#yes they have chemistry but it also felt really out of nowhere and forced

[pinkcrocss]

What do you like about Marie and Jordan individually and what do you like about them as a pair?

Thank you for the ask! ❤️

For Marie, I just love her so much. First of all, I am always happy to see a black girl lead in any kind of diverse, non-stereotypical, non-sassy-side character role like this.

But I also appreciated how realistic she was. Like, I understood almost every choice she made. I saw people get mad at her at the start for not always doing the altruistic, "right thing", but for most people, self-preservation comes first. She didn't owe those other characters anything (especially after how they treated her) and I loved that she had a back bone and would actually talk back to people. But at her core, she is still a good person despite everything that has happened to her and still chooses not to be corrupted by Vought's influence once she understands the true material cost.

For Jordan, they're just such a nuanced character. One, I always have a soft-spot for the Lancer character archetype. The highly capable, second best, who can never quite out-do the main character (e.i. bakugo, reki (from sk8), Ron from HP (fuck jkr, but no other examples are coming to me atm)), and Jordan is just that. Like, yeah, they were kind of a bitch at the start, but it's so clear that they are secretly a softie and the world and their experiences have forced them to have a tough shell. Also, their powers as an allegory for gender identity, yes, it's on the nose (although, as someone who grew up reading 90s/2000s manga like Ranma 1/2, not that unheard of), but I think the show handled questions of their identity really well.

And finally for Limoreau...

idk where to start. tbh, as someone who has been hyper fixating on characters and ships since high school, I never really have a clear explanation of why I ship the characters I do. I either like it or I don't. But Limoreau is such a pleasant surprise because the chemistry was there from the start, but it felt like one of those queer dynamics that the writers would be too scared to pursue (think Arthur/merlin or Gojo/Geto). I think the fact that our MAIN PAIRING is a queer, interracial couple with no white people, shouldn't be as revolutionary as it is in 2023, but it is! I hope this is a positive direction for on-screen storytelling.

But also everyone loves a classic "enemies to lovers" (yes, I know they're not EtL in the true sense, but I consider Rivals-to-lovers as a subset of EtL, so I'm using it as an umbrella term). I think the reason people like EtL dynamics (Especially in het pairings) is that there is always an underlying respect beneath the "hatred". Like, to see someone as a threat, you have to see them as at least an equal.

It was clear from the start that Marie and Jordan were more alike than different and it was Vought and the corrupt nature of Godolkin pushing them to compete. They're both lonely in different ways, and I love the idea of them finding acceptance and a home with each other (Also all three actors are extremely attractive and have great chemistry, so that never hurts).

Do I wish their relationship had been paced out a bit more? Yes. But that was my issue with all of Gen V. I think the whole show would have benefitted from 12 eps, instead of 8, because development was needed in most areas.

I also just want to note, for all the people saying their relationship "came out of nowhere", I truly feel that if Marie looked like Erin Moriarty and Jordan looked like Chace Crawford, most people would have clocked the romance from the beginning, jus saying...

#gen v #marie moreau #jordan li #limoreau #asks #gen v prime

[br1ghtestlight]

Why do you not like Alex from BB, like in your opinion, what do you think is wrong with him and how would you fix him.

this is such a complicated question bcuz there isnt anything wrong with him as a CHARACTER he's not unfunny or annoying or anything its just like. okay its very clear that around season eight the writers realized that gene didnt have any friends his own age at school and didnt have ANY male friends he hung out with (not counting peter here bcuz we dont see him in very many episodes although im sure they're casual friends) he really only spends time with his sisters and their friends. they decided that they needed to give him a friend in his grade which would be FINE except they just like introduced him out of nowhere as a way to give gene a Masculine Male Friend and it wasnt like a character we've seen gene previously interact with or a background character he becomes closer with. like yeah technically they did the same thing with courtney but that was in SEASON THREE so it made more sense to introduce new classmates bcuz we hadn't spent a lot of time at their school yet and didnt know everybody. its completely out of nowhere and theyre just immediately like yes we're best friends now. and the next episode everybody acts like alex has been there the whole time. and yeah things can happens off screen but that excuse doesnt really work when THE WRITERS KNOW THAT THIS IS AN ANIMATED TV SERIES AND OFF SCREEN DOESNT ACTUALLY EXIST it just feels like such a forced relationship that they did purely bcuz they felt like they needed to and not because it was natural for gene's character development or personality and that annoys me

ALSO SINCE WHEN HAS GENE BEEN A NERD WHO LIKES PLAYING NERDY MATH WIZARD GAMES

personally i think there were many better ways to introduce a best friend if they wanted to do that (maybe courtney or peter both kids we already know gene is friends with in his grade) or a new kid at school who gene shows around and spends time with over a few episodes (like tina and tammy except not awful) either way u NEED to give their relationship more time to develop. louise and rudy are a great example of this bcuz they werent best friends right away. they casually hung out with each other over a period of time in different episodes and then EVENTUALLY them being closer makes sense bcuz u can tell they really bonded over their adventures vs with gene and alex its like okay here are these two characters they're best friends now. there isnt even chemistry between them if im being honest

yeah i would either introduce him way earlier in the show and give him more episodes where he's casually around gene or use another previously existing background character and give them a few episodes together. honestly i stand by my opinion that peter would've worked really great in alex's place bcuz they already interacted in multiple episodes and were in a band together

as for NOW there isnt really anything they could do to fix alex or make me like him i just think he was a poor writing decision and i would rather they just forget about him tbh

on a personal note in school i was best friends with a kid who reminds me of gene (except a lot quieter and more introverted. very sweet kid) and he didnt have any male friends he exclusively hung around girls (and mee :3) and he grew up to be a gay effeminate fat man so it feels almost like they're trying to erase certain aspects of gene's personality and make him less i dont know uhh gnc in that specific way and make him more of a stereotypical nerd which he has NEVER been. i dont think that was their intention but that kinda rubs me the wrong way too

there isnt anything wrong with liking alex or his character Personally i do not enjoy episodes with him in them and i feel like he was mostly a bad writing decision but luckily they dont bring him into episodes too often (although they didnt seem too interested in using secondary characters at all in season thirteen so who knows)

#sorry alex enjoyers i dont hate you i just hate what he represents <\3 #u cant just write a character in like that. that isnt how it WORKS #<- coming from a writer with some experience #ask #bob's burgers

[lydiaas]

I'm one of the people who didn't really see jiara in the first two seasons (love the ship, just had a different perception, not claiming I was 100% right) and I still don't get how people can say it's forced in a show where relationships are known to develop fast, and they had some establishing moments at the end of season 2 (the famous surf trip for example), and then had a whole month to reevaluate feelings in an environment that felt very freeing for both of them. Do I believe it might be fanservice? Maybe, I don't like following drama. But like, to argue that it came out of nowhere when they set up a perfectly reasonable development? I swear some people can't say they don't like a ship and move on, they also feel the need to ignore half the canon to justify it

I don't really understand the forced argument either. Forced to me would be changing who the characters fundamentally are to put them into a relationship that doesn't make sense for them. JJ and Kie have always been really compatible even if the show didn't create them with the ship in mind. They make sense together, to deny the chemistry there would be a disservice to the show, and to ignore the way the audience reacted to them would be foolish (some people like to ignore the mass popularity of jiara). And yeah, there is development. There are moments as early as the first episode that can be considered building blocks for jiara (and yes some of them may have been accidental and open to interpretation) to the point where you could now watch the show and see a steady arc.

I don't pay any mind to "jiara is fan service" arguments either because they always hinge on the idea that fan service is inherently bad which it isn't. People can call it forced or fan service or whatever they need to but personally I believe jiara has made the show better because it adds a beautiful complexity to both JJ and Kiara and it is the pairing that serves the characters best.

I'm not a hater (well..sometimes in private lmao) so I'll never understand the compulsion to constantly be commenting on something you don't ship. If I disliked a ship as much as some of these people seem to, I'd have stopped watching the show a long time ago. I wish people would remember that sometimes your hot take disparaging a ship could just stay in the drafts. Why yuck someone else's yum.

I'd love to hear about the different interpretations you had in the first 2 seasons if you wanted to share? My shipper goggles have been securely fastened since season 1 episode 1 so like to hear how other people view certain scenes/moments.

#i don't tend to seek out jiara hate #but sometimes i see it when people tag my work with it #but very rarely do I see hate that i feel is sympathetic to the story actually being told and the characters as they existm #anyway that's a lot of words #and I don't really talk about this much #obx #jiara #jj x kie #asks

[sextonsharpwinhalstead]

👏🏾👏🏾 Thank you for your words regarding the “WW comes first” trope. I know you’re sick of dealing with it like the rest of us but unfortunately, if it’s not called out, people will continue to be ignorant of this and it will continue to happen. As a black woman, I get exhausted seeing the same tired ass complaints from fans when the white male lead shows interest in a woc and you might as well forget it if they actually do become canon. You can literally copy and paste the things they say as to why they are against the ship across the different fandoms cause they all say the same thing when a woc particularly black woman is involved. All of a sudden we see the complaints where they start finding fault with the white male lead, things are written poorly especially the woc, they have empathy for the ww but hardly any for woc, the ship is forced even when they’ve been laying down the groundwork for that interracial ship to happen, the lack of chemistry argument or claiming there’s better chemistry with the ww even though we can see that’s not the case. The list goes on and on. Same shit, different fandom. The ww first trope is a thing and it’s frustrating cause it just adds to the toxicity that exists in fandoms. So these things need to be said cause obviously people aren’t getting the memo

Oh yes, the old usual's.

"I see them as more of a sibling, dynamic."

"I don't know what it is, but there's just something about her that I don't like."

"Wow, that came outta nowhere. I just don't see it."

"Why can't people just be single? Why does EVERYONE have to be together romantically?"

And when it's clear the white male love interest is into the black woman then comes the dissent from the other side, "Is he even really good enough for her?" or "She can do better than him."

The way people were tearing down Max on New Amsterdam because THE WRITERS were giving Helen less and less to do was wild to watch in real time. The fandom turned downright hostile last year when Sharpwin went canon which coincided when Leyren was starting to implode too. In hindsight they were sounding a very angry alarm about Helen's treatment but for some reason it was Max's fault.

Another bit on saw on the Youtube comments for the most recent ship of Billie and Conrad now has everyone beginning to shit on Conrad. When I tell you that that situation was handled in the best possible outcome considering they forced the WW first trope in there, but they are still angry they lost and to a certain extent I understand why. It's not just the entitlement it's the fact that his fascination, his need to want save and be with Cade was written and performed very overtly. His chemistry and most importantly his desire and need for Billie was performed covertly, because it was rooted in denial, internal conflict, and confusion and of course guilt. Which was why I say I won't forgive the writers anytime soon for the way they wrote that because they hand WW ammo and then pretend to be shocked when they start shooting. The wildest thing of all is they are trying to drag Conrad when his growth came while he was with Nic and even moreso after she died. Conrad in the beginning was not my favorite but they didn't care cause he wanted Nic.

There was also an incredibly unhinged black woman who turned on Grant Gustin in the first season of The Flash on Twitter because she felt like he wasn't protecting Candace enough and started calling Ezra Miller 'Her Flash" I've been out of that fandom for years but I wonder if she's gone quiet considering recent events around Ezra.

The fact that there are multiple blogs and hashtags with insert-character-name-defense squad or advocate is not some wild or unforeseen coincidence.

There was no reason to make Conrad and Cade a thing at all. They already did the WW First Trope with another woman who fans wouldn't have been as invested in. The same could be said of Max and Helen. The WW First trope was literally written in from the beginning because he was married but that didn't stop them from writing Widow-mom in there.

But none to me were as unnecessary as Jessie and Rick. I remember watching and being apart of the fandom and thinking, "Huh, there's all these whispers and rumors and excitement of Richonne going canon, why is he making out with this woman he just met in the garage?" Then she died and less than what an episode later he was with Michonne. WHY?! He also had a wife before Michonne was even a factor.

In the cases of Conrad, Max, and Rick there was a vested interest in who they would move on with after they were widowed.

I'm just so tired of it. And what's kind of wild is this isn't a hard trope to understand. WW also discuss The Fridging treatment and it's almost always about WW or at least that's the one's they advocate for and talk about. They largely CALL for the death of WOC on shows.

They complain all day about it but have they ever asked if there was any other WW on the show? Anyone else that gets to serve as representation or full view of white womanhood? Cause the answer is usually yes. But never for us.

So tired.

