#you'd know those evil levels are really high

[citizensun]

Queerness and the House of Usher (spoilers!)

See I just added these Thoughts to the tags in @quecksilvereyes 's post but now I have Feelings too

TFotHoU (or HoU, as I will refer to it here), as expected from a Mike Flannagan show, has a bunch of Queer Rep™ to talk about. HoU is, also, about remarkably evil people - amoral capitalists who'll step over anyone if it means they'll get something from it. And look! Some of them are queer! Kinky too!

That's bad queer representation... right?

The show isn't that clear when stablishing sexualities, but we see that at least three of the Usher kids - Napoleon, Camille and Victorine - have same sex SOs/assistants with curious job descriptions. Prospero's taste for orgies probably implies queerness too, but honestly I don't remember if he gets it going with any guys in the story. I honestly have no idea about Tamerlane's voyerism thingie and Frederick is the only one with a "traditional family" going on.

Unrelated, but: Leo is definitely cheating on his bf Julius. Completely dismissing about his worries for him too. And for his cat. That's objectively evil, clearly. Vic literally killed her fiancée Alessandra, though she didn't stuff her under the floorboard, which is an L when compared to Poe's original. Cam doesn't believe in true love. Perry blackmailed his sister in law. Mean. He's also got a surprisingly high kill count for the family's disappointment, but since unlike Roderick he only killed rich people, we stan. I don't belong in Kinky spaces so I haven't got a big take on Tammie, only that - well, she's completely dismissing of her husband and sees him as a prop, just like the sex worker she hires.

Huh.

See, the nature of a story called "the fall of X family" is that X family is going to be the main character. The title kinda implies that they're falling for a reason, ergo, they're despicable fucking people. And they're queer! They're very queer. Many flavors of gay. They're the main characters, and they're monsters, and they're gay.

No, that's not bad rep.

Queerness as a movement, a community and a theory is very focused on scaping a cisheteronormative society's binaries (ie man/woman, husband/wife, public/private) and creating living conditions to those who fall outside of these categories - mlms and wlws, the trans, the nbs, the aros and aces... we are all queer, strange and estranged from this weird and limited worldview. And so we create a community for ourselves. It's very focused on care and anti-stablishment. Since a cisheteronormative society tends to be very white, rich and western, it's also focuses on anti-racism, anti-capitalism, anti-imperialism. Y'all know that, this is Tumblr and we love leftist Discourse.

I also know many, many gay people irl who are not like that at all. Libertarians, anarcho-capitalists, terfs, completely apolitical people and the like. Sexuality at it's core is personal, not political, so there are gay people out there who are perfectly comfortable with their sexuality on an individual level but do not see the point of getting involved in the broader context. They're queer, but are they...?

Well—

Not to mention there's lots of asshole gays out there! Don't you have a shitty ex? Have you never been almost run over by a drunken butch who blew cigar smoke into your face? I have! Life experiences are just like that. Maybe you should touch more grass. You'll probably find a lucky gift from your neighbour's dog, who is an astrology-obsessed bisexual and also really hot but stopped making out with you at a party once she found out you're a pisces (the neighbour, not the dog).

(Granted, none of this is as bad as implanting an experimental heart contraption into the fiancée you just killed because she dared to have ethical principles and then being so consumed with grief you stab yourself in front you'd your dad but you know how it goes. We're not the 1%.)

My point is, queer people are people. We are complex. We fuck up, and sometimes there's still times to fix things and sometimes... there isn't. We're consumed by jealousy and regret and sometimes we're so locked into our own head we stop believing the rest of the world is real too. Just like any other people, because unfortunately, queerness isn't a sign of morality.

And even if queerness does mean community, kindness and acceptance, tell me... Where the hell would the Usher kids get those from? The people around them are not really peers – they're ass-istants, blowjob-giving apartments, orgy mates, heart surgery providers, hired fitness moneybags, perfect housewives. Even if the partners are all shown to care for the Ushers, there's still a distance, a power gap, that makes the relationships fundamentally wrong.

And the partners? Arguably they're the good queer rep in the show, but look – even when Julius and Alessandra are shown to be good people (or at least people with an ethical boundary), they're not the good gays, they're simply the good SO's to a family of psychos. Exactly like Bill and Morrie, who afawk are straight people.

Which leads us to HoU's parameter of morality - Auguste Dupin. He refuses to drink the Amontillado, symbol of all the Usher opulence over the years. He got screwed over by the Usher twins and by the Raven herself, but he refused to cave in (except for the informant part, admittedly). He's not a good gay guy; he is gay and he is a good man.

The fundamental difference between our show's main tragic yaoi couple isn't that Auggie is a happily out gay man (and therefore is good) while Roderick is a sad divorced hetero (and therefore is bad). Auggie is the richer man because he is a good man; he has a spouse and children and grandchildren he loves with all his heart. He has a family and a community and he has found a sort of happiness no money can buy. Roderick owns the world – but what does he really have? What do his children even have? How could they ever build communities for themselves if they were never in one? Their father made them compete for his love. He never nurtured their bonds, he just showered them with money and excess until it was too much for them to handle. Juno herself pointed out - they were never a family. The House of Usher was only that. A house. It is empty and soulless.

What is queerness without a community? How could the people who represent the relentless corporate normativity and cutthroat capitalism ever be good queer rep? How can they even be queer?

Hear me out: on the most individual, simple level, being queer is still about not fitting in. These kids are bastards. They are are PoC and women in a predominantly male and white dominated space. They're on top of the world, but they're still outsiders to their own House. How could they not be queer?

And yes, I know this discussion takes a different turn when it comes to representation in media, but it's not like Flannagan fell into a Hays Code-era flamboyant villain trope. Queerness is just there. Just like Victorine and August are both black people in (arguably) the opposite ends of the morality spectrum, there are queer characters of many kinds here. The story just happens to be about the fucked up ones.

HoU is a poignant critique of capitalism and a surprisingly funny adaptation of Poe. We'll judge it by that. It happens to be queer – more things should be.

#the fall of the house of usher #TFotHoU #victorine lafoucarde #camille l'espanaye #napoleon usher #prospero usher #tamerlane usher #roderick usher #queer theory #queerness #lgbtqia #edgar allan poe #mike Flannagan #sun o' mine

[voidsentprinces]

Shadowbringers took Emet-Selch from ARR Lahabrea levels of mustache twirling, Saturday Morning Cartoon villain. All monologue and evil laughter while his evil boobs malevolently boobed down the Post-Stormblood's darker breast boobily and changed him into an actual character. And the first Ascian who actually spent time with us in a more meaningful way. Flipping them from one note, evil that must be defeated. To one we came to understand and a group that connected to our character's literal past reincarnation that we do not recall.

Additionally, atmospherically, Shadowbringers brought us to Post-Apocalypse that wasn't 28 Days Later, Mad Max or Rapture-esque. While pulling from all those series. Its a world 100 years after the Apocalypse was averted but still causes the world to live in its shadow.

This expansion seems to be the beloved darling of the community. Even topping Heavensward in most regards. But, also, personally, I feel like Shadowbringers is only good Shadowbringers for the last three levels of it. And rest is just so much set dressing and putting together the A-Team. For lack of a better comparison, 70 - 79 is our Avengers Infinity War. We get the band back together, fight off the big bad and actually almost win. But then we lose and we lose HARD and we spend a handful of quests somewhat wandering aimlessly until we resolve to go after the one who took victory away from us. That lead up, to me, is alright but the story didn't really HIT, outside of my long winded story analysis reasons, until we reach Amaurot.

Even its Post-Patches seemed to struggle to figure out what to do. Having Elidibus bounce hither and thither without the Scions really trying to stop him because, "We don't know what he is up to." which was counterproductively frustrating to me. You are literally not stopping and banishing the villain so the plot can happen. Alisaie literally kept tabs on the Warriors of Darkness because we were focusing on dealing with Nidhogg. Why the hell couldn't they have kept tracked and harassed Elidibus at least? But no, the sky starts to shower stars and then it is go time. And while To the Edge and the Seat of Sacrifice are awesome. My suspense of disbelief that our Scions would just shrug and only off screen keep tags on lesser Ascians and then just be like, "I dunno fellas, this here Elidibus is tricky." strikes me as dense. Like, this is denser than a dead star. They let things happen for the sake of it happening.

Bottomline, there is some wiggle room here. Shadowbringers may be the community's darling. But I wonder if, its just because we remember the super highs of Amaurot to Seat of Sacrifice. And kind of brush things like; the Ran'jit fights, the Supernatural problem of Lucifer's Cousin's Roommate being the big bad in Lunar Primals, Thancred's treatment of Ryne and Speedrunning him some redemption in the Amh Araeng second half.

I'm rambling now, as a whole. Did you enjoy Shadowbringers? If not why? Vote your answer and leave your opinion in the tags if you'd like.

Note: I am aware that the Post-Patch production was stunted by the COVID Pandemic. Still, I'd like your opinion about anything you felt lacking. Even with that dead whale hanging over the entire thing.

[empressofmankind]

Things I enjoyed about writing my Crocodile/female!OC smut, in no particular order:

If you had to imagine the walking, talking embodiment of all Buggy's insecurities (imo), I feel like you'd get Sir Crocodile, and that's pretty much how I went into writing him. I set out to absolutely maximize Buggy's: "Oh no, her ex is (insert self-deprecating qualifier) than me". You know, tall(er), confident, masculine, accomplished, infamous, intimidating, actually scary, redundantly rich, pretty conventionally attractive and the scar just adds to the sex appeal. He has a voice like that, and no doubt a way with women? He's even near perfected his control over his devil fruit powers! Absolutely aces the whole Bounty Hunting business thing. Rolls in and out the Grand Line like it's his backyard. He's even better at being Disney-levels of evil! Complete with a better villain laugh. How dare. How dare he absolutely nail most of everything Bugs covets? Poor Buggy. The fact that his girlfriend is technically still married to the jackass is just an extra kick in the gut while he's down, tbh. Basically, if Bugs were a piniata, this is currently my stick of choice to go at him with. I just keep finding new aspects for Bugs to be insecure about and it doesn't matter how often Shivs tells him not to worry about it.

As you know, I wrote the whole thing first in three sits, ignoring most of the limb logistics. And then I went in and revoked hand privileges. That sucked? But it was also kind of fun to then try and either make it work with one hand and/or integrate his hook. Some of the instances actually got far better with it: neck pulling, ahoy! is a big one, hitching up clothing for a close second, but also being casually threatening for no apparent reason (and then for a really apparent reason, omg). Croc seems to lean towards preferring to use his hand, and sometimes he misses having two of them for this and I tried to show that. I mean, I get it - hands have tactile sensation. Plus, we wouldn't want to kill her. Not at this point in the timeline.

God tier banter, if I may say so myself. I specifically enjoy writing (sexual) banter, but I feel like I've outdone myself here. Their beats are also pretty even-handed and so well attuned to eachother, like this isn't their first verbal rodeo, this is the end stage mega evolution of years of practise.

