#your own identity and very being

[misspickman]

very compelled by elsters gender both in a transmasc and transfem way bc well elster transmasc lesbian? beautiful wonderful 10/10. she is a robot whose body was made to fit the standards of what people consider a woman to look like, as is the case with most other replikas, so once she starts being treated more like a person of her own instead of just a worker robot, its fun to think of her chafing against it. on the other hand theres elster who was made to look like a woman/her neural pattern is copied from a woman, but is still treated like an object thats only there to do the job. shes referred to by others as 'it' in a dehumanizing way altho not purposely degrading bc they dont consider her a person enough to see this as cruel to her in any way. and slowly she ends up regaining her personhood and a concept of gender that feels right, as much as it can, considering the circumstances

#its complicated right. bc i dont think replikas would consider this much but also idk they are conditioned not to #elster being with ariane who disobeys the rules of what youre Not supposed to do with an elster replika clearly ends with her regaining mor #of a personal identity and willingness to like. make her own choices that arent orders #dont tell me about how this game is not about gender i know. its impossible for me to see a robot character and Not think about gender #especially in this case where theyre so clearly gendered #but still they are almost exclusively referred to as units and replikas and model names #i think falke is the one who actually gets she pronouns in reports? and most of it is by adler who is also a replika #anyway i think its very fun how all these robots are so clearly gendered but also not at the same time #which to me makes the concept of elster choosing to think of herself as a woman also very trans #she is made to look like one she is not meant to Be one #and its hard to say she would think of this bc we rarely get elster think of herself at all #theres two instances i can think of where she refers to herself #txt #signalis #yes u can use it pronouns in a normal not derogatory way but u know thats what was intended in the game

[gremlin-pattie]

having transfem mutuals is not only recommend but necessary

#there are a lot of transmasc people on here #and i love you transmasc mutuals mwah #but i think it’s important to get the perspective of trans people of different identities/backgrounds #we all have a lot in common but there are also unique experiences you might not consider on your own #and in my experience they tend to be very nice and fun people #and ofc there’s more than transmasc and transfem #you can be either or neither or both and still be trans #i’m being kind of general here for the sake of brevity #anyway #love you transfems #transgender #trans #transmasc #transfem #nonbinary #lgbtq+ #queer

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

the inherent fourth wall breaking of found footage stories not in the sense that the characters are leaving the fiction or able to look outside of it, but in the other direction that the audience becomes part of the fiction

#thinking of doug eiffel logs that we listen to that have the in-universe purpose to keep the main antagonist updated on their situation #thinking about characters in the bright sessions finding out and being upset about their sessions being recorded #the very recordings that are our only way in to the story #thinking of the hard-to-pin-down-at-first identity and purpose of the microphone in ars paradoxica #so omnipresent that you might not even register it as found footage at first #only to find out way way later on the whole town is bugged #(i think that was the reason? been a while) #thinking about the camera in carmilla that sometimes seems to have a will of its own and just Turns On when theres smth interesting happeni #the nature of being a character means you Are Being Watched #you only exist to be watched and when you are being watched #but sometimes #you can reach out and touch not the watcher per se but the medium #and you can look back #you can take control #you can unbug the house #turn off the camera #use it against the watcher #who is fucking up your life #because often that is what theyre doing #the in-universe watcher #it's almost impossible not to feel implicated as an audience member #and you are being cut off too #from the story #when the character fights against the watching of the antagonsit #when the character deceives the antagonist #you are also being deceived #like what they say abt hera when pryce is on board like. shes compromised. assume everything hera knows pryce knows. so you cant tell her #anyway

[gloriousmonsters]

Mememememe I want to see

please enjoy a selection from you're on a path in the desert, chapter 2: 'The Ancient', brought about by wondering what ganondorf's motivation is and being honest and brash enough he kind of likes you and is like 'sorry, kid' while murdering you to attempt a breakout in the first chapter. narrated by Zelda, starring Link and Ganondorf.

--------

You're on a path in the desert. Or... it's more of a beach, isn't it? You can hear the sea. Small crabs scuttle and hide among rocks smoothed by eons of lapping waves; the pristine sands glitter, here and there, with old coins and jewels set in tarnished metal. Pirate treasures, as if a ship was wrecked here long ago. A lonely blue sky arches high above, unmarred by a single cloud. A path of scattered white rocks, like sun-bleached bones, lead toward the edge of the water. At the end of this path, a man with evil eyes is imprisoned. A king. You, hero, must slay him; or it will be the end of the world.

