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cockroachmotherfucker10 · 4 years

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PRIDEFALL UPDATE: real or fake?

What is Pridefall?

Operation Pridefall, also known as Project Pridefall or simply Pridefall, refers to an attack planned by /pol/ (a political discussion board on the anonymous website 4chan) for all of June, AKA Pride month. The original 4chan thread, which has since been deleted, was primarily focused on “redpilling,” i.e. spreading queerphobic propaganda to make people question the LGBTQ+ community. However, now that it has spread outside 4chan, there are threats of harassing, doxxing, and outing queer people (especially minors) on social media, spamming gore and rape videos in private messages and Pride tags, and even kidnapping, assaulting, or killing queer people in real life.

Specific targets include Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, and dating apps. The goal is to go after smaller accounts so the queerphobia isn’t lost in the comments.

Is Pridefall real?

Yes and no.

I searched “pridefall” on 4chan last night. Apparently any new threads on it are being deleted, and anytime someone mentions it, everyone calls them slurs and says no one is doing it.

However, Pridefall is gaining some traction on Instagram--I have seen it for myself. I don’t have TikTok or any dating apps, but I’ve heard that some people are spamming homophobia on TikTok. As for Twitter, I only looked briefly, but I saw some Pridefall accounts there, as well as a lot of warnings and blocklists from people who are worried about it.

I’ve also heard that there have been a few Reddit and Discord raids, and that there is an Operation Pridefall Discord server (someone who spied on them says they have been banned on Discord as well as a platform called Riot before, so very few people are left on the Discord server now).

What do you think, Lia?

This is not coming from 4chan. No one on 4chan is interested anymore.

Most likely, people outside of 4chan heard about it and decided to take matters into their own hands.

The original 4chan thread wanted to make Pridefall “normie-palatable” by avoiding Nazi imagery or other overt unpleasantness, but I have seen a LOT of both on Instagram. This reinforces my belief that 4chan isn’t doing this.

A lot of the people behind this are young, or at least unsophisticated. Most of the Pridefall accounts on Instagram engage in very childish trolling, and one of them said they were a minor. Some of the threats I’ve seen are so outlandish that I can only imagine they came from a fairly young person.

My guess? Most of these people are around 13-19.

There are also very few of them and some of them probably have multiple accounts. Anti-Pridefall accounts outnumber them by far.

However, on Instagram I’ve seen Pridefall accounts following each other and commenting on each other’s posts, so there may be a few groups working together.

A lot of this shit is going to get deleted. I know Instagram is working through reports very slowly right now because they have fewer people available due to COVID-19, but most of the worst accounts I saw last night were deleted by this morning. I saw some more accounts deleted today.

Most, if not all, of these Pridefallers are just trying to scare us. Because they’re probably quite young, there’s very few of them, their accounts keep getting deleted, and law enforcement can track online activity, there is no way they have the balls or resources needed to coordinate major attacks.

There is a very, very slight chance this could spill over into real life, but as long as you practice basic online safety, you will be fine.

That being said, if you are threatened or doxxed by a Pridefall account, PLEASE contact the police. Better safe than sorry.

I do think that the threat of being doxxed or outed is more real than the threat of being attacked. I have already seen one Pridefall account who posted a trans boy’s address on Instagram (he is okay, he posted recently) and another who posted someone else’s address.

There is little chance this will last throughout Pride month. Apparently the goal is for Pridefall to worsen until the end of June, but given that this is most likely just some vastly outnumbered teenage trolls who are bored in quarantine, I seriously doubt they’ll be able to stay interested for a whole month.

This might not be as big on Tumblr. Tumblr is a lot more anonymous than, say, Instagram, which will hopefully deter would-be doxxers. It’s also known to be a highly liberal and queer-friendly site, so any Pridefaller with half a brain cell should know that A) their content is sure to be outnumbered and reported (only us Tumblr users know how bad staff is at deleting questionable stuff), and B) anyone with the original goal of “redpilling” is sure to fail here. Plus, I only remember seeing few, if any, mentions of Tumblr on Pridefall planning threads.

Still, expect to see some Pridefall activity here. Unsurprisingly, not all of these Pridefallers have half a brain cell. Some of them will definitely be unable to resist the lure of a community as openly queer as Tumblr, and we’ve all seen or heard about doxxing, harassment, gore, Nazis, and queerphobes on here. Also, 4chan has historically had some beef with Tumblr, so young teenage boys who idolize 4chan may target us for that reason.

How can I stay safe?

If you have any social media accounts where you A) have posted identifying personal information, and B) are openly supportive of the LGBTQ+ community (especially if you’re queer yourself), put them on private for June. Any other accounts are probably fine to stay public.

If you need a private Tumblr, you can make a password-protected secondary account and only share the password with mutuals you trust.

It is probably okay to be openly queer on a private account (e.g. have pronouns/rainbow emojis in your Instagram bio), since a private account is not likely to be doxxed. But if you want to be extra careful, remove queer identifiers from anything that is publicly visible.

Use Pridefall blocklists. They’re all over Instagram and Twitter. I may repost some here.

Report any Pridefall accounts you see. This is VERY important because this is how we can actually get rid of Pridefall content.

DON’T RESPOND TO ANY PRIDEFALLERS WHO PERSONALLY INTERACT WITH YOU. I know it’s tempting to give a snarky reply, but if they message you, comment on your post, etc, just block them. Seriously, don’t feed the trolls. It's exactly what they want.

Make sure your password game is strong. Use a different password for every site (I know, I know, it sucks), and use passwordmeter.com to test their strength. Write them all down on a piece of paper.

Make sure your username game is strong. Don’t use the same username for multiple sites, and avoid putting personal information in your username, such as your name or birthday.

Do NOT open random links!! Pridefallers could message you links that will give you viruses or track your IP address.

Don’t accept DMs or follows from people you don’t know. Pridefall accounts don’t always look like Pridefall accounts. Some of them are undercover.

Use a VPN. This is probably a little overkill unless you’re particularly at risk of being doxxed, but it will hide your IP address.

Be careful who you interact with. A lot of queer people on Instagram are DMing Pridefall accounts or commenting on their posts, but this could make you a target. As helpful as anti-Pridefall accounts are, you might even be targeted for following those.

Be wary of Pride tags. Unfortunately, a lot of Pridefall accounts plan to infiltrate tags commonly used by queer creators during Pride month. Use discretion when looking for queer content.

Be safe IRL. Lock your doors, lock your windows, be aware of your surroundings, don’t walk alone in poorly lit places, know basic self-defense, etc. Again, I absolutely do not think people will be attacked in real life, but you should be doing this shit all the time, not just in June. Thanks to COVID-19, you’re safer inside anyway!!

Make yourself hard to dox. Even though I have a very unusual first name (it's not really Lia), I am extremely hard to find online. I just went into an incognito browser window and searched my first and last name in quotation marks, but I didn’t find myself until page 4 of Google (and that result wasn’t even posted by me). I’m only half as careful as I could be, but here’s some of the things I do:

-I never use a picture of myself as my profile pic, except for Facebook and Instagram, which are both on the highest privacy settings possible.

-If I post identifying information on a public account (my college, my age, etc), I use a pseudonym or my first name only.

-On Instagram, I only use my first name, and I used special characters to type it, so you won’t find me if you search my name.

-On Facebook, I only accept friend requests from people I know. Most, if not all, of my Instagram followers are IRL friends, friends of IRL friends, and trusted Internet friends.

-If I’m really being paranoid, I’ll make a brand-new email account to sign up for a site. That way, my accounts aren’t all linked through one email address.

-Before I post a picture online, I delete the EXIF data with verexif.com, since EXIF data can hold GPS coordinates.

🌈 Stay safe, everyone.

You will not be harmed. You will be okay. Like cockroaches, we are survivors, and we will get through this!! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

-Mod Lia

#mod lia #og post #og post cmf #pridefall #operation pridefall #pride fall #pride #pride month #lgbt #lgbtq #gay #safety #psa #please reblog #pride 2020 #lgbtqia #lgbt pride

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paladin-shenanigans · 3 years

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[ text ID: paladin-shenanigans ]

hello all and welcome to paladin-shenanigans!!! this is an independent blog featuring headcanons and brief one-shots of your favorite paladins and side characters from the netflix series voltron: legendary defender. this blog has been around since 2018, but i’ve decided to revive it in fall 2021! it is centered around answering writing requests for your favorite characters and relationships from the series, and my ask box is also open to chat as well, i love talking to people!

i’m making this post mainly because lots of people have had trouble reading the rules and guidelines for requests on this blog, so under the cut you’ll find them written out for you! as a pinned post, it can also be used to access links to find all my tags and everything i’ve written so far.

my name is noah (he/him, they/them acceptable) and i’m the mod of this blog! i’m 21 years old and a senior music major with an outside field of sociology, which is also code for extremely busy. my activity tends to be sporadic because of this so i may need a lot of time to complete any requests that come in! thank you for your understanding!

click the “read more” button to view the rules and links!