#ask sextonsharpwinhalstead #fandom problems #fandom racism #sharpwin #westallen #richonne #cobillie

[dndeceit]

Meta for the fic Never Have I Ever.

Most of what went into this fic was stuff that I had in mind writing Truth or Dare, but I couldn't find a way to fit it. I really wanted the first story to focus on Janus's friendships within the group as a whole, and while his break-up with Virgil was the inciting incident to a lot of his insecurities in that story, I didn't want to make it too much about that.

I was thinking I might find a way to incorporate it into the sequel if I wrote one, but Ace Week seemed like a good excuse to start writing it as shorter follow up, just a brief scene in between here and there. Of course, I didn't actually finish it in time for that, but I didn't finish the first fic for the event it was written for either...

(stuff past here is mostly just personal trivia about me as a writer)

When I was writing Truth or Dare, I needed a source of Drama™ to force Janus into his bad decision making, and trying to figure out what that was going to be wound up being the subject of a lot of frustration.

I'm aromantic, and not especially interested in writing or reading about romance, but when you're in fandoms and want to read about your blorbos, it can be really difficult to avoid it. And often, writing those love stories is what is going to get eyes on your fic in a way that helps make the effort put into fanwriting feel rewarding. I used to write a lot of romance in the past, and while it got me a lot of readers, it always felt like fitting Those Emotions in was taking up space in the story that distracted from what I actually wanted to be writing.

There's a lot to be said about how unconscious amatonormativity can work its way in where it isn't wanted, even if someone's not feeling pressured by it directly. Thankfully, I've never had to deal with feeling like I was broken or wrong for not wanting to find a partner, and I've never been in Virgil's position of having a friend for whom I felt like I had to 'fake it'.

But...it can be frustrating for me as a writer when romantic plots and subplots nudge their way into a story, because sometimes I'm left wondering: "Is this the story I really want to tell, or is this just there because it's a part of the writing 'formula' I've internalized?" Because I've noticed a lot of my stories, despite an intended gen focus, wind up with romantic chemistry hanging on the fringes that...it's just there. And it makes sense for the characters, but I don't particularly feel like seeing it all the way through to the end the way a reader is most likely expecting. And sometimes I'm worried about that coming off as a tease.

Truth or Dare kind of wound up being this messy snarl of a story, where the romance subplot is there, but it's buried far beneath the rest of it. And Janus and Virgil as exes is never going to not make sense to me, so that followed pretty easily. But I wanted the subject of the break up to be something where neither of them were really in the wrong, because that kind of drama is uncomfortable for me to write. So when I was trying to tease out the history between the different characters the idea of that being the root of the conflict...kind of just felt right.

TL;DL: Virgil's aromanticism troubles aren't a 1:1 projection, but they are a sort of commentary on my frustrations with amatonormativity butting its nose into my writing.

Also, yes, if all goes planned and I keep writing stories, expect a lot of them to have the romance subplot go absolutely nowhere. You've been warned.

#my fanfiction #writing meta #fanfiction meta #fic series: party games

[tangerinecherrygal]

Small S&B S2 rant for my two followers or; SOC and S&B shouldn't have been combined (opinion)

Hi, this is my opinion and if anyone here enjoyed both seasons then I'm so happy for you. There are things that I enjoy that my friends don't and them pointing that out isn't a personal attack on me. Different strokes for different folks :)

Ok, first, since season 1 I hated that they combined both series. The story between Alina and the crows was completely different and felt disjointed.

I do wanna say I have read the first S&B book and I don't think I'm finishing the series because, i didn't like the way it was written. I also couldn't finish season 2 for some of the reasons I'm going to list now. However, I'm still able to critique how the show felt and it felt messy.

The relationships: (Season 1 mostly)

The relationships between everybody but Mal and Alina felt very forced and sudden. Like when she kissed the Darkling I was like, you've talked for a total of 45 minutes??? and it feels like those were their only interactions. In the book it was also like that but I feel like if they just focused on the s&b storyline then the writers could rectify this.

Also the 15 minutes of Nina and Matthias and then they're in love?? Even if this is a backstory that isn't in the books they could explore it in a different show. That storyline was so interesting and could've easily been a show by itself. The same for the rest of the crows.

Kaz and Inej's interactions mostly involved Jesper (who I loved). So I didn't really feel the chemistry with them. Buuut... the friendship between them felt very real and was so fun to watch. These actors are so charming and suited the characters I think.

The pacing (Both):

Because they combined the storylines they couldn't explore the relationships much like I said before. Also, they couldn't show much development, especially Alina developing her powers. In the books they explained why she was so weak but didn't in the show. I think it was a nice point. (The analytical part of me wants to say it's a good allegory for how suppressing parts of yourself can wear you down. Since this is a YA series I feel like it still has life lessons so that's how I took it). They could have given us more time with Mal and Alina's friendship too, instead of those flashbacks. Alina getting 'over' Mal also felt like it came out of nowhere.

In season 2 it's even worse. Already in the first episode it felt like we had no time to settle into the new situation. Of course, it's going to be fast paced bc they're on the run. I'm talking about how it feels like I'm watching a a playlist of under 5 minute s&b then soc videos. I saw someone say that they were trying to combine all 6 other books. In the 8 episode slots that stupid Netflix gave them??? Ok guys.

Things they should have changed: When Alina got mad at Mal for not responding. It makes their friendship seem less authentic. Yes, I know she's quite young and scared (me too), but she's also able to be a bit rational. It's unbelievable that she wouldn't consider there may also be some other reason that he hasn't responded even if it's for a moment. If she maybe thought that he might not have been able to respond or if he was outside of the base camp and he couldn't get the letters yet. Then she could realize that she can't rely on him so much and needs to support herself. This would also make her confidence later feel more reasonable because it feels like she's working on it for herself.

More time with the Darkling in the first half. In the books I was annoyed that she went from being terrified of him to trusting him implicitly without much reason. Maybe if he was more involved with giving her advice then she might feel like she would be able to trust him.

Genya's hair. I can't deal with bad tv wigs, I think since I started being more interested in drag. This is a more petty thing but in the words of drag queen, Katya: If you have a fantasy show you're adapting for the screen, you can pull it together. If there is a fantasy world that you're adapting, [you've] got to say one thing, "this world is not real." This is not Ken Burns, we can take a little bit of liberty. We can do a low light, do a bang, we can experiment with some texture, we can make it whatever we want. Just make it look good. People get hung up on the good part. Like they could have at least given her some side swept bangs to hide the hairline. That was so twisted and evil I think. My girl was done so dirty.

This is more of a question. Why isn't Alina's surname Starkova?

The dialogue: What the hell? The downgrade between the writing from the previous season to this one. I'm not going back to watch and find exactly what I mean. But some of the dialogue felt so unedited and cringey. They are capable of snark and one-liners, they proved that in the first season. I think it was Nikolai that was the worst so far and the actor was working hard to make those lines work.

Finally, I hate you Netflix: (impromptu netflix rant)

I understand that most of the problems I mentioned could be fixed if they had more time. They could have a better chance of making the combined stories work. The other option is to keep the eight episodes and just adapt s&b.

The 8-10 episode format can't work for everything. GOT could do it but it takes a lot to pull that off for a fantasy show and not every production can do that with the constraints.

Also netflix clutches it's purse tight when it comes to non Stranger Things related content. $28m? For a FANTASY SHOW of a hugely successful book series? That's less than a single ST episode. Netflix open your purse girl, we know you have the money.

It's obvious they crammed a bunch of stuff into this season so if netflix cancels it, then they could have appealed to all the fans and wrapped it up. At the expense of quality :/. If netflix wouldn't cancel all their shows after one or two seasons, then i believe this wouldn't have happened. Idk how they expect to make legendary shows if they won't take that risk and let the fanbase gradually grow. That's how GOT, the office and breaking bad etc became so iconic.

I liked season one and thought it had a lot of potential. I was so disappointed that i didn't like this season.

#*gemma collins voice* these producers are fuckin idiots #wait I like my version lemme start an ao3 #wig rant #s&b season 2 #s&b s2 #s&b season 1 #shadow and bone #grishaverse #sab #shadow and bone netflix #grammar isn't real #especially at the end #impromptu netflix rant #the darkling #alina starkov #genya's wig was not giving #i laughed so much writing the wig part #i care about wigs ok #s&b spoilers #s&b #malina #six of crows #netflix is a joke

[twin-scars]

I wonder if Steve learned more about Nancy after season one, otherwise he’s just filling in the blanks of her personality himself. Because if he didn’t know her...(I mean, in season one he says she’s in band and she’s not, the only thing he really acknowledged was she was smart and beautiful) it just makes season four all the more sad.

It would mean the Nancy he’s in love with doesn’t exist, and the Nancy that does exist, doesn’t want him.

I’m not a Stancy fan by any means, but like, if the Duffers wanted to resurrect the love triangle so goddamned bad (which to me never really existed anyway--it’s not like Jonathan and Steve were competing for her affection), they could at least have made it make sense. Because it doesn’t. It comes out of nowhere. There were no bread crumbs or hints that Steve wanted Nancy back (I’m not counting the end of season two, they had just broken up). After season two, they don’t interact. At all.

In season four Nancy and Steve cared about each other, but it felt more platonic. Steve even suggests double-dating with him and Robin when Jonathan comes for a visit. It’s a friendly chat between them, but he keeps his distance (romantically). It’s only until Robin and Eddie start telling him he should get Nancy back does he start crossing the line. Robin and Eddie both misinterpret Nancy’s actions. Yes, she dove in after Steve when he got pulled under, but it wasn’t immediate. She did wait a few seconds and then dove in. But Nancy would do that for anyone. She would have bandaged anyone’s wounds. Because she cares about others. Even season one Steve knew that.

It felt very against Steve’s character when he steps over that line by confessing his dreams of the future to her. For some they think It was a little bit of a grey area when Steve and Nancy split and she got together with Jonathan, but even still you’d think Steve wouldn’t want to be that guy and break up someone’s relationship (even though that’s not what Jonathan did). Season two Steve was heartbroken for sure, but he was mature enough to realize Nancy wanted to be with someone else because she didn’t love him. Season three Steve was starting to move on. He fell hard for Robin and appeared to be ‘over’ Nancy.

It would be so different if Steve and Nancy were friends, but we’re given no evidence of it. Nancy is around Jonathan all the time. Why would she have feelings for Steve when during their whole relationship almost, she was wanting Jonathan? And we learn she only went back to Steve because Jonathan didn’t make a move. Why would Steve or Nancy want to go back to a relationship that was never all that great to begin with?

It seems like Steve really doesn’t know Nancy at all. A good indicator of that is back in season two, when Steve is discussing his future with her and she says nothing in response, because he just described the kind of life she wanted to avoid. This also means that Nancy doesn’t discuss what she wants in the future with Steve. She always seemed to go to Jonathan for the heavier/emotional topics.

Ultimately, the writers are telling and not actually showing anything between Steve and Nancy. If a writer has to tell their audience how to feel or think a certain way, it sucks the emotion right out of the story. Every interaction between Steve and Nancy felt kind of awkward, whereas with Nancy and Jonathan it felt natural and not forced. In season four Nancy had more chemistry with Robin than Steve lol

Eddie and Robin pushed Steve into thinking Nancy has feelings for him, but we know she doesn’t because when Jonathan shows up the world around her melts away. If she had feelings for Steve, that hug with Jonathan would not have been so enthusiastic. 

Having Stancy back together isn’t just a terrible step back for Steve and Nancy’s arcs, but it doesn’t make any logical sense.

At least Jonathan knows her and we can tell how much they mean to each other without them outright telling the audience.

#jancy #anti st*ncy #i'm just rambling

[caffeine-clouds]

Hi there, it's Carly again. I'm really sorry to do this, but I have to say it.

I really enjoyed Butterfly Effect when it started. While the story started off strong, the random romances and couples that were introduced later on ended up ruining the experience for me.

At the beginning, I was drawn in by the well-developed characters and the intriguing plot. The setting was also beautifully described, and I felt like I was transported into a completely different world. It was engaging and made it easy for me to get lost in the story.

However, as the story progressed, the introduction of random romantic relationships between characters felt forced and took away from the main plot. It seemed like you were trying to add unnecessary drama and conflict, which made the story feel disjointed and lost its focus. I couldn't help but feel like you were just trying to satisfy your own shipping of characters rather than focusing on what would serve the story best. It seemed like some of the romantic pairings were forced into the narrative without much thought, simply because you wanted them to be together.

