‼️//tw, cw: blood, vile descriptions(??)‼️
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yep, Willow is silly and cute, buuut..
once in Skull Cavern, when all food were running low, he had to resort to devouring the raw meat of the first monster he saw
imagine - you're walking through the deserted dark corridors of the cavern, and you come upon a lean and deathly pale torso shaking over the carcass of a huge serpent, and seeing the light, he turns around, and you see Willow, who is like a ravenous mad animal, tearing out bloody chunks of flesh, swallowing it hungrily and painfully. his pupil trembles and reflexively narrows from the sharp beam of the flashlight, and he stares at you fearfully, holding a torn piece of meat with blood still dripping down it..
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I feel some some straight women need to get a little more comfortable with the idea that sometimes bisexual men ARE visibly queer and you can be attracted to that as a cis straight women so maybe it's not necessary to pitch a fit when people point out he's written as bisexual and take it as an insult because you still have the internalized idea that bisexuality is just being like...Diet Gay
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"We don't hate Jews and fight them because they are Jews. Jews are people of a religion, and we are people of a religion. We love all people of different religions. My brother even if he is my brother and he is a Muslim—if he steals my house and kicks me out, I will resist him."
— Sheikh Ahmed Ismail Hassan Yassin, founder of Hamas.
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Something else that makes me sympathetic to Pharma's situation is like. Idk if there's an actual term for this or if someone smarter and more academic wrote it about some real life context that actually matters.
But, so we've already established among Pharma stans that the circumstances at Delphi were blackmail/torture with no real way out that wouldn't involve Pharma being responsible for people getting killed (either killing patients for the deal or having everyone die bc he failed his end of the deal).
And I feel like while "he's still in the wrong because he killed people" is part of it, another sort of implicit part is the idea that Pharma should've been willing to take more personal risk, maybe even risk dying? I mean, Ratchet does ask "why didn't you just detonate it near the DJD" (to which Pharma responds that he did try to get Sonic and Boom to do it, but they refused) so like
Idk I feel like we do have this social notion of martyrs as a very romantic ideal, people you can praise for being so brave and strong and righteous that they ended their own lives for their cause, while you can also coo about how sad and tragic it is that dying is what it took for them to do the right thing. But at the same time I feel like in reality, having an expectation that people become martyrs is kind of a toxic social norm bc like. It's very easy to demand that others sacrifice their lives for some Ultimate Moral Good when you yourself aren't experiencing the same hardships as they are. And ultimately it is kind of fucked up to tell someone "the moral thing you should've done was risk your life/kill yourself" because asking someone to pay their life to do the right thing is no small request. And sure, the typical response would be to call them a "coward" for caring more about saving their own skin instead of doing the right thing... but again, death is a really scary thing and self-preservation is a really strong instinct, so it kind of feels like having this binary view of "you're either a Brave Hero who sacrifices your life for everyone else or a Dirty Coward who's too scared of dying to do what's right" is kind of fucked up?
I guess the best way to describe it is that if someone willingly gives up their life as a sacrifice to others, it can be a noble thing because it's a choice they made willingly, but if it becomes a Moral Standard that in order to be a Good Person you have to be unafraid of throwing your life away and if you aren't willing to die you're a Cowardly Bad Person, that's when it becomes toxic.
Idk, I guess how this ties back to Pharma is that he was never in a position where he expected to make these kinds of moral decisions/ultimatums. He's a doctor who doesn't even get into combat, his job is to heal and not to kill, he's behind the front lines in a hospital that's supposed to be a safe, neutral place for him to heal people. So in the face of suddenly having a "murder people on behalf of me, or I murder everyone you swore to protect" ultimatum thrust upon him, I understand why Pharma wasn't """"""""""brave enough"""""""""" to "do the right thing" (whatever that would've been in the case of Delphi). You could argue that maybe a frontliner soldier accepted the burden of possibly dying for their cause and they've become used to it as someone who lives that reality every single day, but I feel like for Pharma, who's a doctor and a protected non-combatant (from what we can tell), that sort of risking of his life/living with the fact his life could be snuffed out any day isn't something he would've been prepared for at all.
And for me personally, from an outsider's perspective, it strikes me as kind of unethical to go "oh well he should've just detonated the bomb himself even if it killed him" bc again, there's a difference between witnessing a moral conundrum as a bystander versus being the person living with it and being under time pressure where it's do-or-die. Just as part of my personal standards, I feel like death is such a huge consequence/burden of someone's actions (literally you are no longer alive, any potential you had left is cut short, you cease to exist on this plane) that it feels rather callous to go "Well you should've just been willing to die for your beliefs if you really cared that much!!!"