The way Shivs walked into her ex's office with the intention of manipulating him with sex, but did so while explicitly and recognisably wearing her current boyfriend's clothes. Balls of steel, this girl. But, she knew who she was confronting. If he turned out at all amenable to her scheme, he'd want her out of these rags stat. And that was five free steps in the direction she was meaning to go. In addition, I am a firm believer of him being a high-key closeted bisexual and we all know what they say when boys excessively pick on you. All it takes is squinting just right and imagining her with a different hair colour, and that just made me chortle. I am probably the whole target audience for this, but yolo.

The way his pet name use corresponds to his emotional headspace, apparently. I wasn't doing this intentionally, but I noticed during editing. He says 'doll' a lot (a grand total of 14 times, jfc), uses it the way guys tend to use 'babe'. I felt doll suited him, perhaps because I strongly associate it with Noir films, older Bond & Mafia movies, and crime bosses in general. Showing my age there, maybe. Then he also uses 'sweetheart' quite a few times (9 iirc), and I am pretty sure he does so in an endearing manner. Lowering those emotional walls a teeny tiny bit as fondness seeps through. And then, like, once or twice, he uses 'honey'. And, again, I feel like he uses it in an older manner, the way stereotypically a husband fondly refers to his wife. It feels intimate. Like he briefly forgets all of this is dust? I think about that a lot.

Did you notice how she doesn't use any terms of endearment? I did wonder if she had any, but I felt like she wouldn't use them. Not at this point. Not any more. She loves Bugs. She did slip up once though, did you notice? She is the queen of mildly awkward nicknames.

It may not seem so at first pass, and it's certainly not super obvious, but it seems to me like he's trying pretty hard to put Shivs' relationship goals bar somewhere on the roof. He wants nothing and no one to be able to even remotely compare to him, especially not the clown. So he throws everything at this that he can? Which, arguably, is mostly material because that's in his nature and fundamentally how he interacts with and relates to the world and people around him. But you saw how fast he was to gtfo that couch the minute she alluded to any part of this being cheap (Mediocre? Sub-standard? Blasé?). Does he genuinely not want to cheapen the whole thing? Or can he just not stand the idea of her thinking this whole thing is cheap? Or both? I suppose these aren't mutually exclusive.

I like that she can make him laugh, and vice versa. They've got really solid chemistry, dammit.

Two people that just really enjoy smoking. Like, they are Smokers with a capital S. That's a whole relationship dynamic unto itself. I am really pleased with how I managed to actively integrate it into their shenanigans. It was a lot of fun and something unique to them.

The way he just repeatedly fails at trying to engage her in a little girl dynamic. Was that a thing in the past? They had (and have) a fairly notable age difference (7-8 years, give or take). And he takes it so well when she just, doesn't play along or only does so for like five entire seconds, or blatantly wields it against him. Poor guy. Just spank her already, I know you want to.

The way Shivs goes from being mildly nervous and quite determined to: 'Oh fuck, I'd forgotten how good this actually used to be'. Like, been there, done that, didn't end well. But man, it's a mood.

Press F in the chat for the fact that she only had one orgasm in this whole thing, and it barely took the edge off. Jerk knew what he was doing. It's a power play, of course.

Sneaking in background information and then doing absolutely nothing with it. Like the comment he makes regarding both their facial scars. But also every time either of them alludes to their past relationship but doesn't actually tell us anything.

Mihawk is a wine aunt. Even Crocodile seems to think so. I am sorry, I don't make the rules.

The part where he just happens to have things on hand that she either likes (i.e. that specific brand of cigarillo's his company makes) or that fit her way too precisely (i.e. that outrageously swaggy negligee). This dude is not OK. My man, if you still know your ex' dress sizes this well after several years, you need to do some introspection. And maybe see a therapist.

The infamous fancy panties were originally a gift from him, and she evidently kept them these past years? I am not sure what makes me frown deeper: the fact that she still has them, or the fact that he immediately recognised them. I don't think she was necessarily wearing them on purpose? She does really like them and wears them often. RIP those undies. I think she's way more upset about losing them than she lets on. I wonder if she'll accept new one(s)? I suspect she may, something about gift horses. Maybe he figures? Maybe that's the point. A renewal of something. A visual reminder of the casual control he can exert over her when he wants to. It may seem insignificant (she will definitely not overthink it), but underwear is very private and intimate. He's staking a claim even without particularly saying so. But I am sure every other man in the room will figure that one out. (Counting on Mihawk to say it out loud in that bored drawl of his. The Bisexuals Straights Are At It Again.) Doubly so if they're particularly prone to feeling insecure. Poor Bugs. Just take this one lying down, you silly clown. She wants them because she thinks you'll like them and she knows neither of you can gdamn afford anything remotely like it.

Did you notice she isn't truly naked at any point? Partially undressed, yes. A little exposed, also. But not naked. Meanwhile, he's stomping around in his bare ass half the fic. I like how he gave her something nice to wear and then didn't take it off.

At this point, I feel like he gets pants problems the minute she calls him 'sir', no matter the context. Some things just get sexy tainted forever, and there's no going back, lmao.

The unnecessarily expensive details. I had so much fun with those? The layout and details of his office and bedroom, for one. Both their smokes are implied to be well out of Shivs paygrade. Any brands come to mind? Or take the wine, for example. Can you guess which one I am referencing? And the lace - I am from a traditional lace-making area. Handmade lace was and is hella expensive. Don't even start about lace featuring custom tailored designs. There was absolutely no need to throw this much Beli at the nearest wall. But he did it anyway, because he does it all the time.

The way he keeps verbally reminding her of how different things used to be. For the better, in his opinion, of course. Like, are we casually trading favours here, or are you trying something?

On that count, did you notice how often Shivs is actually thinking about Buggy in this? At no point is he far from her thoughts, it seems.

I didn't set out with this mindset, but based on how the whole thing came out - I think Crocodile might miss her (or the idea of her) ? At any rate, I don't think he's OK. You stupid dick. You self-marooned on this island of misery and now it's too late. No changies, no takebacksies.

I came up with the title post-fact. Maybe it's his thoughts, not hers?

#sir crocodile #crocodile one piece #one piece crocodile #crocodile x oc #crocodile x reader #one piece headcanon #crocodile headcanons #one piece fanfiction #have some headcanon #buggy thoughts #one piece

[chronotsr]

Pre-G1 Modules, part 2 - Palace of the Vampire Queen and DK1-3

Asterisk 1: The first standalone module, Palace of the Vampire Queen

(Another proud DND tradition, evil woman with her tits hanging out, representing here. This adventure is by Pete & Judy Kerestan, the operators of Wee Warriors.)

I'm trying really hard to not get TOO bogged down in exterior details to the adventures themselves, but a small preamble about Wee Warriors. Wee Warriors was a little company that was born to publish DND supplements. They were one of many, there were many zines and magazines and fan supplements going around, for example Judge's Guild forms at roughly the same time. They worked with TSR after a while to publish these things, so they were unofficial-but-official in a weird way. Early DND culture functions less like a business and more like a hobby community. Most of the early DND people knew each other in some capacity, it's only when DND got really far away from Lake Geneva that distinct cultures started forming island effect-style.

Good enough, let's keep going.

Our preamble gives us the basic of the adventure, dwarf island harangued by vampire queen, the undead keep abducting people to eat their blood. Conspicuously absent is any kind of information about a suggested level or party size.

It's cute, right? The styling is so welcome and loving in a way that TSR products will not have for a long, long time.

It's very rote, lots of very basic traps and stocked rooms. Not much to see he--

T-telepathic kittens that improve your morale? This is one of those moments where you just instantly know. The hobby isn't as different as you might thing. This is the exact sort of adorable shit you'd see on one of those big streamer shows. We all love our cats. They are our strength.

There genuinely isn't much to say about the rest of the module, other than that there is a shocking amount of child murder. There is an evil castle with a vampiress in it and you gotta go whack people til you can claim the reward money. About the most interesting twist you'll find in here is that there's a fakeout queen, and that the genuine queen will immediately take the (unnamed) dwarf princess hostage to secure her escape. I do appreciate that, if you're going to make every room just be a combat encounter with loot in it, the decision to make the key a table with room/creatures/max damage/description is sound. I'm kind of surprised this table-style key never caught on, given the 'doom monster closets' design that typifies a lot of early DND.

I wish that there was a great revelation waiting here for you, that the first non-TSR adventure was a forgotten classic? But it's really not. It's some monster-stocked rooms with the rare trap, and a vague preamble. Temple of the Frog showed a lot more creativity. I am kind of strangely fond of these lovingly inked maps though, it makes me long for hand-inked maps again. The Dungeon Master's Kit product line continues for two more entries (The Dwarven Glory and The Misty Isles) to form a soft trilogy.

Bonus Round: Skimming the rest of the Wee Warriors Dungeon Master's Kits

So the thing about the DK product line is that it's not very interesting. But since I had to get a copy, I'm making it your problem by talking about them more.

Everything about this room fascinates me. There is so much going on here that isn't explained. And then you keep going to room F7:

Again, nothing is fucking explained. The monsters are in conflict because why not? There's actually a great idea in here, (although again, why is child murder so prevalent?)

There are wisps of interesting narrative here, but all that's actually presented is like…the end-state? "Evil high priest who is abusing a tragedy to push his agenda" is a solid plot point. The idea that returning the treasure can cause conflict is great. But also, holy shit 500k gp diamond. That's enough exp to max your character in one fell swoop???

Moving onto Misty Isles, this is more of a…. setting than a module per-se. There's some implied plots I suppose. Here's some of the weirdest things:

The leader of the dwarves on one island is implied to be gay, which is a strange decision given how we don't have any other practical information about him, and has melted all his gold into one pile

A profit-prophet who gives oracles for bribes

Many, many dwarf seems to have access to actual modern day machine guns?

A band of monks are looking for a girl stolen by zombies. Why….did they steal her? Why is there hope of rescuing her? They're zombies, they're going to eat her!

I cannot do this justice myself:

That's….that's a lot. You want to randomly roll for nearly 600 magical objects? Sometimes designers Simply Say Words. The "My PC is the most bestest guy ever and could never be defeated" stories you hear people whinging about take a very different context when you realize there's just, GMs running around handing people literally 600 random magical items. Eventually you're going to roll and get the best items in the game. Note also, literally zero way of detecting any of the traps.

This random paragraph implies the existence of gamemaster-less play, a thing I guess could hypothetically exist with the degree of randomization, but. What?

Absolute queen shit. You go succubus lady! And the fairytale logic is cute cus, if the party got mad when they found out about this, they could always give her weight from some magic bullshit, like turning her into lead. Oops!

And it just goes on and on. There's a Cthulhu reference, there's a party of fighters who casually want to rape women (why were 70s gamers like this), the obligatory slavery character, et c. It's not the first setting released for DND, there are multiple people in front of this, I believe Empire of the Petal Throne won overall [fuck MAR Barker, nazi scum], and City State of the Invincible Overlord certainly predates it by a year. In 2024, it's a pretty tedious read. It reads like a list of ideas, because it is. There's some maps, but the maps are very sparse.

#ttrpg #tsr #dnd #dungeons and dragons #0e #chronotsr

[k-dokja]

Could you do 💚 and 💗 for Yoojin, Goo, Gun, and James?

