Tumgik
#you think you kill a guy and then you see him on the balcony during a trial for his own murder
dearestgojo · 1 year
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Summer Days
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Gojo x fem reader x Geto
A/n: This was originally supposed to come out during the summer for my summer Collab, but I lost inspiration until recently so here you go. Also this is heavily influenced and inspired by "Y Tu Mama Tambien" which is a movie i really enjoy.
Warnings: 18+. Some angst. Pwp. Three different smut scenes. Reader has long hair which is then cut short. Dubcon. Use of condoms. Oral m & f receiving. Cunnilingus. Fingering (there's vaginal and anal). Outdoor sex. Public Sex. Cowgirl. Riding. Throatfucking. Nipple Play. Deepthroating. Handjobs. Blowjobs. 69 position. Spit. Squirting. Overstimulation. Breeding Kink. Multiple Orgasms. Threesome. Cockslapping. Dumbification. Grinding. Pussy job. Rimming. Double Penetration (one-hole). Anal. Male x male stuff. Geto and Gojo kissing. Creampies. Multiple Orgasms. Piss kink. Golden Showers. Dracyphilia. Cum swallowing.
Wc: 19k  | JJK Masterlist | Main Masterlist | AO3 | Moodboard
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Peering over the top of his sunglasses, Satoru raises a single finger and points in the general direction of the entrance to the venue, sifting his weight so that the front legs of his chair touch the ground. The movement and sound grab the attention of his best friend, who is leaning against his chair, his head resting on the back of it, legs raised off the ground and resting against the ledge of the balcony they were hanging out on. Suguru looks at Satoru, watching as he folds his arms over each other on the railing, chin resting on the back of his left hand, “What do you think she sees in him?” Satoru asks, “He’s way too old for her, so what exactly does she see in him? Do you think it’s the money? Or does she have daddy issues?” 
Suguru swings his legs off the ledge, copying Satoru’s stance looking down at where you're standing, arm hooked into Satoru’s uncle's arm, smiling at the guest that walks up to the two of you. You're standing up straight, smiling gently as always. He shrugs and pulls a cigarette from his pocket, “Maybe she’s into older guys because she has daddy issues.” 
They both stare down at you, watching as you weave between the crowd, your head turning to look around, searching for something. Satoru’s breath hitches when you find them perched on the balcony, your smile grows, and you lift a single hand to wave at them. You turn to his uncle, whispering in his ear before detaching yourself and making your way to the stairs that lead up to them. 
"She's coming," Suguru points out, killing the cigarette on the rail. Satoru nods and makes his way in the direction you would be coming in through. 
"Think we should invite her on our little summer trip?" He asks, running one hand through his hair. 
Suguru shrugs, "Do what you want. You always do anyway."
A few minutes later you show up, smiling at them both as they wait for you at the top of the stairs, offering their arms to you. "Hello, boys," you greet, a smile spread on your face as you hook your arms through theirs and let them lead you to the resting area, "It's good seeing you." 
Suguru pulls a chair out for you, leaning over your shoulder as you sit, "It's good seeing you too, y/n. Though seeing you wrapped around another man's arm was not exactly ideal." 
"So I should be hanging on to your arm?" You ask, peering over your shoulder at him and batting your eyelashes. 
Leaning closer to you, lips almost touching, Suguru beams, eyes twinkling as he teases back, "That doesn't sound too bad."
You grin up at him, shrugging your shoulder and turning back to look at Satoru, "What do you think 'Toru? In whose arms would I look better? Sugu's or your uncle's?"
Satoru leans, resting his elbows on his knees while smiling at you. He taps his lips with his pointer finger a few times like he is thinking about your question, "I think you'd look better wrapped in my arms."
You laugh waving both of them off in the end, "Oh you guys, you two really get off teasing me don't you?." You watch as Suguru moves to sit in the chair in front of you sitting next to Satoru, a glass coffee table separating you from them, watching the slit of the red midi dress you wear expose your thigh. "So what are you both doing for the summer?" you ask, leaning back on your hair to catch a glimpse of the party happening below. 
Satoru shrugs, leaning to rest on his knees, "A beach trip, of course," he sucks in some air, emanating a low whistle from his lips, "All those girls in their two pieces suits, and their skin glowing with sweat. And then all the beach parties."
Suguru's lips curve as he watches you shake your head in disbelief. An idea forms in the front of his brain as he recalls a rumor he heard from his mother's maid. He grabs the glass of whiskey he had placed on the table earlier, raising it to his lips and speaking with the rim placed against his bottom lip. "You should join us. I hear Gojo's uncle is going to be busy all summer." 
Your smile twitches and the brightness of your eyes dulls a little. Suguru can tell that you have already guessed what Satoru's uncle would be busy doing. Or rather who. The same person he spent time with when you were locked up in your room prepping for finals. But just as quickly as the brightness had dulled it returns. Your smile spread even wider as you attempt to cover your dissatisfaction with where your relationship with the older Gojo was going. 
"I'll think about it," you respond, "We haven't hung out in a while, so I think it'd be nice."
"Good because we'd love to have you. Right, Satoru?" Suguru smiles at you finally taking a drink.
Satoru nods his head, his brain still trying to untangle the underlying meaning of his friend's words and the quick switches in the atmosphere, "Yeah, it'd be fun." 
The three of you converse on the small balcony for a few more minutes, all avoiding the topic of your dating life, and sipping from the glass of wine Satoru had managed to sneak out of the kitchen. Towards the end of the night, you're seated between the two of them, your head resting on Satoru's shoulder as he mindlessly toys with your fingers. Your brain feels a little buzzed and you're hiccuping every so often, the sound causing a very wine-drunk Suguru to giggle every time. 
The sound of soft melodic music carries from downstairs, lulling you to sleep between your two childhood friends. The softness of the circles Satoru draws on your hand doesn't help as your eyes start to droop with sleep. 
You're already half asleep when you feel the hair sticking to your forehead get pushed back. Opening your eyes a little you find your boyfriend smiling at you, slightly tugging on your arm to pull you up. "You ready to go home?" he asks, cupping your face in his large hand as he sways you both. You nod your head, the back of your throat feeling too dry to respond verbally. "Good," he glances behind you, your movement had woken up the other two, "Thank you boys for entertaining my girl."
Satoru rubs his eyes, nodding and yawning, "No problem uncle. Spending time with y/n is always a pleasure." 
Your boyfriend nods and secures his arm around your waist and starts pulling you towards the stairs, "Well, you two have a nice night, and don't get into too much trouble."
"No promises," Satoru drags, settling back on the couch to sleep.
Suguru stares at the two of you near the opening and watches as you smile fondly at the man next to you. He clears his throat and calls out, "Y/n! Remember you're free to join us on our trip if you want." 
You look at him over your shoulder and smile before disappearing down the curved stairs.
~
They didn’t expect you to show up. They didn't even bother sending you a text the night before to remind you that you were still welcome. Both men were hopeful that by some miracle of the universe, you would show up at the last second and join them. No, they didn't expect you to come, however, the last thing they expected was for you to show up with tears in your eyes and your clothes soaking from the pour raining. But there, you are on the front steps of Suguru’s one-bedroom apartment, a duffel bag in your hand and eyes swollen two weeks after the party. You smile meekly at them, eyes squinting shut before you say anything, “Is it too late to ask if I can join you?”
Suguru mindlessly nods, eyes opened wide as he stares down at you, his eyes lingering on your chest before stepping aside and letting you in and out of the rain, helping you steady yourself as you take off your shoes. He clears his throat from behind you before speaking "I have a change of clothes if you want to change, and we can throw your clothes in the dryer." 
You nod staring blankly at the bathroom door near the hall, Satoru comes in from it, pulling a shirt over his head and obscuring his view, "Hey, who's at the door?" 
Leading you towards the restroom with a hand on the small of your back, Suguru answers, "It's y/n, she's coming with us." 
Satoru's head pops out when the restroom door closes behind you, "Oh, really?" it comes in muffled through the door and you can hear them heading down the hall as their voices fade.
Staring at yourself in the mirror, you feel your stomach start to twist at the sight of your soaked hair sticking to your forehead and shoulders. Mascara running down your cheeks from the tears and rain, eyes swollen and red. Your white dress is sticking to you, nipples hardened from the cold of the rain and of Suguru's home, allowing the color of them to be seen through the thin material. The back of your eyelids hurt every time you close your eyes.
You keep replaying the scene in your head. Keep hearing the sound of the door clicking shut behind you, and the sound of your boyfriend's name bouncing off the walls as you search his home for him. You keep hearing the sounds of muffled whimpers and the sound of groans traveling down the hall, which warped into themselves as you had slowly walked towards the bedroom. Your legs unsteady and sweat travels down your temples as you approach it. You can feel your heart speeding up as you open the door and find the man you had trusted with your heart, curved over the body of a blond, hands gripping whatever they could.
The sound of a knock on the bathroom door pulls you out of your daydream. Suguru's voice travels through the door, "Hey, you okay y/n?" 
You nod your head and remember he can't see you. Clearing your throat you try to sound normal, even with the knot that's lodged in your throat, "Yeah. I'm okay." 
There's a pause before he speaks to you again, "Okay, I have some clothes for you to change into, so if you want to open the door I can stick them through." Opening the door a few inches Suguru sticks in a stack of clothes, that you grab and set on the counter, "Um we'll probably leave in a few hours, so if you want to shower to warm up you have plenty of time. I don't think Satoru's even finished packing." 
"Um...thanks. I'll be out in a bit." You close and lock the door, before turning back to see yourself in the mirror. Swallowing the lump in your throat you pull the straps of your dress down, letting it fall to the ground with a wet plop. You can still see the fading lovebites from the other night, your stomach churns as your eyes travel along the path they create to the bottom of your stomach. You have the urge to rip off your skin the longer you stare at yourself. 
Tearing your eyes away from the mirror you turn the shower and run the hot water, peeling your underwear off and sorting through Suguru's hygiene products under the counter. For a man, you find a lot of feminine products, concluding he must keep them around for hook-ups who stay over. 
Grabbing a new loofa and a travel-sized body wash you climb into the hot water, grimacing when the water touches your skin. The bathroom starts to steam up, the mirror and glass shower door fogging up. You scrub your skin hard until it stings and feels like the scalding water is scorching it. You scrub until you are sure that every part of skin he's touched burns and that his fingerprints can't be found on your body. You scrub until you are sure that it'll take your skin less than seven minutes to replace the skin that takes seven years to replace. 
You somehow end up crying on the shower floor, a soft knock bringing you back to reality, where you realize the shower is now cold and that you're shaking beneath it. Shutting it off you reaching for one of Suguru's towels, the one you pick smelling heavily of his cologne, the scent that clings to the clothes you slip into after drying off. The white shirt he left you, falls below the curve of your ass, and the gray sweats slip off your hips even after pulling on the strings. Securing your hair in a towel you walk out the bathroom door into the open living space.
The dining area is directly in front of you, and the opening to the hallway is on your left, along with the living room. Large windows allow natural light to come in through the long white curtains that are usually closed but are now open due to the weather, letting you peer out into the inclement weather. Dark gray clouds floating across the sky, flashing every few minutes. You can hear the soft pitter-patter of the raindrops, the house quiet enough for you to even hear as the water pours down the gutter pipe, and the sound of the kitchen sink leaking.
You stand there for a few minutes, staring at the walls of Suguru's home. From where you stand, you take notice of the touches of feminity left across the spaces and how out of place they seem with each other. All are clearly either left behind or gifted. There are the unmatching throw pillows on the couch, one a bright red and the other a blue with a fringe, that clash against one another and the leather couch. There's a floral mug on the edge of the skin, bright colors of pink, purple, and blues sticking out against the white and stainless steel. There are a few plants scattered around the house, a few deaths, and others fighting to stay alive. 
"You're out," you feel someone's warm breath on your ear, causing you to jump. You look behind you to find Satoru standing behind you, who chuckles a bit as he looks down at your startled face, "Sorry didn't mean to scare you, but you didn't hear me come in and it just seemed so easy." The corners of his lips drop and he leans down a bit, pushing a strand of hair back under your towel. "Suguru told me you'd be joining us," he says while swinging one arm over your shoulder, and walking you to the living room, "and I will say I'm a little surprised you ditched my uncle, but I'm ecstatic we get to have you to ourselves now."
You swallow down the knot lodged in the back of your throat, tongue heavy in your mouth, and force a smile, "I hope you don't get bored of me."
Satoru plops down on the couch, pulling you down with him into his side, nuzzling his hair on the top of your head while he wraps an arm around you. "Us? Get bored of a pretty thing like you? Never," he replies, breathing the scent of Suguru's shampoo while holding you close.
You sink into his warmth, letting it envelop you, his sincere words alleviating some of the heaviness in your chest. The lids of your eyes fall close, your body exhausted from the day's events, to the sound of his steady breathing and the sound of raindrops hitting the large living room window. You breathe in Satoru's sweet scent, muttering, "I'm going to hold you to that," before falling asleep in his arms.
~
The car feels cramped and stuffy, even with the windows rolled down, your skin feeling itchy even through the layers of clothes you wear. Two hours into the drive and you want to strip naked in the backseat. 
“Can either of you tell me why we don’t have the AC on?” You grumble, tugging on the collar of the shirt Suguru had given you hours ago,
Suguru looks back at you through the rearview mirror, his left arm extended while holding on to the steering wheel, drawing your eye to the dark ink scales that wrap around his arm, the head resting on the center of the back of his hand while the tail curls around the top, muscles flexing as he holds on to it. His long dark hair is tied into a loose bun, strands of hair falling out, "The weather is nice enough to have the windows down,"
"It's fucking hot and humid," you bark, Gojo laughing in the passenger seat.
Suguru continues, ignoring your comment, "And the AC isn't working."
"Let me get this straight," you start from the back seat, "You decide to take a road trip during the summer, when it gets very hot, with a broken AC? Not only that, but I'm like ninety-nine percent sure you make enough money to have gotten it fixed before going on this trip."
Suguru's eyes flicker to you in the back seat, "Look I didn't have time to go the shop before."
You turn to look at Satoru, who's covering his laughs behind the palm of his hand, "Okay, then why aren't we taking one of your cars?"
His laughing stops, and he turns to look at you with a dead stare, "That's a touchy subject right now."
"His dad told him he had to learn to fend for himself in the real world after finding out he spent over four thousand dollars in one week," Suguru answers for him, covering his mouth with the back of his hand to hide his grin, "said he can get all his belongings back when he learns to be responsible."
You burst into laughter, "Oh no, did anyone tell him that that might be impossible?"
"Will the two of you shut up?" Satoru pouts, crossing his arms over his chest.
Giggling still, you undo your belt buckle and pat his shoulder, "It's okay Satoru. In the meantime if you need to borrow money, just let me know," you tease. Satoru shrugs your hand off, and turns back to look out the window, dark circled sunglasses protecting his blue eyes from the sun, while you lean back onto the seat, "Okay, so what am I supposed to do? I'm burning up back here."
"You can probably cool down if you take off those sweats," Satoru says nonchalantly while staring out the window, Suguru's dark eyes flickering to you once more, "No one would know anyways, it looks like a dress on you."
"I can't do that with the two of you in here."
"Then die of heatstroke, I guess."
Suguru watches the sweat drip from your temple down to your jaw, your lips starting to dry. He feels a little guilty for giving you the sweats and not a pair of his shorts, but nothing can be done about that now. Clearing his throat, he turns back to look at the road and says, "Look you can change back there if you want, we won't look. Promise." He nudges Satoru's side.
Satoru looks away from the window, muttering in agreement, "Yeah, promise, I won't look."
You sit frozen in the back seat, waiting to see if they keep their word, challenging them to look. When neither moves their head from the direction they're each looking in, you move to the edge of the seat behind Satoru's seat. You set both feet on the car floor, kicking your sandals off, and raise your hips to pull the sweats down to your mid-thigh before sitting back down on the seat completely. Pulling them the rest of the way off, you feel much cooler already, the humid summer air still warm on your exposed skin, but the hot air blowing through the car windows doesn't feel as suffocating anymore.
"Okay, I'm done," you announce, fixing the hem of the shirt, before looking up, startling a little.
Suguru is looking at you through the mirror again, and you feel something caught in the back of your throat while your stomach flips. He breaks eye contact first to look back onto the road, "Feel better?"
Swallowing the spit in your mouth you nod your head, "Yeah much better."
The rest of the car drive is pretty quiet, save for the radio playing a mixture of all of your music, and Satoru pointing out things along the way. Like a cloud that looks like a dog drinking tea, landmarks, or a beautiful view you happen to drive past. You continue to drive until the car needs gas.
Suguru pulls into a small gas station just outside of a small unknown town, with only two cars parked in front. "Okay, I need to fill up, and stretch so we'll stop here for a few minutes," he turns to hand you a wad of cash, "We also need some snacks and lunch, so if you want to go get us some sandwiches and chips, that would be great."
"Oh, okay," you respond, taking the money from his hand, "Anything specific you want?"
Suguru shakes his head, getting out of the car, while Satoru answers, "Could you get me some cookies, and if they have any of those little parfaits like cups? Also if they have any fruit cups get me one, and maybe some of those Starbucks coffees that are in the glass bottles, get at least one of each flavor they have."
"Yes, your majesty," you mock, getting out of the car and slamming the door shut before bowing, "your wish is my command." You skitter away when he fake throws something at you, laughing over your shoulder as you make your way into the gas station.
The belly at the door dings when you open the door, an employee behind the counter grumbling a greeting. The gas station has an ac running which helps cool you off the hot summer sun, the sweat on your body helping you cool down, as you walk around looking for what you need. You easily find the sandwiches Suguru asked for, a cup of fruit, and Satoru's drinks, the only thing you don't find are the parfait cups he asked for. Looking out one of the large windows you see Suguru leaning against the side of his car, still filling up on gas. You decide to keep looking around for a few more moments. 
Going down each aisle, you find little souvenirs and unknown snacks, along with car gear, such as bulbs for headlights, wires, and jumper cables. It's in there that you find a pair of scissors. 
They lay on top of any empty shelf, unpackaged, probably belonging to one of the employees, calling out your name. You hesitate on picking them up, fingers hovering over the rub handle. They feel heavy in your hand when you lift them, the sound of the two blades loud in your ears. Looking over the shelf, you make sure the employee isn't paying attention before setting all the things you had gathered onto the empty shelf, and that Suguru is still getting gas, before making your way to the restrooms in the back of the building.
The restroom smells heavily of bleach and cheap lavender air fresher, and the mirror has water stains on it. There are a few paper towels scattered around on the floor, but it is otherwise cleaned, which you didn't expect given that the gas station seems to not be frequented often. Looking down the hall one last time, you close the door and lock it. Your forehead rests on the cool surface of the white door, your heart racing, and the hand that's holding the scissors sweating.
You know you aren't thinking clearly. That all the decisions you make right now are byproducts of the heartache you're suffering from. Yet you find yourself making your way to the sink, staring at yourself in the mirror while twirling the ends of your hair.
After several moments, which feel like a lifetime, you grab a section of your hair and begin to cut. The sound of the blades clipping through rings loudly in your ears, but you don't stop, separating section after section of hair. Hair that the man you once loved and now loathed had caressed. 
The bunches of hair fall into the sink, and a few loose strands fall onto the floor, slowly piling on one another. You don't cry or get angry, you simply cut until your hair rests just above your shoulders. A cute little bob that frames your face.
With the last snip, you let the hair fall and run the tips of your fingers along the ends. The cuts are a bit jagged and uneven, but not noticeable unless you really looked. The hand that holds the scissors is trembling as you stare at yourself in the mirror.
It clicks then, the reality of what you've done. You drop the scissors onto the floor, scrambling to pick up the hair that decorates the floor, shoving it into the trashcan. 
"Oh my god, oh my god," you utter frantically, chest constricting.
There is a knock on the door as you shove the last bit in, the inside of your mouth feeling dry. Wild eyes find yours in the mirror as Suguru's voice travels through the closed door.
"Y/n, you in there? We're done getting gas, and Satoru's paying for the stuff you left out here, at least we're assuming you left out here," he sounds concerned, " You were taking a while to come out, so we came to look for you."
The palms of your hands are sweating, and you rub them on the shirt, trying to sound normal when you respond, "Yeah, I'm fine," swallow looking at the doorknob and opening it, "I'm coming out."
Suguru stares at you for several seconds, at a loss for words. Blinking, he gestures to your hair, stuttering over his words, "Y-your hair."
You smack your lips, pushing past him and heading out to the front of the store, "Yeah...so let's get going."
He chases after you, calling out, "Are we not going to talk about this?"
"No. It's my hair." 
"Okay, but you could have waited to do it professionally."
"I could've, but I wanted it done now." You near the car, and Satoru looks up from his phone, wearing the same look Suguru wore when he first saw you on his face, the same words stumbling out of his mouth, "You're hair? What happened?"
"I cut it."
"Why?"
"Cause I felt like it," you bark, swinging into the backseat, "Can we go now."
"Are we not going to talk about this?" Satoru asks exasperated.
Suguru get's in and answers with, "No, 'cause it's her hair."
"Damn right is my hair, so can we start going before it get's late." 
The two men share one last look, a silent exchange of worried looks before Suguru starts the car. No one talks or plays music. The drive is completely silent for the rest of the day's drive. 
You want to say you regret the spontaneous decision, but you don't, not when some of the weight on your chest has been lifted. Sure you might regret it later when you're thinking more clearly, but right now it brings you a sense of peace. 
The sun is just starting to fall below the horizon when Satoru pulls into the parking lot of a dingy motel, the sign slanted and flickering. You turn your nose up while looking around the parking lot. There's a gated pool area, with white lounging chairs spread along the edge, and a tipped sign with rules on it. Beyond that, secluded in one of the sides of the hotel, are two large trees next to each other with a hammock, and a patch of white cement underneath it. The place feels deserted, untaken care of with the thrown trash on the paved parking lot, and dried leaves on the sidewalks outside the rooms.
“Are we really staying here?” You ask, trying to keep your discontentment hidden, but your nose still wrinkles the more you look around. 
Suguru groans as he stretches from the passenger seat, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, "We're going to have to, next town is another two hours from here," he turns to look at you, "Do you want your own room or are you okay with sharing?"
You look around the parking lot, a piece of trash blowing across your field of vision, "Sharing is fine with me, I wouldn't want to be alone here."
Suguru nods and starts to get out of the car, "Alright then, I'll go get us a room, meanwhile, you two can start getting your bags out if you want to shower. We can go out to eat after, there's a nice burger joint around here."
Satoru follows, keys jingling as he spins them on his pointer finger, resting his arms on the roof of the car, "Sounds like a plan."
You stay in the car, watching Suguru head toward the front desk, your now short hair sticking to the back of your neck. "Do you think it's safe to stay here?" you voice, peering out the window at Satoru. 
He walks towards the back window, resting his arms on the edge as he looks at you, long body curved awkwardly, "It's fine, we've stayed here before it's not as bad as it looks. It's another small town so nothing ever happens." He pats the top of the car and moves to the back, opening the trunk.
You're still reluctant to get out, but you step out of the car, tugging on the hem of your shirt down. The air has cooled from earlier in the day, a cool breeze making the leaves of the trees sway, and less humid. Standing beside Satoru, you take your bag from his hands, fingers touching his, and wait as he digs for his and Suguru's. Neither of you speaks, the sing-song chirps of the birds as they fly towards their nests, and the rustling of the leaves. A few car engines can be heard off in the distance, and footsteps approaching you grabs your attention. 
You look up to see Suguru heading toward you, arms stretched over his head as he reties his long hair, biceps flexing, and the large arm holes of the tank top his wearing slipping, one of his nipples exposed to the cool afternoon air. "We got a room on the bottom floor," he announces, taking his bag from Satrou, "Room twenty-four."
The sound of the trunk being slammed shut echoes, followed by the sound of wings flapping as birds fly out from the trees near you. The sound startles you and you look up to watch them fly off, the sky starting to turn a shade of lilac, orange and pink bleeding into the soft color. 
"Come on, y/n," Satoru calls after you, waving you over to follow them.
The walk toward the room takes you around the hotel, somewhere near the pair of trees and hammock you had seen when you pulled up. The hotel lights flicker on, buzzing softly over your head while Suguru opens the door with a key. 
The lights are off when the door swings open, Suguru flicks the lights on when he steps in, and Satoru hangs behind until you walk past the threshold. The room is nicer than you expected, appearing to have recently been remodeled. 
There are two queen beds against one of the walls, light fixtures hanging on either side of each one, with a shared bedside drawer in the center, and a bible placed neatly underneath. There's a large flat-screen tv hanging in front of the beds, with an entertainment center underneath that has a coffee bar, mini-fridge, and the remote for the tv.
"This is nicer than I thought it would be," you answer, settling down on one of the beds, the sheets smelling like freshly washed linen. 
"See, I told you it wasn't as bad as it seemed," Satoru grins, tossing his bag at the edge of the bed closer to the door, Suguru doing the same before falling back onto his bed, the springs giving under his weight. 
"How about you shower first," Suguru offers, arms spread across the width.
You kick your sandals off, not about to pass on getting to the hot water first, you pick up your bag and head straight to the bathroom, "Yeah, sure." 
The door clicks behind you once more, and you find yourself standing back under bright fluorescent lights, that don't do you any favors. You don't recognize yourself staring back in the mirror right next to the door above a large sink, hair cropped short and greasy, lips chapped from being out in the hot air all day. All that paired with Suguru's oversized shirt, the only thing you have on, along with the dark circles under your eyes, you look like a deranged person. 
You don't bother trying to fix yourself and start to run the hot water while you undress, pulling the white shirt over your head, and letting it drop on the floor. Looking back up into the mirror you glance at your body, noting how most of the bruises from the previous night are now gone. It's crazy to think that in the last twenty-four hours, you went from a woman deeply in love, planning her days ahead with the man she loved, to a now single woman on a road trip with two men she had shared her entire high-school experience with. 
Once the room starts to steam up, the mirror getting fogged up, you climb into the shower, hissing when the hot water touches your bare skin at first before relaxing under the shower head. You're much gentler with your skin this time, lathering yourself carefully, the nerves remembering the burning sting from the morning. You appreciate the quiet of the bathroom as you wash, the sound of the television muffled by the door, and the sound of the water. 
When you come out of the shower, dressed in a baby blue sundress that stops mid-thigh, you seem like a different person from the one that showed up in the morning, and the one that cut her hair in a gas station restroom. You're humming as you put your dirty clothes in a separate part of your bag, your new mood has the two men staring at you, something you don't notice until you look up.
"What?" you ask, sitting down at the end of the bed near Satoru's legs.
Suguru shakes his head, putting his phone down on the bed, "Nothing. You just seem...like yourself again."
You raise a brow, "Is that a good or bad thing?"
"Good." Satoru breathes out, shifting to rest his head on your thigh, grabbing your hand to place on top of his white hair, humming in delight when you start massaging his scalp.
Suguru watches you two, eyes glued on the spot where your fingers circle in his best friend's hair, flickering up to find you smiling down at him. Something that he feels is misplaced blooming in his chest. Clearing his throat he gets up, grabs a handful of clothes from his bang, and announces, "I'm gonna shower now. I'll be out in a few," before disappearing into the door you came out.
You and Satoru remain like that for a few more moments, the sound of the shower running making you look up. A few more minutes pass before Satoru's head starts to feel heavy and you lift him off, standing up.
"Where are you going?" he asks, opening one eye to look at you.
"Need some fresh air."
He sits up, quickly suggesting, "Let me go with you."
You decline, grabbing Suguru's key from the drawer, "No, it's fine. I need some time alone and my hair needs to dry."
Satoru doesn't press any further, just stares at you and nods, "Okay, be careful, it's getting dark."
"I will," you smile, walking out the door.
In a span of a few minutes the sky has become a dark shade of blue, the sun still not fully below the horizon. The cool summer breeze lifts the end of your dress and engulfs you in the nostalgia of past family summer days when you'd go on trips like these and barbeque in the backyard. The chirping of the cicadas reminds you of lake days, and the firework shows they would have, the bright colors reflecting in the dark water. 
You find yourself truly smiling for the first time today, making your way to the hammock that is illuminated by a single light post. You don't check to see how sturdy it is before settling into it, swinging back and forth as you look up into the night sky. 
The stars are brighter out here, the light pollution from the city is not as bad, and you can make out more constellations. They slide in and out of view as you swing. You're so focused on the sky you don't hear the sound of a door shutting or footsteps approaching until someone is speaking right in front of you.
"You should have let Satoru come out here with you, I know it's a small town, but it's getting dark," Suguru gripes, stopping the hammock from swinging with both arms, caging you, "Don't want you doing something crazy like you did earlier."
His face is only a few inches away from yours, the scent of his cologne and body wash filling your nose, droplets of water falling from the ends of his hair onto your lap. If you tilt upwards a bit more your nose would brush against his. You can hear your heart beating in your ears and thumping against your ribs, the palms of your hands.
You smile up at him, "It's not that bad, the sun's just starting to go down. Anyways you're here now."
He drops his arms, grumbling, "God, I swear I wish I knew what was going on in that little head of yours. Scoot over." You move over, feeling the hammock slightly give under Suguru's weight as he sits beside you. You're quiet for a few minutes, Suguru gently swaying you with his heels on the ground. The sound of his voice startles you when he breaks it, "So are you going to tell me why you were crying this morning?"
You puff your cheeks, blowing the air out slowly, smiling sadly at the ground, remembering his comment from the party, "I think you already know, but if I must." You take another breath of hair, sighing as you turn to look at him, "I found him in bed with another woman, so I just left. Honestly, I didn't even know I was crying until I showed up at your doorstep."
It's quiet again, the cicadas chirping off in the distance, along with a dog barking at something, and the leaves crinkling over your head. You watch your feet hang above the ground, Suguru still swaying you back and forth.
"Well, he's an idiot if he thinks he can do better than you. Especially at his age," Suguru's words are somewhat comforting, they have you looking up at him, eyes widened, and giggle slipping from your lips. Suguru smiles at you, eyes shut closed, "What? I'm just saying it how it is. He thinks he's some big hot shot when he's just a forty-year-old man who can't date women his age 'cause he's a walking red flag." You laugh harder, your body shaking, laughter slowly dying, and your vision focusing on him through the tears.
You shouldn't. You know you shouldn't, that you're letting the heartache that weighs down on your chest cloud your judgment, but you lean in any way to press your lips to his, the hammock swaying under your movement. Suguru's lips are slightly chapped, and he tastes of the greasy hot dog Satoru had gotten each of you at the gas station earlier. You're sure he can taste the same thing on you when you slide your tongue into his mouth. Your hand finds its way into the tangled mess of his wet hair, threading your fingers through it as you pull him down to deepen the kiss. 
He forces himself to pull back, a string of spit connecting your lips, breathing unsteadily, asking, "You sure about this?" You look down at him, the sound of your heart beating loud in your ears. Swallowing down you nod, reconnecting your lips for a more passionate kiss that more tongue and teeth knocking against one another.
"Make me forget about him." 
The hammock sways more when you toss your legs over his waist, tilting it so far back that the two of you almost flip over onto the ground, but you never break the kiss. The hand in his hair massages his scalp while you grip his bare shoulder with the other, slowly letting it drop to feel his broad chest and ridges of his abdomen. Playing with the waistband of his loose-fitted sweats.
He moans into your mouth when you cup him through the material, your hand applying pressure down as your rub it. "You're a tease you know?" He utters, hand reaching up to hold onto your jaw as he kisses along your exposed neck and chest, fingers slipping under your dress.
You tremble above him as you feel his hand going up higher, your hand slipping beneath the waistband of his sweats, discovering that he forwent underwear. "What about you? You didn't even put on underwear," you throw back, feeling his hot length in the palm of your hand, fingers wrapping around at the base. 
"Fuck," he murmurs into your neck, nipping at the skin while burying his face further into your neck, his comeback dispersing from his thought process when you start stroking him. He hurriedly bunches the front of your dress, not wanting to let you do all the work, and groans when he sees the lacey blue thong, a small wet patch already forming. He circles your clit with his forefinger, his legs shifting underneath you to have more of a steady ground. He nuzzles his face back into your chest, nibbling and sucking on the tops of your breasts. 
Your head is resting on top of his, free hand tangled in his long damp hair, your breathing growing more uneven the more he plays with your clit and folds through your underwear. His cock grows harder in your hand, twitching when you brush on the bottom of the mushroom tip, his sweatpants getting in the way. 
Suguru's fingers slide the fabric of your thong to the side, directly touching you, fingers glistening under the moonlight. He circles your entrance with one finger, slowly slipping it in, groaning when he feels your walls pulsing around his thick digit. "You're so fucking wet, Jesus Christ, and hot," he huffs, "Guess he didn't fuck you right if just a few touches can get you soaked." 
Pull the waistband of his pants down freeing his cock, looking down to watch as it hits his lower stomach. Drool seeping out the corners of your mouth as you slur, "He didn't. I rarely ever came when we did it." 
"Oh really, guess I'll have to help you make up for all the times you didn't get to cum," he replies, slipping a second finger, making a come hither motion. His fingers feel deep inside your cunt, brushing against that one spot Satoru's uncle never seemed to quite reach. The spot that has your eyes rolling to the back and your mind going in and out of focus every time Suguru brushes against it, the heel of his palm hitting your clit, stimulating you further.
