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demigod-of-the-agni · 6 months

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#LongPost: A Few Hyper-Specific Things About India for India-Based Stories and Art

No this isn't a cry for more Indian-rep in Spider-Verse stories. (It is.)

Anyway. I recently went to India, and after returning to my hometown in Tamil Nadu, I reintegrated a whole slew of memories and collated new facts.. And considering I've been wanting to do one of these for quite some time (and because I need a new variety of Pavitr Prabhakar content), I thought it'd be cool if I shared some of my experiences and ideas with you.

It's best to take this with caution, though: the only places I've been to are Tiruchirappalli, Madurai, and a few towns located close to the Eastern Ghats, so my knowledge is heavily South India-based. I know for a fact that there are various similarities and differences between other geo-cultural areas of India, which is I why I've linked the other cool India Resources here as well.

In Which I Ramble About Pavitr's Character Design and the Indian Cultural Stuff Related to It by @chaos-and-sparkles (+ my addition + @neptune432's addition)

A culture post for the girlie pops (and non-girlie pops) looking to write Pavitr Prabhakar accurately by @summer-blues-stuff (+ my addition + @fandomsfeminismandme addition)

Also a timely reminder of @writingwithcolor's wonderful resources on writing about South Asian characters respectfully and sincerely

Now, for the things I've noticed in South India..

ANIMALS

There are a lot of street dogs. Like... a lot of them. And honestly it's so hard not to go up to one and give them a snack or two. The most notable dog breed is the Indian pariah and they can be found all over India. Mixed dog breeds are also common and results in a variety of features like differences in build and coat colours.

There are also other types of animals are pretty common to see alongside the roads.

Cattle are seen a lot (cows and bulls are easy to distinguish; cows (left) have udders and a small hump on their back, while bulls (right) are generally stockier and have a super-defined hump on their back). I'm pretty sure the specific cow breed is the sahiwal cow. They are either herded into paddocks for grazing or can be found wandering city streets on their own.

Goats are often herded by farmers into large masses of wool and horns and are guided to paddocks to graze. Sometimes, like cattle, they'll be found wandering city streets on their own.

Chickens are usually kept close to stalls and homes. These chickens are not plump and fluffy like most Western chickens, but are quite skinny. Mottled feather colours are usually a result of mixed chicken breeds. In Tamil Nadu, the most common chicken breed is the asil chicken.

Various birds are often seen flying around traffic if they’re not disappearing into the sky, the most common being crows, pigeons and mynahs. (The chart below on the right is not an inexhaustive list of birds; you best search them up yourself.)

TRANSPORT

There is obviously a huge amount of trucks and lorries and buses. They all have beautiful designs or crazy LEDs or large detailed fluorescent / iridescent stickers that are impossible to ignore, whether it be at high noon or midnight.

Expanding on that, the most common method of transport are motorcyclse or scooties, cars, and autos.

Also, as expected: traffic is insane. It’s horrible. It’s exhilarating. Western honking is akin to swearing, but here? Honk whenever you want. Honk if you’re happy or if you’re sad. You get a million dollars if you honk. You need to honk. It’s more important than breathing

Similarly, road rules don’t exist. Well, they do, and the Indian government does everything it can to make sure people do follow the rules, but based on the aforementioned honking, most people don't. Everyone just drives. Most bikers and motorcyclists don’t wear helmets. Only a few people wear seatbelts. Cars and motorcycles drive on the wrong side of the road and right into oncoming traffic. The chance of someone dying is 99% but it’s countered by desi stubbornness.

ENVIRONMENT & INFRASTRUCTURE

Houses and buildings are painted different colours!!! Pastel pinks and purples and deep teal hues, either plain colours or decorated with elaborate murals. This also applies to interiors. I reckon it was surprising to a lot of people when they were confronted with Mumbattan's vibrant colours, but honestly: coloured buildings slap, and it's based on the real thing. They are a sight to behold. Couple that with the architecture and oh boy- you've got such a beautiful environment.

From @jettpack's concept art for Mumbattan buildings

jettpack's concept art of the Mumbattan collider

From @chenfelicia's concept and colour keys of Mumbattan

Don't be shy to really immerse in crazy descriptors - that's how you capture the liveliness of cities like Madurai and Mumbai and ultimately, their physical manifestations like Mumbattan.

