#you havent said a word since

[the-kipsabian]

if something tho, i have gotten better about writing just to share with one person and just enjoying creating that way so. thats very nice

#especially since ngl seeing how badly my clicks have tanked on both sites kinda unmotivates me a lot so. being able to do this helps #like said i wrote almost 20k words last month but only got 12k posted on ao3. even less here #sooooo liiiiike. idk what this means going forward #it just feels very nice to have a writer friend who cares about what i do and who i can share stuff with and throw ideas around and whatnot #it just feels nice. i havent had that in a long time and its honestly motivating me a lot more than thinking about posting shit anywhere atm #i get to share and i get shared with and yeah. just posting in private feels so much nicer #it has little to do with the stuff i write too tbh so. yeah #idk where this post was going im eepy #the point is i wrote 2.3k words tonight and they are enjoyed where they should and it makes me happier than posting them so ✌️ #if you dont get fics much from me anymore you know what happened lol #night is an absolute mess on main

[lollytea]

Amazing how huntlow manages to do the absolute most and yet never fucking talk to each other

#you think this is a complaint but tis not. an observation if anything #its kinda funny #not a single word was directly exchanged between the two of them in todays episode #and they BARELY talked in labyrinth runners. you could argue that there was no mutual interaction in that ep either #willow said like one or two things to him #while hunter could not manage a single word #disaster hunter hc that they havent had a proper one-on-one convo since before hollow mind #from back when they were texting so talking was a lot easier #like he HAS talked to her plenty since LR but only feels comfortable if gus is there too #hunter is very insistent that gus be present at all times so he wont be left alone with her #the few times it happened he was exposed as not knowing how the fuck to talk to her #but like insane. they never talk and yet you never doubt for a second that they care about each other. A LOT #huntlow

[vulturereyy]

THEY'RE DOING FUCKING WHAT FOR A CROWN OF CANDY????

#literally pissing and shitting myself rn #yall dont even know ive never said on here but d20 aCoC is literally like #the entire reason i started being more confident in my D&D games and i actually started trying character voices #like you can see a notable shift in our session recordings from when i started watching it #i mean u cant bc i dont post them lmfao #but there is a very clear line #is my voice for sorbet 'good' ??? not really but you know what i got over my fears bc of d20 #literally my favorite d&d thing i have ever watched and one of the only ones ive ever been able to get through all the way #like i was HOOKED #i'm going to lose it #i hope its just as good #but also worried because what draws me to d20 vs cr is the vibes the group brings and how it's very very good but not . 'cinematic'? #that may be the wrong word #i also havent watched cr since like season 2 besides clips so i admit i may be wrong dont come for me #but i am really looking forward to this amethar was my favorite #crying screaming frowing up #im going to be so normal about this #a crown of candy #dimension 20

[horrorwebs]

fucking hell fucking hell is she gonna reject me? i want to let sth out for a second and didnt want to tell my psychologist until i have answers so. tags it is

#so. i told my friend i like her. i really really do you cant imagine how much. this was while i was away on a trip last week and we were #messaging.honestly i wanted to be brave enough to tell her in person but i tried already and i was tired of waiting for 'the perfect moment #i was tired of not doing anything ever and watching my life go by. so i drann a bit and told her. not bc i was a bit drunk thats just an #excuse. i was plenty conscious and still scared as fuck (so much that after i sent the message i took a lap around the building lol) #she said i should be scared first. then that she wasnt sure what to say. in her words 'more yes than no. but i dont know what to say' #understandable. she prob wasnt expecting it and its not amazing to have a conversation like that through text (despite the fact that our #relationship has always relied heavily on texting cause weve always stayed up talking. like from day 1) #anyway. she said that before we met she had a crush on me (i already knew this) and that she sometimes felt this way too wbut was scared i #didnt feel that way as well and didnt wanna risk anything so didnt do anything (granted. but she DID say plenty of ambiguous things + #told me i could sleep w her then um. slept on top of me. hugging. you know) #my friend said this was a good sign i was nervous and told her that i thought it was weird and she said her response was p good #and later she uploaded on her cf story a video that said a ring she shares w me is her 'married ring' so i think thats good?? #but also. we havent talked yet (hard to do in 15 min at school) and i have a bad fweling #i feel shes going to say sth like she likes me but doesnt want to risk what we have esp considering her other friends sometimes treat her #badly/exclude her and that shes worried if we fight we are going to lose our friendship + shes going to lose my friends as well #which is well. stupid of course. because i always want her in my life. i think she knows this. i want her to know this. #ever since we met i want her in my life and i cant stop thinking about her and how i miss her and her eyes and how she hugs me and GOD #THE OTHER DAY WHEN WE SAW EACH OTHER AFTER I WENT ON A WEEK LONG TRIP SHE FUCKIN. LIFTED ME OFF THE GROUND AND. CARRIED ME AROUND #HONESTLY IT WAS A BIT EMBARASSING THERE WERE LOTS OF PPL SRIUND AND IM A VERY PRIVATE PERSON BUT I WAS SO HAPPY !!!! #and idk i just dont want her to reject me. shes the first person i really like and i see myself together with. we have so much in common an #we understand each other and we are GOOD for each other. shes so good for my life and i want to believe i am as awell and god how i #want to kiss her and call her my girlfriend and just. agh #its exhausting liking someone huh #loveposting #spikeposting #if anyone has read this far omg hi thank you what do you think?

[pettyprocrastination]

I think the most stressful part of it all is that I dont even know what she looks like. 

I never bothered looking her up, or trying to at least. A person like that, who was willing to break up a family by pursuing a married man wasn’t worth my time. I didn’t need to know her face. I knew her name and the type of woman she was, the type who only cared about herself, even putting her selfish needs before her own six year old daughter. 

 I was too focused on my mother, helping her, consoling her. Telling her that none of it was her fault. Just people talking about it is enough to send her into a panic attack, random assholes walking up to us in the fucking fruit aisle of walmart saying “are you **’s wife?” meant the rest of the day will be spent at home comforting her. I’ve done everything I can to keep that woman out of my mother’s mind for near two years, and she’s doing better because of it. 

But whenever I see a woman stare at me or my mother for a little too long I get nervous, before getting angry. I wonder if it’s her and what I should do. If i have enough time to find an excuse to quickly leave with my mom in hand before she realizes. I spend the rest of the day mulling over the hypothetical. What will I do if it does happen? The town is small enough that it could happen, and may eventually, and truthfully I don’t know what I will do when it comes. 

#tj talks #personal vent you can all ignore #im just...in a bit of a headspin atm #there was a new skater at practice last sunday who kept staring at me and part of me is like its nothing but another part of me is like #what if its her #if it is ill have to drop the league because I refuse to be in the same room as that woman unless im breaking her jaw #realistically i know it isnt but now im stressed #and trying to figure out a way to find out what her name is for peace of mind #been dizzy from this since sunday and havent said a word about it because im not pulling my mom under for this #i know its nothing i know its fine but jesus fucking christ if its her #i need to find out before my mother visits me at practice #so i can drop the league and tell that woman to go die in a hole #anyways #really fucking sucks kinda wanna cry #nothing has even happened yet but im just prepsred for the worst

[the-moon-dealer]

.

#thats not healthy #I was about to cry and just said to myself “man up” #like I'm feeling so suffocated by everything lately and dont really have anyone to talk to #I have my friends but some ive been “ghosting” for months and dont really feel like “hey you haha i havent responded in months haha” #So just no #family wont happen lol #its just the feeling of being alone all the time #I can reach friends for games hear their problems and help it #but I dont really feel like sharing because I thinks their problems are way bigger so i just dont #so here I am holding my crying for a whole year without saying a word to anyone because “man up” #so thats what I can do lol #come here on my 15 yo blog to say how I feel #I dont really feel like the things are right #everything is wrong #nothing right about myself or my life #same goes to work lol #like im looking for a job rn and the email i got this morning was basically like #“hey we love the resume and videos but we dont think you fit in since you have a major and all the other papers so yeah youre too good”

[shimp-heaven]