You're out of it, hand moving on its own accord, fucking yourself down on his fingers buried in your cunt. "Please, please, want to cum for you," you moan out loud, your brain no longer filtering any of your thoughts, "wanna come all over your fingers and your cock," your hand squeezes around his length.
Suguru chokes on a moan, his hips thrusting up into your hand, the hammock starting to sway again as he loses his ground while doing so, "Fuck, keep doing that, just like that."
Your hand moves up and down, matching the rhythm set by him, watching as the head of his cock is squeezed in your hand before it pops back up when you go down his shaft. You don't understand why, but the sight has you gushing around Suguru's fingers, thighs starting to tremble as your first orgasm approaches.
"Gonna cum," you whimper, burying your nose in his hair. The squelching sounds of your pussy grow louder and louder with every thrust of his fingers.
The front of your dress gets pulled down, exposing your tits to anyone who happens to walk by, Suguru's warm lips encasing one, biting into it before pulling back to look at the lewd expression on your face. "Then cum," he tells you, taking the nipple back into his lips to suck on it.
A couple of more movements of his fingers and you fall apart above him. His cock slips from your grasp, arms flying up to steady wrap around his neck while you shake, his fingers still moving in and out, helping you ride out your orgasm. You're mind goes blank, and the only thing you're able to process is the pleasure coursing through your body. 
When you come back down, the world feels fuzzy, your entire body buzzing. You feel circular motions being rubbed onto your lower back, the sensation relaxing and has you melting into Suguru's warm embrace.
"You good?" He asks, the side of his face resting on your chest, tongue licking the sweat off.
 Nodding you answer, tongue lax from the post-orgasm bliss, "Yeah, I'm good."
The hammock continues to sway, the heels of his fit touching the ground. The swaying cause you to feel something hard pressing to your inner thigh, making you very aware that you were the only one you came, and that Suguru is still suckling out your nipples, tongue playing with the hardened buds.
"You have pretty tits," he comments, apparently unbothered by his hard boner.
You ignore his compliment and snake your hand between your bodies, running your nails along his navel. "You didn't get to come," you say, looking down at him with a pout.
Suguru lets go of your nipple with a soft pop, smiling up at you, "Yeah, but that can easily be fixed," his fingers find your hole again, and he circles around it, "by you letting me fuck your tight little cunt properly."
You let out a moan, arms tightening around his neck. There's no need for you to respond, the way you press and push your tongue into his mouth is enough to let him know that you were planning on it anyway. Why start something if you weren't going to do it right anyway?
The two of you continue to kiss, tongues tangling with each other. Drool covers your faces as you sloppily kiss one another. Suguru's hands find the globes of your ass, large hands squeezing them and lifting the back of your dress, exposing your ass and wet pussy to the summer breeze.
Anyone could walk out into the parking lot and see what you two are up to, but you didn't care, you were intoxicated by the smell of Suguru, warm hands holding your legs open as he ran the head of his cock between your folds. You didn't care cause you also had this urge and need to erase the sensation of the places your ex had touched, to reach places he had never made you reach. If anyone saw you, well that was the last thing on your mind and the least of your worries right now.
"Need you, Sugu," you whimper, feeling the tip bump against your swollen clit. 
You feel one of his hands slide down your thigh, slipping into the pocket of his sweats, "One second, pretty girl, need to be safe first." He holds up a shiny blue foiled square packet between two fingers, tearing it open with his teeth.
"So you just care condoms around?" you ask, forehead pressed against his, one of your hands coming down to help him slide the rubber on his cock. 
"No," he pauses, the grip on your thigh getting tight," but you know who does? Satoru. And I just happen to be wearing his pants." The condom is fully on by the time he finishes his sentence, "There all done, now where were we."
"You were about to fuck me," you reply, reaching down to position him at your entrance. You both moan when the head slides in, your walls clenching around it. You slide down on his cock, inch by inch, feeling the stretch of his thick cock, your eyes glued on the spot where you two are starting to meet.
When you bottom out, Suguru tosses his head back, cursing loudly, "Fucking hell, your pussy feels like heaven," his nails dig into your skin, "You're squeezing me so fucking good right now." 
"Yeah?" you get out, brain starting to feel mushy all over again, filling absolutely full with his cock buried deep in you. You give yourself a few moments to adjust, before raising yourself up, whining loudly as you feel the drag of his cock, and dropping back down. 
The hammock sways because of your movements, slowly at first, matching the pace you set as you slowly bounce on Suguru's cock. But the fast your start to move the more the hammock rocks back and forth. Your boobs shake in Surugu's face, his footing on the ground lost as he chases after the sweet taste of your skin. 
"Feels so good, Sugu," you whimper, dragging out the last vowel of his name. The muscles of your thighs are starting to burn, and the spots where your knees dip down into the hammock hurt. But none of that matters to you when it feels like your insides are getting turned inside out and the scent of Suguru's sweat permeates the night's summer air.
Large hands grip your ass and soft lips nip on your neck, Suguru's warm breath tickling your skin when he speaks, "Yeah? Are you gonna cum all over my cock soon? Gonna let me feel you cream all over it while I fuck you outside?"
You nod, arms pulling closer into your chest, struggling to continue lifting yourself, warm flushing throughout your body, "Yeah. I want cum again, all over your cock." 
His hips move upwards to meet yours, the hammock swaying severely. The sounds of skin rubbing against skin sounds loud in the parking area and the sound of the rope straining around the tree synchronizes with the thrusts of your hips meeting his. The loud creaking would have had you burning with embarrassment if your mind wasn't going blank as you cum.
Your orgasm comes in long waves, rolling over your body. Warmth washes over your body as you shake in Suguru's hold, hips stilling against his while you cum, all the strength to lift yourself gone from your legs, choked moans falling from your lips. "Oh my god, so good. O-oh my god," you sob burying your head in his long hair.
Your hips roll into his, walls clenching and unclenching around his thick cock. Everything feels warm and out of focus, you barely notice that Suguru has stood up until you feel the bark of one of the trees on your back. The rough pieces dig into your lower back, surely leaving scratch-like marks, while Suguru ruts into it. 
His breathing is irregular, his large hands holding up by your thigh, chasing his own release. His nose is buried in the crook of your neck, hot breath hitting your burning skin, and his loud grunts right under your ear. You can feel his lips moving on the junction of your neck, but you don't hear any of the perverted words his saying, the world beyond his shoulder turning white.
You cum for the third time, body arching off the tree, legs shaking around Suguru's waist. Your release spurs his, and he cums in the condom, sweaty forehead pressed against your chest. You wonder if his vision also goes white and if he hears the same ringing in his ears as he empties his balls.
The hearing in your ears slowly returns, vision clearing, your arms still wrapped around his neck while he mindlessly kneads your ass. The first thing you hear is the rustling of the leaves and tall grass, and Suguru's labored breathing. The next is the far-off call of your names, you're brain recognizing Satoru's voice. You can't pinpoint where he is, but assuming the distance he's on the other side, probably heading toward the restaurant Suguru had mentioned to look for you. 
Wiggling in Suguru's hold, you drop your legs, choking on a moan when you feel him still hard inside of you. Suguru shakes, whimpering, "Stop that, you're not helping."
"How are you still hard?" you ask, eyes staring in the direction of the hotel room, half-expecting to see Satoru round the corner and find you. Your hand sneaks down, pushing on his navel slowly pulling his still-hard cock out.
Suguru hisses at the sensation of your fingers touching him, pressing soft kisses under your earlobe, "There's a thing called stamina, and I have plenty to go all night."
You chuckle, your body feeling like jelly in his hold, fingers carding through his long now dried hair, "Yeah, but we don't have all night, Satoru's looking for us."
"I heard," he murmurs, dropping your legs and pressing another kiss to your lips. He squeezes your ass, making you gasp, taking the chance of your lips being parted to slip into your mouth once more. 
You enjoy being kissed, and touched, by him more than you want to admit. But as your head beings to clear, as you began to realize while kissing him, going through with this is all feels wrong now. Both Suguru and Satoru had been your best friends throughout most of your high school years, and though you had daydreamed of kissing like this, doing things like this, with either one of them, you knew that crossing that line would change things between all three of you. 
You break the kiss, your hands resting on his shoulders, you're out of breath when you speak, "Aren't you scared he'll find us? What are you supposed to say if he does?"
Suguru comes up, a grin painted on his face, his lips swollen, "Then I guess you better hurry and help me with this." His hold on your waist loosens, one hand coming up to support himself on the tree behind you while he slips the condom off, tossing it into the shrubs beside you. Stroking himself with one hand while you drop down to your knees.
The patch of grass you kneel on isn't the softest, small rocks dig into your knees, and your soaked underwear sticks uncomfortably to the inside of your thigh when you rest your weight on the back of your calves. You put your hands on his half-covered thighs, tugging the rest of the sweatpants down to his knees while looking up at watching him touch himself. Keeping your hands on his thighs, nails digging into the hard muscles, you lick a long stripe from the crease of his balls to the slit on his tip, his hand coming off to rest on the back of your head.
You bat your lashes at him while you run your tongue along the shaft, teasing him endlessly, taking some enjoyment in the frustrated grunts he lets slip. You take one of his balls into your lips, suckling on it while running your hand up and down his shaft, feeling it burn an imprint into your palm. Memorizing the sounds he makes as he waits for you to take him into your mouth. Even with his hand resting on the back of your head he doesn't force you to stop teasing him and for that, you decide to end your torture and take the tip into your mouth. You've already long crossed the line that kept you at just friends.
Suguru easily hits the back of your throat, and the girth of his cock causes the corners of your lips to burn, the muscles of his thighs spasming as you take him in deeper. It takes you some time to acclimate to his size, having to pull off a couple of times before your nose is almost touching the trimmed hairs on his pelvis. But you manage, throat constricting around his cock, tongue licking the large vein that runs underneath. His finger grips a bunch of your hair, and the hand on the tree clenches while he exhales harshly out of his nose. You look up at him, eyes wide and dewy from the painful stretch of your mouth, the insides of your cheeks hollowing. His jaw clenches and the hold on your hair tightens.
He almost sounds broken when he speaks, dark eyes hazed over with pure unadulterated lust, "You look so pretty with my cock in your mouth," his fingers loosen just enough so he can rub his thumb on your temple, "It's taking everything in me not to fuck it right now. Wanna feel you gagging around it so badly right now. Wanna fuck myself into your throat until there's tears streaming down your pretty little cheeks." You hum around him, the sultry sound of his voice causing slick to seep out of your ruined cunt, "Oh? You'd like that, wouldn't you? Too bad we don't have enough time...but maybe next time."
You choke around him when his hips move on their own, pushing himself even further down your throat, your nails digging into his thighs. Pulling off you take a deep breath, strings of spit connecting your lips to his length. You pout up at him, voice hoarse, "That was mean."
"I know," He groans out, watching you take him back into your mouth, struggling much less than the first time. You pause when his coarse pubic hairs brush on the tip of your nose, swallowing around his length, humming when he tosses his head back moaning. Hollowing your cheeks you pull back until just the tip is inside of your mouth, swirling your tongue around the slit. Breathing in through your nose you glide your head back down, flatting your tongue on the underside. 
You start out with a slow steady pace, taking your time and letting your throat adjust to the girth and length, whiffing the scent of his body wash that lingers on his skin. Your rhythm increases so that the sounds of your gurgles and hums can be heard by anyone who happens to walk out of their room. Your knees are starting to hurt where the small pebbles in the grass dig harshly into your flesh, you're sure you're even bleeding some from the jagged edges of a few of the rocks cutting into it. But you can't bring yourself to care when the sight above you is heavenly. 
Suguru's hair is cascading over his face, his body curved downward, and his forehead rests on the hand that is supporting him against the tree. His mouth is ajar, letting moans and whines slip past them as he twitches in your warm mouth, his release looming over him.
"Can you hear the lovely noises your mouth is making while you take my thick cock down your tight throat?" He groans, the muscles of his thighs spasming under your hands. You hum around him, pushing your head down until your chin touches his swaying balls, batting your eyelash at him. He snickers at the lust-filled look you give him while pulling back, your teeth dragging along the length. "Gonna let me come in your mouth?"
"Mmhm," your hand moves down to play with his heavy balls, mouth descending once more. 
You take more than you meant, your throat spasming around his length, loud choked sounds reaching his ears. He would feel sorry, but the sound of you gagging around his cock and your hand squeezing his sac, is all it takes to push him over the edge.
He instinctively pushes you back down on his member when you attempt to come up for air, not expecting him to finish at that moment. His hips move reflexively into your mouth, the salty taste of his cum filling your mouth, fucking his cum down your throat, whimpering and heaving for air while his thighs twitch under the palms of your hand. 
When he finishes his hold loosens up and you pull back, breathing in throw your nose, chest hurting from the lack of air. You keep your mouth closed as you try to recuperate, freeing one hand to hold on to Suguru's softening cock, resting back. You swirl the contents in your mouth, humming while tapping Suguru's thigh to get his attention. Your position the head of his cock under the curve of your lips, carefully opening your mouth and sticking your tongue out, the tip brushing against the slit.
Above you, Suguru's eyes focus on the sight below him, his cock twitching in your hand. He wishes for a moment that he'd carried his phone out when he came to look for you, but how was he supposed to know you would end up in such a crude position? He would've taken the video of you swallowing his cum as a memento, one that he would've treasured for the rest of his life. 
"You're a little minx, you know that," he grunts out while you tuck him back into his pants. You stand and fix the top of your dress, reaching beneath to pull off your drenched underwear which you toss in a can near the opposite tree, shrugging. 
"I've been told," you respond, feeling the cool summer breeze blow under your dress, expression unreadable. 
Silence follows and the two of you stand awkwardly a few feet from each other, desire no longer clouding your minds. Your mouth opens and closes a few times like you can't form the correct words to say right now. You had wanted this earlier, had wanted to forget the touch of the man you had once loved, and you had for those couple of minutes. But now that you were thinking more clearly you knew that you had made a mistake by using one of your closest friends for your own benefit. Now not only did you still feel the fingertips of a ghost but the soft lingering touches of someone you still cared for and who would still very much play a part in your life. 
It's as if Suguru can see the turmoil going on inside your head, even when you show very little, but he lets out a sigh and rubs the back of his neck before breaking the silence, "We don't have to talk about it if you don't want. This could be a one-time thing. Don't feel guilty about it either, I know how you can be, I knew you were hurting and still let you go through with it." You blink at him, the breeze lifting the bottom of your dress, the far-off calls of your name reaching your ears. Suguru looks over his shoulder, turns on his heel, and starts walking toward the room, "Come on, Satoru's still looking for us."
He doesn't turn back to make sure you follow him. His hands buried deep in the pockets of his pants. And that simple act makes your heart ache even more than when you found your boyfriend in bed with another woman.
~
The tension is thick between you and Suguru the next day, Satoru oblivious to the events that transpired the night before sits in the back seat sleeping for most of the drive. Which leaves you alone in the front with your body positioned at an awkward angle leaning on the passenger door. Sugurur's music plays lowly, his thumb brushing along the curve of the steering wheel and his eyes on the road ahead.
You're cropped hair blows against the wind, chin resting on the palm of your head while you watch fields and trees flash past. A pair of Satoru's sunglasses rest on the bridge of your nose, protecting your eyes from the glaring sun and hiding the glances you sneak at Suguru.
His jaw is set while he looks ahead, glancing at his mirrors, and his hair is pulled into a ponytail, sunglasses resting on the top of his head. The hand that's holding onto the wheel flexes causing the snake head of his tattoo to give the illusion of it opening its mouth, the movement drawing your attention to travel down his face to this hand. A tingling feeling blossoms in the pit of your stomach, recalling the warmth of them wrapped around your body, holding you up, and the heaviness of his hand on the crown of your head when you had your mouth wrapped around him. Your eyes flicker from his tattoo to his crotch, which is still covered by the same sweats he wore the previous night.
"You're not going to talk to me, but you're going to eye me like a piece of meat?" he grouses, turning his head to look at you.
Your eyes flutter back to the passing scenery, your face feeling hot and the back of your throat drier than ever. Your voice is a higher pitch when you answer, the palms of your hands sweating on your lap, "I don't know what you're talking about, I wasn't looking at you."
"Yeah, sure, and you didn't have my cock down your throat last night," he throws back, laughing, attempting to sound teasing, but you can hear the hurt behind his chuckle.
Your entire head snaps to look back at Satoru, who is thankfully still peacefully sleeping in the back curled in an uncomfortable angle, "Sshh, do you want Satoru to find out?"
"I wouldn't mind if he did," Suguru shrugs, turning to look at you. You wish his sunglasses were obscuring his eyes so that you wouldn't have to see the saddened look they give you, "Look I told you not to worry about last night, let's just act like it never happened. 'Kay?"
You swallow, shifting back to your prior position, chest hurting, "How can we when you won't even look at me? I'm not the one making things weird, you are. Last night shouldn't have happened at all."
"Am the one making things wierd?" Suguru snickers, his voice rising, "You're the one who couldn't even look me in the eyes last night after you threw your underwear in the trash."
You're head whips around to look at Satoru, "Shh, you're going to wake him. Anyways you're the one who didn't talk to me for the rest of the night, and you completely ignored me this morning."
"Cause I didn't want to make you uncomfortable."
"Well, you're making me uncomfortable now by not talking to me," you argue back, watching his jaw clench and unclench before he turns back to the road.
"Fine, I'll start talking to you again," he infers, running his tongue on his bottom lip, clearing his throat before asking "Why do you care so much if Satoru finds out if we slept together." You know Suguru well enough to know that he isn't asking out of simple curiosity, but because it's clearly bothering him that you care so much. 
You sigh, glancing at the backseat once more, "Because we're friends, and I don't want his opinion of me to change after finding out I slept with one of my closest friends on the same day I broke up with his uncle."
"You know Satoru isn't like that. He'd probably tell us to turn back around so he could beat the living shit out of him." 
You swallow, a knot forming in the back of your throat, "I know, but still."
The car falls quiet after that, the awkward tension between you and him remains, but at the very least he asks you to change the music or give him directions and you can sit comfortably in your seat. You don't know if things will ever return to the way things were before, but what you can do is hope that they do.
Satoru wakes up towards the end of your drive, noting the change in the atmosphere between you and Suguru. He longer feels restless like he felt last night when he found the two of you walking on eggshells after running into him when he was returning to the room. He doesn't know what had the two of you acting like that, but as he watches you speak to each other for the first time since going to bed, he feels back at ease.
"Are you going to tell me what happened between the two of you that you were all weird last night and this morning?" Satoru asks, stretching his arms over his head, the scenery around starting to shift from the countryside to city life.
"It was something silly," Suguru answers, shooting you a half-smile, which you return.
He pouts in the back, hating that you two are keeping things from him, "Okay. I guess if you're talking again everything's fine." Satoru lets himself fall back in his seat, running a hand through his hair, "So what are we doing tonight? This is the last stop, and it's the least boring of them all. How about we go to that club from last time," he says, looking at Suguru.
The cars slowly start to pile up on one another the deeper you go into the city, Suguru's foot going a little heavy on the brake to keep from rear-ending the car in front of him that keeps braking. "Yeah, sure, but first let's get to the hotel."
The car falls quiet, the radio turned down letting the loud city noise surround you fully. You can hear the far-off distant honks, and a few only a few cars down, while you're stuck in traffic, you'd think years of living in the city you would have gotten used to it all, but the pounding in your head seems to grow the longer you stay seated surrounded by all of it.
You feel relieved when Suguru finally pulls into a private parking lot surrounded by buildings, he pays before driving into the lot and up to the third floor. He parks near the elevator, and takes his keys out, looking at you both. "Well, let's get out stuff and check in." 
You follow them out of the car, getting your stuff out of the trunk before heading into the hotel to check in. The hotel has high ceilings and maroon walls with golden accents. There are plants everywhere, and large columns lining the way up to the front desk. The receptionist greets you, an overused smile on her face, "Hi, how can I help you?"
"We'd like to get a room," Suguru starts, the receptionist's eyes flickering between the three of you, and continues when he notices the weird look she gives you, "Two queens please."
"Actually, I'd like my own room," you insert, Suguru glancing over his shoulder at you, an upset look flashing in his eyes that disappears just as quickly.
He turns back around, his voice hiding the hurt, "Okay, then we'll still get the room with two queens and one with a single."
The receptionist nods and types a few things on her computer, asking "Cash or card?" 
"Card," Suguru responds, reaching for his wallet. You make a note to transfer your part later.
"Okay," she drags out, turning the card machine toward him, clicking a few more things as he pays. "Here are your keys, the rooms are right across from each other. Room two thirty-four is a single room and room two thirty-five is a double." 
"Thank you, sweet thing," Satoru says taking them from her while Suguru puts his wallet back in his pocket.
You all head over to the elevator, the air around you and Suguru still awkward, Satoru standing between you and him as the doors close and you head up to your rooms. 
"Why'd you get a separate room?" Satoru asks.
You lean into his shoulder, lying, "Cause you two snore."
Satoru looks down at you with feigned hurt, while Suguru chuckles, "We do not." 
The elevator bell dings, opening to a long hallway with the same shade of maroon as the lobby and gold accents. Satoru leads the way toward your rooms, stopping in between the doors. "Okay, so we'll meet out here in thirty minutes and we can get food before going out to have some fun," Suguru declares, handing you your key, and smiling at you, "If you need anything we're right across the hall."
You nod, "I know." Both men stay still waiting for you to disappear behind the door. You give them a small wave after opening your door, " I'll see you in a bit."
~
You're vision and hearing come in and out of focus, the amount of alcohol coursing through your body making it hard to do anything. One moment you're swaying your hips to the blaring music, ass grinding back on someone, the next you hunched over a toilet, your knees on the dirty ground, the unsavory sounds of you retching fill up the small room. Somehow you manage to get to your feet, stumbling out of the bathroom into someone, and that's the last thing you remember before coming back to now.
It takes your eyes a moment to adjust to the dim light so that you can gather your surroundings. You're back in your hotel room, you can tell that much by the clothes thrown over the back of one of the chairs, and something is prodding between your legs. Something wet and long.
Peering down you spot see the top of white puffs of white hair, your legs squeeze around, head shifting to go deeper between your legs, drawing out a long moan. Your head doesn't feel fuzzy from just the liquor your drank, but also from the pleasure between your thighs, so it takes you a moment to recognize who is between your legs. 
Satoru's tongue lapping at your folds, circling your clit, it all feels so good. Your hand comes down to dig into his hair, there's really no way of telling you ended up here with him, the dress you'd worn to the club ripped on the ground, along with your panties. And the alcohol clouding your mind doesn't leave you much room for you to think about it.
Your legs squeeze and unsqueeze around your head, your legs stretching over his shoulder, your heel resting in the center of his back. The knot in your belly tightens, feeling as if it's about to snap the more his tongue moves along your wet folds.
"Gonna cum soon, 'Toru," you grumble, your head falling to the side. You feel his fingers draw circles on the thigh of your stretched-out leg while his free hand grips your other thigh. He hums into your folds, the vibrations sending another jolt of pleasure up your spine, your back arching off the bed. 
He comes up for air for a moment, a string of your juices and his spit leaving him connected to your folds, slurring over two words, "Then come." His head drops back between your legs, tongue moving more feverishly, urging you to release over his tongue.
And you do. Your back arches off the bed, your hand pushing him in further between your legs, a strangled moan slipping out of your mouth. Satoru's tongue continues to lap at your folds, overstimulating you while your legs jerk and squeeze around his head. Your entire body goes numb while you climax, tongue lolling along the back of your teeth. 
You let out a whimper while coming down from your high, Satoru's lips wrapped around your clit, sucking tenderly on it. Your mind clears, and you glance back down at him, pushing gently pushing his head, you notice his hips moving against the end of the bed. You giggle, sliding your legs off his shoulders and pulling him up, thoughts still muddled, "Do you always get so needy you end up fucking the bed?"
Satoru presses open-mouthed kisses on your shoulders, making his way up to your lips, breath reeking of alcohol, "Only when the pussy I'm eating is divine."
You smile against his lips before pulling him down. Your tongue and his tangling with each other, your fingers running through his soft white hair. You can taste yourself on his lips, can smell yourself as you deepen the kiss. The scent mixes with the sweet scent that is purely Satoru Gojo. His smell and weight of him are everywhere.
His hands are sliding up your thighs, one hand stopping at your hips while the other continues up towards your bare breast. You feel him pinch one of your nipples, twisting it between his thumb and pointer. Your hand goes from his shoulder down his own body until you feel the curve of his ass, squeezing the muscles in your hand. 
Satoru moans into your mouth, lips leaving yours leaving you chasing after them, "You're naughty," he chuckles, head dropping down into your neck, sucking and biting at the skin. You feel him grinding against your pussy, cock sliding between your folds, head nudging against your swollen clit, your legs coming up to rest on the sides of his waist. 
You let yourself moan freely, your hips rolling back up to sync up with his thrusts. Everything is becoming clearer and fuzzier at the same time, you're sobering up, but the satisfaction you feel shooting up your spine when the head of Satoru's cock bumps against your bud. "Feels so good, 'Toru," you slur, your head dropping on top of his.
"Yeah? Me too," he grunts, glancing down to watch as he slides between your wet folds, running his tongue as he tasted the taste of your juices that lingered on his lips. Satoru suddenly moves away from you, resting up his knees, one arm wrapping around your waist and lifting you, making you yelp, "You've ever sixty-nined before?"
"No," you gasp, your body shifting in his arms as he makes way for the center of the bed.
"Wanna try?" He grins, dropping back on the bed, and already turning you around, too eager to have his lips on your cunt and your mouth wrapped around his cock.
"I um..." you look over your shoulder, watching Satoru situate your legs on either side of his face, the eager look at his face makes your face burn, "I guess," you utter turning back to come face to face with his hard leaky cock. He's long, the head flushed pink, and not very girthy, balls hanging heavy.
You jerk forward when you feel the tip of his nose nudging against your clenching hole. "You smell so good," he mutters, sticking out his tongue to circle your clit, repeating the same motions he had moments earlier.
With a shaky hand, you reach up to hold his length in your hand, whimpering as you feel him swirl his tongue into your clenching walls, sliding down and back up. You lean forward, wrapping your lips around the tip. The hand you used to stroke him with stays on the base of his shaft, your mouth descending along the length until your lips are brushing against your hand. 
Satoru whines against your pussy, muttering dirty words that you can't quite make out over your heavy breathing and choked gags. Your close your eyes when you feel his tongue go down to circle your clit, moaning around his hard cock as he spreads your labia for easier access to your pussy. The vibrations have him bucking up into your mouth, hitting the back while your hollow your cheeks and slowly start bobbing up and down. 
You do your best to fit as much of him as you can down your throat, using your hand on the parts that don't fit in your mouth, gliding it up when you go up. Keeping your lips around the tip a moment longer, tongue licking the pre-cum that oozes out. It tastes oddly sweet, if you didn't know any better you'd assume it was due to all the sweets he consumes, but not that you're going to complain about how it tastes. 
Soon the sound of gagging and slurping fills the walls of the hotel room and the smell of sex penetrates your sense of smell. the back of your thighs starts spasming, and your throat burns from taking Satoru's cock as far down as you can manage. Your whine around his cock, the corners of your eyes stinging from the tears, his hands spread your ass and he watches your untouched hole clench around nothing while he licks your pussy.
He lets go of your cunt with a pop, licking the mess around his lips, fingers circling the rim. You squirm above him, whimpering, and he grins as he watches, "Ever been here?" 
You shake your head, suckling on the head, "Really? It looks like it wants something, it's just begging to have something to squeeze," he teases, pushing a single finger in, groaning when it clenches around it, his lips returning to lick at your hole.
You can feel his tongue and finger sliding in and out of either hole. The sensation pushes closer and closer to the edge and concentrating on sucking on his cock get's harder the more he touches you. You pull him out of your mouth using your hand to stroke him while your head drops onto his thigh.
"Gonna cum soon," you warn, moving your hips back to meet his finger and tongue.
You feel him smile against your wet folds, a second finger joining the one in your ass, "Yeah? Do you like your ass getting fingered that much?" You moan in response, all the words jumbled in your head, "Oh, so you do. Okay then cum all over my tongue while I finger fuck your ass."
His fingers start moving much more quickly, both curving up to drag along the walls of your ass while he eats your cunt out with vigor. You don't last long with the quick rhythm he sets, your release washing over you with no warning. The back of your thighs shake and tremble in Satoru's large hand, sweat dribbling down your temple, and loud moans making the back of your throat burn even more. Your nails dig and scratch on Satoru's thighs, his dick twitching in your other hand due to the pain, before he releases all over it, some of his semen landing on your face. 
The two of you are out of breath by the time you finish coming down from your high, chests rising and falling rapidly, your brain feeling like mush while you watch Satoru's thighs spasm, his cock still semi-hard in your hand. You can hear him mumbling something behind though can't make out what it is, and can feel his fingers pulling out from your ass, slowly sliding down your folds. 
You whimper when you feel your body getting shifted, drool sticking to the side of your cheek. Satoru's flushed face comes into view, and his cock is sliding between your folds. His lips are moving, but you can't make out what he's saying, but you can guess what it is by the way his cock presses against you. So you just nod and watch him grin before he reaches for his pants hanging off the edge of the bed, reaching into a pocket for a small foiled square packet. 
You close your eyes, the hearing returning to your ears, and you can hear him ripping the packet. You feel his hands slide behind, a few seconds passing before you feel him slide the head between your folds once more.
"Ready?" He asks, head already pushing in.
When you speak your voice is dry and hoarse, the back burning from pushing him too far back, "Yeah."
Satoru rubs the high of your cheek, raising his hips to push into your heat, groaning as he does, his eyelids fluttering. "Not going to last long," he whimpers, glancing between your bodies to where he's entering you inch by inch. "You're pussy's so warm and tight," he snickers, his feet getting planted on the bed, "Can you sit up for me?"
You look at him, meekly nodding, using his chest to steady yourself on while you rise, "I think so." You whimper feeling him reach deep inside you. You swear that if you drop down a bit more he'd be fucking his cock directly into your cervix.
"Good girl. No, fuck yourself a bit on my cock," he moans, eyes scanning down every curve of your body. 
Taking a deep breath you raise your hips, sliding halfway up his length before dropping back down, a loud moan falling out from your lips. Satoru's eyes glued on your bouncing breasts. You keep doing it over and over again, your movements have no real rhythm, and your body is tired from the two previous orgasms. And to be honest you don't think you would have been able to handle anything more.
But Satoru has other plans, with his feet already planted on the bed, he moves down at the same time you move up, harshly thrusting up when drop. His balls hit the curve of your ass, and there's a loud clap that bounces off the walls syncing with the loud moan you let out. 
Your body continues to be fucked up into, your brain turning more and more into mush as Satoru keeps hitting that one spot deep inside of you. Your nails dig into his chest, leaving bright red makes. Satoru hisses and moans beneath you, his fingers gripping tightly to the fat at your hips.
Like he said he doesn't last much longer, quickly releasing into the condom while his hand flies down to play with your clit again, wanting to feel your walls release around his cock. And he gets exactly that when you tremble above him before clasping onto him, your breath labored. 
The two of you stay like that for a long time, Satoru's hands drawing circles on the small of your back, the soothing feeling causing your eyes to flutter close. You fall asleep on top of him, engulfed by his warmth. 
You wake up hours later to the sun slipping in through the curtains of your room. A painful pounding in your head and the back of your throat feeling dry. You sit up rubbing your head, groaning while you blindly reach around trying to find the switch to one of the lamps. 
You're body freezes when you feel the warmth of a body next to you. Quickly turning on the lights you find Satoru laying beside you. One arm rests on his bare chest while the other is extended. The sheets of the bed resting low on his hips, giving you a peek of some white hair.
Without thinking, you push him off the bed, letting out a yelp, "What are you doing in here?"
Satoru groans in pain, rubbing the back of his head while he rests his elbows on the bed. His eyes still filled with sleep and his head pounding with a hangover and from pain. "Don't know. Did you really have to push me off the bed?" he mumbles.
Wrapping the bed sheets around your body, you go to the side he's on, lightly kicking him with your feet, "Yes. Now get up and leave."
Satoru groans as your hands continue to push on him, the heels of your hand digging harshly into his back, "I'm getting up, give me a second." He stands to his full height, scanning the room for his clothes while holding the bed sheets he was wrapped in around his hips, "Shouldn't I stay so we can figure out what happened?"
You continue to push him towards the door while he picks up his clothes along the way, feeling knots in your throat, "Well based on our current state and the used condom at the end of the bed, I can make a pretty good guess. What I need you to do is to leave my room before Suguru comes in here asking where you at, and finds us fully naked."
Satoru slumps back onto you, heels digging into the floor, and pouts at the ceiling, "Why are you so worried about him finding out? Are you embarrassed you slept with me?"
"Yes very much so," you reply, panicking while reaching for the doorknob. You manage to open the door, and press both your palms to the small of his back, putting all your strength into pushing him out the door, "Now that you know that leave." Satoru stumbles out the door, crashing into a person who stands directly in front of him, before stumbling back into you. Looking around Satoru's tall frame you see Suguru outside your door, clenched hand in the air.
The three of you stare at each other, Suguru's hand still hovering over Satoru's blank expression. His hand drops to his side while his eyes flutter between you and Satoru, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down.
