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rein-ette · 3 years

Note

Are you still working on your Commonwealth study? Do you have any thoughts on Arthur's relationships with his colonies apart from Canzuk + US?

Not properly, unfortunately with exams and then work I haven’t had mental/emotional capacity to do real research (and probably won’t for a while 😔). But I have continued to think about and develop certain relationships, and I think I also have old hcs I’ve never shared, so I’ll put those down!

Born into the Empire

Australia

@oumaheroes has already done such great hcs on him idk what I can add, but basically he was a little bit of a rowdy child, always breaking windows and shattering fancy pots, never able to sit still. I think rainbow once mentioned that Ken (short for Kenneth, my name for Aus) was a lot like England as a child in his curiosity and energy, and I wholeheartedly agree. But I think Arthur’s intensity was more inwardly directed, pushing him to pursue and master new talents and learn whatever he could, while Australia is a little more carefree in his love for the outdoors, exploring, jumping around and off things, little wild animals. Unfortunately for him, he was born in a period of the empire when Arthur was very serious about his kids education, and therefore often praised those who studied hard and learned fast, which really just wasn’t Australia’s cup of tea. Australia took this kinda hard and thought he was the “dumb” one in the family that Arthur was always scolding, but in reality Arthur knew and appreciated that Australias interests lay elsewhere — he was just a frustrated, tired, parent who really wanted to give his kids the best while also holding his empire together, two goals that were never going to fit well in the end and would completely exhaust him.

As Australia’s grown older he’s realized a bit of this (not entirely, though) and also that 1) he really did break a lot expensive things and cause general mayhem 2) scolding us Arthur’s way of showing he cares, if he didn’t he wouldn’t have payed attention to him at all 3) despite being a penal colony, he was still one of Arthur’s more “legitimate” children (being white and a boy) and was therefore still incredibly privileged — never having to question, for example, why it was that Arthur was his dad, if it should be this way, or if he had a seat at the family table at all (more on this later).

New Zealand

Zee, from birth, was a clear favourite. Obedient, calm, quietly intelligent, he would also later develop a blistering sense of humour which combined with his appearance made it overwhelmingly clear who’s child he was. If Ken questioned his place in the family because of his poor academic record and others did because of their appearance/race/other complications, Kaelan never had such problems; his siblings called him the “prince.” Zee, however, also had a charm that, like Matthew, endeared him to his siblings and mostly protected him from jealousy, though he certainly still had issues with being called a try hard, daddy’s boy, bossy, arrogant. Certainly as a child Zee was a little prideful and, under that unperturbed demeanour, willful, but he grew out of it by the 20th century and became one of those most trusted by Arthur, second only to Matthew. He’s also always been inseparable from his brother Australia despite their differences, and today they both have one of the healthiest and most amicable relationships with Arthur of any nation, let alone former colonies (family road trips, every summer).

Bermuda

I absolute fell in love with this girl after reading about here, once, in this fic by @shachaai, and after that my mind just ran away with me. For me, her human name given to her by Arthur just has to be Ariel — for the little mermaid reference, yes, symbolizing her connection to the sea and stunning good looks, but also because:

1. Ariel is a biblical name, meaning lion of God. This makes sense to me, because Bermuda began as a Portuguese trade post, so Arthur definitely consulted our resident bad catholic Port before naming her.

2. Ariel used to be boys name. This also makes sense, because I hc Bermuda was and still is a tomboy. Bitch is fierce, takes no prisoners, and has zero filter. Her letters to Arthur, which all the colonies sent so Arthur could keep an eye on things, were full of shit like “I swear to god if the Spanish don’t get out of my waters I might eat one of them,” and “father, I asked you for destroyers two months ago, and yet you sent them to Hong Kong — could you explain this most unusual occurrence, surely it’s not that you forgot”, and “thank you for the harpoon on my birthday, I caught a small shark a couple days ago and have sent you some of its teeth for your collection.” Arthur tolerates this attitude because he’s weak when it comes to girls; he absolutely spoils his daughters (and flushes like a 16 year old when a woman so much as bats her eyelashes at him). Yes, p*ssywhipped Arthur is a hill I will die on.

3. It also suits her because? Ariel? Shakespeare? The Tempest? Bermuda Triangle? Shipwrecks? Daughter-like figure of powerful and vengeful sorcerer? Yeah. And this girl is a fire spirit — she is so lively, snarky, clever. As she’s grown older she’s mellowed out a little, but still: a no shit taken, no fucks given type of gal.

4. Speaking of growing up, she’s also become quite the beauty. Shacha, if I’m remembering correctly, described her as dark skinned, wavy-haired, and green eyed and that image has been burned onto the back of my eyelids ever since. Those Iberian genetics really be pulling through for her, that’s for sure. Engport love child if I’ve ever seen one. Definitely one of the prettiest in her family.

Singapore

I’ve already mentioned this to needcake, but I’m not too big a fan of canon Singapore, so this is my oc version. Singapore is fascinating to me because it had only a very small local population before it became a colony (The original settlement had actually been destroyed by the Portuguese about two centuries before the British started building a port there.) So nation-tans like Singapore and Bermuda really are Arthur’s children in the most direct sense of the word. And yet, Singapore is mostly ethnically Chinese, with Malays being the second largest group. Growing up Asian in a white, Victorian era family surely cannot have been easy and more than once Singapore probably wondered if there hadn’t been some mistake. To make up for the constant fear that he wasn’t “really” British, Singapore studied ferociously and had a truly terrifying work ethic. I’m not sure if this is common knowledge outside Asian circles, so I’ll mention that this hc comes from the fact Singapore is well known for having truly exceptional students and some of the most prestigious schools. Singaporeans score highly in literally everything and they have an advantage with good English learning environments, a highly desirable trait in Asia, but these results come from brutally long hours — and its really saying something that they’re known for working hard, considering the studying ethic of students in Korea, Japan, and China aint nothing to sneeze at, either. To me this actually fits really well with Singapore’s upbringing in Arthur’s household, because Arthur himself prizes intelligence and hard work above all else, being a workaholic himself.

As for their relationship, it was probably the best when Singapore was young and peaked in the 1930s with the massive naval base the British built at Singapore, at the time the largest dry dock in the world. Singapore was a well-behaved child, not necessarily introverted but not rowdy either, and all the way into his teenage years he truly admired Arthur and was proud to be a part of the British Empire, despite his lingering unease and insecurities. The British defeat in World War II, however, was a massive turning point. He had worked his ass off to be a good son, a good brother, to contribute to the only family and system he had ever known, and he had thought by the 30s he was finally on his way to becoming a fine adult. And suddenly, the British surrender brings his entire world crashing down. He had followed the rules faithfully thinking it was his destiny, but suddenly it was clear that all rules were made up. Of course, his insecurities exploded. If the empire was a ruse, what the hell was he? A part of the illusion? He couldn’t have a truly Asian identity, because many of the old East Asian nations shunned him for his Western upbringing, and he could not entirely understand their values either. So he was a kid who kinda had to figure out late and very very suddenly who the fuck he was and wanted to be.

And, well, he’s done pretty well for himself, hasn’t he. After having a total crisis and questioning everything, I think Singapore slowly started to realize that just because the British Empire as a political entity didn’t last forever, that didn’t mean that his entire childhood and identity weren’t real. The love he gave to his siblings and the love he got back, the hard work he put in, his bond with Arthur and the safe, happy childhood he had — those memories and feelings didnt have to be diminished by what came after. Essentially, he learned the lesson all nations have to learn, which is that one needs to be able to discern between duties as a nation and feelings as a human being, and to some extent keep them separate to protect both.

Whoooooo ok I’ll stop there because this turned into a dissertation, sorry. Let me know if there are any specifics u want me to elaborate on or anything I missed, but I’ll leave this here for today :)

#hws england #hws Australia #hws new zealand #oc: hws Bermuda #not gonna tag anymore I’m lazy #fun times with the commonwealth #I probably won’t write so much for all of them I just put it there to remind myself #needcake #ask #my hcs

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nancydfan · 3 years

Note

I think that Mia gets too bad of a rap from a lot of people.

Like yes, was she an agent of a super shady organization responsible for making a bio weapon that destroyed a great deal of lives? Yes. However we don’t know her motivation for joining them yet.

They could have lied honestly. Like The Connections could have advertised themselves to be a great, loving work environment and maybe Mia was young and naive and joined them. Or maybe she was desperate for money, and it was the only job that would hire her. Or hell, maybe she fully knew what they were and joined anyway, either on account of her morals being twisted back then or thinking that even though the company was evil maybe she could do good. Who knows, honestly.

Either way, with The Connections being a shady organization there’s like a very high chance that you don’t get to walk away from them alive. I’m sure if you quit they’d see you as a liability and take you out with no mercy. And that’s why I think Mia didn’t leave, because she knew she would be killed if she did, and maybe that’s why she took the job with Eveline, because it was more of a “you will do this or else” than an option for her (whether it was implied by her boss or if they were upfront about what bad things would happen if she didn’t take the job).

And maybe if her morals were twisted before I fully think meeting and falling in love with Ethan changed her if that was the case, because the Mia we see in RE7 and RE8 is a good person. We see that in how when the Baker’s rescue her she thanks them but tries to leave immediately and tries to warn them about staying away from Eveline (as shown in the note she left in the dlc “Daughters”). She could have tried to get them to call the hospital or her company but she didn’t, because she knew that she was under Eveline’s control and the longer she stayed there the more danger the family was. If she was a shitty person she wouldn’t have done this, she would have done everything she could to save herself.

We also see that in how she leaves a final video note for Ethan, telling him to stay away no matter what, because she didn’t want him to get dragged down in her mess. She knows how much Ethan loves her and I’m sure she knows if she sent a video saying “Ethan pls help” he’d come running for her, but she didn’t because she loves him and wants him to live even if she can’t be there with him. We see it AGAIN when she saves Ethan from Eveline’s grasp, when she tears him from the mold thing he was in and pushes him out so Eveline couldn’t hurt him. Fully knowing she’d have to face Eveline’s wrath.

And for everyone saying “why didn’t she just tell him then” I mean think about it. I think if this super shady organization found out someone they didn’t hire knew what was going on they’d kill them because again they’d be a liability and a threat. And that’s why she doesn’t tell Ethan because she doesn’t want him to be targeted and killed by them. I think if she had the opportunity she would have left The Connections but knows that it would result in her death anyway, and telling Ethan the truth would just end in his death if they found out and it was too risky in her mind.

And I think it’s this same form of protection that prevents her from telling Ethan he’s infected. She says (or at least we can assume that this was her) in Donna’s section that she didn’t tell him because she was afraid she’d lose him. I don’t think he’d divorce her if he found out he was molded (that doesn’t really make sense for his character), I think she was genuinely afraid he’d die (again) or worse begin to transform into a monster the way the rest of the infected did. And that’s why she keeps it hidden because she was scared to death he’d die or suffer a worse fate. Am I saying she was right in hiding it? No, but I think that everyone saying she’s manipulative and gaslighting are wrong because she truly loves Ethan and Rose, and I know she’d give her life gladly if it meant they could live.

I saw other people get mad because Rose is essentially being used as a bio weapon and how could Mia let this happen and I’m like?? She probably doesn’t have a say?? I mean yes Blue Umbrella is supposed to be “the good guys” now but like they’re still a huge organization, I’m sure Mia did her best to prevent this from happening and keep Rose safe but like at the end of the day what can she really do against a huge company?? If anything get mad at Chris because I’m sure he’s got some clout or something in that company that could have allowed Rose to live a normal life without Umbrella or maybe not being used as a weapon but idk 🤷🏻‍♀️ a lot of people were like “Mia’s sO annoying at the beginning of the game” but fam that wasn’t even her?? That’s Miranda?? Besides even if it was Mia that blew up on Ethan in the hospital (as per Ethan’s diary) 1.) people deal with trauma differently, and I’m not saying it’s healthy but she’s scarred and doing her best and 2.) probably was afraid if they talked too much about Louisiana Ethan would realize he was infected and then BAM he’s either dead or a mutated monster. And in the cutscene of Mia saying “you matter!” Can you imagine the stress of knowing your husband is Mr Mold Man and not being able to do anything about it, out of fear of what could happen to him? Like of course she’s upset and going to blow when provoked (not that Ethan was aggressive or anything just that he was prying into a very high pressure soda that is Mia’s emotions lol) because she’s been bottling this up and has no one to talk to, and after a while anyone would explode. I think she would have told him if he hadn’t answered that call. Also marriage is not rainbows and butterflies, sometimes you get into messy fights with your partner and sometimes you or the other person say things you don’t mean but at the end of the day you love each other and try to be better. If anything Capcom was depicting a normal marriage tbh.