Funny enough, movie posters and political banners and flyers are EVERYWHERE. They’re huge and take up entire billboards, or congregate along walls so it becomes practically a collage. It's impossible to ignore the image of "Makkal Selvan" Vijay Sethupathi about to beat some poor loser into a pulp with a stick, or the political parties roasting each other on paper with impressive photoshopped graphics.

To tie in to the point about transport: there are hundreds of coffee stalls and snack shops and one-of-a-kind food stands. You can’t go 200 metres without running into one, either on the highway or in the city. I remember having jaggery coffee on my first night in India, and guys- it tasted so fucking good. I only wish I can transfer the taste to you. Absolutely splendid.

The climate in India is generally very humid and warm, but that doesn't mean we don't get cooler days; it is obviously cooler on winter nights. Also I've heard from many conflicting sources on India's seasonal weather (probably due to India's geograpghy), so you will have to talk to someone who is from India to really confirm. I've somewhat boiled it down to five seasons:

Summer - May-Jun; very hot (35-45ºC/95-113ºF), characterised by shrinking water bodies and droughts if there aren't any rainfalls; this time is good for plant growth/harvest if you've successfully managed water supplies

Monsoon - Jul-Aug; (34ºC/93ºF) very variable in terms of timing, characterised by torrential rains and floodings; the raining itself probably lodges somewhere in Jun-Sept but the aftereffects are felt long after the rains have stopped

Autumn - Sept-Nov; cooler but humid (25-35ºC/77-95ºF), and generally much drier since it transitions from autumn to winter

Winter - Dec-Feb; much colder, but the extent is dependent on geographic regions (20-25ºC/68-77ºF)

Spring - Mar-Apr; humid (33ºC/91ºF), sudden downpours, only occasionally do you get pleasant weather in this time

PEOPLE AND CULTURE

For some reason, there are still loud speakers blaring out music across the roads and as far as a few city blocks. I honestly thought that that had died out by the time my parents had graduated university, but it still seems like people like hearing music played at 120 decibels.

This is a complicated issue but people are not piss poor. Yes, India is a developing country, and yes there are slums and there are homeless and there are those who are stuck in a horrific sociocultural cycle, but people are rapidly getting into high-paying jobs at much higher rates than before. Overall, India is getting better; do us a favour and not have us be represented by the same poor struggle-riddled Indian stories that Hollywood and Western media is are fond of portraying.

@neptune432: One thing I think it's important to acknowledge though is how your experience in India changes depending on your caste. I feel like most of the indian voices talking online are savarna (I'm not an exception) so this doesn't get brought up as much. It's a complicated issue and one that I don't think non-indians (or savarna indians) should worry about tackling in their work, but it's worth saying because what's assumed to be everyday aspects of indian culture are actually specific to things like caste, class, and what region you're in. ex: in kerala, there are also examples of people eating on banana leaf with lots of vegan food for special occasions (namely during onam). but veganism is heavily tied to brahmanism so most of these people will be savarna. even if they eat meat otherwise, the specific interest in eating vegan for special occassions has clear implications. Though many people of different castes eat meat, it's a practice that gets discriminated against, being treated as barbaric and unclean. this is because of brahmanism and is usually only strictly followed by brahmins. dalits/bahujan usually face the worse treatment for their eating traditions. there's also the fact that hinduism is more of a recent term and a broad umbrella where many different gods and cultures have been put under (and usually done forcefully). a lot of local dieties and specific cultural practices come from outside the vedic traditions of aryans (upper caste north india), but now are treated almost as one thing. ex: kali is a south indian (dravidian) goddess who's still heavily worshipped there and who later got adapted to brahminical traditions. that's also why south indian practices of worship are different from the north and are discriminated against ex: north indians getting angry at the idea of worshipping kali by drinking alcohol and smoking even though it's an older tradition than theirs. these traditions are often connected to dalit/tribal cultures as well, which adds to why these traditions are attacked. Now, I don't feel comfortable with non-indians writing about india in general but I feel it's important to mention these things cos most people don't even realize they're only getting shown certain perspectives. How many people don't even know they're a north/south divide, for example? People are fed narrow viewpoints on India and assume that's everything to know. it's a problem cos that's what the brahminical forces in india want. This is all very general info too and I'm no expert so it's worth more research (like reading what dalits have said on their experiences). I'm not trying to criticize you btw, I just wanted to add some things cos this has been on my mind for a long time now. Couldn't have said it better myself, neptune!! (I barely mentioned it at all lmao) The caste system despite it being "abolished" still defines many traditions within India, and almost always in harmful ways. Like @summer-blues-stuff and I have mentioned in their post A culture post for the girlie pops under the Religion and caste section, it's best to leave the caste and social hierarchy alone even if you've done your research. That doesn't mean you shouldn't talk about it, it's just that people, especially those of non-South Asian decent, have to be extremely careful about it. Introductory resources on the caste system can be found on ABC, Pew Research and The Conversation.