Voice of the Curious: He didn't seem that bad!

- Yeah, he wasn't as bad as she hyped him up to be.

- Bad? He was very bad! I'm completely on board with the 'slaying' thing now.

- Hang on, how are we here? Didn't we die?

> I see what you mean, but he did very much kill us. That was a thing that happened.

Voice of the Curious: I guess, but he was so... sad. He just wanted to escape. He seemed like he'd been there for a really long time.

> He did.

Excuse me, who's this? And what are you saying about dying? Please don't tell me—

Voice of the Curious : We died and we came back to life!

- More or less.

- I died and it was terrifying and now I'm me and also this other part of me and they're both me and I don't know how that works or what's going on and I'm going to start crying probably

> This isn't the first time we've been here. Your 'man with the evil eyes' was the one that killed me, not the other way around.

He's not mine, and... It wouldn't be the same, the other way around. You need to slay him, not kill him.

- I get it. I'm a human, and he's a monster.

> Semantics.

Very important ones. Listen to me, hero. I hoped that this wouldn't happen, and I didn't want to scare you with the possibility. But please believe me—we're walking a fine line, now. All is not lost, but every failure widens his chance at escape.

Voice of the Curious: Really?

I do not like how you said that. This... voice, whatever it is, it seems very young. Don't let naivety influence you, hero. One failure means he's already found a chink in your armor—it is even more imperative you keep your guard up. Whatever he said, whatever he did, put it out of your mind. Focus on this. He is evil, and he will destroy everything if he escapes. You are the hero, the only one with the power to stop him. I—everything depends on you.

Voice of the Curious : That's a lot of pressure...

- I love pressure.

- I hate pressure.

 > Are you really sure I can do this?

Yes. You’re the only one that can. 

Voice of the Curious: Wow, she sounds... so serious. I don't know if I trust her, but I think she likes you.

Ha. That's... You matter a great deal to me. By definition, of course. You’re the hero, you matter to everyone. But we don't have time to sit here and talk about our feelings, whatever they might be. Your quest is the same, hero. It's time to go forward.

> (proceed to the prison)

N: At the edge of the water, the path of rocks continue—for a little while. Soon they're fewer and farther between, and in their place are footholds of debris, half-rotted hulls of wood, old chests rammed up on some invisible sandbank below the water. There have been many wrecks here, and as you pick your way forward, you see the largest of them up ahead. Splintered and broken, its massive hull impaled on the tall and jagged rocks that rise from the hidden seabed, like towers of some sunken castle. The rest of it is remarkably intact, but it looks ancient. Weathered, by years that have sapped color from cloth and wood and leached memory from material. Every detail blurred. The figurehead is faceless, nearly formless, like the... like the image of a loved one long forgotten.

> Are you all right?

Your path ends—or rather, takes a new form—at the side of the wreck. An old rope ladder leads up the barnacle-encrusted side. The old wood creaks as you ascend, but even that sound is... muted. This ship isn't just wrecked, it's becalmed. The muting of that sound makes you acutely aware of the absence of others. No birds cry in the sky; no fish splash in the water. The land behind you is already lost in a hazy fog. This is a lonely place.

Voice of the Curious: She's making it sound so depressing. It's sad, but it's also sort of cool, right? It's like an old pirate ship! It doesn't feel like a prison, it feels like... like a hideout!

Please be quiet. It's a prison. It might look... odd, but it's a prison.

Voice of the Curious : Do you think there's treasure?

...No.

Voice of the Curious: ...You want there to be treasure too, right?

I'm not interested. We have a very important job to do. To your left, across the weathered deck, a door leads to the fo'c'sle. It's not locked, but it's encrusted with barnacles, warped in its frame. Beside it, a sword is embedded in the wall, as if left there after a battle long ago. It gleams with its own light—

Voice of the Curious: It's not glowing, though. It's just a sword.

It's not—but... Ah. Yes. Well, it doesn't need to glow, does it? It's the hero's sword. It's made to kill evildoers and monsters. It's meant for your hand, and your hand alone. Take up the sword, hero. You'll need it if you want to save us all.