At the end of the day Mia is not the bad guy. She is only human who tried her best to keep her family safe against all the odds and idc what anyone says, Ethan and Mia love each other and have a healthy relationship and that’s that.

I hope I do this ask justice cause this is the kinda ask I’ve been like hoping for cause you are absolutely gosh damn right.

I’m a chill person & I’m never gonna probably get up into someone’s face about anything cause it’s fandom. I’m not here to cater your experience. That being said, when I see some of these frankly bad takes on Mia I’m like

We know Jack shit about why Mia joined the Connections. Literally nothing so people who have a whole solidified nasty opinion of Mia should probably just sit down. You don’t have to like her. But you also could like, idk, be absolutely dead wrong cause lol Capcom went, yeah we’re not gonna explain any of that.

I got the impression that in between re7 and re8 that they are hiding from the connections too but I may have misunderstood that In re8. I think it makes sense it’s the type of organization you do not leave. No matter how badly you want to and once Ethan came along, do people really think she’d risk him? Spoiler alert: no, no she wouldn’t.

Also, re7 started w Alan. He’s the one that let eveline get out of control so...I feel like people forget that.

I’ve been talking to a friend about people using the Miranda Mia against the real Mia and I don’t know how to kindly tell people that the game kinda absolutely explained that’s not Mia? I do think Mias got a temper which makes sense because Ethan is so even tempered that he can balance her out better. But Miranda Mia was a fuckin bitch. She was needling Ethan’s pain and mocking him. Do people think Ethan sat around for three years taking that? Ethan’s a big boy. He can take care of himself. He was even fighting back w Miranda Mia so manipulative and abusive takes belong in the toilet w the rest of the shit.

Mia blowing up at Ethan means nothing. My parents have proven to me marriage is not easy. You will lose it on people when emotions run high. It happens. There’s a world of difference between a moment of anger versus abuse. But you still love and forgive people for moments of anger because we all have them. And I’m sure Ethan can be just as much as a pain in the ass. I love him more than most and I’d be the first person to admit I’m sure he didn’t make it easy all the time either.

Mia held the truth from Ethan because she was scared not just for her but for him too. It’s a selfless kind of lie. We all do them so I don’t know why Mia is getting burned at the stake for it. I’m just not movable on this. That was a heavy thing to carry and she was doing her best.

As for Rose, I don’t even know what Capcom is doing. How can anyone else know? She’s special and powerful. Maybe she wanted that life? I think we can reserve judgement until re9.

Like I said above, no one has to like Mia. Maybe you don’t vibe w her or maybe you still just don’t care for her. That’s cool. But my gosh don’t lie about the kind of person she is. If you can’t acknowledge her world and heart belongs to Ethan and Rose, I’m just not sure what to tell you.

Sorry for ranting on your ask nonnie 😆 I really appreciate that you sent this in! It needed said imo

#thanks for the ask nonnie!!#resident evil #ethan winters #mia winters #mithan #resident evil spoilers #resident evil 7 #resident evil 8 #mrs joe speaks #long post

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thorne93 · 4 years

Text

Unforeseen Chasm (Part 6)

Prompt: Two sisters fall for men that are absolute enemies. The love they have could tear all of them apart, or it could bring them together.

Word Count: 1413

Warnings: Language, arguing/fighting

Note: This is by far the longest thing I’ve ever written (including my novels). It’s a collaboration with the amazing @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo. It started as a funny “What if…?” and it evolved and got huge. This took two years to write. We are both proud and happy and we hope you enjoy it. It follows from Thor 1 to Endgame in the MCU. Some of the timelines may be off in order to fit certain people, and some characters may show up earlier or in different ways than they have in the movie. But for the most part, it follows the MCU. It also has a bit of crossover with some other Marvel characters throughout the story.

Masterlist for Unforeseen Chasm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you landed, you were inside a large round open room. This must be the Bifrost.

Thor ordered the warriors to get themselves to a healing room, and you followed him, trying frantically to keep up.

“What’s going on?” you asked, nearly tripping over your own feet just to keep with his pace.

“I’m not sure, but my brother lying about our father’s death can not be good.”

“Why would he do that?”

“To keep me in exile, I’m sure.”

“But why does he want that?”

“I do not know.”

The rainbow bridge was long, and with Thor’s pace, you were panting by the time you reached the palace, following the prince. You tried desperately to take it all in, but it was all so much. There was so much gold, so much life everywhere. The scenery was truly stunning, for what you could tell.

You stayed close to Thor as if getting more than a few feet from him would cause you to combust. Guards eyed you with uncertainty. Thor made it to his father’s chambers, where his mother stood, hugging the raven haired Loki, and a sleeping Odin lay.

“Thor! I knew you’d return to us!” she said thankfully before pulling her son into an embrace.

“Why don’t you tell her?” Thor asked. “How you sent the Destroyer to kill our friends, to kill me!”

“What?” Frigga asked, standing next to you, acknowledging your presence briefly and politely with a quick look.

“Well, I must have been enforcing father’s last command,” he said with venom.

“You’re a talented liar, brother, always have been,” Thor remarked.

“It’s good to have you back. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to destroy Jotunheim.”

In an instant, he blasted Thor back with his giant scepter, about to leave the King’s chambers when he laid eyes on you again and nearly stopped in his tracks before whisking himself away and down the hall.

This left you and Frigga alone.

“Oh, dear,” she said shaking her head.

“Is… is he alright?” you asked, looking down the hall Loki just left.

“I’m afraid not,” she informed.

“What happened?” you inquired. You shook your head. “I’m so sorry, I’m Y/N. I knew your son, on Earth? I met Thor, and Loki, down there. Thor brought me back because… well… he said I might be Asgardian.”

“Is that so?” she mused. “I’m Queen Frigga, it is a pleasure to meet you. Oh I do hope they quit fighting.”

“What has them so… at odds?” you asked as Frigga started to fret and scurry out of the bed chambers.

“My son...he found out he was adopted and I’m afraid he hasn’t taken the news as well as we had hoped…” she confessed.

“Adopted? Loki?” you inquired. That was never in any of the books.

“Yes, but he is our son all the same. I think the announcement of Thor’s coronation sent him over the edge…” She looked at you and noticed your troubled features. “Oh but you mustn’t let that deter you from him. He’s a good person he’s just…”

“No, no...I think I get it. I’m sorry, your Majesty but I may know a way to stop this fight,” you offered. At Frigga’s words, something stirred inside you. You had felt a connection to Thor, but now… now you owed it to Loki to help him. He didn’t have to go through this alone. No wonder he was out of his mind. He was over one thousand years old and he just now learned of his true parentage. To not be wanted, not truly, by your adoptive family.

Frigga frowned at you at first but then nodded, permitting you to leave. With that, you took off into a sprint, hoping to find them. From what you could remember of the lore, the Bifrost had the ability to destroy other realms, perhaps that's where Loki went.

Nearly out of breath, feeling as if your lungs would explode, you ran down the rainbow bridge once more, to find that it was in fact being activated as a weapon of mass destruction, and the two princes were inside, shouting at each other.

“I never wanted the throne! I only ever wanted to be your equal!”

“I will not fight you, brother!”

“I’m not your brother, I never was!”

“Loki, this is madness!” Thor proclaimed.

“Is it madness? Is it? Is it?” he challenged, a sort of desperation in his tone. You approached slowly to the Bifrost, not wanting to startle either God.

When you entered, Loki’s mad eyes darted to you. They seemed erratic, crazed, but still as beautiful as ever.

“Your Majesty? Uh, King Loki?” you tried, entirely unsure how to address a mad King in a foreign land, that days ago was pretty much make-believe to you. “I know what you’re going through.”

“The human,” he mused, his head cocking to the side. “You brought back a souvenir?” Loki questioned, aiming it at Thor.

“She is not of Midgard, and you know it. You saw her with your own eyes and she saw you,” Thor insisted with a desperate plea, pointing to you with Mjolnir.

“So why bring her here?”

“To find answers,” you interjected, stepping even closer to him, to this mad, insane, hurting man. “As I’m sure that’s all you want to do too? Your mother told me, about the adoption? I’m adopted too, sort of. I never knew my real birth parents.”

“You and I are nothing alike,” Loki vowed, coldness in his words.

But you kept slowly closing the gap.

“I think we are. You’re a child out of place, lost, only wanting to prove yourself. You dwell in a shadow that no one else sees. You felt as if you didn’t belong for a long time, but without explanation. Yet when you got the explanation, it wasn’t what you wanted to hear,” you continued, merely reciting your own feelings. “I’m the same. I never felt I belonged to my family. In fact, I never felt I truly belonged anywhere… until Thor and you came to Earth. Then--Then I felt home. I felt strength, and wonder, and warmth.”

“What does any of that have to do with me?” he demanded, looking down at you.

“Because I can help you. Or at least try. Together, we can find answers. We can look into our pasts together,” you tried, holding out your hand. “All you have to do... is stop all of this. I know you want your father’s approval, I know you want to be seen as Thor’s equal… but killing this race, killing in the name of your country is not the way. We can find a better way together, if you only let me.”

You had no explanation, no reason to want to help this total stranger. Help Thor? Sure, he was kind enough to bring you back to a place that may have the truth about your parentage. But to get involved with this family-political war should’ve been beyond you. You were a mere physicist from Earth, what did you have to offer to this hurting god?

The truth was -- a lot.

“I can tell all you want is an ally, to be seen, to be heard,” you stated, hoping your words would sink in. “I can do that. I see you, I can listen. But your father will never accept something like this. He cast your brother out for the same act, don’t follow in his naive footsteps, learn from his mistakes…”

His eyes fell to the floor, darting from left to right in thought. He slowly walked over to the center of the Bifrost, the staff powering the surge protruding from the middle of the key.

Without looking back at you or Thor, he quietly said, “I’m not doing this because of you..” and removed the staff, effectively shutting down the Bifrost. “I want to know where I came from. I won’t kill the people of Jotunheim… At least not today.”

Not another word came from him as he swept between you and Thor and made his way back to the palace. You apologized to Thor for your speech, if you offended him in any way. He assured you that whatever got Loki to come to his senses was worth it.

The two of you returned to the palace, where Odin had woken peacefully, and now rightfully back as king. And all seemed to settle into back into place…

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Tag List:

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Loki:

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#unforeseen chasm #loki x reader #tony stark x ofc #loki fic #loki #tony stark #tony stark fic #thor #thor fic

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camillemontespan · 5 years

Text

she wolves [part five: he is mine]

@jovialyouthmusic @sirbeepsalot @fromthedeskofpaisleybleakmore @moonlightgem7 @burnsoslow @ibldw-main @emichelle @katedrakeohd @of-course-i-went-to-hartfeld @mskaneko @nazariortega @dcbbw @gardeningourmet @iplaydrake @notoriouscs @star-spangled-eyes @rainbowsinthestorm @stopforamoment @pedudley @drakesensworld @pug-bitch

Warnings: CHARACTER DEATH. Okay, this is when She Wolves turns into a massive shit storm. I spoke to @sirbeepsalot before this as this chapter reflects one of her chapters and just to clarify, she is 100% OKAY with me posting this because we all get similar ideas. Maybe we should all work for PB?

This is a long chapter, sorry!

