#wondering whats my next step

[pickled-flowers]

Saw some of the grossest parenting today in the bus

#this dad was on his phone the whole bus ride ok #and his two kids were screaming arguing #at most he would periodically tell them to lower their voice while still on his phone #one time he told them to stop the one sitting next to him hit him 😭 and he went back to look at his phone with no reaction #my guy something is seriously wrong with you #your kids are screaming at each other doesn't even matter all that much that we are in the bus rn #theyre not just being loud kids you need to do smt!!!!!! its too early for this!!! i could hear them even with my noise cancelling headphone #anyways #ive never seen smt like this #and i work in a mall i see lots of parents and kids #idk smt really disgusting about a parent just not even interested in engaging with their kids #dude no wonder they're loud they probably want ur attention #also this one lady once who came in wjth a big stroller #and the store where i work has little moving rooms between the aisle so this woman decided TO LEAVE THE STROLLER WITH A KID INSIDE AT THE #FRONT OF THE STORE #the kids started crying and his hrother (toddler not in the stroller but not following the mom for some reason) started exploring and i #i had to watch them until the mom came back but like the woman just left them there??? #i just stepped in but what if i hadnt??? lady????????? #i see lots of cute interactions of course #like this little girl who came with who i think is her grandpa and he asked me to help her chose her next manga read 😭💖 #i basically work in a book/toy store #theres a lot of candy as well the kids love it #idk i like seeing kids being happy ok it is healing #like all the kids sitting on the floors deep in their books while the parents shop 😭😭😭 makes me smile every time top tier behavior

[sysig]

Silly goofy StanNarrator (Patreon)

#Doodles #The Stanley Parable #TSP #Silly mode leftover doodles from my alt notebook #I wasn't as concerned with making these finished or pretty but they did turn out cute >:3c #Since I've established that Sinister thinks in images the next logical step is imagining the Narrator - and he hates that ✨ #He is not made to be perceived! He is an imageless entity! A total enigma! Lol #If we as an audience can imagine what a Narrator might look like - to the best of our abilities - I don't see why Stanley wouldn't #Even if he's not Exact - personally I don't think it matters lol the Narrator isn't /meant/ to have a fixed form imo - it's still flustering #You give him so much material to work with Narra! To imagine what face you might make or your body language #Or worst yet when he plays with the mental projection like a doll - much like what the Narrator does to Stanley hehehe #How does it feel to be ''made'' to do things that wouldn't reflect you! It's an interesting role reversal that works within their confines #Also makes me wonder how much Narra would play into it haha - if Stanley ''flipped him upside down'' would he get dizzy? Even a little? #To what degree is he real! To what degree is Stanley real if he's not being interacted with!! The themes!!!! <3 #Anyway lol ♪ Silly Stanley noise chart for funsies #There are a lot of sounds humans can make with their mouths even discounting vocal cords - I could definitely see him doing verbal stims #Who me projecting again? Psh no anyway (lol) #And then some kisses! This is my first time drawing my versions kissing!!! Which actually solidified a new headcanon for the Narrator haha #Because he (ostensibly) needs his mouth to narrate he doesn't like kisses on the mouth :) He weak to it! #Doesn't stop Sin from enjoying kissing him lol - it's a good way to shut up him In Case of Power Play #But sometimes♪ he'll try to respect his wishes - not all the time tho haha

[kodzukoi]

hi guys, it's been a while :3

#oh yeah #also i finished my first year at uni!!! #i'm determined to become an academic weapon next year and am actively taking steps in becoming so >:) #little bit of a life update: #i'm doing well #i have yet to fix my sleep schedule tbh... #it's fine though #um what else #i'm trying to get into hsr but i'm sorry it's just not the same </3 #i'm not even trying to compare it to genshin please don't misunderstand #but i enjoy the exploration aspect of genshin and hsr imo is more combat focused which is wonderful but just not for me yk?? #but i still have it downloaded and open from time to time #i wanted to pull for jin yuan but i'm not so sure i will now tbh #i don't have that many pulls in the first place lol #but how are y'all?? let me know deeeeetsssss :)

[fluffs-n-stuffs]

Pokémon Horizons Episode 26 spoilers under the cut!