The couples themselves also felt underdeveloped and lacked chemistry, making it difficult for me to care about their relationships. Instead of adding depth to the story, these romances distracted from the main plot and left me feeling unsatisfied with the overall experience.

As a reader, I wanted to be invested in the story and characters, not your personal preferences. Unfortunately, the random romances left me feeling like you were more concerned with your own satisfaction than the satisfaction of the readers.

Another issue that I had is the story is going on for too long. While the story started off strong, it's now dragging on, and I found myself losing interest.

The pacing of the story felt off, with too much time spent on minor details and not enough time devoted to the main plot. As a result, the story lost its momentum, and I found myself struggling to stay invested in the narrative. This also meant that some of the character arcs felt repetitive and predictable. There were times when I found myself wishing that the story would move on to something new, rather than revisiting the same conflicts and themes.

I still appreciate your creativity and the effort put into building the world and characters. I only wish that the random romances were not included and you just wrap it up already. Longer isn't better. All of this has ultimately took away from what could have been a great story.

I'm sorry, but I don't think I'll be reading anymore.

Hey again Carly! Hooo boy a lot to address here but I'm trying not to think it over for way longer than necessary, so here goes: I feel like a lot of your criticisms are legitimate, some are more of a matter of opinion - and that's okay! Like, if you don't wanna read this fic anymore because it went in a direction you weren't a fan of - that's cool, and I'm glad you felt comfortable to voice your critiques. I'm at a point with this fic where I'm realising that yes, pacing has been an issue. Should have looked for ways to condense things down, but I wanted to flesh too many things out and include certain ideas and yada-yada - you get to 40 chapters and the true plot is only really kicking off now. Definitely a product of it being my first long fic and over the months I've been working on it - Ive learnt a lot and there are a lot of things that I would change that I can't exactly now because I'm at the point of no return now pfft. The romance being forced in favour over the plot is not a point I quite I agree with? I mean Sonknux has been there throughout the whole thing, Tangle's got a little crush on Whisper but it's not shown to be anything deep - and Shadow and Rouge's relationship is in a vague area. Those are the only three ships that I put in the Ao3 tags, no romances came out of nowhere I don't think because they're not really written as proper relationships yet. I wouldn't say they've been to much of a course of conflict either, more of an undercurrent. I feel like in the recent chapters where we had downtime on Angel Island after the previous arc - these relationships came to the forefront for a bit while I tried to give them development.

But hey - opinions are opinions! And you're entitled to yours! But I agree with you frankly that the pacing has been bad, and I'm sorry for that - sorry to my readers for that. I'm at a point where I'm not sure how I want to continue the fic (i know the general plot points but again, it's super long - how do I condense?) - whether I even try, or maybe tackle it some other time with a rewrite - I don't know. But it's definitely a symptom of my amateur ass taking on too big of a project that I should have probably held off on. Probably why working on other fics has sounded more appealing for me lately (which have considerably better pacing and much shorter length) But thank you for the support on this fic while you were here <3 hopefullly some of my other writing will be able to interest you some day :)

[rainyhuman]

been seeing people have a lot of feelings about the second season and tbh as a poc i LOVED seeing victor's relationship with his parents. i just felt it was so accurate and it wasn't too much or too little. and i'm glad they talked about the privilege white lgbtq people have. i loved seeing victor's mom come around, it made me cry. the conversation about how you feel like your parents have given up so much for you and you dont deserve to go against them. like yes, victor's mother was homophobic but she changed, she came around. yes she should be held accountable for the homophobia but her growth and effort should also be acknowledged. like just knowing that my parents might come around is very hopeful and this is the first time i'm seeing rep that resonates with me. the conversation rahim and victor had in the dark room was so important in acknowledging that white people will never get it.

also OMFG the conversation his mom had with the priest AND with adrien aaaaa

#love victor #AAA dude the muslim rep im so happy about that!!!! #still don't know what to feel about the love triangle tho #also lake and lucy 👀👀👀 #AND pilar and felix aaaaa #also GOOD for mia #im glad shes figuring out her shit #also really happy felix's mom got the help she needed!!! #love victor spoilers #homophobia #tangent #but the only thing that really pissed me off in this season was the insertion of the love triangle. maybe just let victor be single and #friends with rahim #yes they have chemistry but it also felt really out of nowhere and forced #like i do agree with the point others are making in saying that not every gay person dates the first gay person they meet #bc that's exactly how it looks like #STILL REALLY EXCITED FOR THE MUSLIM GAY REP THO #forgot to mention... if someone is still reading this 😭😭😭 i was sad lake and felix broke up tho :(( i loved them together

[a-friendly-fangirl]

My thoughts on Sex Education, season 3.

⚠️⚠️⚠️SPOILERS⚠️⚠️⚠️

First of all, please try to remember that this is just my opinion. I'm nobody to judge whether the season was good or bad and I don't mean to hurt anyone.

With that being said, I'd like to begin by admitting that I liked these 8 episodes overall... but there were so many things that felt wrong to me.

I loved Jean's journey during her pregnancy and the way she tried to take care of everyone at the same time (although I kind of disliked Jakob for some things he said).

I loved Aimee and her desire to heal after the assault. The way she really wants to make her voice be heard was heartwarming and inspiring to me. Plus, her friendship with Maeve is one of the most beautiful I've ever watched (about this, I'll say something later on).

I loved Viv and her ambition that slowly became less important than her peers and their rights. She really wanted them to be happy in the end. I think that she didn't really understand how bad things with Hope were until the trip to France. And she redeemed herself in a great way.

I loved Lily and her journey towards acceptance of herself, even when others thought she was weird and silly. It was empowering seeing her so confident in the end.

I loved Adam's growth. It taught that even the most simple of passions can turn into something meaningful and that, no matter how bad you are, you can change.

Above all, I loved Maeve finally getting the chance to do something amazing for herself for once.

All of these things were wonderful, truly. But so many others I didn't like and I couldn't really understand as narrative choices.

Let me begin with the one I found the most annoying: Isaac's fake redemption arc. I know what you might say: "Of course you hate it! You ship Maeve and Otis!". Well, yes, I do. But it's not all about that. I might be exaggerating... but Isaac deleting Otis' message was beyond disrespectful to me. If you remember, at the beginning of the second season, Isaac was really mean to Maeve... but he had the opportunity to redeem himself. He had the chance to say he was sorry and to be a better person to her, even though he had been around for so little time. However, when it came to Otis to have the same opportunity, he decided that he wasn't worth it. Isaac, who didn't really know Otis, took away from him the chance to at least say that he was truly sorry for being such an ass to Maeve. But, what feels even worse to me is that he took away even Maeve's possibility to decide. We don't know how it would have gone, if Maeve had listen to what Otis had to say. Maybe she would have forgiven him. Maybe she would have still chosen Isaac, because Otis hurt her too much. Who knows what might have been? No one. And why? Because Isaac decided for everyone. And I don't care if he thought he was protecting Maeve or if he was angry. It. Was. Not. His. Choice. To. Make.

Also, I didn't really understand why Maeve wasn't as mad as I was with him. Sure, she stopped talking to him for a couple of days. But the moment she started to speak with him again, they hooked up. Too fast, too soon, in my opinion. He apologised? Sure. But so did Otis. And he didn't get to be so easily forgiven.

But let's move to the another point I have a lot to say about: Otis and Ruby. I really liked them together. I found them cute and funny. But still... Ruby struggled for real to accept Otis for who he is. And Otis acted the way she wanted to keep her close. For example, he shaved off his moustache for her. Now, most of the fandom hated that moustache... but again, Otis seemed to care a great deal for it. He kept repeating that he spent months growing it. But Ruby didn't like it. And he sacrificed something he was proud of for her. But okay, a lot of people would do something like that for their loved ones. But then he had to dress like her friends to fit in. To be fair, Ruby gave up that idea pretty soon... but she just reacted to Otis refusing to do it. If I had to make a comparison between her and another love interest (not Maeve, 'cause I'd be biased), I'd choose Ola, of course. She was putting pressure on him in other ways, but she never wanted him to be any different than who he was. Love, after all, means acceptance. And perhaps Ruby loved Otis for he saw the hardest part of her life, without judging her. I wish it could have been the same for him.

About this, I've noticed many people being disappointed in Otis not saying he loved her too, because it means that he was just using her. Well... no? I mean, he was the first one to admit that, if she was willing to give him more time, he might have learned to love her. Should he have made it clear to her earlier in the relationship? Sure! Can we condemn him for not feeling the same? Absolutely not! Feelings can't be forced. And I'm also sure that he thought he was done for good with Maeve. He suffocated the love he had for her so much that the clinic made him sick and that he admitted his feelings only when pressured by Maeve herself.

In conclusion, I think that Otis and Ruby might have had a wonderful friendship, if they were only given the chance. They have that kind of chemistry.

Talking about people who are better off as friends: in my opinion, that's all Maeve and Aimee will ever be. I honestly can't see anything romantic in them. The purity of their friendship means so much to me and it's, at least for me, so different from the "Friends who are more than friends" energy. We're so lucky to have such wonderful actresses to play these characters... and what I see in their gestures and glances tells me of a great friendship. They're so different from Emily and Sue in Dickinson (they're supposed to be just friends, but they're clearly not) or even Judy and Jen in Dead To Me (another pair of friends that can be ambiguous with each other).

Moving to another couple, whose development I didn't understand: Adam and Eric. I'm not a great fan of their relationship. I like them both as individuals. But the bully-victim dynamic they used to have wasn't the best one to start a relationship with. I could see the appeal though. So much that, I was truly happy for them, when they said their first I love you's. And every step Adam made in the right direction made me smile, since that it took him a long time to grow up. Eric seemed happy with him too. Until he went to Nigeria. I sincerely loved the whole trip... but something felt wrong in him founding what he truly wanted there, where he couldn't even tell his family he had a boyfriend. The scene in the taxi gave me chills. I felt the risk he was taking by going with a stranger to a gay club. A stranger that he kissed almost out of nowhere (whether it was the heat of the moment or Adam not replying to him, I'm not sure). It's the second time he cheats on his boyfriend. And I think Eric deserves far better as a character.

My question about this whole drama is: "How come Eric found out that he wanted to be free in Nigeria and not in England?". If it's true that going to the club made him realise he wanted to be among people like him, it makes the whole situation even more absurd. Because there are plenty of gay bars and clubs in England. Why not go to one of them? My theory is that they wanted to build a good romance with Adam, then build tension between them and in us and end the whole thing with their breakup (probably to make Adam fall in love with Rahim).

I swear I'm almost done. I want to discuss one last topic with you all.

Maeve going to America like that felt so rushed. It's probably another strategy to make us want to see more of the show. And it surely worked. But still, it has, at least for how they developed it, nothing to do with Maeve maturing. The idea itself was amazing. I loved her getting the opportunity of a lifetime. But she literally decides to go the evening before (which is not even realistic. In real life, you have a deadline until which you can pay to go wherever you want. If you don't, your place is given to someone else), after getting the money from her mother. Now, where does that money come from? She might as well have stolen it, since she didn't have it before. In my opinion, this part of the story could have gone differently with little effort and the same outcome. How? Well, since that basically everyone thought she deserved to go to America, why couldn't have her classmates and teachers organised a fundraiser? Even in secret, so that she couldn't get angry for their "charity". It would have been so much better and so wholesome to see everyone in that school give a little sum for her, even to thank her for the help they got from the clinic.

Anyway, I'm so sorry for talking so much, but this season didn't go as expected and I truly needed to vent :P.

Thank you for listening❤

#sex education #sex ed netflix #sex ed #sex ed s3 #maeve x otis #otis milburn #otis x maeve #maeve wiley #jean milburn #ola nyman #isaac goodwin #ruby matthews #eric effiong #adam groff #asa butterfield #emma mackey #ncuti gatwa

[sevenstarsinning]

Sweat

Ch. 1 - Ch. 2 - Ch. 3 - Ch. 4 - Ch. 5 - Ch. 6 - Ch. 7 - Ch. 8 - Ch. 9 Ch. 10 Ch. 11

Chapter 12

The faint sound of birds chirping pulled you from a heavy sleep, forcing you to shy away from the brightness of the sun and turn directly into a broad chest. Your eyes flitted open, curious when Vegeta had returned home and how exactly you got home, but it wasn't Vegeta and you weren't at home.

"Goku?! Fuck." You sat up instantly, recognizing precisely where you were.

"What's wrong?" He sat up with you, immediately on alert.

"What's wrong?! I'm here, that's what's wrong. Why am I in your bed?!" You started to panic.

"You passed out and Kyla said to make sure you got to bed after I dropped her off." He explained.

