Tumgik
#yeah im 5 feet tall . tragic
sunsodas · 3 years
Photo
Tumblr media
drew myself into blue period !! (im the one on the right :D)
102 notes · View notes
Text
Rules: Tag the person who tagged you, answer the questions and tag 20 people ! i was tagged by @nevergenders thanks my dude
1. How tall are you? 5 feet and a half inch
2. What color and style is your hair? brown with sorta side bangs and curly and messy as hell
3. What color are your eyes? blue
4. Do you wear glasses? nah
5. Do you wear braces? nope
6. What is your fashion style? fake goth gf/depressed sweater witch/hipster trash
7. Full name? i try not to post it online oof
8. When were you born? march 17
9. Where are you from and where do you live now? born in the north east coast and now im trapped in the south
10. What school do you go to? i don’t oof
11. What kind of student are you? not one
12. Do you like school? fuck no
13. What are your favourite school subjects? art and some history
14. Favorite TV shows? criminal minds, the office, end of the fucking world
16. Favorite books? harry potter, a series of unfortunate events, coraline
17. Favourite past-time? ??? uhhh watching tv and cosplay i guess???  
18. Do you have any regrets? So Many
19. Dream job? i have no idea anymore
20. Would you like to get married? i used to think i would but now idk i dont rlly think anyone will like me that much and even if someone did it seems kinda expensive and pointless
21. Would you like to have kids someday?  probably not and definitely not biologically
22. How many? ??
23. Do you like shopping? yea but then i hate that i spent money
24. What countries have you visited? i went on a cruise and ive been to saint martin and the bahamas
25. What’s the scariest nightmare you’ve ever had? i have nightmares almost every night and remember a lot of them so they dont really stick out anymore
26. Do you have any enemies? yeah
27. Do you have a s/o? tragically no
28. Do you believe in miracles? not really anymore
also 15 is missing and that is distressing
i guess ill tag @kideys , @strangest-storm and @vaumpire
2 notes · View notes
marsawaitz-blog · 6 years
Text
HEART BREAK EPISODES (Intro/Childhood heartbreaks)
There’s many times in life our heart breaks, sometimes it’s disappointments in ourselves, our failures and some are relationships. I can’t honestly remember the very first time my heart broke. Was it the time my first valentine declined my card (ill talk about him later)? Or maybe the first time I moved as a kid? I can’t remember. Even though they all had an impact on me and all hurt one way or another it isn’t clear which so instead i figured I write journal entries on my first experiences of different kinds of heartbreaks. So here it goes.
CHILDHOOD HEARTBREAKS
“I honestly wish I was a kid again”, “kids have it great”, “what could be your biggest worry as a kid?” are all phrases you hear everyday. I don’t get it though what’s so great about being a kid? Do people really have pain-free childhoods? I’m only 18, i guess technically i’m a kid too but not for long. I’ve honestly never found the point of being a kid again, i’m so glad I don’t have to go back. Besides the obvious 13yr old tragic memories, even as a kid life wasn’t easy. Sure I didn’t have to pay bills ( Rather work and pay then to deal with Society sometimes), I mean maybe back to when I was 3 or 5 since I don’t remember those memories, but I remember being 10 as if it was yesterday. I was a small, didn’t even grow tall yet. I was so young, how could I have already experienced heartbreak? Well it doesn’t take much heart or years to be honest. As soon as puberty starts hitting like the plague, it’s like all innocence is ripped away, the filter that keeps our small minds so clean is starting to fade. Everyone around me was getting taller, more grown, some even already had deeper voices, and then there was me. 10 year old girl with messy ponytail in the gap shirts. I wasn’t growing tall, I wasn’t getting my period like some people, nor did I start wearing small Bras girls wore. Heck some girls were even wearing mascara and lipstick already! I’ll tell you what I did get, hairier, yeah go ahead laugh now it’s funny now but it wasn’t then. I was already an easy target for being chubby and messy haired. I was beginning to