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littlebent-notbroken · 3 years

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I truly wish there were a magic phrase that would get abusers to stop abusing. Originally, I wanted to do a “script” or sorts—what to say back when someone says… The tricky part about confronting someone who’s gaslighting is that they’ll dig their heels in deeper, claim that’s not what’s happening, and turn it around on you. But don’t lose hope. In my experience, one of the most successful ways to deal with an emotional abuser isn’t to convince them you’re right or even to convince them of what they’re doing—but to learn to trust my gut and my memories. Once I learned to stand firm in my truth, in what I knew to be true, I wouldn’t allow myself to be pushed around anymore. Please, dear reader, I implore you to take all that energy you’re using to convince someone that x, y, or z happened to you…and channel it into compassionately standing in what you already know to be true, without the need for their validation. They will not give it to you if it means they “lose.” As the saying goes: you don’t need that kind of negativity in your life. Bye Felicia! #gaslighting #gaslightingawareness #gaslightingisabuse #gaslighter #toxicparents #motherwound #reparenting #memory #mentalabuse #abuse #innerchild #consciousparenting #woundedchild #selfhealing #selflove #selfcompassion #childhoodemotionalneglect #adultchildrenofnarcissists #abusiveparents #narcissist #narcissisticabuse #gaslightingtips #selflove #selfcompassion https://www.instagram.com/p/CHgeffDjZD0/?igshid=1hpgsfr6eee4d

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overcomeandgrow · 5 years

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They say when you know better you do better. This statement is not necessarily true. You can know not to allow your inner child to come out when it is triggered, but if that trigger is not healed what you know goes out the window. One like to imply that because you are an adult you should know how to tame child like emotions. The truth of the matter is childhood is set to introduce you to adulthood. If your childhood was a fog of pain you know nothing in adulthood but that you now have the freedom to do what you want. What I am saying is be gentle when telling an wounded unstable child in an adult body to lock the inner child away and be grown. That only furthers the pain and the inner child will only destroy the adult, trying to get free. #woundedchild #overcomeandgrow #childlike #emotions #nurture #freedom #chains #breakfree #silenced #cryforhelp #awareness #empathy #message #begentle #scars #wounds #heart #selfcare #selflove #tuesday #abandonmentissues #human #traumaticbond #cleansing #purging #relief https://www.instagram.com/p/Bu8AlconFkR/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1p179d6ltbhxt

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wyldwon · 5 years

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WHY MEN OVER DOMINATE

A boy (man) without a father (mentor) is like a Warrior without a king.

He has no direction he has no purpose he has no guidance. He becomes lost, wondering, searching, looking for something to give his energy to.

Masculines energy is here to serve, it is the purpose of the divine masculine, and when there is no purpose, when there is no faith, and there is nothing to fight for.... the masculine DIES.... 💀

He loses his fire🔥, he loses his passion❤, he loses the very reason for his existence. He becomes an empty shell 🐚of what he was and from this place he is no good to anyone not even himself.

If the masculines energy is here to serve and he is not feeling like his energy is of value then what will he do with himself and how will he act in the world?

He walks around trying to prove himself 💪in every moment because he does not feel seen, he does not feel heard and he does not feel important. He over does it in ask his actions, in all his words, in all his energy hoping someone will see him, value him, actually hear him. He's looking for validation, he's looking for respect, he's looking for BROTHERHOOD. 👥

He's looking for LOVE...... ❤

It's not easy to love a man while he's in this place, while his sword is out in every moment, looking for an opportunity to prove himself. Dealing with the inner workings of a hurt child that just wants to be loved but doesn't know how to ask for it, doesn't know how to speak his needs, doesn't even know how to love himself.

This is the world that so many men live in. And this is why we have many immature warriors running around with their swords out.

I was one......

Still am on many levels......

But I'm just looking for love, just like the rest.

#love #lovealwayswins #libertion #freedom #life #masculine #masculinity #divinemasculine #awakenedmasculine #masculinerising #warrior #lovewarrior #woundedchild #mentorship #king #immatureman #man #men #lookingforlove #relationships #selflove #sword #truth #thehairyhealer #surrender

2 workshops coming up in Adelaide,

Conscious Relating YogaCycle Sunday July 7th. 5 spots left.

https://www.facebook.com/events/864177827262078/

Masculinity UN-Locked (men only) @theyogacentre Sunday July 14th with Greg Barwick

https://www.facebook.com/events/837970946561557/

Only 4 spots left for my Shameless Sex God (men's) program starting July 22nd.

What Shameless Sex God creates within the 10 weeks:

🔸 Redefining what it means to be a man.

🔸 Create a safe container for full expression.

🔸 Uncovers the collective projection from society of what it means to be a man

🔸 Empowerment of the feminine on the earth and in male bodies

🔸 The evolution of masculinity how it has changed and where it's going.

🔸 Re-establishment of power

🔸 Souls in male bodies.

🔸 How we've responded to the development of the change in the feminine from an Amazonian warrior to a young voluptuous woman to a thin athletic figure, as a man in society.