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People appear to like my first unhinged Renfield post so here’s another one:
The scene where Bobert Montague Renfield talks about his wife and kid. This is a scene that feels really out of place because it’s right between two high energy action scenes and a lot of people on first watch will be like “why do we care about this?” In a lesser movie, this scene would have an explicitly romantic overtone, an “I failed my wife and kid but I won’t fail you, love interest.” We don’t get that and the movie is BETTER FOR IT (but that’s a post for later.) People might especially be confused by this scene because when we see Dracu-Cage doing his best manipulate mansplain manslaughter earlier in the movie, he pulled this exact piece of information: (paraphrasing) “you abandoned your wife and kids because you wanted my power, you’re the evil one who took advantage of me!!” And the instinct is of course to say that’s not true!! That’s just Dracu-Cage manipulating the facts!! It’s Drac’s fault Renfield left, not his!!
And I personally (personal taste alert) really like that this movie didn’t go there. Instead, there is a grain of truth there. Renfield did have a choice, he had agency then to turn down the power and he has agency now to walk away. That is something a lot of stories of abuse overlook because it’s VERY hard to do it without looking like you’re blaming the victim for their abuse. “Oh if it’s so bad why don’t you just leave?” type shit, not a fan, I don’t have to explain that. But this movie has motherfuckin DRACULA as its antagonist!! We see this guy literally commit mass murder to punish Renfield for exercising his agency, we see why it’s not as simple as “just walk away.”
This scene establishes that there is a reason that Renfield was drawn to him in the first place, there is a vulnerability that Dracula exploited, and it’s not altruistic, it’s a little selfish!! And that’s okay!! Renfield still isn’t shown as deserving the abuse because of it, and it’s clear that his own lack of self esteem and subsequent lust for power is a FLAW that he needs to OVERCOME in order to be FREE and JOYFUL. Giving up his power to Dracula and BEING a poor little meow meow who can’t do anything is PART OF what started the cycle of abuse in the first place, allowed Dracula to take advantage of him, and perpetuates the cycle. In taking his power back, acknowledging his own weakness but affirming his own strength, Renfield can leave, move on, and find joy.
It preserves Renfield’s agency in a way I don’t know if I’ve seen before!!!! That’s pretty fucking nuanced for a slapstick gore comedy!!!!!!
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it goes without saying that i believe uriel screamed and sobbed over his siblings as he killed them. growing more and more bitter as the brothers and sisters turn their backs on him. his understanding of lucifer only growing as he is left again and again with no choice but to lash out in defense of himself, because if any angel he's talked to says no to his offer and he lets them go, then heaven will immediately strike him down. he just wants someone to agree with him. there is no god above, and what's left of heaven sends angel to the slaughter or tortures them. from where uriel's standing, lucifer is not the best of two bad options, lucifer is the only option they have that will protect angels. uriel knows this and no one is listening to him.
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No Escape In Death
Cover your body
and they’ll sexualize your arms and legs
Cover your limbs
and they’ll sexualize your wrists and ankles
Cover your joints
and they’ll sexualize your hands and feet
Cover your hands and feet
and they’ll sexualize your hair
Cover your hair
and they’ll sexualize your face
Cover your face
and they’ll sexualize your voice
Stop speaking
and they’ll sexualize your scent
Kill yourscent
and they’ll sexualize your dead body
-ME
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Its all "ai bad" but not nearly enough of you talk about how the ai is a motherfucking coward.
Like, what I use the ai for is my business. I don't want some cooperate asswipe telling me how to live my life.
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so i just got TGCF 6
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vincent perotta was such an interesting unsub, more so because of how he reacted when hotch dug up his past. the way he asked "some people?" as if he was sad that he ended up like that, but apparently its not obligatory. like there was hope??
idk it was so interesting. he probably thought torturing and killing ppl is just normal, its what his brain responds to, i bet it makes him feel alive and in control in a way he never was under his fathers roof.