- But it's not glowing. Didn't you say it was important it glowed?

- What if I don't want to save everyone?

> take up the sword

- don't take up the sword

Sword in hand, you force open the door, rusted hinges screeching as you shove your whole body's weight against it. Before you is a sheer drop, lightless, only the first few feet visible in the foggy sunlight that filters past your shoulders. A rope ladder hangs over the ledge at your feet, vanishing into shadow. The air is musty, damp, and smells of moldering spice and rotting silk, wood permeated with gunsmoke and worried by the icy teeth of the ocean over the course of centuries. If this is the prison the king's been confined in, killing him will be a mercy.

His voice echoes up from the darkness, tired but commanding.

The King: I knew you'd return. Come here, boy. Let us speak face to face.

Voice of the Curious: He remembers us! And he sounds... older. I mean, he was already older than us. But he sounds much older now. 

Of course he's old, he's been in prison for a long time. Don't dwell on it or wonder about it, the more time and thought you give him the more dangerous he is. Just get down there and accomplish your quest.

> proceed down the 'stairs'

After what feels like half an hour of nerve-wracking descent, feeling for foot and hand-holds in the darkness, light begins to bloom below you. When you come to the bottom, a few minutes later, you find yourself facing another door—this one richly carved wood, remarkably well-preserved considering the state of the ship. It's hard to make out much in the light filtering through the cracks around it, but you can see intricate, geometric patterns, and the snarling face of a boarlike beast carved huge in the very center.

Voice of the Curious: What—

You waste no time fooling around and asking questions, and open the door. Striding within, you find yourself confronted with a surprisingly lavish room, dimly lit by old oil-lamps. Rich rugs cover the floor; a huge bed stands in the back of the room, partly hidden by curtains, and a huge desk carved with intricate details dominates another side of the room. Tapestries, paintings and maps nearly cover the walls, save for a section that seems dedicated to a number of weapons—at a glance you see twin swords and a trident. Everything feels a little... oversized, as if you're a child venturing into the room of an adult. When you look closer, you can see signs of wear and age—cracking paint, books with pages puffed by soaking and drying out, scratches in the fine wood and dust on the tapestries—but the overall effect is still opulent, overwhelming. This feels right for a prison meant to confine a king; it would be suitable for an emperor, confined to his office by the new regime, allowed to keep a pretense of dignity.

But across the room from you, there's a strangely bare section of the wall, interrupted by only two things: A porthole filled more by spiderwebbing cracks than glass, showing only blank darkness, and the King, who stands tall and studies you thoughtfully with pale gold eyes.

The King: You approach me, yet again, with your blade in hand. Interesting.

He's a big man, broad and heavy, a physique that might impress as brutish or sedentary if not for the way he holds himself. Straight-backed, imperious, with a hint of a fighter's grace in the way his stance shifts as his eyes track the step you take forward. There's no gray in his hair, or deep wrinkles on his face, but something about him gives an impression of great age and greater weariness. His face is craggy, but his eyes are delicately lined with black; he wears a topaz on his brow, and fine robes that inspire ideas of entrenched and confident authority. As he seems to reach an internal resolution in his appraisal of you, his teeth bare in what is hard to determine as a mocking smile or a grimace of pain.

The King: I suppose that if you try to kill me this time, it will only be fair. But I'd rather we talk.

Voice of the Curious: Ooh, talk! Yes! I want to know what's going on! Just, um, maybe we should stay at a distance.

Remember what you're here for. Don't listen to him, or him. Please, hero. Kill him now.

- slay the king

- kill him?

- You killed me last time, I'd like an apology before we do anything else.

> All right. Let's talk.