The seconds that pass feel like hours before he breaks the silence, "We're leaving in an hour." It's the last thing he says before leaving you and Satoru standing awkwardly next to each other.
~
The next four hours in the car drag on, and you're in the backseat again, Suguru driving the car with his jaw clenched and eyes covered by his sunglasses while Satoru sits beside him staring out the car. The air is heavy and tense, none of you talking since before checking out of the hotel. The uncomfortableness travels up your spine, the back of your neck sweating while you sit perfectly still in the center of the back seat. Waiting for Suguru to break the silence, his irritation radiating off of him. 
He isn't the one that breaks the silence though, it's Satoru with a heavy frustrated groan, making you and Suguru jump. He drags his hands over the back of his undercut, sighing as he looks at Suguru, "I can't take this anymore, so say something."
"Like what?" Suguru snares, glaring at the road ahead.
Satoru waves his arms around, "I don't know, like why you're so angry right now."
"Like you don't know why I'm royally pissed at you right now." 
"I do, but it'd be better if you just said it instead of shutting us out," Satoru replies, glancing at you, "What do you want me to say? Sorry for breaking our agreement of not sleeping with y/n," he's tone starts to get sarcastic, "Sorry that I got to her before you did."
You're in the back seat trying to speak, getting ignored as Suguru laughs, "You had an agreement not to sleep with me?"
He speaks over you, glancing at you through the rearview mirror, "Should I tell him or should you?"
"Tell me what?" Satoru asks, his eyes flickering between him and you, eyebrows scrunched in confusion.
You attempt to reason, "Suguru, please stop. You're angry right now, we can talk about this later when we're all calm. It's not that big a deal." 
Suguru laughs, the sound coming from the back of his throat, "Not a big deal? If it wasn't a big deal you wouldn't have tried to keep us from finding out you slept with each of us." 
"Wait, she slept with you? When?" Satoru looks at you for confirmation. 
You swallow and open your mouth to respond, but Suguru beats you to eat. His words are meant to sting, coming out harshly, the corners of his lips curving as he boasts about the first night of the trip, "Oh yeah, she did. The same night she broke up with your uncle at that. You know when you couldn't find us after showering, well we were outside and did it on the hammock before I fucked against a tree and shoved my dick down her throat. Our little friend is a huge fucking slut because apparently cause sleeping with one of her friends wasn't enou-"
You barely see it happening, one moment Suguru is grinning at the street, voice high and proud, the next the car is swerving into the opposite lane, Satoru's fist just having made contact with Suguru's jaw. The car veers back into the correct lane, pulling into the side where he breaks, your body jerking forward. 
"You fucking piece of shit, you could've killed us!" Suguru roars.
"I don't give a damn, take back what you said, right now!"
"What that y/ns a sl-"
"Don't you dare say it again. Take it back or you're going to regret it!"
"What are you going to make me regret it? I want to see you try."
You watch the two of them get out of the car, doors slamming shut as they meet in the front of the car, pushing on each other's chests. You scramble to undo your seat belt, chasing after them. Your heart pounds against your ribs as you watch them start to tackle each other.
"Guys, stop it," Your voice starts low and shaky, the two of them almost bumping into you while they wrestle onto the ground. You follow them, your voice rising as you continue to repeat the same words, begging them to stop. All of your frustration and anger towards the newfound information of their agreement, from being cheated on, and the fact that everyone was keeping something from you, spilling over in one last shout, "I said fucking stop!"
The two of them stop, turning their heads to look at you. Suguru is straddling Satoru, the latter's shirt caught between his fists. Both covered in dirt from head to toe.
"You're both acting like children, scratch that children act better than this! So what if I slept with both of you? I'm free to do whatever I damn please!" you yell, tossing your hands around erratically. You feel very agitated, the blood in your veins burning with anger, "I'm not some object the two of you can fight over. I'm a living and breathing human. If I wanted to be treated like a doll who doesn't feel, or isn't aware of what is happening, I would have stayed back home with the piece of shit I used to call my boyfriend," by this time you have tears running down your cheeks. "I thought the two of you might have been different, but you're just like every other fucking piece of shit man on this damn planet. Fighting and having pissing contests when all you want to do is fuck each other. Oh, cause don't think no one notices the way the two of you look at each other or knows how the two of you have masturbated in the same room multiple times. We all just act like we don't know," you laugh extending your arms to the side, before dropping them down in defeat.
You bite the side of your cheek, fighting to keep the tears from spilling. The two men stare at you, guilt swirling in their chests, in Suguru's more than Satoru's. This entire trip had been one huge mistake. 
"Please open the trunk," you 
"Y/n -" Satoru starts.
"No stop, and open the trunk," you stand your ground, "I'll find a way to get back home."
They both stand, Suguru dusting himself off, while Satoru just looks at you with sad eyes. "Y/n you don't have to go that far, just finish the trip with us."
You seem hesitant, your eyes flickering between them and the closed trunk. With a heavy sigh, you look at both men, "Fine. But you have to tell me about this agreement and we're all going to start acting like adults." The two men nod, shoulders still tense, "Okay then let's finish getting to this beach and getting a hotel cause I'm already tired for the day." 
~
The sun’s peeking over the horizon of the beach, hues of pink and blues decorating the sky when you make your way back from the beach. The air feels much cooler ear near the sea, the breeze coming from the sea cooling the area down for the night.
Glancing over your shoulder you were at the luxurious beachfront hut Suguru had reserved, not that you would call it that when it had electricity. The light pours out from the windows onto the sand along with the sounds of the two men arguing inside.
It had been like this since you arrived, Satoru and Suguru fighting when they thought you weren't anywhere nearby to hear them bickering. Satoru keeps trying to get Suguru to sincerely apologize to you, and Suguru keeps telling him that he doesn't have to do anything he doesn't want to. The two men both fall silent the moment you come into view, a remorseful look washing over Suguru's face while Satoru looks at you with sympathy. It's the same looks they wear right now when you walk back into the small living area. 
"Soo, do I need to sleep with the two of you at the same time to fix this mess?" You half-tease, leaning against the wooden entrance, breathing in the salty scent of the sea while you size both men up, "I'm pretty sure I could take you both."
Suguru jaw tenses and he exhales through his nose, "Y/n, don't even start. Be serious right now."
You push yourself up, stalking toward Satoru, "What? I am being serious. It's not like I haven't already seen what your both packing and if it's the only way to make the two of you stop arguing well...I don't mind." You tilt back to look at Satoru, putting your hand near his lower abdomen and gently pushing back onto the couch behind him before straddling his lap, the skirt of your dress extending around you.
Satoru looks up at you, swallowing down the fact that he's getting turned on by your sudden closeness, knowing that this is not truly the road you want to go down. Though you're seated on him your attention is on the man behind him, your eyes showing nothing but determination. He calls your name once to get your attention, large hands resting on your hips, "Y/n, please don't do anything you'll regret. This isn't what you really want."
You look down at him, swallowing down hard, and reach for one of his hands, pulling off your hips. "You sure?" You question, dragging his hand beneath your skirt, directing his long fingers to your bare cunt so he can feel your pussy getting wet.
"Fuck," he breathes under his breath, leaving his fingers playing with your folds when you let go and look back at Suguru who stays frozen in his spot. You keep eye contact while slowly grinding down on Satoru's fingers, moaning when he slides two fingers in and buries his head into your chest, nipping at the tops of your breasts.
You finally challenge Suguru when Satoru tugs the straps of your dress down, freeing your breasts, "You gonna stand there and watch?" Your eyes fly down to the tent in his swimming trunks, "Doesn't seem like that would be much fun."
Suguru visibly struggles, turmoil swimming in his dark eyes. You that even though he's angry with you right now for sleeping with both him and Satoru back to back, he also has a need for you both. You're not surprised when moves towards you, uttering under his breath, "Fucking hell, can't believe I'm actually doing this."
Grinning up at him, you rub the bulge he's sporting, holding him in your hand through his shorts, "You're fucking hard." He doesn't respond just looks down at you with lust dazed eyes, watching as you ride Satoru's fingers. 
You tug the waistband of his pants down, listening to them drop down to the floor, his cock springing free. Not a moment is wasted, the moment it slaps against his stomach, your lips are wrapping around the head, easing it into your mouth. Suguru curses above you, his hand coming up to rest on the back of your head, pushing you down. The words he said the other night come to mind as you feel tears start to prick the corners of your eyes from taking too much too quickly.
"I think this time, I'll make you gag and cry all over my cock," he groans, using both hands to force himself to the very back of your throat, blocking the airflow and forcing you to breathe in through your nose. 
It hurts and stings, the sounds of your gagging have Satoru's fingers stopping to look at you to make sure you're okay. If he goes off the lewd you face your making and the new slick that starts to drench his fingers, he'd say that choking on a cock was exactly what you wanted. And so he turns back to what he was doing, kissing along your neck and stretching your cunt out for him and Suguru to use, fingers easily sliding in and out with the slick your produce.
Suguru pulls you off his cock meanwhile, enjoying the view of the tears that decorate the corners of your eyes and the way your lips have gotten swollen. He takes pleasure in the way you're gasping for air, your expression already morphing into that of a fucked out face. 
He takes his cock in his hand and rubs it along the curve of your lips, waiting for you to recover your breathing. "Did you like choking on my cock?" He asks, slapping the head on your mouth and cheek. 
Your answer gets muffled when he moves forward, slapping the entire length of your face, the corners of your lips curving upwards. "Yes, I did. Oh god, right there, 'Toru."
Suguru scoffs when he hears his friends slip from your lips while his cock is on them, he peers down around to find Satoru has two fingers in your cunt, and his thumb in your ass. His eyes shift back to you, the moans you're letting out engraving themselves in his brain before he inserts his cock back into your throat, thrusting into it over and over.
Your cheeks hollow out, head starts to bob up and down in time with his thrusts, throat constricting around him, and moans vibrating along his shaft and up his spine. The sounds of your pussy and slurps from your mouth fill the small living space of the hut, anyway walking by wouldn't have to think much about what was happening just beyond the thin curtain that obscured their view.
Suguru feels himself twitch in your mouth, the coil in his belly tightening, about to snap. He pulls you off quickly, cursing under his breath while trying to keep his orgasm from washing over him, taking in the fucked expression you wear. It takes him a moment to recover his breathing, eyes squeezing shut, the moans you let out while Satoru fingers you louder. But when he's done, he's pulling off Satoru's lap, standing you up and pushing on your shoulders, "On your knees." Doing as your told, you drop on your knees in front of him, your eyes fluttering towards Satoru, watching him pull his shorts down and throw them somewhere. Long cock bobbing while he makes his way towards you, standing shoulder to shoulder with Suguru. Both their cocks are right in front of your face, Suguru's hand reaching to guide your hand to both, his voice is commanding when he speaks, "You said you could please us both, so do it using just this pretty small hand."
You swallow taking their in your hand, struggling to hold both of them as you slide them up and down. Your thumb brushes against Suguru's head, causing him to hiss and buck his hips. Salvia forms in your mouth as your watch pre-cum leak out of its slits, serving as a lubricant for your hand. Holding them like this you can see the clear difference in their sizes. 
"You both have such pretty cocks," you praise, looking up, the sight above you sending an extra jolt of pleasure between your legs, arousal seeping from your cunt.
Both men are kissing, tongues tangling with one another while their teeth clash. Their hands on the other face while their lips move against one another, their hips rolling into your hand. You can hear the soft whimper Satoru lets out, his face and ears flushed red, excessive pre-cum coating your hand. You keep your eyes on them while leaning forward to lick it all up, their whines and groans sounding like music to your ears.
If anyone had told you that you would be watching your closest friends make out, that you would end up in a threesome with them, you would've sent that person to hell. 
You feel both of them twitching in your hand, and you're almost scared to ask in case the scene above you disappears, "Are you both gonna cum?"
Suguru shakes his head, speaking between kisses, "Not yet...just need to fucking piss...'Toru too." His hand comes down to join yours in touching his friend's cock, his fingers concentrating on the head.
"Should we stop then?" 
"No...just keep going," he replies glancing down at you from the corner of his eye.
You blink up at him, a newfound feeling forming in the pit of your belly when it clicks on exactly what he's planning to do. You continue to watch them kiss, your hand sliding up and down, while you occasionally take one of them into your lips, swirling your tongue on the tip.
Satoru is the first to start peeing, lucky for you your mouth is wrapped around Suguru's cock when he starts. The warm liquid hits your shoulder, surprising you. You quickly pull off Suguru, head turning to look at Satoru, his piss hitting the bottom of your chin, he apologizes to you, eyes squeezed shut while he ruts into your and Suguru's hands.
Suguru follows right after, his hand coming down to tear yours off his cock, so that he can get a better aim at your face. It's embarrassing the way heat pools between your legs while you get pissed on. Marked as theirs by the scent. They both come a moment after, their cum coating and mixing in with the liquid that drips down your body. The muscles of their thighs twitch.
"Fuck that felt good," Suguru moans, pushing a dazed Satoru towards the curtain that hides a single bed, reaching down to pull you up, leading you towards the same bed, "Ready for more?" 
Satoru settles back on the bed and stretches out his arms to pull you into him, not minding the wetness. He presses a kiss to your temple and below your ear, whispering, "You did so good for us. You're such a good girl."
You smile against him, feeling the bed shift under Suguru's weight. His hands coming up your ass, spreading your cheeks apart, lathering your slick over your folds. 
"Wanna share?" He asks Satoru, slipping one finger into your walls, watching the way your pussy reacts. Both men speak as if you aren't there.
"Aren't we already sharing?"
"Yeah, but I meant to you want to share the same hole?"
"Like that one time?"
"Yeah."
Suguru leans down, his chin resting on your shoulder, "What do you think, y/n? Think you can take us both in your pretty little pussy. Wanna feel us both stretching out your naughty hole?"
You stare at him, blinking, you never thought that something like that was possible. "Will they both fit?"
His fingers slide out, spreading your slick to your clit, "Yeah, we've done it before...most girls seem to like it."
"Yeah?" you ask, nuzzling closer to Satoru, your walls clenching around nothing.
"Yeah, some of them squirt, so who knows maybe you will too."
Swallowing down you nod your head, you still have reservations, but your curiosity of what it feels to have two cocks stretching you outweighs them, "Okay then, I think I'll try."
"Good girl."
"Fuck."
They position the heads of their cocks at your entrance, both slowly start to push into you, you whimper at the stretch, you don’t think it's a feeling you could ever really get used to. The stretch of just their tips has you wondering how you are going to fit both of them in one hole when you already felt so full.
You both let out groans as they push inch by inch, waiting for them to bottom out.
You can feel the tip of Satoru's cock brush against your cervix, whimpering into his neck when you feel him twitch against it, "Too deep."
Suguru curves his body over yours, one hand sliding down between your bodies to play with your clit and Satoru's balls, his lips brushing against the other man's lips, "You can take it."
It's the last thing he says to you before he starts rolling his hips into you, Satoru whimpering against his lips, overwhelmed by the drag of his friend's dick against his and your warm pussy walls. 
Suguru's thrusts are rough, his pelvis slapping against the curve of your ass, his hands gripping your hips, keeping you in place. It's all too much for you and Satoru, your eyes and his rolling into the back of your head while your loud moans bounce off the walls of the room. Drool slips out the corners of your lips, landing on Satoru's tongue sticks out. You can feel them both twitching inside of you.
They release inside you at the same time, their semen mixing, painting your insides white. The same white that flashes behind your eyelids when you cum around them. An odd feeling washes over you, a feeling that is similar to when you pee,
"Fuck we really did make her squirt," you hear one of them say before everything turns black.
You're not out for long, but when you come back to, Satoru is on top of you, hard cock still inside of you. His hips jerking into you, strangled whimpers falling from his swollen lips. His blue eyes find yours, and he whines, rolling into you, "You're back, thought we lost you for a second." Another moan falling from his lips before you can answer.
You scrunch your eyebrows and peer over his shoulder. Suguru's head coming into view. You see his large hands holding Satoru's ass apart, his tongue lapping at his friend's hole. Lips wrapping around the muscle, loud slurping sounds reach your ears. Your cheeks burn at the sight, pussy clenching around Satoru's cock.
"Don't don't do that or am going to cum," he groans, his hand coming up to knead your breast.
The bed shifts again, Suguru's face popping up over Satoru's shoulder, "Morning sleepy head, I thought you'd miss the rest of the fun.
"What do you mean?" You croak.
"Just watch Satoru's face," Suguru tells you before disappearing from your view.
You turn to look at Satoru with a confused look, just in time to watch his jaw fall slack and a pained moan slip from his lips, his hips getting pushed into you, causing the same reaction to wash over you. You struggle to tear your gaze from Satoru's face and look back over his shoulder, watching Suguru push the head of his length into Satoru's ass. 
You watch Satoru's face twist in pain and pleasure as Suguru pushes more of his length into Satoru. Moaning when he twitches in your cunt, his hips subtly rolling into you and back into Suguru. His eyelids flutter closed when he bottoms out, "Shit."
Suguru sets the pace, slowly at first, his hips barely separating from Satoru's ass, whose cock keeps twitching against your softness every time he rolls his hips into your hips. The rhythm steadily increases until there are soft palps of Suguru's ass meeting the curve of Satoru's ass, who is rutting into you, his hand coming down to stimulate your clit. 
All three of you are moaning and whimpering. Lost in the pleasure that blankets your connected bodies. By the end of it all, you're all sweaty and tired. Both men fast asleep on either side of you before you even realize it's all over. Before you even realize the shift your relationship has taken
Everything will be different tomorrow. A bigger shift in your relationship with them that could either bring you apart or closer. But you can deal with all that's changed in the morning. Right now all you want is a good night's rest.
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velvetm00light · 5 months
Text
Rescue: Spencer's POV
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gif: pinterest dividers: @benkeibear, @mariariley, @haerinism
Chapter Three of Save Me in SPENCER'S POV
Y/N'S POV: here
Previous Chapters: one, two
Word Count: 3.5k
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female Reader
Summary: You're abducted by a brutal serial killer who's been stalking you. Spencer and your entire team work tirelessly to find you. But Spencer is fighting with more than just his worry for a friend, he's finding over the guilt he feels for not telling you how he felt beforehand.
Warnings: Torture, kidnapping, dead parents, suggestions of sexual assault, knives and cutting torture, sense deprivation (sight), emotional manipulation, fear, grief. In future parts, will mention PinV, oral, domxsub situations, grief, bondage, physical harm, etc.
A/N: I feel like I don't see a lot of writings from Spencer's POV because technically it's all in the "you" perspective but I thought this would be a cool twist for ya'll to be able to read what's happening in both of their heads during the same time period! This chapter is also written in Y/N's pov so you can read that instead or skip both all together (there is a big detail at the end of Y/N's chapter so you can avoid the rest of the chapter and just read the end if you want:)). The chapters after this will be tamer but as always, warnings will be listed before the chapter!
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PANIC BEGINS TO SETTLE in his stomach as your phone rings and rings, and he only keeps getting your voicemail. "Something's wrong," Spencer chokes out, fighting back the tears threatening to spill across his cheeks. "She's not picking up. She didn't text Hotch back for her hourly check in and didn't pick up for him either."
Seeing the look plastered across Spencer's face, Morgan doesn't waste any time comforting with false hopes. They both immediately jump out of the car they've been cooped up in for the past 12 hours. Spencer's legs wobble beneath him, half from sitting in the same position for so long and the other half from the fear he feels coursing through his blood like poison.
He and Morgan race up your apartment stairs, taking them two at a time until they're face-to-face with your intact apartment door. Morgan tries the handle first, but when the door doesn't budge he ignores all other conservative options. The door gives easily under Morgan's heavy kick, and both men rush into the apartment.
The first thing Spencer notices is the blood splattered all over your living room carpet. He lets out a defeated whine and feels himself frozen in place, unable to go any further. It's obvious that whoever has been stalking you has finally grown the balls to abduct you and he begins to worry that when he finally finds the guy who took you, he just might actually kill him. Fuck that, he will fucking kill him.
He barely registers Morgan on the phone with Hotch as he slowly begins to analyze the scene before him. Your blood and spit ruining your carpet, the balcony door curtains thrown carelessly to the side, all your hidden gun compartments open and guns missing from each of them. He quickly wipes the tears that escape down his face before Morgan can notice.
"We're going to stay here and learn everything we possibly can from her apartment while the rest of them get back to the office to find this son of a bitch," Morgan explains to Spencer. "Reid, we're going to find her." Morgan lays a comforting hand on Spencer's shoulder as Spencer stays motionless, staring at the fresh blood from your face on the floor.
"If you don't think you can handle this, it's okay, Reid."
"I can handle this," Spencer breathes. He straightens his spine and goes through your entire apartment painstakingly slow. He tells himself over and over again not to miss a single detail or else he might never forgive himself for missing something that could possibly save your life.
His heart begins to hurt more and more as he notices all the locked windows, the coffee pot still sitting on the kitchen counter, the blood starting to dry on your bedroom floor, and your phone and empty gun holster resting on your nightstand. His chest constricts at the fact that he was the one who told you to rest, that he would protect you. He's unsure if he'll ever begin to forgive himself for it.
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At the round table, Spencer can't help but tell his team every single detail he noticed around your apartment. It was almost just as hard to go through your entire life as seeing your blood on your apartment floors. He and Morgan practically trashed every room, going through photo albums, your phone, and anything else they could get their hands on. Your entire team felt icky about diving into your life to such an extent but they knew you would forgive them if it meant they found you alive.
Garcia bursts into the conference room with her laptop in hand. "He hacked into the surveillance system."
"What?" Everyone's voiced echoed in unison.
"He-He hacked into the cameras. I have no idea how long he's had access or how he even managed to do it. He's gotta be mega good because I'm the best of the best and to get past all of my alarms...God, this guy is frustrating."
Spencer's breath caught in his throat. "So, he's been watching her everywhere she goes?"
"Most likely. If he can hack into our cameras I don't doubt he has access to all the cities traffic cameras, businesses security cameras.."
"We have to assume he's watching us now. We give him no indication that we know who he is," Hotch commanded. The team nods and silently resumes their work.
Random names are written on the board, random case files are scattered on the table, assuming they're all being watched.
Spencer stands frozen in front of the whiteboard, staring at your picture underneath with the word "abducted" written in angry, uppercase letters under it. He doesn't realize the entire team has gone off to do whatever Hotch has demanded of them until a gentle hand is placed on his shoulder. "We're gonna find her, Spence."
He snaps his attention to JJ, who stands tall beside him. The tears attempt to betray him again and it's almost impossible to hide them. "I..I don't know what I'd do with myself if I lost her."
"I know. We're all scared, and we all want to find this son of a bitch. But, I know, Spence. I see it."
He looks at her puzzlingly, his brain mush from the lack of sleep and the intense stress and guilt he's been drowning in.
"Spence...we all know. You two think you're so great at hiding it, but we see it. The longing, the love, the care. Just focus on getting her back so you finally have a chance to tell her."
This brought the tears flowing from his eyes and coating his cheeks. JJ wraps him in an embrace and runs a motherly hand up and down his back. "I'm afraid that I'll be too late and she'll never know how I feel," he chokes out, his tears soaking into JJ's blazer.
"You won't be, we're going to bring her home, you're going to bring her home. But, you need to focus. We need your brilliant brain more than ever right now."
He backs away from JJ's embrace, wiping his slick cheeks on his cardigan sleeve, and nods.
Their attentions are forced to the team entering back into the conference room. "Everyone look normal, we've got something to talk about," Hotch declares as your team takes their seats at the round table once more.
Garcia sits with her back away from the camera to ensure nothing on her computer can be seen, and then she begins.
"Our unsub is Blake Rixley, he's (y/n)'s foster brother. A picture of him and all his details have been sent to your phones."
"Foster brother?" Prentiss asks, her brows knitting together.
"When her parents died, she was sent to a foster home with Blake and a few other kids. She ran away when she was 11 from her foster home and from what I can find, stayed with a distant aunt until she was 18."
"Why did they send her to foster care if she had a family member she could have lived with in the first place?"
"Her aunt lived in Canada and under a different last name. Y/n managed to contact her and made her way over the boarder. How, I have absolutely no idea. But that's why I can't find anything from the age of 11-18 on her," Garcia explained.
Spencer's blood runs aflame as he imagines you at 11, a mere child, sneaking across the boarder by yourself, trying to survive on your own.
"Why did she run away?"
"I'm not sure.."
"Maybe it was because of her foster brother," Prentiss suggests. "Maybe he tried to take advantage of her, or maybe flirt with her or something and she rejected him because even though they weren't related by blood it felt wrong."
"He's also 8 years older than her..." Garcia pointed out. "He was 14 when she came into the house."
"He could have easily used his position in the house to manipulate her into doing things. Garcia, is Blake the son of the foster parents?"
Garcia types furiously on her laptop and her eyes go wide. "Yes."
Spencer's heart just about cleaves in two. He can't help but picturing you as a small child, losing your parents and being taken advantage of on top of it. Unable to bare any more information, he abruptly gets out of his chair, swinging the conference door room open, and slamming it shut behind him.
He decides to get some air to ease the bile rising in his throat.
As he makes it outside, he finally lets the pent up heartache free. He stumbles to a bench and throws himself down onto it, his body shuddering with his sobs. His thoughts come fast and heavy, suffocating him in his grief. He begins to wonder if you'll ever forgive him for suggesting you go to sleep, for not being there to protect you, for not doing enough to make sure you weren't taken in the first place, and worse of all, for not telling you how he felt from the start. He can't help but weep harder at the possibility that you might never know how he feels, how the curve of your lips distracts him just about every day of his life. How no matter how many times he sees you and even when you're together for days on end working on a case, he is still awestruck over your beauty and itches to be with you when you're apart. How he could listen to you talk about the most boring subject on earth for hours on end. How he has been completely and utterly in love with you since the day you accidentally fell asleep on his shoulder on the jet coming home from a case, shortly after you joined the Bureau.
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Spencer and Prentiss sit in a strained silence on the way back from surveying a few farms and abandoned buildings on the prospect list. After each place that turned up empty, the hole within Spencer's heart felt as if it was growing bigger and bigger, becoming a void threatening to destroy him.
Spencer has never been so frustrated in his life, and he would know. He was frustrated when he didn't even notice when one of the suspects he interviewed had Dissociative Identity Disorder and switched right in front of him. He was frustrated when an unsub kept crossing state lines and it look the team almost a week to catch up to him. He was frustrated a million times over when a new victim was found and they were not fast enough to stop the killer. But this...This really takes the cake.
The tension feels almost like a wire tethered from Spencer to the entire world, taut to almost it's breaking point. That wire of tension loosens a bit when Emily's phone rang and he allows a small bubble of hope to begin to stir.
He attempts to listen to the conversation, his body aching to rip the phone from her hand and demand to know if they've found you. Emily glimpses at Spencer for a moment, then turns her attention back to the road. "We'll be there in 5," she says as a goodbye.
She takes a deep breath, steadying herself before explaining to Spencer what she heard. "Reid, before I tell you anything, you have to promise me something."
His stomach basically fell into his ass at her tone. He wonders if sometimes people assume he's normal, and not someone who can basically detect the mood of someone like some sick sixth sense.
"We're on our way to an old farm that the unsubs father used to live on when his father was a child. I'm not going to guarantee you this is where she is. But if she is there, don't be stupid."
Emily eyes him again, judging the tells on his face. She knows better than anyone that he would love to watch the life exit this guy's body at his doing, preferably with his bare hands. If circumstances were perfect, Spencer would love to do exactly what he's done to her and worse, to the sick bastard.
"I hope he gives me a reason."
Emily doesn't have to ask what he means. She gains her composure and schools her features as they pull down a winding, dirt road. A farm looms up ahead, a sizable, wooden, red barn stands tall behind smaller disheveled shacks and barns - some sunken in on themselves, others with caved in roofs, wood slats missing off the sides. The farm looked worse for wear, and that was being generous.
Emily comes to a stop at the edge of the farm, and they are met with the rest of their team. Everyone is already adjusting their bulletproof vests, checking their guns, and discussing any last minute details to whatever plan they cracked while Spencer and Emily were away.
"Prentiss, Reid, take that cabin on the left. JJ, Morgan, take the small blue barn to the right. Rossi and I are going to stake out the parameter and we'll meet together at the big red barn in the back," Hotch explained. The entire team split up into their groups and wasted no time getting to their respective buildings.
Spencer just about jumps into a sprint towards the cabin, his heart screaming at him to go. Emily hauls after him, not judging or chastising him for his urgency. They stalk the perimeter first, peeking into the dirty windows. "I'll go in through the back, you go in through the front," Emily orders. Spencer quietly makes his way to the front, peeking again into all the windows as he passes, trying to find the son of a bitch.
They open their respective doors in unison, bursting into the small cabin. Spencer enters what appears to be a dining room and kitchen, a semi-rotten wooden table just a few feet away from a stove and countertops that probably haven't been changed out since Christ himself was born. There were empty cans scattered across the countertop and dirty dishes in the sink.
A living room sat just beyond, a half wall the only thing separating the rooms. The hardwood under his boots turn to carpet as he slowly makes his way through the house towards Emily. His attention snaps towards the sound of Emily's voice.
"Put the gun down, Blake."
Spencer picks up his pace, trying his best to stay as quiet as possible. He turns a corner and spots Emily, her gun raised and pointed at the man standing in between them, oblivious to the other agent directly behind him. He holds a shotgun, one powerful enough to probably make a hole deep enough to reach the Earth's damn core.
Emily lifts her hands up in surrender as she spots you, holstering her gun. "I just want to talk, that's all."
"It was a mistake coming here by yourself," he snarls. Spencer couldn't see his face but he was damn sure this sick bastard was probably smiling.
"Put the gun down so we can talk," she tries again.
"I'm not a fucking fool! Of course you don't want to just talk," he growls. Spencer almost pulls his trigger just by the way the man in front of him begins to shake with anger, his shotgun rattling softly in his hands.
"If you cooperate we can help you, we know what she did. She hurt you, Blake,"
Spencer's fingers tighten around the grip of his gun. He isn't sure he can stand to listen to Emily blame you for all of this. He knows she doesn't mean it, but it doesn't make it hurt any less.
"Unlucky for you, I promised a certain someone I would teach her lesson for that specific reason," he says smugly. All too quickly, he cocks the shotgun and takes aim and before Spencer can even hesitate, he squeezes the trigger.
The man slumps to the ground between them. His chest heaving in small, shallow breaths as a pool of blood begins to form underneath him. Spencer leans down to the mans face and whispers, "I would kill you a million times over again for what you took from her, but I guess once one time is just going to have to be enough."
The man's eyes swell in rage until they hold nothing inside them at all. Spencer stands up slowly and meets Emily's gaze. "You did the right thing," she claims, patting his shoulder as she walks by him and out of the cabin.
After one last look at the man who within a few days has taken everything from the women he loves and the woman he loves from him, he follows Prentiss out of the cabin and toward the red barn.
After a short walk, they reach the looming barn doors. "I think we should wait," Emily starts but Spencer cuts her off. "He's already dead. I'm not letting her be here a moment longer, she's suffered enough."
Before Emily can argue, Spencer swings open the barn doors and just about falls to his damn knees at the sight. "She's here!" He calls. He and Emily rush to you, instantly grabbing at the handcuffs around your wrists. As you're released, he falls to the floor along side you, trying to avoid a hard impact with the floor. "(Y/n)?" He whimpers, feeling for a pulse.
"Take it off.." you whimper. His heart cleaves in two. The sight of you battered, sliced open, and isolated inside a metal mask makes him want to crawl into the depths of hell just to kill the fucking bastard again.
"I'm trying.." He fumbles with the straps on the mask, his hands trembling so terribly he can barely grip the straps.
"Take it off!" you cry, ripping at the mask with your fingernails. His hands pick up speed.
"(Y/n), please, I'm trying. Hold on.."
The mask finally releases and he lets out a relieved sigh. You curl up into him and let out shuddering sobs that pain him to the ends of the Earth. All he wishes is to be able to stop the grief and pain you're experiencing. "I'm here, you're safe now," he coos, running a gentle hand through your hair in comforting strokes.
When your cries begin to quiet, he softly grabs the sides of your head and lifts your eyes up to meet his face, slick with tears and battered to hell with stress.
"Spencer.." you choke out, throwing your hands around his neck. "I'm so sorry..."
Rage courses through him, "(Y/n), why? You have absolutely nothing to be sorry about." It kills him to hear you apologizing for this. He wants to do nothing more than you spill out his whole mind to you, but he isn't sure it would even help in this moment.
"He..he told me he would hurt you, all of you, if I fought back."
Tears well up in his eyes and he embraces you again, attempting to hide the fact that he's been crying this entire time. "I'm here."
You lift your gaze to his as you whimper out, "Spencer..."
"Yes, love?" He responses, cupping your wet cheek with a calloused hand.
"The only thing that got me through...what he did, was you."
He truly didn't think anything could have made this worse. He should be ecstatic that he's the reason you survived, that he was able to help you get through it even though he wasn't there to save you originally. But..he just can't find it in himself to be happy about it. You should have never had to go through this in the first place, and worse, you had to go through things he can't even begin to fathom probably thinking everything will always just be a fantasy. "I am so sorry."
"You found me," you smile sadly up at him.