#want him. badly. miyoni akita my beloved #hes $15 and $15 too expensive for us rn lol but hopefully ill be able to get him soon!!! #i have a snaps application so maybe thatll help ease the financial burden a little bit #im home from the hospital btw. worst 28 hours of my life #there was a guy screaming at the nurses and calling them the n word and the t slur and threatening to attack ppl #i wasnt allowed to close my door and this happened in the room next to mine #they eventually had to sedate him #but it was bad even leaving that part out #they said they gave me a medication they never did #they never called my mental health team like at all. libby had to tell my therapist i was in the hospital #theyre supposed to keep you a minimum of 72 hours but let me go next day #the only book that wasnt like the last book in a series that i havent read was fucking nuts #had two graphic suicides in the first chapter then had child r*pe in it like graphically #i didnt really go watch the tv in the lobby cause of that guy #so i sat in a tiny room with no windows and just laid there #the first psychiatrist i saw was evil like questioned all my diagnosis and told me i shouldnt have ptsd from chikdhood issues #like it shouldnt still be effecting me #she also tried to take away my plushie but the nice nurses stood up for me so i got to keep moonmoon with me #ive been really not myself since i got out #ive been really angry and short tempered #i have nightmares about being in a cage #if im being completely honest i almost think i feel worse now then i did before #but im just going to keep it all to myself cause i never ever want to go back #so if anyone asks im feeling much better and im perfectly fine :) lol

[mrfoox]

Team: accidentally flirts with people and give them the wrong idea/get myself into spicy situations I wasn't prepared for

#miranda talking shit #Its bc i think its a joke. I cant seriously see anyone being intrested with me #So i can talk big... But then someone acts and im like bro.... You actually want to touch me? #What the fuck.....? Hsjfmmvlslskf and then idk hkw to act or react #Bc at one hand its nice but im not prepared and then i can end up in situations im not actually ok with #Im apperantly great at (fake) flirting. Im used to doing it and have since i was 13 but the older i get the more i realize #I shouldn't do it ... To me it's fun man. The few times i can seem confident and say shit is when i think its a joke #As soon as shit gets REAL i freak out bc it goes against my beliefs. Why would you want to touch me? Im hideous #But then again i do kinda enjoy starting shit... Or rather. Ill push others to start shit #The amount of times ive said things bc i want to see others reactions are too many... I #Am so into people's reactions i love them. As long as theyre not negative then yeah too bad #My autism is at play again i believe... I just want to see reactions and faces and hear voices that arent the normal ones #I always give strong af reactions but havent met anyone who gives them back so i get anything im like 👀! #I really start shit with words but wont ever do so with action bc then i can step over lines man #Only time it worked when i really wanted it to but assumed it wouldn't was with oliver #I really wasnt going to do anything but then i saw him acting different so i was like (: lets see what happens if i say this! #And then i blush and get embarrassed bc he escalated it. I would have loved to get that situation back bc it was so fun

[evie-sturns]

𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐱 - 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐨

summary: matt's been showing you less attention recently, all your emotions hit you at once while your alone in your apartment, but matt shows up.

contains: fluff (a lot), smut (matt the munch), crying, swearing.

-----------------------°°••....••°°----------------———-

it's been 2 days since matt's reached out, he hasn't texted, called, not a single word from him. 2 days isn't that long, but he's been distant lately.

i'm laying alone in my bed, the house is empty and obnoxiously silent. whenever i'm alone my emotions get the best of me, i hate crying in front of people.

i roll over, my eyes flick up to the time, 11:47pm. i let out a deep sigh as i see an Instagram notification appear.

'matthew.sturniolo made a post'

i click on it, liking it as i scroll through the mutiple pictures, its him ,nick, and this other girl ive never seen before. my heart sinks as i see his hand, which seems to be holding her hip.

"what the fuck.." i groan, wiping my eyes, everything makes alot more sense now.

everything hits at once, i feel the tears start, after a few seconds it turns into sobbing, my mascara streaking down my face.

abrubtly the door to my room creaks open, i slam my phone down, launching my body up.

its matt.

i instantly lie back down, rolling my body over so my back faces the door. "hey y/n!!" he says, unaware.

he turns on the light, i pull my blanket up over my head, holding my breath as i try to slow the tears, it doesnt work, instead a loud sob escapes my mouth.

i hear matt pause before he speed walks over to my side of the bed, he pulls the blankets off of my face, im met with his face, worry painted across his face.

"oh fuck, are you okay sweetheart?" he says, cupping my face with his hands as he leans over me bed.

"go away matt." i say in between crys.

he places a kiss to my forehead before walking over to the other side of my bed, crawling in next to me.

"matt i said go away-" i say, raising my voice but he cuts me off.

"shh.. i know i know" he says, wrapping a hand arounds my waist and tugging me close to him. "talk to me please." he says, anxiety clear in his voice.

i cuddle close to his side, laying my head under his armpit as i drape a thigh over his. he rubs my arm as he waits for me to answer.

"you havent.. talked to me.. in 2 days." i say in between sobs. i feel matt tense under me, "i know, youve been on my mind the whole time but ive been unbearably busy, you know i love you gorgeous." he says shakily,

"don't lie matt!" i raise my voice.

"y/n, stop it please." he says, his voice stern.

"no!" i yell, matt holds me close to him as i try to move away from him. his grip firm, but not painful on me.

"you were holding her!" i shout, matt's eyebrows furrow.

"y/n, who. who was i holding."

"that girl in your post." i mumble with a deep sigh.

"who, cassie? that's nates little sister, you know Nathan." matt closes his eyes as he plants a kiss in my hair.

i go silent, feeling slightly humiliated. "oh." i say, my voice breaking.

"can i show you how much i love you." he whispers, playing with my bra strap. i nod as matt pulls my blanket off me.

when matt and i usually hook up, we both put in equal effort, but matts made it very clear he doesnt want me to do anything.

"get comfortable," he says, slowly pulling down my sweat shorts until they bunch at my ankles. he taps my hip, signalling for me to lift it up, i comply, raising my torso off the bed. matt places a pillow under my lower back.

"you ready?" he asks softly, maintaining eye contact. "y-yes.. please."

matt spreads my legs, positioning his head between my legs, he places gentle kisses on my inner thighs, getting closer to my heat each time, i feel goosebumps form on my body as he places a light kiss on my clit, which is covered by my panties.

he reaches his palm to my legs, spreading them further. "good girl," he says, his breath hitting my inner thighs. he reaches his two finger up, pulling my panties to the side. he blows out cold air directly onto my clit.

a soft moan escapes my mouth.

he licks a stripe from my hole to my clit, i move my body into his mouth, desperate for more, his noses brushing against my pelvic bone. he grabs my hip with his spare hand, reaching two fingers down and teasing me.

"please!" i whine, squirm slightly, he grips onto my hip tighter before pressing two fingers inside of me. "oh my fuck.." i groan as he slowly pumps his fingers in and out of me.

i throw my head back, reaching my hand down and interlocking my hands with his hair. his mouth attaches to my clit, a desperate moan exiting my mouth as he continues to curl his fingers inside of me.

"im gonna c-" i whine, gripping his hair tighter, i clench around his fingers, releasing. matt slowly pulls his fingers out of me as he raises his head up, looking at me. his cheeks are flushed, a small amount of white painted on his cheek.

he places on last peck on my sensitive clit, before wiping his face. "you okay?" he asks, his voice barely audible as i catch my breath. "yeah.." i mumble, "thank you matt".

matt gets out of bed, walking over to my side of the bed and picking me up, cradling me as he walks us into his bathroom. "you're perfect ya know?" matt says, turning on the bath. after a few minutes he places me down in the tub, his hand on the back of my head so i don't hit my head.

he sits on the edge of the bath, still trying to wipe his face clean.

"im sorry matt."

"what no, its fine i like it?" he says defensivley.

"no, im not talking about the mess i made on your face, im sorry for yelling at you earlier."

——-----------------°°••....••°°---------------------——

#sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #sturniolo smut #sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x reader #sturniolo triplets #nick sturniolo #chris sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #matt sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo fluff

[vixensajntz]

ghostfacechosoxblackchubbyfemreader.facefucking.backshots.reader wears glasses.mask kink.stangers to lovers.they fuck in a bathroom at a halloween party.babbling.tounge piercing mentioned.choso is vocal.

THINKING ABOUT GHOSTFACE CHOSO FUCKING YOU AT A HALLOWEEN PARTY:

You been with him ever since youve been at the party,you looking so good in your costume…it was slutty,skimpy,and perfect.You never knew it would lead to you getting slutted out in a secluded bathroom by a total stanger within the sorority house but you weren’t totally mad about it.Seeing him in that ghostface mask after grinding with him on the dance floor for all that time rose something within you to drag him to the bathroom,pull up his mask to reveal him and see the bottom half of his face…his thick pink plump lips decorated with those black snake bite piercings…making you crave to feel them on your lips which did happen,his lip gliding with yours beautifully…tounges sliding together feeling his the sliver ball of his tounge piercing exploring your mouth had really gotten to you.