OH SO WE WEREN'T BEING JUST DELUSIONAL,,,,,, THEY'RE DOING IT,,,,,,,,,,,, THEY'RE ACTUALLY DOING IT,,,, , ,

#fluff binges !!! #not a spoiler but can we talk about how they also switched Liko and Roy's parts and added new verses for the ending rap it was SO cute 🥺💖 #I'm also gonna miss the first opening since I got attached to it but OH MY GOD THE NEW ONE............ SO INSANE. ACTUAL PEAK. I KNEEL. #ok with my spoiler tags in place now I can AKJSDHAJSNDKASJKDFNSJDFSND #OH MY GOD THEY'RE ACTUALLY GOING TO DO IT THEY'RE ACTUALLY EXPLORING MY ANGSTY SON'S CHARACTER HOLY SHIT #AMETHIO BBY PLEASE I KNOW YOU'RE BROODING RN AND BEATING YOURSELF UP MENTALLY FOR THAT LOSS BUT DON'T PUSH YOUR LOVED ONES AWAYYYYYYYYYY #ZIRC AND ONIA ARE WORRIEDDDDDDDDD DO YOU SEE THEM WONDERING ABOUT YOU THEY EVEN TRIED TO TALK TO YOU BUT YOU WOULDNT BUDGEEEEEEEE 😭😭😭😭😭 #I need a moment where Amethio gets to be hugged by these two fr they're legit his guardians at this rate #Amethio also only seems to open up about his vulnerability to Ceruledge from the looks of it and something about that makes me So Insane #WHAT WAS HE TRYING TO SAY IN THIS SCENE ACTUALLY LIKE . IS HE APOLOGIZING? DOES HE BLAME HIMSELF FOR THE LOSS??? #IS HE AFRAID OF LOOKING WEAK TO HIS PARTNER MON OR IS HE DOUBTING THE TRUST HE HAS IN THEM................... #/head in HANDS #we're gonna get to see the explorers together again next episode and it seems like Spinel and Hamber reacted to something Amethio said #is he proposing that he go after Terapagos himself? that the others don't interfere because it's a Personal matter now from that loss? #they're not gonna like that if that's the case........ Hamber might insist on reinforcements or pull extra strings without Amethio knowing #everyday we get one step closer to Amethio redemption #(or alternatively corruption like can you imagine this all weighing on his mind and just twisting it in all the wrong directions) #(though now that I mention that it seems more like a possibility for Spinel --- I still think he's the most capable of betraying everyone) #(like he seems the most malicious at this rate and his capabilities can be quite terrifying- he may as well decide to-- #--erase the other explorers' memories and make them work for him if he was pushed hard enough . Like . Can You Imagine.......... /deranged) #I'm rambling at this rate ASKSDJHSDKFNSD but this series gives me so much serotonin and I'm so grateful to have started it 🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖 #pokemon horizons #anipoke #pokeani #amethio #explorer amethio #amethio pokemon #zirc pokemon #onia pokemon #ceruledge

[couriersiccs]

are we doing anything we want to be doing. hello? hello? are we living our lives as we would ever freely choose to live them? hello? are we happy? are we living before we die? are we thinking about how we'll think back on our lives when they're about to end? are we going to be satisfied? are we going to wish we did more? is there anything we can do that won't make us wish we did more? can we do more? are we doing all we can? is this all there is? is this how life is? are we participant or observer? do we get to choose? what do we do if we don't?

hello?

#.txt #the cicadas kept dying outside. #live before you die #don't mind me it's Depression Season #but mostly it's coming to a plateau at a long period of uncovering shit and growth-i-guess #and now wondering what the next step is and seeing that it's just more difficult #and just wanting to go back to sleep and go back to sleep and go back to sleep and go back to sleep #and never being able to #i want to spend more time with my dog and i can't because i sell my time for our food and shelter #she gets older and i have no control over my time #and i am losing my mind over it more and more every single day

[yatiso]

the world works in such mysterious ways

#🍒 #went to buy a vacuum earlier and right as i went to push the last button to buy it the power went out in my building and next door #like thee very second i clicked like there were steps before that took some time like movin monies around #but aint that crazy #and then the other option that i havent applied to for the only sorta job id leave this one for msgd me on indeed first #which is baller bc this one i have an interview w tomorrow would likely mean a pay cut (not good) whereas w this opt id make same or more #i wonder if i pulled a card for the day rn what itd be…

[orcelito]