[ text ID: rules ]

ABSOLUTELY NO HOMOPHOBES, RACISTS, SEXISTS, TERFS, SWERFS, OR GENERAL BIGOTS & CREEPS ALLOWED ON THIS BLOG. y’all are shit and i don’t want you anywhere near me.

this is an open blog, meaning that all shippers can interact. although i will say that i personally am not comfortable with shaladin ships or ships involving lotor and the paladins, so you will not see any of that on this blog. specifically, no pidge x other paladins (x reader is of course fine), only shiro x adam/curtis/reader, and lotura is fine. klance is also my ship bias. as for drama and discourse, please look elsewhere. i want to keep this space positive and fun.

another thing i want to get out of the way quickly is the fact that i reserve the right to decline or delete any requests for any reason. this may be due to the fact that i don’t have any ideas for your request, your request makes me uncomfortable, or it’s not something i personally find interesting or entertaining. no hard feelings to any of you guys who send me stuff that i may end up declining, it’s just that i want to start making things more comfortable for myself around here!

please only send in ONE request every 48 hours, INCLUDING from other blogs you run. anon messages are welcome, but if i suspect that the same anon is sending me requests within the 48-hour span, i reserve the right to turn it off. NOTE: as of 7/2/2022, anonymous messages are turned OFF due to anonymous harassment received on a couple of my other accounts. i expect to turn them back on sometime within the month.

ALWAYS indicate what type of media you want me to write. right now i’m accepting requests for headcanons and short drabbles.

x reader requests are 100% welcome and are actually a main highlight of this blog. having the reader inserted actually gives me a lot of ideas for things i may want to write about!

NSFW requests are welcome! although i may be a bit picky or selective about them. i’m still getting used to writing smut.

all triggers will be tagged! please don’t hesitate to ask for me to tag something, i may be forgetful but i want to try making this blog a safe space for everyone!

i usually do requests in the order that i receive them. if for some reason you need a request done within a specific set of time, feel free to contact me and we’ll work something out.

i try to do at least 4-5 for multi character requests, but i may do up to 10 (or more) for single-character requests.

lastly, HAVE FUN!! this is supposed to be an encouraging and positive space. please feel free to reach out to me for anything and i’ll try to help! also don’t hesitate to ask questions if you have any!

[ text ID: links ]

MASTERLIST

TAGS

about the mod

to-do list: 7 requests

#voltron #vld #voltron writing #voltron headcanons #noah rambles #pinned post

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the-bjd-community-confess · 3 years

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More Divaz confos

Mod: Round two of these, previously: link. There’s some interesting customer reviews in this batch (5 and 8) which may be useful to readers.

1.Vic3mage "the secret bjdivaz vip group is just pictures of boxes coming in and going out". Yeah, between the bitching about d0llshe, asking people to post on doa for them, dunking on ex-customers, posting pics of random doll parts that they can't identify which doll they're supposed to go with, whining about how little money they make, whining when ppl e-mail them, whining. Yeah, other than that it's just boxes, and alpacas u can buy off amazon anyway lol.

~Anonymous

2.The butthurt users crying and guilttripping under every Divaz confession who have never been seen before elsewhere on this blog are extremely unsuspicious and unproblematic and definitely unconnected to Divaz and unbiased in every possible way

~Anonymous

3.idk shit abt bjd1vas but v1cemage i can absolutely tell you the shit about ch0o is 100% accurate, fucker's got a long, long history of being an awful little man that stretches well beyond his involvement in the doll community. between the two i'd still trust bjd1vas over ch00 ch00 the fool any day!

~Anonymous

4.The Z3st and Div4s thing is really silly and both entities were being shady but did they really have to take the DZ waiting room down with them? :( He had even made a separate thread about it......

~Anonymous

5. RE: BJD Divaz

I’ve been a customer of BJD Divaz since they first started, when it was only run by Chart3rline. I even contacted other BJD companies trying to persuade them to work with Divaz as their US representative. Most declined because they didnt like D's commission fee, but I was able to persuade a few of them.

I asked them to purchase a doll off DOA because I couldnt afford the asking price, and while they did, I found out later that instead of agreeing to purchase the seller's price, they negotiated the price to be lower. This significantly cheaper price was not passed down to me. I paid the full price +the commission fee based on that full price. I am disappointed I was not told this. This is when I stopped viewing them as a "friend" and instead, as a business. I dont hold this against them, it’s context to what Im going to say later.

I’ve stopped purchasing from D after my recent order from them. This company usually takes 3 or less months to make a doll. I’ve ordered the doll from D and it took 11 months. They let me know it arrived to them in March and that it will be shipped soon, except it only shipped on July, and only after I sent them several "reminder" emails. Before people in the comments try to put the blame on me for not sending a reminder soon, please keep in mind that I acknowledged the email in March and confirmed everything and they keep stressing to not send them emails because they are busy, I’ve emailed once every month since. I’ve since switched to ACBJD and Ive been happy with communication and the dolls ordered. I imagine ACBJD gets the same amount of emails, but they dont berate their customers if they email more than once.

I regret when people wanted a D0llshe, but not deal with him, I always recommended D. I would warn people of ordering directly and instead go through D. They assured buyers they would be handling communication and all the efforts so they wouldnt worry, except they didn’t. A person that I’ve recommended D to, who surpassed 2 years, keeps messaging me for help because D wouldnt reply to their emails. She is respectful, sweet and a timid person, not a Karen. This person, emailed D without a reply so would email a week later, only to be told that their email would be pushed down to the bottom if emailed again. No response, so she goes to FB and IG, who both tell her to email because they arent the person running orders. Finally got a response that they would get their refund, after D0llshe sends D's payment, but minus the PP fees. 3 months later and theres no refund, only a promise of them getting it later. Why is the customer missing out on fees when they have no doll? Customer emails d0llshe and he says he cant offer refund, because they didn’t order through them, which is understandable, but when all options are out for a customer, do you blame them for chargebacks?

If anyone files a chargeback, D will be blacklisting them from every company they rep, as in blacklisting you from buying direct from those companies. I urge everyone who has negative experiences with D to email the companies they rep instead of venting on confession blogs, and writing your experiences on social media. Make it count and send letters to the companies they represent, and please provide proof because they will try to make you out to be a liar.

Speaking of, they made vague posts on cl0ver singing for charging paypal fees, and that they offer guarantees as an official dealer, except when offering refunds, to non delivered products I might add, they are keeping the fees, and offered no help with d0llshe, even before they ended their dealership with them. Someone on DOA was told to not email them unless the wait time surpassed 1.5 years. They are even so petty that they post screenshots with the full name and address (dox) of the customer on purpose and then delete it out a day later as if they just realized their "mistake".

Before you try to make excuses for them about the fires, keep in mind, I am dealing with a business. The lower price negotiation with the DOA sale, I am in no way obligated to give them a pass or treat them as a friend when they made it clear that our relationship is strictly business. Their issues, are not my issues. D0lk got dragged for not shipping in time, others, including artisans, got dragged for being so late with communication and sending back refunds for cancelled orders. Why does D get to be exempt?

The supporters are the worst part of this, because of instead of being honest so D can improve, they support them for being "real". For example, look how micemage words it, to make it seem like this criticism is from one person, when there are people on addicts who didn’t have good experience. Check the bjd dealers tag here, you will see the supporters in the comments going off on any and all criticism of D. Some have sane comments, but the majority are cult like and try to identify the person venting as if it’s one person. Addicts deletes threads with criticism asking people to instead direct it to their feedback group; which lets be honest, no one is going to do because its "not that bad", and most dont want to join a new group, which is mostly dead.

This is my first and last confession on D, I’ve emailed each company they rep and told them my experience as well as contacting the 3 month wait company, with screenshots of my order, how they handled it, and the excuse they used to put blame on the company for being so late (package arrived march to D, 4 months to be shipped is on D, not the company). I’m not using company or order details because I know they are petty enough to try to identify me and publicly shame me like they have to others. This and the threat of suing is why not many people like to go public with their experience. They just keep feedback neutral, move on and never deal with again.

~Anonymous

6. Listen, I can't take you seriously in regards to BJD!vas because you're posting on a confession blog. If you were serious, you would have posted in buyer beware groups, DoA reviews or the board to get things resolved, or you would have made a complaint to the BBB. And your language makes you come off more as someone with an agenda rather than someone who is trying to warn people. If shipping is the issue, stop buying with standard shipping and pay the extra price for express shipping. I saw one of you complain that it sat with them for 20 days; that's probably because you're not the only one and they more than likely have a queue to check and then ship out. Do mistakes happen? Yes, because we're human. I've been in this hobby for a few years now and it seems like most people know you're going to have to wait, sometimes even outside the expected wait time. And shipping something as big as a doll is a timely endeavor. I shouldn't have to say that.

My point is simply to stop complaining on an confession board and either take it to the places previously mentioned. Posting here behind the anonymous mask makes you sound like a petulant child who didn't get their way right away.

~Anonymous

7.My only issue with BJD Divaz is how I never get any updates. Every email, they tell me to join their facebook page for status updates. I dont have a FB and I dont want to create one. I bought my doll through their website, updates should be posted on their website, or they could send me an email. That isnt asking much.

~Anonymous

8. Since there seems to be a lot of either "completely negative everything sucks" or "everything was sunshine and rainbows" confessions about bjd!vaz I thought I'd chime in with a neutral review.

PROS

-They were always polite and professional in their emails, and gave me very detailed answers to my questions.

-I got exactly what I ordered, so no mix ups or missing parts or anything like that.

-I think them being forthcoming about personal issues (only one person on staff, illness, the flooding isue etc.) on social media is good, since it keeps customers updated as to why there might be delays.

-If you live in the US their shipping is very reasonable.

CONS

-Reply times were varied. Sometimes it could take over a week, sometimes a couple hours.