Madeleine

My Manor is now empty with everyone having left to return to their duchies. Leo has also left. I dread to think he has gone to Lythikos with that psychopath orphan but I have a feeling that he has.

He couldn't keep his eyes off her at the press conference yesterday. It was humiliating! Why can't he just see that she is nothing compared to me? She will never have with him what we had.

He was my first kiss.

He was my first date.

He was the first man I had sex with.

He was my first love.

So why is he with her?

I know people change but the beauty about Leo and I is that we continue on. We still love each other. We still circle around the other, like the sun and earth, forever connected.

How can what we have shared amount to nothing in the end?

I'm hibernating in bed but even that doesn't come naturally to me. I hate laziness. I have been taught from a young age - not by my mother - that if you want something done, you are better off just doing it yourself.

I can only rely on myself to fix this situation with Leo. And I will fix it, one way or another.

********************************************

Kiara

I am sat in front of the TV with my notebook in my lap, pen poised, ready to take notes.

I'm conducting research. On the screen in front of me is the news programme Good Morning Cordonia and I'm keen to find out what the newsreaders thought of the press conference.

I doodle stars in the margins of my notebook until I hear my name come up.

'Now, Kiara.. What do we think of her?' the newsreader, Natalia, asks their political correspondent, Sarah.

'Kiara was.. Lacklustre,' Sarah answers. 'She barely said a word and this is concerning given that she is wanting to become Queen. How can we support her when she has nothing to say? Sure, when she was asked questions, she mentioned how her father is a diplomat and she has learned from him. She knows how to talk to important figures and conduct herself well but that's the bare minimum for a queen. She needs to step up.'

Natalia smiles sympathetically. 'Agreed. She seems like a very nice woman but we want someone strong and who isn't afraid to defend our country. Do you think she is outshined by her rivals?'

Sarah nods. 'Absolutely. You have Olivia Nevrakis who is fiery, dominating and has admitted in the past that her favourite hobby is knife throwing. Then you have Camille, who although is American, just took to her role as a Duchess like a duck to water. If Kiara wants to be recognised as a true claimant for the throne, she needs to go for it.'

I turn the TV off. My stomach feels like it's in knots. If course they think that of me. Everyone does.

What people mistake for shyness is actually me observing. I'm a master at reading a room. I know how to approach certain situations talk to certain people and keep the peace. But when I observe, I become quiet because my mind is working overtime to take everything in.

I know Leo is falling in love with Olivia.

I know Olivia is falling in love with Leo, but I doubt she knows that herself.

I know Madeleine hates Olivia with a passion and wants Leo for herself.

I know Hana doesn't actually want to be Queen.

I know Penelope is having a secret affair with her driver.

I know Drake wants a normal life but Camille isn't as forthcoming.

I know Madeleine wears vanilla scented perfume when she wants to seduce (I didn't know that naturally.. She told me when she was drunk).

Well, I will show them. I will prove I have things so say and that I'm not just boring Kiara.

I will invite them to my duchy for a weekend of elegance, music and wine. Lots of wine. I will be social and confident and I will prove them all wrong.

********************************************

Camille

I wait anxiously, my eyes fixed on the little stick that now sits on the edge of the sink. I'm sat on the floor and Drake is sat down with me, his arms wrapped around me, whispering that I shouldn't be nervous.

I really want this.

Not because I'll have an heir but because I finally get to have a family with Drake. Its all I've ever wanted since I was little and now, if this happens, everything will fall into place.

I would love to see Drake as a father. I just know he will be so good at it. He would be protective but not overbearing, he would teach our kids how to do outdoorsy stuff like building a campfire or toasting smores and he would make our family his priority. I know he had a rough childhood as his father passed away and his mother abandoned him, so he has so much love to give. All I want is for him to be happy.

I would hate for this to be a false alarm.

Drake's phone beeps. 'It's time,' he whispers, giving my hand a squeeze. 'You ready?'

I nod mutely and stand up. At the last minute, I panic and cover my eyes. 'God, I can't look, I'm too nervous!'

Drake chuckles and stands up too. Slowly, he picks up the stick and his eyes look down at the result. I look at him with bated breath.

A smile breaks out on his face. 'Are you ready to be a mom?'

My heart skips a beat and I let out a scream of joy. This is happening! This is actually happening!

I'm jumping up and down with tears in my eyes and Drake is laughing and coming towards me to pull me into his arms. He lifts me up so we're the same height and he kisses me over and over as he cries happily.

Drake never cries. Our happy tears mix together. 'I'm so happy,' he murmurs into my hair. 'So fucking happy.'

*********************************************

Olivia

I'm lying in bed watching the news, trying not to smile as Leo kisses his way down my body. He has made it his personal mission to see how many kisses he can cover my skin with and currently, he is on 200.

'Olivia Nevrakis is a difficult one,' the political correspondent says to the newsreader in their segment. 'She has grown up alongside the monarchy all her life and she is powerful. Cordonia needs a strong figurehead. But she often comes across as a little.. dark.'

I smirk and Leo chuckles, pressing a kiss on my stomach.

'I know what you mean,' the newsreader agrees. 'The public don't seem to connect with her. They didn't support King Liam as he used brute force as a way to exert power so I doubt they would be as accepting of Olivia, who admitted in the past that when she was five, she was given a dagger for a birthday present.'

They both sigh. 'She is very loyal to her country,' the political correspondent says, trying to find something positive.

Leo looks up at me. 'Oh I know she is,' he says, giving me a wink. I laugh and watch as he kisses lower, his hands roaming up my arms to keep me in place.

'She seems to lack.. Feelings,' the newsreader says.

I turn the TV off at that. Say what you want about me but don't dismiss me as being a cold blooded cretin like Madeleine. I have feelings.

Leo stops kissing me and looks up at me with concern. 'Liv.. I know that look.'

'I have feelings!' I snap. 'Sorry I don't like to be all lovey dovey all the time. Sorry I don't think everything is sunshine and rainbows, sorry I like practical presents like daggers, sorry -'

He bolts up and presses his hand over my mouth. 'Shh, Liv,' he whispers. 'Who cares what they say? Fuck em. You're Olivia Nevrakis. You don't let them tell you who you are, you tell them.'

I'm ashamed to admit that tears prick my eyes. 'I hate to be compared to him,' I mutter.

Leo closes his eyes. He knows I mean his brother.

'You are not like him,' he grounds out, opening his green eyes so they flash with anger. 'You will never be like him.'

'He raised taxes so he could improve our armies and when people couldn't pay, he threw them out of their homes..' I whisper. 'I would never do that. Am I really so intimidating that people think I would be that heartless?'

Leo presses a kiss on my forehead and holds me close. 'You are not heartless. My brother abused his power and lead Cordonia down a dark road. Yes, he threw people out of their homes. He raised taxes. He imprisoned those who dared to speak against him. He shut down Parliament so only he could be the authorative voice of Cordonia. He gave nobles more and more reward and neglected the commoners to the point where they rose up against each other. He didn't care. He watched his country destroy itself by civil war and instead of fighting for peace, he fuelled it.' He breaks off, his voice cracking.

'So don't you dare believe those who compare you to that monster,' he says. 'You are loyal to this country, you care about your duchy and you hated what he did. You tried to steer him back towards the light. You're remarkable.'

I stare at him, my mouth agape. He has never been this kind to me before. We never talk about feelings or what we think of the other person. I'm not like Madeleine who constantly needs reassurance. We laugh and joke and fuck. Serious conversations never take place in our bed.

My bed.

His bed.

Not our bed.

'You have feelings,' he assures me. We share a heated look and it feels like he can see into my soul. It's like he knows I have feelings for him that are buried deep down.

'Do you have feelings?' I ask quietly.

Leo smiles his lazy smile. 'Yeah, Liv. I have feelings.'

He makes love to me after that. I usually refrain from calling sex that sickening phrase but that is what he does. There's no other way to describe it. He takes his time, his hands roaming my body gently, taking me gently, his lips gentle on my neck. Everything is gentle. Sometimes I forget that sex doesn't have to be adventurous or pushing boundaries. Sometimes, it can just be lazy and kind and lovely.

He is turning me into mush but right now, I don't care. All I want is to keep being reminded that I have feelings and that I'm human. He reminds me of this with each stroke, each kiss, each whisper of my name.

*********************************************

Kiara

The court arrive at my Manor a few days following the news programme. I wasted no time in organising it.

I have decorated the Manor to look like Versailles which isn't tricky as my father installed a miniature Hall of Mirrors when we first moved in. Ostentatious? Yes. Shows off our French heritage? Yes.

Camille looks around the Hall of Mirrors and Drake takes her hand. I forgot that Camille has ancestry from Versailles. Great. She can prove she now more noble than I am, well done Kiara.

'Wine?' I ask them. 'Vintage 1795, from Bordeaux.' A servant offers a tray filled with glasses.

Drake takes a glass but Camille waves it away. 'Thank you, Kiara, but I'll just have water.'

The servant nods and finds her a glass of water. I study her and look at the flushed look on her face, the pride that is etched on Drake's and I put two and two together. She is pregnant.

Camille has an heir.

That's even more stability for Cordonia if she were to be crowned Queen.

'So what are we to expect this evening, Kiara?' Drake asks me.

I smile. 'A tour of our vineyard, music and dinner. Camille, if you like, I can find you some alcohol free wine?'

She blinks. 'Uhh that won't be necessary but thank you.'

She knows I know.

'Ugh, alcohol free wine?' Olivia drawls, strolling up to us. 'Really? What's the point?'

Drake smirks. 'My feelings exactly. But thank you Kiara for the gesture.'

Olivia frowns. 'Gesture?'

Camille turns red and grabs Drake by the arm. 'Honey, let go see Maxwell, I need to find out how his book writing is going!'

Weak excuse. Clearly she doesn't want people to know yet. She and Drake leave and I turn to Olivia who is sipping a glass of wine and studying me.

'How are you, Olivia?'

'Just peachy,' she replies dryly. 'Excuse me, I'm going to go talk to a wall..'

She strides off, leaving me alone. Sighing, I down my glass of wine and go in search of someone who actually wants to talk to me at my own event.

**********************************************

Penelope

I'm with my parents in the car driving to Kiara's. We're running late thanks to my mother being indecisive over what earrings to wear but she finally picked a pair and now Thomas is practically gunning it down the highway.

My mother is scrolling through her online diary. 'Penelope, I've arranged for you to meet a suitor,' she tells me. 'It would be good if you had a partner so that when you become Queen, you can show more strength.'

I turn pale and grip the side of my seat. I see Thomas is trying his best to ignore the conversation but his hands are gripping the steering wheel and his knuckles have turned white.

'Really, mother, it's okay,' I protest. 'I don't want to be dating right now. I just want to focus on being Queen.'

My father grins warmly. 'That's our girl! Keep your eye on the prize!'

'But she would do well to have a match!' my mother cries. 'It would really boost her chances -'

'Penelope can do just perfectly on her own,' father interrupts, giving me a wink. 'She's always managed to hold her own.'

'Some people don't see that,' mother whispers. 'She can daydream too much in other company.'

'I can hear you, you know,' I cut in, my voice like ice. I see Thomas's eyes crinkle up in the car mirror as he smiles.

My father places his hand on my mother's, placating her. 'She's already shown her intelligence and kindness, Emme,' he assures her. 'Have faith.'

She sighs and looks at me apologetically. 'I'm sorry, honey. I'll be better. I'm just nervous, that's all.'

'It's okay, mom.'

She smiles. 'So you'll meet the boy I have lined up for you? You know his sister!'

Ezekial. Kiara's brother. No.

'I don't want to meet anyone,' I reply bluntly. 'I'm not even thinking about love.'

My eyes catch Thomas's and I will him to understand that I don't mean it, not really. I love him. I love him.

He nods and I feel relief. He understands.

**********************************************

Madeleine

Kiara's wine tour is fine. That's all I will say. Its understated but enough to show off her wealth and sophistication, especially when she drones on about flavours.

I watch Leo as he tastes a red wine. I know he is dying to just down it because this sort of event is not his thing in the slightest. A refined Prince, he is not.