As paramedics rush into the barn, Spencer lays you on the floor so they can reach and treat all of your wounds. He couldn't help feeling hollow and empty pulling away from you. "Don't leave.." you whine, and he greedily grabs your outstretched hand. He continues to hold your hand in comfort the entire walk to the ambulance and as they continue working on you on the way to the hospital.
"I love you," you whisper and he can tell you've already fallen asleep, using the last of your energy doing the one thing he wished he was man enough to do before.
"I love you, too." He whispers back, kissing the back of your hand. He felt the need to say it back right then and there whether you heard him or not. He aches to tell you everything he feels about you and can't wait to finally tell you to your face rather than keep everything in his brain this time.
He stares at you the entire ride to the hospital, monitoring your breathing, his eyes roaming from each cut on your body, the bruises forming on your abdomen, and the exhausted look on your face. He is grateful this part is over, but a whole new difficult journey lays ahead. But, he's not afraid. He's ready to be at your side every second of the day possible, and he's ready to be your savior.
TAG LIST: @qatiee @dottirose @thisaintredwine @jay-2s-world @ruziazyn
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bellgraves · 6 months
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There are some headcanons I like to think about Graves. I have this feeling that in the beggining when he starts to date you, he will be this respectful gentleman who buys you flowers and jewerly, take you to expensive restaurant, kiss your hand and being overall very nice and charming.
But slowly you will notice that he likes to curse, say inappropriate jokes (he will blame it for spending too much time with Shadows, because most of them are men, and they're just like that).
When the time will come to have sex with him, he will show his true nature. He will be wild, dominate, rough, and talk you through it. I'm 100% convinced that he will say really dirty things. He is a professional mercenary, he travels the world and kills people all the time, bet he needs that stress and adrenaline to release it in bed with you. But I think if you ask him to "make sweet love" to you slowly with passion he will do it too. When he sleeps next to you, he looks very innocent, sometimes scratching his scars. He will also sometimes have some convulsions during sleep and mumble commands, because he is dreaming about being on battlefield, so you will have to caress him and hug him to your chest so he can calm down. 😔 He will cling into you and bury his face into your boobs, feeling safe.
I think he has anger issues too but tries to hide them. If he doesn't like something he will suddenly yell and then be like "ekhm... sorry about that." He likes to drink alcohol but he is not alcoholic. But he does get carried away sometimes and when drunk he will stand on the balcony and yell "I have rockets!!" 🤭😁 and you will have to tug him back to room while he will continue to say stuff like " I will blow up those son of bitches!" 😜 The next day he will pretend that he doesn't remember anything.
You got to be prepared that he will stalk you, as he said himself there is no place that he can't find, also he uses a lot of new technology so, he will know your every move.
Don't cheat on him with other guy. He might just blow up his head with semtex and come to tell you that "It didn't have to be like that"... 😼 I don't actually think that he would cheat on you with other woman. Yeah maybe he is a backstabber but I don't feel that he would cheat on his gf/wife. He is absolutely loyal to people who he respects and think they deserve his loyalty (General Shepard, Shadows), so I really think he would not betray his significant other if he loves her.
You will be totally safe with him. If someone would try to hurt you...God help them, because they will see the difference between military and him 😉
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skullghoulz · 4 days
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More Miguel x Cilivian head cannons? Pretty Please? 🎀 I loved the other one so much 🩷
ofc i was free tonight so i wanted to not keep you waiting on this hope you dm how i’m setting it up also apologies i turned it into a mini vacation on the first bit HAHAA || sfw, no reader pronouns mentioned 💌
- the two of you communicate through your wrist-watches, he has of course gotten you one, not like you needed to traverse dimensions like he did, but you sure had the option to
- in the past, you made use of taking a random trip to the beach, just for a day or two. you both had the watch, so it was a no brainer? why not?
- it was pretty chill, miguel didn’t swim much unless you dragged him into the ocean. remained under the umbrella for most of the time to watch you from the shore. sometimes he’d get nervous if you went out far, that was usually when he’d get in, usually carrying you out into the deeper ends of the ocean because he was able to hold you, and not to mention his height which made it easier for you to explore and find seashells
- it’s fun when you go out in the deep because he gets to hold you, though not really scary
- tried out lots of fun foods during your short visit, found he has a particular liking for mangonadas (spicy mexican mango drink, lots of tajin and chamoy, pretty good drink imo)
- was pretty much at your side at the beach 24/7 otherwise there was no way he was going to stray away from you
-possessive?.. sometimes 😭 all the time will not let it go when he catches someone staring you down, his glare at them is 100x worse
- during the evenings, you both chilled outside on the balcony, just relaxing at the sound of the ocean
(i may turn this into a fic in the future)
grocery shopping!
- you guys go thinking you’ll only get a couple of things, but it was the opposite, you ended up with a cart full of items
- miguel puts in LOTS of sweet stuff in the cart
it’s insane you thought you liked sweet stuff? he likes it tenfold moreso
- you can’t say no to him not really, and the same goes for him, whatever you want
- when it comes to random spiderman memorabilia, he gets all awkward when you come up to him w/ spiderman 2099 merch, especially the plushies, it kills him
- he’ll insist that you DON’T need it, yet it somehow ends up in the cart anyway. has caught you one to many times cuddled up on the couch with a spider plushie of him
- when it’s time to pay you just close your eyes and pretend not to see the amount, it’s too damaging for both of your eyes (frick inflation)
- plays video games on the DL with you, is mediocre at most LOL
- sometimes it gets competitive between the two of you, one wants to one up the other, leading to late night gameplays
-both of you loooove to sleep in, there’s been days when you both haven’t really moved much at all, of course these are days when he miraculously has an off day
- miguel is the best (and only person you’re willing to cuddle with) it’s what you both do to go to sleep
- sometimes comes home late to see you up doing your thing on your tablet, wondering ??? why the heck are you up go to sleep
- sometimes wakes you up by doing something at an unreasonable hour, the glow of his watch bright on his face
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natwrites08 · 7 months
Text
“Love Story” (Mason Mount x FemReader)
Series Part 2
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Summary: After her fiancé leaves her days before her wedding, she has to learn to love herself and accept the love that others provide for her, and maybe she will let Mason Mount into her life, but only if he learns to do the same. (MM x FemReader)
Word Count: 5.2K
Warnings: Angst, Fluff, body and mental insecurities, wedding nightmares, verbal abuse (Let me know if I missed anything). 
a/n: This is the second part of the story, Enjoy!!! beware Mason will be a bit mean here. Part 1 HERE 
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She was not selfish, she could’ve used him, but she let him go, everything escalated quickly, that she couldn’t react, she needed to let him go to not hurt him. She warned him that she wasn’t ready but he didn’t listen, and here she was suffering. The messages stopped and her life once again was empty. 
Leah couldn’t believe it, apparently her and Ben were rooting for them to end up together. But here she was one month later and she couldn’t stop thinking about him. Her life was colorless before him, during him it had color, because it was so easy to love his kindness, but again even kindness can be used to manipulate a person and Mason did just that. 
A dinner party hosted by Leah was where her suspicions were correct about Mason. She had to take some air, Leah’s balcony was spacious, which meant that Mason could follow and he did all that. She remembers the first lunch dinner they had with loving gazes and looks of worry, but now his malicious eyes followed her, mumbling stuff that weren’t heard from her distance, but Ben heard and he kept on jabbing his side and everytime she spoke his mumbles would follow, so she needed a bit of a break from him. 
“Finally you’re wearing a color that suits you” of course he was here to hurt her, but she didn’t want to engage so she ignored him, but that didn’t stop him from talking.
“Black suits you so much better, you would take the happiness away from pink, such a beautiful color should be kept away from you” so she just nodded her head agreeing with me, ignoring a person was more lethal, and Mason hated being ignored.
“I see that you’re still miserable, still thinking about why Liam didn’t want you, why you weren’t good enough for him?”
“Maybe he was on to something, I never got to hear his side of the story”
“You’re right you didn’t hear from him, but I’ll give you his number, maybe the two pricks can relate” 
“Make sure you write it down for me, since I blocked your number” 
“Ok, Mason, anything else?”
“No just wanted to remind you why you’re alone” 
“Thanks for that, I don’t need a reminder for that, but at the end of the day I live in peace with my own company unlike you, you try to surround yourself with people so you don’t feel alone, but you’re right I’m alone, have a good night Mason” 
Just like that she said her goodbye to Leah and Ben, her teary eyes did not go unnoticed by them, they offered her a lift to her flat, but she left. 
“It’s dark Ben, she can’t walk far all alone, follow her” 
“Ok, but I swear that I will kill Mason, so wait here”
“What did you tell her you prick?”
“Don’t remember, not important enough” 
“Well the dinner just ended, I have to follow her because she is walking home alone and in the dark, probably crying looking like an easy prey…”
“Stop making me feel bad…”
“I’m not making you feel bad Mason, we told you that she was fragile and you still held that against her…”
“Where are you going, Mase?”
“I’m following her, thanks for dinner guys”
“Take care of her Mase” 
“I will” 
There she was walking, she looked terrified, her shoulders looked a bit tense. So he stopped his car next to her while rolling down the window. 
“Get in” 
“No thanks”
“I’m not leaving until you get in, please it’s late out”
“I don’t get you at all, just keep driving”
“You don’t have to get me to know that you’re in danger, so please get in”
“If I get in you will not open your mouth at all, got it”
“Yes, now get in cars are coming”
How she was meant to walk thirty minutes away from her home, he had no idea, but at least she was safe. Not once did she look straight, always looking out through the window. Honestly her eyes were still filled with tears that were threatening to come out, and his presence was not helping. When they arrived to her home he did not unlock the car so she waited. 
“Can you look at me?”
She looked his way, but never made eye contact, with a long sigh he talked. 
“No matter how mad you are, never risk your safety like that”
“I thought you didn’t care”
“Of course I care”
“Yeah I don’t believe you Mason, not after the balcony, not after you compared me to your ex, I’m nothing like her, because I did appreciate everything you did for me, but in a way you still let me down, and you just couldn’t hear no…”
“What does that even mean?”
“That you couldn’t deal with the idea that I wasn’t going to love you, that another girl rejected you, but I did it for your own good not for mine, I knew that you would’ve been good for me, but I was the one that couldn’t give you the warmth and love that you desire or deserve, so I’m sorry in case I didn’t apologize before but I wasn’t selfish” 
“Yes you were selfish, depriving yourself of feeling loved, because again you’d rather live in misery then accept me, because misery is your comfort”
“Mason you don’t understand”
“Then help me understand, because I tried to be mean, but I can’t be vile to you, my throat was burning with all the lies I said”
“Yet you still used my insecurities against me”
“I’m sorry, and I mean it” 
“Mason, I…”
“I want us to work out our differences, but for four months we just got to know each other, but we closed off, we were very open in the beginning and then out of nowhere talking about our past was so painful that we just exploded, I’m sorry that I got so mad that day, but I genuinely thought that you would listen”
“I tried but I just needed to know what it was like losing you, and I can’t tell you that it was more painful…”
“More painful than what? Him walking away?”
“Yes, him walking away. You left in bad terms with me, I was the bad guy this time”
“I think that we were both in the wrong, look just be honest love I can’t function if I don’t see you, the first week I had to stop myself from texting you just because it was instinct, so please let’s talk more about everything” 
“What else can we talk about?”
“Everything love, tell me about your life before, during and after his decision, I want to relate to you, I want to know why love is not in the books for you, I want to understand you” 
“You want to talk about this here or inside?”
“I don’t know, inside?”
“Ok let’s go, but if you judge me Mason, I’ll kill you” 
“I promise I won’t”
The walk to her flat was intense, it was probably a couple of steps to her front door and he couldn’t function, he didn’t have enough time to gather his thoughts. What if her story is so heartbreaking that he couldn’t respond back to her. 
“You can sit Mason, you’ve been here plenty of times”
“Ok what if I tell you all about me first, not the basics but everything else, like my issue with love.”
“Ok go for it”
“Well I met Lana a year after making my move to Manchester, she was beautiful so full of vibrancy, she was smart and outgoing, very similar to me, she was a doctor for children a pediatrician, meaning she was always very busy, so instead of blaming her job, for the busy schedules, she blamed mine, even though I did everything I could to find the time she always used my career against me. So as a solution I proposed because I was crazy for her, she loved kids and so did I, she had a stable job, and she was perfect in my eyes until she said no…”
She saw how his pupils became twice as big, as if he went to the darkest time of his life. She had those same eyes every time she looked in the mirror. The sadness mixed with the anger, and with the few happy moments that he lived. The pain of thinking you found the one and then they break your heart, that’s what his eyes were saying, filled with regret and betrayal.
“She said that I was too intense that I was rushing a two year relationship, that she was a doctor, that she was too busy for a marriage, that she didn’t want to carry kids, that she didn’t want to be a housewife yet she made all of that up because I would never tell her to stop her career for me, but with you…”
“With me what?”
“I’ll tell you once you tell me” 
“You’re always so sneaky Mason, but I’ll tell you. I met him in a class I took for finance, he was a businessman, owned a bunch of houses in his hometown. So you could also say he was in a stable condition to be my husband. He took me out on many luxurious dates, bought me this nice home when we reached two years together, and that same day by the dinner table he proposed, you can imagine my anguish every time I walk by it. The ring was beautiful but it looked and was cheap, always making me look like an object, like I was an accessory for him. Dinner dates with his mates were different then the ones we have with Leah and Ben. You guys always made me comfortable, your reassuring smile every time or when we were more comfortable, your hand on my knee….”
Her loud sobs made him come to his senses and he quickly wiped her tears away, that reassuring hand on her knee and those kind eyes, made her continue.
“He was nice Mason, I knew he was because I have better judgment, but maybe I was blinded by the fantasy of having a love story. He was always giving in a way but only items, never what I wanted, which was his love, I wanted him to be proud of me, to tell me that I was much more than just a woman for him. So when I was trying my wedding dress for the last fitting he saw me in it, but he left me crying when he told me that he never wanted to see me again because he found someone better, someone that wouldn’t embarrass him in front of his mates, someone that would fit into nicer clothes, he told me that he proposed to shut me up, because he felt sorry for me…”
At that moment he realized that he was holding her knee tightly, until he felt her hand on top of his, now they were both holding hands. His anger could be felt he had no idea why anyone would make someone suffer so much, sure Lana broke his heart, but she did it to save her career to not be tied down, sure she was a hypocrite but maybe he simply didn’t love her enough. Maybe she didn’t feel loved by him, but this beautiful and strong girl in front of him, would get the best version of him, her own love story with him. 
“…and The worst thing is that I should’ve broken the engagement because he verbally abused me after his proposal, every day it was something different, he looked confident like he found someone better, more stable then when I met him, he was even desirable to other women, he was handsome enough to be with me if you know what I mean, but this woman was beautiful, glowing already because she was pregnant when he broke my heart, she was waiting in the car. I was left in the middle of the room with my mother looking at me with the ‘I told you so’ look, and after that I didn’t get the support I needed, until I started working with Leah, it’s a tedious job but I had to pay this house and live comfortably and now I love it. So the last time I saw him they came to pick up his stuff, she looked embarrassed, but I hope that he treats her right, so now tell me what you were going to say”
“Before I want to tell you that, you happen to be the most beautiful girl in the world, and with you it’s different, I was instantly drawn to you, maybe because we shared the same pain or because we finally saw what love is actually like, you told me that you felt like nothing that you had nothing but that’s not true because you have all of me, and you can have everything with me, that guy didn’t deserve your kindness or your love, I will repeat myself you are the most beautiful woman in the world, you don’t deserve any pain baby. I know that together we will be happy, of course if you let me, I don’t want to be too much, or scare you away, but I love you and that’s enough for me, the day when I saw you actually smile and laugh on the swing I felt this explosion in my soul, in a few weeks I loved you, you were capable of bringing love back into my life, and I’m forever grateful for that, in one month of you being gone I suffered more than those three years…I love you, again you don’t have to say it, but I…” 
She quickly put her finger on his lips as a way to silence him. “Shut up Mase, I’m not sure if I can say it yet, but I know that what I feel for you is very strong, and I have no issue in the possibility of us, because my judgment is correct with you, you’re honest and loving. I want to thank you Mase, for the very first time I feel loved, and it’s a great feeling when it’s actually genuine, I have no fear Mase, you took that away from me, now I only want to let loose, continue making me feel at the top of the world, let’s say goodbye to the ghosts of our past.”
With her finger still on his lip he mumbled making her laugh, with his cocky smile and teasing eyes. “Let’s do that baby, I’ll be here with you, I’ll be patient and I’ll continue loving you and proving myself to you” 
“You don’t have to do that Mason, I’m already happy with this version of you, but please do continue loving me” 
“Can I hug you?” With a nod, he wasted no time in taking her into his arms. The way she clung to his shoulders, her tears soaking his neck, made him realize that all she needed was to feel loved just like him, to not feel the loneliness within her. The kisses that were placed all over her face calmed her down, and eventually she fell asleep. She woke up in his arms on the sofa where they discussed their relationship. She was exhausted after a very stressful day. He looked beautiful while he slept, his long eyelashes, the shape of his lips, His pink cheeks filled with freckles had the dimples showing, he had a slight smile, which meant that he was happy and relaxed. 
The tracing of his beard is what brought him back from his sleep. His eyes slightly fluttered, trying to shake off the sunlight. “Good morning Mase”, his arm flinched, but that only made him hold her tighter. 
“Are you a grumpy person in the morning?”
“Your home is too bright, good morning love” his deep morning voice could kill her. He sounded very attractive. 
“I think that you’re grumpy, but how about I make some breakfast for us” she tried to stand up but he only pulled her back. 
“I’d rather just stay here, no breakfast, I can live without it, but I can’t live without your warmth”
“Don’t be dramatic, grumpy, you will get lots of cuddles from me after breakfast, unless you have training or other activities…”
“Today I’m all yours, but I will have to go home to shower and change.”
“There’s no need I have men clothes here”
“Yeah? From who?”
“The clothes are not Liam’s, I just like sleeping with big t-shirts they are comfortable so I tend to buy men clothes, even boxers, I’m weird, so don’t be jealous”
“Well that’s perfect because you will have all my clothes to wear, I’m not a jealous person just so you know I trust you so much”
“I’ll have so many flashy clothes then”
“Oi, I’m not that flashy with my clothes I like a simple style” 
“I never said it was too much, it suits you, but I’d rather you stay the whole day with me, I’ll wash your clothes” 
“As if I’ll let you wash anything of mine, remember domestic chores will be done together, I’ll have no problem washing your stuff though”
“Perfect you will wash my whole basket of clothes today, my jealous friend” 
“If you add boy in front of friend then that statement will be true” 
“Well you haven’t officially asked me the question, have you?, maybe I’ll do it…”
“Be my girlfriend baby! I think that we will be perfect for one another, I’m sure Ben and Leah will be happy, even Leah’s mum”
“Ok Mase I’ll be your girlfriend but remember everything in time ok” 
“Yes love, now how about both of us make breakfast?”
“Ok what do you like?”
“Some toast and coffee”
“That’s not breakfast, some eggs with that maybe” 
“Whatever you want love” 
She felt at peace even making breakfast was exciting, she was done with the comparisons, Liam and Mason were the complete opposite, and Mason deserved nothing but the best, from now on, no more of her past, she knows that there will be hard days but everything will change she will be happy. 
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Mason didn’t make her feel like a convenience, someone who he could want and throw away in the same day, she was not a toy, someone that you could love and break just because you were in a mood to cause pain, to abandon. Mason was also not a confusing man he wanted and craved all of her, she wasn’t his sometimes, she was his everything and in the three months that they were together he proved that he couldn’t live without her absence. 
Three wonderful months, she had known him for longer but they were finally together, enjoying the little things about one another. She knew when he was lying, she knew when he was sad or angry, when he was happy or in pain, it was easy to know because he was an open book, he never made her guess, he wasn’t the scared boy she met, the one that was afraid to share his thoughts, now they had each other, every struggle and every achievement was shared. 
Sure she loved hearing his I love you’s, but it was more than that, through every action he did prove that love. He didn’t sound like a broken record, repeating the same three words with no emotion, not because he needed to say them but because he wanted to. What’s better than wanting to be loved, cause for so long she believed that it was impossible to want or even feel loved, but here he was showing her that in reality needing and wanting were the same thing, he needed her, but also wanted her with him every day. 
She was moving on, she wanted to move to another place, a smaller place, somewhere that wasn’t haunted with the memories of her past. So she found the perfect home, a small two bedroom apartment, with a decent size kitchen, perfect for cooking. It also had the best commute, close to Mason and even to Leah. So she sold her home, partially furnished, she made enough money to live comfortably for a few months, and she was glad that she sold it to a nice couple with two kids, at least they will enjoy the size of the yard. She was glad that she was closing another chapter of her life. 
So here she was painting the walls, white walls in every room except one. Mason gave her the beautiful idea that she needed to paint at least one wall pink. She couldn’t live in black and white, she needed a color that would bring her comfort, and what better than pink. Her room would be pink, so that every day they would wake up happy. Mason loved spending the night when he had the chance, so of course she wanted him to feel comfortable in her place, just like his home that had a desk and wardrobe for her. 
“Do you like the color love, I think that it suits us”
“I think that you picked the best shade of pink”
“Maybe I should paint my walls as well, to not feel so homesick when you’re there”
“It’s up to you, but would your ugly navy sheets match the pink walls?”
“I promise that I would change them to a nice gray just for you” 
“You don’t have to do anything to make me feel at home, just as long as you’re with me” 
“You could’ve moved in with me love, but I understand why you told me no”
“Hey silly, we will do eventually I promise, but I had to move from that place, besides you can live with me if you want to”
“Don’t tempt me love because I’ll pack right now” 
“We practically live with each other so I don’t see a problem with that, but please Mason…”
“I know love don’t rush” her calculated steps towards him, made him stop painting. Gently pulling his face towards her, she kissed his lips. Every time she kisses him, it’s like the first time. 
Kiss Flashback-
They were dancing in the kitchen again, she always thought that it was only in movies or books but it was real. It was her the one that kissed him, one week into dating and she knew that he didn’t know how to ask, so she asked for him. Literally left him speechless and all flustered, and her intense eye contact was horrible. 
“Or you don’t want a kiss?”
“No I do, but I was…” so she kissed him, took him by complete surprise, the hardest part was having the courage to reach his lips, to pull him close. But his soft lips were perfect against hers, she knew that he would be perfect. It was passionate, never becoming overwhelming or dominant. Gently moving their lips, exploring and savoring their taste. It had to be about comfort, no rushing, enough to leave them breathless and wanting more. Eventually he had to pull away still keeping his hand on her cheek, thumb tracing her jaw, the one that was tight from her huge smile. 
“Sorry I just…” but a tiny peck was placed on her lips to stop all her doubts. 
“Don’t apologize love, thanks for having the courage to kiss me, I didn’t know how to approach the subject, I lost all my confidence”
“To be fair I wanted to kiss you since the wedding, you just look so soft while you dance with me”
“So let's keep dancing so you can keep kissing me”
“Ok, but please don’t be afraid, kiss me whenever you want”
End Flashback-
That kiss started a bit of a painting fight, where the paint ended up on her shirt and cheek. She had to rush to the bucket to also cover his cheek and jeans. They were literally covered in pink, the color that brought them together, her happy color, the one that also made him feel at home. All of a sudden he pulls her to him, in a simple embrace, gently shuffling from side to side.
“I picked this color because I think that it’s the same color you wore to the wedding, if I remember correctly” 
“Yeah I think it is, and now we’re covered in pink” 
“I love you, do you know that?”
“I think that you’ve mentioned it a couple of times”
“Well I do love you, I’m even painting your home when I should be resting”
“Well guess what?”
“I hate this game because it’s never what I want to hear” 
“I love you, is that what you wanted to he…”  he wasted no time in kissing her, now this kiss had every emotion, she was melting and at least he was there to hold her. Forehead against forehead he was smiling, the biggest smile ever. 
“It was perfect love, you saying it was beautiful,but you love me?”
“Of course Mase, why wouldn’t I, you make me feel at the top of the world, before you I thought that finding love meant finding forgiveness, but that isn’t true because you don’t have to forgive to forget, with every touch, every smile, and every tender kiss you made me feel loved, that I was good enough, you dusted those negative memories. You proved that my love shouldn’t stay hidden, that it’s not forbidden for me to love again just because my heart was broken, you didn’t fix me because I never asked you to, but you knew that I was never damaged, it was all about growing and learning together, that’s why I love you”
“Now you’re going to make me cry, I love you so much, I always felt that I was used even though I always gave so much, but with you everything is better, I knew it the moment I saw you, you listened to even my silence, you are everything to me baby”
“That’s beautiful mase, but you’re the one that’s so easy to love, so kind, so funny, so soft, so gentle I could go on, but you mean everything to me” 
“How about we stop painting and we just rest?” With one last kiss they washed their face, and changed into clean clothes and the whole day they cuddled and watched movies. He would randomly yell I love you to see if she repeated the words, not that he didn’t believe her, but it was everything he wanted to hear, and every time with a little laugh she would say those three important words back.  
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Five months later and they were happier than ever, officially they had been dating for less than a year, but it seemed like they knew each other ages ago. He did end up painting his wall, and she did end up moving in with him because her flat flooded. So in a way that tragedy allowed them to live out their romantic fantasies with one another, although he was there to comfort and help her out emotionally. 
In every aspect he was always so attentive, he provided her with a lot of his time, never missing film night, or even her important events that Leah would host. Not to mention that they would be the godparents to baby Chilwell, Leah was four months along, they broke the news in their monthly dinner get together. 
They were a couple that always believed in talking about their feelings, miscommunication was their worst enemy, so any little fight or argument was quickly resolved. They were adults, ready to work through any obstacle, and they did just that because they would get their happy ever after. 
During their one year anniversary, when she was twenty-nine he proposed. He took her to the same park where he fell in love, he got down on his knee and the most intricate ring was shown. 
Flashback-
“Mase where are you taking me baby? I hate being left in the dark”
“Don’t worry baby, we’re almost there, it’s a surprise”
“But why did you blindfold me, do you not trust me to close my eyes”
“Love, I know you and you would peek, so it’s necessary, besides we’re here” 
“That was fast, where are we?” 
“Wait ok, I will go to you” with a nod from her, he went to help her out of the car, carefully holding her waist and guiding her towards the swings, he was glad that it was empty or else his plan would’ve been ruined. 
“Ok I’ll remove the blindfold” he was standing directly in front of her, removing the blindfold, but when she slowly started to adjust to the light, he wasn’t in eye level with her instead he was kneeling down to propose. He saw her shocked eyes, and how her eyes slowly started to become teary, especially when she saw the tiny ring with pink stones. 
“I hope you know how much you changed my perception of love, you mean everything to me, and I want us to be forever. Your arms, your lips, your presence, your love brings me so much peace, and I want to have that for the rest of my life, we deserve that after feeling alone, we never have to feel alone again, because you saved me. So please baby I will be the happiest man in the world if you marry me, so marry me?”
“It’s common courtesy to say yes, so yes Mason I’ll be happy to marry you” as he was sliding the ring on her finger, her smile was mirroring the same one from a year ago. He quickly took her in his arms, the relief he felt. The curve of his neck was home to her happy tears, in a way she was also relieved that it was never too late to find love.
 “I love you Mase” 
“I love you so much Darling, thank you” 
“No, thank you…” and they both laughed, maybe their past traumas made this even more real, more beautiful and serious.
“I think we’re both grateful for the love we have for each other, I’ll make you the happiest girl in the world” 
“You don’t have to do much Mase, I’m already at the top of the world with you” 
It wasn’t so much love when they first met at the wedding but it was familiarity, like they knew that they would find their love story together. He was warm and familiar, he was there to protect and make her feel safe, and she was there to provide the same kind of love to him. He married the love of his life, and of course she did the same, she found the perfect man, who would never make her feel like she was living alone. And of course she got married in a pink wedding gown, the color of their love. 
The End….
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a/n: Thank you so much for reading this short series, I feel like Mason is perfect for these stories. I hope you enjoyed the theme of pink in the story. I don’t have much planned for stories, only the pedri series and another Mason one-shot. Like always lots of love- Nat ❤️
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rip-us-xoxo · 10 months
Text
Rafe Cameron NSFW Alphabet
Here's my NSFW alphabet for Rafe Cameron! Make sure to give me your ideas and requests! I hope you like this!
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Rip-us-xoxo's 100 Followers Alphabet Celebration!
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A - Aftercare (what they're like after sex)
The moment Rafe is done with you, he'll find your clothes that are scattered all over the floor. He always searches for his boxer briefs first, letting you collect your thoughts in peace. When he finds your underwear and shirt, he hands them to you, flashing you his signature smirk. He'll then leave the room to get water for the two of you. No words are really spoken, his smile says it all. Then, depending on the day, he'll either sit next to you while you two rehydrate, or he'll have you stand on the balcony with him and talk while drinking your water.
B - Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and yours)
I feel like Rafe is a waist type of guy. For example, he loves grabbing onto your waist when he pulls you in for a kiss. Or, when you two are at a party, he'll stand there with his arm around your waist. He used to wrap his arms around girls' shoulders at parties, but that was when he was high or drunk out of his mind. Putting his arm around your waist truly shows that you're his.
C - Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
I feel like he always ends up cumming on your stomach. I mean, he would obviously love to cum inside of you because what guy doesn't want to cum inside you? But, if you two aren't ready for kids yet, he's not taking any chances. Cumming on your stomach is the easiest for the position you guys are in.
D - Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory). a dirty secret of theirs)
Rafe loves finger fucking you with the family ring on and not washing it off. You love it when he finger fucks you with his ring on, but what you don't know is that you are always on that said ring. He doesn't do anything weird with it afterward, but it's his own way of always having you with him. Also, when he shakes people's hands, he just chuckles to himself, remembering your most recent night together.
E - Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)
Rafe is experienced enough. But, since he's always in his head, he's always thinking of things he wants to do to you, which makes the sex all the more better and exciting.
F - Favorite position (this goes without saying)
He loves when you lay on the bed with your hips over the edge while he stands at the foot of the bed and fucks you. He loves to hold your waist too. He grips your sides while the thrusts into you, giving him more control, which he loves.
G - Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
At first, he'll be serious but smiley with you. At first, he couldn't look you in the eyes without chuckling. But as you two get closer and closer in your relationship, he'll become more serious, always asking you who's in charge to make sure he'll always have control over something.
H - Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
Rafe keeps himself very well-groomed. He doesn't want anyone to mistake him for a pogue.
I - Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
He's very romantic in front of people and behind the bedroom door. He loves being close to you at all times. He'll hold you by your waste and grab your hand, kissing your knuckles. But, in the bedroom, he loves kissing from your stomach to your lips. There are times though when he won't be as romantic with you and he'll talk about himself a lot, which can kill the mood at times.
J - Jack off (masturbatiom headcanon)
I don't think Rafe is too into masturbating when he has the real thing next to him at all times. But, I can see Rafe masturbating in the shower to the thought of you.
Maybe you two got into an argument and you can't even look at him because you're so mad. But, you just so happened to wear a little sun dress that turned him on so much to the point that he couldn't ignore the bulge in his pants. So, he angrily tells you he's taking a shower and proceeds to mumble your name while imagining fucking you in your little sun dress on the beach.
K - Kink (one or more of their kinks)
I don't think Rafe really has any kinks until later in the relationship. At first, he just loves being in control. Then, it turns into a dom and sub kink, not a daddy kink, but the thought of you submitting to him always puts a smile on his face. But, I feel like later on, as you two talk about having a family, he develops a breeding kink. The thought of him having his own family to flaunt around and spoil is something he can't get out of his mind until he finally gets you pregnant.
L - Location (favorite places to do the do)
Rafe loves fucking you in the master bedroom with the curtains to the balcony open. It reminds him of everything that is his. Even though he has the curtains open, it's still private because it's his property and he can do what he wants, or who he wants, on it.
M - Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Any time you want to make him horny after he has a meeting, you just make yourself look pretty and wait for him. The moment he walks in the door, you treat him really well, like fixing him a drink and making him dinner. This usually elicits the reaction of, "What did I do to deserve this, hm?". Then, when you say, "It just must be so hard being the man of the family and you always take such good care of me, I just wanted to return the favor," you have him instantly. His pants will tighten right away and you two are in the bedroom before he even finishes his meal.
N - No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)
Being a sub. The thought of him fully submitting to you weirds him out. He needs to be in control at all times. He might let you be on top at times, but he's always in control.
O - Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
He loves getting head on the balcony (he can do what he wants on his property, remember?). But he loves giving head even more. He's good at it too. He loves taking care of you; making sure you're comfortable and then giving you a night of pleasure.
P - Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual?)
I feel like he keeps a slower pace but rams into you with every thrust.
Q - Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Rafe likes having quickies at parties sometimes because the applause he gets from his friends always boosts his ego. But, he prefers to have sex formally on his bed
R - Risk (are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)
He likes taking risks. He's always thinking of new things to do with you. Sometimes he'll give into things that you think of, but only if it's something that lets him be in control.
S - Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
In my head, Rafe can go for awhile, like 3-4 rounds? He would start off the night slow but then get faster and rougher as the night goes on.
T - Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
I feel like Rafe doesn't really like toys since it's not him giving you the pleasure but I feel like he'd buy you one when he finds out he has to go away for a business trip.
U - Unfair (how much they like to tease)
He loves to tease you, he always has his signature smirk on while you're whining.
V - Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
He pants, he doesn't moan, he just pants.
W - Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
This is very specific, but I feel like Rafe is the type to look up when he fucks. He'll look you in the eyes, but as he gets more and more tired, he'll look up while slightly sticking his tongue out, focusing on keeping it together for your pleasure.
X - X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)
Rafe gives me 5-inch thick dick vibes.
Perfect, in other words.
Y - Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
I feel like he has a super high sex drive like I said 3-4 rounds. But like long rounds.
Z - Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Rafe doesn't fall asleep easily. He'll sit up against the headboard while you lay in his lap, thinking about everything going on. He'll stare at the ceiling while caressing your hair. Every once in a while, he'll look at you and smile, remembering that no matter what he did wrong, he did one thing right in his life.
Rip-us-xoxo's 100 Followers Alphabet Celebration!
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jaeyunverse · 2 years
Text
study lessons
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pairing: park jongseong x fem!reader
genres: fluff, angst, strangers to lovers, slight rivals to lovers, pining, high school au, jock x tutor au
wc: 12344
warnings: profanity, childish bickering, mentions of medical terms, mentions of infidelity (no one cheats), jay has a few dark thoughts, mentions of self hatred, reader mocks jay for not being academically bright, jay and reader both have a mild superiority complex, reader is kind of a jerk, and last but not the least, a fluffy kiss ♡
summary: so jay got piss drunk at jungwon’s party, lost his balance, tripped, and fell off the second floor balcony. now, he’s got a broken leg, a plummeting social status and a doctor’s note that orders him to abstain from all upcoming football matches till his bones mend. too bad he doesn’t possess the power to superheal and won’t be able to play when a recruiter from the college of his dreams comes to watch. left with nothing but regret, broken dreams and a shitty gpa (because why would he study when his coach told him he was guaranteed a sponsored ride to indiana university), he’s forced to bury his nose in textbooks and finally learn what the fuck integrals are. it’s a good thing the school was considerate (and sympathetic) enough to assign him the best tutor on the entire campus—you. the small hiccup in this arrangement? you hate jocks, but jay thinks you look cute.
based on: axl and cassidy’s story from the american sitcom called “the middle.”
note: i’m posting this so impulsively LMFAOO i just realised i haven’t put out any fics for a while now so i thought why let this catch dust when i could repost ?? i hope you guys like this oneshot! feedback is always appreciated ^_^
masterlist
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Jay’s legs were killing him.
First, he’d been hobbling through the crowded school hallway and bumping into people every ten seconds. Then, he realised he had forgotten to lock his locker, so he had to backtrack to do it. Then, he realised the school elevator was out of order, so he had to jump on one foot while carrying his backpack and crutches in the same hand as he limped down two floors. And right now, he was standing in what seemed to be an impossibly long line, waiting for his tutoring schedule to be handed to him.  
He probably should have asked for help, but the remainder of his pride had gotten in the way and prevented him from doing just that. He’d already lost his scholarship because of his stupidity; he could not bear to lose his last shred of dignity.
To say what happened at Jungwon’s house had been tragic would be an understatement. 
Being the designated driver, Jay wasn’t even supposed to drink during the party that night, but he had taken one look at the table lined with booze, and every rational thought had flown right out the window. Not even half an hour later, he was stumbling upstairs in search of a toilet to relieve his alcohol-filled bladder. 
Too bad he opened the wrong door and was tipsy enough to have hallucinated an entire fucking toilet in what was actually a balcony. Feeling a migraine approaching, Jay decided to sit on the toilet seat to clear his head first. 
The toilet seat being the thin, metal railing that people usually installed so they didn’t fall off the balcony, of course. Clearly, it didn’t work in Jay’s case because he fell off the moment he tried to sit on it. 
The fact that there was no one to witness his accident had been a small act of mercy on God’s part. When people rushed to the backyard to see what had caused the loud thud, Jay twisted the story and omitted certain parts to save himself from the embarrassment. 
“I was drunk and searching for a place to clear my head. The balcony seemed like a good option, but I didn’t realise how much I had and tripped." 
An hour later, he was lying on a bed in the nearest hospital, his leg wrapped up in a cast. His parents were sitting beside him, unspeaking. They didn’t yell at him for getting drunk and being so reckless—not after hearing Dr. Choi, his assigned orthopaedist, say that Jay was lucky to even be alive. She said that considering the way he fell, they should be thankful he suffered a blow to his leg rather than his head. 
Jay, however, wasn’t feeling particularly thankful and didn’t think he had lucked out. 
“What do you mean I can’t play?” he demanded immediately, repeating what Dr. Choi said to him not even moments ago. His chest heaved and a feeling of breathlessness washed over him as he realised what her words meant. 
“My entire future depends on that football match! A recruiter’s coming to watch the championship and I have to play. It’s my only shot at going to college!” 
Tears of regret and anger towards himself began filling his eyes. Jay felt a headache approaching—not from the hangover but from the sudden, devastating information he was processing in his already weakened state. His mother put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly in an attempt to offer comfort and calm him down.
It did little of either.
“I’m sorry, Jay,” Dr. Choi said, offering him a sympathetic frown. “Your leg won’t mend in a month. The minimum requirement is six weeks.”
“Are two weeks really going to make that much of a difference?” he asked, desperation evident in his tone. Jay knew he was grasping at straws and trying to have hope when there likely wasn’t any. “I’ll take care of my leg and make sure not to put too much stress on it—”
“Let’s say you do play,” Dr. Choi interrupted him. “Let’s say you somehow luck out and perform better than the other players, who, mind you, aren’t physically disabled like you are.” 
She had resorted to taunting him to prove her point. Every word was like a slap to his face, shoving him deeper and deeper into the abyss of helplessness. 
“Let’s say you get the scholarship. Guess what, Jay, you won’t be able to maintain it because your leg will be too damaged by then to keep playing. You won’t ever be able to play football again, and unless you want to give up your passion and leg for some scholarship you won’t be able to keep, I suggest you listen to me. There are other ways to get into a college, but there’s no way to fix a limb ruined beyond repair.”
The conversation ended there. His parents refused to talk about the scholarship again, claiming that Dr. Choi was right. Deep down, Jay knew she was right too. But a part of him was still in denial, not wanting to accept the sharp turn his life had taken. 
How had he gone from being the it boy of the school to someone everyone had started to pity and resent? 
Jay supposed the students did earn a right to resent him. Especially because he was going to lead the school to victory in the football championship, but now could not due to his broken leg. 
But he did not think they had the right to pity him. He was suffering from the consequences of his actions and was learning from his mistakes. According to him, that was all that mattered, and any outsiders had no right to poke their nose into his business to offer unwanted sympathy. 
Adjusting the grip on his crutches, Jay glanced at the queue in front of him. Five more students before his chance would arrive. Sighing, he shrugged his backpack off his shoulder and placed it on the ground. 
He walked over to the waiting seats a few feet away and collapsed on one of them, letting out a barely restrained moan as his legs finally found relief. 
Just as he made himself comfortable in the chair, someone walked into the front office, glanced at his backpack for a moment and kicked it out of the way.
Jay started. “Hey! Put my backpack where it was. It’s holding my place.” 
“Sorry,” you dryly replied. “There’s no holding places.”
Jay clenched his jaw and bit the inside of his cheek. He didn’t want to play the injured man card and be hypocritical by taking advantage of your sympathy, but his patience was wearing very thin. “Look, I don’t know if you’re blind or something, but I’m very wounded.”
You snorted, taking a few steps forward as the line moved. “No, you’re not. You’re just lazy. I saw you sliding down the staircase a few minutes back.”
He scoffed, unable to believe your ignorance. “Yeah, that’s because I’ve got crutches and it was practically impossible to walk down!“
All you did was roll your eyes. 
“Are you saying I’m faking?” Jay questioned, his voice dropping an octave. “This is real.” He pointed at the cast enveloping his leg. “I might be out for the rest of the football season and everyone’s freaking the fuck out!”
You feigned a gasp. “Oh, yeah, me too.” Then deadpanned. “I’m just hiding it behind not caring at all.”
Jay stumbled for words. He’d never met someone who didn’t care for football. Sure, he could understand not caring for cross country, but football—only the greatest sport ever? That seemed very unlikely. “Well, I probably don’t care for whatever it is you do either. So…” He shrugged and trailed off, realising he didn’t have a solid comeback. 
You didn’t seem to notice, since your eyes lit up imperceptibly. “Actually, I’m co-founder of the literature club, photographer of the school newspaper, and—”
“Park Jongseong?” 
You were cut off as the lady behind the desk called Jay. He averted his eyes from your face and craned his neck to see past your figure that was obstructing her. 
“Your assigned tutor is Y/N.” Your eyebrows almost disappeared into your hairline at the words. Jay glared at you, eyes narrowing when he realised you were the said tutor. 
“Oh, great.” The receptionist beamed when she noticed that the two of you had been conversing with each other. “I see the two of you have already started to get to know one another.” She went back to her work, paying no heed to your surprise and the way Jay looked like he’d been betrayed by a trusted companion. 
You gave him a saccharine smile and continued, “Oh, and in my spare time, I tutor dumb jocks.”
Jay rolled his eyes. Grumbling in misfortune, he gripped the hand you had offered and pulled himself to his feet. Or foot, in this unfortunate case. 
“Shall we?” you piped up. “Gotta make sure you go to college next year.” 
Not for the first time in the past week, Jay cursed himself for breaking his leg.
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“Wow.” You frowned as your eyes took in Jay’s scores from all his previous tests that year. “How’d you manage to stay on the team with these grades, backpack boy? Don’t they kick you if you don’t manage to do well in your studies?”
The two of you had begun your tutoring sessions right after your encounter in the school’s front office. Your little conversation gave you the feeling that Jay was probably going to need a bit more guidance than your other tutees.
As always, you were right. But now that you were seeing all the C and D grades printed in front of almost every subject except P.E (it had an A grade, to no one’s surprise), you were wishing you weren’t. 
At that moment, you were seated in a private study room located in the library. Jay, who was lounging in a chair on the other side of the table, shrugged. “As long as I didn’t fail, it didn’t really matter.”
You scoffed under your breath and closed his file shut. While you were busy pulling all-nighters to get good grades, he was partying and bashing his head into other people’s heads. Glancing up at him, you announced, “Let’s start then.”
“Wait.”
You cocked your head to the side. 
Clearing his throat, Jay sat up straighter and began, “Before we dive in, I wanna be clear about my goals here.” He pointed at the stack of books you had kept on the table and made a sour face. “I don’t want to get too smart—just smart enough to get into college. So, like, I think you should design my schedule or whatever that way. I don’t really wanna study for hours on end like those nerds sitting in the main library.”
You raised an eyebrow and slowly nodded, letting your unbound hair fall over your face to keep your smile from showing. God, he was so stupid it was almost cute. You wanted to lean over, pinch his cheeks and tell him that no, he wouldn’t be able to get into a good university even if he started studying now. 
Gathering yourself, you gestured towards his file and said, “I think we’re safe there.”
Jay’s eye twitched as if he was trying to figure out whether you were insulting him. You smiled sweetly and batted your eyes. 
His nostrils flared in anger. “Look, I don’t know why you hate me—”
“I don’t hate you.” You laughed and waved him away. “Gee, I don’t even know you. What I hate is the concept of putting sports over academics. You really think we’ve come so far because some guy could throw a ball in a hoop?”
“We came so far because said guy exercised regularly and kept himself in shape. The said guy could’ve died before inventing whatever shit he did if he weren’t exercising regularly and had heart problems,” Jay snapped. 
“Interesting theory,” you mused, condescension dripping from each word. “Unfortunately, that’s not what I meant. I never said to not exercise and practice sports; all I said was to not give sports a higher priority than academics.”
You pulled your stack of books towards yourself and opened one, ready to start the session. You were pretty sure you had ended the topic right there. But Jay, apparently, had other plans. “I don’t think you realise what a public service we do for the school,” he began, making you pause and look up at him. “We’re, like, totally responsible for all the caring and the trophies and the coolness and stuff.”
“Oh, my God,” you said with a bored face and a flat tone. “All the coolness and stuff is you? Thanks so much. Feels really great knowing the school directs all its funds to the coolness and stuff rather than things that actually matter.” 
Jay let out a long sigh, realising you had deep-rooted prejudices and there was no changing your mind. “You ever had fun, Y/N?” he asked instead.
“Oh, I’ll have fun at college next year,” you said matter-of-factly. “Something you don’t have a prayer of getting into unless you open your goddamn calculus book!”
With a roll of his eyes, Jay did what he was told. As he turned to the page you had asked him to open, he attempted to make conversation once more, which, in hindsight, was a bad idea because he made a fool out of himself again.
“So, what, are you accepted into Harvard or something?” he inquired without looking at you, his attention on the contents of the page he had flipped to. His tone very much suggested that he didn’t think you were smart enough to get into the Ivy League college.
“Vassar, actually,” you provided. “I want to pursue the liberal arts.”
He snorted. You tilted your head to the side and raised an eyebrow, trying your best to put a leash on the anger bubbling inside you. Your parents already gave you enough shit for choosing to pursue your passion for painting; you didn’t want a man-child laughing at you for the same reason.
“Vassar,” Jay repeated as if that were enough explanation. When the expression on your face didn’t change, he added, “It has ass in it.”
You leaned back in your seat and snorted, partly in disbelief and partly in amusement. “Wow, I feel sorry for you. Your whole identity is this tiny locker room world where you think you’re the king, and now that you’re injured and scared, you’re putting up an imperious facade and overcompensating for your insecurities.”
Jay’s smile dropped and his lips pressed into a thin line at your words. Guilt blossomed within you at the sight, and your eyes softened. You shouldn’t have said that—you had no right to, considering you didn’t know what he was going through. He was a teenager with broken dreams and you had very likely stomped on whatever remained—
“Okay,” he finally spoke up, eyes daring not to meet yours. You saw a small blush tinting his cheeks pink as he continued, “If you’re trying to insult me, you’re gonna have to use smaller words. I’d like to confirm if your accusations are true or not.” 
The tension dissipated, and a small chuckle escaped your lips. “Okay, backpack boy. Let’s start with literature instead of calculus, and hopefully, by the end of the session, you’ll be able to confirm what I said.”
Jay smiled despite knowing it was him you were laughing at. He didn’t mind, though. Not when you looked so pretty and your eyes shined so brightly when your lips tugged upwards. As fake and cliché as it sounded, he had never seen someone with a smile as beautiful as yours. 
As the session moved forward and you laughed at every single joke he cracked, he realised he liked being the reason behind your happiness. 
He liked it very much.
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You decided you had to be out of your mind to be enjoying Jay’s company.
You didn’t like how it was so easy to converse with him despite your huge difference of opinions on certain things. You didn’t like how he was so effortlessly charismatic and hilarious—though you suspected it was more of a coping mechanism these days. You didn’t like how he brought a smile to your face every time he passed some ironically narcissistic comment. You didn’t like how you had just spent two hours with him every day for the past two weeks, and your entire opinion of him was changing.
You didn’t like how you were starting to… like him. As a person, of course. 
Don’t get me wrong—you still found him annoying and the two of you still bickered over the smallest, most insignificant things, but each exchanged retort came with an underlying film of adoration. 
The thought of being anything more than an acquaintance with an athlete would have been unimaginable before, but now you found yourself wanting to be friends with Jay. 
Just not at that moment. All you wanted to do then was smash your six hundred page hard-cover history textbook right into his skull. 
“So,” you sighed and massaged the bridge of your nose. Your eyes scanned the notes and books messily splayed on the table before rising to meet his. “Your score of zero out of twenty on the mock test I prepared for you makes it pretty clear that you read nothing about the Bay of Pigs invasion.”
Leaning back in your seat, you threw his answer paper at him. Jay blinked heavily, unable to believe he had failed. 
You raised an eyebrow and asked, “May I know why?”
He didn’t look at you for an entire moment, poking the inside of his cheek with his tongue as his eyes roved over the red crosses on the entirety of the paper. 
“Okay, but in my defence,” he finally began, an I-know-I-fucked-up-but-listen-to-my-absolutely-unreasonable-excuse-and-please-forgive-me expression adorning his face. “I totally sat down to read this when the guys called me and invited me down to the lake.”
You raised an eyebrow and leaned forward, propping your chin on your palm. “Oh, did they, now?”
“Yeah!” he exclaimed, not picking up on your sarcasm. “Everyone was there! And P.S. awesome ensued—why didn’t you go?”
Jay looked kind of disappointed by the fact that you hadn’t come, but it might’ve just been your eyes playing tricks on you. You hadn’t slept at all the previous night.
You groaned. “See, this is why I hate high school. All everyone does is go to lame parties. And for your information,” you added, “I was studying all night. And so should you! You have a test tomorrow and you’re nowhere near prepared.”
“Well, the teacher said yesterday that it was the day after tomorrow. So I still have more time. Hah, suck it, party pooper!”
He ended with a smug smile and a jab of his finger in your direction. You stared at him in disbelief, wanting to laugh at him but being unable to bring yourself to. Instead, you took the route of self-pity and wondered what wrong you had done in your previous life to have been assigned such a stupid tutee. 
“Wow,” you dragged the word, your tone flat. Your eyes still on him, you lightly shook your head. “God does not give with both hands.”
Jay scrunched his eyebrows. “And that means what?”
You suppressed a smile. “It means that attractive people are usually not that bright.”
Instead of being offended as you had expected, Jay looked rather smug. “So you think I’m attractive.”
Oh. 
You stilled, the smile on your face dropping immediately. Maybe God hadn’t given you with either hand. You dug your own grave this time, the shovel being the fact that you had underestimated the cunning of the boy sitting in front of you. In an attempt to claw your way back up, you scrambled for words. 
Clearing your throat and averting your eyes, you mumbled, “That’s not what I meant.”
“Sure,” Jay drawled and picked up his pen, toying with it. You could practically hear him smirking.
Cursing yourself mentally, you dropped your gaze to the history textbook in front of you. “Okay, um, so where were we? Right, the Bay of Pigs invasion.” Mustering the courage to look at him again, you began explaining, “It’s important because it was a very crucial moment in history.”
Jay raised his eyebrows, pressing his lips in a thin line as he tried to wipe the goofy smile off his face. He nodded his head, trying to look like he was paying attention to what you were saying, but in reality, all he could think about was your slip-up and how adorable you looked when you were all flustered and embarrassed. 
“I mean,” you continued, trying to act like everything was normal, “those three days were fraught with tension and confusion. JFK had only been an officer for a couple of months, and he barely knew what he was doing, yet he knew he had to take bold action—”
Your string of informative words was cut off when Jay put his hands on the table between the two of you and lunged towards you, pressing his lips firmly against yours. 
You froze.
Your eyes widened, and your breath hitched in your throat, but he detached his mouth from yours before you could give any other reaction. 
Plopping back down on his chair, Jay clicked his tongue and grinned. “Bold enough?”
Coming back to your senses, you took a deep breath and scoffed. “Seriously? Oh, my God, I have to go.” 
Gathering your books in your arms, you got up from your seat and hurried towards the study room’s door. Jay started, wanting to follow you out, but his crutches were resting against the wall and were out of his reach.
“I-I’m sorry,” he sputtered. “But you were giving me all these signals and saying how I was attractive, and I just thought that—”
The door slammed in his face, cutting him off. Jay ran his hand through his hair and tugged at the strands roughly, cursing himself for being so fucking stupid. 
Outside, you leaned against the door you had just closed and clutched your books to your chest. Breathlessness washed over you, but so did another emotion. 
Giddiness.
You brought your fingers to your lips and smiled, but forced it away almost instantly.
This wasn’t right. You weren’t supposed to enjoy the kiss, brief as it was. You weren’t supposed to be thinking about Jay. You weren’t supposed to regret walking away from him. You weren’t supposed to imagine what would have happened if you had kissed him back. 
You had a boyfriend, and your heart wasn’t supposed to flutter for anyone except him. 
But then, why did it soar for Jay?
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Jay was a mess. 
All he could think about was you and how thoroughly he had fucked up. Honestly, what was he thinking? A girl like you would never like a guy like him. You had a bright future to look forward to, whereas Jay didn’t even know if he was going to be able to make it past high school. 
“Hey.” A voice rumbled above him and a hand smacked the back of his head. “Focus.”
Jay groaned and sat up straight, his father’s impatient face infiltrating his line of vision immediately. “What will you use here? An integral or a derivative?”
Averting his gaze to the math book open on the dining table, Jay stared at it with heavy eyes. He understood nothing. All he could see was a blur of words and graphs. It was well past three in the morning, and he wanted to do nothing more than sleep.
“I don’t know,” Jay muttered. “I don’t know what to use. I don’t know why I’m such an idiot. I don’t know why I kissed her, and I don’t know if she hates me or not. She probably does.” He laughed pathetically and dropped his head on the table again. “I want to talk to her, and I want to beg for her forgiveness, but I don’t think she wants to even look at me anymore. I don’t want to look at me anymore,” he whispered, glancing at his cast covered leg. 
“Hey, kid!” his father snapped and grabbed Jay by his collar, making him sit up again. “This isn’t the time to have girl problems and wallow in self-pity. You’ve got a math test in two days. One that makes up thirty per cent of your grade, and you need to do well in it. I don’t want to see anything lower than a B minus, understood?” 
Jay nodded numbly, not really registering what his father was saying. “Good. Now, tell me what you’ll use here. Integral or derivative?” 
“Integral,” Jay guessed. 
“Nice. Go ahead and solve the equation now.”
“I’m tired,” Jay said weakly. “Can we continue this tomorrow night? Or tonight,” he corrected himself when he realised that the weekend was over and it was Monday already. “Whatever.”
Sighing, Jay’s father massaged the bridge of his nose. “But I don’t have time. I have an early morning meeting on Tuesday. Ask your tutor to extend your session and complete this chapter today.”
Jay snorted.
His dad raised an eyebrow. “Really? Your tutor is the girl you’re having problems with?” 
“Don’t rub it in,” Jay grumbled.
Rolling his eyes, his father got up from the chair and began making his way out of the kitchen. “I don’t care if it’s your fault—”
“It is.”
“—just apologise and make things right. She’s your only shot at college and you can’t afford to let her go. Am I being clear?”
“Yeah,” Jay mumbled, sleep already beginning to consume him. “Crystal.” 
His eyes fell shut, and darkness enveloped him. 
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For someone who wanted to desperately beg for your forgiveness not twelve hours ago, Jay was filled with tremendous hesitation as he stood outside the study room. 
Three times he had placed his hand on the door, and three times he had withdrawn it. 
He knew it was going to be awkward. Of course, it would be awkward. He had kissed you, and you hadn’t kissed him back. You had practically run away from him, for God’s sake! 
There was no way you could have hated the kiss. Jay had kissed his fair share of girls in the school, and not one of them had ever had any complaint. 
Just because she didn’t hate the kiss doesn’t mean she didn’t hate the guy who gave it to her, a voice inside him popped. 
Jay silenced it immediately and steeled his nerves. He gripped the knob once again, twisting it this time and pushing the door open. 
You were hunched over a storybook, smiling at what was written inside the inked publication. 
You looked up when one of Jay’s crutches got caught in the door and made a clanging sound. Shooting up from your seat, you held the door wide open for him and let him inside. 
Jay cleared his throat once you closed it and croaked, “Hey.”
“Hey,” you whispered, looking at him with pursed lips. 
A beat of silence passed. The two of you awkwardly stared at each other, not really attempting to say anything. 
You didn’t have anything to say, but you could tell Jay did. So you waited for him patiently. 
“I know I’m the last person you want to see right now,” Jay began, not really meeting your eyes. “But I just wanted you to know I got a B on that government test.”
Despite yourself, you smiled. With teeth and everything. “Really? That’s amazing! Good job, Jay. I’m so proud of you.”
Before the compliment could sink in and his heart could swell with happiness, he continued, “Yeah. And I know that things are really awkward between us right now because of that… kiss thing.” He took a deep breath. “So I get it if you don’t want to tutor me anymore.”
Jay knew this wasn’t what his dad expected him to do. What he was doing was stupid; he should be begging you to continue to tutor him. Because that was the smart thing to do. 
But he didn’t think it was the right thing to do. He clearly made you uncomfortable that day, and he didn’t want to bother you any more than he already had. 
“It was lame of me,” he added, interrupting you before you could even speak. “You hated it. Sorry. And stuff.” Jay shook his head, realising that while he had been desperate to apologise, he hadn’t really thought of what he would say. 
He moved towards the door and pulled it open again. Smiling nervously, he said, “So, just to recap: Me? Lame. Bye.”
He was almost out of the room when you put your palm on the door and slammed it shut, blurting, “I didn’t hate the kiss.”
Looking taken aback and extremely surprised, he asked, “You didn’t?”
You fiddled with your fingers, not really able to look at him. “I didn’t,” you confirmed. “Actually, it was nice. You’re a good kisser.”
You should have shut up and not said anything about liking the kiss. But you didn’t want your friendship to end even before it began. He kissed you, but so what? He didn’t know you had a boyfriend. Heck, for that little moment when his lips were on yours, you’d forgotten you had one too. 
You didn’t want Jay to walk away from you. You knew it was completely plausible that he would never return once he was outside the room. Confessing to liking the kiss even though your lips had touched for barely a few seconds was the only way you could think of to stop him so he could hear you out. 
“But I have a boyfriend. He’s away at college, so it’s moot.”
Were you a complete jerk for giving Jay hope and then stomping on it immediately after? Yes. Did you hate yourself? Absolutely. 
“Oh,” he said in a tiny voice. The small smile that had begun creeping on his face when you had admitted to liking the kiss was long gone. Disappointment was evident on his face. 
But so was acceptance. 
Your heart clenched for him. Jay had had to accept so many things in the past few weeks. He had to accept the fact that he would never attend his dream college. He had to accept the fact that victory had been in his grasp, but had still been taken away at the last possible moment. 
He had to accept that he would never be able to play in the football championship and win the scholarship. And now, he had to accept the fact that you would never be his. 
Clearing his throat, Jay gave you his widest, fakest smile. “Cool. Cool. Yeah, it’s cool. It’s alright.”
Yanking the door open once more, he fumbled, “Yeah, uh, if you ever break up with the moot guy, let me know.”
Passing another forced smile your way, he left. 
In your attempt to stop him from leaving by talking about the kiss, you realised you had only made things worse. 
You had broken his heart.  
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“Why are you drinking milk again?” Jay’s mom asked him exasperatedly. Said boy was sprawled on the couch, looking up at the ceiling with blank eyes. 
Taking a swig from the five-litre milk carton, Jay provided, “You see, I wanted to drown my sorrows in alcohol, but then I realised that’s what caused my injury and ruined my future, so I decided to drink my second favourite liquid—milk.”
Snatching the carton from her son’s hand, Jay’s mother complained, “I just bought this! How’d you drink all of it within ten minutes?”
“My sorrows are too many, mother,” he sulked. “It took a lot of milk to drown them. Don’t blame me; blame the person who caused them.”
“What—”
His mom’s reply was cut off by the shrill ringing of the doorbell reverberating through the house. Sighing, Jay’s mother walked to the door and pulled it open. 
“Hey, Jay,” she called after a few seconds. “There’s a Y/N here to see you!”
Jay was up on his feet instantly, both his crutches under his armpits. “I’m coming!”
Why were you here? Had you broken up with the moot guy? Were you going to—
“Hey.” You waved, awkwardly smiling at Jay and his mother. “You’ve got a math test tomorrow and I thought we could study at your place instead of the school library. Because of, you know, what happened.”
Oh. 
You were here to help him study. You were here to do your fucking job and Jay couldn’t believe he was naïve enough to think you’d break up with your boyfriend and show up at his house not half an hour after the shit that had gone down in the study room.
“What happened?” his mother asked, concerned. 
“Nothing,” Jay replied hastily, gently pushing her out of the way to make way for you to come inside. “Just some… pest control. We’ll be in my room.”
He tugged you along before his mom could ask any more questions, moving surprisingly fast for someone with a broken leg. 
“I’m sorry for showing up like this,” you apologised once you were inside his room. “It’s just—tomorrow’s test is really important and it’s my responsibility to make sure you do well in it.” 
Jay nodded, sitting down on his bed and gesturing for you to take a seat too. “Yeah, no, I get it. Academics over feelings. Always. Yeah.”
You opened your mouth again, searching for the right words to say. “Look, I know that this is really awkward, but I’m still your tutor and you’re still my tutee. It’s still my job to make sure you get into college and… if possible, can we forget about everything that happened?” 
Jay nodded once again, somewhat numbly this time. “Yeah, you’re right. I can move on,” he forced a laugh, shrugging. “I mean, it’s been, what, eighteen days since we met? Yeah, it should be easy. I’ll probably just get a rebound or something. You’d be surprised to know how many girls want to date the star quarterback of their school’s football team. No worries, yeah. None at all.”
You gave him a small smile and pulled your study material out of your tote bag. “That’s good to hear.” Sticking out your hand, you asked, “So, friends?”
Jay stared at it for a moment, then brought his gaze up to meet yours. Slipping his hand into yours, he echoed, “Friends.”
Neither of you believed the pact you had just made.
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Four days had passed since you had shown up at Jay’s house, and so far, things were going smoothly. 
Things weren’t really awkward between the two of you anymore. You were able to talk to each other like good friends and casually hang out outside of your sessions. It was mostly playing video games at either of your houses since Jay couldn’t really partake in any physical activities. 
Both of you had mutually decided that going to the movies together was not a good idea after everything that had happened. 
Jay hadn’t found a rebound. Granted, it had only been four days, but the thought of him not being able to find one was oddly reassuring. 
You were being extremely unfair, you knew, but you were a mess. You didn’t know what you were feeling. You didn’t know what you wanted to feel. You had never been very good at matters concerning the heart anyway. 
At that moment, the two of you were seated in your usual study room, your session in progress. 
“Okay, the most important thing you’re gonna want to study for your test is the—” you brought the tip of your pen to his notebook and wrote— “the legislative branch.”
“Wow.” Jay snorted. “Your handwriting is terrible.”
You rolled your eyes. “Yeah, well, I can’t be good at everything. I’m not a robot.”
“My handwriting is really awesome.” He grinned. “Here, let me show you.”
Instead of taking the pen from you, he put his hand on the back of yours. You stilled, relaxing only when you were sure there was no ulterior motive behind him touching you. 
“Jay,” you read as he made your hand write with his. “Is. Brilliant.”
He looked up at you once he was done and wiggled his eyebrows. “Pretty impressive, huh?”
Smirking, you pointed out, “It would be even more impressive if you spelt ‘brilliant’ with two ‘l’s.”
Jay frowned, staring at what he had written with a tinge of disappointment. You laughed, trying not to focus on how cute he looked when he was pouting. 
You only realised your hand was still in his when your phone rang. Eyes widening, you snatched it away as subtly as you could. Your guilt only increased when you read the caller ID flashing on your screen. 
“Oh, it’s my boyfriend calling from Northeastern,” you told him. “I should take this.”
“Yeah, sure,” Jay said quickly, gathering his stuff and shoving it inside his backpack. “No problem. I gotta go see the foot doctor anyway. I will see you tomorrow, yeah?”
“Yeah.” You nodded and gave him a tight-lipped smile, bidding goodbye. “Tomorrow.”   
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Jay was so ridiculously euphoric he could have shoved his own face down a toilet bowl if someone asked him to. 
Yesterday, without a doubt, qualified as one of the best days in his entire life.
After all, his leg had healed two weeks early and Dr. Choi had cleared him to play in the football championship the upcoming Friday. Turns out, his unhealthy addiction to drinking milk had been useful in speeding up the mending process. 
Not for a moment had he sat down once the cast was removed. The pain in his leg, once so excruciating, was now completely gone. Jay had spent the remainder of the previous day playing basketball in his driveway along with his dad.
He even let himself fall to the gravelly road a few times, wanting to feel as much as he could in his previously casted leg. 
At that moment, he was making his way to the library, wanting to give you the good news in person. It had taken every ounce of effort on his part to not call you the moment he left the hospital. 
He didn’t just want to tell you that he was healed. He wanted to show you.
“Jay, my man!” someone hooted just as he was about to enter the library. Before he could turn his head to see who had called him, Jay was tackled to the ground. “You’re back!”
“Of course, I’m back!” He grinned, shoving Sunghoon—one of the players in his team—off of him. “A broken leg could have never kept me from participating in the game.”
Never mind the fact that Jay had spent the past few weeks thinking the exact opposite. It didn’t matter now. He was going to play.
“So I’ll see you at practice after school?” Sunghoon asked, pulling Jay to his feet and engulfing him in a brotherly hug. 
“Yes, you will.” Jay laughed, slapping his friend on the back and moving away. “You most definitely will.” 
After a few more exchanged words and a promise to obliterate each other in practice, Jay began making his way to your study room again. The two of you didn’t really talk in school since your social circles were vastly different, but Jay knew where you were at every hour.
Not in a creepy way, of course. You’d given him your schedule so that he could come and clear any doubts he may have outside of your session. 
Turning the doorknob, Jay kicked his way into the room. You jolted in your seat, momentarily surprised. He didn’t wait for you to regain your senses, though.
Raising his leg, he slammed it on the study table in front of you and yelled, “I’m cured! Jay has risen!” Then, scrunching his eyebrows, he backtracked, “Riseth? Riseneth? Doesn’t matter! I’m playing the fucking game on Friday! My foot healed two weeks early. Look!” 