Furthermore, the automatic assumption is that people living in shacks or remote villages have no access to greater populations and resources, which I'm happy to completely disprove. Guys: majority of the people living in my village, a rather remote village, have phones on them. Ranges from iPhones to Androids to good ol' Nokias.

(And, side note: as an Indian, I get amazingly pissed off when people's ringtones are set to maximum volume and play the same famous part of a famous song every time they get a call. Like shut the fuck up. At least quieten down? Please??)

(Also this might be a South Indian thing but Man some people are so entitled. Dudes you do not need to rub your ego into my face. Dudes you can, you know, keep all the cool things you think will get other people jealous out of the public eye. At this point I'm not jealous of what you Have, I'm pissed off at the Audacity To Think You Can Make Me Feel Bad About Myself With The Things That You Have).

Alright. Moving on.

Tiny temples and shrines are everywhere, dedicated to broad-Hinduism deities like Ganesh, Shakthi, or Vishnu; other times, they are shrines built for local deities that protect a particular village. For example, my village dedicated a little plot of water-logged land to a benevolent spirit called Subbamma, where people would leave offerings or place their sick/injured animals at the water's edge so that Subbamma could heal them. These tiny temples are almost always super colourful and amazingly detailed despite their small size

It could be a whole month before a celebration like Diwali but it’s the perfect time to set off hundreds of fireworks and firecrackers. People are just inconsiderate in many ways, it seems.

Some women wear strings of jasmine flowers in their hair. This might be completely regional-based, but most if not all women, ranging from little kids to old ladies, will wear these strings of jasmine in their hair. It's supposed to represent good fortune and beauty, and it smells wonderful.

@esrev-redips: #i usually only visit the north side of india (went to banglore and or chennai once) but im pretty sure most women in mumbai wouldnt wear #flowers in their hair unless they were of an older generation #they dont in new delhi at least and i t h i n k you can compare them but im not sure since i dont live in india either Thank you esrev!!!!! glad to see an old hunch be confirmed!!!

Normally you can wear any type of jasmine, but the common subtypes in Tamil Nadu are ஜாதிமல்லி (jathimalli; "Spanish jasmine"; left) and மல்லிப்பூ (mallipoo; right).

Eating food from a plate made from a banana leaf is more than just an aesthetic, and is often reserved for certain occasions; other times we eat from metal or ceramic plates. I can't vouch for other areas of India but I've been told the reason why banana leaves are predominantly used for large gatherings is because they can signal to diners if the food is rotten or has been poisoned; supposedly the leaf itself starts rotting and releases liquid, but I personally have never seen this happen. But of course, there are also other reasons as to why banana leaves are used (all of which are valid) ranging from being an eco-friendly disposable plate, offloading nutrients into food, or even to make the food taste better. Pick whichever reason you like.

I'm literally so hungry looking at this. (Realises this is a Pavitr thing to say.) Anyway.

FOOD RECS!!!!!!

Reblog with your favourite foods >:) The list will be routinely updated...

JAGGERY COFFEE (from me) - GOOD FUCKING STUFF. ACTUALLY. if you see it.. GET IT IMMEDIATELY

PANI PURI (from @esrev-redips) - #also you forgot to mention the PANI PURI STANDS AHHHHHH YUMYUMYUM | RRRR YOU'RE SO RIGHT. PANI PURI FOR LIFE ACTUALLY.

