm begging)
also some liyue poems used to have a melody/tune with them, so you can turn them into songs (guizhong sometimes wrote simple melodies for poems she heard among her people). nobody really remembers the tune now besides zhongli and ping
20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?
contestants include azhdaha venti and xianyun/cloud retainer but i'll go w venti bc rock and wind sky and earth dichotomy is real (they're enriching each other in a little terrarium rn)
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kalofi · 7 months
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zl fic idea
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hii everyone i wrote something yesterday about an au idea i had for zolu and. i thought i'd share it here since its a bit too messy and disjointed in places to post on like. ao3 or something.
4.7k words, warning for temporary major character death but do not worry all will be fixed in due time. i'll put the rest under the cut
ok i have an idea for an au thats like kind of reincarnation but like reality displacement but like. okay just listen.
so we start at laughtale. its a couple years into the future from where we are in canon the strawhats are achieving their dreams luffy is about to find the one piece theres a big battle happening between them and the blackbeard pirates and whoever the fuck else is there idc. the rest of the strawhats are fighting the bb crew while luffy and zoro head off to find the one piece and also end up fighting black beard himself. luffy and zoro atp r like basically a thing but they never talk about it cuz theyre luffy and zoro and they kind of just exist with each other but like. theyre basically in love and everyone knows it. anyway they go off together luffy has the one piece almost in his grasp blackbeard attacks they fight its a big battle blood is shed bones are broken uumm in my mind luffy and zoro are like teaming up against bb bc his devil fruit is lowk broken and op and like ok theres gear5 too but i didnt rly consider that so lets just assume bb’s devil fruit can negate gear5 somehow or luffy exhausts it before bb is fully defeated. 
finally theyre able to knock bb down and hes out and theyre both tired and worn but they DID IT and the one piece is luffys and theyre facing each other grinning ear to ear and zoros saying “you ready, king of the pirates?” and luffy laughs and goes “not just yet zoro, i still gotta-“ and then theres a spear piercing right through his chest. and in the next moment its gone. 
theres a gaping hole through his captain and theres blood, theres so much blood and luffy’s still smiling like he hasnt realized it yet, like it hasnt even registered. zoros ears are ringing and he doesnt know what to make of whats hes seeing because its just not real, it CANT be. 
he looks over luffy’s shoulder and blackbeard is on the ground with his hand outstretched , black energy coiling back into his form and he’s laughing and laughing with bloodstained teeth. hes fucking laughing. one moment zoro is still standing parallel to luffy and the next hes in front of blackbeard and the mans head is rolling through the dirt and gravel, wado dripping crimson, a terrible gap toothed grin still stretching the man’s cheeks. 
zoro is breathing heavy, hes trembling and hes almost mesmerized by the blood pooling around a lacerated neck— then he’s remembering luffy and turning around and calling his name and he can see right through him theres a HOLE right through him and he chokes and stumbles and rushes to his side right as luffy starts to crumple to the floor . catches him and lowers him gently and doesnt know what to say. 
hes still shaking but cant move his mouth and everything is muffled, the sounds from the battle outside are distant and they dont matter but what does he do. what does he do. 
he snaps out of it when luffy gently calls his name. a strong “zoro,” like hes not fazed at all. like there isnt blood soaking into zoros clothes. 
his brain kickstarts and he’s speaking. saying things like “youre ok you’ll be ok” and “choppers right outside i’ll just call him and he’ll fix you right up” and “you always bounce back, right captain?” and hes thinking “dont die please dont fucking die. not now, not when we’re this close please dont fucking die” and hes silently praying to all the gods he doesnt believe in but luffy calls his name again and his mouth clicks shut. luffys saying it’ll be fine, that he had fun. that hes proud to have made it this far with all of them. and those sound a lot like parting words so zoro’s shaking his head no but luffy is still smiling. hes saying that hes glad he had zoro, that he made him happy. hes saying to tell everyone he’s glad they met, that hes glad they all had each other, that he knows theyll be just fine . 
zoro wants to say that luffy should tell that to them himself, when hes wrapped up and recovering and alive but his mouth is glued shut again and he feels that interrupting luffy now would be cursing him to death, like his words are the only thing keeping him tethered here, he just needs to get him to keep talking to stay awake. 
he tries to smile but it comes out ugly and wrong and he feels his lip wobble so he drops it. he settles on rubbing his thumb on luffys shoulder. something to keep him here. 