#ganondorf #loz link #loz zelda #slay the princess #as in an au in the style of #wind waker #(essentially i mean obv this is the Wind Waker chapter and VoC is wind waker link tho i might tweak him) #and yes my idea is that the 2nd chapter ganondorfs are mainly based off his different game portrayals #(although i figure just 'ganon'/beast form at the very least might be a chapter 3) #i have so many vague ideas tho... like i'm debating whether i'd want to have a Damsel-esque based off the idea of 'nice' ganondorf #where he's totally defanged and like a happy jock #or lean into the dehumanization element of TotK as being equivalent to the Damsel.. sort of combining it and a more negative take #on the Adversary - not a cardboard cutout LI but a cardboard cutout villain #pretty and threatening with 0 cohesion or depth below the surface #probably netted by wholeheartedly believing Zelda's narration and leaning into your own 'hero' identity in your first encounter #...maybe if you make a bid for compassion/depth even in the face of that you get TP ganondorf? #the mocking warlord who's surrounded by hints of deeper history and context? #ok i'll stop now. #it's an old song and we're gonna sing it again #vic talks #LoZ

[astro-b-o-y-d]

Nobody tell this website that egg jokes aren't annoying because the concept of someone potentially being a trans woman instead of a feminine man is somehow bad (it's not in the slightest and if that does turn out to be the case, said woman should be treated with nothing but respect in terms of her gender identity). They're annoying because you do not know that person and misgendering anyone is rude and even if you're right, that's not anyone's business but theirs and you're still misgendering them now.

#Hayley Speaks #I don't even know or care about that one streamer and I couldn't care less about what he identifies as #Because it's no one's business but his #But I have my personal beef with people who are THIS mad about people not liking egg jokes #Because it's like...I think what it boils down to is that you don't know that person #You do not know what they might identify as in the future #It is literally NO ONE'S business but theirs #And even if you're right; it's not cool to push your own personal labels onto them if they are NOT there yet #By making jokes about what they MIGHT identify as down the road; you are literally putting them into a box they are not in #No matter where the journey of gender identity might go for them; that's not okay at all #IDK I feel like if I saw someone trying to egg a real woman with short hair and a butch style as transmasc I'd also be really uncomfortable #(I say real bc like...there's a difference between egging real people and fictional characters) #(REALIZING VERY QUICK after typing my tags that I should specify that; egging fictional characters is totally different and I support it~!) #You don't know her #And even if that IS the case for her later on; what business is it of ours? #I don't get the anger outside of people just being mad that people don't like them misgendering someone #Yes I can understand hoping that someone you might look up to might fall into the same gender identity as you #But that's still a human person #IDK this Finnster shit is annoying to see from all sides #Literally who cares?? Let him be whoever he wants and stop being weird about it.

[amatres]

playing an elven circle mage in origins is such an experience, they are the only one without any deep route connection with others outside the circle. no one will recognize them outside other circle mages. there's even an option to choose that they don't remember where they're from like wtf.

what would that even do to a person, to feel like they don't have anywhere to belong outside of the institution that tries to convince them that simply being born as they were is a crime that must be paid by being locked away their whole life, surrounded by people trained to kill them if they ever got too upset.

and the people they can find community in are mostly all human, including those who remember life outside the circle carrying the prejudice that comes from that. the templars and the unspoken aspect that elven mages who run away from the circle don't get to be brought back alive they are just killed because why would they trust an elf of all people to not delve into blood magic and talking to demons as soon as they are out of the sight of templars. the mages who speak of the injustice of their situation more than likely being human because the humans get to live long enough to speak out about it, humans who often times only see the suffering of mages at best, and at worst vocally dismiss the plight of elves and how that intersects for elven mages and-

#dragon age origins #dragon age #surana #to my followers i am sorry for my dragon age spiral this happens every once and a while #this is also why i headcanon my own surana as not knowing her actual name #and surana was just something one of friends named her after something from a book #the circle took everything she could be from her including her own identity outside of it bc i ❤ tragedy #but also this is likely the story for many mages in the circle #think about the circle mages you get as companions. wynne was named after the place they found her #anders whole thing being he refused to tell them his real name and so they just called him 'the ander' and it got shortened to anders #i am very normal about circle mages i dont know why youre asking

[fortes-fortuna-iogurtum]

idk man but it seems that when you start becoming aware of your own IssuesTM you also begin getting a little uncomfortable with how many of those same IssuesTM are present in popular interpretations of fan-favorite fictional characters