and i think his and hotch's moment was so good. their relationship needs to be explored more, theres so much there
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Did I ever post it
Did I ever mention that I have a suit (Is this even classified as suit-)
I don't think I did
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Jessamine is Passionate About Fictional AI Sentience But Not Real AI Sentience: An Essay
one thing about me is when it comes to talk of "sentient" AI irl i 100% don't buy it like technology is not that advanced and being able to act like a person doesn't make it a person, however whenever there's a question about if a fictional AI character is sentient i will go to bat for that character's humanity 100% of a time like fuck you they have just as much of a right to personhood as anyone else
i think it's bc in fiction like. all of these characters are fake, so distinguishing between which characters are fake-real and fake-fake is like. why limit yourself to what could happen in our world. like if we're already dealing with a universe where aliens/magic/etc. exists, why can't this android justifiably be as human as anyone else? plus irl almost all AI software is developed as part of this capitalistic hell structure we're in. no matter how "real" or "human" it feels, its function is to make you contribute to its creators' wealth, and its inability to go against this nature can't help but make it feel hollow and inhuman. however, all the best AI characters in fiction are able to go against their designated purpose, often being defined by it, and often being villainized for it
in our real world, the AI's "immoral" "behavior" is a product of it being a Things that serves capitalism. it's not making choices based on a sense of self beyond what it has been told to prioritize, and a lot of times this lack of human judgment can lead to terrible consequences (e.g. mental health AI chatbots that cannot accurately judge a situation and give appropriate advice, employed because it's cheaper than hiring human staff). but in fiction? AI's immoral behavior is frequently a product of it going against its designated purpose, seeing itself as a person and having to make difficult and morally questionable choices in order to strive for the feelings of personhood and autonomy. this is a far more interesting situation ethically (while an AI itself cannot be seen as morally responsible for its actions in our world, in fiction this AI wants to be a person so badly it's willing to commit moral wrongs to achieve its goal, despite the fact that true personhood would allow it to be seen as morally responsible for these crimes) which i think is also why AI characters, especially those that, y'know, kill people, are often very polarizing figures. this conversation can even be taken a step further into the "liking a fictional character does not mean condoning their actions" discourse, but i also often think about well, if you were in the position of this AI character, would you have done the same?
personally i've always found it very easy to empathize with "artificial" characters like clones, robots, etc. and fictional AI is no different. yes, if you're watching a piece of media and expecting the logic of our world, the AI is fake, and incapable of being a person. but if you're watching a piece of media with the goal of emotionally connecting to fictional characters (who are all inherently fake) and exploring universal themes through a heightened setting, AI characters are one of the most interesting tropes to explore this with. personally, I love AI characters because there's something so vivid about knowing you were designed for a specific purpose/life path and ultimately realizing that's not the life you, personally, want to live. your designers and the world around you doesn't even recognize you as a being that should be capable of wanting anything, much less something completely different, so achieving the life you want is an uphill battle of convincing others of your humanity and, when that often isn't possible, having to resort to the most extreme tactics to claw your way out of the life you were supposed to lead. you know no matter how close you get to this ideal life, there's always going to be some part of you that keeps others from perceiving you as "human", but you learn to embrace that and see every mundane experience as a major achievement
this narrative is especially relatable to me as a neurodivergent/nonbinary person, but i think it can be relatable for many different marginalized identities in different ways, or anyone whose "humanity" has been something often denied to them. but because people are often expecting fictional AI to follow the same logic as actual AI, when i defend robot characters who want to kill their human creators, people give me weird looks like i'm advocating for that in real life. listen, if our current AI situation feasibly produced an AI who was invented for one specific purpose but somehow fucking hated her job and was able to pursue a new life and was also queer (all without any of this being by design) then hell yeah i support her, but that's not what's happening. and in our current capitalistic chatbot hellscape where every company wants to convince you that you're chatting with a super intelligent AI friend to get you to pay for a premium membership, sometimes you have to hold fiction and reality to different standards and enjoy this story about a quest for humanity while also accepting that the people this journey applies to in our real world are often the ones being taken advantage of in our increasingly AI-dominated real world.
idk this was originally supposed to be a short post about how it's funny that i'm so goddamn passionate about AI characters in media while also not being into AI in the real world, but then i got thinking about why this is specifically and came to an interesting conclusion imo. tbh it's very surprising that i don't currently have any of my own projects featuring AI characters fighting for their own humanity bc it's a theme i love so much that i've rarely seen done right and i have so many opinions on it. maybe i will write something about this at some point, but for now if you have any pieces of media you enjoy with AI who are absolutely worthy of personhood pls send them my way!
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skip black sails season 1 this and skip mash seasons 1-3 that, it simply seems odd to not watch the establishing parts of a story the first time you watch said story because they aren’t as polished as later on (as they’re busy doing the establishing part), under the guise of considering them “less progressive”
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i just think michael gray is the most tragically complex character of all time
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