"She probably meant my bed, Goku. Not yours." You scrambled out of the bed, in full panic at the fact that you'd spent the night with Goku.

"I didn't think Vegeta would like me showing up in your bedroom with you in my arms. Plus, I-I missed having you here." He admitted.

"Goku, I know this hasn't been easy on you, but you can't just-"

"I slept last night. I don't sleep when you're not here." Goku climbed off the bed and stopped you from putting your shoes on, "I don't want you to go."

"Goku, I'm with Vegeta."

"But he doesn't need you like I do. He doesn't want to spend every second with you."

You let out a soft sigh, feeling even more conflicted by the second.

"Goku, I-" Before you could finish your sentence he cupped your face and kissed you.

You pulled back instantly, staring up at him in disbelief, but you couldn't stop yourself. You threw your arms around him and pressed your lips to his again. He pushed you back against the wall, hands gripping your hips as his tongue slipped between your lips. Everything about him was so soft, so sweet and perfect, it was hard not to get wrapped up in him.

"Stay with me. Please?" He begged softly against your lips between kisses.

"I- I can't." You said, feeling like you were breaking his heart all over again.

He stopped kissing you and pressed his forehead to yours, "I know. I just wanted to ask again."

"This was a bad idea. All of it." You admitted.

"I can take you home now if you want?" He stepped back from you.

"That's also a bad idea. We need more time, Goku. I think at least for a while, we should stay apart." As you said the words they almost tore your heart out completely and you could only guess how it felt for him.

"Okay. If that's what you want." He said, barely audible with his head hung low.

The ride home in the cab was heavy, every ounce of your being telling you to go back, to leap into his arms and never leave, but it wasn't that simple. You took a deep breath before you pushed the front door open, almost running straight into the wall of muscle and anger known as Vegeta.

He squeezed past you with nothing but a glare on his face and headed outside.

"Wait, can we talk? I... I'm sorry about not coming home. I started drinking and I ended up passing out," you explained, hopeful he wouldn't ask where you stayed. At least, that's what you thought you wanted until you realized he didn't care enough to ask.

"I'll be home later, we can talk then if you're even here."

"Can't you skip training so we can figure out whatever is going on between us?" You tried to keep calm and not start crying, but the entire fucked up situation was too much to process.

"I'm not training, that ridiculous Bulma woman is making me clean up the mess I made of the gravity chamber last night," he grumbled.

"Wait, what? You're skipping training to help Bulma?" You asked, brow furrowed at how ridiculous the idea was.

"Only so it'll shut her up," he added. The surly prince crossed his arms and let out a heavy sigh.

You knew there was absolutely no reason you should be jealous, or that you even had a right to be, but you couldn't shake the feeling.

"Can I come with you? We can talk on the way."

"No. You'll only slow me down." He shot you down quickly.

"I really want you to stay so we can talk about this stuff." You pushed, needing him to stay.

"Talking got us nowhere last time. I see no point in continuing the process over and over again."

"What other choice do we have, Vegeta? If we don't figure this out... " you trailed off. Neither of you needed to say what you knew was true. Something had to change or the relationship was going to be over before you ever got to fully enjoy it.

"I'll be home later," he said again.

He left without another word. You stood there, feeling empty and alone. You wanted to force him to stay, to hash things out, but honestly, what else was there to say? Your relationship began with him cheating on Kyla and with you fucking his friend.

"How dire is my situation if I'm considering day drinking?" You asked when Kyla answered her phone. Somehow, you had already adjusted to having her in your life as a friend rather than an enemy. Kyla without Vegeta was a drastically different person. Or perhaps you just never saw her as anything more than Vegeta's bitchy girlfriend.

"Well, that depends. If you're drinking right now, I'd say it's pretty fucking dire. At 5pm? Not so much," she answered without missing a beat.

"Damn. That's what I thought." You sighed.

"Dickhead do something?" She asked.

"Kind of, but not really. I spent the night with Goku and-"

"Hold the fuck up. You spent the night where?" She interrupted.

"He didn't take me home last night. We just slept, but we kissed this morning." You wanted to go back to that moment.

"And now Vegeta doesn't want to talk and he's over at Bulma's helping her with something. All of this makes me want to drink." You sighed.

"Fuck, it makes me want to drink." She said.

"I really don't know what to do anymore. I thought I could ignore the feelings for Goku, but they just keep getting stronger."

"If you want to really figure out how you're feeling and what you want, alcohol isn't the best option." Kyla said.

"When did you become the voice of reason here?" You knew she was right.

"When I started letting Yamcha hit it and found out he really is just empty space." She said with full seriousness.

"Apparently we both need a break from the bullshit."

"We've tried that two nights in a row. Both nights we ended up getting trashed with Goku and I'm pretty sure the three of us would've fucked last night on the baseball field if you two weren't hopelessly in love with each other," she said in one breath.

"We're not hopelessly in love." You argued.

"Oh, do you have evidence that you're not?" She shot back.

"Yes, I'm with Vegeta." You said simply.

"You do know that's not really helping your case, right? You can be with someone but still love someone else."

"Okay, well, we aren't hopelessly in love because Goku doesn't understand the concept." You felt like you were grasping at any defense.

"He may not understand the concept, but he understands what he feels, which is complete devotion to you." Kyla said.

"Goddamn it." You sighed.

"We can do this all day but you haven't given me a vaild reason against it. You also haven't mentioned actually being in love with Vegeta either."

"You're relentless, Kyla, goddamn." Your chest heaved and you let out a long, slow breath.

"Yeah, at some point I actually started to care about this shitstorm. Seeing Goku like this really tugs at those annoying heartstrings."

"What if you're right about me and Vegeta? The whole sexual attraction mistaken for feelings thing." You cringed at the mere thought.

"Then you have a choice to make. Stay with him despite knowing there are no real feelings there, or end things as they are before it gets any more complicated."

Everything she was saying was spot on, but you couldn't sift through the feelings without worrying you were wrong or making a mistake.

After your conversation with Kyla you tried to find something else to focus on. You cleaned the house from top to bottom, showered, cooked lunch, and even organized your bookshelf. By the time you finished you'd actively spent your time avoiding the topic of your love life, but the second you sat down, it all came flooding back.

You frantically searched for something else to keep your mind busy, but you came up empty. After collapsing on the couch, you began flipping through the channels on the tv, settling on one of your favorite movies that you'd seen a million times before but still loved. You focused on the movie and the insane chemistry between the two actors, finding yourself getting drawn in to the sex scene as it unfolded. Your fingers dipped beneath the waistband of your panties as you felt yourself getting more turned on by the second.

You closed your eyes and thought about the last time you had sex, how rough Vegeta was with you, how he bit you. Soft moans escaped your lips as your fingers circled your clit. Images of Vegeta crawling up your body, eyes hungrily gazing up at you. You rolled your hips against your hand, Vegeta faded and Goku replaced him. His sweet smile never failed to leave you weak. The way he could  be rough with you and gentle right after was a balance no else could achieve, at least not in your experience. You were already getting close to coming just from the mental image of Goku on top of you, thrusting into you with the perfect amount of force. It wasn't any special saiyan form, just him. That was all you needed.

You bit your lip to hold back the moan, knowing which name you were close to screaming. It was all so confusing and complex. You focused more on how perfectly Goku fucked you, how quickly he'd learned how to work your body to give you the best orgasms. Your fingers moved faster as you neared your release, short breathy moans escaping your lips along with broken remnants of a name.

"Fuck... Goku..." you whimpered as you finally let go.

"Why did you even bother coming back?" Vegeta asked, ripping you away from the very private moment you were having.

Before your brain could process just how bad your next words were going to sound, you blurted them out. "I don't know."

"Foolish human. You don't know what you want- "

"Fuck off, Vegeta. This isn't one sided and you know it," you snapped.

"Don't assume you know what's going on in my head, woman. I was fine with whatever this is, you've been the one ruining it," he shouted back.

"Whatever this is? It's called a fucking relationship, Vegeta. Or maybe it was just sex for you and I was stupid enough to believe it was something more!"

It hurt to watch your relationship with him deteriorate so quickly, but you didn't cry like you expected. You did start to think it was mostly a physical attraction, but that wasn't something you were ready to admit.

"It is something more, you frustrating woman! I want you around more than anyone else on this pathetic planet," he roared, revealing more of his feelings than you expected.

"Then why weren't you here? Why have I spent the majority of our relationship either alone or with your ex?" You stared back at him, waiting for some explosion of anger.

"You chose to strike up that friendship with Kyla, not me. And you were well aware of how I spent my time but you couldn't be satisfied with that." He said.

You stood up and approached him, "I wasn't satisfied with seeing my boyfriend every now and then and having to beg him to stay home. I need more than that, Vegeta." You hated to admit how much you needed reassurance, affection, but it was the truth.

"I'm not going to be the weak, clingy boyfriend you want. You'd think your new friend would've caught you up on that little detail." He said.

"I don't want clingy, Vegeta, I just want  you to be here, at least half the time." You felt like you were begging for basic attention.

"You're the one who pursued me, you wanted this."

"I didn't fucking want this. And I remember you being the one to kiss me first and then fuck me to prove whatever power, dominance thing to Goku."

He made two easy strides towards you, "don't act like you're innocent in any of this. You were jealous of Kyla from the second we started dating and I was no longer looking in your direction."

"Oh I'm far from fucking innocent, I know that." You had been carrying the guilt with you since day one.

"What do you want, woman? Just tell me what you want." He asked.

"I-I don't know anymore. I thought I wanted this, you, but now it just all seems so fucking... fucked. What about you? What do you want?"

"I'm not answering the question for you. You either want to be with me or you don't. It's that simple." He crossed his arms.

"It's not simple though." You shook your head, everything seeming more complex by the second.

"Then I'll make it simple."

In one swift movement, he had your body pressed against his and kissed you like he never did before. You could feel his need, and it threw you off. For a second, you thought it was an accident. But you knew the mighty prince of all Saiyans, if he let that little trace of emotion through, it was because he wanted you to know.

You kissed him back, feeling the ache in your chest growing. You wanted Vegeta, or at least you wanted to want him. Seeing him vulnerable like this was almost too much to take, especially when all it did was make you even more confused. But you continued to kiss him, hoping things would suddenly become clear, that you'd know the answer instantly.

You pulled yourself away abruptly, "I-I don't know. I- this isn't helping. I just need some time to think."

Vegeta's expression quickly turned from a rare softness back into stoic and brooding.

"When you figure out what the hell it is that you want, let me know." He stormed out of the house, slamming the door behind him.

His words echoed through the night, circling your mind as you fixated on them. What did you want? Who did you want? It was a simple question, but there were no simple answers.

You tossed and turned, finally giving up on sleep. You resorted to standing in the living room having fake break up conversations with both of them. That only complicated the process of sorting through your feelings and you were left feeling more confused than you were before. Part of you wanted to work it out with Vegeta. He was willing to show a softer side, something you were desperate for.

Meanwhile, Goku was amazing, affectionate, and he wasn’t afraid to be vulnerable in front of you. There was a third option, your last resort if there was no clear decision. You could distance yourself from both of them. The question was, could you handle the pain of not having either of them?

#vegeta x reader #goku x reader #sweat fic #lynn #supremeleadershitlord

[juneviews]

axelle judges bl shows > Call It What You Want 1 & 2

/!\ SPOILERS AHEAD

shitty summary: James gets hired last minute to be the director of a new BL series. From the start though, things seem weird at the company, and they’re not eased by James starting a romance with the main actor of the series, Ait.

where to watch: gagaoolala | dramacool

grade: 7,5/10

pros:

- michael kittisak, man. I will talk about the acting too, but I needed to give this man a whole ass paragraph bc he carried the whole show on his shoulders. like, he’s without a doubt the number one reason why you should watch this. his acting is frankly so surprisingly amazing after having seen him in love sick & oxygen. he IS bas, without a single doubt, and every single one of his expressions, his movements & his words are so deeply painful. from the first season, bas was the most interesting part of the show. you could feel with one look at him that he was not okay, and season two really gave him even more character development. this performance is genuinely so impressive it might be one of my favorites of the year. I hope michael gets more roles bc he definitely deserves them.

- the story is really fucking important. not only is it about something that genuinely happened in the bl industry, something that the director himself was a witness to, but it’s a great change from bl shows that notoriously tend to romanticize s*xual assault. it was really important to show a male victim of sexual assault & have a series try to do him justice. the show also calls out other toxic bl practices, like bas being the “top” & having to stay fit bc of it, only ingesting chicken shakes & messing up his digestive system bc of it, for example.