Now he has you bent over the bathroom counter,your red skirt pulled up to your waist…your red lace thong pulled to the side…his thick length going in and out of your warmth so well…your creamy essence making strings everytime his plevis collides with your ass…seeing a recoil everytime he slams back…your holding onto that bathroom counter for dear life…your long sleeve pulled up showing your perfect titties to him in the mirror,hes been watching your facial expressions very closely and finds them quite beautiful.You only wish that you could see his but the sounds hes making is fullfilling your wishes…his whimpers and whines being echoed within the mask…you would think he would be the quiet type with the way hes been handling you all night but were you wrong.You feel your release coming in strong and he knows it too with the way your choking his dick over and over again…he just cant get enough and neither can you…youve been babbling with the way his length has been hitting the spongey spot over and over again…tears streaming down your face having your falsies get wet but you could care less rn…youre a slobbering mess and choso fuckin loves it.Your black framed glasses getting fogged up same with the mirror with your heavy pants…’f-fuck imma cumm’ you said with a gutterual whine after he hit you with a harder thrust.’i know baby i know,i want you to cum on this dickk’he said with a string of cruses.The more he keeps thrusting within you the more you go dumb…you never had dick like this before and you havent even gotten his name or what he looks like under that mask.That release is on the tip on your tounge ready to fall off all you needed was those words ‘come on cum on me,i want it right now’he said with a small chuckle…your release finally falls off your tounge jumping into the abyss…your eyes rolling into the back of your head…your face contorted into the most beautiful thing hes ever seen…with the loudest harmonious cry ever heard.Him feeling the pulse made him almost release,quickly pulling out of you pushing you on the floor…you post orgasmic still rushing within you when you open your eyes facing his pink tip having your creamy substance…looking up to him with your siren eyes…giving him a nod that it was okay…him pushing you towards his dick,your mouth engulfing him in…you tasting yourself…him fucking your face making you gag every once in a while…hes letting out these heavy pants…you feel him twitching in your mouth…hes getting close…your warm mouth is really having him in a daze while looking down at you…hearing him mutter ‘shittt’ feeling his thick seed shoot into your throat,you swallowing ever drop of the salty but tasteless nut down your throat with a smile.This might be the best night youve ever had.

tags} @hqkalon @honeybleed @br4tphobia @niyahlovesu @zarihaaa +send an ask if you wanna be added.

©yeagerzprettyblnt 2023$!dont steal,plagiarize my shit,steal themes,or repost my works anywhere else without asking.if you do you will have conquences.

#choso x black reader #jjk choso smut #choso x you #choso x y/n #kamo choso #choso smut #choso kamo #choso x reader #jujutsu kaisen choso #jjk choso #jjk #jjk x black!reader #jjk smut #choso x female reader #jjk choso x black y/n #jjk x chubby reader

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

Over here, laying in bed, wondering why the thought of driving is making me hyperventilate. Realized I haven't taken my anxiety meds today. Whoops.

#the wack thing is. i just recently started taking my anxiety meds (again) #they were prescribed months ago but they made my blood pressure too low (fun side effect) and didnt help my anxiety much #but a few months later my anxiety was getting almost out of control so i decided to try again #and its been magnificent. now im just hyper aware of having to keep my blood pressure up #but its been so nice. i havent been nearly as anxious and its made life so much easier #i used to have terrible anxiety about driving. for forever but especially since i was in an accident #and these meds reallllly helped. i havent had that anxiety since i started taking my meds again #whovh is why i was so confused when i wanted to go grocery shopping and started panicking at the thought of driving #its not a good time #i want to make chicken quesadillas but i need to go to the store. but the thought of driving rn is terrifying #but i need to drive to get to the store. and i need to get to the store. because i want quesadillas #okay unrelated but i just remembered: my best friend is dating another friend of mine and its very new #so im getting a constant flow of tea and screenshots and i love it. today my best friend (bf) sent me a screenshot from a convo last night #in which they were talking about cheese. and the friend (not bf. jesus i hate that they have the same name) #(oh did i forget to mention they have the same name? yeah. anyway my best friend is bf and the other is just friend i guess) #anyway they were talking about cheese and friend says they dont like it. mostly the smell. and compared eating cheese to eating ketchup #they called cheese a condiment. i know they meant it in a 'i wont eat cheese on its own' kind of. but they said the words 'its a condiment' #thats what i was focusing on when my bf texted me the screenshot. apparently he didnt care and instead wanted me to see that #friend had texted 'goodnight love' whoch my bf was freaking out about because 'love' is a gateway to 'i love you'' #i wasnt paying attention to that because i call everyone 'love' and tbh friend probably picked up that habit from me #i call friend (and everyone) hon or dear or love all the time. i mean it platonically. bf uses it romantically #but again. im pretty sure friend and i use it in the same way. so it was funny to see bf freak out about this #saying 'its a gateway to i love you and im not ready for that!' when in my mind calling someone love is like calling them dude #not to downplay my lovely bf's pain but like. theyre both cute. very cute together. i love this relationship. i love being in the middle #im close with both of them so i get questions and cute rants and shit from both. theyre on a date rn! #so im gonna hear all about it tonight. but i had to start my day by reading 'cheese is a condiment' which was less than ideal tbh #okay. gonna go try to drive to the store. i really want quesadillas. ill bribe myself with ice cream #i got this

[mimiri22-6]

💗💗💗💗

#and the universe said 'i will love you forever' #i realy wanba say sonething but i have no words #no words that i know everyone already feels #we all know our woeds and this feeling happening right now #but some of us just cand voice it #.......we love you too #technoblade #we love you too #thannk you slo fucking much for being one of my biggrdt inspirations #i've thought of you everytime ive posred a video #im soerry for not being able to get thst techno merch when it was out. cards are weird #and im sorry for all the spelling mistakes mr english major. i fucked up my hand at the parj tonight...i havent stopped shaking since i #goy the news....

[nejiverse]

ETERNALLY

Gojo Satoru

In which Gojo’s eyes are always on you. He may have a staring problem. Fem! Reader

ik i havent written on here in FOREVER but ive been working on my wriothesley book on wattpad lol

410 words

Gojo was always looking at you. It was something you noticed ever since you two got married.

At first you thought it was just a coincidence that whenever your eyes would meet, he'd just so happen to be looking your way already.

But you found that this wasn't the case.

The lovesick gaze he gave you, with dilated pupils and pink cheeks certainly wasn't coincidental.

It was adorable really.

So one day you decided to ask him about it while you caught his gaze through the mirror as you were changing into your pyjamas.

You turned around and joined him in bed.

"Satoru, why're you always looking at my face?".

He surprisingly let out a laugh. "I can't look at my wife anymore?!", he pulled you onto his lap, his big and welcoming hands around your thighs.

The new title made you bite the inside of your cheek nervously. You sure hoped you could live up to the title of being his wife.

"You're always doing it though", you added as you smiled at his laughter.

"Well would you rather I look here?", he said in a smooth undertone, lathering slow kisses around your neck, making you let out a soft gasp.

"Or here?", Gojo let out his signature goofy laugh when he began to tug down your shirt, revealing a bit of your cleavage.

"You're such a child!", you chuckled at his behaviour when he started wiggling his fingers comedically. You swatted his hands away playfully.

You two embraced each other silently for a while until Gojo spoke again.

“Seriously though, it’s nice to think about the fact that your face will be the first thing I see every morning for the rest of my life”, he admitted, those bright blue eyes serving as evidence of his sincerity.

You cupped his cheeks fondly and placed your forehead against his.

“Forever right?”, he asked when he didn’t get a reply from you.

You were simply taking time to meditate on what he said, it was nice to hear.

“Of course Satoru, for as long as I live”.

Masterlist :)

#jjk satoru #jjk #jjk headcanons #jjk x y/n #jjk fluff #jjk gojo #jjk x you #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen #gojo #satoru gojo x reader #gojo headcanons #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x reader #gojo satoru #gojo x you #gojo fluff #gojo x y/n #satoru gojo

[atinyniki]

happy new year!

group: stray kids !

pairing: idol!bangchan x f!reader

genre: angst, hurt/comfort, fluff

warnings + additional info: reader is referred to as y/n, established relationships, fighting, reader flinches bc of chan, reader is neglected, chan says rlly mean things, reader is pretty mean too, takes place on new years/new years eve, mentions of physical abuse, kissing, crying, kiss and make up (literally), chan is kinda mean to his manager (that he hates), petname, mentions of cheating, cheating accusations.

authors note: two posts in one day hell yeah ! this is also not proofread. english is not my first language, so please excuse any grammatical or spelling errors. happy reading :)

wc: 1524

“seriously?!”

he can only bring himself to nod, evidently a little upset at your yelling.

you both go quiet for a moment, until you break it.