grow hair on my arms a lot and my legs. I felt so ew but my mom swore it was normal and that it’s okay. I didn’t see it as so wrong either but I guess for others it was abnormal. I always wore pants and jackets to school to hide how chubby I was, but one day my mom  got sick of my outfits and demanded I go to school in shorts and a short sleeve shirt. “It’s too hot outside for you to look like that.” Even mad uncomfortable i still went to school, anything to make my mom happy. Little would I knew this would be the day I learned how cruel the world gets. As soon as people saw me the whispered to each other. My first day in this new elementary was not so great (oh I didn’t mention this was my first time in Eagle Nest Elementary). I was introduced to the class and took a seat in the back. I wasn’t pessimistic naturally before. I sat next to a girl I said Hi and she raised her eyebrows and looked away. It’s lunch time and I had made no friends, regardless all the times I said Hi to people just to receive giggles or be ignored. Recess came and I sat at the swing by myself. No one wanted to be my friend....but why? was I really that hard to want to get to know? What was wrong with me? Someone has to want to be my friend right? A little girl finally approached me she sat next to me on the swing i smiled at her no matter how hard it was to act like I wasn’t a little sad. She looked at me and then back at some little girls standing a few feet away giggling. She was trying not to laugh and she asked me if i knew what a razor was, why are my legs so hairy? she bust out laughing and the other girls did too. A little boy just feet away kept laughing saying my dad was probably chewbacca. I tried to laugh with them maybe this was just a harsh joke. “we’re laughing at you not with you dummy” he said. I tried to act like I didn’t care but I remember my heart dropping. Why were they  so cruel to me?.. I never had really noticed my legs like that nor my arms. I thought i was normal. In class people started to whisper jokes, pass notes some even drew me pics of a chewbacca looking creature and left them on my desk. It was everywhere and everyone knew. I wore pants the next day but it only got worse. I had never seen myself like that. I know i didn’t have princess perfect hair but I didn’t see myself as so ugly. School was becoming torture to attend. I remember I began crying in the bathroom during lunch instead of facing the kids teasing in the cafeteria. I had for the first time learned to hate myself, to hate other kids. I begged my mom to let me shave but she said not till im 13. I wore pants but nothing satisfied them. I was forever labelled as an outcast. It’s crazy how so young I began to un-love myself. My parents had always told me im beautiful, or taught me to love and now I was losing it. I remember sitting in that damn bathroom stall trying to be as silent as could crying. God forbid someone heard me. I was shaking standing on top of the toilet seat waiting for the bell that meant I had survived halfway through this shitty place. I was literally that girl you see in movies that you pity. That shit u see on screens really does happen. Here I was first hand experiencing it. My heart was breaking every day a little more with everyone’s word, but the most painful thing was knowing I believed them...I learned to not love even the small things about me because of someone else. I loved learning but now hated school. I couldn’t even ask my parents for help or they’d just say ignore it...this was the beginning to not just not liking myself but also to realizing the world wasn’t as kind as I thought, and I didn’t think I was going to not love life anymore. But this was the beginning also the beginning to the hatred in my heart that caused my depression, that later would come to much worse side effects.
1 note · View note
6-v-6 · 7 years
Note
1-100. Just give it to me all
ALNLSNGLSG ARE YOU SERIOUS OMFG im so sorry this is going to be Long
1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? I’ll say Pandora just because it’s the only one I’ve actually ever used. If I used Spotify I’d probably like it the most but I don’t use those apps so
2. is your room messy or clean?VERY VERY MESSY I need to clean it but im lazy
3. what color are your eyes?Brown!