- the acting was honestly solid from everyone, and when it felt weird I honestly believe it was due to the kinda weird writing more than the actors’ actual skills.

- the chemistry was really good! both ships feel kinda forced ngl, they sorta start out of nowhere, yet even then the chemistry was really good from everyone.

- basmarco. even though again, they do feel a little forced, they were SO good. in so little scenes together, they managed to build such a beautiful foundation for a good relationship & it was really important for bas as a character to get this kind of love & support.

cons:

- jamesait, man. firstly I don’t like their relationship. it felt really forced that they would fall in love at first sight in that way when they met when james was introduced as ait’s director. moreover, ait being SO flirty & pushy felt so weird when he should want to preserve his career more than anything. I also think the choice to make THEM the main relationship, when clearly bas (and by extension marco) had a much stronger & WAY more meaningful storyline is pretty weird to me. especially when a director/actor relationship that happens while the filming of the series is taking place SCREAMS power imbalance. and yes here the power imbalance isn’t quite there since it’s ait who’s the one pushing the relationship, but frankly jamesait felt so out of place compared to the actual main storyline which is about s*xual assault at the hand of the more powerful. also james & ait as characters were... pretty annoying ngl. james is okay, he’s very bland despite being the main character, and he has no backbone & no problem acting like nothing is going on & working with a fucking r*pist......... but ait is even worse imo. again, he’s so pushy & weirdly written, and he has no clear goals or interesting character traits. he’s just there to be james’ love interest & be fucking annoying about it lol. he’s also got no problem working with a fucking r*pist, so fuck both of them.

- the writing is... pretty weird at times. there are scenes that are so strong & beautiful and that I LOVED, but some others... just aren’t it. for example, bas sending himself a picture of jamesait & accidentally exposing them was so random, and used only to get ait to be mad at bas & give bas one more reason to attempt s*icide. marco liking james served literally no purpose, and it being revealed so late into the second season felt pointless, especially since marco seemed to move on to bas real fast after that. and honestly the whole atmosphere of the show is kinda eerie & weird, which works in certain scenes bc again this is kind of a dark series, but also not in others that try to be funny (& fail, whoops.) I can just imagine how much better the series could’ve been with better writing, & it makes me pretty sad.

- the ending was SHIT. so much so that instead of being put in the previous paragraph, it gets its own. BIG SPOILER, but in the end the focus is put more on james & ait having a relationship that doesn’t fit the basait ship from the series they’re filming, THAN THE DIRECTOR OF THE COMPANY R*PING HIS ACTORS. like, yes, he gets exposed, but the whole ep leads up way more to james & ait coming out as a couple than the actual s*xual assault victims??? like who fucking cares about jamesait dating, this press conference should’ve been about bas & kaprao getting the justice they deserve. not have the company’s director get exposed in five seconds & then have the rest of the focus in that ep be on james & ait. it was just so anticlimactic to me, and frankly kinda undid all the good this show was trying to bring to the table in the first place.

would I rewatch it: hm... maybe

Overall this is a really flawed show, but I also still think it’s a pretty important one. I’m glad that some bl shows are breaking the usual mold to call out actual issues faced in the bl industry, and just for that I would recommend this series.

#call it what you want #call it what you want 2 #call it what you want the series #axelle judges bl shows #bypiningbisexuals

[tinyboxxtink]

Build Me Up Buttercup *Part 9*

Weeeee!!!! Here we go, getting close to the end guys. 

I’m glad so many people like it, it makes me happy. 

Okay okay enough sappiness, we’re not dead yet.

Oh and gotta tag: @wanniiieeee 

If you need to catch up:

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Part 8

Finale

Epilogue

“...Soooo, are we hoping he shows up, or not?” 

Once again, your BFF was there to hear the latest escapades of the saga unfolding. 

“Obviously NOT,” You scoffed, falling back onto the bed. It was stiff, almost…crusty. You tried desperately not to think about just what exactly went on in these rooms on a normal basis.

“Because….?”

“Because I don’t wanna just BANG IT OUT, that’s why!” you exclaimed, wondering why that wasn’t blatantly obvious.

“Yeah but didn’t you say that Barba said that he was still gonna care about you, even after sleeping with you?”

“Yeah…” you twirled your hair again.

“So then if he does come to you then you know he really does believe that, correct?” Your BFF pointed out.

“But what if he doesn’t?”

“Oh come on, you think that Barba would just have sex with you to prove a point to your sergeant?” 

“I mean, what if he doesn’t care about me after, y’know...we fuck,” You said blatantly.  

“Seriously?”

“Yes SERIOUSLY. Come on babe this has all happened SO fast, I mean it can’t be anything other than physical attraction,” 

“You don’t believe that,” 

“Of course I do! Look at me! Metaphorically. Guys don’t ‘date’ me, they wanna fuck me and leave me.  

“Yeah, that’s usually because you fuck them before you give them even so much as a name, and then kick them out in the morning. Nice try,” Your BFF shot down your attempts to self deprecate.

“...Whatever,” 

“Look, I love you. I know you’ve been through hell and back. But, at some point you have gotta let the past be the past, and realize that you’re not that girl anymore. You’re not 16, you’re a grown up. And a smart, beautiful one at that. A guy could easily fall in love with you,” they assured you.

“In less than 24 hours,” you rolled your eyes.

“Okay maybe not love, but certainly more than a dicking. I mean Christ Y/N if that’s all he was after he wouldn’t have defended you to Liv, he would’ve just begged her to let him have a day pass to fuck you and move on!” 

“But, we’re so-- and he’s-- and I’m-- I just can’t see how we’re gonna…” You tried expressing your thoughts but it just wasn’t coming.

“Look, get out of your head. Just, stop. Stop overthinking it,”

“Yeah okay,” you said sarcastically.

Suddenly, there was a knock at your door. 

“Y/N?” you heard Rafael’s muffled voice outside. 

“SHIT,” You hissed into the phone, jumping off the bed.

“Is that him? I TOLD YOU,” your BFF laughed triumphantly. 

“Shut up. I’ll call you later.” you tossed the phone on the bed, fluffed your hair as if that was going to help the situation, and opened the door.

“Hey, can I…?” He motioned inside, leaning into the doorway. 

“First, I need you to be honest with me,” You put your hand up to his chest.

“Okay…”

“How drunk are you?”

“Seriously? I may not drink straight shots of tequila all the time, but that doesn’t mean I’m some old man lightweight,” he scoffed, very offended.

“That’s not an answer,” 

“...Honestly? I think I’m more buzzed off that kiss earlier,” he smirked.

Damn he was smooth. 

 You rolled your eyes and opened the door, letting him walk in. You motioned for him to sit on the bed, to which he replied, “Yeahh….I don’t think I’ll be sleeping anywhere tonight. God knows what is on these,” 

“Really? So how pray tell do you think we’re going to ‘bang it out’?” his head whipped around at that sentence.

“Christ almighty, again Y/N?! Privacy, google it,” 

“Oh whatever, you two were practically screaming in the parking lot,” you scoffed.

“I swear to God, you are so--”

“So what? Stupid? Immature?”

“Infuriating!” 

“Hello, kettle,”

“Oh really? How am I the bad guy here? Olivia sat there and basically called you a piece of ass, and I defended you!”

“And yet, here you are. Ready to fuck,” you presented your hands as if you were a platter. 

Rafael put his hands over his face and paced the room.

“Ay dios mio, me voy a suicidar,” he muttered while pacing. 

“Oh really, you wanna kill yourself? That’s a tad dramatic, counselor,” You scoffed again.

Rafael’s eyes widened, “You understood that?” 

“I heard suicide,” 

“Right...ok look,” he stopped pacing and stood in front of you, taking your hands in his.

“I’m not-- I don’t...want to just, ‘bang it out’,” He rolled his eyes at the notion. 

“But, also-- I don’t not want to….y’know,” He gestured towards the bed with his head. 

“...So you do, but you don’t,” you continued with the sarcasm. 

“It’s not JUST what I want to do, carino,”  he put a hand up to your cheek. 

“Cards on the table, I would love nothing more than to rip that shirt off and ravish you right here, until we have to leave in….Jesus, 7 hours,” He shook his head, knowing he was never going to sleep tonight either way this went. 

“Just not on the bed,” you half laughed.

“...Y’know what? For you, I would risk the thousands of venereal diseases that are seeped into these sheets,” 

“....How romantic,”

“If you really knew me you’d know that is the peak of romance,”

“See that’s the thing Rafael-- I don’t really know you. Not really. And you don’t know me. We just...I don’t know, we had this little chemistry thing going all day, and then y’know you cleaned me up when I was crying, and then held my hand through my story, and I--”

“And that’s why you wanna sleep with me,” he dropped his hands and stepped back from you.

Your face fell, your eyes widened. It had never occurred to you that he would be the one doubting the sincerity of the situation.

“What? Seriously?”

“You just said I don’t really know you, you don’t really know anything about me, except that I helped you through a difficult situation and now you wanna ‘repay’ me, or you feel attracted to me because I made you feel good,” 

Your jaw was on the floor; was he actually saying this? Was he this insecure this whole time?

“That is so not--” you tried to interject but he kept on.

“Then how do you explain it? This, this little attraction coming out of nowhere--”

“It didn’t come from nowhere,” you cut him off without thinking. 

“Excuse me?” he raised an eyebrow.

“Are you a moron, counselor?” you asked, to which he just stared at you dumbfounded.

“You honestly think that just because you dried my tears in a bathroom and held my hand through a story, that I would just throw caution to the wind and make a very obvious, romantic grand gesture? In front of my BOSS? Olivia could’ve fired me at any point today for ‘fraternization” or “unprofessionalism”, or a million other things that have run through my mind. You think that I would just risk my career because I thought you were nice?!”

Now it was Rafael’s jaw on the floor, flabbergasted at your sudden admission. He shook it off quickly, walking back up to you and caressed your face once again.

“So...you do have an insane crush on me?” he smirked.

“I wouldn’t go far as to say ‘insane’....spirited, maybe,” you blushed, making him grin like a kid in a candy store.

“AND, really to be honest it’s only been a subconscious thing, I think. But this morning at the gas station, something just…”

“Clicked,” he finished your sentence.

“Ye-Yeah,” You whispered, now once again stunned.

“Yeah…” he smiled, rubbing your jaw with his thumb. 

“So….what are we doing here, counselor?” You tried to keep your voice from wavering, but his hands on your face and the smell of his cologne was driving you nuts.

“We’re standing here, detective,” he smirked.

“Oh fuck off don’t be cute about this,” you hit his hands away at his snarkiness.

“But I’m so good at it,” he pulled on your hands playfully. 

“Alright what are we going to do about….” you gestured between the two of you.

“Well, I told you what I want to do,” he smirked again, pulling your face close to kiss you, but stopped mere millimeters from your lips. 

“BUT, I also don’t want to do something just because Olivia tells me to,” he pulled back quickly, amused at the annoyance on your face.

“So what, you wanna make out like teenagers? Wouldn’t that just be proving her point?” You scoffed, trying to hide the fact that you wanted to do so much more than that.

“I just...I don’t want us to...and then you--” he made hand gestures left and right.

“And then I? And then you!” you hit him softly. 

“No, not me. You think you’re the only one with a subconscious?” He raised an eyebrow, indicating he had always felt the same about you.

“So...neither of us, wants either of us, to change our minds,” you pulled him in closer once again, your arms wrapped around each other’s necks. 

“But both of us, assume that we will,” you continued, moving a hand to play with his collar sans tie, so that it was showing the tiniest bit of his chest.

“SO-- I propose this,” You patted the chest window with both hands. Rafael took this chance to grab them and keep them there, anxious to hear your proposal.

“We….have some fun,” you wagged your eyebrows suggestively. 

“And since both of us already think that the other one is gonna bail, we’re not gonna expect tomorrow to be any different, right?” 

“Right…” he held onto your hands, forcing you to balance back and forth on your toes. 

“And, if we both still feel the same when we get home…” you clung tighter to the collar, pulling yourself closer to his face.

“Then we do this. For real,” you whispered, staring him straight into his gorgeous green eyes.

“...And what happens when one of us changes our mind when we get to the city?” He brushed hair away from your face.

“Well then, I’ll just transfer units so you can get over me,” You gave him a tongued smile.

“Oh, I think you’ll be transferring to get over me, carino,” he smirked.

“What does that mean, by the way? I hope it’s nothing bad, considering you’ve called me it all day,” you asked, and he laughed. 