EMOJI MEME | 💚 What’s their type?

Eugene Yoo — I got asked this four times so this will be the last time I answer this : D

Emotional intelligence but not emotional manipulation. He is cynical by nature and any attempt to control him would get noticed immediately. Whether he told you that or not is another matter entirely. Maybe he’d continue your act to amuse him.

Genuinely, he wants someone on the softer, sweeter side of the spectrum. A nurturing personality would be nice, someone empathetic and obedient. 

You should be able to understand his line of work without interfering with what he’s doing. It’d be nice if you’re mature enough to understand that he wants you to stay away from all of this for your own good. 

Park Jonggun — This one isn’t easy to narrow down and I struggle with typing him often. He wants someone with enough independence to function without him much of the time. Ambition is a must, wouldn’t make sense with his character otherwise.

A shrewd and calculating personality is great but you must also at least have some levels of integrity. 

You need to have a high level of pride, but not to the point where you are blind to any flaws you possessed. In fact, it’s more attractive if you are aware of them and work to amend them. Knowing the holes in your plans is a great attribution to anyone with a grand design after all.

And, yes, the will and the ruthlessness to accomplish what you set out to do.

Kim Joongoo — A fellow nerd. He likes that you can understand the references he made, and even if you don’t, you’re receptive to learning. Having the patience for his fun and giggles is a must, otherwise, there’s no point.

A high level of energy would be nice, but it is not a necessity. However, you should match his level of spontaneity, or else it’d get tiring really fast for you. 

Joongoo is very fast-paced and he slows down for almost nobody. Taking him seriously all the time is the sure-fire way to make things boring. Just enjoy life, don’t think too hard about it unless you’re talking about profit.

Oh, yep, yep, someone morally shrewd and conniving will be great but has to be one who’s on his side. He likes having someone who can scheme and be evil with him.

James Lee — Someone who counterbalances him nicely in terms of personality and ability. It’d be nice if you’re fun to tease but it isn’t a requirement.

He likes that he can have you give it to him straight without messing around, but not too serious to the point where you can’t make a few wisecracks every now and then. He likes a sense of humour that’s like fine wine, you’re meant to savour it not chugging it down like an energy drink.

You’re probably on the quieter side, but not to the point where you can’t hold a conversation with him. Some confidence is a must, he wouldn’t be attracted otherwise.

Intelligence is also very, very appealing in his eyes. Seeing you show your smarts just makes him want to undress on the spot. 

💗 How do they show affection

Eugene Yoo — He doesn't have a lot of free time, which makes whichever time he has for you infinitely more precious. Often, he tries to make those occasions special, either a fancy dinner, a night out, or a weekend trip to somewhere relaxing.

During these times, he actually likes listening to you talk about your day and whatever going on with your life. You'll find that he avoids talking about his work, but he listens attentively to whatever troubling you and offers a helping hand if you needed.

You can see his affection in the fact he actually listens to you and keeps notes of what you like and dislike. Whatever going on with your life, even if he has a packed schedule of his own, he does keep track of it. Every now and then, he brings up something you once mentioned to him that is relevant to the moment.

You'd be surprised by how thoughtful he can be because this also means he memories your preferences pretty well. This often manifests in the gifts he sent you. Not often enough to make it annoying, but always outstanding enough to make it memorable.

Park Jonggun — One would think how much he splurged on you is his way of showing affection. Quite wrong. There’s little love in how he spends money, whether it’s on you or on him.

In fact, materialism for him feels extremely clinical, like how one does surgery to change an “imperfection” on their body. It only adds to improving his appearance and status. If there’s anything which expresses his affection, it’d be how he does the small things for you.

He has a way of making you feel doted on. Even if you didn’t ask him, a lot of things he does for you happen so smoothly you didn’t even get the chance to register that it was… surprisingly chivalrous of him.

He always angles the umbrella over to your side more, trades shoes willingly when your heels hurt and hold your bag and jacket without reservation.

If you can count on him doing the gentleman thing for you, then he indeed cares about you. The treatment of a Queen for a Queen. 

Kim Joongoo — Incessantly pestering you about anything and everything because whenever he learns something new, he immediately thinks of you. He's very self-absorbed so the fact he thinks about you alone is pretty outstanding on its own.

He also spends a lot of time around you, making the two of you almost an inseparable couple. If he's not around Jonggun doing something sketchy, he's likely with you doing something sketchy. Or, you know, watching anime, reading manga, spending time together.

Outside of that, he really likes to drag you out with him and go on adventures! Whether it's to play sports or video games together, or going shopping and attending events, it doesn't matter!

Long as the two of you are having fun together, he's content. Seeing how happy you are with him is definitely a bonus point.

James Lee — Once upon a time, he teases you to show affection. Nowadays, however, he does the same but with a little bit more maturity to it. He normally keeps quiet about everything, but when it comes to you, he can’t help but get a bit smug and sardonic.

You make it too easy, sometimes. Even if you don’t retort back, your reaction is always amusing even in the way you deadpan at him. He thinks it’s really cute.

Outside of that… it’s the time you spent together. You’ll see he has a very packed schedule and often doesn’t get to stay home. Even when he does, there’s always something to do that prevents him from relaxing. Whatever spare time he has outside of that, it’s all yours.

You might not get to do a lot of romantic things together, but long as he’s around you, his stress level drops by half. How much he seeks you out portrays the depth of his affection for you.

#eugene yoo #eugene yoo x reader #park jonggun #park jonggun x reader #kim joongoo #kim joongoo x reader #james lee #james lee x reader #lookism x reader #lookism #headcanons #emoji meme

[avidrawsthings]

Cursed Snyde (Post-Soft Reboot)

When I gave a soft reboot to my au, one of the many details that were changed included the curses inflicted on Merula for the actions she took in Year 5. Pre-reboot, it was only one. This time it's two. Everything's been divided into sections in case there are parts you'd rather skip. For those already familiar with the backstory, feel free to skip to Section II: The Curses

I. Context

This is a Merula that actually faced consequences for the stuff she did to MC from day one. As Reina's relation to Ricardo (Jacob of this setting) wasn't publicly known, she avoided the same scrutiny the MC faced, so the ire of students fell on Merula for her own behavior. She refused to learn anything from it and her dislike of Reina turned into full-blown hatred, and by Year 5 she was practically a villain.

She reached her breaking point after Reina tried to warn her about Rakepick, as the former correctly sensed the woman had malicious intentions. Merula took it as Reina trying to rob her of the little happiness she had, and from there opted to make her life a living hell. Her goal at first was to drive Reina into leaving Hogwarts for good. Wanting to do as much emotional damage as possible, she:

Took advantage of Penny's vulnerability after what happened to her sister Beatrice, and manipulated her into turning against Reina and the rest of their friends. Her bragging about it drove Barnaby and Ismelda to cut ties with her.

Worked with Emily Tyler to spread some nasty rumors that nearly ruined Reina's reputation for a good while.

Knowing Reina had a potentially lethal allergy to poultry, Merula tried tampering with her food to leave her hospitalized.

Vandalized many of her personal belongings.

Caused Reina's stress levels to get so high that it led to chunks of her hair falling out, prompting her to cut it short.

Despite being confronted and receiving a well-deserved beatdown, Merula wanted Reina gone, even if it meant her death, self-inflicted or not.

She had Reina's Crystal Wand stolen and succeeded in breaking it. Those wands are made from a fraction of the user's Soul. Breaking it would cause them to fall into a coma for several weeks until said wand would finish repairing itself. Crystal wands are far more durable than traditional wooden ones, but Merula was determined.

The only reason she didn't resort to the Killing Curse was because the risk of getting caught was far too high. Not knowing the wand break only led to a coma, Merula thought she succeeded and felt nothing but pure joy. She really wanted Reina to die, after all.

Surely Rakepick would be impressed with everything Merula had done to earn her approval, right? Reina had to pay for all her lies and false accusations. Madam Rakepick would understand.

II. The Curses

It's because of these malicious intentions and desires that Merula was Cursed. Not by anyone in particular, however. This was different. As the products of Vytarian Magic, these Curses were triggered all on their own, punishments born from the actions she willingly chose to take. Curses that no mortal was capable of casting no matter how hard they tried. These Curses are known as Retaliation and Seal of the Condemned.

They're irreversible as they trigger when the person has reached the point of no return. They're rightfully feared and shunned in Vytarian communities, and they're arrested on sight. Those Curses need to be earned, after all. The thing about such Curses is that it's exceedingly rare for minors to be struck with it. Vytarian Mages have a strong belief that children shouldn't be condemned for things they can outgrow and learn from with proper guidance. For a child to be struck is nothing short of a tragedy, as their fates have been eternally sealed.

Their Souls have been forfeited to the Demons. As the representing Denizens of Death, Destruction, and Darkness, the Demons are also tasked with delivering eternal punishment to all of the evil Souls that are sent to their domain known as the Nightmarescape, depicted as Hell in some religions. While by no means evil themselves, Vytarian Demons are still incredibly sadistic and waste no time in subjecting their targets to torment the moment they're Cursed. When the target's Soul gets consumed at the end of their mortal life, it's only then that their true eternal punishment begins.

At the time her own fate was sealed, Merula was just a few weeks shy of turning 16. Both Curses struck her shortly after she broke Reina's wand.

"It appeared as though she may have been in denial at first after these Curses took hold. Turns out she just wasn't taking them seriously. She was too busy taking delight in believing she successfully killed my daughter. That's all that mattered to her in that moment. She said so right to my face after I asked her why she did what she did. The grim reality will set in for her sooner or later. Reina will recover in time, so I won't be pressing any charges. Not that it'd do Ms. Snyde much good, anyway. Azkaban is nothing compared to what's up ahead. To see someone so young throw everything away like that is nothing short of tragic..." -Rolando Celestia, Reina's father

**TW: Mild body horror, eye injury mention, Ommetaphobia**

III. Retaliation

A powerful Curse that triggers on its own when the individual commits an act deemed unforgivable. The Curse mutates the person's body into a state that will permanently remind them of the innocent(s) they chose to harm. Merula's trait would turn out to be roses that grew out of and replaced her left eye. Thanks to her irrational hatred toward Reina, Merula also despised roses because of their association with the former. She would destroy every last one on sight if she could. Imagine her dismay at having to look at them whenever she stood in front of a mirror. Not that trying to remove them would do her any good. She'll never be allowed to forget what she has done.

"She didn't even try to hide those roses growing out of her face. Either she couldn't, or simply didn't care. Perhaps she did that to herself in a vain attempt to ruin Reina's reputation ever further? The timing between the incident and Merula's new look was no coincidence. Although Rowan confirmed that Curse wasn't contagious, just about everyone avoids Merula like the plague."

IV. Seal of The Condemned

A powerful Curse that triggers on its own when the individual commits an act deemed unforgivable. The seal is a circular sigil that appears on the person's torso, where the Soul is believed to be located. This officially marks the user's Soul as condemned and forfeited to the Demons, who waste no time in beginning their torment of the target. Bearers of the mark give off an aura that warns all beings around to steer clear of them, causing animals to run away and people to feel intense dread toward the individual. The seal is only visible to the bearer, Demons, and those who use a simple vision spell to locate it.