You opened your mouth to speak, but he beat you to it. “Go ahead and stomp on it! I don’t care. Trust me, I’m fine. Heck, I’m fucking awesome!”
You waited for a moment, replying when you were sure he wouldn’t interrupt you again. “That’s great, Jay. I’m happy for you. But can we talk about this later? Riki, here, has a test on World War 2 tomorrow.”
It was only when you pointed at the boy sitting beside you did Jay notice you were not alone. Widening his smile, he said, “Yeah, well, guess what Riki—America won the fucking World War. And you know who else is going to win on Friday night? Us, when we kick Willow Creek’s butt!”
“Wait,” you stopped him, your forehead creasing. “You’re actually going to play on Friday night? You really think that’s a good idea?” 
“Yeah,” he replied, giving you a look that indicated he thought you were out of your mind. “I think it’s a great idea. And it’s not just a game, it’s the fucking championship. Oh, and that reminds me, I’m going to have to leave our sessions early for practice, but that’s—” he waved his hand dismissively— “whatever.”
You pursed your lips, nodding curtly. “Great. You’re gonna skip studying so you go and bash your head into other guys’ heads. Sounds like a super solid plan.” 
Jay was wrong when he thought nothing could dull his spirits that day. Every sarcastic word leaving your mouth was like an arrow to his heart. 
“You know what,” you continued. “Why don’t we skip our sessions altogether?” 
“Wow,” Jay scoffed, trying to keep the hurt from showing on his face. “You know what you should tutor people in? How to ruin the world’s greatest moment, because you’re really good at it.” 
You threw your hands in the air. “Yeah, well, I don’t know what to tell you, Jay. I’m sorry this didn’t play out the way you wanted.” 
Gritting his teeth at your dismissive attitude and the nonchalance in your tone, he growled, “Let me tell you something—this is not a normal response to awesome news. But you know what is?”
Without waiting for your reply, he yanked the door open and yelled into the library outside, “Hey, guys, guess what? I’m playing in the championship on Friday!” 
Hoots and cheers fell on your ears, followed by the threats and demands for silence bellowed by the librarian. Slamming the door shut again, he looked you right in the eye. “That is.” 
You rolled your eyes and sighed. “Fine. I’m sorry I didn’t react the way they did. Are we done now? Just because you’ve given up on studying doesn’t mean Riki has.” 
Jay’s temper flared. Locking his jaw and tightening his grip on the straps of his backpack, he left wordlessly. 
He didn’t need to listen to any of your shit. It didn’t matter what you thought. The championship meant a lot to him and he was going to play in it. 
Period.
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You realised you had royally fucked up. 
Yes, you did think it was a bad idea for Jay to play in the championship so soon after his cast had been removed, and yes, you did think he should have focused more on studying. 
But the thing is, it wasn’t your place to think. 
You were nothing more than just a friend, and it didn’t matter what you thought. It was his life, not yours. You should have been a supportive person and hyped him up, but like an idiot, you let your prejudice against sports get the better of you. 
Besides, if Jay was convinced that participating was the best course of action for him, your opinion was as good as the dirt under his shoes.
In your session later that day, you were going to inform him that you had talked to the counsellor about his college application. She had said that Jay had improved tremendously and that he might be able to get into college on his academic merit. 
But it didn’t matter anymore, did it? 
Maybe you were selfish. You didn’t want all your efforts to go down the drain like that. His getting into college only on his academic merit would have been a victory for you too.
And if anything, you were a sore loser. 
When Jay talked about needing to leave your sessions earlier for football practice, something in you had snapped.
Partly because you were upset he had given up on academics the first chance he got, and partly because you realised you wouldn’t get to spend a lot of time with him anymore. 
You had come to enjoy his company. A day without hearing him pass a narcissistic comment was not a day completed. You had grown attached and you feared that this new development would put your friendship in jeopardy. 
Yeah, you were most definitely a selfish jerk. 
You had always been insecure and unsure of your feelings. Even when your boyfriend had left for college a few months ago, you had wanted to break up with him. You weren’t sure you could survive being in a long-distance relationship. He had reassured you, said that the two of you could make it work, but you hadn’t really believed him. 
Every day, you waited for something to go wrong. Every day, you waited for him to call you and tell you he couldn’t do it anymore. That there was someone else, that college life was catching up to him and he didn’t have the energy to make time for someone he couldn’t even hold. 
None of those things ever happened. 
It was when you began getting closer to Jay that the thoughts of breaking up with your boyfriend started to intensify. Video calls and messaging weren’t enough. Meeting up once a month wasn’t enough. You needed someone to be there for you, to hug you and wipe your tears when you were feeling sad. 
You wanted Jay to be that someone. Never mind the fact that what you had done, the way you had hurt him when you were blinded by your own insecurities and rage… was unforgivable. 
Jay had kissed you, but that didn’t mean he liked you. He had asked you to tell him if you ever broke up with your boyfriend, but that didn’t mean he had confessed. He had never said anything that indicated he wanted to date you.
Yes, his actions made it seem like he wanted you, but you knew his reputation. He was quite the ladies’ man. 
At this point, it didn’t even matter. Whether he liked you or not, you liked him. You weren’t going to confess to Jay; that ship had already sailed, but your decision was made. You were going to break up with your boyfriend. 
It would be unfair to him if you didn’t.
You toyed with your phone, contemplating whether you should call him or not. Would it be cowardly to break up on call? You knew it would be quick and that you wouldn’t have to deal with the aftermath. 
No, you decided. You weren’t going to be a jerk again. Just because your feelings were all over the place, it didn’t give you a pass to be an asshole. 
He was coming over on Friday to celebrate Thanksgiving with your family, so you would break up with him then. Once everyone was done with dinner and he was getting ready to leave. 
The day after, you would apologise to Jay. You wanted to give him space and allow him to clear his head. Frankly, you needed some space too. Plus, you didn’t want to go in with the intention of making things right, and then have the situation escalate out of hand. 
He had a game he needed to win and a scholarship he needed to bag. You didn’t want to burden him and stress him out any more than you already had. 
You took a deep breath, reciting your plan in your head: breakup with your boyfriend on Friday, and apologise to Jay the next day. 
For the first time in a long time, you weren’t unsure of what you were about to do.
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Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry—
“What’s wrong?”
Fuck.
Jay brought his palms to his face, rubbing the area under his eyes hastily. He hadn’t gone to practice once school had ended, choosing to go home instead. He didn’t want his teammates to see what a mess their captain was. Right before he was about to enter his house, he realised he couldn’t face his mom, so he decided to sit on the stairs that led to the porch. 
Jay hadn’t realised his father would be back from work early that day. 
“Nothing,” he said thickly, trying to get rid of the fogginess in his eyes. “Everything’s fine.”
His father’s eyes softened. He sat down beside his son, placing his briefcase on his lap. “Girl trouble again?” 
Jay mentally groaned. He didn’t want to talk to his dad about you. So, he decided to talk about his other problem, just so he could get him off his back. 
“I don’t feel like playing in the championship on Friday.” 
Silence. 
“Remind me if I’m wrong,” his father began slowly, “but didn’t you ask Dr. Choi if you could kiss her on the mouth when she gave you clearance to play yesterday?” 
Jay’s cheeks heated up. “Yeah, well, I was really excited!” he defended himself. “But then.” He sighed heavily. “I started thinking about how well this entire studying thing is working out for me. Maybe I should just stick to that, you know?” 
“Studying?” Jay’s dad inquired, sounding extremely surprised. “Okay, I think I know what’s going on here.” Looking up at his father, Jay raised an eyebrow. 
“You’re nervous!” his dad exclaimed like it was the most obvious explanation. “You haven’t played for a while now and there’s a lot riding on this game. I get that, Jay. But sometimes, you just gotta lay it all out there and go for it.”
“I- I don’t know,” Jay mumbled. 
His father slapped him on his shoulder encouragingly. “Trust me. Never let fear stop you from going for what you want.” 
The wise words really hit home for Jay. Just not in the way his father had intended. 
The next day, he was filled with courage. Nothing could have stopped him as he made his way to his destination. Hallways passed, one after the other. Students still tried to huddle around him, trying to talk to the quarterback who had risen to his former glory.
Jay didn’t give a shit about any of them. 
All he could think about was you.
“Y/N,” he panted, throwing open the door to the study room. “Y/N, I like you. A lot.” 
You slowly turned to face him, your breath hitching in your throat.
“I never really saw myself with a girl like you before, because I usually just go for hot girls—not that you’re not hot!” he corrected himself when he saw your eyebrows furrow. “You’re just hot in a different way and I love it so fucking much. I can’t stop thinking about you and it’s really driving me out of my mind. Like, come on, four weeks? How is that all it took for me to be head over heels for you? You use words like perseverated and truncated—which is a really cool word for short, but I never really knew that before I met you. I have so many things to say to you, but I’ll try to keep it... truncated.”
Taking a deep breath, he continued, “I like hanging out with you. I think it’s cool that you think I can be smart—though you didn’t before, which is completely fine because no one else knew of my academic potential either. You listen to violin music and watch movies with the typing at the bottom and my whole life, I’ve loved football, but it’s weird because it just doesn’t seem to matter to me now because it doesn’t matter to you. I want you to come to my game, Y/N. I know that you have a boyfriend, but guess what? He’s not here right now. I am! And I like you and I think you should go out with me!” 
Done with his confession and completely out of breath, Jay waited for your answer. 
You wanted to pull him in an embrace and say yes! Yes, you liked him back and that you wanted to come to his game and spend the rest of senior year with him. You wanted to put your arms around his neck and pull him into a kiss and say sorry for everything you had done to hurt him. 
But you couldn’t. 
Though you planned to break up with him two days later, you still had a boyfriend. You were still committed to another person, and putting your thoughts into action would mean you cheated on him. You liked Jay, and you didn’t want to hurt his feelings.
But you weren’t a cheater. 
“Jay,” you whispered, your heart breaking because of what you were about to do next. “That is all so nice of you to say, but my boyfriend is coming over on Friday to spend Thanksgiving with my family. I don’t think I’ll be able to come to your game, but thanks. Really. It was really kind of you to invite me.”
The moment the words were out, you realised you had fucked up. Again. There could have been a gentler way to reject him temporarily. Maybe you, too, should have told him how you felt. Maybe you should have asked him to wait till you broke up with your boyfriend. 
But it didn’t seem right. Confessing to someone else while you were still in a relationship did not feel right. 
“Oh.” He deflated. A sense of deja vu washed over you. “No, that’s fine.” He nervously chuckled. “It’s completely fine. I’m, uh, asking everyone to my game. Not just you. So, uh—” he cleared his throat— “yeah, I’ll be leaving now.”
You watched him trudge out of the study room in silence, hating yourself for what you had done, but knowing that it was the right thing to do. 
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Friday rolled around within no time. 
The school was buzzing with activity and excitement. The game that everyone was once dreading to go to, but now couldn’t wait to attend, was going to start in less than twenty minutes.
The star quarterback was back after all.
The coach was sure, the principal was sure, the entire population in the stands was sure that Jay would lead them to victory. That he would keep his winning streak going and completely obliterate Willow Creek High on the field. 
But the boy everyone was counting on was nowhere to be seen. 
He was supposed to be warming up along with his teammates, not freaking out in the empty locker room.
“Shit,” Jay breathed, burying his head in his hands. His dad was right—he was nervous. He was putting everything on the line by playing in the championship without practice. Recruiters were sitting in the stands out there. Anything less than an outstanding performance would result in him losing the scholarship along with his reputation. 
A few months ago, he was so sure he could do well. He was so sure he would be the chosen candidate. But now, he was doubting everything. 
Jay was scared of humiliating himself on the field. He was scared of disappointing every person who was counting on him. There was a lot of pressure, a lot of stress. 
For the first time in a long time, Jay didn’t believe in himself. 
Trying to labour his breathing and stop the involuntary shaking of his feet, he scolded himself, “You can do this. You’ve done this before, and you’re better than every fucking player out there. The scholarship is yours and yours only, and you need to get your shit together.” 
The pep talk barely helped. 
Jay pushed himself to his feet and began making his way to the field. He felt cold and hot at the same time, and his heart was racing faster than it ever had. 
“Where were you?” his coach demanded the moment he spotted him. “You’re supposed to be warming up with the others.”
“Sorry,” Jay croaked, pushing past the man. He was already on edge and he didn’t need to be scolded. 
Jay’s eyes scanned the stands in search of you as he made his way to his teammates. He knew you weren’t going to come, but he had to make sure. He had to get rid of the hope in him that simply refused to die. 
His eyes darted in every single direction, zooming in on every single girl to make sure that it wasn’t you. 
Jay hated the disappointment that filled him when he didn’t spot your familiar face. Was he really so desperate for your validation and support? 
Taking a deep breath and removing his gaze from the stands, he reminded himself that today wasn’t about you or his unrequited feelings. 
It was about the game and doing well in it. Repeating the same thought like a mantra in his mind, he put on his biggest grin and hollered to the crowd and his teammates, “Who’s ready to kick Willow Creek’s butt?!”
The answering whoops and cheers only made him feel worse about himself. 
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You were nervous. 
Your hands were cold and you were having trouble breathing. You had never broken up with anyone in your entire life. You didn’t know how you were supposed to do it.
As a precautionary measure, you had tried watching a YouTube video, but doing that had only made you feel pathetic about yourself. 
You could do this. You could be true to yourself and to your boyfriend. For once, you could tell him what you were really feeling. 
“So nice to see you,” your mom chirped, pulling him into a hug. “It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?”
“Yeah,” your boyfriend agreed. Removing his beanie, gloves and coat, he hung them on the rack near the front door. His eyes caught yours and he smiled. “I missed you.”
You forced a smile on your face and nodded, allowing him to lightly kiss you on your cheek. 
Your dad came down a few minutes later. Your boyfriend made to shake his hand, but your father slapped it away and pulled him into an embrace instead. They shared a joke like old buddies, causing your nervousness to grow even more.
God, this was going to be so hard. Your parents loved him. They adored him and treated him like he was a part of your family. 
The breakup wouldn’t just affect you and your boyfriend, it would affect your parents too. Somehow, they’d become a part of your relationship.
Looping her arm through his, your mother began to pull your boyfriend towards the living room. “Come on in and sit. I’ll prepare the table along with Y/N’s father.” 
“I can help instead of dad,” you spoke up hastily, gripping your mother’s hand and tugging her away from your boyfriend. You didn’t want to spend time with him alone. Not until after dinner—when it was time to break up with him. 
“Y/N,” your mom said sharply. “Stop being rude. Go and spend some time with him. The two of you haven’t met in over a month.”
Before you could protest, your mother snatched her hand out of your hold and left the room with your father. Nervously, you glanced at your boyfriend. 
He looked concerned, knowing something was wrong with you. “What’s the matter?” he asked, slipping his hand into yours. “Did something happen?”
Fuck. You were an idiot to think you could wait until after dinner. It would have been cruel of you to act like nothing was wrong the entire time, and then drop the bomb on him right before he was about to leave. 
You had to be honest. Now. 
Taking a deep breath, you removed your hand from his. 
“Heeseung, we need to talk.” 
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Jay was not playing well.
He couldn’t bring himself to focus on the game. He kept getting tackled to the ground by the opposing team. At this point, he wasn’t even playing the game. He was just hanging around on the field, trying to defend his teammates when the ball was in their possession. 
The scoreboard was simply tragic. The first half had already come to an end, and Jay’s team was clearly losing. 
One-third of the crowd had already started to leave, and the ones who were still sitting in the stands were all upset. Jay could practically hear their thoughts. They were probably all cursing him out in their heads. 
Then there was the scholarship. There was no way the recruiters were going to choose him now. They were probably calling Jay’s coach an idiot for recommending him to them. 
Jay removed his helmet and slumped down on a bench on the sidelines. His eyes were blank and his face was void of any emotion. 
When he heard footsteps approaching him, he raised his head and flatly greeted, “Hey, dad.”
“Hey,” his dad replied, sitting down beside Jay. “What is going on, son? Why are you playing like a toddler?” 
Jay laughed humorlessly. “I don’t know. I don’t know what’s happening to me or what’s wrong with me. I’m trying to focus but all these weird thoughts keep popping into my head. I keep thinking that maybe I shouldn’t have played. Then I think I should have just studied instead. And then I think what if I hurt my foot even more. I’m completely freaking myself out over here!”
Jay buried his head in his hands, trying to push his eyes back into his skull with his palms. He wasn’t going to cry again. 
“Have you ever thought that maybe that’s the problem?” his father quietly asked him. 
“What?” Jay snapped, glancing up at him. “What do you mean?” 
“You’re thinking too much,” his father explained. Putting a hand on Jay’s shoulder, he made his son completely look at him. “Everything good that ever happened to you in your life, happened because you weren’t thinking. Well, save for the one instance when you got drunk and broke your leg. But maybe, that wasn’t such a bad thing either.”
Jay raised an eyebrow. 
“Everything has been so easy for you,” his dad explained. “You barely study, but still pass all your classes. From what I’ve heard from your teachers, you’re kind of a jerk sometimes, but you’re still one of the most lovable and popular kids in your high school. Your mom and I are average looking at best, but look at the masterpiece you are!” 
Jay huffed a small laugh, feeling some of his nervousness dissipate. “That’s not true.” 
His father smiled softly. “The only time you’ve ever had to truly work hard was during these four weeks. You began to realise that life wasn’t easy and that you couldn’t just cruise your way through it. For the first time, you had to face actual hardship. You had to take things seriously, not for granted. Your accident has changed you for the better. The same accident that was a result of you not using your brain. So, Jay, I need you to not think right now. I need you to go out there and give your best. I need you to turn the tide and I need you to win this fucking game!”
Jay gaped, staring at his father with wide eyes. “You just cursed in front of me!”
“What are you, a five-year-old?” his dad asked incredulously. 
“I mean,” Jay muttered, “it was kind of a big deal. But—” he raised his hands in defence when his father gave him the stink eye— “I get what you’re saying. It was really helpful, dad. Thank you.”
“It better have been. I gave popcorn duty to your mom, and I know for a fact that she’s going to get caramel. You know how much I hate caramel.” His father gagged to express the sentiment. 
Jay chuckled and got up from his seat, putting his helmet back on his head. As he walked over to the field again, he was filled with a different sort of vigour. His father’s speech had done wonders in boosting his confidence. 
Jay was a monster in the second half. He did exactly what his father had ordered him to do. Switching his brain off and scoring a total of four touchdowns, he turned the tide of the game.
He led his team to victory. As soon as he scored the last touchdown and the time was over, the crowd in the stands was up and running towards the field. He was tackled from all sides. People were congratulating him and slapping him on his back for a job well done. 
Jay was at his happiest at that moment. 
When he began making his way back to the locker room along with his team, a man called his name. A recruiter, Jay realised. He separated from the rest of the players and jogged over to where he was standing on the sidelines.
“That was one hell of a second-half you played there, Park! I’m really hoping to see you and that healed foot of yours at East Indy next year.” 
Jay grinned and slipped his hand into the recruiter’s, giving him a solid handshake. “My foot and I would absolutely love that, sir.” 
“All right.” He laughed and slapped Jay on the shoulder. “I will be contacting you and making everything official later on. Go dragons!” 
With those being his last words, the recruiter left Jay to his own devices. Not wasting any more time on the field, Jay began walking toward the locker again. 
He was so happy that he couldn’t wipe the stupid smile off his face. He wasn’t sure anything could wipe the stupid smile off his—
Stopping dead in his tracks, Jay’s breath hitched in his throat when he saw who was leaning against the entrance that led to the locker room. 
You.
You were bundled up in a sweater, beanie, a pair of gloves and a scarf, staring at him with a soft smile on your face. Uncrossing your arms from your chest, you approached him with a small smile. “Hey.”
“Hey,” Jay breathed. He couldn’t believe you were standing in front of him. 
“That was a really amazing game. I’ve never seen anything like it,” you complimented. Pursing your lips to stop them from tugging upwards, you said, “I’m not gonna tell you that you were awesome because you know you’re awesome, but that was pretty awesome.” 
You were standing so close to him, that Jay could barely breathe. With much difficulty, he asked, “Wait, you saw the game? I thought you had dinner with your boyfriend.”
You shrugged. “Yeah, well, that kinda got cut short when I told him I liked someone else.”
Jay’s heart plummeted. “You like someone else?” 
You laughed at the confused expression on his face. “Yeah. You.”
Oh. Oh. 
Jay literally staggered back a step, the shock of your confession completely overwhelming him. His eyes widened and the helmet slipped out of his hand. His heart was thudding against his chest so furiously that he was surprised he didn’t drop dead because of an attack. “You do?”
"I do," you confirmed. "Do you have any plans right now?”
“I can blow them off,” he replied quickly. “Did you have something in mind?”
You grabbed his jersey and pulled him towards you, whispering, “This.”
Before Jay could realise what you meant (he was having a hard time processing information since he was told to not think), your lips were on his. 
For a second, he was frozen in place but was quick to reciprocate once he regained his senses. His hands made their way around your waist, drawing you closer and pressing your body flush against his. 
You snaked your own hands around his neck and tugged him lower so that you could kiss him better. 
Jay realised what you were trying to do and dipped his head, tilting it to the side to deepen the kiss. 
Removing your gloves while your lips were still slotted with his, you ran your bare fingers through his hair. The strands were slick with sweat, but you didn’t mind; you needed your hands to be engaged. 
Jay seemed to return the feeling since one of his hands moved from your waist and cupped your face, its thumb gently caressing your cheekbone. 
Feeling something cold land on your cheek, you detached your mouth from Jay’s and looked towards the sky. 
You smiled. “The first snow.” 
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” he asked, holding out his palm so that he could catch a few flakes in it. “Kinda makes our first kiss cliché, though.” 
“We’ve kissed before,” you pointed out. 
“Yeah, but it did more harm than good. Besides, it wasn’t very memorable, you know? I’d rather we consider this as our first kiss.” 
Your eyes softened. “Well, that kiss was what made me realise I liked you. That you were the one I wanted to spend the rest of my senior year with. Had it not happened, I don’t think we could’ve come so far. Memorable or not, that kiss was what kick-started our relationship.”
Slipping his hand into yours, he nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.” 
“And, uh, about what I said when you came to tell me you were going to play in the championship the other day,” you timidly began. “I’m sorry. For all of it. You didn’t deserve any of the shit I gave you. I don’t know what possessed me to say all those mean things. I guess I was just being selfish. I should have supported you like a good friend, not dragged you down and ruined your day. 
“I understand if you don’t want to forgive me,” you added. “I don’t forgive myself either.”
Jay softly kissed you again and rested his forehead against yours. 
He mumbled, “I won’t lie; what you said that day did hurt me. You kinda rained down on my parade by reacting the way you did, but it’s all in the past now. You feel bad for what you did and you’ve already apologised. That’s enough for me and I forgive you. I want to start anew with you by my side and no grudges between us.”
Your eyes turned misty and your throat clenched from the sniffle you were trying to keep contained. Jay was perfect. Just like that, he had forgiven you and given you a second chance you didn’t think you deserved. You weren’t going to throw it away. 
“Are you crying?” He gasped when he saw your glistening eyes. 
“No,” you weakly denied, choking on your tears. “I’m not.”
Jay panicked. He didn’t know what he was supposed to do when people cried. He didn’t want to say or do something stupid while he attempted to console you. 
Before he could come up with some way to comfort you, you wrapped your arm around his waist and buried your face in his neck. Tears mixed with sweat and Jay put his hand on your head, caressing your hair silently. He let you cry your heart out, mentally reprimanding himself for making his speech emotional. 
As the minutes passed, your sniffles began dying down. Finally, you shifted away and muttered, “You stink.”
Jay’s eyes crinkled, a soft laugh escaping his lips. “Sorry. You see, I played in this championship, led my team to victory and bagged a scholarship all in one day. As I was making my way to the lockers, this girl—a fan, I’m guessing—blocked my way and started to confess— OW!” he whined when you hit him playfully. “Not my shoulder! A Willow Creek asshole rammed into it.”
“Yeah, well, don’t tease me if you don’t want me to smack you,” you snapped, but laughed at his narcissistic attitude and massaged the spot you had hit nonetheless. 
“I better go shower now,” Jay said. “I feel disgusting.”
“Do you want me to wait or—?”
“Of course, I want you to wait. I want to spend time with you.” 
“So would this be our first date?” you mused. 
“Wait, no,” Jay panicked again. “I want our first date to be memorable, not—”
“Jay,” you interrupted him, your voice stern. “I really don’t care about making our firsts memorable. As long as you’re there with me, it doesn’t matter. It’s the happiness in the small, sporadic things that stays with us forever. Grand gestures don’t mean shit.” 
“Gee, okay,” he grumbled. “You’re not a romantic, I get it.”
You started. “Hey! That’s not—”
“Shower time!” Jay announced, making his way to the locker room. “Wait for me by the stands, would you? I will be back within ten minutes.”
You rolled your eyes and obliged, beginning to walk over to where he had asked you to wait. 
You had taken no more than five steps when Jay called your name again. 
“Did you watch the match from the start?” he inquired. 
“No,” you answered. “I was breaking up with my boyfriend, remember? I saw the second half, though. Why do you ask?”
Jay grinned. “No reason. Just wanted to let you know that I was really awesome in the first half too, no matter what anyone else in the school may tell you.” 
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kikithedeceiver · 8 months
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MILGRAM - Mukuhara Kazui should be INNOCENT/FORGIVEN
I’m not very vocal online anymore and prefer to vibe to whatever I’m into. But this man’s MV came out on my birthday, solidifying my view about him, and I want to give my own view on why he should be seen as INNOCENT/FORGIVEN for his crime since his verdict is near 50/50, but getting closer to GUILTY/UNFORGIVEN as the days pass.
Just a heads up, I’m also open for other interpretation on why Kazui should be INNOCENT/FORGIVEN or GUILTY/UNFORGIVEN. I love hearing other’s opinions on these. 
Also going to just use FORGIVE and UNFORGIVE now. I prefer the literal term instead of the black-and-white choice of GUILTY and INNOCENT.
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Honestly, I still don’t understand why fans want to vote Kazui as UNFORGIVEN. From what I have gathered so far, people are voting him UNFORGIVEN because he might have been tactless when he confessed to his wife, Hinako, and voting him FORGIVEN does nothing for him and the story MILGRAM poses. Or, just for the hell of it because lolz.
I...won’t get into that part too deeply. Mostly it’s a joke and I don’t want to take a series too seriously. But c’mon for those who actually see the guy as forgivable, y’know?
1) Kazui was tactless when he confessed to Hinako
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Anyways, for the opinion that Kazui was tactless when he confessed to his wife, I have to disagree. Remember, Milgram extracts the mental images from the prisoners based on their thoughts and how they feel and believe during the time the MVs are made. A case in point is Mahiru’s ‘I Love You’ MV, which kept showing how beautifully loving she was with her boyfriend, but she can also see that it might have been toxic from her ignorance.
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What I’m saying is that Kazui might be pushing for the UNFORGIVEN verdict because he thinks, or even wants to show us, that it was his fault. He wants us to believe that he was tactless when he confessed to Hinako. I mean, he doesn’t see himself as normal (most likely he is a closet gay). Maybe even a monster because of what happened to Hinako when he confessed he lied.
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From all we know, maybe this is what happened. Or this is what he thinks happened and Hinako’s reaction in the MV was exaggerated because of his guilt he carries. People can view things that happened in a different way, it all comes down to perspective, in the end. Afterall, in the end, Kazui felt guilty for what happened to Hinako, and even put back on the mask at the end of HALF and, according to his 2nd voice drama, confessed he would have rather continued lying if it meant she would have lived.
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2) Kazui should be voted GUILTY/UNOFRGIVEN for his character and MILGRAM
This is an interesting take, I’ll admit. However, I have to disagree. And I have a lot of reasons, so sit tight.
First of all, this is based on how I feel and why I vote Kazui as /FORGIVEN. Like how the majority doesn’t see Yuno’s crime as murder, I don’t see Kazui’s crime as one either. His confession was never intended to harm Hinako as the outcome anyway. He was tired of lying, and tried to be truthful for once, and it backfired spectacularly in his face thanks to it, thus causing him to wear the mask again and wished he continued lying instead. This is one of those happened in the wrong place at the wrong time situation. Maybe if he was truthful at maybe a safer location (away from the balcony), then the outcome would have ended with no bloodshed.
Also, all of MILGRAM’s prisoners are murderers, yes, but they’re murderers that sort of make you question if they are one or not. Can ignorance that leads to the death of a partner be murder? Is organ harvesting from a brain-dead patient a murder? If someone followed orders to kill, are they a murderer?
So if someone confessed to a lie they’ve been saying for so long and resulted in someone dying from it, is that murder?
To me, no. It was just the worst result that Kazui never intended to happen.
Also, I don’t get why people are voting Kazui as FORGIVEN when he’s basically the same as Mahiru. They both have partners they never intended to harm from the beginning - being truly in love or not. The only difference is that Mahiru was ignorant of how her love affected her boyfriend, while Kazui put up with the lie for the sake of what’s ‘normal’ in love, and he tried to stop the lie, and, again, it failed on him big time. So like how Fuuta and Kotoko are similar in their crimes, Mahiru and Kazui are the same as well. 
Also voting Kazui as UNFORGIVEN sounds like it will backfire like how it did with Mahiru and Amane in Trial 1. Now I only got into the series when I stumbled onto Muu’s 2nd MV, but from what I heard, and correct me if I’m wrong, people voted Amane as UNFORGIVEN back then because it was to make her ‘realise her sins’. And the result is a crazed Amame because of it.
Now I don’t believe Kazui will go batshit crazy like Amane if we vote him UNOFORGIVEN for this trial, but something tells me it will backfire more if we don’t vote him as FORGIVEN. By saying he’s in the wrong, especially if we’re correct on what he was lying about, it’s like we’re denying him because we reached that truth, and he should be punished for it. By denying him, we’re basically doing the same thing like what happened to Mahiru and Amane as well.
Also, yes I’m aware from a meta-perspective that it’s better to have him FORGIVEN because he’s the only one who can go up against Kotoko (and maybe including Amane and Mikoto), and maybe stop Haruka from offing himself after this trial ends. And I agree! This is also one of the reasons why I say to forgive him to protect others in MILGRAM. However, it is sort of safe to say that no one will die if Kazui is voted UNFORGIVEN. I mean from a storytelling perspective, it will be a waste to kill off the characters and make the last trial shorter because of it...
But! I still don’t want any other prisoners harmed because of Haruka, Amane, Mikoto and Kotoko if Kazui is voted UNFORGIVEN. The prison in MILGRAM will go even more hellish if that happens, and I’m not living up to that drama and am not doing it for the sake of drama. Again I don’t want more situations born from what happened to Amane. We should really choose wisely on why we vote, not because of what we want to happen in MILGRAM, but really personal belief whether the crime committed by the prisoners is forgivable or not.
In the end, I think what is important for Kazui is what he wants from us - to know his sin. He pointed out from his voice drama that we were wrong about him cheating. It’s most likely that he is a closet gay at this point. Voting for him UNFORGIVEN will most likely enforce how he isn’t normal, and being gay does make him a murderer, as shown at the end of his CAT MV. But really, it isn’t. His crime was lying. When he tried to confess, he didn’t intend death to follow.
I’m sure if he’s voted FORGIVEN in the end, Kazui will hear our reasonings that we think he’s gay. I mean, Yuno seem to be able to hear our opinions on her from the 1st trial according to her 2nd voice drama. So, I say to vote for Kazui to be FORGIVEN and let him know what we think his sin is likely this time. If he didn’t feel anything from it, we’ll leave that up to the last trial.
Cheers and thank you if you read this far.
TL;DR: Kazui should be voted FORGIVEN. The interpretation of his CAT MV can be that he was tactless when he confessed to what he lied about to Hinako, but that might be from his guilt and/or pushing us to make him UNFORGIVEN. Also, voting him so UNFORGIVEN sounds like it will backfire like it did with Amane during the 1st trial. Just realise his sin, most likely he’s gay, and vote based if you think confessing to a lie that caused unintended death is murder or not.
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evcndiaz · 6 months
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No one asked but here's my ranking on all the non-main 9-1-1 girlfriends so far:
Tatiana: 9.5/10 - Yes, she gets points knocked off for being an asshole to Chimney in Season 1 but in all fairness, who among us has not pardoned the sins of a pretty lady? Also, she redeemed herself! She owned up to her actions, acknowledged the hurt she caused him, and just overall turned around and bettered herself. this is a Tatiana stan account, argue with the wall
Eva: 3/10 - Okay, did she change? Yes. Was that good? Yes. Do I still hold a grudge? Yes. The only reason she's slightly higher than Taylor is because I'm giving her ONE point for honoring her journey to sobriety and going to talk to Hen even when I'm sure it was emotional and scary. Glad she's gone forever.
Ana: 6.5/10 - Ana gets points for being a petty bitch, I'm not gonna lie. Was she a cardboard cutout for most of her and Eddie's relationship? Yes! But even though she didn't say a lot, she was peepin some shit. Her whole "oH yOu'Re NoT aBoUt To PaSs OuT aRe YoU" when Eddie was breaking up with her... While objectively a very rude and heartless thing to say, her vitriol actually made her interesting. Had to knock off points for all the salads during a blackout otherwise she would have gotten 7/10.