so he rubs and luffy talks little things until he cant anymore. until his eyes grow dull and his skin loses its warmth and still zoro rubs and he rubs.
thats how law finds them. zoro hunched over a body that should never be as still as it is. and its really no surprise hes there, hes been gunning for the one piece since the time he could captain a ship (or a submarine) but it all feels so wrong. 
zoro either doesnt notice him or doesnt care, but either way the man doesnt acknowledge law until he’s right behind him. its not like law can say anything to announce himself either, not after seeing the state of the body that zoros currently holding. the body that used to be luffy’s. hes still processing it all when the other man(the one whos alive) finally speaks. 
zoro asks if hes got a devil fruit. less of a question and more of a statement, but he should know anyway since theyve spent considerable time together and hes literally seen him use it. law cant unstick his jaw so he hums in affirmation. “and you can switch stuffs’ places?” another hum. “what about time.” 
that makes law pause. “what?” his voice comes out stronger than he feels. 
“what about time? can you switch things in time?” by this point law has awakened his devil fruit or some shit dont sweat the logistics but hes never tried anything of that sort so he kind of stumbles “im not- maybe? ive never attempted-“ zoro interrupts “send me back” 
“what?” 
“send me back so i can fix this. you can do that, right.” it clicks. law would pity zoro if he didnt know any better, instead he just feels mounting despair and resignation. 
he may not be crew, but he knew luffy too, he was allied with the man for fucks sake, and this just feels- wrong. he sighs, a tired, heavy thing. 
“what about your crew?” its useless. zoros as stubborn as his captain, with arguably a handful more screws loose. “it wont matter. they’ll never know because i’ll make sure this doesnt happen.” he still hasnt turned around. law doesnt know what expression hes making and hes sure he never wants to find out. 
hes ready to deny it, cut his losses and head for the one piece himself (hes not heartless, but if he stands here any longer and has to look at. well. he think he might never be able to move again) but then he really thinks about it. could he? would it even be possible? surely this isnt the way things were supposed to go, surely this isnt right. luffys never been one who was supposed to die just like that, like this, law knows that much. he thinks hes going to regret this, but he counts it as one last thank you for everything luffy did for him. 
youre gonna owe me big time strawhat-ya. if i even remember this, that is. 
he puffs a breath “i can try. i cant- promise anything but. i think we both know this,” he makes a vague, weak gesture, “isnt right.” 
zoro doesnt say anything, law didnt expect him to. he just bows his head slightly and law takes that as the acknowledgment it is. 
he brings his hand up, “dont do anything stupid, zoro-ya. or, at least, make it stupid enough to bring him back.” 
he positions his fingers in way so familiar, but the weight of it now is nearly unbearable.
room.
shambles
zoro’s world shatters, differently than before, and then theres nothing.
he wakes up in bed, bleary eyed and a pounding headache assaulting his senses. his alarm clock is going off which only adds to the drumbeat against his eyes. he grumbles and whacks around aimlessly to shut it off. the silence lasts a moment before his eyes fly open and he jolts up, sheets pooling around his waist. luffy. where was he? where was zoro? did the crew find him and take him back to the ship? did law fail? but this didnt look like chopper’s office.
he looks around to find hes in a room hes never seen before in his life, yet he instinctively knows is his. it all feels so wrong, like he doesnt belong in his own skin. he scratches lightly at his arm. he needs to go to work. 
work?
what the fuck is happening. 
its like his mind is at war with itself, one truth trying to dominate over the other. he trained at sensei’s dojo. he aged out of foster care. he was a swordsman, he was the first mate of the strawhat pirates. he didnt go to college, hes working construction. he made a promise, and kuina died. kuina…died. huh. his captain, his luffy, someone he knew so intimately and who knew him in turn. hes never met someone with that name his entire life. he needs to go to work, he needs to find his crew. 
he doesn’t understand what the fuck is happening. 
without his permission his legs stand him right up and he moves confusedly, surely, to the bathroom he didnt know he had. his reflection stares back at him in the mirror and its him, of course it is, he doesnt know why he expected someone else, but hes also…different. he has both function of his eyes, first of all. a scar in the same place as before but its light and healed over and doesnt seem to have blinded him like it once did. his hair is green, sure, but black roots peek out from underneath the familiar shade. hes grown stubble, he should shave. he needs to go to work. 