"Barnaby and Ismelda told us how they'd see Merula muttering to herself and acting rather off lately, as though she's seeing and hearing things no one else can. Rowan looked into it and told us the type of Curse it was...I've never heard of Curses being earned before. Now it makes perfect sense why Mr. Celestia chose not to press charges."

~~~~

#my art #hphm #hogwarts mystery #hphm au #merula snyde #hphm merula #cursed merula

[dweetwise]

[Riconti] Coffee weather

For the "Seasonal food/drink" square in my Riconti October bingo! Rating: G Word count: 1.3k ao3 link

This was a terrible date.

Ace’s skin was damp from sweat and rain, his previously unused sneakers already chafing as he dragged his feet through wet leaves and mud and expected to slip any second.

Oh, and his date just kept walking ahead on the stupid hiking trail at an inhuman pace.

"Hey, c'mon," Ace complained, already out of breath. "Wait up!"

"Hurry up," Felix said, not even turning to look at him. "We're almost there."

"Just hold on—shit," Ace cursed as he nearly stumbled over a root. "This sucks."

"We've only been hiking for fifteen minutes," Felix said.

"Yeah, fifteen minutes of pure, uphill cliffside!"

"It's not even steep," Felix huffed. "You can rest once we're at the top."

"Easy for you to say, with your young, spry, mountain-climbing body—"

"It's only a small hill,'' Felix protested.

"Might as well be Everest," Ace huffed.

Felix snorted but at least he finally stopped. Ace groaned and leaned against a tree, panting to catch his breath.

"Wow, I'd forgotten what dying feels like," Ace said.

Felix rolled his eyes. "You're being dramatic."

"I'm old," Ace protested.

"You're not," Felix said. "But maybe now you'll consider joining me at the gym sometime."

"If this is some evil, mastermind plot to get me to work out—"

Felix huffed. "Come on, that's enough of a break."

"Ugh," Ace groaned as he pushed himself off the tree and continued walking. "Don't worry about date night, Ace, he said. I've got it all planned out, he said. You'll have fun, he said."

"And you said Oh, I love surprises!"

"I should've realized once you got out those sneakers you bought for me," Ace sighed dramatically. "But no, I thought we were gonna play tennis or you'd teach me golf or something, you know, actually romantic, and not this torture—"

"If you spent more energy on walking instead of complaining, we'd already be there."

"Oh come on," Ace said. "I'll climb this stupid mountain for you, but I'm not going to be happy about it."

Felix winced. "Just a little further," he said, looking genuinely apologetic.

Shit, Ace didn't mean to actually make Felix feel bad. Sure, he might hate hiking, but he'd put up with much worse for Felix's sake, what with regularly taking hatchets and chainsaws to the face for him.

"Okay," Ace said. "But once we're there, I expect a proper goddamn break before I'm even considering hiking back down."

Felix smiled. "Deal."

It really was only another minute or so before the trees cleared around the top of the hill. Felix pulled Ace up one last, steep step—which Ace wasn't happy about, but at least it was more dignified than scrambling up on all fours—before they were greeted by a view over the Bavarian countryside.

Ace slumped down, his hands against his knees for support. “Finally!”

“Come on,” Felix urged, “let's find a place to sit down.”

Ace's legs trembled more than he would have liked as he followed Felix to a flat part of the cliff. Felix shrugged off his backpack and pulled out a blanket, spreading it over the wet rock.

Because no matter how insistent Felix had been on this hike, the fact remained that neither of them were nature people. Merely imagining Felix getting a bug in his sweats and the screaming that would ensue brought a smile to Ace’s face.

Finished setting up their resting spot, Felix wordlessly held out a water bottle for Ace.

“Thanks,” Ace said and unceremoniously flopped down on the blanket.

While Felix shuffled to sit beside him and kept rifling through his backpack, Ace gratefully gulped down water while taking in the view.

They weren't as high up as the torturous incline would have suggested, but Ace could still see miles of sprawling countryside even with the overcast weather. The wind was stronger up here and the gentle rain wasn't unwelcome on his heated skin. The only sounds apart from Ace's heavy breaths was the rustling of fallen leaves and the muted sounds from traffic down on ground level.

It was actually kind of nice.

“Here,” Felix said.

Ace turned to see that Felix had laid out a small picnic on the blanket. There was a thermos and the smell of coffee in the air, with two paper cups, spoons as well as a see-through container of something…beige, and mushy, and…

Felix popped the lid off of the box and as Ace saw the sprinkled espresso powder on top, his smile widened.

“You brought tiramisu?” Ace asked, excited for his favorite dessert. “When did you even have time to go to a bakery?”

“This morning." Felix frowned into the container. “Though the cake didn’t seem to survive the trip very well.”

“Oh, who cares?” Ace said, gingerly grabbing a spoon. “It’s the thought—and the taste—that counts!”

“You’re right.” Felix smiled and set the container down between them.

Ace didn’t hesitate to scoop out a big spoonful of tiramisu mush while Felix poured them coffee. Once the taste of chocolate, coffee and cream exploded in his mouth, Ace let out a filthy moan.

“God,” Ace said. “I don’t know if it’s the mountain air or what, but this tastes fucking amazing.”

Felix chuckled. “We’re only 60 meters high.”

“Don’t care.” 

Taking a sip from the mug Felix handed him, Ace could recognize the taste of freshly-ground beans. Felix had really gone all out.

“Damn, this sure beats a granola bar as far as hiking snacks go,” Ace said. He took another bite of cake and washed it down with good espresso. “I’m dangerously close to starting to enjoy the outdoors.”

“I’m glad,” Felix said, before looking down at his cup. “I, ah… I wanted to thank you.”

“For complaining twenty minutes straight as soon as we stepped out of the car?” Ace asked.

“No,” Felix huffed. “For coming with me.”

And then he was reaching over and placing his hand on Ace’s, with one of those small, gentle Felix-smiles that always made Ace weak in the knees.

“I know you don’t like hiking,” Felix said. “But you still came with me and walked all the way to the top. I’m happy we could do this together.”

“Aww, pumpkin,” Ace crooned, the dessert momentarily forgotten as he clasped Felix’s hand in both of his. “If dragging my ass up some hill makes you happy, you can be damn sure I’m doing it every time. I might complain a little—or a lot—but I hope you know I don’t mean it. More than anything, I just love spending time with you.”

Felix’s hand squeezed Ace’s, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he smiled. “Me too.”

Unable to resist, Ace leaned in for a kiss. Felix hummed into it, gently tucking some of Ace’s damp hair behind his ear.

Yeah, Ace decided while kissing coffee-flavored lips and cupping Felix’s still-smiling face. Hiking truly wasn’t so bad after all.

—

Their break ended up taking longer than planned, due to Ace insisting on feeding Felix his half of the dessert and then listening to Felix critique some ugly, modern houses they could see from up here. But Ace didn’t mind in the slightest; the blanket was surprisingly comfortable to lounge around on, the coffee was warm, and Felix looked so genuinely happy.

And then Felix stood and said “Okay, let’s get ready to head back down” and Ace groaned in dramatic suffering because he’d forgotten he was still expected to move.

“Okay, next date night?” Ace said. “I’m planning the whole thing, and the only exercise it will involve is walking from our couch to the front door to accept the food delivery.”

Felix chuckled. “I’m looking forward to it.”

#riconti #ace visconti #felix richter #dweetwrites #dbd fanfic #dbd #dead by daylight #riconti october bingo

[baltears]

hello spookyshai!! its cool if u dont want to, but i was wonderin if you'd elaborate on what you like about william? i just like thinking about/mentally rewriting westworld and its characters in my free time, and your fascination with william's got me fascinated, mostly bc i see him as a stinky bastard. so obvs you'd definitely have a more nuanced take on him, which i'd also like to develop for the imaginary westworld rewrite fic that i'm never going to write ;)) regardless if u answer or not, just wanted to say i'm a fan of your blog and i hope you're havin a good day!!

omg so first of all thank you so so much for sending this, especially asking unprompted about a character you don't even like and giving me a chance to explain my feelings about him which is just incredibly cool of you. i love and am obsessed with william so giving me any excuse to talk about him at length is like gifting me $1000. if you want to know more about my meta thoughts about him after reading this, (I'm gonna talk A Lot – sorry – but i can't possibly get through everything because he's just a very complicated guy and it's a very dense show), you can always look in my william tag. I have a lot of text posts about him, but I also often talk a lot in the tags of my own posts as well as reblogs. This is gonna be a lot of totally disorganized and unedited infodumping of a lot of different meta, but i've talked about all of it at length elsewhere too and I can also totally elaborate more if you have any specific questions (you could send another ask if you wanted, but also feel free to just message me about it anytime). I'll do my best not to get too emotional (lol) but it'll be tough because this character is so close to my heart. but I'll try!

this is a huge wall of text lol so i'll also be adding more bold and italics than i normally would just to make it a little easier to read.

so first of all let's be clear, he completely is a stinky bastard. he is a horrible, awful, faithless, pathetic specimen of a man. not liking him is totally justified. just wanted to get that out of the way. personally I think not liking anything for any reason is totally valid and justified, but there are certainly good reasons why a lot of people don't like william. he is not a good dude, at least not after a certain point. No one is obligated to relate to him, empathize with him, feel bad for him, whatever... like, no one's obligated to like anything, but especially this guy. sometimes people can get a little shirty about the fact that i do, like me liking him means i think they have to. I don't think that. I do love finding other william stans, and i am very unapologetic and open about my love for him, but him being widely hated makes complete sense to me.

sigh like why i love him so much though… it's kind of hard to even put into words. on one level it's just extremely personal, like, there are a lot of things about him that i really resonate with and identify with, although I know that sounds weird (it's definitely gotten some very shocked reactions before, lol). i'm a villain liker in general, i tend to be able to relate to those types of characters easily and it kind of takes a lot for me to really dislike one on a personal level (though that's true of any sort of character, i just tend to like the majority of the characters in any work that i genuinely enjoy regardless of how shitty they are – to me the only truly bad thing a character can be is annoying, like, the kind of annoying where you just want them off your screen). Characters being any degree of evil or shitty or problematic doesn't bug me at all, personally, I tend to feel no deep internal urge to have them 'held accountable' for the things they do, unless they exist in a narrative that genuinely doesn't seem to understand that they are in the wrong, which does irritate me when it happens. But anyway, I don't want to get too oversharey but there's definitely a very high level of just personal resonance to the character for me in terms of the kinds of conflicts he has, the things he struggles with, the dominant emotions of his life, etc. so that's part of it. also though he's just… a very complex and beautifully constructed piece of character work, so I also love him just on a technical level as a writer.

He has such incredible significance in the story too, being the thematic representative of humanity, both to dolores and to the wider narrative – his capabilities for good and evil are humanity's capabilities for good and evil, right. Dolores' opinion of humanity and feelings towards humanity are very colored by her opinion of him and her feelings towards him, and thematically their relationship is sort of a microcosm of the broader relationship between hosts and humanity and very much a central piece of the narrative. Even when it's out of direct focus it's being constantly referenced and pointed back to, such as with the caleb storyline in season 3 – caleb himself is basically one big callback to william in s3, parallels out the wazoo, and his function of turning around dolores' opinion on humans is very much related to him reminding her of william – hence why her storyline in season 3 ends with her remarking on how her memories of william as a young man indicate to her that humanity is capable of goodness, because caleb's capacity to choose echoes william's capacity to choose, caleb's goodness echoes william's goodness, it all goes back to that, etc.