Also the fact that it's 4/20. The holiday I "observe" (typically by making jokes) despite not being a weed smoker. And I spent all of today filled with dread, actively miserable, actively distraught, and then vaguely dissatisfied/depressed

😊✌😋 happy 4/20 to a certain dead bastard in particular

#speculation nation #negative/ #ok geeze ive made enough allusions to it and i kinda want ppl to know exactly why i got so freaked out by it today #uhm. preemptive trigger tag. it's relevant. #suicide ment/ #anyways an employee's step dad killed himself with a gun in front of her late last night. like literally right next to her apparently. #and the other employee was on the phone as it happened & saw the scene after the fact when she picked up the first employee #they were both so distraught & obviously traumatized. scared of losing their jobs if they didnt come to work #but we told them not to worry about it. we'd find a way to cover for them. it'll be fine. #and i hold true to that. no way im forcing them to work after dealing with that. #privately though im distraught with sympathy for these poor girls. it hurt my heart so much to hear them talk about it #and then there's the entire topic of suicide. the image in my head. the empathy for what these girls went through #the first girl. shes only 17. she apparently hated this man. and it's no wonder why. #im filled with so much anger for what he did to her. killing himself would be traumatizing regardless #but to do it RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER? to the point where she apparently had burns from the gunfire????? #im angry. im livid. these are my girls and they went through something no one ever should have to. so young too... #and. yeah that's why im so fucked up right now #the general stress of my life is not helping lol

[birdsinmytree]

#obsessed with this one today or something idk whats going on but im having a wonderful time . #like . stuck in my head all day no matter what i do. ive listened to it a billion times by now. #i think the next step is to take a bite out of the vinyl . i need to eat this song

[sovonight]

.

#my only note for the next part of the sith au is ‘‘cela accidentally hurts jaq and he’s ok with it but she’s deeply not’’ #and yet somehow it's not at all writing itself. HMM #maybe it's bc i'm also trying to fit ''jaq's best friend thinks cela's manipulating him and tries to convince jaq to 'break up' with her #but only ends up breaking jaq's trust in him & jaq does something terrible to him #thus taking his first real step to the dark side'' in there too #& also trying to retcon the end of the last part to delete everything that happened after leaving korriban bc it was too big of a timeskip #& also trying to think up what cela would possibly do for jaq's training/lessons #& at some point during all this establish that the jedi jaq failed to kill has gotten news back to the council that cela's still alive #so now the council wants cela dead* by any means necessary (*something close to death but not quite) #oh and somehow cela has to seriously reflect on her place in revan's army and wonder why revan Does keep her around and become #convinced that 1) she's on thin ice 2) jaq becoming her apprentice was orchestrated by revan who's using him to secretly evaluate #her DS level. which is partly bc she finally saw his korriban vision and read it as him being eternally loyal to revan #but also partly bc she needs an excuse to push him away bc she's afraid of letting him love her #oh and somehow their developing force bond is like stifled and one-way bc of cela's refusal to let him in #and jaq should somehow almost die from it to make cela think emotional connection is bad #and everyone who knows cela's entire backstory should believe that there's no way for cela/jaq to happen without one of them dying #and in fact revan's banking on it #but it turns out cela's refusal to fully connect with him is exactly what's been making jaq like a finite battery that can be drained & die #so like as usual the big bad is a fear of intimacy and the whole thing ends with cela accepting jaq's love #and once she Does connect with him & complete the force bond jaq is now more like a wire connecting cela to the endless force #zero resistance

[blunderpuff]

an old lady came in today, followed by a frantic and hovering younger woman

Old Lady (to my coworker): “Can you see about a book I had placed on reserve?”

Younger Woman (to OL): “Ma’am, are you sure you’re alright?”

OL (to coworker): “I think it was in last week, but I didn’t get a phone call...”

YW (to OL): “I have my insurance card in my truck, are you sure you’re okay?”

OL (to coworker): “Oh, do you have a paper towel? I’ve gotten mud on your counter... I just got hit by a car.”

Me and my coworker, who had been trying to parse this relationship: “?!?!?!?!?!!?”