“chan.”

he looks up at you again, playing with his fingers in his lap. “hm?”

“are you cheating?”

“what?”

“are you cheating on me?”

“n-no! how could you even… ask that?”

you roll your eyes at him. “you havent been home in so fucking long, chan. and now you’re leaving again and it… it’s just not fair!”

“it’s my job, y/n.”

“your job shouldn’t require you to be away from me every day! you just got back”, you yell even louder.

he knows you’re frustrated, but he’s starting to get a headache. “y/n—“

“plus, even while you are here, you’re never with me… you’re always sleeping and you never talk to me.”

and then it just snaps.

“well, what if i’m tired y/n? what if i’m tired of running around all day with shitty schedules? what if i’m tired of having to exert my fucking voice all the time? what if i’m tired of you being so fucking clingy with me? i need rest!”, he yells back.

tears begin to well up in your eyes, and the words lump in your throat. despite that, you still manage to say something.

“am i really that clingy just for wanting the attention that i deserve? i’m your girlfriend for gods sake!”

he gets up off the bed, lightly stomping towards you. you notice the upset look on his face, red, teary eyes, and his hands are clenched into fists at his sides. 

you scoff at the sight, “what, you’re gonna fight me now? do it. hit me.”

though you act confident, you gulp, scared for what’s to come. he reaches a hand up to cup your face, but you shut your eyes, flinching and turning away.

there was no impact.

you turn back to chan, his face completely streaked with tears. “did… did you think i was really—“

he cuts himself off, unable to say anymore. 

you trip over your words, you know you’ve hurt him now. “i- i mean… i don’t see another reason your clench your fists. i just thought that—“

“clenching my fists eases the pain of my heart. that’s why i do it so much.”

“o-oh”

an uncomfortable silence passes between you two.

“um… just- come to me when you’ve calmed down. i’ll be in the living room.”

“o-okay.”

he makes his way out the room, his fists still clenched. you hear the pitter patter of his tears hitting the hardwood floor, and you just break.

you’ve done it. you’ve made him cry.

what kind of a girlfriend are you?

you finally let everything sink in. you sit down on your bed, wrapping yourself in the blanket, but it smells too familiar. it smells like chan.

chan will be leaving you again in two days. you don’t want to think about it, but you can’t stop. this is what he wanted after all. to think about it. to calm down. but you can’t.

not after what you said to him. not after what he said to you. your breaths become labored, gasping for air in between sobs. it gets painful, you can’t inhale anything anymore.

you’re stuck, you can’t breathe, but you’re being too loud. so you slap your hands over your mouth, hoping that he won’t hear, and you stuff your face into a pillow, body convulsing with every breath.

you clench the bedsheets, just needing to hold onto something.

chan was right. it helps.

he is not doing too well without you either. he hasn’t been able to stop crying since you left the room, trying to distract himself with the future next.

he turns on the tv, finally finding the countdown to new years. that’s when he realizes how late it is. how long it’s been since your argument.

it’s five minutes till midnight. 

the next year.

a fresh start. 

but it won’t be the same without you by his side. he tugs at his shirt, sobbing into the cushion even more. he’s careful not to make a sound, not wanting you to feel even worse than you already feel.

before he knows it, there’s only two minutes left. he has to apologize. he has to make it right. there’s no way in hell that he’s ending the year like this.

he walks over to your shared room, knocking softly.

one minute.

the doorknob turns, and you’re forced to face him again. it’s just the consequences of your actions.

your pillow is soaked with your tears, as is his cushion that’s still laying on the couch. your hands are clenched into fists beside you, just as his are now. your bloodshot eyes stare directly into his, and it’s like looking at a mirror.

twenty seconds.

he walks over to the bed, eyes flickering between the wet pillow and your puffy face. his heart clenches at the sight, and he digs his nails even harder into his palm. 

still wordless, he kneels down in front of you, where your legs are hanging off the bed. he’s now level with your face, making him far more intimidating.

five.

a tear leaves his eye.

four. 

he smiles softly at you.

three.

he glances at his phone to check the time, hand reaching for yours. you comply of course, interlacing your fingers in a desperate attempt to just feel him.

two.

he leans in closer to you, heart beating wildly in his chest. it feels like your first date all over again, the nervous feeling in his chest.

one.

using his other hand, he cups your face and pushes your foreheads together, smiling even wider when you don’t flinch away from him this time.

zero.

he steals your lips in a breathtaking kiss, and you just melt into it. your hands find his face, but before you can do anything, he picks you up, lips still attached to yours.

he sits down on the bed and pulls you further into his lap so that you’re straddling him, finally breaking away from the kiss with tears in his eyes.

“happy new year, babe…”

even more tears escape from your eyes now, but you just can’t help them. you hug chan even tighter now, scared that if you let go, he’ll be gone.

“you waited?”

“of course i did. i couldn’t leave you alone.”

you kiss him again, whispering little love confessions to him as you do. “happy new year…”

he knows the elephant in the room still needs to be addressed, and sighs. “i’m sorry for calling you clingy. i didn’t mean it. i really love the attention you give me, and i truly wouldn’t trade it for anything”

“i’m sorry for yelling at you… i should’ve handled it better. thank you for being patient with me.”

“you know i would never… um- do something like that to you… right?”

“i know chan, i was just scared… it was in the heat of the moment. i’m sorry for not understanding.”

he hugs you tightly, “i love you so much, y/n. you’ve changed my entire life, and now i actually look forward to it. i look forward to my schedules, my comebacks, even waking up… because i know it’s for you.”

you can’t even say anything, scared another sob will come out, so you take some time to process his words, kissing slowly at his neck.

“i love you too, channie. thank you for being here for me, and thank you for loving me. i know i can be so difficult and just a lot at times, but it means a lot that you try to make time for me.”

he smiles, kissing you again and tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “oh my baby… i’ve missed you.”

you’ve never heard this type of emotion in his words before, so you just know his words have a different weight to them this time. 

“i missed you too. wondered how i was gonna sleep without you, knowing that you were hurt and—“

“shh baby… it’s okay. i’m here now, yeah?”

“but you’re gonna be gone again in two days”, you jokingly whine.

he smiles, grabbing his phone from the end of the bed, and he calls someone. you’re not sure who, but it rings for a while until they answer.

“hello?”

“i’m not going to be there for the interview.”

“what? why?! we’ve been planning this for months.”

“okay, well my girlfriend was planning on having me to herself for months, but we don’t all get what we want, do we? i’m spending time with her now.”

“can we reschedule?”

“we’ll talk later.”

he hangs up, and you’re a little stunned by the coldness of his voice. you know he hates his manager, but that much? 

“not anymore, y/n.”

“i love you, dumbass”

he giggles, “i love you too, angel.”, he says in a sing-song voice while bopping your nose.

“angel? you’ve never… called me that before…”

he hums, giggling again and quickly kissing you on the cheek.

“new year, new name.”

<3

#atinyniki #skz #skz x reader #stray kids #stray kids imagines #stray kids scenarios #stray kids x reader #stray kids fluff #stray kids angst #bang chan #bangchan skz #bangchan fluff #bangchan angst #bangchan x reader #bangchan #bangchan x you #skz angst #skz fluff #skz imagines #stray kids x you

[thesmutsideblog]

Never Ever? - Spencer Reid x Reader

Summary: After a you and your long term ex breakup, some truths about your sex life come to light at the BAU and the idea that you've never had an orgasm, does not fly with Spencer Reid.

Reader is AFAB, and the story is using she/her pronouns, mostly because this one is really self indulgent and loosely based on me being pissed off about my ex.

Content warnings: dumbification of Spencer Reid, simp Spencer, shitty ex boyfriend, self indulgent writing, no beta or proof reading, cursing, smut, sexual worship, porn with plot I guess.

I have never written in second person before so I can only apologise for the shit quality of this, I havent written smut since 2018 and it's unedited, there is going to be spelling issues it's the dyslexia I'm sorry xx

GIF by comeandjointhebigboys

Spencer is doing everything in his power to look like he is minding his business, mostly because he really is trying to not eavesdrop. He came over to make a cup of coffee because he got barely any sleep last night and he wants to keep focused. But with no case directly at hand, there was something else the team were paying attention to and it was impossible for Spencer to completely ignore it.