#to be clear: I'm not bashing people processing their issues through fandom. I get that. have done that. #it may not be the most ideal way to process things but it is A Way and sometimes it may be all you have for a while #the thing that's worrying me a bit is how much of it isn't a path towards restoration. it's just... there. #like it's an integral part of who the characters are now and everyone feels that it's Very Important that they are That Way #and there's little to no hope of it ever getting better bc this is The Character now #idk maybe I'm just reading my own yearning for hope and restoration and redemption into my experience with fandom lol :') #but. maybe a little bit of the issue is the way that we present issues as Static. and we can't allow them to ever be fixed #bc that would take away an aspect of 'identity' if we did #your brokenness is not your identity. it may be part of your story. but it is not /you/. #this is what I'm trying to force myself to believe lately (and yes it is directly descended from my faith. I must believe in redemption #and restoration. because otherwise there is no hope. and I cannot live without hope. no one can.) #gurt says stuff #fandom #**if people start being weird on this post I will delete it and block them this is a fair warning**

[lildoodlenoodle]

You know I do mind my business when it comes to the majority of forms of queer discourse FOR A VARIETY OF REASONS, but mostly because it is always So Dumb. Never has any nuance, never helps anyone, makes the lives better of absolutely zero people, and can actually have negative effects on the internal queer community as well as the external view of it. ‘Infighting is at best redundant, at worst harmful’ type of thing.

But every now and then a little something something will get me. Which is usually the absolute pride that someone has in being a bigot or an exclusionist, while also being apart of the queer community. Almost always going hand in hand with the blatant distrust of people in your own community to be genuine and know how they themselves identify. The almost competition to not seem like ‘one of those gays’ that fall outside of what is considered a societally acceptable way to be queer, as well as what that person specifically considers to be an acceptable way to be queer according to their own personal understanding of gender and sexuality.

The pungent audacity just turns on such a primal level of disgust and vitriol in me that throws all my anger management practice out the window.

You’re boring and unoriginal by contributing in the exact same stifling of queer voices and identity that cishet people have been doing for hundreds of years and calling it a hot take with pride.

#anyways it’s fine #rant post #i just 😭😭😭😭 #and it is usually 1. online and/or 2. from a young or newly out queer person #and I understand why those misconceptions happen at that stage in a lot of peoples identity discovery journey #and it is not in anyway the individuals fault #it’s largely having no real education or resources and being forced to use the internet for an incredibly complex and nuanced topic #and people want to understand new things. it’s easy to put things in boxes and simplify them! we’ve all been there! #but at the expense of steam rolling other peoples’ identities in your own community 😬 #where my true anger comes from is the arrogance and inability to learn and grow or be understanding to people who aren’t you #it’s just frustrating and upsetting to me on a very deep level #and to be even more specific -> #everytime I see that stupid ‘smth I’m not afraid to admit as a lesbian’ TikTok meme I know I’m about to see some of the most vile takes eve #vent post #queer discourse

[rogersstevie]

one thing about me is even if i hated the book i just read i will still be defending the main character while all the goodreads reviewers go on about how whiny and selfish she is

#hi do you not understand she was 18 and did not get to figure out her own identity before becoming the wife of a grown man #do you not understand how postpartum works lol like she did a bad thing leaving the kid for a few months #but like. definitely worse things a struggling mother can do! #like she was doing all that with zero support because neither of them were connected to their parents at that point #and she didn't get to make any friends because as soon as she came into this city she got pulled into his life #and he's certainly not helping because he's always working and he thinks she has it so easy being with a baby all day #even though he absolutely DOES see how impossible it is to calm the kid and YET #and even when she leaves and he has to do shit himself and sees firsthand he still doesn't acknowledge it much #anyway that was a dumb book but it's like i always go looking to reviews for validation on not liking it and i see that shit #and i'm just like no no she was not the issue #it's literally like.........so many books i read where a woman is Going Through It #and is somehow expected to just be graceful and perfect all the time both within the book and by readers??? like what are y'all on #being rightfully unhappy about your situation does not make you whiny even when you're in the wrong sometimes you need to complain! damn! #and also she rarely did complain that's why she had to just leave because if she had said anything to her husband #about her struggles he would have dismissed her and told her to wait it out #god. i think it was very weird that i didn't see mention of the age difference in other reviews #literally. just graduated high school. he is 28. i'm just.