-My order took about 10mo which, when comparing to other people who ordered through the same company around the same time, was about 3x as long as if I bought it direct and 2x as long if I had gone through a different dealer. I get some of the waiting time is out of their control, but it was kind of ridiculous.

-They dont necessarily ship the same day they send you a tracking number. I wish they said something like, "Here's your tracking number, our pickup is Xday so it should start moving after that" just so I could be aware.

All in all no major complaints. I got my doll and all that. Their lone employee is clearly overwhelmed. I hope they hire another person, if only to give the one a break.

Truthfully, I most likely won't buy through them again. I'd rather pay the international shipping and go direct, than deal with the extensive wait time. I'd still recommend them to someone looking for a very long layaway, though. I paid in full, but if I had a 12mo layaway I would've never known they weren't ready to ship my doll until month 10.

~Anonymous

#BJD #ABJD #BJD Confessions #TrueBJDConfessions #BJD Dealers

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askaceattorney · 3 years

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Dear Anonymous,

Mod Edgeworth: We might consider this idea, though I’m already kinda doing something at the moment.

Speaking of which, doing this Let’s Play is proving to be much more time consuming than I had anticipated. Playing is the easy part, but the hard part is the editing. We will still be accepting letters by the time I upload the Let’s Play, but it will be uploaded in pieces and it is likely that I won’t end up finishing the entire game until the end of September. That will depend on my own pace. I do apologize for this.

Co-Mod: I like that idea, but we’re not to that point just yet. We’ll keep it in mind, though!

Dear Anonymous,

Co-Mod:

Oh, yeah -- for those who didn’t read this, I’ve decided to make this my final year as an official Ask Ace Attorney Mod. It’s been a blast, and I’m grateful for the fun we’ve been able to share all these years. I could go on, but I gotta save some for the grand finale.

And thanks for the good luck. I’ll take it.

(Previous Letter)

Dear Anonymous,

Mod Edgeworth: Um.... I guess it does, but it doesn’t? Let me explain.

If you’re talking about the letter breaking the 4th wall, because this was sent to Kay about having someone as the Yatagarasu over a decade before AA6, that... doesn’t count? Kay never has met with Apollo and still doesn’t know him. Even if Kay were around during the events of AA6, the events there take place in a different country. She may have close contact with Edgeworth, but that isn’t to say she’d know or would ever know, since the events took place in a different country and we don’t know if the News was world wide. The answer would remain the same no matter how you paint it.

In order for a letter to break the 4th wall, there has to be indication of a character being sent information of things that would not be possible for them to know, unless they knew they lived in a fictional world. Some rando telling Kay that Apollo defeats a tyrannical ruler in another country isn’t information that she isn’t supposed to know in another decade, since she likely would never know when it did happen.

Now, we do sometimes answer letters that do break the rules. Some will either try to break the 4th wall (like trying to inform Trucy or Apollo that they’re siblings when they don’t even know in canon) or change canon in some ways. We often answer them by having the canon characters either deny any change in canon or having the letter be hijacked by someone else (such as having Phoenix answer a letter to Trucy revealing Apollo is her brother). In some cases where a letter has found a loophole somewhere (like the letter you provided), we will accept them and treat them like any other letter. Believe it or not, we do try to answer letters when we can. It’s only when someone breaks the rules in a letter to a point where the letter becomes unanswerable. If we can answer it, we will whether it breaks the rules or not. Any consiquences should match the crime.

Co-Mod: TL;DR -- The letter didn’t break logic or canon, so it’s still pretty much within the rules.

(Previous Letter)

Mod Edgeworth: Ah, I see. Tumblr didn’t show that image. Still, we don’t accept the Ace Attorney anime. It would have been deleted, had the image shown. Much like the mangas and live action movie, the anime made so many changes to canon. I’m still salty about that. Why the hell did the anime make it canon for Edgeworth to be Manfred Von Karma’s adopted son... but focus on him and Franziska.

I WANT MORE MANFRED VON KARMA AND EDGEWORTH! WHY WON’T YOU GIVE ME ANY!?!

Dear Dawsongfg,

Mod Justice: Let me show you Exhibit A, then. Look at the top of the post.

If the other mods don’t care about these, then fine. But don’t use this or anything of the sort against me, or else...

I just might unleash Hokuto Shin Ken on your ass.

HA! Okay, I admit this bluff.

(Previous Post)

Dear dawsongfg,

Mod Edgeworth: I don’t, but... eh, can’t make Tumblr do shit for you. I’d just stick to sending links to images. You can repeat the same letter with the image, if you’d like.

Co-Mod: I don’t have much of an answer for that question, anyway.

(Previous Letter)

Dear Shoe,

Mod Edgeworth:

You’d be playing a different toon, if your owner said that to a dog. That’s all of gonna say.

Co-Mod: Please... My own cat thinks I’m her pillow.

(Previous Post)

Dear Dawsongfg,

Mod Edgeworth: You’d be surprised.

Co-Mod: Yep, it’s just “ohayōgozaimasu” (Japanese for “good night”) split into two words and reversed. I guess that’s still technically an anagram, but just barely.

(Previous Post)

Dear dawsongfg,

Co-Mod: I’m not into that sort of thing, if that’s what you’re suggesting, and, uh...do you need a reboot?

(Referenced Letters)

Dear dawsongfg,

Co-Mod: Boom.

(The world will never know.)

Dear Anonymous,

Mod Edgeworth: Thank you.

Co-Mod:

(Previous Post)

Dear dawsongfg,

Mod Edgeworth: Depends.

Co-Mod: I try to post them no more than 3 weeks between each other (emphasis on “try”). Sorry for falling so far behind on them, by the way! I’m currently doing some catchup work on them.

If I were in the Ace Attorney world, I’d probably snap some photos of Athena look for a position at Blue Screens, Inc., find a nice house in the suburbs, stop by Eldoon’s every now and then, and make a checklist of how many familiar locations and people I could find. Oh, and I’d grab some Grilliam’s on weekends, too. We can count that in even though it’s just the Mod’s headcanon, right?

And please leave Susato alone. This ain’t no Danganronpa.

(Previous Letter)

Dear dawsongfg and Moe fan,

Co-Mod: I don’t get it.

(Referenced Letter)

Dear Anonymous,

Mod Edgeworth: Yes, Springtime did use letter formatting. Using sprites and pictures do not go against letter formatting.

As for the altering game canon, that isn’t altering game canon. The Von Karma family members were based off of canon (Manfred Von Karma mentioned having a wife in The Inherited Turnabout and granddaughter that is 7 in Turnabout Goodbyes, indicating that he does have a wife and other children that are Franziska’s older sibling(s), unless you think Franziska shacked up with someone and got pregnant at age 10). Gregory Edgeworth being Chief of Police happened before Miles was born, and quite when Miles was a newborn before becoming a Defense Attorney when Miles was 3. There’s no indication in canon if Gregory was a Defense Attorney before Miles was born or not and, yes, there are Defense Attorneys that previously worked as Prosecutors or officers of the law. The only rule Youngbounty (she outted herself as the writer of those letters in the reblogs publicly) broke was giving these characters names, which we did respond by having Manfred Von Karma call Martha “Wife” and his children “Son” or “Daughter,” but nothing worth deleting.

From the way you’re acting, you’re making a mountain out of a mole hill. And yes, you are being very rude to Springtime and Youngbounty. Please don’t insult or mock our fans. It’s fine to report any concerns, but you have to keep in mind that your letters will be made public and we will not tolerate any form of mockery or insults towards real life people. Just because you think they’re breaking the rules, that doesn’t mean they are. Just because we answer letters that are breaking the rules, that doesn’t mean they are not getting any consequences. In this case, neither of them broke any rules and Youngbounty did receive consequences for breaking the rule of giving these unnamed established characters names, which I find to be too small of potatoes at best.

Co-Mod: Agreed. I’d also like to point out that, since we have the characters respond with “letters” in which they talk out loud, we think it’s only fair to let the submitters do the same. Don’t ask how it’s supposed to work.

Dear Anonymous,

Mod Edgeworth: Beats me.

Co-Mod: It’s impossible. You can only accept your defeat.

(Previous Letter)

Dear dawsongfg,

Co-Mod: First off, that sprite was made by the Mod, so if you’re going to send an assassin after anyone, it should be him. Second, your guess is as good as mine as to why everyone thought Furio was the real deal. It so happens the Mod once had a theory about that, but we’ll never know for sure.

Third, to answer your question about shippers: Apparently so, smart-aleck.

Mod Edgeworth: I don’t ship Phoenix and Maya or Phoenix and Iris.

Dear Anonymous,

NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE

SOOOO MUUUUUCH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPE!!!!!!!!

Mod Edgeworth: Hm... on one hand, the idea is creepy, but then again, the idea that Oldbag would fall for someone that looks and has a crush on the one she is crushing on sounds hilarious. Hm...

If the other guys chicken out, I’ll accept it.

Co-Mod: You do, and I’ll Sosuns the both of you.

Dear Dawsongfg,

Mod Edgeworth: The better question is why you’re asking us about that old fart.

Nah, that would never happen, because why use Oldbag when I can send my army of cockroaches to conquer the world. Oldbag can just die from the millions of cockroaches crawling into her nose, eye sockets and ears before using them to blackmail Capcom into making me my own Edgeworth statue in my front yard.

IT MUST BE DONE!!

Co-Mod: Dang, I never realized I was that diabolical.