4. do you like your name? why?My birth name? No. And that’s why I changed it ahahahaha yes I like the name Jae since i chose it myself. It’s short and simple
5. what is your relationship status?Single 
6. describe your personality in 3 words or lessContradictory ....... Situational 
7. what color hair do you have?Currently it’s blue c: Natural color is a lightish brown
8. what kind of car do you drive? color?I don’t have a car nor a license :/ I want a motorbike tho ! a black one
9. where do you shop?I shop pretty much exclusively online. Buyma or Amazon, typically
10. how would you describe your style?I’ve been told that I dress like a “bad boy”. I like leather and black and ripped skinny jeans but I do like casual stuff too. Like hoodies and sweats
11. favorite social media accountIf this is talking about my own social media accounts, then this one right here on tumblr. I’m not very active anywhere else
12. what size bed do you have?uuuuhhhh I don’t know proper terminology but it is small
13. any siblings?Yup! I have an older sister and a younger brother
14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?Japan probably? It’s super pretty and I’ve always wanted to visit
15. favorite snapchat filter?hmm I don’t use snapchat that much but probably the flower crown one it’s cute
16. favorite makeup brand(s)I don’t wear makeup tbh so i dunnooooo 
17. how many times a week do you shower?7 I don’t ever skip showering 
18. favorite tv show?Psych? I also like the 100 currently
19. shoe size?asglnasg... god .... im a 6 in mens nd like a 7 in womens i have small feet
20. how tall are you?ALNSLGNSG im trusting no one has read this far so it’s okay to disclose this info...exposin myself.. im 5′2″ ............
21. sandals or sneakers?Sneakers !! I don’t wear sandals like ever
22. do you go to the gym?Yes! Only recently, actually! I just bought a gym membership with my friend and we’ve been going 3 times a week c:
23. describe your dream dateoh geez I havent really thought about this? I’m not very romantic or anything (im on the ace spectrum) but... i dunno. I think it’d be nice to just have fun together. An amusement park maybe? And just a lot of hand holding and smiles
24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?Upwards of 100 bcuz my mom keeps giving me money even tho i dont use it
25. what color socks are you wearing?HAH im not wearing any 
26. how many pillows do you sleep with?1-2 it depends on the night
27. do you have a job? what do you do?I work at the cafeteria in my school. I run the register and help to stock items and also serve food to people
28. how many friends do you have?wow this is a Tragic question. Online I have quite a few! In person i literally have....... 2. Barely that lol. More like one
29. whats the worst thing you have ever done?Killed my sister’s fish (on accident)
30. whats your favorite candle scent?I’ve never thought about this or really smelled many candles to begin with :( something mild though. Maybe a mild vanilla??
31. 3 favorite boy namesuuhghg 1) Cain 2) Luka 3) Eden
32. 3 favorite girl names1) Erin 2) Rayna 3) Kira
33. favorite actor?I rly dont give a crap about actors if I’m being honest lmao. Uhh choi minho :)
34. favorite actress?Lupita Nyong’o?? she’s gorgeous
35. who is your celebrity crush?I don’t have a crush on him but does Lee Taemin count
36. favorite movie?Princess Mononoke
37. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?I read ff more than books these days. I don’t have a fav book
38. money or brains?is this what I prefer? Money binch if I had money I wouldn’t need brains also I’m dumb anyways 
39. do you have a nickname? what is it?No I do not
40. how many times have you been to the hospital?Twice? Maybe 3 times
41. top 10 favorite songscheck out shinee’s entire discography 
42. do you take any medications daily?Nope
43. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)i ?? have no idea?? I guess oily? My skin doesn’t get dry so
44. what is your biggest fear?Probably flying. I hate planes
45. how many kids do you want?Exactly none
46. whats your go to hair style?? uh side-swept? I have no idea what to call it just what my hair normally looks like I guess
47. what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)A moderately sized house
48. who is your role model?Not to be cheesy but Lee Taemin also Kim Kibum also Choi Minho also Kim Jonghyun also Lee Jinki
49. what was the last compliment you received?that I’m great? lol
50. what was the last text you sent?’okay’ to my mom lmao
51. how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?ARE YOU TELLING ME SANTA ISNT REAL??? okay but for real who remembers the age they find out omg .. i was Young so idk maybe like 13
52. what is your dream car?ohhh boy a lambo for sure
53. opinion on smoking?Gross. Smells terrible
54. do you go to college?I do indeed. I’m gonna be a senior ya’ll
55. what is your dream job?To be a writer I guess. I don’t really have a dream job
56. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?Suburbs? I dunno. I like living in the city I’d probably die of boredom in some rural area
57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?hell yea binch
58. do you have freckles?nope!