The Younger Woman had side-swiped the Older Lady in the parking lot and knocked her down, and the Older Lady’s priority was literally the book she put on hold. O_O

#library #the Older Lady had been walking a straight line towards the library and the truck was cruising next to her #but the OL stepped to the side to avoid slush/snow chunk in the parking lot and walked into the broad side of the YW's truck #the OL seemed to be okay but shaken and we kind of bullied her into sitting in a chair and telling us her dtr's phone number #so we called and texted the dtr who luckily lives in town and got there in about 20 minutes #and my supe called the 911 dispatch and i guess absolutely nothing else was happening in town bc the ambo was there in literally 1 minute #and fire came too (they like to feel useful) and a police traffic officer came to get statements and stuff #the OL was like 'i'll drive myself home' and i was like 'I WILL DRIVE YOU TO THE HOSPITAL MYSELF' #the paramedics were absolutely wonderful with this lady. they were so gentle and kind (she was easy to be kind to... but still.) #and after all that?? the OL's book and come and gone but the phone notifications glitched last week and didn't alert anyone #so that poor OL didn't even have a book to read in the emergency room (her dtr and son-in-law came to get her) #my brother (also a paramedic) once ran a call for an older lady who was having chest pain and was afraid she had a heart attack #it turns out she did NOT have a heart attack-- she had been scrubbing her bathtub and the pressure from leaning on the side of the tub #LITERALLY BROKE ONE OF HER RIBS and she didn't know it until later that evening when it started hurting to breathe #so even though our Old Lady today didn't think anything was broken... :| she's 81. so yeah we harangued her into going to the hospital #'what did you do today merry?' 'i bullied an old woman into going to the hospital' #long tags

[just-a-simple-dyke]

People in love stink

#yes this is about kp #cute episode #im a little confused though... this was a step down from previous episodes in terms of form and content im wondering why #i like the breather after so many intense eps and presumably were gonna get tense again after this #but i felt like this was directed by a different person entirely🤔🤔 though they have 3 directors so maybe its just that #anyway this had a lot of shots where i just kind of...missed something like they werent quite right #the subject not really centered or something blocking the view those kinds of things...and audio quality but that might be #my illegal streaming site lol #anyway i actually liked most of the humor and cute scenes i think we need that if their commitment is to be believable #i also liked kims scenes..hes really cold it seems just drops chay and porsche when theyre no longer of any use or interest #chay was cuteee i wonder how he got the address really🤔🤔 maybe he just stalked kim lmao #im sure next eps we're getting back to gritty!! but this ep was quite effective in showing how much they want to try for each other #and how they love not being in a mafia situation for once lol which helps explain them staying together after something does happen #i wonder what tawan is gonna do...seems like theyre keeping him in a dungeon or smth hzjdhdjf #kinnporsche

[cinewhore]

I don’t even know what i want from my writing anymore.

But then i think is it truly a question of want? Need? Does my writing have to provide me with something? Can it not simply just be writing? Something I enjoy?

Thinking of little me and the piles of notebooks i had where i just wrote whatever. I wonder what she would think of me today. Probably that I’m not silly and I’m not having fun.

#yeah i think that’s it #I’m not having fun #someone i know just got signed by an agent and while i know I’m in the right place among the right crowd #i keep questioning when my moment will arrive #and what that will look like #i think I’m becoming more like this because graduation is approaching and i have no plans after school which is normally #*normal #i just wish to be secure #and to let myself feel things without wondering what the next step is going to be #it’s too far ahead to predict #the future isn’t real anyways - no need in sulking over it #i am ok i am just thinking - pls leave ur advice at the door if i didn’t ask for it #now that’s what i call blogging

[alllelements]

The elation of getting accepted into the masters program I'm interested in immediately dampened by the 10 emails each with different riddles meant to guide me on the path through the dizzying labyrinth of university registration.

#my favorite is the repeated DO NOT MISS THIS DEADLINE while not once mentioning the actual deadline #email says to find the deadline one must look at the webpage #what webpage‚ you wonder‚ since the university must have dozens strewn across the internet #it does not say #despite this you find the webpage and click on the section that applies for you: enrollment deadline for masters degree #you think you've found what you were searching‚ but it's only another hint! Go to this Portal it says! the deadline will be listed there! #there is no link to this mysterious portal so you go on another quest to find it #when you click on the portal it asks you to log in‚ but first you must download some apps onto your phone and step through seven rings #and solve riddles three! #only then can you view this secret deadline‚ upon which the next years of your life rely. #sorry got carried off there but anyway‚ I got in and I'm simultaneously happy and crying #alllel posts