So… I guess I'll just jump in lol. William's Thing, the fulcrum of his character, the main feeling or sentiment that underlies all of his evil actions and kind of his general turn away from the kind and gentle person he used to be, is alienation, right. He lives his whole life (as he tells dolores in 1x07) not fitting in anywhere, not making connections anywhere, not having any sort of community or any experience with love or companionship of any kind… he's just been totally alone and alienated his entire life. like, the closest thing he had to a friend was logan, and he hates logan. I think this is the major thing people miss about him – there's this perception that his turning evil was out of some form of entitlement, that he was just angry that this woman he liked didn't like him back and it's just an issue of wounded masculinity, but to me that completely misses the mark. Like yes wounded masculinity is a piece of his character (the way he performs and weaponizes masculinity in general is… really fascinating, I'll go into a bit more detail about it, but the kind of showy machismo that he displays is definitely a tool that he intentionally developed for his own use rather than a really integral part of who he is) but it's not at all the core emotion happening there.

To William, Dolores was not only a person he was in love with or a person he was attracted to. She was also his first and only genuine human connection ever. She was his first true friend, she was his first love, she was the first suggestion anywhere in his life that it was even possible at all for him to experience a sort of deep mutual understanding and care, that somebody could actually genuinely see him and let him see them. He literally just had not ever experienced any level of real emotional intimacy before, which is a feeling i actually think a lot of people relate to if they grew up feeling very lonely. And then ultimately not only was that relationship taken away, but it was kind of retroactively deleted. When he saw her again back in sweetwater, his thought was not, "i don't have this relationship anymore," but "i never had this relationship," and further, "the single person i've ever thought i could have this kind of relationship with is actually not capable of having any kind of relationship with anyone, including me, and i literally just made all of this up in my head." After losing Dolores he is not just sad and lonely – he literally comes to the conclusion that he can never have any kind of intimate human connection or be genuinely loved, ever, because the one person in his entire life he thought he connected with is not even a person at all, but just a thing. It's very much a rug pull moment on a level that's hard to describe, it kind of takes some thought-experimenting to get to that emotional place because it's a level of shock and hurt and betrayal and like, paradigm-shifting that most of us don't regularly experience (which I think might be part of the reason why a lot of people don't seem to really understand his character or be able to parse what's going on with him emotionally). Suffice it to say it's a wound deep enough that he was pretty much never going to recover from it.

After that happens he is completely destabilized, he loses all sense of meaning and self, and he never gets a grip on it again. He had totally reconstructed his idea of his life to include the genuine possibility of meaning, and meaningful relationships, when he met Dolores. And with the loss of her, all of that suddenly went away and he basically was just left with nothing. So that alienation that he grew up with is now not just a part of his life, not just a thing that he suffers from, but he starts to feel that it's inherent to him and that it comes from him, which is partly why we start getting all the anti-social behavior he displays later in life. He develops and kind of fosters that lack of empathy in himself not because he's truly incapable of empathy (as we see when he's a young man and at a couple of later points here and there, he is in fact very capable of it) but because he feels fundamentally cut off from other people – he can't reach them and they can't reach him.

So that fundamental sense of alienation is really what informs 90% of the things he does after that point. He starts building this persona, inside and outside the park. The real world feels meaningless to him at this point because the only hint of meaning he's ever had in his life was in the park, so he buys the park, and simultaneously starts trying to "win" at life in the real world like he would in the park. The real world honestly doesn't feel any more real to him than the park does, he just knows rationally that it's different and so he behaves differently outside the park… he builds all this wealth and power for himself, he becomes a famous philanthropist. Inside the park he starts creating this character for himself, this sort of hyper-masculine, hyper-competent, totally emotionally composed, merciless, badass villain. And he makes a very concerted effort to stay in this persona as often as he can.

It's all a performance, though, right. As early as 1x05 we have Ford pointing out (to his face! legend) that his barely-hidden desperation to find meaning in the park is giving the game away. In that flashback near the end of 2x02 we get a glimpse of what's underneath, because he's performing this cold, heartless persona in front of Dolores literally while his voice is shaking because he's having to try hard not to start crying as he's talking to her. Deep down he is still very wounded, he still loves her, he still desperately wishes deep down (as jimmi simpson explained) for her to just tell him that all of it was real, for her to be real and truly be a person the way he thought she was. When he's an older man that wish is still in there, it's just been buried very deep, covered up with a lot of other things, twisted. But it's always there, it's his most closely held desire, the only thing he truly wants, and it comes out all the time in the things he does. All his tormenting of dolores, and especially his desire to make the park "real" in order to find meaning – that's that. That sense of deep confusion that's always there in his character too, the constant inner monologue of "who am I, what does this mean, does anything mean anything, what is real or not real, what is going on," that's that too, that's his destabilized sense of self and reality and meaning that came out of losing Dolores. And by this point he has also come to feel, as he says in 2x09 to his wife, that there is something very fundamentally wrong with him, in a way that's kind of at odds with how we as the audience have historically understood him.

The thing is, we saw him be a kind, loving, gentle, thoughtful person. He certainly was not perfect, for instance his later narcissism started out as a sort of basic self-centeredness, but he was a fundamentally good-hearted person who put most of his energy into trying to do the right thing. But he starts saying that he feels like that wasn't the real him, that he thinks deep down he was evil and poisonous all along, that his turn to darkness was inevitable, and that there's a sort of helplessness to his evil. There's this deep sense of shame that permeates his character along with his loneliness and alienation and resentment. He hates everything, he hates the world, but above all he hates himself – kind of amusing considering the god complex he's developed over time. But that really does seem to be the underlying emotion, that he truly thinks that deep down he was always bad. It's very heavily implied that his philanthropy outside the park and his attention to his family, his kind of good-guy persona, is something that he constructed to try and make up for his true nature, and all but stated that he doesn't feel like he's succeeded. To him, no amount of good he does will ever balance his level of evil, evil that as he says doesn't come from anything he's done but something deeper than that, something immutable, something he is. So that's why we eventually have him getting to the point of going "I might as well not bother with this anymore. I might as well just be evil, because I can't change what I am."

I've also said in other posts that the things Juliet says to him come off as obviously abusive. Like, she's technically correct that there's some sinister things going on with his private life, but listen to how she says it. You're a virus, not a person, a thing that mindlessly infects and destroys and has no other purpose. And he agrees with her! He doesn't question it at all, he just says, yes, you're exactly right, I'm not a human being with good and bad attributes, or potential to do both right and wrong. I'm a virus. Like, again, I know people get weird about having empathy for villain characters, there's the whole "cool motive, still murder," thing, because we don't want to be excusing anyone's bad actions with a sad backstory (personally I don't really care, but I understand where the concern comes from). But when he said that to Juliet it just… like I don't know how else to put it, it broke my heart. He really believes that about himself. And later he starts to question it because he's not sure anymore if he actually chose to do any of the things he did… but the way his hallucination of Emily puts it, these are his two options: you are evil, or you had no choice. One or the other. He never puts aside the idea that he is a monster that does not deserve to live, and his suicidality persists from season one (when he encourages Dolores to shoot him in the head and reacts with honest disappointment when she can't) to the end of season four when he actually does manage to engineer his own death. He is deeply, agonizingly, pathetically miserable existing the way that he is, he seems to see his even being allowed to live at all as some sort of cosmic injustice. But he doesn't know how to change back to the way he was.

All that having happened, though, we also keep getting these repeated suggestions in the story that he actually is still capable of goodness somewhere in there. The narrative keeps asking what William is exactly, what his fundamental nature is, and keeps refusing to land on one answer, instead choosing to keep things ambiguous in a way that would be sort of odd for your garden variety villain. In 2x04 we see him experiencing regret, feeling empathy and pain on behalf of others, and acting genuinely heroic, only to later backtrack and say it didn't mean anything. In 2x09 Emily tells him he is in his essence "a lie" but makes no attempt to locate what the "truth" of him would then be. In 3x06 he tries to figure out the answer to what's going on with him again only to decide he still doesn't really know, in 3x08 we get this reminder that he still stands for Dolores as a representation of both humanity's evil and its goodness, in 4x05 when his host duplicate asks him what he is, he says "Jury's still out." He is too far down his current path to turn back, but he still does not and cannot definitively and finally choose evil, because despite his self-loathing it seems like he senses deep down that his other side is still in there. All that to say I think he's getting a redemption arc in season 5, if we get a season 5 – season 5 is supposed to be the do-over season, and the character who most desperately needs and could most benefit from a do-over is William.

Um, closing thoughts… I think he's really funny. Sometimes intentionally, like, I do laugh at his little quippy comments, but I also just think it's really funny how pathetic he is and what a mess he is and how he basically imploded his entire life on accident. I do feel a lot of very genuine care and empathy for him (obviously), but he's also such a garbage fire of a human being that you sometimes just have to laugh. He's just my funny little guy, also he sucks, also I love him and he's my lil angel, also he's the worst man ever in history and deserves to be drawn and quartered (said with love). You get it. :) There's dimensions.

Trying to think of other characterization notes for your imaginary fic… oh, did you notice he puts on an accent in the park? He does this fake Southern drawl when he's playing his park character, but it's not his real accent and he drops it at other times, kind of like how Dolores sometimes does or doesn't use her "rancher's daughter" accent when she's being Wyatt in season 2. Uh… Total nerd, at heart, seeing as "all he had as a kid were books." (I kind of suspect that childhood memory might not have been totally real, by the way… made a post about that recently that's a little ways down in my tag if you're interested.)

There are more things I could say, but I think I've probably gone on long enough for the one ask lol so I'll cut it off here. Thank you again, so much, for sending this. I hope you enjoyed and got something out of this response, but if not I still do very much appreciate you asking and being curious. I hope you had a great day too!