"So he just, broke up with you?" Emily asks, dumbfounded.

"Over the phone," you say tilting your mug towards yourself, choosing to stare down at the small remainder of your coffee rather than to make eye contact with your team members.

"What an asshole," JJ says, lacing her arms together, until she looks like a disapproving mother. "Did he say why?"

"He said, we were going different places, and it would be a disservice to the time we spent together to pretend to be happy and keep lying to eachother," you say, sighing and putting the mug down, choosing to accept this caring interrogation about your breakup as your fate for the next twenty minutes.

"He used those words?" Emily asks, still trying to grapple the concept that your boyfriend, who she had met on a few occasions and had some thoughts she kept to herself about, had broken up with you.

"He used those words but what he really meant was 'I want to start sleeping with my twenty year old coworker and you spend too much time at work, so I'm ending things,' but he won't have the decency to admit that, despite the fact he was sleeping with her before the week was out," you roll your eyes as Emily and JJ continue to voice their disgust, loudly across the bullpen. You catch Spencer's eye for a moment and give him a small sad smile across the room, he nods and then looks away.

The guilt is eating Spencer alive. It's not like he actually had anything to do with the end of your relationship, he actively kept himself far away from it and even discussing it with you as possible. But the facts still remained the same, he likes you. He has liked you since your first day at the BAU and his feelings have never faltered. But you have always been in that relationship since long before he met you, and he knew that he didn't stand a chance, and he wouldn't want to mess around with that anyway. But he was unable to disagree with Prentiss, his own feelings for you aside, the simple fact of the matter was you have always been well out of your exes league. You are beautiful, and intelligent and charismatic, and your ex thought he was those things but more often than not fell short.

It's not like he even wished that your relationship would end and could blame it on the unlikely event of magical intervention. But the sheer fact that he was undeniably happier that you were no longer dating a man you were once very much in love with, that was enough to have him feeling guilty. Which is one of the many reasons he is really trying to not get involved in this conversation. One of the many reasons he is trying to keep a distance.

"How long were you two together again, like three years?" JJ asks. You shake your head.

"High school sweethearts," you correct her, "it's been a lot longer than three years."

"And he broke up with you over the phone, for a co-worker?" Emily emphasis each word in the sentence as she slowly sounds them out.

"He denies the last part but, yes," you nod.

"What are you beautiful ladies being so loud about?" Derek asks, approaching the three of you with some files in hand.

"The fact that men never fail to both disappoint and astound me," Emily states looking up at Derek from her seat, "no offence."

"None taken, but a little context wouldn't go a miss," he says looking at each of you in turn.

"My ex is a pig," you explain as nonchalantly as you can manage. You're trying really hard to be very collected about this. You've had a few days to process the breakup and you knew it was coming, even if you won't admit that to yourself. But being broken up with hurts, whether you see it coming or not. He was the only person you ever really dated, and having spent so much of your life with him this was a big adjustment. But deep down you weren't exactly mad about the situation, as much as it made you feel a lot better to complain about it. Things had not been right between the two of you for quite some time, and you find yourself almost relieved that it's over. But that still gave him no right to be as much of an asshole about it all as he has been.

"So he is the only guy you've ever really dated then, huh?" Emily asks. You give her a look as the thought crosses through her mind. "Wait, does that mean?"

"We started dating when we were barely more than kids Emily," you defend.

"So it's just been that guy, that guy?" Emily is struggling to be even the smallest part composed. "What is wrong with men?"

"You need some strange," Derek says casually.

"Morgan," JJ scolds him but Emily is slowly nodding her head. "Emily..."

"Best way to get over someone," Emily points out.

"Wow, I am not getting under anyone," you state, holding up your hands.

"Look, I understand the appeal of someone you've been with for a long time, they know you, they know what you like," Derek leans back on the table, "so new is risky, and some people really don't have a clue what they're doing I'll admit," he chuckles, "but trust me the longer you leave it-" Derek knows he isn't crossing a boundary, you and him have had plenty of conversations, but as soon as you give him the look to stop talking, he stops.

"I appreciate your concern but sex, is really not at the top of my priority list," you say.

"Please don't let a guy like that ruin it for you," Emily is staring up at the ceiling all types of distressed at the idea of your ex and his general existence.

"I don't think you need to worry about him ruining anything for me, more like just wasting my time," you say before realising that may be revealing too much. All three of them look at you instantly. "Do not read into that."

"Disinterest," Emily states looking you up and down. "And no immediate desire to release that usually comes with a breakup."

"We're not really doing this, are we?" JJ asks looking between the two profilers concerned.

"She's been distant the last few months, talking less and less about him, so the breakup wasn't unexpected, which means the sexlife probably wasn't up to scratch at the time," Derek adds.

"Oh you guys are doing this," JJ gives you an apologetic look as they start rattling off assumptions.

You try your best to ignore them until Derek says something which does tiptoe over the line- by a mile. "Pretty boy, what are the statistics on post breakup sex?" He is half joking but it pulls Spencer directly into a conversation he had been trying to avoid.

Spencer knows the answer, and that's obvious, but answering will only encourage them to get him involved in the conversation. But not answering is suspicious and could cause worse problems. He pushes his thumb into the centre of his palm as he speaks. "27% of adults report having sex with an ex within a two-year period," Spencer states knowing that's not what Derek meant but hoping he could get away with it.

"No, I mean rebound sex," Derek corrects.

"Studies show that thirty-five percent of those who are broken up with have sex to get over their ex, and twenty-five percent as a form of revenge," Spencer says giving in and stepping closer to the group.

"Look sixty five percent of rebound relationships fail within six months," you say. That's a safe thing to say you believe, as you know the team would likely assign that research as an attempt to make an educated guess how long the fling with the coworker would last. But Spencer knows better. He cannot help but wonder if that's what has been making you act differently the last few months. If you saw the end in sight and wondered what that means for you when it's over.

"You're not looking for a relationship though, you're just looking for some fun," JJ points out.

"You do remember how to have fun, don't you beautiful," Derek asks giving you a wink.

"Yeah," you say brushing him off.

"Do you?" Derek asks, unconvinced.

"I told you, I'm not interested in going out and getting laid, it's not worth the energy," you say.

"When was the last time you had an orgasm?" Emily asks. Spencer chokes on his coffee.

"Emily!" JJ chastises her.

"Someone had to ask," Emily says.

"No one had to," you tell her.

"Come on, six months?" Emily asks. "A year?"

"Emily," JJ warns.

"Shit..." Derek whispers and you feel his gaze on you intensifying. He has you all figured out.

"What?" Spencer asks, not meaning to.

Derek is keeping his eyes on you and you cannot meet his eye. "Tell me I'm wrong pretty girl," Derek says, wanting himself to be wrong.

"I... I don't know... You're a profiler, how am I supposed to lie to you?" You huff.

"Are you kidding me?" Derek asks.

"Derek you're not helping," you state.

"Sorry," he says, "I just don't understand how that can be the case."

"You said it yourself, some people really don't have a clue what they're doing," you say.

"So you've never?" Emily asks cottoning on.

"Can we please stop talking about this," you say.

Spencer's brain is ticking over trying to read between the lines and when it clicks he is struck with a similar dumbfounding as Morgan. How? How?

He cannot help but have one clear thought scrambling around his brain at a million miles per hour. If he had ever had the chance, he wouldn't have wanted anything more than to make sure you felt good. To know he had made you feel good.

How inconsiderate could your ex be? How little attention must he have been playing to not even notice that you were not getting what he was out of it? How had he never cared to make that better?

And why did you not feel cheated by that fact?

"I'm not eavesdropping," Garcia defends bringing Spencer out of his head and back into the room.

"Okay why don't we just fax everyone the stats on my sex life," you groan, resting your head in your hands.

"I'm just saying," Garcia tries.

"I appreciate all of the unnecessary concern," you say, "but my sex life isn't a BAU case." Emily smiles as she goes to speak but you catch her thought right before she opens her mouth. "And it's no ones problem to solve either."

"It's a little tragic," JJ confesses.

"JJ," you're surprised, JJ is normally the one you can count on to get the others back on track but she just shrugs.

"Let's leave it be, Garcia do we have a case," Spencer is talking with his hands even more than normal and you cannot help but notice. He is trying to come to your rescue and you appreciate that. You appreciate everything Spencer does.