hes so confused, but his body moves like its been doing this its whole life. as far as zoro knows, it has. 
he continues getting ready, mind still at odds, and makes himself a cup of coffee (in his own kitchen. his own kitchen? the state of it leaves less to be desired. sanji would surely skin him alive) before tucking into his shoes, grabbing his wallet and keys and heading out the door. he seems to live in a single room apartment, and a crummy one at that. his legs move him faster, he has to go to work, he cant be late again (again?).
his car is parked outside the building, he has no fucking clue what it is but he unlocks it all the same and settles in. he feels like he shouldnt be operating this sort of machinery. franky would know better than him how it must work. he starts it up and backs out. trusting his gut to get him where he needs to be. he should be more concerned, he should be frantic and inconsolable, his captain was dead in his arms and now hes? what? going to lay some bricks or some shit? but he finds that part of him dulled in favor of following whatever mundanity this body is pushing him towards. 
uumm whatever whatever he arrives at work eventually i dont know how construction jobs work are there offices or something. idc thats not the point. johnny and yosaku are there and zoro is surprised to see them since, as far as he knows, the last time they were with each other was at arlong park which was years ago for him. but the two greet him like this is a daily occurence, like theyve been working together for years. and zoro thinks, knows, they must have. but this is good, this is great fucking news actually because until now theres been no confirmation if zoro was here alone (wherever “here” is) but now his proof is right in front of him because if johnny and yosaku are here, and they exist the same as from before, then that must mean everyone else is here too right? he clings onto this hope with both hands trembling. 
nami, usopp, the cook and chopper and robin and franky, brook, jinbe and fuck. fuck, luffy. theyve got to be here somewhere, zoro just has to find them. hes not sure if they remember things like he does but hes got to try because they are his as much as he has always been theirs and they should all exist together as it has always been. 
so then yeah he finishes his shift because its what hes ‘supposed’ to do but he doesnt go home. he drives around aimlessly before pulling into a random lot and pulling out his phone (theres no snail attached to it. weird.) he doesnt even know where to begin. hes not usually the one coming up with plans, he just goes where theres blood need to be shed. but no one seems to be in any danger here except for maybe himself, and its not like he has his swords anyway- shit. fuck did he still have wado? he must have right? he knows there was a kuina that existed here too, he knows because he remembers. and she, well she wasnt around anymore so he must have wado. he must. with shaking fingers he pushes that aside for now, though barely. he needs to find luffy, but he wouldnt even know where to start. luffy could probably find the rest of their crew by simply wandering around and happening upon them, thats how he did it before. but zoro has no idea where he’d be, he doesnt even know where he is. nami or robin would be a good bet to at least form a plan, but he wouldnt know how to find them either. 
is there even a coco village here? would robin still be part of baroque works? he needs someone who has a defined location that he could google or something (what the hell is google?). usopp would be at syrup village right? shit. is there even a drum island? these are all too broad, he needs something specific. specific…..a place with an identifiable name, somewhere smaller that would be easier to stake out…
a lightbulb goes off. 
fucking shit he thinks. of course. of fucking course it would come down to the cook. 
he types in “baratie” to his maps and a location pops up, just 27 minutes from where he is now. he hasnt eaten yet either, so he figures thats killing two birds with one stone. he taps the address, backs out of the lot and drives. 
(if it takes him nearly an hour to get there thats nobodys business but his own)
he pulls up to the building about a quarter after 7. it seems packed enough already, but if memory serves him right then that was just par for the course for baratie. he parks, gets out and locks his car, then shoves his hands in his pocket and resigns himself to another oncoming migraine hes sure to get upon interacting with the man hes certain is waiting somewhere inside. 
the tables are full, the host tells him, he slips a 20 from his wallet and suddenly (of course) theyre more than willing to serve him. 
he gets settled in a far and somewhat isolated booth and a waiter comes up to him, but he cuts the man off as hes introducing himself and says “you got a blonde working here? stupid ass side part with a weird eyebrow? goes by sanji” the waiter looks shocked and put off by his rudeness but quickly collects himself and says “we might. depends on whos asking” zoro snorts “just tell him hes got someone who wants to talk to him,” he cringes at this next part, tries to smile but knows it comes off as a sneer. hes not sure if he still has conquerors haki wherever he happens to be now, but he tries to channel that energy the same way he would if he were in battle and says “tell him im a fan.” the waiters eyes widen, in fear or surprise zoros not sure (most likely a mix of both) before he nods and scurries across the floor, weaving in between patrons and coworkers alike until he disappears behind the double doors to the kitchen. 
zoro sits with his arms crossed and skims through the menu out of boredom and impatience. its a couple minutes before he sees a familiar head of blonde hair emerge from across the way. a smile climbs onto his face despite himself. sure, the guy annoyed him to hell and back and their…friendship (if you could really call it that) was a tumultuous one, but it was good to see someone familiar nonetheless. he schools his expression before the blonde can spot him. a few moments pass before hes standing right in front of zoro, his stupid suit primped and pressed as always, and a cautious look on his face. 