[notedchampagne]

no i get why ppl were pissed about the fanon davekat content before because when i look at sakuatsu and seriei content now im shocked at literally the exact same dynamics repurposed for characters with different personalities.

i do get that people have a taste for certain tropes and dynamics but there is a difference between headcanons and interpretations that influence a certain perception of a character due to personal tastes and like, reducing complex and meaningful characters down to their most consumable archetypes to mass produce another artwork of twinks kissing

#overly obnoxious flirt whos secretly a disaster + tall and gruff looking partner whos secretly a softie #the flirt often has trauma that is either exaggerated or romanticised. the gruff guy is either inexperienced or a sex god #etc etc you know the drill #and i could make a venn diagram of the three ships i mentioned but they are in NO WAY that similar #seeing skts posts that are literally just hornier tskym #and its very prominent now in recent hs fandom. i think younger teens have been getting into fandom recently #the way you can see dynamics and hcs that are nearly identical to stuff ive seen circa 2016 #im not necessarily criticising it. okay maybe a little #ill let ppl do whatever this post is for ME but its genuinely eye opening to look back #on things that youve done with your own two hands and looking at other people and being like #wow! damn! i was not immune to the entry level appeal of these bitches holding hands when theyre presented with the Specific dynamic- #-im looking for! and then upon consuming the media youre already looking at it from a biased and subjective perspective #chat

[lesamis]

If a face, as Johann Gottfried Herder says, is nothing more than a Spiegelkammer of the spirit, then we should be a little frightened of Keats's variety of expressions. [...] Keats is unable to contemplate himself. His gift is not knowing how to reconcile himself. The identity of a person who is in the room with him presses in and cancels his own out in a flash. When Keats speaks, he's not sure he's the one talking.

"John Keats", in These Possible Lives, Fleur Jaeggy

#happy two-hundred-and-second anniversary of keats's death all #the past couple years have rightfully dragged the term empathy through the dirt but i do sometimes wonder about this passage #''the identity of every one in the room begins so to press upon me that I am in a very little time annihilated'' #and about how much of how incredibly loved keats was by his friends and equally how angry he was #might have been at the crux of this thing. the giving others so much room that you lose substance of your own #which makes you a kind and loving friend and a brilliant poet but also makes you hard to know #and not being known by those who love you the most. that way lies despair #and bitterness too #anyway when i was digging out my copy of these possible lives an old boarding pass from december 2018 fell out #london southend to cologne bonn. i was 23 and going home for christmas and insanely joyful all the time. christ #keats

[flippedorbit]

do you want me to fucking go off on you? do you truly fucking want that mother?

#“oh you and your sister never listen to me and blah blah blah” we fucking do (or at the very least i do) #“you guys never help out” does me doing the litter and taking out the trash and on occasion hand washing the dishes mean #fucking nothing to you? does me sweeping the floor every once in a while because you chose to keep us in an area that is ALL SAND/DIRT ROAD #for whatever stupid ass reason also meaningless? does me doing my damn best to help out mean fucking nothing? #do you want me to kill my self. do you want to lose your eldest child to something YOU could have fucking prevented all because you can’t #stop being a bitch to him all the time? do you really fucking want that mom? because at this rate i am once again on the road to fucking #attempting it. i’m so god damn sick of how you treat me. the only time i can do anything i want is at night. i stay up super late playing #games with my friends because its the only time in the day when you aren’t bitching and whining for me to do something you don’t want to do #for the past several days i’ve been up until five in the damn morning just to do something that makes me happy. #you misgender me. you deadname me. you refuse to accept any aspect of my identity. you don’t treat me like a god damn person. #i have so many different ways i can consider attempting if i truly wanted to. the only thing keeping me alive is my friends. because they a #least show that they fucking care and actively want to do things with me. like group drawing or playing video games. #YOU on the other hand; mother; yell and get mad at me over the stupidest shit and never fucking apologize. #i cannot recall a singular time you’ve apologized for being a complete bitch to me over something so fucking unimportant. #and yet i’m expected to be completely fucking fine and happy all because you provide me with the bare fucking minimum. #”i clothe and feed and provide a place for you to live” THAT IS THE BARE FUCKING MINIMUM. sure you could argue over the fact i’m 18 and #should be out working somewhere. but you give me so few opportunities for going places and even considering getting a job or finally gettin #my driver’s license. plus i would rather fucking die than work any food service or customer service job. because i’d be going somewhere #where i’d mostly get talked down to or yelled and then come home and have the same shit done after working for hours and getting minimal #pay. i’d rather work on my own fucking terms with commissions than go into any job where i have to interact with others in public for any #reason. where i’d be treated just the same as at home. like someone who isn’t a person and doesn’t deserve anyone to be nice to them. #i constantly so desperately wish that maybe one day soon i’d find someone to be with romantically and that i could maybe live with them and #get out of this hell hole that i’m supposed to call home. to go somewhere and have my efforts appreciated. to go somewhere where i’d #actually fucking be loved. i shouldn’t have to wish so god damn hard for a better life all because my mother can’t fucking treat me like a #person with hopes and dreams and thoughts and feelings. #i’m ending this rant here before i get too angry and upset. see you all in maybe an hour. #suicide mention #ask to tag