"Maybe," Garcia explains, waving her tablet at the group. "Hotch wants us in the conference room, five minutes ago."

You're quick to get out of your seat and away from the grilling you are receiving from the team and everyone else is quick behind you. Hotch and Rossi are at the desk when you all enter.

Hotch frowns. "You took a while," he notes.

"Discussing the breakup?" Rossi asks, looking you up and down.

"I dont even want to know what has given that away," you admit taking a seat. Hotch nods a half apology which you silently shrug off in return.

You were trying your best to pay attention, giving Hotch the respect he deserves, but the case he was talking about didnt feel like it required the BAU's involvement and Emily is quick to voice that opinion. You managed to register a few words about consulting and favours, but nothing is really sinking in, not when you can feel Spencer's gaze on you as hot as a fever.

You raise your eyes to meet his and they dart away. You think back, and it occurs to you that maybe conversations about your sex life or anyone of the teams sex lives for that matter wasnt exactly what Spencer signed up for. You feel a little guilty, knowing you kind of indulged the others and let him get pulled into the conversation even if that wasnt your intention.

You catch him looking at you again but he doesnt see you looking back, it's like he is trapped in a thought, and in this moment you've never seen Spencer look so without a clue.

"Reid?" Hotch asks, repeating the question.

Spencer looks to Hotch, and he buffers. You know he knows the answer to the question, you know he always knows, but his brain seems to have frozen up on him. "I... sorry what?"

"This is statistics kid," Derek says, "are you sick or something?"

Emily gently pokes Spencers shoulder. "Maybe he is getting a software update," she jokes.

You lean forward and give Hotch the answer he is looking for, remembering from a conversation you and Spencer had a few weeks back about Ohio. Hotch gives a side eye to Rossi before continuing.

You look back at Spencer and he is watching you again, you offer him a small smile and he returns it. You've always been better at reading Spencer than most members of the team but you don't recognize this behaviour at all.

"Are you okay?" You ask him as you both make your way down the steps of the BAU.

"Of course, why do you ask?"

"You blanked back there, Spence, pretty hard," you say as gently as you can, "I havent seen you like that since..."

"Since when?" Spencer looks curious, and softer somehow.

"Since we worked that case in Illinois, with the models, you took one look at that girl Annie Grant was it, and your IQ dropped like a hundred points," you laugh gently.

"She was pretty," Spencer confesses.

"I think Morgan got her number," you recall.

"He did," Spencer agrees.

"So, what is it? Because it's not a pretty girl in lounge wear," you say.

"You dont know that for sure," you can tell he is trying to joke around the subject, and normally youd find that cute. Cute in the kind of way you havent been able to admit to yourself before. Because having a crush on a coworker is not convenient at the best of times.

"Okay, Dr Reid, keep your secrets," you give him gentle shove and his smile is disarming, soft and so happy to just be involved. "Got any fun evening plans?"

"There's this new study into cognitive dissonance in specific trauma patterns I have been meaning to read," he offers. You bite back a chuckle.

"You've got a date with science," you nod to yourself, "of course you do."

He looks around, thinking for a moment. "Are you going to walk?" He asks.

"I usually do," you admit, "it's only a few blocks after all."

"Can I," he pauses, "can I walk you?"

"You want to walk me home?" You ask, a little suprised at the offer.

"If that's okay, the study can wait," he says. There is a look in his eyes you can't quite pinpoint, somewhere between pleading and hopeful. You nod.

"I'd love that Spence."

The distance to your apartment door had never felt so short, and you hadn't realised until now quite how much you enjoyed the moments when you were with Spencer, and no one else was watching. Maybe because he paid less attention to making sure no one noticed him watching you, and he just keeps watching.

Spencer looks at his feet as you fumble with your keys, he has no idea what he is doing. He didn't think any of this through, he just kept thinking about you, and what you deserved and what you should've always been given and now he is stood at the doorstep of your place with no plan, no idea of what compelled him to think any of this was a good idea and no idea of what to do next.

You smile at him, and bite your lower lip just a small bit, the look is so demure that Spencer wonders if he imagined the entire conversation in the bullpen, wondering if maybe he was really so wrapped up in these months of conflicted feelings for you that he managed to lapse from reality so badly that he got himself here.

"Do you want to come in for coffee?" You offer and his heart damn near stops in his chest.

"Coffee is never coffee kid," Derek's voice rings in his head. "It's an invitation."

"Got decaf?" Spencer asks, and you laugh.

"Like anyone who works at the BAU knows what decaf is," you open the door wide and walk through. "You coming?"

He doesn't answer but follows you, closing the door behind him. Your apartment isn't a mess but it's clear things have been moved around since your breakup, there is clear empty spaces where things once collected dust, like so many things once filled a place and vanished. You weren't dwelling on the relationship, because there wasn't a point. You had loved and you had lost, and you knew it went like that sometimes.

"You better not be profiling me Dr Reid," you quip as you catch him looking around.

"I wouldn't dare," he says.

"So, are you going to explain why you're being so sheepish?" You ask, reaching for a mug, to actually make coffee.

"I'm being sheepish?" he asks. He had hoped he was hiding it better.

"Nervous at the very least," you say putting the kettle on. He says nothing and you sigh. "Did we make you uncomfortable earlier?"

"What?" Spencer asks, caught off guard by the question.

"Talking about my ex," you offer up. "I know that sort of gossip isn't exactly for everyone-,"

"No," he is quick to defend, "that's not what's bothering me."

You smirk and he sees the trap you laid for him that he walked right into. "So something is bothering you pretty boy," Morgan's nickname for him falls from your lips and it sounds so different. It burns every nerve ending, each fibre of his being and he forgets how to speak for a moment too long. "Spence?"

"I," he brings himself back.

"I don't mean to pry, you don't have to tell me anything," you explain quickly.

"How was your ex such an idiot?" he asks outright. You laugh, it's short and shallow because you're not expecting anything close to that from Spencer.

"What?" It's your turn to feel dumb now as you spiral trying to process what Spencer is suggesting. That the conversation had gotten to him, but not in the way you'd thought. His problem hadn't been with the topic but the content, the confession. The kettle brings itself to a boil but you're interest is elsewhere now.

"I don't mean to speak out of place here, but if I were him there are so many things I would've done differently," he fidgets with his tie but doesn't stop. This confession is coming out now or not at all and he wants it finished. He needs it finished. He does not want blurred lines. Not between the two of you. "Not even touching the subject of how your relationship ended. I wouldn't have left you in the rain last October, I wouldn't have held all the things I knew about you when we met as reasons to run years after I agreed to love you regardless. I wouldn't have let you go to work angry all those times. I wouldn't have lied about plans. I wouldn't have let you go to sleep sad or angry, and be gone in the morning. I wouldn't have left you wanting, for anything. Because if I was him I would understand what a beautiful rarity it is to find someone who does what you do, with your compassion and determination and dedication and is still kind, still hopeful, even when things are dark. There are not a lot of things I don't know much about, and maybe relationships, and romance and sex are in that limited list, and maybe he would argue that hypotheticals hold no ground when your experience is as limited as mine, but I frankly don't care what his opinion would be. Because he didn't see you for what you are and that means his thoughts are of no value to me. I don't tell you this because I am expecting you to say anything, it's just burning me up that you weren't treated, hell worshiped, in the way you deserved and I had to tell you that I can't think of anything more wrong." He steps back and you're still catching your breath. "I, I am sorry I shouldn't have... I will see you at work."

He turns and strides to the door, and your breath heaves in and out of your chest and you wonder if you can find your voice before his hand finds purchase on your doors lock. "Spencer," you breathe out. He pauses, hand hovering over the door handle.

"Yes?" his voice is so quiet, and he doesn't turn to look at you.

"Please don't leave," the request falls from your lips and Spencer has never felt more of a need to do something than to do anything you ask of him in this moment. But his doubt still hangs gently in the space between the two of you.

"What?" he asks again, searching in the word to find something to hold onto, looking for some guidance or instructions he missed. He didn't have a plan, and he doesn't know what to do with this.

"Please," you say again, voice sturdier now as you start to close the distance between the two of you, "Spence," his breath hitches as you place a hand gently on his shoulder, encouraging him to turn back to you, and he does, "don't leave."

His eyes stare into yours and you swear you feel all the months of unsaid things, of quiet wanting, of stolen thoughts in weak moments, bursting at the seams. You had told yourself in another world, another life time, had you met Spencer Reid and the timing had been different, if you had been different, he would've been everything. You told yourself from that first day that those brown eyes may plead into you with every moment you meet them but it was never going to be the right time.

