Hot tip, if you get into a committed relationship with someone that has chronic health issues please, please, please understand that that person may not be able to do anything for themselves for weeks to months at a time, and a large burden is going to fall on you. Take the time to make sure you're able to handle it before you commit.
I didn't ask for my body to fail.
My favorite quote from my doctor was, “it can’t really be that bad if you are still working and doing everything you do." I told him I didn’t know I had a choice.🤷🏻♀️
Years in pain, tired and the many changes in me for no reason or apparent reason... Hiding everything from someone else, pretending to be doing better than you are; until it no longer works. No matter how strong you want to be.
Then the moment comes when they tell you what you have... You have mixed feelings. You finally know what you have, but how do you deal with it?
Lack of encouragement, wanting to lie down, taking medication frequently, having a whole pharmacy on top of the nightstand.
Then, the daily responses, "Why did you get so fat?" “I have this great diet, if you just go out and exercise."
That once beautiful hair of yours now awful and it falls out.
What happened to you???
This is all true and that's why I'm sharing it!
Silent and invisible diseases do exist.
When you have an invisible disease it is difficult to argue from your perspective with ignorant people.
Life takes a lot of turns!!!
Tired of being told:
* Did you go to the doctor?
* Have you tried this?
* Have you tried that?
* I don’t know what else we can do for you...
Yes! I tried and still try everything!!!
Doctors say this disease is forever. That I will not heal. However, I am not giving up, but I want to make others realize:
* A nap will not cure me but it will help me ...
* I am not lazy, I take medication and it sometimes makes me sleepy.
* I am not angry but sometimes cranky with pain.
* I struggle daily with pain, mobility problems, fatigue, the criticism of my environment.
Most frustratingly, people look at me and say, "It can't be that bad; you look good"
Despite the fact that my body is experiencing excruciating pain everywhere, of course I look good, I always try to look good, it is an "invisible" disease.
This disease affects me physically, mentally and emotionally. Because rare autoimmune diseases cannot be seen, but we feel them.
And they are there... Silent attack but extra painful.
I AM LOOKING AT THOSE WHO TAKE TIME TO READ THIS POST TO THE END.
The following request is sent to the post:
Please, for me and in honor of someone who fights against:
-Ankylosing Spondylitis
-Lupus
-MS
-POTS
-Dysautonomia
-Crohn’s Disease
- Ménière’s Disease
-Addisons Disease
-Hashimotos Disease
-Graves Disease
-FND
-Depression
-Anxiety
-Autoimmune disease
-Sjogrens syndrome
-Polycystic ovary syndrome.
-Rheumatoid arthritis.
-Chronic pain
-Endometriosis.
-migraines
-Multiple sclerosis.
-Myasthenia gravis.
-Pulmonary hypertension.
-Epstein Barr syndrome.
-Chronic fatigue syndrome.
-Diabetes
-Fibromyalgia.*
-Raynaud and Scleroderma.
-Neuralgia of the trigeminal
-Epilepsy
-Cancer
-Hypothyroidism
-Arachnoiditis
-NEAD
-Vasculitis
- Chronic Kidney Disease / failure (CKD)
-Alpha 1 antitrypsin deficiency
or some other disease you don't see.
COPY AND PASTE:
I understand if you don't, It's okay. Type ''done" in comments and thank you for your support.
I would like 5 of my friends to post (not share) this message to show that you are always there when that someone needs to talk. In support of a friend, a family member who is fighting any of these diseases. Just say “done” ❤️❤❤❤
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Umm, I have an end of year math test in 3 days and it's kind of stressing me out. Any test taking tips or emotional support the baldi's basics team can give? (Plus i haven't asked in an ask blog before so this might kind of suck and yes i did post this on another ask blog)
Mr. Baldimore: Don't take too long on one question, if a problem is too difficult, then go to the next one. When showing your work, take as long as you need to write it all down. Even if you don't get a perfect A+, know that you did your best!
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the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.
sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.
you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.
it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.
but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.
they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.
they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.
barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.
and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.
but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.
they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!
this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.
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got angry and posted this in a random youtube comment section, but its an important message so its going here too, bc i have no tolerance for asswipes
lots of idiots in the comments seem to think a furry is the same as a zoophile, so here's a message to those guys:
grow up and get some basic human decency you pathetic slops. let me explain for the so called "free thinkers" buying into the stigma; furry doesnt mean someone wants to screw an animal, it just means someone likes cute anthropomorphic characters or whatever. its just harmless fun, and youre incredibly full of yourself, as well as, simply put, just a plain ol pearl clutching judgemental Karen for ragging on and slandering someone for a harmless hobby. and i will admit, there are bad apples, but those are everywhere, in everything, no matter where you look. the waiter at your local restaurant could be a serial kxler (mispelled to avoid cens0rs), but you dont have people accusing restaurant workers of being kxlers, do you? get some therapy before you clutch your pearls so hard they break, just like any semblance of basic decency you may have had once upon a time. anyways, i look forward to seeing you all meme this into oblivion because your tiny little egos cant handle being called out for the absolute Karens you are, so you try and turn it into a joke :) (obligatory im not a furry, but a close friend of mine is, and im tired of seeing scum attack people close to me, indirectly or not)
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
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