“you asked for me?” his tone is the one he only reserves for men who he deems not worth his time. zoro grits his teeth but says “yeah, theres something ive gotta discuss with you.” 
hes never been one for tact, forever blunt unlike his swords. 
sanji quirks a brow “i dont plan on talking about anything with anyone unless theyre a paying customer” zoro feels his eyebrow twitch but grabs his menu nonetheless and points to a random item without looking “i’ll have this then, and whatever booze you got.” sanji leans in to see what hes pointing to before his one visible eye widens and a grin slowly overtakes his previously unaffected face. 
he speaks condescendingly. “wonderful choice sir, coming right up.” before zoro can get another word in he grabs the menu out of his hand, spins on his heel, and marches back to the kitchen. 
zoro clenches his fists and does his best not to grind his teeth into a fine dust. no matter where they are or what displacement in time the fucking curly brow never fails to be absolutely insufferable. at least this way though, zoro knows its him for real. 
its another 20 minutes before the shit cook reemerges from the back with a platter and a mug in his hand. he steps up to zoros table and places the plate and cup down in front of him with a smug look. zoro has no idea what the fuck hes looking at on his plate. he doesnt have time to question it before sanji plops down in the booth seat across from him, disregarding all previous faux-professionale and asking “so what do you want” zoro tears his eyes away from his plate and looks into sanji’s, trying to convey as much emotion, as much urgency as he possibly can. 
“luffy needs us. and we have to find him” whatever the cook was expecting him to say, it definitely wasnt that. the other man regards him more warily now, looking him up and down with a tense frown before replying “i dont know what the hell youre talking about. and i dont appreciate being mocked or having my time wasted” he goes to stand up but zoro grabs his wrist, yanking him back down unceremoniously. 
he blinks before rounding back on zoro, flaring his nostrils in a way zoro knows means hes about to get himself in deep shit “oi, what the fuck do you think youre-“ he doesnt let him finish “im not mocking you. this isnt some stupid prank or whatever youre thinking. and despite how much i would enjoy punching your teeth in right now im not looking for a fight either.” 
the cook still looks affronted but seems to actually be listening. zoro continues “look, i dont know what the fuck is going on. i was at laughtale with you and the others, with luffy, and then i woke up and now im here and i dont know how but this is all wrong. its all wrong but i need to find luffy and fuck, i cant do it alone. i need your help to find him. find everyone.” the blondes eye is wide, but he blinks and its gone. he looks more tired than zoro has ever seen him 
“im not paid enough for this shit. i dont know why i even-“ he looks like hes getting ready to leave again but zoro is desperate at this point so he blurts out whatever he thinks will convince the other man hes not bullshitting.
“we met you here, at the baratie. me and nami and usopp and luffy. luffy busted through one of your walls so your old man punished him by making him wash dishes. i dont, i dont know what luffy said to you, or how he convinced you to join us, but he changed your life like he did mine. we sailed together, and we had each others backs no matter how much we got on each others nerves. you were our cook. i was our swordsman. luffy was our captain and youd do anything to help him, i know you would, same as me. youre a pervert and an asshole and a damn annoyance, but youre strong. i could still kick your ass though” if the cook’s eyebrow could go any higher hes sure itd be clear off his forehead by now. 
“and you- your dream. you wanted to find the all blue.” he stalls there, engine sputtering. zoro doesnt know what else to say, so he snaps his mouth shut. 
the blonde is still gaping at him like a fish, but he mouths the phrase “all blue” like hes been searching for it his whole life, like he always knew but just never had the words. 
he blinks. 
then he blinks again, rapidly. there are tears pooling in his eyes. his mouth flaps for a moment before he seems to finally be able to push out words. 
“you- zoro?” he sounds small. he sounds hopeful. zoro grins. 