His eyes stare into yours and he feels the weight of all the things he long tired to bury, crawling their way up from the depths and pushing against his skin, desperate to get out. Desperate to be known. Desperate to correct the wrongs and do right by you. Desperate.

His hand hovers touch's length away, scared to close the distance, scared to make the move, to change everything. You both know in this moment, that all it takes is one touch and you're going over the cliff.

This is a road you do not turn back from.

You whisper one last time, like a prayer, "Spence," and in a blink gravity turns back on, and everything blooms in bright technicolour.

It unfolds in a rush, his hand to your waist, pulling you that much closer, both of your hands gripping to the fabric of his shirt as he pulls you up to him, other hand moving gently under your chin to guide the tilt of your head. His lips crash onto yours and there's a hunger you've never seen in him, and a hunger you've never known inside yourself.

There's a gentleness, a caution in his desperation, in his need, one that you don't have in your own. He keeps kissing you and you back up, footing not very careful as you tighten your grip on his shirt. Your back finds support against the edge of your counter and you find yourself letting on of the hands slip from the fabric of his button down to tug at his tie, to keep him closer at first, and then in an attempt to remove it entirely.

He pulls back for a moment, not to catch breath as either of you would be happy to drown in this moment, but his eyes are scanning you, like he is looking for something else, something missing.

You pause, slowly tugging the tie from his collar and letting it fall to your floor. "Spencer?" you ask.

He looks lost as he breathes in. "I don't know what I am doing," he says.

"You're doing great is what you're doing," you say, not looking away.

"Is this okay?" he finally asks. Your heart starts running away from you as you try to remember to breathe.

"This is more than okay," you assure him, "please Spencer, don't stop kissing me."

That's all he needs to hear and his lips are back on yours and the kisses are feverish and starved and he presses his hands into your hips and the gentle moan that leaves your lips sends Spencer's mind spinning.

He pulls his lips from yours and starts kissing a trail down to your neck, you lean more into the support of the counter top and let a hand find it's way into a tangle of his brown hair.

His tongue against your skin, the gentle brush of teeth on that spot that makes the sound from before seem like a draft of a masterpiece. Spencer knows that now he has heard you, voice like honey, moan trembling from your lips, nails dug into his scalp gently tugging on his hair, barely able to keep your eyes open yet again your breathing steady, no sound will ever compare.

In the the times he had let himself think about you, imagine all the things, let his fantasies and dreams run away with him, he had never come close to this moment. How your fingers shake as you start to unbutton his shirt, needing to do something, needing something.

Needing him.

And you can feel his need in return, in the way he holds onto you, on the way he is listening to your body, hearing every response, feeling every movement, determined to do this right.

He feels the way you press your tights together, tight against the counter, the need for something more radiating off of you, and you don't give time for the doubt to creep in. "We should," you breathe out as you feel the blood rushing through you, knowing that there will be marks from where he is kissing you that you won't be able to hide tomorrow, not that you want to, "move this to the bedroom."

"Is now a bad time to point out that I have mostly just a conceptual understanding of what we are about to do?" Spencer asks between kisses.

"I think you're worrying too much, because if you're basing this on theory," you take his hand leading him towards your room, "so far you're giving nothing but hard evidence."

You let your own innuendo slide as you both fall back onto your bed, he looks down as he leans over you, and there's a softness, a patience in this moment, as he needs to soak it all in.

You reach up and continue to undo the buttons on his shirt until they are completely undone, and he watches you as you do, you give the fabric a gentle tug and he catches on, slipping the rest of the shirt and the jacket off and letting it fall back somewhere out of mind. You trace a hand gently up his arm and he leans down to kiss you again, your lips, your jaw, your neck.

He runs a thumb over the deep red mark he has left and you feel the fever rising again. You need out of these clothes, you need more.

You start to undo your own shirt buttons and as each button comes undone Spencer follows the trail of exposed skin and leaves hot kisses on each new place.

You can feel the hard outline of his cock against your thigh as you reach to unzip the side of your skirt. The nervousness is still fluttering in Spencer's face as he helps you slip out of it. His fingertips brushing over exposed skin, his hand creeping up the inside of your thigh and you buck up gently at the touch.

His lips trace kisses up your torso to your chest and like this, each kiss so intoxicating, each touch so electrifying, his hand inching further and further up your thigh, as his lips dance over the skin around the fabric of your bra there is nothing he could ask of you that you would not do.

Sex may never have been perfect before, but you'd always thought it was at least decent, passing, respectable. But this build up with Spencer, his hands on your skin, his lips leaving evidence on your body that he has been here, this was more than you'd ever felt. And he hadn't even really touched you yet.

You reach to undo his trousers, eager to get him in less clothing but he pulls back, out of your reach. "Not yet," he whispers against your skin, "you start doing that and this will be over way too soon." He brings his lips to yours again, stealing a deep kiss as he unclasps your bra. "And this is about you, all about you," he is mumbling again, almost incoherent against you. He is determined, his mind is focused on you and your pleasure and what you deserve.

You don't think you've ever wanted anything as much as you want this.

His thumb brushes against the your clothed skin, and sparks shoot through your body, nails digging into his shoulder as you gasp at the contact.

He nudges closer, his forehead pressed to yours, and you look at him. Spencer, your colleague, your friend. Spencer who never forgets your coffee order. Spencer who stayed all night to help with paperwork because you lost a bet. Spencer who has accompanied you to every movie you've ever asked him to. Spencer who bought an extra ticket to every convention just in case you would want to come.

"Please," you plead, like you need to, as if it was possible that he wouldn't do anything for you in this moment. As if you even needed to ask.

He kisses you, pulling you up and towards him, breathing you in as his hand finds its way between the elastic of your underwear and your skin.

Your nerves are as quick to respond to his touch as fire to a accelerant. Every movement makes you wonder if Spencer was given some map of your body that you didn't know existed, a guide to movement and pressure and timing that couldn't be more perfect.

You are nodding at his movements, keening at every increase of pace, every finger curl, every swipe of his thumb. Your body shuddering in anticipation and a pleasure you never knew courses through you.

Spencer is leaving compliments with every kiss across your body, so eager to please, so desperate to worship. When he hits the spot, your body gives you away at alarming speed, you buck, moving your arms to prop yourself up on elbows, leaning into him, into the movements, rutting against him. "Fuck," you manage in the haze.

Spencer responds to this approval with dedication and vigour and then you feel it, that hot white coil of pleasure pulling at you, like a tight chord. "Shit," you start breathing heavier, faster, "shit, shit."

"You're so incredibly beautiful," you hear Spencer whisper. You can't keep your eyes open as your knees begin to shake.

"Spencer," you whimper, not for any reason but to say his name. The need to say his name over and over, and over as the chord pulls tight and finally snaps.

The pleasure explodes through you, every nerve tingling, like fireworks cascading through you. You shake, riding the high through and fall back onto the bed, slumped with a laboured breath.

Spencer moves back up to be level with you, gently brushes some stray hairs from your face and he smiles down at you. "That is what it's supposed to feel like?" You ask.

If this was all he could have for the rest of his life, Spencer would be a happy man. He plants a kiss on your forehead, and that look of devotion has not left his eyes.

But he has been filled with a new sense of purpose, like he was made for this. For you.

He doesn't have time to debate internally if your ex was purely just that poor at what he did or if it feeling so easy, coming so naturally to him was something else entirely. He didn't really care which it was, maybe both. Right now all he cared about was making up for lost time, lost opportunities, all your disappointment.

He kisses you again and the force of it is more knowing, more sure, it's hot and messy and every moment it feels like you need to be closer, deeper, more entwined. The whole time he keeps his hand in your underwear, thumb running in soft, intensely accurate circles as his fingers do most of the work.

It crosses your mind that maybe it should be almost embarrassing that he is making it so easy. It should be embarrassing that Spencer barely needed any time to bring that second orgasm to precipice. It should be embarrassing that you're convinced this man could make you come by the way he kisses you alone, but you're not embarrassed. Not because you've never felt the pleasure like this before, not because you think pleasure it never something to be embarrassed about and not because after everything you deserve this. But because it's Spencer Reid, and everything with him has always felt like it is exactly as it should be, and him making you feel this way, is no exception.

He holds you in the kiss as your second orgasm pulses through you, just as intense as the first one, he feels you shake as it floods you. A moan escaping into the kiss, from your mouth to his and he groans against your lips.