I could have helped shape him if he let me. We could appreciate wine together and go to the polo and bet on the horses. We could go out to the theatre and the opera.

But Leo doesn't enjoy any of that.

Olivia is by his side which is becoming the norm. For someone who constantly says that she doesn't need a man, she is showing her true colours.

She eventually leaves his side and that's when I see my moment. Quickly I walk to where he is standing by the open bar.

'Leo,' I greet him. He smiles and kisses my hand.

'Maddie. Always a pleasure.'

I inch close to him, so close that I can smell the red wine on his breath. 'Are you free tonight?' I murmur.

His eyes flash over my shoulder to Olivia then quickly back again. I smile, pretending I haven't seen his hesitation or the reason for it.

'I'm quite busy tomorrow so need an early night..' He says weakly.

I am my mother's daughter. Although she may be a permanent drunk, she did teach me a few things. I place my hand on his crotch and squeeze hard.

Leo's eyes bulge. 'Maddie!' he gasps.

I smirk. 'Come on, Leo.. You know you want to. Just tonight. It's been so long.'

He closes his eyes. 'Okay. My room. Kiara assigned me the one on the third floor near the tower. 10pm.'

I release him, triumphant that I've won. I turn and walk away, deciding to prepare for tonight. I need my best lingerie.

*********************************************

Olivia

I see Leo racing towards me with a dark look on his face. He takes me by the arm and whispers, 'I need to talk to you.'

I follow him outside to the gardens and watch as Leo paces.

'Leo -'

'Madeleine is coming to my room tonight,' he tells me quickly. 'She wants me.'

I keep my poker face. He doesn't have to know that I'm disappointed. He doesn't have to know that I think things changed between us when he made love to me the other day.

I cross my arms. 'Okay. Happy fucking.'

He grabs me, his eyes wild. 'I'm going to end it with her,' he says. 'I only want you. Liv, I promise. These past six months have been incredible and its down to you, not her. You're the one I want. I know you're not one for declarations of love and neither am I, but I have to be honest here. I love you.'

We had both silently agreed that we had feelings. But we have never said the L word. Why would we?

But as I watch him looking utterly distraught and terrified, I know I feel the same. He makes me happy. He makes me see that just because you're with someone it doesn't make you less of yourself.

I kiss him.

'I love you too,' I whisper.

I feel his shoulders loosen and his smile against my mouth.

**********************************************

Madeleine

I'm wearing a white lace bralet and matching thong with stockings and suspenders. My eyes are lined with kohl and my hair is tousled.

I place a trench coat over it and with a final check in the mirror, I stride out of my room to Leo's.

I'm going to win him back. For too long, Olivia has had her talons in him. No longer. He is mine.

I reach his door and knock. I hear him shuffling and the door opens. 'Hey, Maddie,' he says, gesturing for me to come inside.

There's no candles or champagne cooling. No romantic music. None of the typical Leo Sex touches are here.

I cast this thought aside and unbutton my coat. It falls to the floor and Leo stares at me as I advance slowly on him. 'What do you think?' I ask huskily.

He is mine.

Leo swallows. 'You look lovely.'

I reach out and start to unbuckle his belt. 'Relax, Leo..'

'Maddie -'

I unbutton his trousers and push him onto his bed. Quickly, I straddle him and grind against his crotch. I can be sexy. I can be seductive.

He is mine.

Leo grabs my hands. 'Madeleine, no.'

He never calls me by my first name. He never tells me no.

I laugh it off and lean down to kiss him but he turns his head. I sit up and stare down at him, trying to be calm. 'What's wrong?' I ask. 'Can't get it up? Here, let me help -'

'No,' he grounds out. 'Madeleine, I'm sorry but I have to end this. I don't want to do this with you anymore.'

I blink.

But he is mine.

'Okay.. So you're giving up sex?' I ask, knowing it's a stupid question. 'Does that mean you're ending it with Olivia too?'

He looks at me like he's in pain. 'No.. Just you.'

But he is mine.

My heart is beginning to pound and my skin is blooming goosebumps. I feel sick.

He reaches out to stroke my hair but I push his hand away violently. He doesn't get to feel remorse.

'After everything I've done for you..' I murmur.

Leo closes his eyes. 'I know and I'm sorry. I just can't keep stringing you along -'

'So now you have feelings?!' I burst out. 'Cry me a fucking river!'

'Maddie -'

'I wanted us to rule together!' I cry, tears burning my vision. I can't stop talking. 'I dreamed of us being together and helping to raise Cordonia up! All I needed was for your brother to be gone and you to take the crown and make me your Queen!'

His eyes are huge. 'What? What are you talking -'

I push my hands on his chest and trap him under me. 'I killed your fucking brother,' I hiss in his ear. 'And this is how you repay me.'

He is mine.

Leo pushes me up. His eyes are like fire, filled with anger and horror. 'You.. You killed him?'

My secret is out.

'He needed to die!' I cry. 'He was ruining Cordonia! I kept thinking that you are the rightful king, you should replace him and have me by your side. So I planned his defeat. I tried to seduce him as a way to make him vulnerable,' I say, my voice shaking. I know I am ruining Leo's image of me. I know I can't take this back.

'He was all for it,' I tell him. 'Anything to make you feel like shit. So I got him under me, like you are right now, and I held him down and I suffocated him with a pillow.'

I reach out slowly and lift Leo's pillow. He is staring at me like a deer caught in headlights.

He is mine.

'All you had to do was take the throne,' I say. But you refused. I hoped that you would back me if I were to be Queen but it's become increasingly clear that you favour that orphaned slut -'

'Don't you dare speak about Olivia,' he hisses. 'You know nothing about her.'

I smirk. 'I don't care. She took you from me. You both ruined my plans.'

Leo stares at me in horror and realisation dawns on his face. 'You're the reason the room smelled of vanilla..'

'Bingo..' I sing.

I raise the pillow up. Lots eyes widen and he tries to grab my wrists but I knee him in the crotch. He lets out a strangled moan.

'If I can't have you, nobody can,' I hiss.

I push the pillow down onto his face. Leo shouts out and struggles but I keep him held in place. Tears flow down my cheeks. I have lost it. I've lost all sense of morality. I'm wild right now.

He is trying to scream for help but the pillow muffles his voice and I keep the pillow pressed to his face. His body jerks against me but I'm strong and he is losing a battle.

He stops.

I wait and slowly take the pillow off his face. He is slack and his chest is not moving. I let out a sob, knowing what I've done and that I can't take it back.

He was mine.

#trr fanfic

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mrs-dragneel-stark-solo · 4 years

Text

Unforseen Chasm (part 6)

Part 6 of Unforseen Chasm

Prompt: Two sisters fall for men that are absolute enemies. The love they have could tear all of them apart, or it could bring them together. Word Count: 1413 Note: This is by far the longest thing I’ve ever written (including my other fic series). first major Collab with my best friend @thorne93 what was first a simple “what if” moment turned into a two year writing session and I’ve never been more prouder of myself than when i started my first series. goes through most of the MCU plots there are some changes to accommodate for what we wanted and there is a bit of a crossover between the MCU and other characters. I hope you guys enjoy reading this just as much as I enjoyed writing it.

disclaimer: Parts 1-5 were background information and helped to set up the story so that you as the audience can understand how the reader ends up where she does.

Part 6 of this series is when the story shifts. Part 12 will kickstart a series of events that set a mood the rest of the entire fic series. So please bear with the story. It may start out slow, but we did this to build relationships, dynamics, understandings... Thor 1 is one of the FEW MCU films that we detailed. Many of the MCU films will not be this detailed and take up so many chapters. A lot of our content will take place outside of the MCU films, the gaps between the films. We didn't really want to just "rewrite" the MCU movies. Nothing in this series is filler. Every word has a purpose, every scene a reason.

When you landed, you were inside a large round open room. This must be the Bifrost.

Thor ordered the warriors to get themselves to a healing room, and you followed him, trying frantically to keep up.

“What’s going on?” you asked, nearly tripping over your own feet just to keep with his pace.

“I’m not sure, but my brother lying about our father’s death can not be good.”

“Why would he do that?”

“To keep me in exile, I’m sure.”

“But why does he want that?”

“I do not know.”

“Thor! I knew you’d return to us!” she said thankfully before pulling her son into an embrace.

“Why don’t you tell her?” Thor asked. “How you sent the Destroyer to kill our friends, to kill me!”

“What?” Frigga asked, standing next to you, acknowledging your presence briefly and politely with a quick look.

“Well, I must have been enforcing father’s last command,” he said with venom.

“You’re a talented liar, brother, always have been,” Thor remarked.

“It’s good to have you back. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to destroy Jotunheim.”

This left you and Frigga alone.

“Oh, dear,” she said shaking her head.

“Is… is he alright?” you asked, looking down the hall Loki just left.

“I’m afraid not,” she informed.

“Is that so?” she mused. “I’m Queen Frigga, it is a pleasure to meet you. Oh I do hope they quit fighting.”

“What has them so… at odds?” you asked as Frigga started to fret and scurry out of the bed chambers.

“My son...he found out he was adopted and I’m afraid he hasn’t taken the news as well as we had hoped…” she confessed.

“Adopted? Loki?” you inquired. That was never in any of the books.

“I never wanted the throne! I only ever wanted to be your equal!”

“I will not fight you, brother!”

“I’m not your brother, I never was!”

“Loki, this is madness!” Thor proclaimed.

“Is it madness? Is it? Is it?” he challenged, a sort of desperation in his tone. You approached slowly to the Bifrost, not wanting to startle either God.

When you entered, Loki’s mad eyes darted to you. They seemed erratic, crazed, but still as beautiful as ever.

“Your Majesty? Uh, King Loki?” you tried, entirely unsure how to address a mad King in a foreign land, that days ago was pretty much make-believe to you. “I know what you’re going through.”

“The human,” he mused, his head cocking to the side. “You brought back a souvenir?” Loki questioned, aiming it at Thor.

“She is not of Midgard, and you know it. You saw her with your own eyes and she saw you,” Thor insisted with a desperate plea, pointing to you with Mjolnir.

“So why bring her here?”

“You and I are nothing alike,” Loki vowed, coldness in his words.

But you kept slowly closing the gap.

“What does any of that have to do with me?” he demanded, looking down at you.

The truth was -- a lot.

His eyes fell to the floor, darting from left to right in thought. He slowly walked over to the center of the Bifrost, the staff powering the surge protruding from the middle of the key.

The two of you returned to the palace, where Odin had woken peacefully, and now rightfully back as king. And all seemed to settle into back into place…

Unforseen Chasm Tag list- @reigningqueenofwords @oldfreakything

Tag list- @cas-you-assbutt-dean-needs-you @winchester-writes @winchesterenthusiast @georgialouisea @deansdirtylittlesecretsblog @dammit-stark @livelikeawinchester @sammysbuttcheek @bran2015 @misz-adrii @sandlee44 @womanxofletters @natsuccs @childishhoebinoo @depressed-moose-78 @expecteddifferent @girl-next-door-writes @fanaticfanfiction @dakotapaigelove @sassy-spn-knight-of-hell

@adefectivedetective

@weclassygirl

#loki x reader #tony stark #tony stark x ofc #Odin #thor odison #loki laufeyson #queen frigga #unforseen chasm

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thedogsled · 5 years

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Do you ever just read Christmas movie titles and think how much better the films would be/how much more fun they’d instantly be if they were queer stories? I do. It’s my hobby. In fact it’s probably the only thing that gets me through the holiday period. Christmas films are typically terrible anyway and they’ve made so much trash now that UK freeview has a whole channel that just plays trashy Xmas films round and round, so why not examine this phenomenon with some examples, and share the dubious fun and inspiration of my holiday habit. (Quality of original movies is not under interrogation, mind, and some of these actually sound like fics I’ve read, but I’ll get back to that in a minute...)

Here goes. Imagine your OTP, I guess?