Taylor: -59679680492/10 - Evil bitch. I have never felt so misogynistic as I do when I see her face and hear her voice on my screen. Exploited her relationship with Buck to get a good story, multiple times, AND wrote a BOOK about it. As if that wasn't bad enough. Didn't learn a single lesson after all the years and opportunities she had to better herself. Has no self-respect. Has no regard for other people's suffering. Selfish as fuck. Oh yeah, she almost got Chimney and Hen killed, like...... anyways. I hope I never see her fucking face again cause if I do, I'm gonna jump through the screen and beat her ass and y'all can run and tell that !!!!! I'm getting riled up just thinking about it !!!!!!
Abby: 6/10 - Honestly, y'all are gonna hate me, but as far as first loves go, Abby was not bad. She taught Buck, inadvertently and intentionally, a lot about being a man, and about the kind of man he wanted to be and that's not for nothing. She was going through a lot and she could have done things a lot differently re: the end of their relationship and basically ghosting him, but I can't fault her for trying to find herself after the ordeal of being a caretaker and losing her mom. Honestly Abby's a good character and her arc was good fuck you guys 😭😭😭
Ali: 9/10 - My wife. Smart. Pretty. Good chemistry with Buck. Encouraged him to pick his loft which means she's got good taste and also Eddie gave Buck an icepack on the balcony of that loft in 5x04 and that wouldn't have happened without Ali so we should be thanking her.
*Natalia, Marisol, and Lucy don't count.
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way-of-love · 1 year
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The Heat of Adam (Teth-Adam x FemReader) (SPOILERS) (R-RATED) (PART 2)
Alright guys, here's PART 2! I've been quite sick so please bare with me as I try to write these beautiful ideas on my laptop! Also thank you so much to those who truly found this story a good read, love you all!!
And yes there will be a part 3!
PART 1 PART 3
-Currently you are the sister-in-law to Isis, the woman who found the tomb of Teth-Adam. You are the sister of the deceased husband of Isis and the only living aunt of Among, Isis and your brothers son. You felt for Adam during your time with him knowing all along that he was filled with more good than bad. During your journey with him and your family, you finally knew you cared for him more than you should...-
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After internally admitting your feelings for the hero you were now waiting for the perfect moment to admit how you felt to him. You knew it would be difficult, especially knowing his past and what the poor man went through with his previous family. Not that you were saying you’d want to start one with him but, you know, maybe he could start something with you?  
You were with him hours ago when he admitted to wanting to spend more time with you. That, you obviously didn’t deny. He sat with you at the foot of the throne talking and giving you an insight into his past, even spoke briefly about his wife and son that he thought he allowed to die. That, he blamed himself for. You knew there was nothing he could’ve done, or anyone for that matter because after all everyone was still human. For him, it was a mistake he truly wasn’t going to make again. And he made that perfectly clear to you. He confessed he enjoyed speaking to you about anything and everything and he was grateful for the things your family had done for him and you for always being there and showing you how the world changed, how his world has changed.  
Then it came to the hardest thing you think he had to do yet, he confessed that he would have to go away for a while and discuss a few things with ‘important’ people. And he won’t be back until those discussions are over. In your mind you thought the Justice League finally snatched him up, but he quickly shut that idea down when it presented itself with Superman. Khandaq only had a hero for a few days and already the world was snatching him for itself, well the damn Justice League was. And you, left with nothing but the ghost of him until he returns.  
First, you brother was taken and killed, your nephew gets kidnapped but thankfully saved and now the only man you’ve ever felt something for was leaving. Oh, how cruel the world could be. 
You sat in the living room early that morning when Adam dropped you off through the hole in the wall by the shabby balcony, saying he’d visit before he departed. After spending those few hours just talking to him and hanging by the thread trying not to fall asleep, he called it a day and flew you home where you found yourself more awake than ever after he flew away. 
You were in a dream-like state replaying the conversation earlier that morning before the sun rose. He kept telling you that when he returned, he’d be a better man than how he was currently. He even asked you to wait for him... did that mean he liked you too? You wanted to ask him so much what he meant by what he said but you couldn't muster up the words to do so. 
“Auntie? When did you get home? I didn’t hear you come in,” Amon, holding his skateboard under one arm and his backpack slung over the other. He looked ready to start his day as usual.  
You glanced back at him with a small smile, even reached a handout for him that he took without hesitation. Though he was a tad confused and a bit worried, you were the fun aunt not the mood dampening aunt. Looking at him reminded you why you never had kids of your own, too much emotion was needed to raise a child and you thought you could never do it in your line of work. But seeing Amon like this caring and comforting you made you realize maybe one kid wouldn’t hurt. After all, if your brother could raise a family, why couldn’t you? 
“Are...you okay auntie?” His brows furrowed in concern while the corner of his mouth tilted up trying to smile a bit hoping to ease this atmosphere of longing you created.  
“After the events of yesterday I’m more than alright. I was so glad that we saved you before anything worse happened. Adam...Black Adam is a hero, without him I’m not sure we’d save you,” Amon smiled warmly at you before dropping to one knee beside where you sat placing his skateboard down and looking up at you. 
“You saved me too, Auntie. You’re a hero too. After dad...died. It was hard on both me and mom, but mom took it the hardest. Then you started living with us and it felt like Dad never left. You helped mom find justice for him and while you did that, you guys found Teth- Adam! I mean, you are the reason he even stayed here in Khandaq,” Amon looked more bewildered with every word that left his mouth. It warmed your heart seeing him like this, and it was all thanks to Adam. Though one thing did stick out about what he said.  
With furrowed brows you asked him, “What do you mean he stayed because of me? He stayed because this is all he’s known...for the time being,”  
Amon gave you a knowing look and shook his head, he looked like he had a secret he wasn’t going to tell you,” Auntie, Black Adam wouldn’t have stayed here in the city if it weren't for you,” The young boy stood back up and placed a solemn hand on your shoulder feigning pity, “Just wait ‘till he tells you because I don’t like meddling in adult stuff.” 
You sat there staring pan faced at your nephew trying to understand what exactly this kid was saying at eight or nine in the morning. Your brain wasn’t functioning quickly enough for him, so he shakes his head, picks up his skateboard and heads towards the apartment door. 
“Amon you better not be pulling my leg here or I swear no more late-night secret comms tapping.” Slowly you came to a stand and narrowed your tired eyes at him and all he did was snicker. 
“Auntie, I’m not sure if adults still call it this but... Black Adam does like you. He’s just, how do you say, like a rock. Stubborn and doesn’t admit it easily like a normal person just give him time.” 
You didn’t realize it then, but Teth- Adam left a big mark in not only your life but in your families lives as well. It was going to be a hard... goodness however long he was going to be away. You just hoped by the time he comes back things, feelings will be the same and that finally you could tell him just how much you care for him. 
------------------------------------ 
ONE YEAR AND A FEW MONTHS LATER  
As it turns out after saving a few cities with the help of the Justice League Black Adam was getting a handle of this superhero stuff. But the damage, the intel you worked for, was taken for granted. You had hoped that he wouldn’t be over glorified like all those red, white, blue washed heroes but turns out he was slowly becoming just like them.  
The real heroes were the ones who rebuilt, sacrificed their very lives for information that delt damage to their enemies. Who killed their enemy. Yet, the root of evil keeps coming back with more heads after one was slain. So many people suffered because of these decisions, people without power never lasted long in this world, it just wasn’t fair.  
Now, you who worked for a secret organization had an insight into everything these heroes did thanks to a leak in Amandas Wallers systems, you knew what the heroes knew so that meant your organization did too. With vital information like this you could easily sell it to the highest bidder on the blackest market known to man or do the good thing and use it to your advantage. Of course, you were the good doer and used it to better the lives of people who were done wrong by heroes and their mottos.  
Shifting the black hot liquid in the mug you and Isis, your sister-in-law, watched the news in your new boxed tv. Her brother managed to scrape together some electronic parts to fix a semi modern tv up. Amon was currently in school, so he didn’t have that pleasure to witness the little surprise that was in store for the adults that morning.  
After a year of a no call no letter and even a no show of Adam you simply gave up. You tried to contact him without raising suspicion or alarms in your direction, but you heard nothing back from him. Even when you went away to America on a solo mission, you were so close to his floating form that you called to him, but he did not answer. Right then you knew this was not the Black Adam that asked you to wait for him, this was Americas Black Adam. And with a heavy heart you accomplished your mission and returned home heartbroken and confused. Why’d he ignore you like that? You knew there was nothing wrong with his hearing. He was superhuman! He chooses to ignore you that day. 
It took you weeks to get over that ache in your chest, you went on missions, took under the table jobs until you ended up hurting yourself on a dangerous info retrieval mission by Russia. You were in an arm cast for months, last week the doctor gave the okay and removed it. Isis was also scolding you about how much you’ve been working, that if you worked too hard, you’ll land in an early grave…just like your older brother. It hurt but it was true. He lived his life trying to free Khandaq and died trying so hard to do so. You’ll be next if you don’t take a break. 
After a few calls and Amons complaints to you, you decided to take a month off to…relax. Now at a different apartment further from the city and closer to Isis’s new teaching job in the university, you ran the house for her. The freed city gave her the job she lost back with more privileges, meaning this spacious apartment and higher pay. Amon was taking full advantage of the time he had now that his mother was working at the university; going out exploring more of the ruins before his mother came home, discovering more hidden nooks and crannies inside the apartment building. You always thought he was a smart kid, so you gave him a time limit to do so. 
He reminded you so much of you and your brother when you both were just children. As you cleaned up around the kitchen you noticed the picture Isis kept of the small family when your brother first moved in with her. The four of you, Isis, your brother, and her brother were piled onto a tiny kitchen table with open boxes everywhere filled with dishes or glasses. Isis was pregnant with Amon during that time and didn’t know, that’s what made the picture so sweet. Everyone was in it. Everyone except Adam. 
With a heavy sigh you placed the picture back on the small fridge replaying the memories you had in that one tiny apartment when you heard the front door of the apartment open. Immediately you thought Amon was home, so you spoke without looking up from the picture. 
“Dinner’s ready Amon, make sure to wash up and put your skateboard away. Also, dust off whatever dirt you may have so,” You turned around to face Amon, “That your mom…doesn’t…” 
Your words trailed off when you noticed Amon wasn’t the only one standing in the doorway. The big, tall familiar being wearing a dark hood over his head stood there behind a nervous looking Amon. 
He quickly came inside and went straight to you grabbing your arm and shaking it lightly. But your attention stayed fixated on the man who had your heart standing by the now closed door of the shared apartment. You were shocked to see him and even more shocked that he had the audacity to come back. 
“Auntie! Auntie! He came back, Teth Adam came back!” Your poor nephew sounded excited or relieved, you didn’t feel any of that whatsoever. In fact, you felt…angry that he was here. How dare he show up and not even to you or to his people but to your nephew. The one person he knew wouldn’t push him away because of how long he’s been gone.  
“How…How dare you come back?” The words were out your mouth before you could stop them. You saw how his shoulders tensed under his fucking cloak as if what you said hurt him. Oh please. You crossed your arms under your chest and tilted your head as if to say, ‘Explain yourself now.’ 
Amon stood in front of you looking like a kid caught awkwardly in a fight between his married parents. He shuffled closer to you and looked up into your furious eyes,” Auntie, I saw him by the old apartment. He was looking for us, who knows how long he was looking for us!” There he goes justifying the heroes' actions. 
“Khandaq isn’t that big. If he was and wanted to look for us, he’d find us by now on his own,”  
“Auntie please- “ 
“Amon,” His deep voice shook your bones and warmed your core. “Let me talk to your aunt. There’s a lot that needs to be said and I won’t shy away from this confrontation,” 
“Look at you using big hero words,” A scoff left your mouth. 
You guessed that’s all Amon needed and nodded. Adjusting his backpack that was slung over his shoulder he began to head towards the living room but not before stopping by Adam and giving him his own warning a childlike one, “Try not to hurt my aunt again this time.” And he disappeared into the living room. 
The two of you were left, him by the door and you in the kitchen. But you suppose the distance wasn’t a fitting one so Black Adam decided to close that distance and walk slowly, not usually like him, into the kitchen. That stupid hood still covered most of his face except for below his nose so you couldn’t see exactly what he was thinking or see how he was feeling. He now stood a few feet from you peering at you no doubt from under his hood. It was annoying. 
You released an exasperated sigh and raised a hand to pinch the bridge of your nose, “Are you going to leer at me or are you going to give me an explanation? Why’d you suddenly leave without a proper goodbye and not even bother to acknowledge my presence? Did you find an American woman and decided to leave your life behind here? What?” You didn’t realize the tone of your voice was rising until Isis’s brother peeked over at you from the living room with Amon who was also wide eyed. You rarely yelled and when you did it was either while playing a game with Amon or yelling during your own missions but never like this, not when you were upset. 
Being tense like this wasn’t good for the heart. You relaxed a bit well as much as you could while having the man that almost broke your heart standing before you. 
“I know you're upset with me. And you have every right to be. I made you a promise that I intended to keep but I broke it instead,” He reached up and slowly removed his black hood revealing his face to you finally, after a year and some months you saw his face. He looked the same but his dark eyes...they looked so worn. As if he hasn’t slept in days, no scratch that month.  
Without hesitation you raised your hands and cupped his cheeks, worry written all over your face, “What in the world happened to you? Did they send you out into space or something? Adam...you look so bad,”  
He closed his eyes briefly and you felt the way he gently nudged his cheek into your palm some. “I told you, I wanted to come back a changed man. And I did accomplish that,” You only shook your head and took your hands back. A changed man wouldn’t just leave, ignore the person who clearly freed him from that stupid prison, never contact you when he clearly knows you’ve been trying to contact him. Nor does he suddenly come back out of the blue and try to mend things back to how they were. He must’ve seen how conflicted you were, so he didn’t bother reaching for you, he gave you space.  
“I know I have no excuse for the way I acted. Nor do I have an excuse for communicating with you about where I was, when I’d be back,” You didn’t bother to look up at his face now because if you did, you’d probably fold and tell him that it was okay when clearly it wasn’t. He knew how you felt you made it pretty obvious to him when you were helping him run around the city after you freed him with Isis. And for some strange reason your nephew knew Black Adam had a crush or liked you, yet after the whole year of not hearing a single response or even a look of acknowledgment in America to feel reassured that he was the same Adam that flew you to your home that beautiful morning. But you got nothing. Did he even like you? Was that even a thing? 
You felt a thick warm finger tuck under your chin and forced your head up, now you were looking up into those dark eyes that seemed to hold so much emotion as clear as day. Some may think he was glaring down at you and others may think he was plotting your death but for you, for you he looked like he was trying to show you how sorry he felt.  
“I tried to protect you. No one knows you as a spy, they only know you as Y/N the person who helped liberate Khandaq and freed me. If I showed any more interest, then I’d be freeing you from your own prison right now,” He spoke low and close to you. No one knew what you really did as an occupation, it was dangerous work and you only told Adam because...you were head over heels for the brute and truthfully no one would truly believe him, unless...unless he showed interest and Waller decided to investigate. Squeezing your eyes shut it dawned to you that what he was saying was absolutely true. And here you were yelling at him like some kid in middle school all because your feelings were hurt. You must stop hanging with your nephew so much. 
“Adam I... I’m so sorry, I wasn’t even thinking about that. I was just—I didn’t know what I was thinking,” Apology after apology left your lips and all he did was cup your delicate cheeks with his calloused palms and smile, he genuinely smiled down at you.  
“Y/N, there's no need for apologies. You did what you felt and... you thought you were doing the right thing. I, on the other hand, will need to apologize,” Adam leaned in closer to you, shoulders hunched a bit, and he was blocking most of your view from the living room and blocking the view to you.  
Brows furrowed you looked at him confused while cradling his wrists with your hands, “Apologize? You were just protecting me Adam,” Now he was getting a little too close, but you couldn’t jerk your head back even if you wanted to.  
“No, for this,” It didn’t take long for you to put the pieces together as to what he meant but when you did his lips were already on yours. Surprise wasn’t the word to describe how you felt. Excited? In awe? Shocked? Maybe all the above. He was kissing you, really kissing you! This wasn’t a dream...this was real. You slowly closed your eyes and let his slightly chapped lips mold against your softer ones. You’ve dreamt of this day for such a long time and now that it was happening you didn’t know where to put your hands or even breathe. But Adam did. 
He lowered one of his hands to your waist then your hip while your hands slid down his forearms feeling the thick barbed muscle and went straight to those broad shoulder you absolutely drooled over. As big as he was, he sure was gentle. Though you were glad that didn’t stop him from taking the initiative and pushing the kiss up another notch. A tongue gently glided across your bottom lip causing you to stop and open your eyes encountering two dark chocolate orbs staring right back at you half lidded.  
“I apologize,” His voice was hoarse when he whispered, it sent a shiver down your spine. As quickly as he apologized just as quickly his tongue slipped between your awaiting lips crashing against your own tongue. A sudden moan left your lips when you finally got to taste him which in turn made him make a low groan himself. Your tongues were clashing against one another in a heated wet battle of who was sorrier than who but you both knew that wasn’t it. This passionate, desperate kiss was long overdue and now that it was time to collect you both were like teenagers making out.  
His hands no longer respectfully stayed in their PG stations, they now roamed and gripped wherever they could. Gripping your sides, your hips before sliding back and finally cupping your plentiful rear. You were thankful you were wearing shorts because you were able to feel his rough hands upon the skin of your thighs. You pulled at his cape over his shoulders wanting him to be closer, closer than skin. That's what you wanted.  
It wasn’t until he slid his hand back down your thigh and gripped it pulling it up over his hip, you were now flushed against him. Groin against groin and you felt just how happy he was to be kissing you in your sister-in-law's kitchen. Goodness, were you really going to do it here? In the kitchen?  
“What in the hell is going on in here?” Isis’s voice broke you out of your trance causing you to jump and stare wide eyed at Adam who looked like he was about to dive in for another kiss. Luckily you stopped him with a shove to his chest, but he didn’t budge, wouldn't budge. Slowly you stood on your toes on the leg that was touching the ground to peer over at Isis over his shoulder.  
“Um-- Adam is uh... he’s back,” Your other leg was still being held captive by his hand keeping it pressed to his hip. 
“Clearly,” Isis crossed her arms looking at the two of you standing in her kitchen with disapproval written all over her face. “I’ll give you both five minutes and then I want to see you two in the living room.” And with that she turned, giving the two of you some privacy again. 
“We can do a lot in five minutes lets-” Quickly you swatted at his shoulders and shoved him away, red all over your cheeks. 
“Five minutes my ass! Go, get to the living room!” Honestly, it wasn’t possible to do anything in five minutes with a normal person but with Adam, you were hoping a lot could be done in less. 
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foxydivaxx · 5 months
Text
ZoSan Marriage Bliss Part 2
- During award shows, Zoro whispers dirty stuff into Sanji’s ear that makes him giggle.
- Zoro admitted that he had always had a crush on Sanji for years ever since he first saw him on TV but was nervous to approach him until that party. Talk about a successful fanboy
- Sanji often calls Zoro his sweet teddy bear because he gives the best hugs
- Sanji has learned to love and accept himself regardless of his flaws and properly embrace his sexuality thanks to Zoro.
- Sanji’s ideal type is the bad boy with a pretty face that is a softie deep down and is very intelligent, calm and gentle (*coughs* Zoro)
- Zoro stated in an interview that whenever he and Sanji bicker, he always says, “Since when do blondes get this fiesty because golly babe you too spicy for me!!” Sanji always laughs whenever he says that
- Why did Sanji become the Sexy-Dol? Because no one else was brave enough to do that shit. He literally paved the way for others to follow
- Sanji is that guy that laughs at everything on-set
- Zoro calls Sanji kitty because let’s face it, he acts like a mischievous cat at times. Some fans compare Sanji to a fox as well
- Zoro is often compared to a wolf and tiger thanks to his cool demeanour
- Sanji got a strip pole because Zoro wanted to see Sanji’s stripper skills in action. It is obvious where this would lead to.
- According to Zoro, he finds it sexy when Sanji is mad because sex becomes a lot more fun
- Another way Sanji reels Zoro up is to basically touch himself in his presence . The moans are enough to make Zoro fuck him silly
- They both hate snakes though Zoro would at least be man enough to kill one if he ever sees it
- According to Sanji: “Good people have great sex.” Cue Zoro howling with laughter in the background
- On their wedding night, they had sex by their balcony. Thankfully no one saw them or heard Sanji’s moans or screams. Sanji loved Zoro sucking him off and driving him nuts
- Zoro asked Sanji in an interview, “Why are your lyrics that naughty?” Sanji’s response? “I just think about all the crazy things I want you to do to me.” Zoro smirks at that one.
- They are both loud in bed but Sanji takes the cake
- Sanji has actually sucked Zoro off from under a table once
- Sanji got diagnosed with bipolar as of recent. Thankfully Zoro did not judge him and is very understanding
- Zoro is the obvious dom whilst Sanji is the cute yet bratty sub
- Zoro wears a lot of bling and spoils Sanji with bling as well
- They both love cuddles
- Sanji admitted to hating sex as a result of past trauma from previous relationships and abuse from Sukuna in particular. Zoro made him love sex and made him fall in love with being sexy which is why he is comfortable doing the shit he does now
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l0sercat · 1 year
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Hey, can i request a kuzuryuu x reader ?
Where the reader lost him after the beach and they see each other during his game. The reader can die maybe ?
Sorry if its weird
Nonono anon it's not weird. I love it >:))) also Kuzuryuu is maybeee a little ooc but I don't think it's too bad . Also this took me forever 💀
Kuzuryu x reader
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You and Kuzuryuu were close and always stuck by each others side. You always made him laugh and you just wanted him to be happy. He also made you happy and just hang out in his room on his balcony. But when the Beach was set on fire and you couldn't find him you panic. You yelled out his name trying to locate him. It got to bad inside you couldn't find him.
The game ended and you still couldn't fine him. You looked almost everywhere, your eyes filled with tears that threatened to spill. You clenched you fists and looked down, the Beach burning in the background. You started to shake and you bit your lip. You wanted to cry and break down so bad but there were people around.
Kuzuryuu was alive you knew he was he was to smart. You just knew where he was and it killed you that you couldn't find him. You promised each other you would stick together and you weren't going to break it.
You looked around the perimeter of the outskirts of the Beach but still didn't see him. You closed your eyes and yelled in frustration. You slowly say down on the ground and let the tears spill. You stayed quiet the best you could but you couldn't keep the tears in anymore.
You were going to find him no matter what.
------------------
You had a day left on your visa and so you walked to the King of Diamonds game. You weren't that good at diamond games. But you had to do this game. Maybe Kuzuryuu was in this game as well. He was extremely at diamond games.
You made your way to the game to get started. You saw someone who looked familiar but you only saw the back of their head. You moved to your seat and you got a better look. You couldn't believe it, you gasped. "Kuzuryuu?!" You said in disbelief
His head snapped up and his eyes visibly widened. "No.." he whispered. He was glad to see you but knowing the rules he couldn't bear it. He clenched his fists, he wanted to warn you leave but you already sat down and we're locked in. "Kuzuryuu I'm so happy to see you again," you said smiling with tears down your cheeks.
The people there stared at you with confusion. "I thought I lost you forever I knew you weren't dead" you looked at him such joy and love. It broke his heart but he continued to say nothing. You stopped talking and looked at him. "What's wrong Kuzuryuu?..." You asked
Chishiya walked in and sat down officially starting the game. "Hello y/n" he gave a small smile "oh hello Chishiya!" You smiled, Chishiya was talking but you spaced out a bit. You heard the familiar robotic lady voice and payed attention. You listened to her and tried to understand the rules. You understood the rules but didn't know what do. You couldn't come up with a strategy. The smile on your face was wiped off. You started to shake and you panicked. You couldn't survive this.
Your breathing was becoming rapid but you calmed yourself down. You put on your poker face and breathed out. Kuzuryuu looked at you with worry when he saw you panic. It was time for you guys to choose your numbers. You didn't know what to do. You stared blankly at it and chose 35. It was random but you didn't know what to choose.
Kuzuryuu chose his number and stared at you. He remembered that you told him you were terrible at diamond games. He wondered why you would participate in this one. It then struck him, you participated because there was a good chance he was here since he excelled at diamond games. He looked at your blank face. He knew deep down you were terrified and confused. He thought you would never have joined the game but obviously he was wrong.
Everyone chose there numbers and it appeared on the screen. You stared at it and when Kuzuryuu won this round you smiled softly. You looked over at him, he had his hand intertwined in front of him. He stared at you which sent shivers down your spine. You remember when he went down on you and gave you that same stare. Heat pooled in your stomach and you practically melted. But now wasn't the time to think about that.
Chishiya started talking to Kuzuryuu but he ignored him. The other player started talking and Kuzuryuu answered him. Chishiya started taking again, you looked at him. The lady said 'life doesn't have the same value'. Something flickered in his eyes for a brief moment.
The next round started and you chose the number 13. You had no clue what you were doing. You hands started to get sweaty waiting for this to be over. It showed the average and you smiled. You won this round, you let out a giggle. This was probably the only round you were going to win. But you happy you won one. Kuzuryuu gave a small smile at your excited form. You were so amusing to him sometimes.
"Kuzuryuu," "what" you ears perked up at Kuzuryuu's voice, you stared at him. "I think I understand now, the thing that your trying to measure, it's the value of life isn't it?" Your eyebrows furrowed what was Chishiya talking about. Kuzuryuu didn't say anything for a second before starting "No it's not" "then what are you doing," Chisiya pressed "You can tell me" Kuzuryuu stared off it looked like he was thinking something.
The round started and we all picked out numbers. I chose 2 and looked at the screen. I was shocked Chishiya chose 100 wasn't that bad? I didn't dwell on it he probably hadhis own strategy. I couldn't judge since I had no strategy. It's showed the average again and I won again. I was shocked and my smile grew. I was excited and I was surprised. I didn't pay attention to what Chishiya was saying. Kuzuryuu look at me with fondness and love.
In the next round Chishiya won. It was round seven and I chose the number five. The girl won and and she was excited. Letting out a strange excited noise. Another round started and I picked three. Kuzuryuu won. The robotic voice spoke of the two participants who had -10 points. The started to panic, I frowned and stared at them. It would be a painful death, I sighed and wondered if I was next. I looked away not wanting to see what would happen next. They started to scream for help. Kuzuryuu didn't even flinch he just stared ahead. I heard one mans screams of agony before he was cut off. The other started to scream and gurgle but I heard a slam. I flinched and peeked at the bloody mess. "Ah this is starting to look more like a face card game," Chishiya said, I looked at him and he looked at me with a small smile. "Is this the equality your after?"
I quickly looked away and back at Kuzuryuu. We held eye contact for ages before the robotic voice started. "Two new rules will be added, new rule 1: if 2 or more players choose the same number, the will be disqualified from the round and all each lose 1 point. Rule 2: choosing the exact correct number will cause the other players to lose 2 points instead of 1."
The atmosphere in the room was tense. Kuzuryuu looked calm and he sighed, I stared at his long slim fingers. I thought back to a memory, I blushed but quickly shoved it aside. I snapped back to my reality and chose 0. I looked at the screen and everyone chose 0. My eyes widened, my score was now -7.
Another round started and I picked 7. I was shocked when Chishiya chose the correct number. My eyes widened when I realized I would be at -9. But I knew from the beginning I would never win this. I breathed out and leaned back in my chair. I blankly stared at the girl who was going to die. She panicked and started calling Chishiya a cheater. I was amused, I didn't talk to him much but I knew he was smart. So the chances of him cheating were low. He went on to say how he knew what she would pick.
She panicked and started pleading and screaming no. She grabbed and tucked on her belt. The acid fell on her and melted her flesh instantly. "Well she said that not all lives have the same value, think she still believed it up until the bitter end?" I moved my gaze to him.
I sighed with these two I'm totally dead. No way I'll outsmart them. I sighed and stretched my arms out. I don't regret anything. I'm glad I got to see Kuzuryuu again. I smiled, "Tell me have you ever peered behind the curtain seen how the world really works? Watch children die because their parents couldn't afford a few yen for medicine? Seem girls sold off to pay for their parents debts? Been powerless to stop the cycle of poverty?" I frowned and stared at Kuzuryuu.
"A new rule is being added, if a player chooses 0 as their number, the other player will win if they choose 100." I heard Chishiya talking once again but tuned him out. I wasn't going to listen it didn't matter. I already accepted I was going to die when the rules were explained. I looked and smiled at Kuzuryuu sadly. I took in all his features, admiring him.
The round started and I closed my eyes. I hummed and moved my finger around and landed on a number. I opened my eyes to see I chose 69. Chishiya looked at me with a eyebrow raised. "What was that?" He asked, Kuzuryuu looked up without concern. I shrugged my shoulders "I already know I'm going to lose so it doesn't matter what I pick," I grin, "I could never win against you guys, so it's pointless to try, might as well try to make the most of my last moments alive, no?" I say and let out a dry laugh. I looked at the screen and Chishiya won. I clapped my hands "woo good job yahh" I said in a sarcastic tone. Chishiya looked at me with a amused smile. Kuzuryuu looked at me with a saddened look.
His cold blank look was now filled with sadness. He frowned and looked at your smile it would be the last time he saw it. He took in all of your features. You looked at him and gazed lovingly at him. Memories of you and Kuzuryuu beng together flashed through your mind. When you convinced him to dance with you and he was terrible at it which caused you to laugh so hard you couldn't breath. Or when you were in games together. And late nights staring at the sky in his balcony. Tears pricked your eyes.
"I guess it's true, you do see your life flash before you eyes when your about to die" you say smiling and letting out a dry laugh with tears streaming down your face blurring your vision. You stared at Kuzuryuu with love and adoration. "Heh..maybe in another life we'll be together, maybe we can be somewhere where we don't have to constantly fear for our lives.. I'll miss you Kuzuryuu" you smiled at him. His eyes widen and he stares at you, you weren't afraid.
The acid fell and covered you like a blanket. It was painful for a second but soon everything stopped hurting and your vision went dark. You didn't have to worry anymore. One last memory popped in your mind, it was when you first arrived at the Beach you were a bit overwhelmed. Kuzuryuu was there and he helped you get away from everyone there, especially Niragi. You were thankful and you guys spent hours taking. It was then your relationship sparked and he was the first person you ever trusted in this cruel world.
Kuzuryuu stared at you and tears pricked his eyes. His hands still intertwined, clenched. He looked down and he felt his heart ache. "Well that was dramatic" Chishiya commented, Kuzuryuu looked up and glared at him. Chishiya smirked "So they were close to you hm? Who would have thought a king like you would have actually cared for someone?" Chishiya was practically mocking him right now. Kuzuryuu stayed silent and continued on with the game. He stared down and never looked at him.
------------
It was the last round Chishiya chose his number and after a while Kuzuryuu chose . "The following round is over" the robotic voice spoke "So you made your choice, the value of a life can be decided, tell me why you did it" Chishiya spoke, Kuzuryuu looked up and spoke calmly "I did it for my ideals"
"The winner is master Chishiya, a player has reached -10points," Kuzuryuu leaned back and his head tilted up. "It is game over for that player" Kuzuryuu smiled and closed his eyes "it's nice to see you can actually smile" Chishiya said
"I'm finally free, I made my own choice and based on my own ideals," An image of you flashed in his mind. "It's all because of you" tears escaped his eyes and the memory of the Beach burning played in his mind. His smile grew wider and he thought of you again. How you always clung to him and praised him and made him feel good. He was glad he was going to be free and he too wished to see you again in another life.
The acid spilled and poured all over him. It instantly killed him and his body fell against the table hard. Both of you didn't regret a thing.
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Through Thick and Thin
Pairing: Matt Jackson x female!reader
Category: Slight Angst/Fluff
Word count: 4,558
Summary: During a match in the Best of Seven series between The Elite and Death Triangle, you receive an injury while protecting your fiancé, Matt Jackson. You insist that you can do things on your own, but Matt says otherwise, doting on you hand and foot.
Warnings: Swearing, mentions of injury, brief medical talk, inaccurate medical information
Requested by: @mrsmatt — I hope you enjoy every minute of it! ❤️
Tagging: @breezyvk
Masterlist
Taglist
Gif is not mine. Credit to owner
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Matt was dead set on you not being ringside for the newly announced best of seven series. You had been ringside for all the previous matches since The Elite were back from their suspension and you had no plans of stopping, wanting to ensure your boys got the win and were safe the whole way through. You weren’t one to let anyone screw your boys over despite them being more than capable of handling themselves without assistance.
These three men and Brandon were your family. Matt being your fiancé, Nick and Kenny being your ‘brothers’, and Brandon was the one who was your best friend much to people’s shock, assuming it was Nick or Kenny.
You argued with Matt for what felt like forever until Nick and Kenny jumped in to help defuse the argument. Brandon knew to let you be, he would talk to you once you were alone. Nick was trying to get you to see Matt’s point of view all while Kenny was trying to get Matt to see your side. Brandon made countless attempts to tell the guys to let you be for a little bit, seeing how angry and annoyed you were becoming. Unfortunately, Brandon’s words fell on deaf ears until you stormed out of the room. “I tried to tell you to let her be.” Brandon said, shrugging and turning to chase after you.