JASUBEN PIZZA (from @the-witch-forever-lives) - okay this is specific to Ahmedabad | okay but as specific as it may be that sounds and looks delicious??? hello??????

DABELI (from @the-witch-forever-lives) - this too???? also it LOOKS wonderful i need it right now actually

VADA PAV (from @the-witch-forever-lives) - Also Vada pav from Mumbai is so one of a kind | you are absolutely correct. vada pav is truly something magnificent

I think that's about all I can give you right now. This took me a while to type out. Feel free to ask any questions, or if you have anything you would like to add on, like anything I might have glossed over or your favourite desi foods, please do!!! I'll be sure to reblog your addition and update the original post.

The point is that this post can become one of those few other reference posts that artists and writers and other creatives can use if they ever want to make anything related to India, because it's genuinely so cool to see your culture represented so well in popular modern media.

(And in fanfic and fandom. Especially in fanfic and fandom. you have no idea how many times I've gone insane reading a Pavitr-centric fic or reading comments on Pavitr-related posts and it's just outdated ideas and harmful stereotypes and all sorts of sick bullshit, and it's always to the point where I physically have to go outside and bite into a fresh rhizome in order to ground myself. Like damn, people, you need to know things before you start creating)

So uh, I hope this was helpful if not interesting! Happy early Diwali everyone! Knowledge-over-ignorance and all that; hopefully this post does that notion justice!

#pavitr prabhakar #wrote this solely because i wanted more atsv pavitr-centric fics and i need to get that specific immersed-in-india itch scratched #and also because the india i remembered decades ago is definitely not the india i visited last week #wow time flies doesn't it #spider man india #india #writing tips #o wise writer stuff #indian culture #south asian culture #spider man across the spider verse #atsv #across the spider verse #chaipunk #goldenpunk #cultural references #atsv pavitr #agnirambles

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quicksilverster · 1 year

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[😇] crashing ❈ yoon jeonghan

⋆⑅˚₊✎ prompt(s): crashing by illenium, bahari

⋆⑅˚₊✎ genres: a whole lotta fluff, a bit of angst, acquaintances-to-lovers!au, college!au, roommate!au.

⋆⑅˚₊✎ description: Five times Jeonghan crashes at Yejin’s apartment, and the one time she crashes at his.

⋆⑅˚₊✎ warning(s): mentions of alcohol

⋆⑅˚₊✎ pairing(s): yoon jeonghan x kang yejin

⋆⑅˚₊✎ word count: 3.4k words

⋆⑅˚₊✎ a/n: A fic I turned into a short story and into a fic again because I recently got back into SEVENTEEN. This is old, 2021-early 2022 writing, but I’m going to post it anyway because it wasn’t that bad (IMO) + I like this story. (i also apologize for the banner quality cuz it's been literal years since i made one for a kpop dude)

one.

The first time Jeonghan crashed at her place, Yejin was alone in her apartment, working on her essay.

Her roommate Aera wasn’t home; she was at a party or club somewhere, getting drunk and dancing her limbs off. Yejin could practically see her limping the next morning, the product of a crushed foot. She was alone in her room, sipping from a mug of warm tea as she added words in Times New Romans font onto her document. The only source of light in the room made its presence known through the glaring screen in front of her, illuminating her worn face. Melodies from her Spotify window and the clacking noise from her fingers drumming the keys were the only sounds in the room, accompanied by Yejin’s tired breathing. She leaned against the back of her chair with exhaustion, her brain fried like a skillet.

Yejin was jolted out of her reverie when the sharp rapping of knuckles against her front door resonated into her ears. Aera usually arrived home after 2 a.m. during one of these crazy social events, meaning the person at the door could not be her. The knocks were rather composed, too, given by one with a sober mind. Begrudgingly peeling her eyes away from the screen, Yejin slid her arctic feet into her fluffy slippers and headed to the front door. Gripping the door handle tightly, she swung it open to meet a familiar face, a smile frozen across his face as a result of the wintry atmosphere outside.

“It’s 11 p.m., why are you still awake?” Jeonghan bustled into the apartment chattering like a mother hen. He scrutinized her fluffy lavender pajamas and wide eyes behind her glinting spectacles. “I understand that you have work and stuff, but sleep is important as well.”