A cynical TV executive accidentally knocks herself out while railing against the disappointments of her life. She wakes up to find herself in another world, where she is married to another woman and they have two children. As she comes to realise she is not dreaming, she must decide which life she wants to live.

This next one is the plot of Bride Wars but I beg you to imagine it rewritten as a crossfandom story with your two OTPs please. The Rainbow Wedding Show Down. Anything you can imagine would be miles better than this movie anyway.

Two lifelong best friends discover their weddings have been scheduled on the same day and at the same venue. Neither is prepared to back down, so a bitter rivalry ensues as years of friendship are cast aside in the struggle to sabotage each other's big day.

I haven’t seen this one, and it’s got Shatner in it, so the version in my imagination is already much better. Also it’s the 6000th retelling of a Christmas Carol to nobody’s surprise ever. WHY? I just imagine the Hallmark execs sitting their writers down and saying “Right, we need at least ten new Christmas Carol based movies this year, we need unique new suggestions, but don’t say ‘except that she has a girlfriend’ or you’re insta-fired.”

A professor is torn between staying in her hometown and marrying the woman she loves or travelling across the country to pursue her dream job. One night, a mysterious coachman offers her a chance to travel three years into the future to see how her decision pans out.

I am 100% sure I’ve read the fic. If not, someone should write it for me anyway.

A New York teacher prepares to bring his new boyfriend, a diplomat from a small European nation, home to meet his parents at Christmas. However, he gets a shock when he learns that said boyfriend is secretly the heir to his country's throne - and his parents do not approve of their relationship.

Oh my god the fluff /suffocates underneath the cotton softness of this prompt. I’d imagine my OTP, but, you know, one of them is afraid of flying...

A single father invites a flight attendant to spend Christmas with him and his daughter after he misses his connection.

*pteradactylBisexual screeching noises* Or maybe this is a polyamory story WE JUST DON’T KNOW.

A woman is thrilled after her boyfriend invites her to his family's lake house for Christmas, but is disappointed when he spends all his time working. She befriends his assistant, but is unaware that she is secretly in love with her until a twist of fate leaves them alone together.

The heterosexualness is genuinely killing me by this point, I’m suffering for all of you. Also I’m changing the gender of this one because all the romance stories are about sad lonely white women. Gee, better wish for a man to come and save you from your miserable empty lives, ladies! HAPPY CHRISTMAS!

A man loses his job, his flat and his boyfriend just before Christmas - all thanks to his mischievous pet dog. A co-worker invites him to come and spend the holiday with him on his farm, and the experience leaves him torn between pursuing a new life in the country or trying to rebuild his old city life.

If you read the next one without heteronormativity goggles on it’s already gay. This one could go so many ways. In the straight version I imagine the boss is a harpy and the designer destroys his existing relationship... /Googles for a second. Oh wait, I’ve seen this one. Yes. That is what happens, to absolutely nobody’s surprise. Nothing’s more Christmassy than this bitch, amirite? It would make an amazing polyamory story, I really wish that was what I’d watched instead.

An aspiring designer impulsively kisses a man she meets in a lift, only to discover he is her boss's boyfriend. She is given the task of decorating his house for a lavish Christmas party, but begins to fall in love with him - while he does not remember their previous encounter.

The next one leaves me in a weird position because I’ve watched the “queer” version already /bitter noises about 2007. The only difference is that this one is actually a romance, because presumably the two of them slowly realize that they do love each other, and that, my friends, is one of my favorite fanfic tropes ever, so...

Sparks fly between a graphic designer and his male counterpart when they agree to a loveless marriage of convenience to help each other out.

Next. I’m just saying if you complicate this plot a little bit with Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell it becomes a heartbreaking story of discovery and community coming together instead of just another bland romance with a 6.1 on IMDB.

A war widow and an injured soldier join forces to save the town's military museum with a Christmas fundraiser.

I could go on. This is just two days of programming, mostly on the aforementioned 24 hour Christmas channel. Girl meets boy in suffocating heterosexual repeat. But you know what? As a reader and a writer of fanfiction, it just makes me feel so lucky to be in this community where these stories DO exist, where I can click a button and read a story about a grumpy police detective who bonds with his male partner when they get trapped in a lift together on Christmas day. Cause they ain’t gonna put it on TV.

The severe lack of anything warm wholehearted and queer for any holiday makes me angry, nvm the fact that in these stories only white women experience romance, they’re only ever romanced by white guys, and having a decent job means you’re doomed to loneliness forever. So while you can tear my hideously tropey smushy hurt comfort fanfic from my cold dead hands, at least I have “And there was only one bed” to retreat back to. In the greater scheme of things, tis the season to stab Straight White Christmas in the eye for marginalizing everybody else as well HOHOHO ASSHOLES.

P.S. Fuck you, NBC, for suggesting that Holiday in Handcuffs is a gay movie because it has a gay side character, and fuck you Hallmark Publishing, who a year ago said same sex relationships are fine, and they’d be up for making movies about the content they published, but to this day only straight (white) books have been put on the market. Nice. Well guess what, I have a greetings card for you:

#long post for ts #tis the season #not spn #in defense of fanfiction

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sushigirlali · 6 years

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Finding You - Part I (Reylo Fanfic)

Part I - Part II - Part III - Part IV - Part V - Part VI - Part VII - Part VIII - Part IX

Summary: Unseen forces move against Kylo Ren from within the First Order as he struggles to unravel Snoke’s deceptions / Rey must balance her relationship with Ben Solo and her dedication to the cause that opposes him / Leia Organa makes a desperate plea to an old friend in a last ditch effort to restore the Resistance. Pairing: Rey x Kylo Ren/Ben Solo [Reylo] [ReyBen] Continuity: Set directly after Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi ends. Warnings: There will be a lemon in Part II Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars or anything that relates to Star Wars.

A/N: The Last Jedi is everything I wanted and thought I’d never get!! Honestly, I’m still a little stunned that Reylo is canon. I was just hoping they weren’t related! It’s a Christmas miracle! This fic will be presented in three parts, and is paired with the song Finding You by Kesha off the Rainbow album. You can find me on FanFiction.net as sushigirlali as well. Enjoy!

Finding You - Part I By: sushigirlali

I wanna lay in your arms when the world is burning I wanna dig in your heart, take away your hurting Kiss me and tell me I'm fine and forget we’re dying

Rey fiddled with the busted control panel she was supposed to be fixing. The escape pod on the starboard side of the Millennium Falcon had taken some damage during the battle on Crait. It should have been a quick job, but Rey just couldn’t seem to focus on the task at hand.

“Did he know?” she muttered to herself distractedly. “Did he know that I was on the Falcon?”

Rey chewed her lip, trying to concentrate on the web of wires before her.

“Ow!” she gasped as sparks suddenly erupted from a nearby junction.

Pulling her singed fingers back, Rey turned around—and nearly ran right into the dark robed man before her.

“What—Ben?” she looked up, shocked at seeing him so soon after their last connection on Crait.

They stared at each other in tense silence, taking inventory. Rey was glad to see that he wasn’t injured, that he was okay. He looked absolutely livid, to be sure, but whole. Rey opened her mouth to speak, but Ben beat her to it.

“Despite your best efforts, I’m still alive.” Kylo Ren said, his dark eyes bright with fury.

“Ben!” Rey objected. “You can’t really believe I want you dead!”

“Why not?! I offered you the galaxy and you turned on me without a second thought!” he accused.

“That’s not true! I wanted—want—to help you, but not at the expense of what’s left of the Resistance.” She tried to reason.

“The Resistance is nothing but a band of inept dissidents who have deluded themselves into believing that they can defeat a more powerful force with nothing but sentiment and luck!”

“The Resistance is made up of the bravest, most decent people that I have ever met! Don’t you dare speak about them like that!” Rey’s voice rose as she defended her friends. “I had to leave! I had to save them!”

“You left me unconscious before a broken throne with hell raining down around me!” he charged roughly. “You left me to die!”

“Ben, I checked to make sure you were breathing before—”

“YOU. LEFT. ME.”

The pure anguish in his tone tore through her. But she knew, deep down, that no matter how much he was hurting, giving into him now would spell doom for them both. He wasn’t ready to turn back to the light, not yet.

Still, she wanted to offer some comfort. Rey reached toward him, but he caught her hand halfway.

“Ouch!” Rey protested as he grasped the burnt fingers of her left hand.

His grip softened automatically, soothingly, but he didn’t let go.

“You gave me no choice, Ben.” She replied firmly. “I can’t be what you want. I won’t.”

“Then we’re at an impasse.” His voice was harsh, unwavering.

“Ben--”

“Ben Solo is dead. Kylo Ren is the only name I answer to.” Kylo said resolutely.

“Why do you have to be so stubborn! I only want what’s best for you! I’ve seen your future! It doesn’t have to be this way!” Rey snatched her hand away as frustrated tears streamed down her porcelain cheeks.

“The future doesn’t come to order, Rey. It’s something that happens to you, and if you’re not strong enough to cope with it, it will destroy you.” The hand that had been holding hers clenched at his side.

“Like Luke’s betrayal destroyed you?” Rey asked softly.

“You go too far!” Kylo snapped back.

“Ben, you don’t know Luke’s side of it. I know this is difficult to talk about, but there’s something I need to tell you.” Rey pleaded with him.

“His side of it?!” Kylo snarled. “My master, my mentor, my uncle tried to murder me in cold blood! While I was sleeping! Defenseless! And you dare to defend him?!”

“Ben, there’s more to it than that. Luke told me that he sensed your dark side was rising, yes, but that when the moment came he—”

But suddenly her surroundings came back into focus.

“Rey?” a familiar voice asked hesitantly from the doorway.

She glanced around, cursing the interruption, but knowing that she would forgive her best friend.

“Yes, Finn?”

“Dinner is ready. We’re waiting for you.” Finn said with a concerned expression. “Is everything alright?”

“What? Oh, yes. I’ll be along shortly.”

Finn nodded and went back up the entry ramp. Rey slumped down against the wall dejectedly once he turned the corner. Nursing her burnt fingers, she blew out an angry breath.

She needed to tell Ben what Luke had imparted to her. Once Ben knew the whole truth, when he understood that Luke had made a grave mistake, she hoped that he could finally start to heal. Rey knew the wound was deep, how could it not be, but she didn’t believe it was irreversible.

Now that Snoke was dead, and his disgusting influence lifted, Ben could finally have his mind back. This didn’t absolve him of the horrible choices he had made on behalf of the First Order and his master, on behalf of his own misguided lust for power, but Rey suspected Snoke had been leeching the light out of Ben Solo for longer than any of them knew.

That kind of long running mental and physical abuse left deep scars. Still, she refused to give up hope. The link between them was strong, despite Snoke’s death. And that thought would give her solace for the difficult times ahead. The Resistance needed Ben Solo, she needed Ben Solo. Now if only she could convince him of that.

Kylo Ren paced his private quarters, fuming. How dare she presume to lecture him about Luke Skywalker! His lip curled. Skywalker. The last Jedi Master. Destroyer of the Emperor and Darth Vader. Attempted murderer of his only nephew.

“His side.” Kylo mocked, furious at the implication.

There was only one side—Kylo’s. Luke Skywalker was a coward who only challenged his betters when they’re backs were turned. And yet…something at the edge of his mind nudged him that there was more to the story. Something that had been obscured. By Snoke? He didn’t know for sure. Not yet at least. But with the death of his master, Kylo’s mind was clearing.

Maybe Rey did know something. He should have forced her to tell him, before they were interrupted. As soon as he thought it, Kylo smirked. Right. Like he’d ever been successful in forcing her to do anything.

Kylo recalled their argument and flinched. He’d charged in with accusations and anger, but she seemed relieved, almost happy, to see him again. He didn’t know if he could forgive her for betraying him, though. He had offered to share his ambition, his very life, with her, and she had rejected him.

No, she hadn’t just rejected him, she'd also attempted to attack him. With his grandfather’s lightsaber nonetheless! But while he was knocked out, vulnerable, she hadn’t slit his throat. She had left. Was she so sure of her premonition? Did she really believe that he would turn to the light?