Dear gfgnoswad,

Co-Mod: Can I? Yes.

Dear Manfred Von Karma,

Mod Edgeworth: Mail for you and can I try one of your wife’s cookies?

Mod Edgeworth: If you’re meaning the most tragic villain, I’d say Simon Keyes. Though, the one that has caused the most tragedy is no doubt Ga’ran.

Co-Mod: Simon Keyes is my first choice as well, being both a culprit and a victim. In terms of morals, he’s no better than the average crook, but you do still have to feel sorry for his situation. I also feel some sympathy for Mimi. Losing your job, car, and sister all at once may not justify murder or framing, but it still has to be a heavy load to bear. Tahrust Inmee also comes to mind, as I mentioned once before. If I had a wife and child whose lives were in jeopardy, there isn’t much I wouldn’t do to save them.

Dear Anonymous,

Mod Edgeworth: How is the Proto Badger scary? I found a talking plant from Little Shop of Horrors much more scary.

Co-Mod: I repeat myself, but blame the Mod.

Dear Anonymous,

Mod Edgeworth: No, you didn’t.

Co-Mod: That is one...big...“whoops”!

Dear Anonymous,

Co-Mod: Um... Are you sure it’s vinegar?

(Referenced Essay)

Dear Anonymous,

Mod Edgeworth: I searched in all devices. It works on my laptop and browser on my phone just fine, but doesn’t show from my tumblr app. I don’t know the reason for this or how to fix it. This was not an issue before, so it’s likely Tumblr’s doing.

I apologize for this.

Dear Anonymous,

Mod Edgeworth: Only two of us just started, but the compliment is appreciated.

Co-Mod: Hey, asks are back! : D

And yeah, I’m surprised, too. It’s all thanks to the awesome Ace Attorney community that we’re able to continue, so right back atcha!

Dear Dawsongfg,

Mod Edgeworth: Well, Co-Mod, it’s been nice knowing ya.

If you excuse me, I’m going to be plotting my future engagement with a fictional character named Miles Edgeworth.

Co-Mod: Whippersnappers.

Dear Anonymous and dawnsongfg,

Mod Edgeworth: What you both mean to say is that you can’t English.

Co-Mod:

(Source)

Dear ATheComputerTechnician,

Co-Mod: Nope, go right ahead! I’ve been waiting for someone to do that for a long time, actually. Heck, I’d do it myself if I had the vocal talent for it. Thanks for asking!

(Woo-hoo, publicity!)

-The Mods

#Anonymous #athecomputertechnician #Mod Post #Mod Edgeworth #Co Mod #Mod Commentary #Please never cram that many letters together again Mods o_0 #Sorry :(

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heart-forge · 3 years

Note

Hi! Just wondering why you stopped using CoG? I may be remembering wrong but I remember Bad Ritual coded in the choicescript format (I definitely think it's how I found you?). I'm thinking of publishing a choicescript game, so I was wondering what made you stop using it. It's okay if you don't want to answer! I know this might be a bit intrusive. Thank you for your time!

Oh no you’re absolutely good !!! First off, you’re correct and BR was a CoG game. It started as a Twine game but I broke up with Twine for a little while so I switched it to CoG because it seemed decently popular and easy to use. And it is !! And was !!

Ultimately I switched to Twine because:

1) I really didn’t like the format. The list of options thing bothered me, because I had already figured out in-line choices (like BR has now) and that always felt more immersive to me. It was one of those “I know all the other authors are doing it this way and I don’t care when they do it, but when I do it, it drives me up the wall”.

2) I couldn’t post BR anywhere besides the forum. I tried, and mods quickly intervened.

2.1) The forum bothered me. My topic would only stay open for six months, and I’ve never been able to do this full time and so a six month time frame for updates was deeply unrealistic and seemed to discourage interaction to me. I had a link to my Tumblr, which allowed people to keep engaging with it (which is what I would recommend), but if I had relied on the forum then I would have to keep bumping it open or nudging mods to reopen it (mods that I didn’t know how to contact at all).

2.2) Forum etiquette was well established and it felt like every time I posted, I was doing something weird at best. At worst, I was interacting with an audience that I felt I had a truly minimal idea of how to moderate and weirdy enough, I felt I had to moderate more closely than I did on Tumblr (Tumblr notably has a posting etiquette that I’m more familiar with, and more comfortable engaging with). This isn’t to say that it was a bad experience, but when I felt like I was being confronted in a strangely aggressive way, something I rarely experience on other platforms, I had no real idea what to do about it besides delete it (which long time followers will know I usually reserve for people being Problematic). I prefer on here where I can just more articulately explain what issues I have with the dialogue.

3) As I got closer and closer to finishing my programming degree, and therefore more comfortable with doing my own programming, I wanted to be able to do that. CoG doesn’t allow for as much personalization as just being able to adjust my own CSS has, which is also why I’m extremely dedicated to being as accessible as possible because a lot of people did hop over from the very accessible CoG platform.

4) I don’t like revenue sharing, especially in situations where a company gets more than I do for...creating the content. Content they would not have to profit off of...if not for me. Now, this isn’t an unusual arrangement, me calling CoG a scam, or even advice to other people. I just don’t like it. It frustrates me, because I just...don’t understand the benefit to me. I do all the work and get a lesser share, dictated by the company unlike itch who lets me pick. There’s the marketing angle, but also like...I haven’t seen a degree of marketing done by Hosted Games that impressed to me that it was worth it. Ultimately the biggest benefit I could see was the programming support and hosting. Coding CoG is easy, largely straightforward, and well documented, and they will host your game. That’s definitely a huge benefit !! But not to me, who wasn’t satisfied with the limitations of the code and was perfectly happy to just release an APK with a tutorial on how to use it if necessary.

Now again, keep in mind that just because I couldn’t see them doesn’t mean the benefits aren’t there. Hosted Games like Wayhaven and Fallen Hero are insanely popular and their audiences far outstrip mine. The best people to ask about the benefits of CoG and Hosted Games are people who saw their partnership all the way through.

Ultimately my decision was specifically because I couldn’t cross post the demo and couldn’t see myself dedicating the same amount of energy to the forum as I wanted to dedicate to Tumblr.

#talkForge #Anonymous

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mcytblraufest · 2 years

Text

General Info

If you have not received your gift and a mod hasn’t already been in contact with you about an extension, please contact someone on the mod team.

TIMELINE: ☑ Applications close May 31 ☑ Assignments sent out June 8 - June 14 ☑ Check-in July 30 - July 1 ☑ Gifts posted July 15 - July 22

RULES FOR PARTICIPATING: - Must have DMs open - Must tag your recipient in the eventual post - DM us ASAP if you don’t think you’ll get your gift out on time or at all/want to withdraw

RULES FOR CREATING: - Must put the characters in an AU, no canon-compliance - Respect Creator Boundaries - Your gift doesn’t have to contain only requested characters, but it does have to centre on at least one requested character. - Any creator-respecting shipping must be kept to PG-13 or below, no NSFW - Dark or Violent themes must be tagged appropriately

CREATING RESOURCES: - How to add your fic to an Ao3 Collection. [link] - The Ao3 Collection. [link] - How to image-describe your art. [link1] [link2]

MINIMUM REQUIREMENTS: - Art (1 drawing, created to a standard you would normally post as “finished”) - Writing (1k+ words) - Playlist (hour long playtime) - Moodboard (2 boards) - Web Weaving (2 boards)

MISC: - If you tag this blog as well, we’ll RB your gift here! - You will not necessarily be matched with someone who matches your ‘willing to create about’ exactly. The goal is to have multiple matches, but in cases of more obscure requests you might be matched with someone who only has one commonality between your ‘willing to create’ and their wish list. In that case at least you know what to make your gift around pretty quickly. :D - Please send asks if you need information. If it is something you do not feel comfortable sending in an ask, you can message us at @antimony-medusa or @droidofmay. - If you ask us a question about something that has been already outlined in this post we will not answer!

FAQ:

-I changed my mind about my gift list, I want to add something, what do I do? You can re-do your entry and we will delete the earlier version of any duplicate entries, or you send us an ask (off anon if you want an answer back) to change something (only minor changes using this method, please).

-Is there an Ao3 collection? I want to add my fic to it. Yes there is! It is titled “MCYTBLR AU Fest Summer 2022″ and the link is here.

-I added my fic to the Ao3 collection, but I can’t see it? The collection is currently set to ‘unrevealed’, so works can be added but won’t be visible before reveal day, so it’s all a surprise.

-I want to image-describe my art, but I’ve never done that before? The excellent @fearforthestorm has volunteered to help people write image-descriptions, as long as that isn’t everyone calling them up on the final day before posting. Image-descriptions are not required, but helps to make Tumblr (and the gift exchange) accessible to more people, so it’s a lovely thing to do.

-I need to contact my recipient, but they have anon off! What do I do? Talk to us, we’ll contact them for you.

- I didn’t save my assignment message and now I’ve forgotten my assignment, what now? Get in contact with us, we’ll resend it.

-I can't finish my gift by the deadline, what do I do? You have two options. Option one is to consider if you can still finish it by a couple days or a week or so later, and ask the mods if you can get an extension. We will check with your recipient to see if it's okay to extend your deadline. Option two is to drop entirely, in which case you tell a mod, and we will assign your gift to a pinch-hitter so your recipient still gets something. In both cases, the important thing is that you get in contact with a mod ( @antimony-medusa or @droidofmay ) as soon as possible to figure out a plan.