#westworld #his brain is a conference call #william westworld

[sortyourlifeoutmate]

Even in terrain as thick with disingenuous nonsense as anything about the Russian invasion of Ukraine this is taking the piss.

The idea that any peace deal that could have been struck would have been done 'on terms favourable to Ukraine' is a joke, and seems to be doing a lot of work to ignore a fairly significant player in the war - one you might struggle to see mentioned up there. You know? The invader? Russia? Those guys?

Seriously, from the wording you'd think Ukraine was fighting ghosts just because America told them to.

Like, you can't come out and expect to be taken seriously if what you're offering is "Just surrender a little bit, just a tiny bit! Just give up a little bit of your land! Not all of it! Just these chunks here. Just give them to the people who invaded and we'll call this square."

That's not favourable terms! You are a fucking shill! Argh!

Bonus:

This was an unrelated post and plays into that cannard of "The US lied about X - what makes you think they're telling the truth about Y?" and while it started with the fairly legit gulf of Tonkin incident (which was, at best, a severe failure to double-check something that was obviously sketchy and at worst knowingly lying) and then leads up into the shit you can see there.

Motherfucker, Russia INVADED. I don't know if you missed that part. Lied about Russian aggression my left testicle. Mariupol is, at present, ninety-five percent ruins and five percent fucking Russians coming in and trying to turn the ruins into a tourist destination. Lied about Russian aggression - you're having a fucking laugh.

And also, Assad did use chemical weapons, and I'm really not sure why you feel the need to defend him in the first place. Secondly, why are you defending Syria as a sovereign nation? Know who else is a sovereign nation? Ukraine. Or because they're friends with the US and not Russia do you feel they don't count?

Jesus Christ.

See, this is what annoys me about these people. They got suspicion on the US down, fine. You should be suspicious of the US, they've done some heinous shit. But then they seem to forget that just about every fucking state has done - and is doing, and does - heinous shit because that's how these things function.

Like, how else do you wind up at "Oh, the US is evil but Russia is on the level"? Are you fucking high? They're all bad! In different ways! In different ways you have to assess on a case-by-case basis! You dumbfuck!

Argh! People! You fucking idiots! What is wrong with you?!

[agapi-kalyptei]

pancake recipe, 2018 version

this is (intentionally, autistically) way too long, but here's a verbatim copy of my facebook post where I detail my pancake recipe. I'll probably make amends later, since I made a few hundred more pancakes since then after all.

---

Several of my friends have now said that my pancakes are "the best they've ever had" and I refuse to take that as a hyperbole, so here goes: Milan's ultimate pancake guide.

(Content warning: Marie-Isabel said "your pancakes are pretty crêppy" - so I'm not going to talk about those other 398 variants of pancakes - you figure those out later. We're talking crêpes and vegan crêpes. Half-assed vegan recipe at the bottom.)

First of all - this is dumb. Just add flour, eggs and milk together and that's it. Boom. Done.

But just in case you like an uncomfortable level of detail:

Flour: Regular fine ("half-coarse") wheat flour works the best (marked in Estonia as 405 - for the love of God, please do NOT use 550; these are known in central Europe as 'ultra fine' or '00'). The results will be *radically* different for every flour you try. Buckwheat flour will make the pancakes break the moment you look at them. Ultra fine will make them taste undercooked and chewy. Other, esp. gluten-free flours will just mean you'll need to improvise - please do experiment and let me know your experiences, mostly it just means you'll need to make them a bit thicker.

Milk: Please do me a favor and use farm milk, organic milk, or at least unpasteurized, whole-fat milk (in Estonia they're marked as 3.8~4.2%). It doesn't matter that much, but it terrifies me when people go "OH NO FULL FAT MILK! WE"RE GONNA DIE!" like... you know, you'd have to drink a whole freaking liter of it, and the fat would literally do a hundred time less damage to your body than eating a row of milk chocolate. (I'm gonna skip whether milk is good for you or not, you already know your opinion.)

Eggs: Obviously, I'm going to say "get those expensive organic eggs". Please do, really. Hens are treated abysmally in most places. As a rule of thumb, you can tell how stressed a hen was by how thin the eggshell is. In Europe, eggs are marked with a number, a country code, and a serial number. For the first number, "0" means organic, "1" means free range, "3" means devil's torture chambers. So for example "3EE123456" on an egg means you've just supported evil capitalist overlords and comrade worms in Marx's grave are wiggling in discomfort.

Oil: Obviously use oil with a high enough smoking point. Don't use virgin olive oil, that's just terrifying, and carcinogenic. And honestly, try to get one of those small (supposedly non-refillable, ha ha) oil spray bottles. They are *extremely* useful, esp. if you're clumsy like me and pouring from a normal oil bottle results in anything between 2 drops, and a testing ground for Noah's ark.

Obviously the other 2 basic ingredients that you should be taking for granted is salt and sugar. If you want to pick only one, pick salt. A pinch of it, obviously. Sugar with fat and without enough fiber is poison and you'd be wise to avoid it, but I usually cave in to popular demand and add a few spoons of brown sugar more for the color than taste. In all, practice moderation.

Secret ingredients: This is the fun part.

- Obviously, I use blueberry flour. Like, 2-3 spoons of it are enough for a batch.

- Add cinnamon freely.

- Add a vanilla extract if you're rich.

- Add sesame seeds to make it crunchier. (They float, so stir more than usual if you add them.)

The real fun is adding things no one expects, in tiny amount:

- Spanish Inquisition

- black pepper (ha ha, "I would never!!!", you say? Well, you probably ate my pancakes with black pepper, so dill with it)

- a hint of chili powder

- mint tea

- guarana powder

- maca powder

- honestly the trick here is to get people to drink and see how far can you push your luck, drunk people love any and all food

Now, the boring part! Preparation.

Put flour, eggs, a tiny bit of milk, some oil, salt, sugar, cinnamon &c together. Two eggs per half a liter of milk, approximately. If you bang two eggs against each other, only one will break [hi, Triin]. Careful about eggshells. Start stirring, and when it's obvious it's gonna be super thick, and a bit more milk, again and again. Not more than maybe 1/3 of the target volume of milk in total. Now stir it properly and completely - it should be thick, but not solid. This way you'll get rid of those annoying flour chunks. Don't forget the corners of the bowl. Once it's smooth, add a 1/3 more milk, stir, and when confident add the rest of it. Unless you know the ratios, add it slowly - you're aiming for liquid batter, but not too watery, not too thick. You'll get a hang of it, trust me. Obv it's easier to start thicker and then dilute.

Now, you need to know your stove, generally I aim for 6/10 or 2/3 heat, but obviously gas range stove = 💙. Preheat the pan, but don't ruin it. Be especially careful with ceramic pans - if it's darkened, it's ruined. You're a pan ruiner. You ruin puns. Spray it 6-12 times with oil, making diagonal lines - when the oil drops perk up and join, it's probably hot enough - if in doubt, put a drop of batter on oil - it should sizzle, but not scream.

When you're pouring batter, always fill up only about 1/2 of diameter and then immediately tilt the pan in a circle until it forms a pancake shape. Size matters - I find a 20cm pan to work best. You'll see, depends on your batter, pan, heat.

When you see the edges of the pancake get golden or brown, it's time to flip the f--- uh-- flip the pancake. If the middle of the pancake is still raw and almost liquid, you might have made it too thick. (It might work just fine.)

Don't believe the rumors that the first pancake is always weird. Lies and slander! Accidents happen, but the first pancake can be a valid member of the breakfast family. Circle the pan edges with a bent or curved spatula, get under the pancake, and... yep, it broke. Oh well. Now you have two, I guess. Flip them nevertheless, wait about 1/2 of the time it took to fry the first side, and then flip it again to make the first side crunchier if needed.

Flipping pancakes is lots of fun! It's not hard, I recommend everyone to try it. Describing it here is like telling you how to ride a bike - awkward - but I'll try: quickly wiggle the pan left and right to make sure it's done enough (the edges will lift off the pan), then keep the pan horizontal and push it back and forth, or in circles, without pushing the pancake over the edges, to see if it slides easily. If not, don't risk it - either give it more time, more oil, or just flip manually. If it slides effortlessly, push the pan away from you, and tilt the further end up 20-30 degrees. The rest.............................. is up to you. Good luck. (Hint: you can practice with a finished pancake with a cold pan if you're afraid of injuries.)

Adding jam: Obviously, there's only one good and holy way to spread jam on pancakes. Put it on the lower 40%, then fold from bottom to about a 1/3, then roll about 2cm from the bottom at a time. Also, the best ingredients together are vanilla sauce, dark chocolate cream, and a pistachio cream.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Vegan pancakes! They're a whole other can of... peas. And I honestly don't have a lot of experience. One thing I could never get done properly are banana-based pancakes. They're sticky and burn easily and... yeah. I'm sure some of you can make amazing banana pancakes, but not me. The best vegan pancakes I ever had were prepared by Annija - mineral water, wheat flour, flax seed flour, left in the fridge overnight, I think.

This is where I love to experiment though - last time I mixed wheat, hemp, chickpea, pea, potato+rice+corn starch/flour, salt, sugar, cinnamon, blueberry flour, water... and it kinda worked. If you like to play games on hard difficulty, then try to make gluten-free pancakes. Again, crushed flax seeds help a lot.

A lot of what I said about preparation of eggy pancakes still applies, but you're probably better off forgetting about flipping the pancakes unless you're really good at this.

Almond flour seems to add to the taste, but doesn't bind especially well. Coconut milk could help, but I don't have enough experience with it (I tried it in the last batch, but it had bananas and so was ruined - sorry everyone for that.)

You can safely ignore all plant-based milk - it adds nothing to the taste, and it will make pancakes burn easily.

So... any tips are welcome.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

tl;dr - just invite yourself over for pancakes, it's easier.

#pancakes #recipe #long post

[enigmaincrimson-personal]

I'll be honest as I can here and try to point out that past and recent events have left me rather reluctant and paranoid about approaching even partners that do talk to me when they can.

This is mostly due to poor or limited communication or... They have a partner on the list of people that don't particularly like seeing me around and I don't want to inadvertently push anything and give them more reasons to cause problems.

I know that my plots are plain terrible right now... Stress levels are high and my writing tends to go to crap when it happens. Partners keep ghosting me or dropping threads, but I feel like what I had tried to say was way too much as it was.

Admittedly, I don't think too highly of myself considering my general reputation on Tumblr is rather poor. I'm constantly worried that I might do something clumsy or stupid and hurt people as a result.

Maybe I don't deserve to have good people, but I wouldn't exactly know. I've never had a fair trial and there's nothing I can do to defend myself. Innocent or not, the results were already concluded before they started...

I wonder how many others are going through the same. However, I can't exactly save a drowning person if I am drowning myself.

I know that I am terrible with names... And I don't like recalling the names of my accusers. It's too easy to falsify information and pretend that it's true these days... And they'd just twist the truth anyway, even if I could prove it in the end.

Besides, if I really did all those things they claim that I did... Why are they the only ones doing the very things they accused me of in the first place?

Yes, I know that I make mistakes just like everyone else, but to these people, there is no logic and reason other than their own, so the moment something exists that is contrary to their own ideas, they try to control it... And if that doesn't work, they try to kill it or suppress it.