“No no no, not bad-- never,” He kissed your forehead.

“It means like, ‘sweetie’ or ‘honey’, it just sounds prettier in spanish,”

“It really does. To be honest you could call me trash in spanish and I’d still think it was sexy as hell,” you admitted, making him laugh louder.

“I would never call you basura, carino, EVER,” he assured you, going in for another kiss; this time, he didn’t stop. 

You both began kissing each other furiously, the crescendo of your wants from the entire day came spilling out all at once like a broken dam. Without thinking you jumped up and wrapped your legs around his waist. Surprised, he momentarily stumbled back, but quickly adjusted your weight in his grasp, pulling you tighter into him. You could feel his growing member against your thigh, and you couldn’t help but smile knowing you were the reason for it. All of a sudden you felt yourself falling back onto the bed, Rafael continuing to kiss you.

“Oh yeah sure just let me get the jizz germs on me,” you giggled in between kisses. In response, he crawled on you and moved you up closer to the headboard, his entire body now on top of you.

“Alright there, my body is full of jizz now too, happy?” he panted. 

“Yeah I know it is, I can feel it,” you smirked, grabbing his belt and tugging on his erection. He moaned, his eyes widening in shock and excitement.

This was it, no going back now….

#rafael barba #rafael barba x you #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba imagine #law and order special victims unit #law and order svu fanfiction #law and order svu #build me up buttercup

[somestansomewhere]

Debbie Gallagher: ALL Love Interests RANKED

Okay! I tried to rank all of Debs’ love interests and it was hard to do because I am not set on that ONE PERSON that I ship her with above all else, but these are my thoughts! Keep in mind that these are all MY OPINIONS and you are entitled to yours as well! Let’s talk about it! If you read all this ILY.

Here we go:

...................................

23. The Guy At The Pool (Season 5)

He thought Debs was special needs and she tried to flirt with him...

22. Kelly (Season 9-10)

I LOVE Kelly so much but she was not into Debbie! I really love her with Carl and Debbie should not have tried to interfere! I will however say that I really really REALLY enjoy their friendship and I wish that that would have continued on. They had some really good moments together.

20/21. Eugene (Season 6) & Board Game Guy (Season 7)

Alright so these two don’t technically count because Frank tried to set Debbie up with Eugene so that she’d be written into his will. And the Board Game Guy was from a deleted scene as one of Debbie’s “life partners” from that flyer she made. So enough said.

18/19. Tyler (Season 6) & Erika (Season 6)

Again, Frank attempted to set Debbie up with Tyler and while that “potential relationship” wasn’t as bad as what happened between her and Erika, I am grouping them together because Debbie wasn’t technically into either of them and it was set up to fail right from the start.

17. Larry (Season 6)

The pregnancy fetish guy! I’m not quite sure what the intentions were for this character in the long run but it was a funny joke in the episode he was in. Even in the beginning Larry gave off red flags, but Debbie was happy... until the truth was revealed. Weird.

16. Jared (Season 11)

Another irrelevant love interest: the gay guy that cheated on his husband with Debbie after giving her cocaine. Obvious issues with this encounter/plot line aside, I did feel that their interactions at the bar were flirtatious and I didn’t hate him.

15. Calista (Season 11)

ANOTHER irrelevant character that was used and never brought back!!! I didn’t totally hate her either, she was upfront about her ex-girlfriend and that whole situation. She helped Debbie and didn’t take advantage of her but the second she came on screen; I’m sorry but I did not give a fuck. Her last episode built up a potential friend/relationship opportunity for Debbie and they just did nothing with it. Idfk what else to say, not a fan but I did appreciate Calista trying to take care of Debbie when she clearly was drinking too much.

14. Sandy (Season 10-11)

Oh boy, everyone’s favorite partner of Debbie’s... Yeah, Sandy is so low on this list not necessarily because I didn’t like her for Debbie, or that I have beef with Elise (b/c I love her as an actor sm). I personally just hate the sheer fact that this character EXISTS in the first place. I never understood the hype, but I know that people only like her because she’s a Milkovich ie. related to Mickey. That’s the hard truth this fandom isn’t willing to admit. My disliking Sandy should be a post of its own but lemme get into her relationship with Debbie.

You could tell that Emma and Elise liked working together so the chemistry was sorta there (definitely not soulmate shit tho). Each time that they interacted in s10 I was over it. S11 was better in the sense that whether I would like to admit it or not, they did have some “cute moments” (mainly just Sandy calling Debbie babe/babes). The second shit hit the fan in regards to Sandy’s history, I immediately understood Debbie’s issue with her and why her character would not want to be with Sandy. But, with that being said, Debbie was also in the wrong because she made everything about herself throughout the entire course of this relationship! Sandy did call her out, ex: “who was supposed to take Franny to school?”, and things like that were nice. HOWEVER I am sorry to say, this relationship felt like a massive waste of time and it felt like they were trying to force something that shouldn’t have existed to begin with. I don’t have the patience to even analyze this anymore, but maybe down the line because clearly there is SO MUCH to delve into!

13. Alex (Season 9)

Omg I did not like this relationship/plotline at all. Alex had issues but Debbie was so inconsiderate! I never saw the appeal here! It was nice that Alex had the decency to go and help Debs with Ford after the fact. I just feel “meh” about this tho. They had moments but ultimately I personally wasn’t into it and Debbie’s random newfound self discovery of “lesbianism”.

12. Kyle (Season 3)

Emma Kenney’s first kiss! Kyle was a one episode character that did have the potential to be more than that. I didn’t hate the kid as Debbie’s love interest, but there also wasn’t anything special about him. He was just kinda there and then he left. Debbie really seemed to like him though, spelling his name in her peas, etc.. I do like that one line about cigarettes that Kyle had but again he was such a short lived character and when he turned out not to be related to Kevin it became unnecessary to keep him around... even if the episode alluded to him returning. They were sorta cute!

11. Claudia (Season 10)

So I didn’t like this relationship much either but there was a certain kind of stability in the relationship that felt organic and nice. Partly because I enjoyed watching Constance Zimmer and she made Claudia likeable. Do I ship it? No. Was it a problematic dynamic? Yes. Was it a tolerable relationship? Eh. I didn’t hate it entirely though. Debbie, being a Gallagher, eventually fucked it up. And while I did like the drama, Debbie wasn’t REALLY into Claudia as much as she may have believed she was. So, it totally felt like a one off that would end with Claudia not returning... and it was. So there was no time for an investment of any kind.

10. Hedi (Season 11)

Gosh... Debbie’s endgame(?). Hedi was introduced too late for me to care enough about her (At this point it would have made sense for Debbie to wind up with Calista because at least she was already introduced!). I don’t necessarily like Hedi as a character and quite frankly it was a “who tf does SHE think she is” kinda deal for me. At first I was interested and didn’t hate her (and I don’t), but then she “thought she was Jimmy” and I instantly got annoyed (LOL I GUESS it was a nice nod to him tho... I guess).

My (several) problems with Hedi as a character aside, there IS something about Hedi being presented as this “dangerous badass” who is (somehow) WORSE than Debbie, that worked well. I’m not a fan of the ship, but it is an interesting dynamic in the sense that Debbie could potentially be “living on the edge”. I fear for what trouble this could cause Debbie BUT it’s like Frank referenced: Monica vibes. I don’t think it’s “true love” like Debbie said to Franny. A constant storyline for Debbie has been “why can’t anyone ever love me” and so she falls in quickly. Maybe Hedi will leave her but that’s the thing, “she’s done worse” so idk, either way I don’t think it’s meant to last! But I guess I don’t mind them being together! Karma’s a bitch! Will Carl tell her what Arthur found? Would it even make a difference?

9. Julia (Season 10)

I would have actually rather preferred her with Carl too! It was never love between Debbie and Julia, but the relationship did create good conflict for my viewing pleasure. UNPOPULAR OPINION, I didn’t mind Julia as a character at all. She was fine for me. I also enjoyed how ultimately SHE was only using Debbie in the end. Julia does admit later on that she was experiencing with her sexuality so maybe she did have feelings for Debbie at one point, which I thought was interesting. Debbie got herself into this one. At least Julia was more age appropriate than Claudia... (which is ironic since Debbie got in trouble for being with Julia when the age gap is MUCH bigger between Claudia and Debbie LOL I love it)! I also found Julia annoying Debbie to be amusing, that’s not to say that I liked her a lot either cuz I don’t!

8. Matty (Season 4-5)

Man do I feel bad for Matty! Debbie raped him and it was horrible. From the get-go when Matty was introduced the relationship was hella awkward!! And not only that but Debbie was a MINOR! Matty did do the right thing and said they couldn’t be together but a part of me will always feel strange that he WAS INITIALLY attracted to Debbie before learning her age. That to me is still wildly inappropriate. He shoulda cut it off. He did try to be her friend and took her to that dance which was cute but ahhh this was just a MESS all around. Cringe. At least he didn’t take advantage.

7. Henry (Season 4)

Speaking of Matty and that dance, Henry was supposed to take her. He asked her as a joke in order for Seama to inflict revenge on Debbie. If that weren’t the case however... DAMN THEY WERE CUTE! The potential that this relationship could have had! If only it wasn’t all an act! It was a “day worth of love” and sure that’s not enough for two people to REALLY be IT, yet there was something charming about their connection that I wish was real. Or idk maybe Henry could have reconnected with her later and apologized and it could have been revealed that he did actually like her... but that wasn’t the case. Fuck him!

6. Simon (Season 1-2)

Debbie was NOT interested in Simon at all but at the time he was almost like the male version of her. Their banter back and forth was fun to watch and he probably would have treated her well. It’s unfortunate that we didn’t get to even see their friendship progress. Their interactions were funny and he was a good guy!

5. Batiste (Season 10)

Y’all may not understand why this guy is so high on the list but a part of me wishes this character wasn’t a one off. Batiste is the dude Debbie tried to return her “unused” shoes to. If you can recall, he wanted a blowjob to take advantage of her. While this was a dick move (and the plot went nowhere) a part of me would have liked to see more! He did have an arc where he acted like an ass and realized that it is wrong to degrade women. I just think it could have been built upon and Emma may have had chemistry with this actor. There was something here that I didn’t hate and I felt it could have been expanded upon.

4. Little Hank (Season 2-3)

Debbie’s first real crush! It was interesting to see how he didn’t like her at first and then a “friendship/relationship” slowly started to develop after he gave her flowers. IT JUST NEVER CONTINUED! Little Hank was in no way the most upstanding, but it was cool to see Carl have a friend that Debbie crushed on (when she was little she wasn’t intentionally taking something away from Carl ie. Kelly, so I support it). Their interactions were fun to watch too! The fandom definitely has a soft spot for Little Hank! And at one point everyone was rooting for them to be together. Too bad we never discovered what ended up happening to this character!

3. Neil (Season 7-8)

The bathtub scene tho! Adorable! There was a short moment within this relationship that was super cute where the two of them really did seem to care about each other and may have both been in love. It goes without saying that Debbie was only using him, but they did have SOME potential and they found a common ground where they each benefited each other’s needs. Debbie once again was TOO controlling and self absorbed to make it work, but I don’t think she was entirely happy in a relationship with him. He deserved more respect!

2. Derek (Season 5-8)

Baby Daddy! I really did enjoy them together until Debbie took advance of him and Franny came into the picture, but at the same time that’s one of the reasons that Derek, as a character, has a deeper connection to Debbie and the audience. I always enjoyed their flirting back and forth and the relationship they had (the deleted scene with the card/push up game ahh my heart)! Debbie really did mess up due to her desperation to “belong to a family”, which is another one of her consistent character traits. She just went too far and tried to trap him. Then shit got messed up between their families. Derek did eventually ask for parcial custody and did have a desire to be a part of Franny’s life. Debbie said no and that plot line died until s10. Pepa!! Ahh! RIP to Derek, it was sad to me that he died. Definitely a character and relationship that I wish was incorporated more because I truly enjoyed them together.

1. Duran (Season 8)

Besties with benefits! Stop! Nobody talks about my guy Duran! Sure they both said that this relationship was of a sexual nature and that they were just a couple of friends but damn! The chemistry and dynamic was palpable! It is truly a shame that we didn’t get to see more of this friendship! They were on common ground and really did care about each other! I don’t know why but I really just LOVED them together! Duran was also in her friend group with Farhad and that was a group that seemed to have a positive impact on Debbie as a person. S8 Debbie was cool! These two complemented each other so nicely! Duran wasn’t by any means the best influence on her because he almost lead Debbie down a “Monica path” but come on, Hedi is worse in that department. He was getting his life together like Debbie was with her profession. Just think of the hair convos Duran and Tami could have had Lol. Idk, I just like Debbie with him a lot! It was healthy to an extent and he was supportive of Debs with Franny.