[Previously Answered Questions]

#FAQ #mcytblr au fest #Posting Help

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little-red-toyota · 3 years

Text

Final good bye to the fandom

TW//Trauma, triggers, nsfw, sexual themes, rape, domestic abuse e.g.

This is gonna be a long ass post…

It has taken me a while to get emotionally strong enough to do this, as I will have to think back at some traumatic events from my past to address some of these things. That's why I waited until I got home from vacation with my family, as it will seriously affect my mood and mental health, and I want to be near my doctor and therapist, just in case.

And also, I know that the majority of those reading this will invalidate me and tell me I am making things up to clear my name. So, I literally have to torment myself to write a blog post people will just brush off as bogus anyway. But I will do it now that I am in safe surroundings. Then it will be off my chest, and I can finally move on. If people will continue stirring up the past, it will be their problem, not mine.

I think I should write one last blog post where I address everything. I have left the TTTE-fandom, but I will write that one as my final goodbye to the fandom. I just have to find out everything I've been accused of so I can properly address them all in order. I might leave out details of my life that is too hard for me to open up about. I know most of you will just invalidate me anyway.

1. The Stepney fic and glorifying rape.

2. My mafia-AU.

3. The Darin incident.

4. Being a pedophile. (Where do they get this from anyway??)

5. Running the NSFW-blog.

6. Drawing penises/boobs on trains. Drawing age-regression art.

Is there more?

Ah... yes! Faking my own suicide, of course!

7. "Faking" being suicidal.

8. Having the audacity to survive and go on living.

9. "Making up" my past trauma to justify writing fics to cope with it.

10. Being a nazi for being interested in WW2 history and for being Norwegian and having so-called nazi-letters in my last name (actual letters of the Norwegian alphabet).

11. Putting a white-supremacist flag (the actual flag of Norway) on my porch on family birthdays and our national day.

12. Being a danger to my daughter.

Anything else that needs to be addressed? What else am I being accused of? Send me a dm and I will add it to the post.

Okay, I will bump the Stepney fic down a bit as it is the most traumatic thing for me to address, I will save that one for last.

2 and 3. The dark au/mafia au where I gave some TTTE characters some rather dark and unpleasant character traits, and the whole incident with Darin and the pedo-Salty was addressed in this blog post written by my husband last year, so I am not opening that can of worms again: https://little-red-toyota.tumblr.com/post/623743183795470336/in-light-of-recent-events

Even the thing about Toby cheating on Henrietta is addressed there.

As for the au, I never fully explored it as I started losing interest in TTTE around the same time. I found other things to enjoy and TTTE faded into the background and the au was dropped before I even wrote any stories, apart from the one about Toby and Henrietta.

Some people claim, like this lovely individual, that most of the characters were rapists and pedos. No, not most. Only one of each. And I did not write more than one story about rape and suicide. Where does this person even get that from? Someone who told someone who had heard from someone who might have heard….?

Don't spread rumors unless you are sure that they are true.

Anyway, it's all addressed in that blog post in that link. I don't see how this mafia au is any worse than other dark post-apocalyptic or violent aus. It mostly was about the diesel mafia and their illegal businesses, not about sex, even if it did occur now and then. I find the substance abuse in it to be more problematic tbh…

4. Being a pedophile.

I don't even know how to defend myself against this one, as I don't even know why people think I am pedophile. They only throw the accusation out with no backing evidence, so I have no idea where it comes from or what it is that makes people think I am one.

Apart from one claim that I had faved "porn" alongside "strangers'" baby photos on DA. I addressed that earlier though. As DeviantArt doesn't sort what you click "like" on, it all ends up in the same folder unless you actively go through it and sort it into categories, which I don't bother most of the time. It also doesn't say WHEN it was added to your faves. So, I can have faved an artistic nude on Saturday, and then faved my friend's family photo on Thursday. It's not like I actively search for porn, get all steamed up and then look at pictures of children. WTF.

The few children I have faved are not from complete strangers, but long-term friends of mine. Yes, it is possible to have friends on the same website. I have actually met a lot of my RL friends through DeviantArt. I posted photos of my daughter when she was a baby, they would fave it and congratulate me. So, I did the same when they had a baby. As simple as that. Nothing weird or perverted about it. Due to people doxxing me last year however, I deleted the photos of me, my husband and my daughter from DeviantArt, so it's no longer there.

Porn isn't allowed on DeviantArt anyway. The nudes there are so-called artistic nudes, and for the most part I use them as pose-references when I draw as it is easier to draw a pose using a nude base and then dress them up once you got the pose right.

"The very naked" centaurs I have faved. Well, I like the mythological creature Centaur. And as far as I know… they do not wear clothes, so how are they NOT nude? Look it up, it's a horse body with a human torso instead of horse head. I don't see them as sexual, but what do I know? Maybe YOU do?

I have no sexual interest in children whatsoever.

5. Running the NSFW-blog on Tumblr and Twitter.

Yes. I was one of six people modding that blog. ONE of six, so I refuse to take the full blame here.

MerciResolution has openly admitted to being the founder, and she recruited me and some others to modify as the confession load became too heavy for one person to handle alone.

The original blog on Tumblr worked as follows: People would anonymously send a confession to our askbox, we would add a picture (sometimes photoshopped) to the text and post it on the blog. Always tagged as NSFW and with proper trigger warnings if necessary! The blog itself was also marked as explicit, so it didn't appear in searches and such.

For us, this blog was nothing but a joke. We did it for shits and giggles. If anyone took it seriously and thought we got off to the stuff that was posted, we apologize for that, but to us it was just for laughs. And we DID laugh a lot, you guys should have seen the weird shit people sent us sometimes!

We had fun and we never thought anyone would take it seriously, so we never thought of writing "joke" in the description or anything. It never occurred to us that it could be anything but a joke.

We also made a Twitter account for it, also locked for minors. But it was quickly hacked, and someone changed the password so we could no longer access it. We made another account and forgot about the old one…

After a while, the original mods started losing interest and the blog (both on Tumblr and Twitter) became less active. That's when a person I had known for years, and wrongfully trusted, came forward and wanted to take over ownership. So, the ownership was handed over to Russalita/Charlie.

That turned out to be huge mistake!

Me and the other mods had more or less forgotten that the blogs existed, when suddenly someone started bashing me and getting up in my arms over it. I got seriously confused as I hadn't been active on it in almost a year. But as it turned out, Russalita had removed the mature filters and made the accounts open for all the see. Even minors.

And as people knew I was one of the mods, they fired their guns at me. I can see why though, so I'm not pointing any fingers here.

I tried contacting her by phone, asking her to lock the accounts again, but she gave me a less than polite response, hung up and then blocked my number…

So, I decided to try to shut the blogs down on my own, trying the old passwords. It worked on the Tumblr-account, and I managed to password protect it, for some reason it couldn't be fully deleted. But the Twitter account had gotten its password changed by Russalita. I was however able to get a new password by logging into the e-mail we had used to create it. I deleted the Twitter blog fully. It can't be re-activated even if we wanted to. It's gone.

But it turns out the old, hacked one is still up and now open for everyone. And this one poses a huge problem as we have no way of getting into it to delete it. Only thing we have been able to do so far is reporting it and hope it will be removed by Twitter. So I only have one thing to say about it: report it.

I am no longer running any NSFW TTTE blog anywhere, nor do I have interest in doing so. So, if you come across one, claiming to be me or any of the other mods, it is false.

6. Drawing penises/boobs on trains. Drawing age-regression art.

People seem to believe I have drawn genitals on trains. I have never done such. Any art on the NSFW-blog with genitalia on the trains were sent in by confessors and was not drawn by me. Most of them seems to have been drawn by someone who goes by the name "The Lance".

I HAVE drawn things for the NSFW blog, but there were no genitalia in those drawings. I drew Frank of Arlesdale looking grossed out by (I don't know what the part is named in English, but it is connected to the brakes of the engine) that stick-like thing on his bufferbeam being wet from whatever the confessor did to him. I drew an over-exaggerated comical pic of a horrified Peter Sam getting his face licked by his driver, who had an enormous tongue. I also did a couple of manips. Mostly maniping engine faces on humans, like the one where Gordon's face is on a less than fit guy flailing his shirt around, and the Arlesdale smallies' faces on a movie poster from Magic Mike. One with Mr.Conductor in a giant bun while Pinchy is applying ketchup on him, for a confession about eating him, I think? I've done some more, but I forgot what it was, I only know I loved making them comical rather than erotic, as I saw the blog as a joke overall.

I HAVE also drawn aheago faces on engines because it looks hilarious. Though I have only drawn them on my OCs and the NRS engines, not TTTE characters.

Point is I have never drawn genitalia on trains. Ever. And I likely never will. It's not THAT much fun drawing NSFW stuff.

I see from this screenshot that a certain MK-Instrumentalist claim that all my personal art is age-regression art and infantilism…

Whose art have you been looking at? Because it's definitely not mine. I have drawn a couple of baby/chibi diesels… But claiming that all of my 700 or so artworks are depicting infantilism and age-regression stuff? I suggest people go have a look for themselves. I haven't drawn that. That MK-guy has been desperately trying to cancel me for ages for reasons only himself know. I don't even know the guy, and he doesn't know me, yet he wants to see me beheaded. Go figure.