[myfirstandlast]

if u identify as a lesbian and ur partner comes out to u as transmasc/a trans man where should u go from there w ur self identification

#this isn’t happening to me im just wondering #i don’t want to refer to myself as queer at any point in time so that’s not an option to me #and the only other times i see this situation in discussion replies are like omg girlie just id as pan !! ☺️☺️ like i’ll blow this building #like it seems like the obvious next step would be bisexual but like. outside of that partnership id still be going about my love life in a #completely lesbian way like id still never want to be w a man #so where does that leave u #is it wrong to leave that relationship to preserve ur self id if u still care for them or love them #or like what do u do if u don’t nevesssrily want to leave them #idk i just wonder abt this bc id-ing as an enby lesbian rlly opens up the door for this kind of gender analysis to actually realise u might #be a trans man idk im not trying to be insulting in any way abt this #i just don’t know what i’d do in that position just wonder what others would think/feel

[alternautxyz]

trying to decide which pokemon to obsess over because all of them are all so GOOD

hELp

#pokemon #why did i put so much in the tags #lechonk is a round little guy with a funny name #smoliv is a smol olive who is pathetic(affectionate) and is a minor inconvenience away from breaking into tears #pawmi is just adorable an has yummy colours what else do i say #and the bow legendaries are pretty cool motorcycles in their own unique ways #miraidon's got my heart and cash tho since futuristic robots are sick #damn the pokemon they've shown so far are SO GOOD #i actually have some faith in the game now huh #this plus free to explore in any order open world and multiplayer sounds like the next step for pokemon #also the professors are cool #and more toby fox music is always welcome #the graphics that look a bit off but its not that bad #overall the trailer did wonder for my hype and while this means nothing about the quality of the game when it comes out #i have some optimism for the series #alttalks

[elenaire-marione-montes]

Fifth OC (Original Character): Hrávahyalmo Falmahiþion Altaluimë

"His silver hair flowed like moonlight, and his grey eyes held a keen awareness that saw beyond the surface, so his presence signals an undercurrent of tension; His grace adorned with the emerald [and olive] green robes reminiscent of the seawater and reflected the nobility that echoed through his lineage." — The Long Ballad of Eärendil

Hrávahyalmo Falmahiþion Altaluimë was the underrated Lord of Poreč and Rovinj, the middle-born son of Lord Falmahiþo and Lady Siloratanë who was born on 12 June (12. Lipnja) in mid-Fifth Age (2439 BCE). His love life started when he met Lady Halatirnë II in Jelsa, Hvar Island (or in Beaches of Elende in Alternative ver.) and got married as her husband. However, he was encountered by Šimun, who possessed a charm as alluring as it was dangerous that was drawn to Halatirnë like a moth to a flame.

Artwork Description: Hrávahyalmo was described as frost-white-haired, pale-skinned, donning his robes of olive and emerald green and silver details. Background: Green ocean waves and the so-called oldest known emblem of Croatia—six-pointed star and a cresent moon behind him.

Names: His Mother-name/Amilessë - Hravahyalmo translates from Quenya meaning "Wild Seashell". Like a seashell buffeted by the waves, Hrávahyalmo possessed a spirit that could not be contained, his essence as boundless and enduring as the sea itself. His Father-name/Ataressë - Falmahiþion, meaning "Wave Mist," just as mist rises from the waves, so too did Hrávahyalmo's father embody the fluidity and unpredictability of the sea, his presence a constant source of wonder and mystery. As an epithet, Envinyataro, or "Healer," speaks to Hrávahyalmo's compassionate nature and his dedication to the art of healing. And his surname - Altaluimë, meaning "Great Tides," is a surname that echoes the ebb and flow of the ocean's rhythms..

#books #non canon #artwork #wattpad #tolkien legendarium #wizarding world #balkan #elemmírë #my ocs #pardon me because my watercolour art is not good enough but i tried my best #watercolour art #i use my black pen for my ultimate sketch step #i don't know what i should tag next #theelemmírion #the elemmírion #the balkan silm trash #hrávahyalmo means either “wild seashell” or “wild conch” so yeah #the story is very balkanized #i wonder why did someone arrange his complete name like that #original character #oc art