Yejin blinked blankly, watching Jeonghan tut over her apartment with a watchful eye, and dropped an overnight bag on her couch. “Um,” she managed after a few flummoxed seconds. “Uh, what are you doing here?”

“Aera sent me here,” he shrugged, carding his messy locks back. “She wanted me to make sure you’re doing your essay diligently instead of scrolling through Instagram or whatnot.”

“So you’re sleeping over?” Yejin raised a doubtful eyebrow.

Jeonghan scratched the back of his head. “Well, Aera said she might not be back until tomorrow morning, so she wants me to keep you company.”

Aera was currently dating Jeonghan’s best friend and roommate Seungcheol, so she was well acquainted with the young man in front of her. However, that didn’t mean she was entirely comfortable with the idea of him sleeping over in her apartment.

Jeonghan seemed to comprehend Yejin’s indecisive expression, for he placed his hands in the air. “I won’t do anything suspicious, I promise. Aera just doesn’t want you to be alone here.”

“Okay,” Yejin said, slipping her earbud into her ear as she continued her assignment. “Make yourself at home, I guess.”

Jeonghan grinned a broad, boyish smile, before plopping onto the couch and pulling his phone out to play a mobile game. Within a few minutes, he had fallen asleep. His snores accompanied the already existing sounds in the room.

Yejin eyed him from her workstation, her lips punctured as she wondered what her roommate was up to.

two.

“I’m perfectly fine being by myself,” Yejin said with as much patience (which isn’t much) as she could summon from the inner depths of her heart. However, her roommate was making it particularly difficult to be nice.

“I told you a hundred times, you need human interaction!” Aera said as she shoved her feet into a pair of heels, ready for yet another party.

“Easy for you to say, you social butterfly.”

Aera grinned proudly at the nickname she was bestowed with. “Thank you!” She said, bowing for extra effect.

Yejin fought the urge to roll her eyes. “Jeonghan hardly counts as human interaction.” She poked the yogurt cup in her hand with her spoon, denting the fragile base of the plastic. “Whenever he comes here, he only lounges over our couch, steals our snacks, and plays with his phone.”

“It’d be nice if you both become friends.”

“Doesn’t Jeonghan have a girlfriend? Are you sure it’s wise for him to be here?”

Aera fidgeted in the spot, her eyes ricocheting from the door and to her roommate. “If you put it like that, probably not.”

“You just want me to interact with him because he’s your boyfriend’s roommate.”

“And he’s a nice person, and you need his company,” Aera added hurriedly. “Now can I go? I’m going to be late.”

“Fine,” Yejin said. Aera bolted as soon as the words left her roommate’s mouth. Yejin shook her head almost endearingly as the front door slammed shut.

Half an hour later, Jeonghan materialized in her doorway with a messy hairdo and a plastic bag filled with boxes of food. The former was the result of the displeased weather outside, but Yejin couldn’t think of a special occasion that would warrant takeout.

“I heard you have an exam coming up,” Jeonghan placed the plastic bag down in front of her laptop, the smell of it tantalizing Yejin’s stomach to growl. “So I got you this.”

Yejin eyed the plastic bag, her fingers tingling to reach out and devour whatever was inside in a single gulp. She glanced upward and stared into Jeonghan’s eyes. It was difficult to maintain contact; his eyes were obsidian in color, as dark as black holes. If Yejin stared for too long, she’d get sucked in.

“What are you getting out of this?” Yejin asked as politely as she could, though a trained ear could detect the venom hiding within.

Jeonghan leaned in, his disorganized chestnut side-swept hair falling over his eyes. He fixed the navy blue backpack strap hanging from the side of his shoulder as he bent down to stare into her eyes. Yejin held her breath, intimidated by the sudden change of atmosphere.

“Your friendship,” Jeonghan ended cheekily, a boyish smile curling on the corners of his lips.

“Ha,” Yejin muttered weakly, running her hand through her long hair.

“You’re a very smart student, Yejin,” Jeonghan reached out to fidget with her laptop screen, pushing it close before pulling it up again before it could involuntarily shut down. “But it’s okay to take a break sometimes, you know. When you’re done with that assignment of yours, let’s play Monopoly.”

“Monopoly?” Yejin frowned. “We don’t have Monopoly here.”