He is so focused on you that he isn't paying any attention to how this is effecting him, how hard he is against you. How desperate he is for you. His need for your pleasure overtaking any need of his own.

You know if left to his own devices Spencer would stay as the two of you are, skin pressed to skin, lips on yours, trying to write years worth of wrongs in one night. But you do not want to give into exhaustion before you have let him ruin your expectations in all the ways you know.

He moves from your lips to your neck and before you can process much of his plans you feel the kisses trailing your hipbone, and with the third orgasm approaching you can see where his mind has wondered to. You lean forward, gasping in pleasure, but determined to get his attention, you place a hand on the side of his face, tilting up his chin to meet your eyes. "Wait," is all you manage to moan out before the pleasure tears into you, your head falls back and you grab a fistful of sheet, trying to keep yourself up through the pleasure.

Spencer does as you ask and waits until you manage to gather your words, eyes on you. "Please," you try. He runs his eyes over your body trying to understand your request.

You reach down, pulling once again at the edge of his trousers, fumbling to undo them, to get him out of them. You've never known Spencer to be so slow to catch on, but he is practically drunk on you.

"Oh," he manages. "Oh."

Before he can start to explain all the reasons he doesn't think that's important right now you look up at him with those eyes so pleading. "Please," you whisper again.

And he is putty in your hand, happy to do anything you ask of him, he nods and you finish undoing his trousers and push them down, he finishes discarding them.

Now it's your fingertips against his skin and he holds his breath as you move for his boxers. "Is this okay?" you ask quietly.

"You're everything I have ever wanted," the honey leaves his lips and you kiss him, his lips focused on you as you help him out of his boxers and pull him down and close.

"I need you," you whisper. "Right now, I need you."

"I am yours," he responds.

You keep your fingers threaded in his hair, and you tug a little harder as you become overwhelmed with him. "Fuck," Spencer's voice shudders in pleasure and you understand his desperation to please you instantly, because you want nothing more than to give him everything.

Everything becomes a mixture of moans and names, lips pressed to skin, and fabric scrunched with every thrust. You kiss Spencer's neck, finding his sweet spot with a similar precision to which he found yours. Leaving a collection of marks on his neck before her buries his face into yours, repeating your name over and over, becoming more and more wanting. His neediness matching your own and as he digs his fingers into your hips that now familiar feeling starts to rush you.

"Spencer, I am going to cum again," you whisper. Spencer cannot form words, he just keeps kissing, sucking, digging at your skin, even now he isn't close enough to you. "Fuck!" You scream out and the pleasure of your orgasm is almost too much for Spencer.

"Fuck, I," Spencer's brain is doing flips trying to figure out what to do, what he is supposed to do. "I am going to."

"Please," you beg in his ear.

"I should, I haven't," he is trying to piece the words together but they're not coming. You know what is trying to say, what is cannot find the words to ask.

"Please stay with me," you say, nudging his nose with your own, "please."

Your gentle request is his breaking point and he crashes his lips back onto yours as his own orgasm comes to fruition.

He collapses down next to you, both catching your breath. "Fuck," you repeat, for what might be the millionth time, as you long lost count.

You cannot help it, you let out a little laugh and Spencer glances at you, a smile breaking out on his face. "For the record, I hadn't planned that," he says.

"For the record, I really planned on drinking my coffee."

"I can make you a coffee," Spencer offers, turning to his side.

"We should, get cleaned up first," you smile.

"Then coffee?"

"Then coffee."

#spencer reid #criminal minds #criminal minds smut #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fanfic #spencer reid smut #smut #smut fanfic #no beta we die like jason gideon #reader x spencer reid #bau fanfic #bau smut #matthew gray gubler #fanfic #x reader #bau #criminal minds fic

[elliesdirtywifebeater]

smile for the camera!

pairing: needy dom!abby x sub afab!reader

summary: abby records you while you suck her strap cw: strap sucking, recording, oral, praising, strap fucking, overstimulation, pet names.

a/n: ignore how i havent posted in like 2 months and take this as an apology!

even though it isnt real abby loved it when you sucked her strap, she loved looking down at you seeing the faces you make. watching you touch yourself as your tongue worked around her cock. what she especially loved was recording you.. whenever you were away she'd watch the videos she would take of you. "fuck baby you always take me so well" abby huffed out, every thrust she made in your throat she could feel it rub against her clit. gathering your hair into her hand she had a firm grip on you "g-god i love that pretty mouth of yours.." she moaned out leaning her head back as her eyes closed, muffled moans escaped your lips as her cock went deeper in your mouth, gagging here and there. you rubbed yourself through your panties you were soaked and you couldnt get enough of her, you loved the feeling of her in your mouth. "you wanna touch yourself princess?" she asked in a low husk and she looked down at you as she pulled your head back a bit and you looked up at her through your eyelashes, glancing up at her phone as she recorded your pretty face on her cock. you hummed in response nodding your head eagerly, looking desperate. "go ahead and make yourself feel good baby, youve been so good for me.." she grunted out, you loved the noises you could make her do. with her permission you reached in your panties, drawing circles around your throbbing clit, you moaned against abbys cock more and you bobbed your head faster making the strap rub against her more. "fuck y/n.. just like that, youre doing so good baby" she mustered out between moans. you gripped her thigh with your free hand, it would probably leave a mark.

you felt abby's thrust pick up a bit, you could tell she was close from her shaky moans "m'gonna c-cum.. fuck" she huffed out as he grip on you tightened, her legs started shaking a bit as she hit her climax calling out your name dragging out the last bit. she almost dropped the phone. she pulled you off her cock and you let a breath out, panting. she grabbed your chin making you look up at her, you looked a mess with your hair everywhere and drool dripping down your chin as you looked up at the camera. "youre so pretty baby." she said in a sweet whisper giving you a kiss, as she pulled away you chased her lips a bit wanting more. "lay on the bed, ass up. now," she ordered and you mindlessly obeyed her. she sat down her phone, she was gonna need both hands for this. she got get getting behind you and grabbed your hips caressing you softly before slapping your ass, leaving a print. you jumped a bit surprised and a moan slipped out. you were dripping wet for her, the way it ran down your thigh drove abby crazy.. it made her feel so in control seeing the effect she had on you. "is all this for me sweetheart? you wanna cum don't you?" she said teasingly as her hand reached down and took her middle finger running it along your slit, sending chills down your spin making you moan softly "y-yes, i wanna cum.. please abby.." you pleaded out, you hated but loved her teasing at the same time. it just made you want her even more. "since you asked so nicely.." she said lowly, you felt her rub her cock against your slit teasing you before sliding inside of you slowly, you loved the way she stretched you out. "oh fuck" you muttered out between moans. "oh baby you're so tight.." she huffed out as she gripped your hips, pushing herself all the way in. she let you get comfortable for a bit before she started thrusting in you, slowly. her hands ran along your waist and ass. "a-abby.." you moaned out as you lightly gripped the blanket, "yes baby? c'mon use your words i know you can.." she said moaning softly "f-faster.. please." you begged, you knew she loved it when you begged. "as you wish my love" she mustered out, the grip she had on your waist tightened as her thrusts grew in pace making your moans grow louder, it was like music to her ears. "atta girl.." she grunted out through gritted teeth. you felt her reach her hands around your waist as she started rubbing circles on your clit adding extra stimulation. "o-oh m'god" you moaned out and her fingers moved faster matching the pace of her thrusting. her hand moved from your waist to your back pushing you into the bed as her thrusts grew rougher as she knew you were getting close. you gripped the blanket moaning out her name with curses following behind, your mind was just drawing blanks and all you could think about was how good she was making you feel. "cum for me sweetheart, cum all over my cock come on.." she huffed out

after a few more thrust you let out a loud breathy moan as you came all over her cock. but that didn't stop her.. she kept going, she took both her hands grabbing your waist slamming you against her. she couldn't get enough of hearing your pretty moans. you whimpered out as her thrusts became too much, "a-abby.. please.. s'too m-much.." you whimpered out, she got in a couple extra thrusts before she stopped. she was breathing heavy and as were you. you collapsed underneath of her holding onto the blanket still, feeling your legs shake still a bit. abby leaned down kissing your shoulder and neck leading up to your cheek leaving a sweet a kiss "you did such a good job babygirl, you took me so well" she said in a whisper against your ear "lets get you cleaned up"

#abby x reader #tlou abby #abby anderson x reader #abby anderson smut #abby tlou #the last of us part 2 #the last of us 2 #the last of us fanfiction #lesbian #wlw #smut #kinktober 2023