“yeah, yeah its me.” sanji stares at him a moment, then looks around, as if hes seeing everything with clear eyes for the very first time. zoro figures he might as well be. 
“holy shit. holy shit.” 
zoro laughs, a rough thing. theres a ball in his throat that he cant seem to dislodge. “nice to have you back, curly brow” sanji’s gaze snaps back to him before he scowls and tries wiping away the tears that are now streaking down his cheeks. its useless though, it seems they cant stop. zoro laughs again at the sorry state of the asshole in front of him, this time more full and genuine. he feels so relieved he doesnt know what to do with himself. 
“yeah yeah, whatever dick head.” sanji grumbles. zoro quiets down, glances away, lets him have his moment. “fuck, mosshead, im still on the clock and you unload all this on me? how the hell am i supposed to finish the rest of my shift?” his words are sharp but he doesnt sound angry at all. in fact, when zoro turns back to look, hes smiling. 
“you remember now though, dont you?” he has to be sure. 
“what does it look like, dumbass? think im tearin’ up cuz of pollen or some shit?” the cook rolls his eye. theyre both silent for a moment, trapped in their own heads, before he speaks up again. “so, what now?” zoro doesnt even have to think before he answers “we find everyone else, obviously.” “well no shit, but how?” zoro glances to the side. “i was hoping youd figure that out” sanji stares before bursting out laughing. zoro scowls and hunches into his shoulders. 
“of course!” sanji cackles “of course your dumbass wouldnt know what to do! you probably just typed in the most recognizable place you could remember and hoped one of us would be there!” zoro doesn’t answer, because yes thats what he fucking did, but it worked didnt it? he doesnt see whats so funny. 
“fuck you.” 
he wants nothing more than to bash that smarmy mouth in, but the familiar egging settles something in his soul. sanji gasps a few breaths before calming down, now wiping tears from his eyes for a completely different reason. 
“alright alright, well lets figure this out then, yeah? we figure out how we got here then we can figure out how to get back right? simple enough” 
zoro nods, “law was-“ he stops. remembers dull eyes and clammy skin and wrong wrong wrong. he shakes his head, “no, no we cant” sanji looks at him confused. 
“we cant go back,” zoro presses, “not until i fix things. i promised i would” the other man seems to pick up on his panic and his mood dampens, becomes more serious. “promised what?” 
zoros never been one to sugarcoat, but now he wishes he could find a way to soften the blow hes about to deal. he inhales, pushes the breath out. says, “luffy died, sanji.” the fact the hes actually using the other mans name seems to fly right over his head in favor of the first part. “what?” zoro huffs, is he really gonna make him say it again? “luffy di-“ sanji interrupts, angry now, fists clenched and whitened from the pressure “i heard what you said. but what do you mean.” 
he doesnt want to have to tell sanji what happened, doesnt want to talk about it at all, wants to slice it up into small enough pieces that it very well may have never existed.
he told law the others wouldn't have to know, that he would make sure of it, but he's realizing now just how unrealistic that is. as much faith as zoro places in his own abilities, he's aware he's only one man.
and, he figures, if there's anyone i can trust enough to share a burden heavy as this with, might as well be the one who's strength i'd count on just as much as my own.
sanji cant help if he doesnt know what went down once they got separated at laughtale, so zoro sets his shoulders, clenches his fists, prepares himself like hes riding into a battle he knows he has no chance of winning—hes the first mate for fucks sake—and resigns himself to filling the other man in on every horrible detail
by the end, the cook looks much the same as zoro feels, pale-faced and shaky. he runs a trembling hand through his hair and clenches his eye shut. “fuck mosshead, thats…” he doesnt bother finishing, and zoro stays silent—already knowing just how much of a shitty situation it is that theyve found themselves in.
(btw the reason sanji was so smug about what zoro randomly chose on the menu is bc its one of their most expensive dishes. even upon regaining his memories he still makes zoro pay it cuz hes an asshole like that. business is business 😁)
uuummm i dont feel like detailing the rest basically my idea is that they work together to try and track down all the members as well as law, since hes also a part of this. i dont know how or when or in what order but i do know finding luffy would come last. so yes its zolu but for a majority of it more in spirit than anything. maybe i can throw in some luffy pov of him living with ace and sabo . he knows something is off but cant place his finger on what. he knows something is missing but hes got his brothers with him so what else could he possibly need? etc etc. you get the idea
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