“I noticed,” Jeonghan commented in a pained tone. “How can you not have a Monopoly board in this apartment? You and Aera are disappointments. Here,” he dropped his backpack on the floor and pulled out a Monopoly board.

Yejin raised a brow. “You brought a whole Monopoly board with you?”

“Yes, for this very special occasion,” Jeonghan said proudly. “Eat your food, and then tell me when you’re finished with your work. I’ll wait for you.”

Despite her protests, Yejin’s heart fluttered a little at his words.

“Okay,” she mumbled.

Jeonghan smiled and threw his body over the couch, unaware that he left a certain girl’s heart hammering violently against her sternum.

three.

A knock dragged Yejin’s attention away from her book and towards the door. Setting the paperback page down on the coffee table, Yejin stretched her sore back as her guest knocked on her door again.

“Coming,” she said, peeking through the eyehole to check. Her eyes widened a little when she recognized the mop of brown hair and swung the door wide open without hesitation. Jeonghan fell forward like a piece of domino, but luckily, Yejin caught his shoulders before he could collide with the ground.

“Get up, you’re heavy,” Yejin inhaled, catching a whiff of alcohol. She coughed, startled. “Oh, crap. Have you been drinking?”

“It was Aera,” he mumbled, his legs flailing behind him. He groaned as his palm flew to his temple. Yejin laid him gently on the couch and rummaged through her drawers for painkillers.

“What were you doing with Aera?” Yejin asked as she placed a glass of water and some tablets on the coffee table. She peered down at Jeonghan’s head from the side of the couch as his body took up the rest of the comfy furniture. From her vantage point, she could see the elegant curves and slopes that made up Jeonghan’s face. He was, indeed, handsome. She threw her gaze away in case he saw her staring, but he was too drunk to care.

“Some party,” Jeonghan said, his voice so soft that Yejin had to guess what he said through his closed lips. He had an arm over his eyes, and his voice sounded strained. Yejin raised an eyebrow.

“Okay,” she pulled at his arm to get him to sit up. “Come on, you need to drink this.”

“I don’t have a headache yet,” his words were slurred as Yejin attempted to yank him to his feet.

“You look like you have a headache. Trust me, Aera’s my roommate.”

“Can I confess something?” Jeonghan swiftly rolled over onto his stomach as he shot Yejin a smile. Or a smirk, more like, judging from the lopsided curve on the right side of his mouth.

“Okay?” Yejin gulped, feeling her cheeks pinking at the casual smile he offered.

“I actually like you,” he laughed, a bubbly note ringing through the silent air of the apartment.

Yejin froze. “What?”

“It was two years ago. I saw you at orientation and developed a crush on you. Surprising, eh? And I only saw you once but I fell deep. In love, I mean. I forgot about you, sort of, when I didn’t see you again for a very long time. And then a few months ago I saw you in the library and learned you were my roommate’s girlfriend’s roommate. You can imagine my shock.”

“Jeonghan, you have a girlfriend,” Yejin reminded him, feeling a stinging in her eye sockets.

“Yeah, I know,” Jeonghan laughed, his eyelids closing halfway through. “Funny. If only I went out more, socialized more, you know. Maybe I would’ve met you. Maybe I would’ve been dating you right now.”

“You sound so confident,” Yejin said, reaching out to press her palm against Jeonghan’s cheek. Just this once. One time, then I’m never going to do this again.

“I mean, maybe. I don’t know,” Jeonghan leaned into her hand and his lips brushed the heel of her palm. Her breath hitched and she swallowed. “Do you like me?”

Yejin grimaced, her lips embracing her teeth. “I don’t know.”

Jeonghan kept his firm gaze on her eyes, but she looked away within seconds. A sigh escaped his mouth and he leaned against the couch.

“Of course, you don’t.” He peeled Yejin’s hand from his cheek. “I’m sorry for coming here.”

“It’s alright,” Yejin said, running her fingers through his hair. “I don’t mind at all.”

“I really like you,” Jeonghan repeated, his voice fading into a soft laugh. “I just…”

A snore left his throat, and a tear escaped her eyelids.

four.

“I want you to be gentle with Jeonghan,” Aera said as she shoved her heels into her shoes.