And what did Rey know about Skywalker? He was curious now. Next time he saw her, he’d listen. Not because he believed he was wrong, but because she believed she was right.

I wanna feel you tonight like the very first time Let's run away, baby, drive straight into the moonlight Kiss me and tell me you're mine like no one’s watching Like time is stopping

It was three days before he saw her again. And while it had been an agonizing wait, the time alone had given Kylo perspective. The more time passed, the more Kylo realized how often Snoke had infiltrated his mind. It seemed that he had always been there, lurking in the shadows. And the sudden absence of his master now, after so many years, caused Kylo great disquiet.

There were things in his memory, terrible things, deeply buried, that were suddenly available to him. But he was afraid to look at them directly. At least, not until he could give himself context. As a result, Kylo had taken to deep meditation over the last few days, determined to root out how it all began.

Focusing inward, Kylo traveled into the past, reliving pivotal moments in his life—trying to understand what had brought him to this point. His mind opened as the stain of Snoke’s concealment receded.

He could see it now, how it started. Even as a child, as far back as he could stretch his mind to remember, Snoke had been with him. Snoke was subtle at first, merging their minds a little at a time, making sure never to penetrate too deeply. And once young Ben Solo had begun to bond with the soft, authoritative voice in his head, Snoke had imprinted on Kylo’s lonely soul with false promises of companionship and understanding.

As Kylo grew older, he started to resist Snoke’s invasion. The presence became uncomfortable, demanding. And like his parents, Ben Solo was not one to bow to orders. The turning point, yes, he could see it clearly now, was the night that Skywalker had crept into his room to murder him. The old Jedi had sensed his growing power, and the dark connection that bolstered it.

But was that what actually happened? He had always believed so without a doubt, reinforced by Snoke’s insistence. Or was Rey right? Was there another side to the story? If his uncle’s true intention had not been to kill him, then what had it been?

Kylo stepped outside of himself, examining the scenario from an objective position. Skywalker was reading his mind that night, looking for evidence of corruption. But…it wasn’t all Kylo. Snoke was there as well, feeding the darkness within until it was all Skywalker could see.

The horrified look on his uncle’s face disturbed Kylo. His old master looked pained, and panic stricken. As he pulled out his lightsaber, Kylo saw the indecision there, the fear. But also, a realization that his actions were impulsive and wrong. And then, just as Skywalker moved to turn off his lightsaber, he realized that Ben was awake.

Kylo came out of the memory slowly, adjusting to the dim light of his personal command shuttle. He had taken to utilizing the private cabin aboard the spacecraft when he needed to meditate, preferring the confined solitude to the main living decks in the crowded Star Destroyer. The cabin doubled as a troop carrier compartment during battle.

Lifting himself off the bed, Kylo tightened the silken belt around his waist. He liked to use a lighter, less repressive robe during meditation; the weightless texture allowed him to reach out to the Force with ease. It was something he wore only when alone, however, because Kylo always felt more vulnerable out of uniform.

Still, merging with the Force had been demanding on both his mind and body this time. It had taken a great deal of willpower to uncover Snoke’s smokescreen. Kylo walked over to a basin near the door and splashed cool water across his face and neck. Whipping the excess off with a plush towel, Kylo contemplated what he had seen through the Force.

The burning hatred he had harbored toward his uncle all his life was still there, but tempered as reason took over. The man had been a coward, coming in the dead of night to test his own nephew instead of speaking with him in the light of day. If only they had talked about the unspoken thing inside him—about the dark side. But neither Ben Solo, nor Luke Skywalker, had taken that course.

Kylo knew now that the blame wasn’t solely on Skywalker’s shoulders. He had contributed to the situation with his silence, his fear of admitting that something—someone—had taken a hold of him. He had been Ben Solo, son of the great rebel war heroes Princess Leia Organa and General Han Solo. He was the nephew of one of the greatest Jedi Masters to ever live.

And yet, he had failed them all. He had killed his own father in the misguided belief that Han Solo’s death would bring closure to the gaping wound in his soul. At the time, he’d felt betrayed and abandoned at every turn, by his entire family. He had felt justified in his vengeance. But now, all he felt was empty.

His mother and father had never given up on him, had never given up hope that one day he would return to the light. And now, with all the knowledge he had gained, Kylo Ren had to admit for the first time that he had been wrong. Luke Skywalker had made a mistake, but he, not his uncle, had destroyed Ben Solo’s life. And as a result, his family, who had loved him, was broken beyond repair.

Casting aside the towel in a fit of anger, Kylo whirled to find Rey standing before him. He must have looked fearsome because she took a quick step back.

“Ben, are you…alright?” She asked hesitantly.

Kylo didn’t answer her; he couldn’t. He knew he should, that he had a lot to explain to her, but he couldn’t speak because the words were choking him. He needed more time to process the shocking revelations of the last hour. When he didn’t speak, Rey took the lead.

“Ben, I need to tell you about Luke. Now. Before we’re interrupted again.” She started imploringly. When he didn’t make a move to interrupt, she continued, “Luke told me what happened. He did go into your room that night. Not with the intention of killing you, but he was testing you all the same. And when he saw the darkness in you, when he saw what Snoke was doing to you, he overreacted. But he never would have killed you! His mistake cost you your life, your family, your soul! And he never forgave himself for it. So, you see, it wasn’t all your fault! There’s still time to come back, to join me on the right side.”

She was almost panting as she finished speaking. It was one of the many things that he admired about her—her passion for life, her goodness. Despite her desolate upbringing, Rey was the most accepting person he had ever met. She strived to bring people together in an effort to create what she had been denied all her life: a family.

He understood her, and she him. Though their circumstances were wildly different, the aching loneliness was the same. And so, as he gazed into her pleading eyes, Kylo felt his strength flow back into him. He could put aside any weakness when she was near. His soul rose up to meet hers, his equal in the Force. His balance.

“Rey, I believe you.” Kylo told her.

Her eyes widened, shocked by his easy acceptance. Clearly, she had worked herself up over the last few days and was expecting a fight.

“You…you do?” she asked in wonder.

He nodded. “I’ve been meditating. There are periods in my life that have always escaped me, no matter how hard I concentrated.”

“Snoke.” Rey said with disgust.

“Yes.” Kylo acknowledged. “He was in my mind almost my entire life, blocking off connections, blurring memories. It’s difficult work to discover where the suppression lies. As I clear out the cobwebs in my mind, however, the truth is beggining to take shape.”

“So…you’ve already seen everything I just told you?” she asked a little sharply.

The barest hint of a smile titled his lips. “Yes, I have.”

“And here I’ve been, going out of my mind with worry about you!” Rey huffed.

“You were worried about me?” Kylo asked, surprised. “Why?”

“Well, I didn’t know if you were going to fly off the handle after I left. I certainly didn’t expect you to investigate the situation on your own.” She said honestly.

“Why not?”

“You seemed so angry with me, Ben.” Rey bit her lip. “I thought you would just ignore everything I said and brood until we met again.”

“I was angry, very angry, at first. But the more I thought about what you said, the more curious I became. I knew you weren’t lying to me, that you believed in what you were saying, so I decided to uncover the truth for myself.” He told her.

Rey moved closer to him, her eyes bright. “I’m so proud of you.”

Kylo felt something lift in his chest, like a burden being removed. “I’m sorry for the way I behaved, for not listening to you earlier.” He replied.

“I understand why you were so upset. But, please, just talk to me in the future. I don’t like fighting with you.” Rey beseeched him.

“I’ll do my best.” Kylo agreed.

“Ben, there’s something else.” Rey started cautiously. “Something I wanted to ask you.”

“Anything.”

“Did you know that I was on the Millennium Falcon when the First Order tried to shoot it out of the sky on Crait?” Rey asked, frowning.

Kylo was stunned. No, he had not known. How could he not have known? Their connection was strong, but he had been blinded by rage, by a sense of deep betrayal after waking up alone in the throne room. He still felt it now, to a lesser degree, if he was honest with himself. But if he’d been in control on Crait, it would have been more than obvious that Rey was in command of his father’s vessel.

In his anger, he could have lost Rey. He could have killed her.

“I didn’t know.” Kylo fell to his knees in front of her, head bowed. “Please forgive me.”

Rey stared at the proud man in front of her, her heart pounding. Their previous meetings had shown him to be honest to the point of insolence, but this contrite response was beyond her wildest expectations. She had anticipated an argument at the very least, but looking at Ben now, Rey felt ashamed for doubting his feelings for her.

“Ben, I believe you.” Rey said, repeating his words back to him.

Ben lifted his head, as if soaking in Rey’s radiant smile.

“Here,” she said, holding out her hands, “I’ll help you up.”

He hesitated for a second, but allowed her to pull him up. Electricity raced up her arms from where their bare hands melded together. He wasn’t wearing gloves, for once, and his rigid uniform had been replaced by a lightweight black silk robe.

Rey blushed as they continued to hold hands, as she tried not to stare at him.

“Rey,” Ben said quietly, “how did you get back aboard that ship?”

“After I left,” she stopped herself from saying ‘you’, “the throne room, I knew that the Falcon was the only chance for the Resistance to survive, so I took Snoke’s escape vessel and signaled Chewy to pick me up. The chaos created by Holdo’s sacrifice covered my escape.”

“I’m sorry I put you in that position. I still believe that the past needs to be put to rest, but I shouldn’t have tried to sway you from helping your friends.” Ben told her seriously.

Rey felt hope swell up inside her at his words. She still had so much to learn about the Force, about life, but she believed Ben was being sincere. It was clear that everything he had seen while mediating over the last few days had had a profound effect on him.

“I don’t care if it’s selfish or silly of me, but I don’t want to choose. I didn’t then and I don’t now.” She confessed. “I want it all—you and my friends.”

Ben’s eyes burned into hers in response, innumerable emotions swirling in their dark depths. Bringing up his ungloved hands, he cupped her cheeks. She quivered in response; it was the most intimate touch she had ever received.

“Why are you here? Why has the Force connected us?” Ben asked huskily.

“Don’t you know?” she whispered coyly.

He shook his head. “You deserve better.”

“I deserve you.” She said boldly. “I’ve been alone all my life until now. Suddenly I have friends—family—and I’m not scared of opening up to them anymore. I owe that to you, to the trust we’ve built between us. Now stop implying that our connection isn’t mutual!”

Ben smiled slightly, then reached down for her left hand, lifting her knuckles to his lips. The burn she had sustained a few days ago was mostly healed, but Rey felt her face heat at the sweet gesture.

“Okay,” he conceded, his tone holding a wealth of apology and acceptance.

Rey beamed up at him, curling her fingers tighter into his. Raising her other hand, Rey pushed back Ben’s lush hair, framing his cheek. Then, with all the courage she possessed, Rey stood on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his, sealing their bond for all time.

A/N: In my mind, there has to be a lot of meditating and talking to get to a point where Kylo Ren is ready to be Ben Solo again; I want his turn to the light to feel earned. Part II will be posted sometime next week, once I button up Part III, and will include some lemony goodness! You can find me over on FanFiction.net as sushigirlali as well.

A little something extra!

Kylo: Who hurt you? Ali: …what? Kylo: Why are all your favorite male characters in need of a redemption arc? Ali: Because I’m a slut for complex character development? Kylo: It’s because they always wear all black, isn’t it? Ali: Ummm…no? Kylo: You a freak. Ali: Oh, you’re one to talk, Cry-lo Ren!!

#my fanfiction #finding you #reylo fanfiction #reyben fanfiction #reylo #reyben #rey #kylo ren #ben solo #otp #sushigirlali

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surveystodestressme · 6 years

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85.