#I could write so much more for each of these but I’ll spare you #guys nobody talks about the AMOUNT of love interests Debbie had over the course of this damn show #I miss characters with a lot of depth! #I want to do more of these relationship lists for other characters #my lists #my favs #shameless #gallavich #debbie gallagher #franny gallagher #sandy milkovich #debbie x sandy

[starbornvalkyrie]

what we could be | part four

A/N: I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to update this one! This part fought me hard, to be honest. It’s a little shorter than the previous parts, but I just had to get past it to move the story along. I’ll leave you with this: things have to get worse before they get better. Enjoy!

warnings: language, smut, alcohol.

to recap: part three | what we could be masterlist

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“What did you just say?

He heard a huff on the other end. “I know you’re not that dense, Rowan,” she growled, “You know exactly what I said.”

“But… but…” he stammered. So unlike him. “But how?”

“How? Hm, well, when a man and a woman both consent to it, they get naked, then the man takes his dick and--”

Rowan snapped. “Aelin, shut the fuck up, I’m not an idiot.”

“Coulda fooled me,” she mumbled, and Rowan let out a sigh.

“You’re pregnant.”

“About nine weeks, yes.”

Rowan paused. “And it’s mine?”

Aelin barked a laugh with no humor behind it. “Unless you’re also accusing me of cheating, then yes, it’s yours.”

“I’m just trying to make sense of it all,” he retorted. Rowan’s head is spinning. It feels strange, not being able to control his emotions. He wants to suggest they start the conversation over, a little more calmly.

But of course, it’s Aelin. She’s a firecracker on a good day, and he had to assume she hadn’t had a good day in a long, long while. “What is there to make sense of? We fucked, you didn’t pull out, and now I have another life form growing in my stomach.”

He was about to correct her on the location of the baby when his brain caught onto her tone. “Hold on. Are you… mad at me?” he asked, rubbing his temples to chase away the impending headache that was forming. 

“Yes! No… agh, I don’t know! Damn hormones…” She said that last part more to herself than to him, and he was starting to soften up to her mixed feelings when she yelled, “You got me pregnant!”

“Well, it takes two to tango, Aelin!”

“That doesn’t even make sense!”

“Gah, Aelin!” 

“Rowan!” She screamed so loudly, Rowan could have sworn he felt the sonic boom from across the ocean.

He had to remember who he was talking to, had to think about what she’s going through. As calmly as he could, though there was still a slight bite to his words, he said, “I think… I think I need some time to process this. Can I call you later?”

There was a pause so long that Rowan had to check to make sure the call hadn’t dropped. After a minute, he heard her take a deep breath, something he knew she did whenever she was trying to prevent herself from saying something stupid. Or mean. Or all of the above.

“Later… Got it. Bye, Rowan.” And she hung up. Rowan wasn’t sure how long he stood there with his phone still to his ear, but he pulled it away and stared at it, willing all the answers he wished he knew to appear from out of nowhere. When did he even stand up?

Aelin is pregnant.

Aelin is pregnant with his child.

From the sounds of it, she’s going to keep it. Gods, they hadn’t even gotten that far in the conversation.

Aelin is pregnant.

Rowan is going to be a father.

He thinks he’s going to be sick.

Deep breaths, Rowan.

Rowan waited until he was sure he wasn’t going to lose the sandwich he ate on the way home, then left to find Fenrys.

Fenrys will either know what to say or sit with him while he drowns himself in liquor. Either way, Rowan just needs his friend.

Rowan ran from his housing to Fenrys’ classroom on Mistward’s campus and got there just in time to see him flirting with one of his classmates.

“Moonbeam.”

Fenrys looked up at him and grinned. Rowan wasn't sure what his own face looked like, but he could see concern flash through Fenrys’ eyes. 

“Hey, Whitethorn, why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost?” Fenrys clapped Rowan on the shoulder, trying to lighten his mood.

“Aelin is pregnant.” Fenrys’ smile faltered, his grip tightened ever so slightly. He looked over his shoulder to tell his classmate he’ll catch up with her later then guided Rowan towards the edge of campus where the bars are. Rowan had never felt more grateful to have a friend like Fenrys.

They made their way to the hole-in-the-wall tavern they found their first week in Wendlyn. The bar food is subpar, but they have a top notch selection of beers on tap. Rowan, however, went straight for three shots of tequila then an old-fashioned to sip. Mixing tequila and whiskey at three in the afternoon probably wasn’t the smartest thing to do, but Rowan didn’t feel like being smart.

Fenrys waited until Rowan ordered his second old-fashioned before speaking. “So… Aelin is pregnant.” It wasn’t a question, but Rowan nodded. “Wow. Okay, um, how do you feel about that?”

Rowan took a long sip of his drink before answering. “I don’t know man, I haven’t really given myself time to process it. She called to tell me, we fought, we hung up. And now I’m here,” he lifted his glass. Drink. “Gods, I’m also pretty sure we broke up before I left for the program here.”

“What do you mean you’re ‘pretty sure’? Are you together or not? And what on earth did you have to fight about?” Rowan drank for every question Fenrys asked, finishing the glass. His brain was finally getting muddled, his racing thoughts becoming an ugly, incoherent blur. He signaled for another drink. 

“I don't know, man. We fought before I left, and I told her we’d talk when I got back to Terrasen. Whatever the fuck that was supposed to mean.” Rowan thought drinking with Fenrys would help him, but it actually might be pissing him off instead.

Before Fenrys could pester him some more, he tossed back the old-fashioned in one go, and stood up on shaky legs to leave. “Hey, let me help you get back, dude.”

“No, thanks, you’ve helped enough.” A hurt look flickered across Fenrys’ face, and Rowan felt guilty for a moment. It wasn’t his fault Rowan was in a shit mood, but he couldn’t do anything about it in this state. He made a mental note that he hoped he’ll remember to apologize and have an alcohol-free conversation with him later.

The walk back to his housing was a blur. Rowan had to stop multiple times to settle his stomach, but luckily he made it back without ruining the pristine Wendlyn sidewalks with his vomit. He had hardly sobered by the time he found his building.

Rowan’s feet took him in the opposite direction of his room, but he couldn’t do anything to stop it. He didn’t care to. Next thing he knew, Remelle opened the door to his incessant knocking for the second time that day. She looked like she was about to yell at him again, so Rowan grabbed the back of her head with one hand and her waist with the other and crashed his lips to hers. She didn’t protest.

He pushed her back into her room and slammed the door behind him. He led her towards her bed, clothes flying along the way. When she laid back against her pillows and spread her legs, he didn’t hesitate to climb on top of her and enter her roughly. There was no passion in their coupling, only the urge to release, to forget.

They stayed in bed through dinner, alternating between laying there, panting, and fucking each others’ brains out. It wasn’t until Rowan slid into Remelle for the third time that night that he let himself realize what he was doing--let himself realize that even though he was in bed with Remelle, he was imagining he was with a different blonde across the sea.

He pulled out of her abruptly, much to her dismay, and gathered his clothes. Not bothering to don his shirt, he ran back to his room.

In the privacy of his own quarters, in the silence with his thoughts, Rowan allowed himself to cry.

---

After Aelin’s conversation--if she could even call it that--with Rowan yesterday morning, she thought she’d panic. But instead, she felt hollow, alone. She didn’t know what she was supposed to expect. Whatever it was, it wasn’t that.

She’d spent the rest of the day in bed, only getting up when Lysandra forced her to eat something and to take a bath where she stayed for two hours.

She’d wished that her mother was there to tell her what to do next, but then she cried thinking that her parents would never meet their grandchild. Her baby would only know about Evalin and Rhoe through stories, her memories. She’d always thought that if she did one day find herself pregnant, she’d have her mother there to guide her.

But her mother was dead, Rowan couldn’t even speak to her, and Aelin was alone.

Eventually, Lysandra got sick of Aelin’s wallowing, no matter how supportive she was trying to be. Aelin thanked the gods for keeping Lysandra with her. When they had dinner last night, Lysandra suggested she needed to go out and do something to distract herself from the pit Rowan left in her heart.

At the same exact moment, she’d received a text from Chaol asking if she was feeling better.

Lysandra took that as a sign and urged her to reach out and reschedule their coffee date.

So here she was, sitting at a table in UT’s campus coffee shop. Aelin sipped on her lemon-ginger tea--not her favorite, but it helped her stomach--as she waited for Chaol to get out of his class. She couldn’t stop checking her phone for any messages from Rowan, but there were none. Even a quick Instagram search revealed he hadn’t been active since yesterday morning. With a sigh, she silenced her phone and put it in her purse.

After a few minutes of people watching through the window, she spotted Chaol’s tall figure coming from the chemistry building. Aelin waved at him as he entered and watched as he went to order before joining her.

“Aelin! I’m so glad we could meet. You’re feeling better?” He sat down across the table from her, but the table was small and his legs were so long, his knee brushed hers. The subtle touch made her blush, and she tried to keep the color at bay.

She smiled at him. “A little. Enough to be out and about, not enough to scarf down a whole chocolate cake no matter how badly I wanted to.” He laughed and the sound made her heart flip. Damn pregnancy hormones.

“Well, when you feel like you can eat again, I’ll gladly buy one for you.” He moved to grab something from his backpack-- a stack of papers. “I know this is the last thing you’d want to think about right now, but before I forget, these are the notes and everything from the lectures you missed. You still have to make up a lab, but the professor said you have until the end of next week.”

Aelin took the papers and thanked him. She suddenly felt guilty for how sweet he was being to her without knowing the extent of the situation she’s found herself in. She likes Chaol a lot and didn’t feel that it was fair to string him along.

“Can I actually--”

“So, Aelin--” They both spoke then broke off at the same time, chuckling at their synchronicity. “You can go first,” he said.

She released a steadying breath through her nose. “Okay, there was a reason I wanted to meet with you today. I have something to tell you, but I’m not entirely sure how you’ll react.”

“It’s alright, Aelin. You can tell me anything, I won’t judge.” Too sweet. Too damn sweet, this guy.

“Okay,” she repeated. “I- I’m pregnant.”

Aelin watched Chaol as he processed the bomb she just dropped. She noticed his eyes widen ever so slightly, his mouth gaped open. After a few agonizing moments, he shook his head to clear the daze. He was about to reply when the barista called his name to pick up his order. 

With an apologetic glance, Chaol stepped away. Aelin closed her eyes, mourning whatever could have happened between the two of them. She opened them when she heard Chaol take his seat across from her once more.

“So, you’re pregnant.”

“I am.”

“And I’m assuming… Rowan is the father.” She nodded apprehensively, knowing his acquaintanceship with Rowan was tense, at best. The two men never clicked. They had only met once last semester when Aelin and Chaol had to work late for an inorganic chemistry lab, and whatever vibes they gave each other were not pleasant. Ever since, she tried to avoid the two of them ever crossing paths again, though Rowan frequently expressed his displeasure whenever she brought up their work in the lab.

“Wow. How are you really feeling then? You’ve been having morning sickness, I take it?” Aelin tried not to show how shocked she was by the genuine concern and automatic acceptance in his voice. Why couldn’t this have been Rowan’s reaction?

Nonetheless, she nodded. “It actually hit me for the first time when we originally planned our coffee date. I went straight to Lysandra’s house to take a test and had it confirmed at the doctor at the end of the week. I think I’m still processing it all, actually.” 

“That’s understandable, Aelin, this is huge. And Rowan, does he know? He’s studying abroad in Wendlyn this semester, right?”

Aelin let out a humorless laugh. “Oh yeah. He knows. Not that he cares.”

Chaol narrowed his eyes, likely figuring out how their conversation had gone, but he didn’t pry for more details. Aelin was grateful for that. Grateful for him. “Well, I’m not going anywhere, Aelin. I get it if you’re not looking to date anyone while you figure this out with Rowan, but I still want to be around you.” He reached across the table and took her hand in his. “I like you a lot, I have for a while now, in all honesty, but a friendship with you is better than nothing.”

Aelin stared at their joined hands, tears welling in her eyes. “Thank you, Chaol. Your support means more than you know.”

He leaned across the table to kiss her on the cheek, and Aelin couldn’t stop her blush this time. They steered the conversation to other topics, talking endlessly about everything they could think of.

Though Aelin was sad at the thought of what could have been, she felt hope reignite in her chest.