I was for a long time bothered by some age-regressor on Tumblr who just wouldn't leave me alone with their weird asks, who tried to force themselves on me and some other artists here. They claim age-regression isn't a fetish, but the shit they sent to my askbox certainly looked like a fetish to me.

I don't want anything to do with that stuff. It weirds me out.

And no. I have never drawn pedophilia or rape art either. This guy can't even make up his mind on which one to accuse me of.

7 and 8. Faking suicide and having the audacity to survive and go on living.

As many know, after the intense shitstorm against me last summer, thanks to Darin, I attempted suicide. I didn't succeed as my husband came home early. I was gone for a few days but returned when a young boy reached out to me for help as he was being groomed and didn't know who else to turn to.

Recently I saw a screenshot where someone claimed me to have faked suicide, and that I just came back after a few days when everything had died down.

Wow.

I am truly sorry I survived.

I don't remember much from those days to be honest, but as the load became too heavy and the bullying too intense, piling up on 30 years of old trauma… I decided to end it. I must warn you guys who might get triggered now; there are detailed descriptions of a suicide attempt. Proceed with caution. People told me I was a bad mother among other things, having had those same thoughts myself (according to my husband, I am a good mom) and people just confirming them, I thought that my daughter would be better off growing up without me. I could have chosen a more effective suicide method, but I was afraid my daughter would be the first to find me, so I wanted it to be clean and look like I was just sleeping. That way it could be explained as natural causes.

So, I decided to overdose on pills. I downed all pills I could find in the house that had a warning triangle on it (strong pain meds etc.) and then went to my computer to delete my online existence, especially the personal data.

As a former paramedic, I should have known better. Because after half an hour, my body started reacting. But not the way I had hoped and wanted. I started retching and almost vomiting. That's when my husband came home from work and found me. He immediately saw the empty packages and knowing my past suicidal tendencies, he reacted instinctively. He put his fingers down my throat and had me puke everything up, then he called an ambulance and had me admitted to the hospital.

I don't remember anything from the days I spent there. But I have been told they emptied my stomach and gave me lots of fluids. I was then assigned a psychiatrist which I am still seeing today.

I was gone for those days because I was in hospital, not because I was pulling some kind of trick and pretending to have ended myself.

So… I am sorry I "faked" my suicide.

I'm sorry my husband saved me. I am sorry the medics and doctors succeeded in saving my life.

I am sorry I survived and proceeded to live on. If I ever make another attempt, I promise to do better.

Why are you guys so persistent in trying to push people to suicide anyway? Do you get a kick out of it? Why do people have to be pushed to that point before you care?

What did we tell our daughter? Simply that I got sick and had to go to the hospital. She took that well.

I've seen a lot of people wonder why I am still around. Why shouldn't I? Does my daughter deserve to lose her mother over some online crap she doesn't even know about? I owe her to live and watch her grow up, to help her with her homework and whatever else a parent needs to do. I also owe my husband to stay by his side, like I promised him the day we got married. Even if I do not wish to live.

I'm sorry I survived, guys. Really, I am.

9. "Making up" my past trauma to justify writing fics to cope with it. And 1. The Stepney fic and glorifying rape.

First… why would anyone make up trauma? It's not like it's a competition to have the worst life, is it?

Sadly, I don't have to make up anything. My life HAS been rocky up until the birth of my daughter. I have been through so much trauma I couldn't even fathom it myself before my therapist listed it all up to me. Until then, I had just been casually talking to her about it, like I would talk about the weather. I didn't cry or get in touch with my emotions even once while telling everything, because I was taught from an early age to never complain, to suck it up and go on. So, no matter what people did to me, I would just smile and go on, even if it killed me inside. I did not want to show any sign of weakness, because then they would attack me. A habit I developed through years of being bullied in school. Never show feelings, just pretend nothing could hurt you, then they would eventually grow tired of it and stop.

Except they never did. They kept going through all my years at school. To such an extent, my boyfriend didn't dare to show himself hanging out with me out of fear of being bullied himself… And as we grew older, he would start cheating on me too. And I kept smiling…

My next boyfriend was a bit older than me, and while that didn't bother me, as we were both well over legal age, it bothered him. We only lasted one year before he bailed out and ditched me out of the blue via an sms.

The next guy… was the one who scarred me for life. Both physically and mentally. A charmer at first of course, until I was trapped. He was unemployed, so he moved in with me, and I paid for everything from food to phone bills. All while he was dating several women behind my back, calling various pay-phone services and in general acted like a manwhore. As I worked as an electrician (also being subject to massive bullying and sexual harassment at work), he would be jealous of all my co-workers and if I ever came home late or worked overtime, he accused me of cheating and was extremely violent about it. He would also isolate me from my friends and family, making me think I couldn't get any other than him. If any of my male friends (almost all my friends are male…) came over, he would give me such hell afterwards, it was easier just to tell them it was a bad time to visit. And after a while, they stopped asking. This guy also demanded sex. Every single day. If I refused, he would punish me, mostly by flogging me with lampcords, belts or whatever else he had at hand. My back is a criss cross map of old, faded scars even now nearly 20 years later. I would have shown you a photo, but I am so self-concious about my body after all the bullying, I hardly even show my face in photos. Maybe one day… but I certainly need more therapy before being able to show naked skin to strangers, even if it's just my back. So I had non-consensual sex with him more often than consensual. It has taken me hours in therapy to even take the word in my mouth and call it by its proper name: rape. I was raped, almost every single day for little over a year, before I found the strength to break out of the relationship and finally throw him out of my house. It all ended when I found some revealing texts on his cellphone, which he was extremely protective of… Texts that revealed that he had engaged in a relationship with a 12 year old girl, and it had been going on for a while. Not only was he cheating on me, but he was a pedophile too. Needless to say, I didn't even let him pack his stuff before I fetched my shotgun and chased him out of the house. I don't know where I got the courage and strength from… but I was furious.

I thought I had gotten rid of him, but no. He started stalking me in public. Hiding behind shelves when I was shopping, his car following mine everywhere I went. I received weird letters in the mail with cut-out letters from newspapers, glued together. On top of all, his creepy, old uncle called me with some rather disgusting suggestions and tried to come on to me really hard. I had to change my phone number, and after coming home to my house and finding out someone had entered my home using a key, only to empty the drawer of my night table, I also had to change the locks of my doors as he had clearly copied the key.

He didn't stop until I got the police involved.

So, when I finally met the guy who would become my husband (or rather, we found out we were made for each other, we had known each other since we were 11 years old), I had major trust issues towards men especially and it took him endless patience and love to break me out of that shell.

But the trauma doesn't stop… or start there.

In the year 2000, on January 4th, I would experience something that made me unable to even look at a train for over 10 years. The Åsta accident (google it). I was a volunteer in the Norwegian Red Cross then, and a paramedic in training. Back then, you were allowed to start training the year you would turn 16. So, I was still 15 when I witnessed the most traumatic event of my life. The day started out calm, we were stocking up the ambulance after delivering a patient to the hospital when we got a call with the code "500", which means "catastrophe". Normally when we get that code it is a rehearsal… so we drove towards the coordinates with the thoughts that this was just an exercise, nothing real… we didn't prepare ourselves mentally… And we ended up in the closest thing to hell I have ever been… The sight of the burning trains, the smells, the sounds, the screaming… I still wake up by nightmares to this day. Though the moment that haunts me the most is when the screaming stopped… because we all knew why… I don't want to go into details, but 19 people died that day. But we also saved 67 people. I try to hold on to that thought. The age limit for starting paramedic training was raised after this, as I wasn't the only one who was too young for an accident of that scale. Today it is 18. A memorial stone has been placed on the site, but I still haven't been able to bring myself to visit it, even if we drive past the site every year on our way to visit family further north in the country. I needed hours of therapy to even be able to ride a train after this. To have gotten to the point where I now volunteer at a heritage railway and is in training to become a driver, is a HUGE step for me. My next goal is to visit the site of the accident.

On to next trauma… A previous employer, a rather large electric company in Norway, whom I worked for 8 years. The first five years were great, we were a close-knit bunch of electricians, and we had a great relationship with the bosses and higher-ups. Our labor union was strong.

It all started changing in 2009 when we got new leaders… and those decided to get rid of everyone who were a member of the union. One by one, they started harassing workers in various ways, trying to get them to quit. In Norway, they need a legal reason to fire you, it's not enough to not like someone. There has to be a good reason to fire someone e.g. theft, neglecting work… Since they didn't have any reasons to fire us, they started making our work lives gradually harder and harder until we would break and find another job. Sadly, one of my co-workers couldn't stand the pressure… He bid us all farewell as normal one Friday and hung himself the following day.. But as I was a girl in a male-dominated profession, I had been taught at an early stage to ignore anything that would hurt me emotionally, just arch my neck and plow through. I kept doing that, despite starting to feel more and more mental and physical pains… even my co-workers pointed out how I was being mistreated before I acknowledged it myself. I tried to tell my boss, but he reacted by treating me worse. So, I went to his boss… and that's when things went to hell. Instead of doing his job and listen, he started harassing me too. He deemed my over-weight a problem, and he started demanding I gave him detailed lists of what I ate and how much I worked out… Completely illegal of course, but by this point I was broken down to the point I thought I was useless and couldn't get another job… so I accepted. He started accusing me of lying about my exercise, so I started training at the gym in the basement at work instead. One day, while I was there, he locked the doors and turned the lights off. There were no windows, no cellphone reception and hardly anyone walking by in that part of the building… I sat there in the pitch dark for 3 hours before I was let back out. I still get badly triggered by narrow, dark rooms and rooms with no windows. To such an extent, I jumped out of a small window on the second floor of a gym when I was in boot camp. I was allowed to train downstairs in the bigger gym with windows on all walls after that incident…

The harassment at work went on for years until I finally snapped, ended up at the hospital and got into therapy for the first time. I don't want to go into depth about what more happened, I just can't… I can't bring myself to write it all. Luckily, I had gotten more education while working, so when I graduated, another company called and gave me an offer I just couldn't refuse. So, I quit my job and never looked back, even if the traumas I suffered there still haunts me to this day.