🔸 Shamelessness is the key to opening up authentic expression in men. A true sovereign man holds the presence needed for the feminine wisdom and power to truly impact the world.

🔸 Present consciousness witnessing someone's shame is all it takes to remove it.

🔸 How to hold loving reflection in the face of projection.

🔸 Reclaiming the innocence of masculinity and the power that true masculinity holds

🔸 The humility and ownership of past transgressions opens the space for the capacity of a greater evolution within the masculine principle for beings in male bodies.

If any of this is something that resonates, then set up a call with me and let's unite brothers.

https://calendly.com/the-hairy-healer/30min

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victoriaviveskhuong · 5 years

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BOOK DAY 65: People who have suffered trauma and abuse, regardless of the severity, will often respond in one of three ways: . 1) Continue the cycle by inflicting the same abuse on others. . 2) Enabling the cycle by doing nothing or embodying the "victim" mentality. . 3) Ending the cycle through conscious awareness and saying "NO MORE" thus, doing anything possible so that nobody have to go through the same again, including oneself. . Most of the traumas that we experience are inflicted on us by our fellow human beings who are unconscious of how deeply interconnected we are and that their actions affect themselves, others, and future generations. . I believe anyone can harness the courage to achieve healing through self-discovery and understanding oneself. I believe that you deserve all the happiness you can fathom. I believe that, together, we can make this happen. . I talk more about healing traumas, deepening conscious awareness and becoming a positive force for those around you, in my upcoming book, "In a Matter of Seconds". This book is my own next step in my personal journey of self healing and truly owning my responsibility to help others and make a positive impact on the world. . To your Healing. To your Happiness! . Victoria . #victoriaviveskhuong #victoriavives #traumarecovery #selfdiscovery #inamatterofseconds #inamatterofsecondsbook #abetterworld #beautifulhumankind #anythingpossible #selfawareness #posttraumatic #traumamanagement #traumahealing #childabuse #emotionalabuse #emotionalabuserecovery #emotionalabuseawareness #healingpath #thewoundedhealer #thehealingpath #woundedhealer #woundedhealers #woundedchild #woundedwarriors #transformation #couragetochange #100responsible #transcending #transcendingtrauma #woundedinnerchild (at Los Angeles County, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/BzqUGj1Aj31/?igshid=8vxeghg3jshg

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littlebent-notbroken · 3 years

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This post was inspired by the question “what is considered the ‘first step’ on a reparenting journey?” (See my lengthy response in my story!) And that was a VERY GOOD and VERY HARD question to answer. It really depends on the person because everyone has such unique wounds and everyone has a different catalyst for healing. Where I started could be similar and completely different from someone else’s beginning. But with any healing journey, I think the “first step” is taking an objective, non-judgemental look at ourselves and acknowledging and becoming aware and conscious of harmful thoughts, reactions, or triggers. And reparenting comes in by seeing how those thoughts, reactions, and triggers stem from a need not met in childhood. So if the wound is hyper-independence, maybe in childhood your caregivers were unable to provide basic needs and you had learn how to take care at yourself younger than you should have (make yourself breakfast, lunch for school, dinner after school, taking public transit to get to and from places, etc). And this can show up in adulthood as not relinquishing any control, no one can be trusted to take care of things because they’ll just let you down... And reparenting could look like the wise inner adult saying, “doing everything yourself is causing burnout and unnecessary stress. see who can support you and where else you can be supported.” (Or something) Anyway “step one”: become aware and conscious of wounds. . . . #reparenting #healing #healingjourney #healingstory #innerchildwork #innerchild #woundedinnerchild #childhood #childhoodtrauma #traumarecovery #consciousparenting #woundedchild #selfhealing #selflove #selfcompassion #childhoodemotionalneglect #adultchildrenofnarcissists #abusiveparents #themotherwound #motherwound #emotionalabusesurvivor https://www.instagram.com/p/CF5okMBjXW-/?igshid=prrgssjbu7dg

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littlebent-notbroken · 3 years

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Credit to original author. Handwriting by me 🙃 . “Darling, This healing comes in waves. On some days you will drown, and on others you will float. On some days you will feel broken, and on other days you will feel renewed. Be patient with yourself.” (I don’t remember where I saw this but I had written it in my journal forever ago and I love this reminder!!!). . Healing is not linear. It’s not formulaic — “if I do A, B, and C, then I’ll be cured!” . Inner work is going to take time. You have to strip yourself down to your truest self, a self that’s buried under years of conditioning and defense mechanisms. It’s also your most vulnerable self. Practice self compassion. You don’t ask a person with a broken leg to run even with a cast. (Weird analogy I know but you get the gist.) . . . . . #healing #healingprocess #healingjourney #itcomesandgoesinwaves #mindbody #subconcious #selfcompassion #encouragement #reminder #selfgrowth #selflove #selfhealers #selfhealing #selfhealer #patience #holisticpsychology #motherwound #depression #mentalhealth #anxiety #anxietyrelief #traumarecovery #traumahealing #woundedchilded #reparenting #innerchild #innerwork https://www.instagram.com/p/CEHgs6pD4sx/?igshid=kzudmnvwjmfr

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