[leatherbookmark]

ootd features the words "black dress" in its lyrics and people are like oh! this is a reference to another group's song, "black dress"!

i'm unwell.

#shrimp thoughts #also 'you people just Don't Understand' part 2: apparently there will be Part Two. just like with gee idle's allergy and queen/card #which. lol. apparently 'when allergy came out people were shocked because the it was basically 'if you're ugly tough shit just get a #surgery' but once queen/card came out everything was clear!' and like. how was it clear. what was clear. #one song is 'boo hoo i'm so ugly i hate looking at myself in the mirror and no one likes me i should get plastic surgery' #and the other is like 'ya hoo i'm so hot and sexy i'm like these two western celebrities!!!! i'm so cool i'm twerking on the runway' #kp/op kinda sucks balls in that it's like.... musical equivalent of tjlc crossed with marvel. it's basic ass pop made to sell except with a #faux deep garnish. and sometimes the garnish stands on its own! like if you take guerrilla it's clear that there's actually no deeper or #more detailed philosophy behind it. it's not really n.o where the 'rebellion' was actually supposed to be against something concrete #it's like. we want to feel! we don't want... not to feel! but the sound and visuals are strong enough that you don't mind it #like fuck yeah the lads are staging a revolution now! and now they're outlaws in a western! sort of! and now it's alice in wonderland! #but v often the companies actively make use of the fact that kp/op stans will obsessively look for Depth and Serious Themes in their #cultural reset slaying sotys. a girl looks at a butterfly? oh the song is about having an identity crisis like in that one poem about a guy #dreaming about being a butterfly. it's actually very deep and you can see it was all planned because there was a little butterfly icon #above the tracklist. and the fans get so attached to their headcanons theories and interpretations that they don't stop for a second #to check if there was anything in the 'text' in the first place #remember that one magritte post? this is also how kp/op stans interpret things. she wears a blue dress here and blue is the color of summer #and summer is when you have holidays and don't have to go to school! so by this blue dress she's trying to say that you should love #yourself and strive to be the best version of yourself by embracing your hobbies and extracurricular interests. this is so genius 😭

[wikagirl]

every time when I make an oc the character is some weird little mix between traits that I see in my friendgroup. For example a lot of my ocs are adhders and and some form of queer because that's how my friendgroup is.

I have this one friend that is a walking talking manifestation of everything that people who insist that there are only two genders HATE so every time I take a piece of them and toss it into the oc-making-blender I basicly sit here going.

#they actually have xxy chromosomes #its more common than you'd think actually #around 1-2 out of 1000 people that are “supposed” to have xy chromosomes have it but only like 25% get it actually diagnosed #putting the supposed in “-” bc it makes it sound like there is something very wrong with my friend #even tho its really just nature doing its silly little thing #and there is a suspicion that people with the condition have a higher chance of being autistic and/or have adhd apparently? not sure tho #also yes I have their consent to talk about this bc they think its cool too #they talk about it a lot themselves actually bc they work with kids that had to be removed from their home for their own safety #as a way to go “hey we're both weirdos so you're not alone and you are valid in your identity” #a lot of the kids are queer and rejected by their parents #we actually have like monitored living complexes for teens and young adults that don't want to be put in foster care #but idk how those work really bc I'm lucky enough to have parents who do not give a shit #also angelo if you by some miracle end up seeing this: ily and you still owe me 5 bucks for that döner kebab at gamescom <3 #start reading tags you silly little goober that's where people hide the good stuff