“What do you mean?” Yejin asked as soon as she pulled the pen from between her teeth. Normally, she’d tuck the piece of stationary behind her ear, but that space was currently occupied by her black-rimmed glasses.

“Something happened,” Aera answered vaguely, averting her gaze from Yejin’s scrutiny.

“To him?”

“You’ll see for yourself.”

When Jeonghan came along, Yejin immediately understood what Aera meant. His fluffy swept hair was even more disgruntled than usual, vaguely reminding Yejin of a thornbush. There were dark circles under his eyes that were almost the shade of his onyx eyes and his lips were chapped and scarlet in some places, but Yejin glanced away before he could catch her staring. Despite how exhausted he looked, he still managed to smile at her.

“I’ve never seen you wear glasses before,” he said.

Yejin tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, swallowing nervously. “Yeah, well, I usually prefer my lenses.”

Jeonghan exhaled, a rough, guttural sound that shattered Yejin’s glass heart into a thousand fragments. “I broke up with Stacey.”

“Oh,” Yejin closed her eyes, squeezing them tightly. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Jeonghan laughed, an empty sound that undulated as he flopped face-first onto the couch. “I’m sorry about last time and for… for being here. I don’t know who else to go to.”

Yejin pursed her lips, wondering if Jeonghan still remembered his confession. Did he remember that he told her he liked her? Did he remember how she placed her palm on his cheek? Did he remember the sound of her heartbeat and the warm emotions thumping in rhythm with her blood?

“Do you want a hug?” she asked, surprising herself.

Jeonghan watched her, a small smile materializing on his face. “Yeah. I’d like that.”

Yejin accompanied Jeonghan on the couch and allowed him to sink his head into the dip of her shoulder. They stayed that way for a while as Yejin allowed Jeonghan to take the warm comfort she offered him.

“I saw her,” he mumbled into the collar of Yejin’s sweater, “with another guy. It’s only been a week since we broke up and there she is. Dating again.”

“Maybe… that’s her way of recovering?” Yejin asked meekly.

“Maybe,” Jeonghan exhaled and Yejin could feel his breath on her neck. “But it still hurts so much, you know.”

“Yeah,” Yejin stared out at the dark sky. “I know.”

“Can I…” Jeonghan shifted to a more comfortable position, keeping his head on Yejin’s shoulder and his arms around her torso. “Can I stay here tonight?”

“Sure.” Yejin pulled away to grab a cushion on the floor and positioned it under Jeonghan’s head. “Not a problem at all.”

Jeonghan looped his fingers through Yejin’s hand, and she didn’t pull away. Instead, she rested her head against the couch and watched his chest rise and fall.

five.

“What’s he doing here?” Aera frowned.

“No, the question is, why are you still here?” Yejin responded.

“I live here!” Aera threw her hands into the air incredulously.

“She’s kicking you out,” Jeonghan snickered. “She wants full ownership of the apartment and the cat and the refrigerator full of your delicious food.”

“We don’t have a cat.”

“He’s the cat,” Yejin jabbed her finger in Jeonghan's direction.

“Ouch,” Jeonghan used his hand that wasn’t occupied with holding a yogurt cup to slam the right side of his chest. “That smarts, Yejin.”

Even the way he said her name made her stomach soar.

“It’s true!” She argued, hoping that her cheeks remained their normal hue. “All you do here is sleep and eat our food. Just like a cat.”

“I meant,” Aera began, flapping the air when Jeonghan opened his mouth to argue, “that I haven’t even left and yet you’re already here. You usually come after I’m gone.”

“We’re having a movie marathon today,” Yejin said. “We’re binging the Larry Hatter movies.”

“Ah, that’s a classic. Have fun, you two.”

“Do you have the popcorn?” Yejin asked as the front door slammed shut.

Jeonghan snorted. “Of course I brought the popcorn. And the candy. What’s a movie marathon without candy?” He grabbed the tubs of popcorn and the colorful plastic bag and plopped onto the couch next to Yejin with a huff.

Larry Hatter and the Thaumaturge’s Rock flashed across the screen in front of them, but Yejin could only focus on the side of Jeonghan’s face. She watched the colors dance over the soft angles of his cheeks, garnering a blush on Yejin’s cheeks. Suddenly, he was watching her, but she didn’t look away.