Sadly, even after switching jobs, now getting a safe job with sane leaders… I started to relax, and that's when all my past trauma came washing over me. And one day, on while driving to work, I had my first serious panic attack. It started as this feeling I used to have at the old company; getting sick to my stomach and having the sense of someone being out to get me… then it developed to breathing problems… and I had to pull the car over. I broke into tears, struggling to breathe, stumbling out of the car to read the logo on its side just to reassure my body and brain that I worked for a different company now and there was no reason for panic. I called my boss and let him know, because he also was a "refugee" from that other company, so he knew what me and several others had gone through. He managed to talk me down enough for me to come to the office to talk to him. That helped.

I got back into therapy. A better therapist this time. But sadly, it got apparent that I could no longer work as an electrician as there was too many triggers. I was diagnosed with PTSD, severe depression, and social anxiety. I'm still working on these and get better slowly.

I have been in therapy for a long time now, and it was my therapist that suggested I wrote fics to cope and "write it out". I tried to make up my own characters for this, but never felt any connection. I was by this time in the TTTE fandom and had met people with similar trauma and pasts like myself, and I started roleplaying with some of them. Me and a girl from UK then agreed to try to rp/co-write a fic to cope with our trauma. We both found it easier to write about pre-established characters we had a connection to, even if it was an au that made it barely recognizable from the original source material. Only the names and some minor things were similar.

That fic was Stepney's Virginity Gets Lost.

Do we regret writing it? No. It helped us write out our traumas and helped us overcome some mental obstacles in out therapy process. Our therapists cheering us on, because we finally managed to break through the hard shell surrounding us. We both cried for the first time in years while writing it, some of it through roleplay, because some parts were extremely graphic and brutal and very mentally exhausting. We had to take long breaks between each writing session, so the fic wasn't written in just a weekend. But we got a lot of darkness out of our minds by writing all this. And we were definitely NOT aroused by it, like this pervert here claims.

It's when you dare to touch and feel the difficult and dark emotions, you can finally move along in the grieving process.

Should it have been posted online?

In retrospect, no. But at the time, we thought it might help other trauma victims, as we also found reading about other people's experiences and fictions touching painful subjects helpful to ourselves. So, we posted it, never expecting it to cause such a controversy 3 years later. In fact, we had more or less forgotten about it until it came back to bit us in the ass. Or rather, bite ME in the ass, as I am getting the full blame alone.

Also, despite what people claim, it was not posted openly for children to read. It was tagged properly and hidden behind mature content walls. If a minor chooses to break that wall, that's not the author's fault. It's the same as watching a movie with an age restriction way above your age, not the filmmaker's fault.

I think MerciResolution puts it nicely here:

"If your problem lies with you KNOWINGLY entering adult spaces when you’re a minor, ignoring all mature warnings that are literally SCREAMING at you “hey, this is what you’re getting into. Are you sure you want to proceed?”

That’s ENTIRELY on you. YOU are the fucking problem.

We’re marking mature things as best as we properly can. If you decide to ignore them, that’s your own damn fault. We’re not your fucking babysitters."

Also, I never posted the story on Wattpad, so if anyone has done that, it's not me. I posted the story on Fanfiction.net, DeviantArt and AO3, that's all. If it's posted anywhere else, it's not done by me.

I had honestly moved on from it when people pulled me back into it.

Other people who have done questionable shit in that fandom are easily forgiven because "they have moved on" or "changed". Yet, nobody believes I can move on or change…?

I had moved on; my interests had changed. But people won't let me, so here I am… Having to defend some crap I did years ago. A fic I no longer have any interest in.

I'm not even interested in TTTE anymore. I have moved on with my own book project now and I would like to focus on that.

So, deleting my TTTE content, whether it was the SFW or NSFW stuff, didn't cost me a penny. It actually felt like a relief. The only downside with it is that people now can't read it and make up their own opinion about it, but will solely believe in what others say, and those things are often seriously bent out of shape and blown out of proportions to such an extent it's barely recognizable.

If people claim that Arry and Bert rape Stepney in the fic, they have never seen it or read it. That's not what happens. That's just an assumption made by looking at the title and knowing there is a rape/torture scene in it. But I'm not gonna tell who the victim is or who performed it, because this is the only way I am able to tell who has actually read the fic or not, who is just trying to spread bullshit and who is actually telling the truth. The person in that screenshot, has no idea what he's talking about.

Does SVGL romanticize rape and abuse?

No, not in the least. It's described as the horrible, heinous acts it is and is in no way meant to be cute or romantic and definitely NOT something anyone should get off to. If anyone finds it sexy, that's their problem, not the authors'. If anything, SVGL might romanticize suicide, because one of the characters isn't able to cope with his trauma and chooses to end their life. Which is something I considered doing myself when I was in the darkest pit of depression. So, I apologize for maybe romanticizing suicide. The following chapters describe how friends and family handle the loss and grief.

It also describes a toxic relationship, where one of the parts struggles to get out of it. They eventually manage to break free, but it is not easy. This can easily be translated to my previously mentioned relationship, as it was my way of writing out my experience about how hard it is to break out of a relation when your partner has broken you down to the point where you no longer believe in yourself and your self-worth.

The last chapters start to gradually become brighter, as both our lives started getting better too. But we never really wrote the end because we both lost interest in writing TTTE content by that time and just left it hanging.

I'm not the only one who has written NSFW TTTE fanfics out there. But it seems like violence and murder is more acceptable than sexual things? I do wonder how brutally mutilating children's show characters are more tolerable than sexually abusing them. Neither should be okay.

Some content creators hide behind "it was a joke". I have been told that such topics that SVGL touches upon shouldn't be joked about… so I didn't do that, and yet it was wrong? So how should such topics be treated? Be hidden like it's a shame, like in the old days when rape victims were told to suck things up and keep it to themselves? When those subject to abuse didn't dare to speak up because people would judge them?

I think it is important to talk about these subjects and why they are so problematic. Victims shouldn't have to hide their trauma; they should be allowed to talk openly about it without fearing judgement.

Some of you claim that writing isn't a good way to cope… You're trying to dictate how trauma victims deal with their trauma, and that's a dangerous path to walk down. Nobody handles trauma the same way. You might have your thoughts on how you would react, but you'll never know until trauma hits you… and you might not react the way you had expected or planned. Trauma messes with your head and you won't be able to think clearly. It makes you do thinks you normally wouldn't have done and can make you act out of character. So, do not judge people without having been in the same situation yourself. Ever.

Someone wrote that I have "more problems that just a rape".

Read that again.

Just a rape.

This person does not know how damaging a rape can be. And if you made it this far in this post, you know I didn't only go through one, but several. Not just by my ex, but also being ambushed while I was walking home from a party, and later; a co-worker forcing himself onto me at a building site. I can't go into depth about them all, I just can't.

Just a rape…

"Just" the feeling of not being in control of your own body and your own decisions. "Just" being robbed off your dignity and self-worth. "Just" having someone intrude into your private zone, tear your clothes off and claim your body against your will. "Just" feeling how your life force leave you as you realize that fighting against it won't help you, and you silently give up and just lay down waiting for it all to be over. "Just" spending hours in the shower, scrubbing your skin until you bleed because you can't wash the filth away and you keep feeling dirty no matter how much you clean yourself. "Just" waking up at night, after having relived the scene again in a nightmare. "Just" looking over your shoulder wherever you walk because you heard something or thought you saw something or simply because someone is walking behind you. "Just" the fact that you'll never feel comfortable walking alone at night again or have someone walk behind you. "Just" never being able to relax because your body constantly think you're in grave danger. "Just" a rape…

That's such a neck-beard thing to say. Someone who clearly think of other people's bodies as property or things. Not taking into consideration that we are living, breathing individuals with feelings. And that having another person violate us isn't something we like or that we'll easily get over. We want to choose who we give ourselves to, nobody should be forced. We didn't ask to be raped. We didn't want it. We didn't like it.

Rape is trauma.

Yes, we should have chosen other characters for the story, but we did what we did, and it cannot be undone now. So, if the only thing I will be remembered for in the fandom is that ONE fic, instead of all my other content, that's what it will be. That's what people chose to. I'm moving on.

10. Being a nazi for being interested in WW2 history and for being Norwegian and having so-called nazi-letters in my last name (actual letters of the Norwegian alphabet).

*sigh*

This is something that could only happen in America, isn't it?

Some people don't bother educating themselves. The "nazi-letters" you guys are talking about is actually part of the Norwegian alphabet and has nothing to do with Nazism or white-supremacy to do at all. The Norwegian alphabet has 29 letters, the three extra is æ,ø,å or in capital letters: Æ,Ø,Å.

We can't help it if some morons over in the US abuse these letters as symbol of their twisted mindset.