They don't care about anyone other than themselves, they don't care about how their partners are feeling... It's all about keeping their own little world just how they like it... As it's lord and master... And to hell with someone that might change that.

Irony is that they accuse the other of doing the very things they are doing... Twisting the truth, hiding things, making it look like they were the victim, rallying anyone who supports them or is too scared to do otherwise... To "punish" someone for their supposed crimes.

It's a witch hunt disguised as a religious crusade... With neither ending well... A long trail of corpses.

All for what in the end?

Something as petty and banal as someone getting upset about someone else spelling "Color" as "Colour" making it sound like they were eating babies and trying to start World War 3.

I mean... Having a mutual partner as someone who decided that you were the Lord of evil because you can't draw anything freehand... Can just as easily get you accused of stalking them these days.

I'm not trying to dictate who or what you should do anything with or how, I just want you guys to be more careful. There's some serious nutters out there who are more than eager to set the entire site on fire if you do much as stand there and breathe in a way they don't like.

Not that I am perfect either... I have a tendency to get stand offish if I get the feeling that I might be too pushy with a partner.

On the other hand, I've been told I send too many messages by people who don't check the messages of their active blog for months and notice that I'm the only person that sent them anything at all on that time. Apparently, one was too much?

So generally... I don't know what the lines are because they seem to keep changing and these people seem like they want me to be some sort of psychic conduit that can somehow read their minds and guess what they want perfectly.

I'm sorry that For had no idea that you wanted me to magically realize that you had a fifty page application that I need to fill out before you'd give me the time of day. It wasn't in your rules and you didn't say anything.

Also, soft blocking really bothers me. Normally, I'd presume that Tumblr is being buggy again and it did the unfollowing, but I'd put it in the same category as Mutual only blogs not noticing you are there because the activity page can't be trusted... And neither can the rest of Tumblr itself.

If I haven't said anything... It's usually because I haven't noticed, I'm not sure what to say, or I don't exactly trust things well enough to say anything.

I'd keep on Rambling like this, but these posts don't usually fix anything and I've been up until 5:30 in the morning, so... I should stop.

#enigmaincrimson #ooc

[evilasiangenius]

Rewatching Good Omens again (comfort watching) means occasionally having some weird epiphanies like...

Brain: Have you noticed that Gabriel’s jogging outfit has some serious Costco Dad vibes with the sweats and the white sneakers?  He just needs the Kirkland Signature Dad Jeans as part of another outfit to go with those white sneakers and...

Thanks brain, I hate it.

So imagine this: Gabriel at Costco on a weekend afternoon, shopping for a new casual outfit and he runs into Beelzebub, Hastur, Ligur, and Dagon who are there to eat free samples and to inspect the local evil levels...

#archangel gabriel #beelzebub #good omens #good omens tv #ineffable bureaucracy #if you've ever been to costco on a weekend #you'd know those evil levels are really high #beelzebub does not eat free samples #and beelzebub is 1000% offended by gabriel's costco dad outfit #it is an abomination worthy of the deepest pits of hell #beelzebub probably shops at abercrombie & fitch #have you ever been in one? #it's like being trapped in the deepest pits of hell #dark; smelly; loud; disorienting... #every piece of clothing shaming you for having a normal human body #perfect for a prince of hell #beelzebub probably personally formulated their perfume/cologne #just walking by it would give me a headache #in fact just thinking about it now gives me a headache #asmodeus shops at american apparel

[nyerus]

Hello.....What do you think is the occupations of your fav TGCF characters in modern AU, nyerus?

Hello there Anon! Thanks for the fun ask! I love AUs, so here we go~

I usually envision Hua Cheng as a sort of artist, of course, but I also like him in other jobs that are reminiscent of his "ghost king" occupation. So like the owner of a casino or other big business -- as it suits the story and setting haha. He's pretty ruthless so naturally, he'd excel in situations like that too!

As for Xie Lian, this can vary a lot because I can see him in a lot of jobs. I really do like the idea of him being something like a florist or working with antiques, because both are callbacks to his "flower-crowned martial god" and "scrap-collecting god" titles. I also just think these jobs would bring him actual peace and fulfillment! <3 (Bonus that I often envision him opening up a charity once he has the means to do so, so he can help people as he always wanted.)

For some reason, I often envision Feng Xin working in security of some sort. Be it as a bodyguard or running one of those agencies that trains security personnel for venues and other things!

Oddly enough for Mu Qing, I like thinking of him as a teacher? Like for martial arts, but could be anything really. I think he'd be good in a role like that, though he's not the most patient person lol. Especially if it's moreso with younger kids, I think he wouldn't be so quick to yell or something, so it would be a good fit for him.

Shi Wudu of course would be running some sort of business empire, with Shi Qingxuan being like a celebrity or influence! I know it sounds kind of funny but I think that's a pretty obvious fit for them. Naturally, it can be tweaked for whatever the story setting is.

Ling Wen is fun because she can fit a lot of high-level roles very easily, since she's incredibly smart. Anything from the head of a government agency, to a spy. Very flexible depending on what type of role you'd want for her!

Very random with Yushi Huang, but I like her either as a head of a charitable organization, oooor as a fashion designer of all things. Pei Ming is awkwardly involved somehow, though he cares a lot more than she does, LOL!

And Jun Wu... ah, probably the usual of a "rich guy who seems nice on the outside but is actually evil" type of businessman. That role just fits him like a glove. A crime lord, too, but he'd have to appear as legitimate first.

Other characters can generally fill in the gaps as you need them (e.g. Yin Yu can be either Hua Cheng's assistant, or a spy for him, or some other ancillary role. Ban Yue can be related to one of Xie Lian's previous professions someway. And so on!)

#anon #asks

[jacscorner]

Princess Peach, The Royal Druid

Princess Peach in D&D would make for a good NPC. That would be leaving well enough alone. But Peach has been a playable character in a number of games, so I think it's only fair that she gets to be a potential player.

There's...actually a LOT better builds for Princess Peach if you wanted to capture a specific feel for Peach. Hell, if you REALLY wanna go in this direction, you should go the route Tulok the Barbarian went in his own Peach video. Won't lie, saw it a year ago and felt a bit deflated since part of what he did was what I wanted to do and had abandoned this since I didn't wanna be called a copycat.

But, eh, screw that. We just ended up coming to a similar conclusion, even if for different reasons. No shame in that. D&D is 90% inspiration anyway! Heck, this dumb 'Super Mario Campaign Setting' project is just playing stuffing Mario tropes and conventions into D&D.

So, since we built Mario and Luigi into D&D, it only makes sense we make a Playable Peach!

So, the reason Princess Peach is being built as a Druid is to go in line with what we've got for the setting if you followed the link up there; our Peach is the ruler of the Shiitake Hills, a series of hills covered in mushrooms as far as the eye can see.

And since canonically, Peach is served by mushroom creatures, naturally, I'm implying she's a Circle of Spore Druid. Being the latest of a long line of Spore Druids.

...And boom. I don't think I really need a big explanation for this. At least, I personally have no reason to put more options on the table. Peach hangs around the Toads, which in canon are Mushroom people, so her D&D Counterpart, ergo her class.

Peach, in this setting, would be a Lawful Good Elf. Probably a High Elf, the first born daughter of the Royal Druids. As such, it is her duty to learn the Druid Arts and carry on the tradition. Personally, I'd play it that the previous Queen and King was slain by the main villain of the campaign when she was young, leaving her to be raised by her Halfling Attendant and being taught the arts for the council of Druids who serve as the Queen's advisors when she becomes of age. There, clean cut, and gives someone who can run the kingdom while Peach is away, but doesn't take away her level of authority. All in a nice, pink bow.

Though, if you wanna multiclass, or perhaps wanna go for a 'Peachette' build, as the Princess' younger sister who goes on adventures instead since 'Peach' herself is too valuable, then here's a few suggestions.

01. Cleric

This is the one I originally would've gone with if not for my Shiitake Setting. Peach IS a healer in Super Mario RPG, so I think it makes sense for her to be a Cleric. I'd think Life Domain, which for our Shiitake Hills setting, would be either Avus or Mater (or Eldstar and Mama of the Star Spirits, lol).

02. Sorcerer

So Peach definitely has some kind of magical power. I don't think Peach is the 'ditzy blonde' type, but I don't think Peach is cracking open old tomes and learning witchcraft. Ergo, she's probably a Sorcerer, being born with her magical powers.

I'd think Divine Soul, but could you IMAGINE if she was of Draconic Bloodline? That'd be so scandalous~ And could be an interesting plot line...

03. Bard

Peach is charismatic. She's cute, she's eloquent; people like Peach. You'd be hard pressed to find people who don't like her.

Well, except this guy.

But yeah, for the most part, everyone wants Peach! I'd imagine College of Glamour. Though, you could play her up as a ditz as a cover for a College of Lore or Whispers. Just a fun little idea for RPing.

04. Warlock?!?!?!

Yeah, this is more of a fun one, but this is based on that one time Peach got possessed by the Shadow Queen in Paper Mario: Thousand Year Door.

I don't know, I just think this is more of a funny possibility. Cause there's so many different ways to play this one. Do you wanna go full Goth, Bad-Bitch Princess? Or how about someone trying to hide the sinister nature of their powers? Is she cursed? Maybe cursed during the adventure and so it's mechanically supported by getting those Warlock powers? Or did she make a deal with this evil entity? Does she have a bubbly outer shell, hiding a more sinister personality?

Well, I think that's everything I wanted to talk about!

#Super Mario Campaign Setting #DnD #Princess Peach #Super Mario #Nintendo #Dungeons and Dragons #Dungeons & Dragons #D&D #DND #Druid #Character Concept

[bloodysimpsonchibi]

Freddy Critiques the Other Slasher's dreams

It's about time I do another list for Halloween so here it is. Freddy Krueger, as I'm sure all of you know, is infamous for his ability to invade other people's dreams. So what if he used that ability to see into his fellow slasher's dreams (Without killing them of course.)

1. Jason

What can I say? The Hockey Puck's dreams really aren't anything special. They're mostly about his childhood and his mother, how she was always taking care of him, protecting him. Of course, he has nightmares about the day he drowned as well as the night he saw his mother decapitated. Always a riot!

2. Leatherface

Bubba's a lot like Hockey Puck in many ways and his dreams are no different. Only they're about his family back in Texas and the way they would bust his chops. There seems to be some level of love there, not that I give a shit. That being said, he also has this really weird reoccurring dream where he's a Japanese school girl...........I don't know either man.

3. Michael

HOLY SHIT!! WHAT THE FUCK!!! I KNEW THIS GUY WAS EVIL BUT HIS DREAMS ARE ON A WHOLE ANOTHER LEVEL. BLACK! EVERYTHING IS BLACK! EVERYTHING IS DEAD!!! I NEVER WANT TO GO BACK! WHAT THE HELL IS MYERS!?

4. Jigsaw

Guy either dreams one of two things. Being all happy and shit with his wife and non-dead baby or putting us other slashers in his stupid traps to "teach us a lesson about killing for fun." (Ok boomer.) He also sometimes dreams of Billy being alive but those really just amount to watching him fall off his tricycle again and again.

5. Chucky

Little bastard dreams about all kinds of things, mostly having to do with murder. There's also sex dreams about Tiffany, sex dreams about Jennifer Tilly, and one sex dream about a female version of himself. Dreams are weird like that.

6. Pinhead