59. do you smile for pictures?Not for selfies but for other pictures yes I feel like it’s weird or rude not to
60. how many pictures do you have on your phone?like 300 something
61. have you ever peed in the woods?what the fuck?? lol?? no??
62. do you still watch cartoons?does voltron count :/
63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?neither if I’m being honest but Wendy’s I guess. I never ever eat at mcdonalds
64. Favorite dipping sauce?barbeque sauce?
65. what do you wear to bed?An oversized shirt and boxers lol
66. have you ever won a spelling bee?no i cant say I have
67. what are your hobbies?Writing, sometimes. Playing video games. Bein unhealthy
68. can you draw?Naaaah
69. do you play an instrument?No :( I wish I did but I never learned any
70. what was the last concert you saw?SHINEE WORLD V IN LA!!!!!!!!! BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!
71. tea or coffee?Coffee bcuz i h8 tea
72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?Well the coffee at dunkin donuts is worlds better so dunkin donuts
73. do you want to get married?no
74. what is your crush’s first and last initial?i dont have a crush
75. are you going to change your last name when you get married?’when’ lol i dont plan to get married
76. what color looks best on you?black, in my opinion
77. do you miss anyone right now?no not really
78. do you sleep with your door open or closed?open because if it’s closed my cat will scratch on it incessantly until she’s let in
79. do you believe in ghosts?hell yeah dude
80. what is your biggest pet peeve?when people like, dance around a subject. I prefer it when people are straightforward. Especially if they want something from me
81. last person you called`Honest to god I can’t remember. I don’t ever call people lmao so probably my mom
82. favorite ice cream flavor?I like Rocky Road a lot!
83. regular oreos or golden oreos?regular. Golden oreos are a lesser creation
84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?RAINBOW. GIMME DAT GAY SHIT
85. what shirt are you wearing?It’s just a plain white t-shirt
86. what is your phone background?ot5
87. are you outgoing or shy?Horribly, annoyingly shy although I can mask it pretty well
88. do you like it when people play with your hair?yes :D
89. do you like your neighbors?lmao I don’t know them?? They arent noisy though so yes I like them since they aren’t annoying or anything
90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?Both. I take a shower in the morning and wash it then. And then do a skincare routine at night
91. have you ever been high?no.... not that I know of. One time I took nyquil though and it Fucked Me Up i felt high but idk if I was or if that’s even possible
92. have you ever been drunk?nope. I’m not a huge fan of the idea of getting drunk. I don’t like letting my guard down like that so if I ever do it’ll be when I’m alone
93. last thing you ate?a mento 
94. favorite lyrics right nowthe entire lyrics to So Far Away by yoongi
95. summer or winter?WINTER. I hate summer fashion i like being able to wear my jackets and jeans and not Die of heat stroke
96. day or night?night I guess just bcuz I can be alone
97. dark, milk, or white chocolate?dark chocolate is superior in every way
98. favorite month?uhm.. December? Because its the end of the year and I’m on break then and Christmas and cold weather and hot chocolate
99. what is your zodiac signI’m a virgo 
100. who was the last person you cried in front of?uhhhHHHH I really make it a Goal to never cry in front of people since im just super uncomfortable with that and honestly dont feel comfortable enough around anyone to do that. My sister walked in on me when I was crying once though so her I guess
10 notes · View notes