“Is my face much more interesting than the movie?” Jeonghan laughed, a smirk dancing over his lips. Yejin fought the urge to slap it off his face.

“Why do you like coming over here?” Yejin answered with a question, her head slightly tilted to the side.

Jeonghan paused, watching her as Persephone scolded Roland for pronouncing a spell wrong on screen. Yejin watched the emotions swirl behind his irises, unable to discern any of them.

“Because you’re here,” he said.

Yejin nodded, trying not to smile at the vague answer. “Mhm.”

“Don’t make fun of me.”

“I’m not making fun of you.”

“You’re smiling,” he poked her cheek and Yejin fought the urge to lean into his hand.

Remember, he just got out of a relationship. Don’t do this to him.

“So what, you’ve taken away my right to smile now?” Yejin huffed.

“No,” Jeonghan assured, throwing his head back in a laugh. “It’s just that I can’t control myself when you smile.”

Breathe.

“Okay,” Yejin shrugged. She tightened her grip on her bowl of popcorn and kept a steel gaze on the movie, making sure to ignore Jeonghan’s stares and his hands.

+ one.

One bad thing kept happening after the other.

Earlier that day, someone knocked into Yejin while she was going up the stairs and she fell, scraping her knees against the pavement. They burned like an inferno and Yejin had to bite her lip to prevent herself from crying. The person who shoved her didn’t even spare a second glance her way; she walked home limping. When she arrived home, she checked her phone and discovered that she attained a superbly low grade for one of her essays. She also received a message from one of her friends that his dog ripped apart a book that she lent him. To make matters worse, it was one of her favorite books; a book her mother had given her on her fifteenth birthday.

It was too much for Yejin to handle.

Aera wasn’t home—where was comfort when you needed it—and no one from her family was picking up. Yejin’s face was buried deep into her right palm as another hand pressed her phone against her ear.

Please, Yejin thought as the phone continued to ring in her ear.

“Hello?”

Yejin’s balloon heart sagged in relief.

“Hi,” she swallowed. “Can I come over?”

Jeonghan’s response was immediate. “Yes.”

That was how Yejin found herself in Jeonghan’s apartment, snuggled against him on the couch with a warm mug of hot chocolate. He was playing a game on his PS5, but his arms were around Yejin like a large, comfy teddy bear. She leaned against his chest, hearing his heartbeat in sync with hers.

“Thanks,” she mumbled to him, and she could feel his heart pump faster.

“Any time,” he answered, pulling her closer to his chest.

Yejin continued to watch the characters and graphics flash across the screen. She sipped her hot chocolate as she placed her hands on one of Jeonghan’s hands, momentarily distracting him from his game. He recovered quickly and twisted his thumb so that he was caressing her palm.

“Jeonghan?”

He hummed in response.

“I think I like you.”

Jeonghan froze and his character died. He turned to her, ignoring the flashing message on the screen that spelled GAME OVER in red capital letters.

“You think?” he asked, voice cracking at the end.

Yejin shook her head quickly. “No, no. Not think. I do like you.”

She squirmed nervously; he was still at a loss for words. She vaguely watched his throat gulp as he swallowed.

“Really?” he asked, his voice raw and vulnerable.

Yejin understood why he was so hesitant. He had recently gotten out of a relationship—he didn’t know if he was ready to give his heart to someone else after losing it not too long ago.

“You don’t have to give me an answer right now,” Yejin assured, squeezing his wrist. “I’ll wait—”

“Yejin.”

Yejin glanced at Jeonghan’s serious expression; his jawline is firm and stiff and his eyebrows are slightly wrinkled. He stared at her for a while, deep in thought, before he leaned in to kiss her.

Her eyes fluttered shut in response. Jeonghan’s lips were slightly chapped but soft and gentle. She was frozen for a while, her mind unable to process what was happening at first. Then Jeonghan pulled away, and she grabbed his collar to pull him into her.

“Yejin,” Jeonghan said breathlessly, his hair tousled as he held Yejin in his arms. “I don’t want you to think I’m only using you as a rebound; I like you, from the bottom of my heart. Can I be your boyfriend?”

Yejin laughed at the innocent question and reached up to tuck one of his curls behind his ear. She leaned up to peck him again.

“Yes.”

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