Dreams about Hell obviously, creating new cenobites and all that bullshit. That being said, he also dreams about this hot bitch named Kristy and about this old dude named Elliot. Wonder what that's about.

7. Ghosface

You know, you'd think you'd be able to uncover someone's identity by going into their dreams but somehow, this crafty bastard safeguarded his identity against me! I don't know how he did it but no matter how hard I try, I can't get into his memories. What the actual fuck? Besides that, he dreams about killing people and scary movies. Also sex dreams with that bitch Sidney. (Like that'll ever happen.)

8. Pennywise

Dreams about eating children of course. Also has these nightmare about a fucking turtle for some reason. They seem to freak him out a bit. I might have to use that against him.

9. Carrie

Ah, sweet sweet Carrie. Sure she has those boring dreams about Jesus and being in high school but most of the time, she dreams about her prom night and then crucifying that bitch of a mother with kitchen knives. It's always fun to see.

10. Freddy

Oh ho ho! No no little piggies. You won't get into Freddy's head that easily but if you want, and you beg nicely, Freddy might invade some more dreams for ya! Until next time! Oh and Happy Halloween!!! AHAHAHAHAHA!

#freddy krueger #halloween #dreams

[certifiedceraunophile]

Hello! I’m your Klaroline Swap gifter👀 I am sorry it's taken me this long to reach out but I've finally gotten to it! I am excited to be writing for you and wanted to ask a few questions about your gift. Wanted to know about your all-time favorite tropes and side pairings? Any Caroline friendships you like? Any tropes or pairings you don't like? Any pet peeves with KC fic? Any smut preferences? Anything you especially want to see or any info you'd like me to know? Hope you have a great day!💖

Heyyy!! Thank you for sending me this ask, and please don't apologize, it’s all good 💖 I hope you're having a great day too! So I’ll just jump in and answer all your questions ✌🏾✨

I am so so sorry it got this long, like so long, I really tried to condense it, but I have no concept of short and concise so now I have to put this below a cut 😭🙃😭

All time favourite tropes:

[see here's the thing I dont exactly *know* what tropes are so I'm just gonna yeet a bunch of HIGHLY specific prompt-thingies that make me tingle at you and you can do w them what you wish- like take out certain parts you want to use, or base other tropes off of them anything you wish really, even if you choose to ignore all of them I won't be holding it against you dw!]

Ok so I love love the "I was just captured by the bad guys and very harshly uh demanded to sell you out, but I didnt, bc even though I might posture like you’re the scourge of the earth and would gladly see you dead, I in fact, do not want you dead and will therefore not be selling you out and will handle mild -emphasis on mild please do not hurt either of my babies too much- torture instead and oops! look at that, you just overheard this exact exchange where I stand my ground and refuse to betray you, and now you’ve gone feral over your loyalty kink and are spouting promises of never letting go of me, which honestly I cannot bring myself to be mad at."

I love love love the forced bedsharing trope which then leads to accidental cuddling, where one party [caroline] is just very very annoyed that their body sought the warmth of a cockroach fucknugget being [klaus] and the fucknugget party is just very very smug about being the other party's personal space heater, and nuzzles them and cuddles tighter and asdfghjkl I'm getting tingly just thinking about it, and like says w a husky sleepy voice “don't move” and cuddles closer. jfc please I’m a basic bitch with very basic wants.

I absolutely LOVE the "we work on opposite enemy sides, but now we have to band together to defeat one common enemy and honestly I am NOT glad that I constantly wanna throw you against a wall, and not all reasons for said wall-throwing are strictly to inflict violence on you."

I also LOVE the "fuck youre bleeding/hurt/injured and fucking hell I dont know why my hands are shaking while I attend to your wounds but god it is, and now I'm not sure exactly how deep you've furrowed into my heart and stuck yourself there like a dickheaded leech."

Now I feel like I have given you many tropes, but I also feel like i didnt in fact help you at all, bc I'm not sure these are uh tropes?? but anyway those are some highly specific...scenes?? I have a very deep bias for

[you obviously dont HAVE to write ANY of them if you dont want to]

And also if I had to give you a clear cut trope to follow, I absolutely LOVE the enemies-to tentative allies-to lovers trope, in which one party is just working really really hard to get to the lovers part, and the other is working really really hard not to get to the lovers part, but caves later on, bc really the fucker grows on you. [Featuring Klaus as the "high key besotted already pursuing Caroline"-person, and Caroline is the "I am very very annoyed w this wooing, but I am more annoyed this wooing is working"-person. And also, I like my Klaus E V I L, But really really really *soft* for Caroline.]

Also if by tropes you meant settings, Like AU's, literally anything works, I have a personal bias for Crime AU's when it comes to enemies to lovers, and Canon is the ultimate enemies to lovers AU, but honestly you can use which ever one you want, I am not entirely sure myself if I have a specific preference here, AH, Fantasy, Supernatural, Scifi, it's all good.

[I however am not extremely fond of Historical Settings]

Again you are not required to follow any of these tropes at all if you don't wish to, I just require you to have a lot of fun writing and love the beauty you write yourself first!

Side pairings:

Ok I LOVE me some Kennett [kol + bonnie] but I also LOVEEE kolenzo [Kol and Enzo], I also am extremely just *heart eyes* at Bonenzo [Bonnie + enzo], but I absolutely DIE for Kennettzo [which is OT3 of Kol Bonnie and Enzo]

Kalijah is also a-ok w me, and I feel like I dont have any other side pairings I'd like die to see I guess. If you choose not to go with these side pairings its perfectly alright.

Caroline Friendships:

Ok this I can answer without rambling like an idiot, I love love love love :

Bonnie + Caroline [like i love this so much it physically hurts me, they both deserve so so so much better]

Kol + Caroline [I will literally touch a frog, and I have a phobia of frogs, to have one full conversation w these two idiots]

Enzo + Caroline [Honestly enzoline brotp makes me wanna sob happy tears bc they are so perfect together]

Katherine + Caroline + Rebekah [bad bitch meets head bitch meets super bitch, what could possibly go wrong]

Tropes and Pairings I dont like:

NOTPS:

Kolvina, stebekah, delena, stelena, datherine, steferine, Haylijah, Marcel+Rebekah, Matt+Rebekah, Bamon, Kai+bonnie, beremy.

And I think that's about it? mostly I just hate elena stefan damon and hayley and I am not fond of them w anyone, I hate all canon Rebekah relationships, and I dont like seeing Bonnie with anyone other than enzo or kol.

Tropes:

I am totally not fond of the Kill Liz for plot reasons trope, like seriously killing Caroline's mom is not ok w me, but I am totes fine if she's like already dead as part of Caroline's backstory, just don't show me Liz dying in the story as a part of the plot.

Any form of sire-bond-y or like sire-bond adjacent or like any form of deal/bargain/agreement that gives Klaus even a tiniest bit of power over Caroline's free will and choices, is just not for me, like at all, no matter how well it's done, I can't stand it.

not fond of any form of prisoner/hostage tropes, like klaus kidnapping caroline or caroline kidnapping klaus and holding each other hostage and stuff like that.

Death as a plot point doesnt work for me? and really I'd prefer if there were no major character deaths at all.

Friends to lovers trope is not for me, childhood friends to lovers trope is definitely not for me.

I don't like any sort of redemption arc really, anything that starts with Klaus as a “bad” dude and ends with him being a relatively “good” dude is not for me.

Any form of infidelity, like ofc especially in between Klaus and Caroline is just [shudder] hard pass, but like I also hate it when Caroline or Klaus cheat on anybody at all.

Also all the tropes and like themes I'm not comfy w that I mentioned in my original Gift Request still stand.

KC Pairing Pet peeves

ok This I can answer easily bc I have like a FEW,

I hate a woobified Klaus so much, like so much, I hate all TO!Klaus characterizations but this one is the worst, absolutely not here for it, I am not here to feel sorry for this mf I want to feel really deliriously GIDDY at how evil he is and how whipped he is for Caroline, but like concentrating on Klaus's manpain is not something I really wanna read.

Caroline excusing Klaus's bullshit, or like being a push over-y “it's ok, I understand why you did it” person is not for me, bc she never was one to begin w, she never did rationalize or justify Klaus's behaviour, she always held him accountable and told him what a difficult son of a bitch he is every chance she got.

I don't like arcs where Caroline is Klaus's redemption? like Caroline bringing Klaus into the "light" or whatever I am not here for it, like at all, I like Klaus staying evil while being endlessly in love with Caroline, and Caroline being able to be w a man she knows is a selfish evil ruthless grade A asshole, but will literally also choke himself to death for Caroline, cuz the man is whipped as fuck.

I also absolutely am not a fan of arcs where like Caroline remains "pure" or whatever, like that's just not for me, I am totally fine, actually MORE than fine for ruthless Caroline who is willing to do deplorable shit to get to her goal and protect her people, like Caroline being extremely almost evilly pragmatic just gives me a boner, and pretty sure gives Klaus one too. Klaus "protecting" Caroline's so called innocence is uh off putting for me personally. And her remaining this pure white light princess of good and Klaus being attracted to the *good* in her is um, nope.

Smutty Preferences

Honestly I’m very easy when it comes to smut [and u totally dont have to write me any if you dont want to]

I do not like:

non con/dub con, anal sex, Strict and/or elaborate Bdsm themes, [light undertones are ok], drunk sex, sex that’s basically infidellity [like caroline/klaus cheating on someone else w each other] , gagging, choking, Extremely rough emotionless sex, sex as a bargain, or as a part of a bargain.

Smut preferences:

I like reading oral sex, especially Klaus going down on Caroline

light bondage like being tied up [either Klaus/Caroline I enjoy both]

Sex toys are really really good, like love reading Klaus using one on Caroline, or Caroline using one on herself and Klaus watching

I do have a special love for praise kink, especially Klaus being really just in awe of Caroline during the do and expressing it uninhibitedly

Dirty Talk is GREAT

I enjoy both Klaus and Caroline in a dominant role, but I usually love it when both of them share the dominance equally, I’m just not into “Yes master” and “Yes mistress” level of dominance. I guess the word I’m looking for is Vanilla dominance lmao.

Bloodplay is also great if they're vampires.

And Klaus and Caroline leaving marks on each other is *swoon*.

I love reading possessive!klaus and possessive!caroline in equal measure so really your choice.

Hot and Dirty sex with a an undercurrent of emotion and devotion, want and need and all that nice stuff is great!

But I do have a list of words I’m not really a big fan of coming across when I’m reading smut:

Any word for vagina that’s not wetness, or folds or lips, is squicky, cunt is not a problem, pussy however is squick.

Clit is clit; little nub, bundle of nerves, all of that makes the med student in me really anxious lmao.

Any word for Cock that’s not cock is squick.

Juices, cream, semen are squicky, I just prefer come or release.

Ok these are seemingly innocent words but moist, engorged, gaping, drooling, sopping are not words I like seeing in context of smut.

So yeah that’s about it, I know hi, it’s been what, eleventy bajillion years since the beginning of this ask, I am so so so sorry for being this difficult, and really, LIKE SERIOUSLY, except for my squicks you are more than welcome to just skip past everything else, since I’m not really that hard to please, as long as the no-no’s are not there in what I read and the dynamic I asked for is even just vaguely followed I will be really really really happy and really I just want you to have fun writing whatever you feel like cooking up, I’m superrrr excited to see your interpretation of my request!!!

[Also Please please send me another ask clarifying you got my answer and also telling me I haven't frightened you with this long ass rambling list of okay’s and no-no’s bc honestly I am just anxiously debating if I should answer this ask like this or yeet half of it and vaguely rewrite the answer.]

Hope you have a great day lovely!! I am once again sorry for being this difficult. ✨💖🤝🏾

#kc sweet swap #anon ask