5000 Question Survey Pt. 22

2001. Can you believe that we have only gotten through two fifths of this survey so far? i believe it 2002. What is your opinion of Dave Coulier? i have no idea who that is 2003. If you were to a write a Choose Your Own Adventure book, what would it be about? horror 2004. What was your best find from a flea market, garage sale, ebay or thrift store? huh? 2005. What do you not have enough money for right now? a new car

2006. Do you believe that Teras for Fears were right when they said, “Everybody wants to rule the world?” eh 2007. What is the design on your beach towel? i don’t have a beach towel 2008. What stirs something deep and animalistic inside you? mean fucking people 2009. Have you ever cross dressed (even as a joke)? no 2010. Do you own anything with a rainbow on it? yes lol my boyfriends mom buys pj pants for everyone on christmas and this year she got me rainbow pants with minions on them....... i’ve NEVER even seen despicable me 2011. What would be the worst object for a child to take on a long car ride with you? a loud handheld game 2012. What’s the Best Beatles song in your opinion? help 2013. Why do you suppose that diary sites are more popular with females than males? idk 2014. What do these color combinations remind you of: orange and pink: ice cream pink and green: fruit green and gold: nature purple and gold: idk gold and red: royalty red and white: america blue and grey: the beach 2015. What is one selfish thing you tend to do? let people buy me stuff 2016. When do you think technology will catch up with the Jetson’s? idk 2017. What made you laugh today? my lab partners 2018. Do you ever stick your entries in any of the diary circles? no. 2019. Can you freestyle rap? i could try but it wouldn’t be that good 2020. Are you: stylish? somewhat shiek? huh? smart? i think so 2021. Do you find you self only buying brand name products? i do not care about name brands 2022. Would you ever want to buy an article of clothing or an accessory because you saw a celebrity wear it? i don’t pay attention to celebrities enough 2023. What song do you feel the sexiest dancing to? buttons by pussycat dolls 2024. Who do you know who looks silly when they dance? my dad 2025. Sweaty sex or clean sex? a lil bit of both honestly 2026. Which is more important to you: being kind or being right? i mean both honestly. 2027. Can you do any special dances like swing, tap, or ballroom? i used to do tap 2028. Are you scared of monsters? nada 2029. Who would you like to remind people of? idc 2030. Do you walk to school or do you bring your lunch? neither???? 2031. Rate your skills from one to ten (10 = you are the best at it): socializing: 5 making friends: 5 working with computers: 5 arts: 7 crafts: 7 dancing: 2 skating: 6 talking other people into things: 8 writing: 9 living life to the fullest each day: 5 cooking: 3 gardening: 2 cleaning up after yourself: 9 playing poker: 1 surviving in the woods: 3 managing your time: 8 attracting the opposite sex (or same sex if you prefer)? 4 2032. Have you ever been to an indian reservation? nope 2033. What is going to happen tomorrow that you can celebrate, even if it’s a little thing? idk 2034. Do you save things for special occasions or is everyday a special occasion? i save things. 2035. What is one thing you are terrible at: saving money 2036. What’s your favorite: rap song: love the way you lie country song: we danced industrial song: idk. cover song: cant help falling in love with you punk song: idk odd song: cotton eye joe 2037. What do you get your teacher or your boss for the holidays? not a thing lol 2038. Do you like to read books by Virgina Wolfe? never read any. 2039. What is your favorite tv show from when you were a kid? spongebob 2040. What is now proved was once only imagined. - William Blake. What do you imagine? the future. 2041. What has been passed down through at least two generations to you? nothing 2042. Do we live in a particularly bad age for romance? i don’t think so 2043. Have you ever cheated on someone? nope Do you believe that once someone is a cheater they can never be trusted? yes 2044. Have you ever gone: christmas caroling? nope pumpkin picking? yeah on a hay wagon ride? yes on a romantic valentine’s day date? yeah to a new year’s eve party? a couple times to a memorial day parade? yeah to the Macy’s thanksgiving day parade? maybe in the past to search for gold coins on st patrick’s day? no. 2045. Have you ever done any modeling? nope 2046. Would you consider yourself to be psychologically damaged? not that i can think of 2047. How aware are you of the reasons behind your actions and words? very aware 2048. What is the sickest you ever drank or drugged yourself? i haven’t had any really bad experiences tbh. it’s always a shitty time when i’ve thrown up from alcohol but i’ve never blacked out. 2049. Would you prefer it if clothing was optional? no lol. 2050. What is one interesting fact about you: i collect shot glasses 2051. Are more people depressed because they are alone, or are more people alone because they are depressed? they’re more depressed bc they’re alone probably but there are way more complicated reasons as to why people are depressed 2052. Have you ever gotten a mug, t-shirt, key chain, etc. that was personalized with your picture? no lol 2053. What was the last thing that you experienced for the first time? i don’t know 2054. If you were going to die tomorrow and you were leaving a postcard for someone to read after you were gone what would it say? i dunno. 2055. If you were about to be executed what would your last request be? tell my family that i love them 2056. What kinds of people do you find intimidating? too many people lol 2057. How much conviction do you have in your feelings and beliefs? quite a bit. 2058. In your house where is the: crazy glue? in the junk drawer flashlight? above the snack cabinet 2059. Out of everyone you know who has the most personality? there’s plenty of people lol 2060. If you could go back in time to experience a musical movement or era, which one would you choose to live through? none 2061. Do you suffocate people with your love? sometimes 2062. Do you feel your life is charmed? no. 2063. What character do you identify the most with from Winnie the Pooh? piglet 2064. When do you do your best thinking? in the shower or on the toilet 2065. What motivates you? food 2066. Look back at all the people you’ve dated. Has there been a pattern? not that i can think of 2067. Things change but what will always remain the same for you? i don’t know 2068. Is divorce something you would ever consider or do you feel that marriage is permanantly binding? i would preferably not get divorced. 2069. What’s the strangest movie you ever saw? the abc’s of death 2070. If you could go into virtual reality and set up your life there to be perfect and it would seem real but not be real would you trade your life now for the virtual life? it’d be cool but no 2071. Does it seem like life is more difficult for you than for anyone else? nope 2072. What are you grateful for? everything i have. 2073. What was a choice that you didn’t want to make but you had to? idk. 2074. Have you ever had dental surgery? no. 2075. At what point exactly are you grown up? when you have bills and you feel like you’re drowning 2076. If there was a weight loss procedure that would destroy your ability to taste food so you wouldn’t be tempted by junk food, would you have it done? absolutely not 2077. What is one thing that happened that you never expected? finding someone i love who actually loves me back 2078. If you called one of your friends and they said “It’s nothing personal but I don’t want to talk to anyone right now,” would you take it personally? nah, i’ve had moments like that too so i can understand 2079. What is your favorite girl’s name? i don’t really have one 2080. Do you ever feel guilty for being more fortunate than others? not really. 2081. If you had to wear a shirt with one word on it for a year, what word would you choose? kok 2082. What is evian spelled backwards? naive 2083. You drop 10 pounds of feathers and a ten pound bowling ball off the top of the same building. Which will hit the ground first? they both weigh the same, sooo both 2084. Even though you may never get what you want, are you happy because you’re trying? yes 2085. If you started a petition what would it be about? idk. 2086. When was the last time you asked someone to do something and they said no? everytime i ask jack to do something he says no but does it anyways 2087. Do bad things happen to you on friday the 13th? not that i know of. 2088. What’s your favorite: Madonna song? - John Lennon song? - Michael Jackson song? billy jean Doors song? - Rolling Stones song? - David Bowie song?- Elvis song? cant help falling in love with you 2089. If you had started a relationship with someone and they said that it would be best if no one knew about it just to see how it goes, would you be offended? it depends ig but id feel like they just wanted to hide me 2090. Do you know any self defense? not really How about CPR? i know the concept of it but ive never really practiced or anything 2091. If you had to look into a mirror and see your naked soul stripped of all delusions and pretenses (Never ending Story style)could you handle it? maybe 2092. Are you a genius? no. 2093. How did you find out that Santa Clause wasn’t real? i got a letter from ‘him’ and the handwriting was the same as my dads 2094. Which is your favorite tarot card? i dont do that shit 2095. Does the internet separate people or connect them? both. 2096. Have you ever written a letter to a soldier? my brother and my sister and some of my friends when they were all in the military 2097. Does pain and fear make you feel alive? to a a certain degree 2098. Are you: good looking? yeah thin? no. happy? yes successful? not yet confident? for the most part 2099. Are you decisive or wishy washy? in between. 2100. Do you feel pop stars should be morally responsible to set a good example for their fans? it’s nice but they shouldn’t be obliged to.

#bored #quiz #questions #survey

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toradh · 7 years

Text

Minutes of me watching the, luckily, last episode of ToZX

Warning: lots of capslock, lots of cursing. I finally figured out how to put things under a cut, hooray! Beware of obvious spoilers for the game, the anime, AND Tales of Berseria ahead. It’s also a goddamn long post.

0:00: *has just made the bad mistake to eat a whole litre of vla. Very hyper, hands are shaking, tummy ache* Okay, Ufotable. DO YOUR WORST.

No opening? I can deal. Didn’t expect it anyway. No anime ever plays the opening in the last episode, right? I don’t like it, anyway.

0:20: Yes, I know, it’s Captain Planet, go ahead and do shit

0:30 I’m kinda disappointed that the Captain Planet theme isn’t actually playing

0:58: No, it looks plain silly. NO CAPES, DAMN IT Btw are the girls just gonna stand there in the background for the entire episode?

1:20: Yeah, looks like Captain Planet mode sucks after all. Btw if I wasn’t still sick, I’d take a sip for Meebo shouting “Sorey!”

1:29: You’re saying that NOW, Lailah? And is Heldalf just gonna stand there and watch the whole time?

2:08: I want Sorey’s hair conditioner

2:30: I honestly can’t read my shaky sugar-induced and rage-fueled handwriting for that minute anymore, but the last words seem to suggest that I was bitching about Anime!Sorey being a Gary Stu. Speaking of shaky handwriting, most „2“ in this post might as well be a „1“ and vice versa, hard to tell

2:48: NO, SOREY. YOU FUCKING CAN’T. WHO WROTE HIM SUDDENLY BEING ABLE TO DO THINGS THAT THE ENTIRE GAME IS MAKING HIM LEARN THAT HE CAN’T. And I can’t even do English anymore

2:57: Yay the good songs are back I also wanna use these nifty rainbow magic dual element spells

3:37: …You still can’t, you know

3:47: Okay girls, I see you’re bored and wanna do something, BUT YOU REALLY SHOULDN’T BE ABLE TO, OK? YOU SHOULDN’T EVEN BE HERE. NOBODY SHOULD BE IN THAT FRIGGIN’ VOLCANO ACTUALLY

3:56: Hi Dezel!

4:00: I’m touched that Dezel opted to ship RosAli and has given the girls his blessing

4:10: Sorey, if the Gay Pride Armatus is that exhausting to use, I’d suggest you stop wasting your breath with cheesy speeches

4:38: DAT’S SOME BFS DAT’S THE BUSTER SWORD OF GAY PRIDE

4:44: At least they somehow… reshaped that sweet sequence from the original game’s opening animation where Sorey and all Seraphim unanimously punch Heldalf. Okay, this is a sweet but sorry attempt at a decent battle scene.

5:03: WTF FUCKING WHY I JUST – *inhales deeply* Heldalf, you’re fucking doing it wrong, Velvet would be disappointed with you

5:28: That’s some ugly CGI malevolence

5:55: EVEN IN THE MANGA THEY HAD FIGURED OUT BEFORE THE FINAL BATTLE THAT THE LAND AND LA– MAOTELUS ARE CORRUPTED, AND THAT THING HAS ONLY 19 CHAPTERS! HOW HARD CAN IT BE!? BTW YOU’D KNOW IF YOU HAD EVER BOTHERED TO TALK TO MUSE YOU BASTARDS

6:30: What was the Gay Pride Armatus even good for? LAP–– I MEAN MAOTELUS, PLEASE INTERVENE, DO YOUR FUCKING JOB AS GOD

8:00: SEAL? JUST KILL YOU DUMB IDIOT, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD

8:10: Oh no Meebo, please don’t cry OH SHIT NO IF THAT’S NOT THE LOOK OF A BROKEN HEART THEN IT’S ON MY FACE RIGHT NOW

8:20: ARGLBLARGL NO NO NO DON’T PLAY JOURNEY’S END IN THE BACKGROUND, OH GOD WHY DOESN’T SOMEBODY (=Sorey. Or Maotelus with a Deus Ex Machina move, come on, I’ve been so waiting for it) FINALLY END MEEBO’S SUFFERING

8:40 OH MAN ANIME!SOREY FOR WORST BOYFRIEND EVER

9:03: IT’S GONNA BE THE PURPLE PROSE AU

9:14: *hands over tissues and chocolate* Meebo, you know, this whole show doesn’t make any sense whatsoever, anyway, so there’s absolutely no need for Sorey to pull through with this heroic sacrifice but kinda not at all shit thing

9:20: SOMEONE GIVE THAT POOR BOY A HUG FOR CRYING OUT LOUD

9:24: I doubt he’s listening right now, Sorey, and you really deserve a punch or two

10:34: WHERE WAS THAT DREAM THE LAST FUCKING 24 EPISODES!!!!!!!!?????????????