Brandon knew exactly where you’d run off to. It didn’t matter what arena you were in for a show, if you needed some alone time for whatever reason before the show started, Brandon would always find you up in the balcony seats where you would be slouched down, feet propped up on the back of the seat below you. You liked that Brandon was the only one who knew where you’d be. You weren’t in the mood to deal with Matt, and even Kenny or Nick.
Brandon didn’t say anything as he sat down beside you, dressed in his signature colorful zebra striped track suit, thankfully that was as far as he had gotten before he heard you and Matt arguing, opting to listen in just in case you needed him. “Does he seriously think I’ll mess this series up for them? I’ve never been a distraction before.” You ask Brandon, hurt clearly evident in your voice. Brandon hated seeing you like this, the hurt in your voice and on your face was killing him.
He slung an arm around your shoulders in attempt to comfort you. “I don’t think he meant that whole ‘you’ll be a distraction’ thing. He just doesn’t want you getting hurt because he knows Death Triangle can be extra vicious and this series is definitely when they will be vicious.”
“I get this is important but that still stung to hear him to say that, and I don’t appreciate being made to feel like I’m incompetent. I don’t want to see him anymore today so he won’t have to worry about anything going wrong tonight. I have an interview with Renee later anyways.” You go to stand but Brandon gently grabs your wrist, making you turn your attention to him.
“You both need to talk it out. Calmly and civilly. I don’t like seeing the two of you fighting. Just tell me one thing before you go.” Brandon pleads, still gently holding your wrist while giving you his best puppy eyes. You knew you could have pulled your arm away and walked off, but this is your best friend and he’s never steered you wrong before, always in your corner and giving you advice like you had a feeling he was about to do now. You gesture for him to continue. “Do you love him?”
“Of course I love him, Brandon. We’re getting married in six months. What does that have to do with any of this?” You admit, confused but willing to hear him out. You knew Brandon wouldn’t have asked that question if he didn’t have a reason or something to point out, but you were still lost on what he was getting at.
“It has everything to do with this. Think about it for a second, if the roles were reversed wouldn’t you want him to stay in the back if you knew how dangerous your opponent was? Wouldn’t you want to ensure his safety?” Brandon explains and you sigh, knowing he’s right. You’re just as protective of Matt as he is of you and Brandon knows it, he’s seen it firsthand. “Besides, I’ll be out there to keep an eye on him.”
“Alright, fine. I’ll go talk to him and agree to stay out of it. But, the second he’s in serious danger all that’s out the window.” You tell your best friend in a stern voice. Content with that answer, Brandon let go of your wrist and watched you leave.
Standing outside The Elite’s dressing room, you took a deep breath before knocking. You didn’t want to risk barging in and catching someone (mostly Nick or Kenny) naked, but Matt on the other hand….. Your thoughts were interrupted when the door swung open revealing Nick who was studying your face to determine how you were feeling. “Can I talk to Matt? Please? I want to apologize for—“ You were interrupted by Nick’s voice.
“Come on in. I was actually supposed to be looking for you. He has some things he wants to say too.” Nick stepped out of the way and let you enter the room. Kenny was tying his shoes while Matt stared at his phone. As you got closer you saw exactly what had Matt’s attention — his favorite picture of you from some random time you two ordered food and binged watched one of those ridiculous reality shows that you got him hooked on. He had snuck a picture of you when you were zoned in on the over-the-top drama that was unfolding on the television. You remember questioning him about that particular picture, why he loved it so much and his answer left you with seventeen cavities from pure sweetness. He told you the reason was because you looked so happy, having fun while being lazy, stress and makeup free, snuggled up to him on the couch with a blanket draped over the two of you was the reason he had to snap the picture. He didn’t ever want to forget that moment.
Your heart melted seeing this, and you instantly felt awful for making such a big deal about you not being out there tonight. Brandon was right — he’s always right. “Can I have a minute alone with Matt please?” You ask, looking from Kenny to Nick as they exchanged a look before agreeing and exiting the room. You take a seat next to Matt, silently trying to decide what all you wanted to say. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I flipped out on you and for blowing things out of proportion. I understand that you want to keep me safe, but I didn’t appreciate the way you said all of those things.” You stopped talking when you felt Matt’s hand rest on your leg.
Looking over at him, you see him shaking his head, he had most likely been doing that the whole time you were speaking. “Don’t apologize. I realize now, thanks to Nick and Kenny, that I was too harsh with my words and I shouldn’t have said things that would make you feel like a two year old. I wasn’t considering your feelings and I took my frustration out on you even though you had, and still have, every right to say what you did.” Matt confessed, those big brown eyes told you everything, he was being honest thanks to the tear that began to slip down his cheek. You brought your hand up to gently wipe it away. This really got to Matt and he didn’t want you leave him over this, especially after all the good times you two shared.
“Don’t cry, Matty. We both said things we shouldn’t have and I forgive you. I love you, always have and always will. Besides it’ll take a whole hell of a lot more than that argument to make me leave you.” You pressed a soft kiss to his cheek, a hand coming up to cup the side of his face, your thumb slowly gliding over his cheek in a soothing manner. You watched Matt nod his head, not speaking, worried his voice wouldn’t hold up.
A knock at the door interrupted the moment. “Just a minute!” You called to whoever had awful timing. “Are you okay? Want me to get the door? Or send whoever it is away?” You asked, concern lacing you voice. You weren’t sure if Matt was ready to face anyone other than you at the moment.
You got your answer when Matt spoke, “I’m okay. You can let them in. I’m going to wash my face.” He stood knowing his eyes were most likely red and his face felt heavy from all the worry and emotions from the past hour. You watched him head off to the bathroom before going to open the door, revealing not one person but three — Nick, Kenny, and Brandon.
“Come on in guys. We’re okay, Matt’s in the bathroom washing his face.” You inform the trio knowing they have a million questions for you.
They all enter quietly. The three men notice the photo still pulled up on Matt’s phone where he left it on the table by his water bottle. None of them said a word about it, but you knew they saw it by the glances you saw them exchange. Matt returned from the bathroom and finally Brandon spoke, “We’ve gotta get going. The match starts soon and we can’t be late.” They all nodded heading for the door while you stayed put. You weren’t going to go since it worried Matt so much despite your protests earlier in the day.
“You coming love?” Matt asked, turning around when he didn’t hear you behind him. He held his hand out for you with a sweet smile on his face. You weren’t sure if you should go now after hearing his concerns along with your conversation with Brandon.
“Are you sure? I can stay back here, watch it on the monitor.” You offered only to be shut down by Matt gently pulling you up as he shakes his head.
“I’m sure. We need you out there. I need you out there.” He insisted. “It wouldn’t be right without you.”
“Hurry up lovebirds!” You both hear Nick call out already a distance down the hall. The two of you laugh and make your way towards the tunnel. As you arrive, you can’t help but let out a sigh and suppress an eye roll upon seeing Don waiting with Michael Nakazawa. You loved Nakazawa, he was always so sweet and kind to you, but Don on the other hand, you weren’t too thrilled about seeing. You didn’t trust him like the guys did, something was fishy about him to you but for the sake of the guys, especially Kenny’s, you really hoped you were wrong.
Once it was time for The Elite to make their entrance, you stayed back with Nak and Brandon as the boys shined on the stage as Carry On, Wayward Son blared through the arena’s speaker system. Shortly after, you led Brandon and Nak out as Don headed to commentary. Hallelujah! Thank you Jesus! You cheered, not having to deal with him any longer. Once all of you were in the ring, out came Death Triangle with their music blaring as well. They made their way to the ring with Alex trailing behind hyping them up as always. You had to admit Alex was a pretty good hype man.
Soon the match was underway. You were cheering on The Elite alongside Brandon when you noticed Alex attempting to pass something off to Penta. You were not about to let that happen. You were quick to race over there and confront the two men, Brandon hot on your heels. The argument between the four of you caught the attention of the remaining men in the ring and on the apron, PAC jumped off the apron and stepped directly in front you. Not one to back down from anyone, you weren’t fazed in the slightest, until you looked into his eyes, there was something unsettling about those eyes that made you instantly step back, bumping into Brandon as you did so. Matt and Nick were in between you and PAC before anything escalated while Kenny and Rey battled it out in the ring. Next thing you knew Matt was shoving you back as Rey dove onto the outside and wiped out everyone except for you and Brandon, who was tugging you back to The Elite’s corner.
The match continued as both trios traded blows and high flying maneuvers. You still kept your eye on Alex and whatever he was trying to hand Penta, you never got to see what it was but you had a plethora of ideas.
Soon Penta was tagged in and so was Matt. The pair exchanged chops, kicks, and dives as the other members of their respective trios joined in on the apron and on the floor next to you. When you looked back in the ring to check on Matt, your heart dropped into your stomach at what you saw — Penta had a hammer held high in the air and Matt was out of it, barley able to stay on his knees as Penta had a tight grip on his hair. You rushed into the ring and shoved Matt out of the way just in time. Unfortunately for you, you got struck with the hammer. Thankfully, it was on the wrist and not the head. You were grateful you were able to get your arms up over your head in time or things would have been a million times worse.
You couldn’t really hear the crowd react to what they just witnessed because your wrist was in excruciating pain. You went to try to get out of the ring quickly but you felt a pair of hands swiftly wrap around your waist and pull you out. You were in too much pain to care who it was, but upon hearing his voice, it was Kenny. He was calling for Doc Sampson to come check you out while Brandon was quickly by your side helping you make your way to the back.
Inside the ring, Matt was livid. He heard you yelp as the hammer made contact with your wrist and that’s what snapped him out of it, giving him extra adrenaline. His fight or flight response was to fight and protect you, like he always has. Matt didn’t waste any time yelling at Penta, getting up in his face, and absolutely rocking his shit. Matt was on fire the remainder of the match. Nick and Kenny were pissed too, but not like Matt, he was on a completely other level. Neither man had ever seen Matt this enraged before, now that they have, they don’t want to see it ever again. Matt’s already dark brown eyes looked almost pitch black, definitely a scary sight.
Back in Doc Sampson’s office, you were being looked at with Brandon by your side. You were going to have to go to the hospital for an X-ray so Doc can help you better. He guessed it was fractured or broken. You hoped it was the former. You begged Doc to let you wait for Matt, but much to your disappointment, he said it was best to go now —the sooner, the better. You signed, still clutching your wrist to your chest and reluctantly agreed. Brandon insisted on driving you and you didn’t put up a fight. You were ready to get this over with.
Once loaded up in Brandon’s rental car, you made the short drive over to the hospital. “Thanks for sticking with me. Can you let Matt know where we are? I love having you here for all this, but—”
“Already done. Don’t worry about it. I get it, it’s just not the same.” Brandon slid his phone back into his pants pocket after exiting the car and helping you, even though you didn’t really need it, you accepted the help anyways.
Finally inside and explained your situation to the receptionist, she pointed you in the right direction and it wasn’t before too long that Matt came racing in, Nick and Kenny hot on his heels. You could tell he had been through it but you weren’t sure if it was because of the match or because of you or both — most likely both. You were relieved to see Matt didn’t come alone. He was clearly in no position to drive.
Once Matt finally saw you, you saw the relief wash over his face. He moved so fast that it felt like he was across the room in three steps. “Baby! Baby, how long have you been here? When will they look at you? What’s—” He’s rapid fire questions were cut off by a nurse calling your name at the doorway to a hallway for those X-rays Doc Sampson ordered. Matt was quick to help you up, being cautious with your wrist you kept clutched to your chest. Again, you really didn’t need his help standing up, but you knew he was worried sick so, again, you accepted it.
“Follow me down the hall and we’ll get those X-rays done.” The nurse politely said as she led you and Matt down the hall. You felt Matt’s hand on your lower back, letting you know he’s there and guiding you. Glancing up at his face while you walked down the hall, you saw a range of emotions from worry to guilt to anger. You knew him well enough to know that he was worried about what the outcome of the X-rays would be, guilty that he was the reason you got hurt despite him knowing that he would have done the same had the roles been reversed, and anger because that damn hammer just had to be brought into the match, if it hadn’t you’d most likely be fine.
Nick, Kenny, and Brandon stayed in the waiting room talking about the situation. The three agreed that they needed to keep Matt occupied with you until the next match because he was a wild card at the moment, none of them knew what lengths he would go to for retaliation or what was going on in his mind. They just knew Matt needed to be with you, not just because they didn’t know what he would do to Penta but because Matt cared so deeply about you and loved you. The three had a feeling Matt would end up bugging the shit out of you with his overly protective attitude because you were an independent woman. The men also knew you would let him baby you regardless because you loved him and wanted him to do what he felt like was the best thing for you in times like this.
The X-rays were done and waiting for a doctor to come read them after consulting with Doc Sampson. The wait felt like forever. Matt was nervously bouncing his leg, a hand on yours. You didn’t know if that was meant to comfort you or ground and calm him. You had all you could take of the silence, turning to speak to Matt but you paused, studying his body language. Big brown eyes filled with worry, teeth biting at his bottom lip, leg still bouncing, his hand still on your thigh. He was way more nervous than you. Upon closer look, you noticed his eyes looked watery. This really bothered him more than you initially expected. “Matt…” You spoke softly, not wanting to startle him. Once his attention was on you, he slowed his leg to a stop and quit biting his lip, eyes still filled with worry. “It’s all going to be okay. My wrist doesn’t feel like it’s broken, at least I don’t think it does. Listen, regardless of what the X-ray says, I want you to take me home and you can play nurse to your heat’s content.” You lean up and place a soft kiss to his cheek. “But I expect you to be in uniform.” You whispered in a sultry voice into his ear. You saw how his face immediately turned red at your request. He wasn’t used to you saying things like that to him, especially in public.
A knock at the door was Matt’s saving grace. The doctor entered with the X-rays, taking a seat on the stool in the room by the computer. “Good news is your wrist is not broken. Bad news is that it’s fractured, but no surgery will be needed, just a brace should do until it’s fully healed. Also, as I’m sure you know, don’t be lifting anything with that hand.” You nodded along and felt Matt’s hand squeeze your thigh.
“Of course. Thank you.” You tell the doctor once he’s finished talking. Standing to leave, Matt nodded his head to the doctor. You weren’t sure why he wasn’t speaking until you noticed he was trying to keep his cool. He was still angry that you were hurt, thankful your wrist wasn’t broken, but still angry Penta had to use that damn hammer.
Once back out in the waiting room, you see Nick, Kenny, and Brandon chatting away while passing Nick’s phone back and forth. You didn’t know what they were looking at or talking about and you kind of didn’t want to know either because with those three it could be anything.
Their attention is taken away from Nick’s phone when they hear your footsteps approaching. Brandon goes to open his mouth to speak, but closes it as soon as he sees Matt’s face. Nick and Kenny see it too, opting to follow Brandon’s lead. “Well, it’s not broken, just fractured. Probably have to be out for a little bit but no surgery so that’s a relief.” You inform the trio, knowing they saw Matt’s face by the silence you received. “Let’s go home. Actually, let’s go eat. I’m starving.” And right on cue, your stomach let out a loud growl, eliciting a chorus of laughter from the guys.
Kenny and Nick join Brandon in his rental car, knowing that Matt would want you with him. They didn’t mind, they would want the same.
After your meal, everyone went their separate ways, embarking on their journey home. Nick would typically ride with you and Matt, but he knew his brother. Nick knew Matt would want to be alone with you after everything, to probably talk it out and what not, so Nick rode home with Brandon.
You managed to get Matt to lighten up and relax by putting on the silliest concert you could, signing at the top of your lungs, water bottle for a microphone, and dancing in your seat. Matt loved seeing you like that so much that he couldn’t help but smile and join in on the duets.
When you finally reached your shared home, Matt made you wait in the car until he got all your things inside the house, quick to return to you and assist you out of the car and into the house. Yep, this is going to get old real quick. You thought to yourself. You let Matt do those things, knowing he still felt guilty you were hurt trying to protect him.
“I’ll go run you a bath, just the way you like, candles, soft music, dim lights, and bubbles. I’ll have one of my shirts waiting for you and a fluffy towel to dry off with. And I—“ You pulled him down with your good hand, connecting his lips with yours. You were so happy that he cared so much to do all those things, but he was already driving you crazy.
Matt was stunned, freezing only for a moment before returning your kiss, only to increase the intensity. You knew what he was doing, and you weren’t having it, at least not right now. You abruptly pulled away from his addictive lips. “Nope! Not yet honey. I believe you mentioned a bath, besides you’re not even in uniform yet!” You teased, turning on your heel and heading towards the master bathroom. You chuckled as you heard Matt mutter a swear before chasing after you.
The bath was exactly as Matt described, candles, music, dim lights, bubbles, the fluffiest towel you own, and your favorite shirt of his. You were tempted to ask him to join you, he was a mixture of emotions and could definitely use some relaxing. “Matt! Come ‘ere! Come join me!” You shout from the tub, unsure where exactly in the house he was.
The second Matt heard you shout his name, he was on it. He didn’t listen to what else you might have said, he was worried you hurt yourself or your wrist even more on accident. Relief washed over his face when he ran into the bathroom, seeing you playing with the bubbles while quietly singing to a song on the playlist. “Oh thank God!” He exclaimed, ever so slightly out of breath. You turned your body just enough to see him hunched over in the doorway, confusion was etched on your face.
“You okay, babe?” It was your turn to be concerned for him. He nodded, too embarrassed to tell you why he ran from one end of the house to the other when you yelled. “Join me! Clearly you need to relax.” You teased him once again, gesturing to his still hunched over body.
“You know what, I think I will.” He winked, stripping his shirt off, the rest of his clothes following suit. He slipped in the bath behind you, letting out a content sigh as you leaned back against his bare chest. “Now I get why you love these so much.” He says, his eyes fluttering shut.
“Told you these baths were heaven.” You shut your eyes as well, soaking in the moment. A relaxing bath with your soon-to-be husband, this was the life.
After what felt like hours, you both took turns washing each other off before getting out and heading to bed. After such an eventful evening, nightfall came quick. You slipped into Matt’s shirt and your underwear while Matt slipped into some pajama pants, the pair of you were exhausted and ready for bed.
Matt pulled you into his arms once you both were in bed, careful with your fractured wrist as you snuggled into his chest. “I love you. Thank you for taking care of me today.” You said, softly, placing a kiss to his chest. You were so thankful and grateful to have Matt, someone to love you, take care of you, spoil you despite your protests, and support and respect you.
“I love you more, angel.” Matt placed a sweet kiss to the top of your head. If today and the next several weeks would teach him anything, it was that the two of you would be together through thick and thin. The diamond ring on your left hand proved it.
General Taglist: @legit9thlunaticwarrior @plentyoffandoms @1dluver13xx @sunshinevirus @wwenhlimagines @crowleysqueenofhell @jackson-nickthedate13
Matt Jackson Taglist: @mrsmatt
A/N: If you don’t feel comfortable with the Google form, you can let me know to add you to the taglist with an ask, message, or a comment!
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dollyyyhouse · 2 years
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This is the part two of my previous post, please read it for more context ʚɞ
WHAT THE HELL 😭⁉️ I didn't expect that post to get much attention but it got a lot more than I expected, tyyy everyone ^^ it makes me happy seeing all the sweet comments. I'll work harder to make you guys happy! 💪
Major TWs for : Mentions + implications of suicide, self harm, trauma and body horror!!!
Slight spoilers for Lesson 16!
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A loud boom came from outside of the House of Lamentation, one that would never be heard by the nearby residents. A gruesome and pitiful sight was displayed, your distorted body laid close by a balcony. The plummet killed you instantly, when your head and chest made contact with the hard ground; your protective bones shattered, allowing your major organs to fail not long after.
Despite the noise you had made, the brothers who were still in the dining room were too busy arguing to notice the commotion. Nobody chased after you, nobody went to look for you, nobody even tried messaging you to see where you had run off to— too busy with inner and family turmoil. "You scumbag! You were supposed to watch over MC during their stay," insults began to spew out of some of the brother's mouths; true hell was soon to break out unbeknownst to them.
Only after what seemed like hours of arguing that one by one, the brother's began to split up in hopes of getting some peace and quiet. All of them were in too much shock to think about where you were, they could only think about the look of terror on your face and your words. The twins headed to their room, most of the others did besides two. Lucifer and Mammon refused to head to bed, Lucifer went to his study and began working; silently praying it would distract him from everything that occurred. Mammon stormed out of the house, deciding it was best to take some fresh air before going into town to do some shopping.
While walking around the House of Lamentation, he could see a large group of crows pecking at something. Much to his annoyance, he headed over to shoo them away. When he realized what— who he was looking at, he could only stare in shock for a brief moment before releasing a blood curdling scream.
The others thought that perhaps it was Mammon being punished by Lucifer again, but when the screaming didn't quiet down after awhile they left their rooms to see what was terrorizing the Avatar of Greed so much. Once all of them had arrived at the scene, Mammon was at a loss for words and everyone else could only stare in horror and shock. Even the eldest couldn't manage to calm everyone down, let alone himself.
The dress that was carefully crafted to mimic Lilith's clothing was torn, covered in blood along with other indescribable things. The body you once took good care of was now covered in scratches; all done by you in order to convince everyone and everything that you weren't Lilith, and that you were no longer going to be a doll forced to play the part of the fallen angel.
Like a trance, the despairing emotions consumed you in such a short amount of time, not allowing you to think about everything you had to lose. But what did you have to lose? The brother's didn't think of you as MC, demons at RAD disliked you, you were in an entire different realm— no family or friends to talk to, even if your friends back in the human realm were searching for you, it wasn't like they could ever find you in the Devildom. You unknowingly lost everyone you cared for in the past, you didn't even know if they were searching for you; maybe they didn't even realize your sudden disappearance.
You already lost the people of your past, a past that sometimes you wished you could go back to, because comparing to the short life you've lived in Devildom— your life in the human realm seemed like a cup of tea comparing to everything happening now.
In the moments you were alone, the moments where you could take off the replica dress and think for yourself; all you could dream of was to rest in peace after months of mental and physical torment caused to you by the brothers. Never in your wildest dreams or most horrifying nightmares, you'd think you'd be kidnapped by demons— only to die again and again. But now, after experiencing the most traumatic things in your life— the suicide of yourself seemed much better than having your throat crushed by one of the Avatars of Hell.
Nobody knew what would happen to you, not even Lucifer or the Lord. Nobody knew if you'd be given another chance at life, to be doomed to roam the halls of the HOL as a ghost, or to rest in a grave. You wanted to live, you truly did, but not if you were going to suffer for so much of it. As beautiful as happy memories are, they can easily be tainted no matter who you shared them with.
The crisis of not truly knowing who you had become, the toll taken on your mental and physical state of always having to mimic someone you never knew had become too much to bare. You wanted to please all of them, but the satisfaction of seeing them smile never came. You knew all along they never saw you as MC, only seeing Lilith in a different form; even if you didn't want to admit it. But in a moment of distress, you failed to see the other possibilities whether you lived or not.
@xiaopleasecomehome @shan-jia-mo-li @lonely-dreamer @sweettooth-87 @hopeluna @shan-jia-mo-li @that-very-tired-writer0 @12am-motivation @wiltedros3s @akira-likes-to-read
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freakingxloser · 25 days
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Mickey Altieri - nsfw alphabet
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Mickey will definitely help you to get clean and cuddle with you afterwards. Will talk about it for sure, ask you if you are okay and if you enjoyed it as well. But that’s gonna happen only if you guys are actually dating and he cares about you. If you are a random one night stand just for his pleasure, he would just get dressed and leave, not giving a damn about how you feel. 
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
His favorite body part on himself is definitely gonna be his arms. He is aware of his strength (we all saw how he yeeted the girl out of the balcony lmao). Knows how to use it while killing and in his love life as well, holding you in place, or grabbing you by your hips and pulling you closer, wrapping his arms around your body…All about them. 
When it comes to you, I can definitely see that Mickey is a fan of thighs. Loves to see them jiggle, while your whole legs are shaking after a rough session of yours. Mickey loves to play with them, grab on them…or having his head buried in-between them…
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Mickey loves to cum inside you, doesn’t matter if it’s your mouth or your pussy…but actually prefers more to cum in your mouth. It’s the best way to avoid any kind of pregnancy scares plus he absolutely loves when you swallow his load, praises you for it afterwords. He enjoys the view of having his cum spilled all over your tongue. He 
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
Mickey is extremely jealous and possessive. He hates when other guys even look at you. Doesn’t hesitate to even kill them if they dare to talk to you or even worse…touch you. That drives him absolutely crazy, so he just kills them. Then he may or may not use the same knife during your knife play sessions. 
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
I mean…Mickey is on college. I don’t think he has a lots of experience, but definitely slept with some girls before…so I would just day that he definitely knows what he’s doing. 
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Doggy for sure. Mickey loves to pound you from behind, the sound when his hips hit your ass, loves to slap your ass or grabbing you by your hair while he mercilessly thrusts into you. Or even surprise you with fingering your ass while already destroying your pussy…you’ll never know. 
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
He definitely doesn’t crack jokes, but will definitely mock you if you cannot even form a proper words during your session. 
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
Mickey definitely keeps himself trimmed down there. But not shaved completely. If you make him do it, be prepared for lots of bitching about it being itchy and uncomfortable. 
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Don’t expect any rose petals or candles, that’s not his thing. Mickey will shower you praises, having a slow sensual missionary with you, having an eye contact with you or his lips never leaving yours, but not any stereotypical romantic shit. 
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
He doesn’t jack off when he has you. Why would he? He simply grabs you and fucks you whenever he wants to. Even when he needs you immediately. He will drag you into an empty classroom and bend you over the desk if he really needs it. No needs to masturbate if it’s that easy, right? 
K = Kinks
My man is definitely into blood and knife play. None can tell me otherwise. Consensual non consent is on his mind really often as well. Would absolutely love to just sneak into your room and take you there without saying a word. Mickey is also for sure into somnophilia, it only makes sense imo. And I think Mickey is really into menophilia, he likes period sex and it absolutely drives him crazy, when he can go down on you during your period. Even when you protest, the little sparkle in his eyes when he suggests so makes you allow it to him. He goes really wild down there, licking all of the blood, sucking on your clit, fingering you…licking his fingers clean afterwards, yep…that definitely sounds like Mickey. 
L =  Location (favorite places to do the do)
He definitely prefers your or his bedroom, doesn’t like public places with a risk of getting caught. Mickey doesn’t want anyone to see your beautiful body, that’s why. When he really needs to fuck you during classes, he makes sure all the door are secured and none can actually get in. 
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Basically anything you wear, that at least a little reveals your thighs turns him on. Or when you walk around your room just in your shirt and underwear when he visits you…yep honey, you won’t get him off of you for hours. Also when he sees that you are needy, he is immediately ready to take you…of course you won’t avoid any teasing, of course he would mock you, tease your clit for ages, not allowing you to cum at first, but no worries, he would make you cum several times after he is done with teasing and mocking. 
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Mickey is okay with blood, cum or saliva. But other body fluids? Hell no. That’s a big no for him. 
O =  Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) 
He enjoys both, giving and receiving. Of course he enjoys having you on your knees, seeing you playing with his tip in your mouth and sucking on him…and once he has enough of you just playing around forcing his cock deeper in your mouth and making you gag on it, making your eyes all teary is something he could do 24/7. But going down on you, sucking on your clit, licking you, making you cum numerous times just with his mouth is something that brings him pleasure as well. (Especially during your period, but loves to do it even when you’re not.) 
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
As we read many times above, Mickey loves it rough and merciless. But our man gets that it’s not just about the speed, but also about the force. He can also have a slow, sensual session with you, but that doesn’t happen often, it’s really rare. 
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Mickey likes to take his time with you, but if you both are under a time pressure, he is up to it. 
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
If he has some interesting fantasy, he will for sure include it in your sex life, at least for once. When it comes to taking risk then no, he definitely doesn’t want you to get caught, he doesn’t want anyone else to see your beautiful body. And when it comes to pregnancy risks, also no. He makes sure that you are on the pill or has a plan b ready for you…but spilling his cum all over your tongue is just as satisfying, so he tends to do that more to avoid the risk. 
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Mickey is a college dude, of course he can fuck like a rabbit. All the time and each round gets longer and longer. He can fuck you for hours, until you feel tired and cannot take it anymore. But he would definitely continue after you falling asleep (with your consent, if he loves/likes you…if you are just a random girl, well…he won’t bother with consent).
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
I cannot see Mickey using a big variety of them, but ropes, handcuffs or anal toys that he would use on you? Hell yeah. But from what he could deduce from the movie…I can positively say that his fav “toy“ is a knife…
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Oh, Mickey would tease the shit out of you…especially if you were teasing him whole day at school. He won’t stop until you beg him to finally do something. But this motherfucker loves to hear you beg, so…it’s gonna take you a lot of begging until he actually gives you what you want. 
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Mickey is not really loud, just when he gets closer and closer to his orgasm. Of course there is a lot of heavy breathing going on, but more he focuses on those lovely noises you make. Mickey absolutely loves to hear you moan or whimper, or hearing your little sobs while you are overstimulated and cannot take it anymore…oh he would die for those. 
W =  Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Mickey wants to know everyone that you are his. He is for sure obsessed with you. So because of that, he leaves marks on you. Sometimes its just random bites or hickeys on you neck, other days it’s bruises…or his name craved into your skin. Loves to just carve his name into your thighs or ass and lick your bloody wounds clean, since his obsession with blood is slightly getting out of hand too. 
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
I think Mickey is slightly above average, definitely thicker… definitely pleasurable. 
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Mickey has a HIGH sex drive, okay? Probably not higher than desire to go on a killing spree, but still…Mickey would fuck whole day every day if he could. Sometimes during weekends he just refuses to let you leave the bed. When you get up after one round of lazy morning sex, thinking that you’re gonna have as shower and then do something productive, but Mickey is already behind you, making sure you have the right company in the shower, playing with your pussy, gently rubbing your clit, before pushing you against the shower wall and pounding into you again…I do not need to tell you what happens after shower, right?
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
As I said before…If he cares about you, he will make sure that you’re okay, cuddle with you, talk to you and then fall asleep. But If he doesn’t, he just passes out or leaves you immediately. 
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enha-doodles · 1 year
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Hi
Can I request Yandere sadistic Jay when his s/o tries to kill herself to escape from him, like instead of treating her sweeter it can be worse, not treating her cuts or wounds, punishing her for trying to leave.
IDK i feel like Jay may be the type of literally dress her s/o like a princess and spoiling her buying her expensive things just to show her like a doll, but I feel he's really sadist with her during punishment, also the type of not giving a shit about her feelings
“ MISTER SADIST ”
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Pairing : jayxreader! Genre : yandere and a bit of fluff? Warning : yandere behaviour , su3ide attempt, sadist Jay , not proofread
A/n : heyy anon , here is your request. Hope you like it and tbh I get where you are coming from . I think he is mostly likely to be the sadist out of all 7 members .
Disclaimer : I don't support any yandere behaviours . This is all a work of fiction and my imagination . Credits of the GIFs to the owners . None of the members have the same personality or resonate the traits mentioned below .
This is not how you wanted your escape to be , neither did you wanted to be get caught one feet away from the balcony . Just a feet away from freedom . It had been 2 months .... 2 months since he kept you in his house , 2 months away from your family , 2 months away from your friends, 2 whole months you have been locked in that shitty room which some would call a heaven but it was simply a prison for you . You were sick of this , so so sick that you had came up with a plan to finally escape . It was more risky than the ones you tried before but you weren't sure if you would stay sane if you continued to live like this . Jay loved you yeah but that jerk was a complete sadist . He loved punishing you , any minor inconvenience and the guy would be angry. The tears on your face were diamonds for him to collect and keep , it satisfied him knowing how you know your place or what consequences you would have to go through if you disobeyed him . You somehow managed to find a sleeping pill by rummaging through his room when he was in the shower . You weren't sure if it was expired or not but even if it was , it wasn't like you cared . It will do the job . You quickly went and added the crushed up pill into his drink . When he came out of the shower he saw you walking up to your room with a tense expression and it seemed as if you didn't notice him . He wasn't stupid , he knew you did something but watching you so tense was doing something to him , he wanted to see your oh so happy expression crush right down Infront of him . So he pretended to faint after he saw the smoky substance in his drink . You checked up on him and relief washed over you when you saw the monster himself knocked out on the dining table . You went up to the balcony , you weren't going to run . NO . It was too much complicated and you knew he would find you , you just wanted freedom so you decided to end your life by jumping from the 5 floored hell . While breaking the lock you managed to get a few cuts here and then but your body will soon be filled with a lot of bruises so it didn't matter . But just a step away from jumping you felt a hand grab your hair from behind and you knew you were fucked , it could be none other than Jay . Hell yeah you were right , you were face to face with an evily grinning Jay , the sight only causing extreme fear in you which caused a waterfall right down your eyes . "Aww why are crying ? Didn't you know what will happen if you try to leave me ?" "Jay hear me out-" he just laughed "you are so stupid , god it's adorable . But you aren't getting out of this just bcoz you are cute hmm?" With this he dragged you down to your room harshly , his grip only making more bruises. You would think he would bandage you first, just to take care of his love but no , he was enjoying you whimpering in pain . "Get ready to scream because I give no mercy sweetheart " he gave you the charming smile while his hand held a knife . "After this you will know not to run or jump away anywhere" .
Taglist : @axartia @nikipedia07 @lovesickxmina
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