---

Thanks for reading! If you’d like to be added to/taken off my general SJM tag list just send me an ask! i’m very good at losing them in the comments. love y’all!

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#aelin galathynius #rowan whitethorn #rowaelin #fanfiction #throne of glass #sarah j maas #sfq meg writes #what we could be

[hopevalley]

Season 8, Episode 10: Old Love, New Love, Is This True Love

All right, so...like I said, work has picked up and my eyes feel like old marbles from staring at numbers (the woes of working in accounting I guess) so I want to get this written up and tossed into the nether before I lose steam and motivation to do it. The interesting thing about these little write-ups is that as the week goes on they just get harder and harder to write...

I do apologize in advance to those who like the long-winded write-ups. I’m just not up to it at the moment. Still feeling kind of bleh from the episode.

Let’s go back to an old format, shall we?

The Good

We might as well start out with the things about this episode that I enjoyed! 

Gossip Hour with the Men was one of the best openers they’ve had on the show in a while. It was genuinely funny without being meanspirited. Nobody looked like the bad guy. Everyone just calmly talked about it alike it was a normal thing to maybe call off the wedding. Bill calling out Carson for giving marriage advice was pretty funny, Mike was a delight. I don’t know what to say. I’d watch a whole episode of The Boys just hanging around spending time together.

--

Florence’s worry that she’s ugly was...not a terrible idea for a storyline, but the actress is too good-looking to pretend to be ugly (I saw her in this pretty yellow dress on Instagram a couple years ago and she was smashing)? Also, it’s not like Ned is a handsomely aged gentleman (like Henry lol) so it makes even less sense for the characters. I think they should have gone with Florence feeling she’s “plain” and that dressing up Super Nice makes her feel uncomfortable because she just doesn’t feel like Herself and worries maybe it’s projecting a false sense of Who She Is or something? I guess overall I still liked that an attempt was made to add some depth to Florence and her difficulties in choosing a dress/hairstyle, so...it goes here.

--

Ned asking Henry to be his best man was nice, too. I can forgive the shoddy pacing and weird placement of this request (like I do with almost everything in the show) but only because the scene was just...so incredibly wholesome. 

I like how Henry just casually is like, “Well maybe today’s just not the day.” I think it eased Ned’s mind just a little that he CAN back out if he really wants to.

I think it’s worth thinking about the fact that Ned and Henry would have always worked very closely, since the mercantile would have been a company store before the mine closed down... I like Henry and Ned as pals.

--

I’m glad the “investment” thing with Jesse and Clara’s savings was brought up in a way that...makes sense. And also, glad it wasn’t forgotten.

--

I really liked Molly and Florence in this episode. I’m a little sad Florence married Ned because I AM SORRY BUT I WANTED TO KEEP SHIPPING MOLLY AND FLORENCE TOGETHER UGHGHGHH

But their relationship is so good and maYBE Elizabeth will learn something from them.

Hey Elizabeth...you see that?

YOU SEE THAT?

Just saying.

And then later...

“You are the sister I never had, the mother I forever wanted, the friend I have always needed. From the depths of those dark and terrifying coal mines you’ve walked beside me, picking me up whenever I’ve stumbled along the way.”

AAAAAAAAA IT GOT ME.

--

I’m...really liking Fiona and Mike’s relationship, whatever it is. I kind of think they’re not headed toward anything romantic. Everyone thinks Mike is really into Fiona but at the end of the episode we realize he likes talking to her about business; it’s almost like they have this shared passion for numbers/ideas and he likes infodumping to her (and vice-versa).

I think they’re going to end up being “just friends” and Fiona will end up paired off with the man Elizabeth doesn’t choose. They hinted at Nathan briefly in this episode (with Allie’s hair), but who knows? I’m over trying to speculate on where the triangle is going at this point, but I actually like Fiona’s relationship with Mike so much that I’ll be disappointed if she fades into the background with Nathan or Lucas. Mike deserves more screentime. 

--

Ned and Florence sharing their fIRST KISS. My husband got emotional over this. And I admit, it was starting to get to me, too. I can’t NOT root for them. 

--

I said it before and I’ll say it again: I WOULD DIE FOR THE CANFIELDS.

--

The wedding was nice. I liked that Bill and Joseph officiated it together; it gives Joseph a li’l trial run of pastoring and finally Bill gets to use some of that power of his to officiate a wedding.

“Please, if you’d like” is such a Bill way to say that they may kiss LOL.

--

Also, I have to admit that I did enjoy Lucas calling Nathan out about Allie. She wouldn’t be caught in the middle if he’d leave Elizabeth alone AND HE IS RIGHT LMAO.

The last good thing: Elizabeth telling Nathan she doesn’t blame him for Jack’s death. Nice. Good. Thank you. He probably needed to hear that.

--

...THE BAD

Carson and Faith. UGH. UGHHHHHHHHHH. BREAK UP ALREADY I HATE YOU BOTH.

I appreciated that Carson had the ring ages ago, and I did like his conversation with Minnie—or more accurately, her advice to him. I felt like she was nudging him toward, “Remember why you became a surgeon in the first place.” If he became a surgeon to help people, then there’s no reason he can’t help people where he is. Sure, he might not be doing state of the art procedures but with Faith working alongside him, he can afford time to learn new things and go to doctor conventions or even take a specialized class now and then. No other doctor could get away for very long but he has that chance!

And he’ll arguably be doing more good in the middle of nowhere than in the city. All the doctors want to live in the city. Nobody wants to barely get paid for their time in the countryside.

We had a whole episode that made it clear that Faith and Carson don’t make a lot of money and do a lot of charity work. They also work for trade goods (mostly food). So it’s like...a pretty big difference in lifestyle? 

Half the reason I can’t get invested in these characters is because I really can’t stand Paul Greene. He just...annoys me on every single level imaginable. But he’s a decent actor and I can’t help but feel that his character was a massive waste of space for the past few seasons through no fault of the man himself. Imagine introducing a character like Carson and then leaving him to rot before you try to make him interesting with a romance plot that nobody asked for.

Yes, some people really like Faith and Carson, but as a whole I think the fandom didn’t buy into them as a ship due to the lack of chemistry.

It really is a shame. This episode didn’t do a thing to endear me to either character. Please, Carson. I am begging you to leave town.

--

This one particular line of dialogue almost enraged me.

WE KNOW WE KNOW WE KNOW WE KNOW WE CAN SEE THAT FOR OURSELVES. WHY DID THEY HAVE ROSEMARY SAY THIS LIKE IT’S AN EPISODE OF A CHILD’S TV SHOW?

--

Elizabeth.........

How could Katie have...looked up to her? She was never in her class? That was? Never part of anything? It was just something they threw in here to force Elizabeth to make 1% more sense in the role she’s in but IT STILL DOESN’T WORK.

I felt like I was back in Season 5 again with Lori and Elizabeth putting their nose in everyone’s business except it’s just Elizabeth!! The whole plot, which was boring and contrived anyway, should have gone to Molly, since she’s Florence’s best friend and another woman from town that Katie would have known as a child.

AND ALSO, MOLLY WOULD HAVE KNOWN KATIE’S MOTHER AND WOULD REMEMBER THE GRIEF THAT NED STRUGGLED WITH.

I know they wanted to make Elizabeth give advice so that she’d Realize that she needs to, I don’t know, make better choices or something, but it was too on the nose for me and I hated it.

GinithePooh on Reddit made a good comparison to Elizabeth in this episode by saying she reminded them of Clippy from Microsoft Word, always popping up and offering to help when nobody really needs or wants advice.

To honor their incredible idea, I opened Photoshop and created this gem, which I will also be posting separately so that people can reblog it if they wish to.

I also don’t think I need to say also filed under The Bad is the fact that Elizabeth didn’t even apologize for being awful to Rosemary and then gave her unsolicited advice to other people for two days straight. I can’t believe they wrote that? 

All I can say is that her apology to Rosemary, when it comes, better be good.

--

And I didn’t like this either:

I wish it had been followed up by literally anything: Nathan saying he’s sorry he didn’t tell her sooner or something to make the hand-holding actually be a little more innocent.

As it is, it just seems so deliberate? 

Maybe the next episode starts off right in this scene and we’ll get that? If so, this might actually end up being fine. I just don’t think it is if it doesn’t get a little more direct attention.

--

& THE UGLY

I debated on putting anything in here, because I’m not ready to talk about my feelings on this matter, at least not fully. But I’ve been pretty quiet all season so far, and...eh, why not just mention things in advance? What will it hurt?

Let me preface this section by saying I’m biased and I doubt hardly anyone on this site will agree with me, so feel free to just ignore this part if that’s the case.

There are two things that I really didn’t like in this episode.

I hate the slanting toward Bill/Molly.

I like Molly just fine but I don’t like her with Bill. I’m biased as all getout and also worried about the future/potential Season 9 with regards to this. I don’t want to see it. Like at all. Why, you ask? You should know why if you follow me. I’m super transparent.

It’s because I like AJ AND I WANT HER BACK LOL.

John Tinker rewatched the series so we know he wouldn’t have missed that hanging plot thread—especially since he didn’t forget any of the other things that were brought up this season! So why didn’t she appear this season? The love triangle absolutely needed to be a focus or it would have never ended, so that’s part of it, but I’m also pretty sure Josie Bissett wasn’t interested in doing any filming last year during Covid. My only “proof” is that Wedding March 6 wasn’t filmed last year even though it was scheduled to be filmed, but it makes sense. Last year was chaos.

THAT SAID, Jack Wagner posted on his Instagram the other day that they are actually filming Wedding March 6 now, so... I guess AJ’s re-appearance in Season 9 wouldn’t come as too much of a surprise if they wanted to write it.

You’d think I’d be hyped about that, and I kind of am? But it doesn’t come without its share of worries, too. We just had the worst love triangle in the history of love triangles and I really don’t want another one, especially if it makes any of the characters in question look stupid or mean.

I fully admit a well-written love triangle could be a LOT of fun for them* (low stakes because they’re not front and center characters), but I saw how Nathan was written so far this season and I really, REALLY do not want to see that happen to Molly, Bill, or AJ.

Anyway, not a fan of the Molly/Bill stuff. No chemistry. I don’t want it.

*I would totally write a fanfic like this lmao.

--

And finally...the part that everyone will hate me for:

I DO NOT WANT TO SEE ABIGAIL COME BACK. And I specifically do not want her to come back ‘cause I do not wanna see Henry/Abigail happen.

I fully recognize that a lot of you like it and ship the heck out of it, and that’s...good. I’m glad you enjoy it. I loathe it, though, and I worry that all these hints (more like...mentions) are leaning toward...something. Like, either they’re:

1) Sending Abigail off/tying up that loose end with Henry (since nothing was ever clarified either way), or

2) Warming up the audience to receive Abigail back on the show.

I’m pretty into the idea of one-sided Henry/Abigail. Hindsight is 20/20, regrets, that’s all some juicy stuff to give a character like Henry. Some things can’t ever be made right again. He had too direct of a connection to the death of her husband and son for me to ever want to see them together. Forgiveness? Yes. A careful but meaningful friendship? Yes. Romantic relationship? Uh...no thanks.

I liked the Abigail mentions at first because I felt like...the character still mattered (as she should) but I’m at a point where I feel like they’re trying really hard to steer the fandom’s view a certain way and not knowing where it’s going is extremely unsettling to me.

--

I’ll probably talk more about the things that bother me when the season ends, because I’m hoping to have a better idea of where things are going to be headed, but for now just...know that I feel very apprehensive.

And keep in mind that I primarily watch this show for Bill these days, since all my previous faves (AJ, Frank, the old Abigail, Dottie) have exited, stage left. I also always really liked seeing Henry. So as you can imagine, seeing plotlines I hate for the only two characters I’m invested in? Is making me consider dropping the series next year.

My husband told me I should hate-watch it, but I don’t know if my heart can take it. I’ve been following this series for so long...it just...kind of hurts to feel let down like this? 

But sometimes an ongoing series ends up going where you...didn’t want it to, and it becomes something that’s no longer right for you. I hope that doesn’t happen, but last night’s episode makes me feel like...it might be happening for real this time.

I guess if that holds true it’ll be back to fanfiction for me. Will that novelization I planned ages ago end up getting written? Will I write the best love triangle fanfic known to man? WHO KNOWS.

For now, we’ll all have to wait and see! Two more episodes left. I’m really curious to see how they resolve some of the open plots right now. :>

#when calls the heart #long post #character studies and information #analysis and meta discussion