10:40: I’D TAKE A SIP IF I WASN’T STILL SICK AND SOBBING

10:59: Yeah, Alisha, I’m glad you’re still alive, too. Who even suggested that squire-killing risk in the first place

11:09: HI CUTIE-PIE! Okay I admit it, part of me who was already used to being spoilered just wanted to see cute baby Laphi turning back his adorable seraph self. Screw this BTW SHOULDN’T YOU KINDA BE DOWN THERE WITH SOREY, WHICH WAS THE 1000% BETTER CONNECTION TO THE BERSERIA PLOT!????

11:22: I don’t think he hears you, sweetie

11:49: Are you gonna give me nothing but scenery porn for the remaining 10 minutes!?

12:55: Oh no, you didn’t fucking make the last in the line to the throne –

12:57: OH MY GOD NO YOU DID

13:05: That dress is disappointingly boring

14:57: What the fuck is written on that stone?

15:07: How many shepherds has Anime!Lailah destroyed?

15:25: …so, did they kill Eizen?

16:00: ZAVEID, YOU’RE EXCLUSIVELY HANGING OUT WITH OTHER SERAPHIM, AND YOU TRIED TO KILL SOREY THREE TIMES IN A ROW, HOW ARE YOU AN EXAMPLE OF INTERCULTURAL MEDIATION Oh wait actually Anime!Zaveid has never tried to kill Sorey. Well, anyway.

16:03: …Yeah, Eizen is what? Apart from, STILL A DRAGON AND MORE IMPORTANTLY, STILL CURSED!?

16:25: Ride a dragon, Edna

16:40: …It was too much to ask, I guess. Dammit.

16:57: Oh hello long-haired Rose. How did it get that long, she doesn’t even look a single day older

AND WHERE IS YOUR SHEPHERD’S CLOAK, BITCH!?

You also look like a Pokémon trainer. Or like a female Luke. Definitely female Luke

17:43: Lesbians doing a cooking course together. How does that fit your schedule, QUEEN ALISHA?

18:02: HAROLD, THEY’RE LESBIANS

19:07: PURPLE PROSE AU IS REAL

19:55: They are so fucking married I can’t believe my eyes

20:18: Well… about that…

20:20: YEAH ASK MEEBO, EXCEPT SOMEBODY DECIDED TO CUT THAT PART OF PLOT AND WORLDBUILDING COMPLETELY OUT OF THE STORY

20:32: *CHOKED SCREAMING*

Btw is there a specific reason why the nameless kids look like Sorey’s and Mikleo’s human love children? Except hurting me on a deep emotional level?

20:41: THAT’S AN UNDERSTATEMENT AND YOU KNOW THAT, TSUNLEO

21:18: Hey wait, they can still do the telepathy crap? Why? And how is the pact still in place?

21:23: ARRRRHHHHHH WHY DO YOU BREAK MY HEART, ALL I WANTED WAS SERAPH SOREY

21:40: R3V#1GU) +B8ß23pkcf +ierq0ßcple2ßîdo^# jncoäejvcreoL *AGGRESSIVELY SMASHES KEYBOARD*

21:52: …Dammit. *adapts “adult Meebo is still shorter than Sorey” headcanon to “adult Meebo is the same height as Sorey until he starts growing too, until they arrive at the same height difference again* Then again, this is a stupid canon divergent AU, anyway, right?

21:58: FOR FUCKING REAL!?

22:05: Good idea, ask Gramps for all the missing things from the plot. The adaptation spared him, after all

22:15: Part of me is relieved, part of me is very upset

22:43: Why can you still do this? BTW WAY TO CHEAT ON A RACE

23:00: When did you two learn to fly?

AND WHERE THE FUCK IS MAOTELUS? WHO CARES ABOUT HELDALF, WHO SHOULD BE FUCKING DEAD? I WANT MY SWEET BABY BACK

23:06: What… or where is that?

23:17: THAT’S FRIGGIN’ NORMAL BIRDS, SOREY

And did you just fly out of Glenwood to Tethe’alla, because I don’t recognize that view

WHAT A RIDE

Hands still shaky, still sick, fucking offended

PLEASE END MY LIFE

(no reaction scribbles this time, at least not immediately. Except Sorey and Mikleo should totally adopt their mini selves. AND LAPHI.)

#spoilers #Tales of Zestiria spoilers #Tales of Zestiria the X spoilers #Tales of Zestiria #Tales of Zestiria the X #Tales of Berseria spoilers

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clockworksampi · 7 years

Text

‘Squeeze’ Commentary

Longer works always present a problem for me, which is why I so seldom write them. They exist in a separate formula entirely from the academic technicalities of one-shots, and it’s a formula I have zero insight on how to balance. Therefore, I took a lot of time and asked more people than usual to pre-read this to make sure I perform to the extent of my abilities. Theme and pacing are the two things I’m the worst at. The only thing I ever set out to do is write some gags and make some people laugh. Every time I consciously attempt to write something with a theme, it just looks preachy. Whenever I attempt pacing, it all seems slow and uninteresting. And I don’t know if the characters I write can sustain attention for longer than ten minutes. I still try, because the art of storytelling is one that is truly wonderful when done correctly. Even if I’m a long way off from doing that. I don’t want to be the pontifical asshat edifying the blithering masses because I’m so much worldlier than everyone else on this ball of mud floating in space (which is aggressively untrue), but theme and revelation are vital aspects of storytelling. Every story, even Touhou fan-fiction, needs emotional and intellectual engagement to be great. I tried to make the theme a pretty simple and transparent one. In the immortal words of the venerable Mitch Hedberg: “I’m not a fuckin’ genius for christsakes, y’know, fuckin’, just tryin’ to tell some jokes. Shit! Who the fuck are you!?” I try to live my life by that shining ethos.

The ending fight scene with Mokou and Flandre was originally very, very different, in the sense that it didn’t exist and involved pocket dimension snowmen. It was changed several times to arrive at what it currently is. Not even joking. You can figure out for yourselves how the narrative arrived at that. I’m not sure myself. A shame, considering the original draft was rather well-written; too bad it made absolutely no sense whatsoever.

Fun Fact: Remilia calls Yorihime ‘Yo-yohime’ because I, me the writer, actually forgot what Yorihime’s name was.

This work marks the first thing I’ve done where characters are actually in a relationship. I usually don’t like shipping, for the sole reason that very little of ships across the Internet are predicated upon the canon of the primary source. Although I will admit I am not without my predilections, hence why Hecatia and Junko are implied to have crushes on each other in Judgement Call. As far as I’m concerned, the only pairing in the Touhou Project that could be construed as canon is Miko and Tojiko, as they are based on two real life people who were real life married. Mokou and Keine are a thing in this because Mokou having a strong relationship with a human (well, sorta human) is an important motivation point. I pray you can forgive me for shipping.

Of course, here am I acting all high and mighty about canon with all the liberties I took with the characters’ powers. If there’s one thing I learned from super hero comics, bending the rules and giving people power they should not have either goes over mediocre, or disastrous with little middle ground. Since progression and iteration, and the benefits and dangers that go along with them were some of the major themes of the story, I felt compelled to give the characters a little more. I did try to connect the more outlandish of things to official sources, or give them what I thought to be appropriate buildup. These things need to be sold, and I hope I sold them well enough. But maybe I’m wrong on that, and I will capitulate fully to anyone disagrees. I know Touhou canon is held extremely sacredly in fan works.

That was sarcasm, but this is one thing I do want feedback on. Let’s get into some of the more interesting choices I made for the characters.

Can Flandre destroy abstract concepts? Probably not, but I went with ‘she can, but hasn’t figured out how.’ And I’m pretty sure I misinterpreted how the whole ‘Eye’ thing works. I did make Eyes of abstract concepts fundamentally different than Eyes of physical things, because they are different, and they should be different to destroy.

I agonized over giving Remilia a resistance to rain, but I hope I sold it well enough. She has shown several times in canon that she has an aversion to it, as a vampire should, and is something cataclysmic to Flandre in the work. By all accounts, this resistance should not exist, and I will admit that. However, Remilia has also shown that she has been building up a tolerance to sunlight and claims that her body is not weak. I don’t think it’s so far-fetched to assume that she is not entirely powerless to water.

Remilia Scarlet is my favorite character, hands down, in all of Touhou. I therefore had to make doubly sure she was not given much in the way of favor. Which was a little difficult because in this work she played a puppet master, exposition style character who set up the plot of the story and, as a result, knew everything that was going to happen because of her broken-tier power. She seemed built for the role. I really don’t think I succeeded in pulling her out of the spotlight as much as I wished. Lessons for next time. I based her part largely on Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully and Lord Vetinari from the Discworld series, as the one who commands sensibility with an iron first, can be bullheaded at times and embodies the central theme of whatever story, with Sakuya being the Ponder. I’ll be honest, I don’t think I pulled the archetype off as well as the late Sir Pratchett. Here, I would probably make a joke about how his legacy living on in a fan-fiction of a bullet hell video game with an entire cast of little girls is exactly how Sir Pratchett would have wanted it, but I respect the man too much to sully his name like that.

I think Keine got the short end of the characterization stick. She really doesn’t feel like much of a character me, more than she is a vessel to push the plot forward and exist. She’s somewhat stiff. She has a few jokes, but they’re few and far between. I don’t think I did a good job with Keine.

I am likewise unsatisfied with how I portrayed Sakuya. She comes off as a little too serious, I think. But at the same time, she was understandably frustrated with serving Cirno.

Speaking of Sakuya, I’ve always been a fan of the theory that she started as a vampire hunter who Remilia defeated. It strikes me as a very Remilia thing to hire the people who tried to kill you because it makes your life interesting. Have you ever noticed how Remilia’s two greatest defenders command silver knives and the rain? Makes me wonder if Meiling didn’t try to take a crack at Remilia back in the day.

Also speaking of fan theories, I rather like the idea of Mokou smoking (don’t smoke, kids, it’ll kill you). But I even more like the idea of hand-rolled cigarette over ones from the pack; rolling your own just has a certain class to it I can’t help but admire.

Why can Meiling make rain? Isn’t her ability controlling qi? Yes, it is. However, she is also (according to the interpretation I chose for her) a rainbow dragon. Rainbow dragons can probably control the rain, right? Flandre has the ability to destroy anything, but she is still a vampire, with all the strengths and weaknesses that comes with. Besides, don’t Meiling’s danmaku patterns revolve around plants, rainbows or rain? It seemed like a logical thing.

I don’t know what Cirno’s accent is. This is why it changes every ten seconds.

There are five things I specifically want critiques on: Did I go too far with artistic liberties? How was the pacing? How was the theming? Were the characters interesting throughout? What was your favorite pun? My favorite pun? Definitely a toss-up between vampires not being predisposed to reflection and Mokou solving the Incident before it got into later stages. Equivoques galore! I especially like the second one because it’s very Touhou specific. Which one was your favorite?

Also my first time doing a multi-chaptered thing. Hopefully I got the formatting down on the first go.

#fan fiction #commentary #touhou

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