Yes, my name contains one of those letters. It is my name… and I didn't choose it. It is a common Norwegian name.

As for me being a Nazi?

Those who knows me knows that I am as far from a Nazi as one can get. I despise Nazism with all my heart.

But the reason some people choose to believe so… was that some guy who has no hobbies or life went through every single fave I've made on DeviantArt since I joined the site in 2006, which is well over 20000 faves. And he found a few Nazi-characters from a web series I was following about ten years ago. I am very interested in history and especially WW2-history, so I found that particular web-series interesting and faved some artwork related to it. What this guy failed to notice is that I also faved the Allied characters… That's ALL there is to that story.

I has also faved a pic someone made of Joseph Goebbels (I think it was?) as a Pixar Car. That's not because I have any nazi-sympathies, but I simply found the concept of turning historical persons, both good and bad, into Cars as an interesting project. I would have faved any other historical Carsified person as well.

As for me being a Norwegian and have a natural pale complexion, that's not something I can help. That's nothing I choose. And it doesn't make me racist or Nazi. Period.

11. Putting a white-supremacist flag (the actual flag of Norway) on my porch on family birthdays and our national day.

Again. Get educated.

This flag… is the actual flag of my country. The Kingdom of Norway.

There is nothing Nazi about it. It is not a symbol of white-supremacy. IT IS THE FLAG OF NORWAY.

During WW2 it was even illegal, so people would paint it everywhere in a protest against the Nazi-occpation and the SS. We even decorated our Christmas trees with it, and that is a tradition that has followed us into the modern day.

Again, if some idiots in the US choose to use it as a symbol for their disgusting logic, it is not Norway or the Norwegians' fault.

12. Being a danger to my daughter.

I need people to elaborate here.

What exactly do you think I do to my daughter? What is the cause of your concern here?

The fact that I have made NSFW content? How is that harmful to her as long as I keep it away from her? You DO realize that even authors, pornstars and moviemakers have children and that they can be good parents, right?

Do you think I read pornographic content for her as bedtime stories? Or show her porn instead of kids TV? How sick are you guys, really…?

Some people even wanted CPS to take my child away from me… Have a look at these screenshots…

You want a happy, healthy, innocent child to be taken away from a stable, safe home with loving parents just because you don't like the content the mother made? You want her to be placed in foster care, where there is no guarantee that she will have a happy upbringing rather than have her stay with her parents who love her and care for her, for reasons she'll never understand and wasn't even aware of?

"Think of the children!" a lot of you say when it comes to my content. May I ask why this doesn't apply to my daughter?

Why do some of you go as far as to wishing her dead or wanting her to be removed from the home she feels safe and loved in? How is that thinking of the children?

As for the douchebag in that screenshot. You claim that if your mother did something like that you would want nothing to do with her… I have a question: Do you know EVERYTHING your mother do? Does she include you in each aspect of her life? Even her sexual life? No?

How do you know she doesn't do thing you don't approve of when you're not around? She could be a rabid pornmag reader for all you know. But stuff like that is something adults hide from their kids. So, you wouldn't know, unless you go snooping around in her business.

Everyone is entitled to privacy. What I and my husband do when our kid is not around is our business, not hers, and certainly not yours.

Porn and parenting are to be kept separate from each other. Period.

And we do.

There is absolutely no reason to be worried about my daughter. She is a happy, healthy child in a safe, stable home with family that loves her and cares for her. Not just me and my husband, but also grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins.

If you want to remove her from that over a stupid fanfic behind a mature content wall, you're the deranged person, not me.

This is all I have to say about all this and my time in the TTTE fandom. I have left by my own, free will. Yes, I am aware that many people don't want me there. That's fine. I don't want to be there.

I am a bit disappointed in those people who just blindly unfollowed me and unfriended me without any questions asked, just followed the leader. Big users tend to dictate who and what is worth following in that fandom. They will even protect real predators, but I'm not going to open that can of worms now. I'm done with the fandom.

Some of those people, I have been talking to regularly, even supported when they faced hardships in the fandom themselves. But when I got in trouble, they ditched me without a word…

If anything, this whole ordeal showed me who to trust and not, and who were true to their word when it came to how deep our friendship was. True friends at least give you the chance to explain before they drop you. I hold no ill feelings to those who did, at least they asked me before judging.

And those who still stayed with me, are the ones who truly know me and who I really am.

Some of the worst libels posted about me might be reported to the police, but I haven't made up my mind yet. I am not mentally strong at the moment, so I don't know if I have the strength to legally follow it all up. I will ask the cops at work for advice on the matter.

All I ask for now is some peace.

You don't have to like me. You don't have to follow me. You don't have to like my content. Feel free to invalidate me, I know a lot of you will.

But please, stop bullying me and my family.

Please stop sending me horrid messages and death threats.

Please stop doxxing me and calling me.

Please leave my family alone. If you don't care about me, at least care about them.

Please just ignore me. I have already left the fandom, there is no reason to keep hunting me.

I just want to move on and go on with my life and the content I am currently working on. After years in therapy, my life has gotten better, and I want to move on.

Please let me.

#good bye to ttte #tw//suicide #tw//rape #tw// bullying #tw//depression #tw//ptsd #tw//ttte #tw//sex #tw//abuse #tw//domestic abuse #I'm done

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traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors · 3 years

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Hey im the anon with the abusive mom who was struggling with no contact. Thank you for your response, it does help a lot. I didnt know low contact was a thing amd thats definitely easing my mind.

Actually I’m writing for a different reason. Little context, my father has NPD—diagnosable (has he ever accepted that because he has to admit hes less than perfect? No but its there anyway). So my thing is, I’ve read your thing on calling someone a narcissist. And honestly? People can be narcissists and the people around them can experince narcissistic abuse without an NPD diagnosis. I grew up with mental illness, mental disorders, personality disorders. My family is a psychiatrists dream, since all of us suffer from something or other.

Please understand I’m not trying to cause trouble, or invalidate that post. I do understand it, I understand it better than most. And I respect you for trying to be as inclusive as possible. People who suffer fromNPD deserve the same love and respect that everyone else does. But… I wonder how you approach those who have experienced narcissistic abuse. The word narcissist existed long before the diagnosis, as you say, and a person who is self absorbed or manipulative is not a narcissist. As far as most modern psychology is concerned, a narcissist and someone with NPD are two separate things. Its not their fault that they didnt get a new word like bipolar, schizophrenia, and even autism did.

So really- my question is, how do you balance the two? How do you balance recigbizibg that NPD deserves respect amd fair treatment while still recognizing that people can be hurt, and hurt badly, by narcissistic abuse which may have nothing to do with NPD? Forgive me if I sound mean in this, I often come off too strong for normal people, sorry.

Hey anon,

Thank you for writing in! I’m really glad we were able to help, and I appreciate you asking this--it’s an entirely valid question.

Both my father and my brother (my two abusers) are self-centered in the way you’re describing, and my father also does have NPD, so I fully understand where you’re coming from. It can be a tough question.

I’m able to balance it, personally, by using a different word for the abuse you’re describing. The ways I was abused were self-centered, selfish, and manipulative. A lot of words were once used as insults before being widely recognized as something that shouldn’t be insulting, and what we’re trying to do is spread awareness that NPD isn’t an insult, nor should it be considered inherently bad. People with NPD definitely can be abusive, and I’m not trying to invalidate anyone who has been abused by someone with it! But not all people with NPD are abusers, and making those people feel welcomed rather than demonized is very important to me and all of the other mods.

I would encourage you to use synonyms that don’t have the same connotations as “narcissistic”--something that isn’t inherently tied to a personality disorder. I truly do believe it’s worth it.

I hope this makes sense, and I’m truly apologetic if I at any point came across as angry or defensive. This was never my intent; I understand that you’re asking a genuine question, and I hope I was able to answer accordingly. Please know nothing I said was meant to be defensive or invalidating to you and your trauma.

Stay safe,

Mod Henrie

Also--we got your ask with the tiktok link. I finished answering this before it was sent in and waited to post it until some of the other mods could look it over, but I think this answer works for both anyway? And please don’t worry, you didn’t come across as rude or aggressive or anything like that! This is a conversation where we’re discussing two differing views, and you’ve done so very respectfully, and I truly appreciate that.

I’m going to delete the other ask you sent in--I did watch the video, and while I do think it does a good job of illustrating the differences between the two, I still believe it’s better to use a synonym. I’m deleting it only because I feel that answering it would be redundant, and I really do appreciate you sending it in 💚

#mod henrie #ask #answered #anon #trauma talks

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supportivespaceforsurvivors · 3 years

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To the anon whose family was initially supportive of their trauma but now brushes it off and thinks you should have “gotten over it by now”: unfortunately your answered ask was deleted with the other posts, but I read asks on my phone, type an answer on my laptop, and email that to myself to answer on my phone, so I do have your answer saved. I’m going to repost it in case you didn’t get to see it/it might help someone else.

Hey anon,

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It’s always incredibly frustrating and invalidating when people refuse to give you the time and resources you need to heal, especially if it’s because they think you should already “be over it”. It takes huge amounts of time to overcome trauma, and it’s often a lifelong process, and you deserve to have this acknowledged and respected.

I don’t know quite what your relationship with your parents is like. If it’s generally a mutually respectful and trusting one, I’d recommend clearly explaining to them why you’re still affected by your trauma, how it makes you feel when they invalidate you, and what you wish they’d do to help you (examples would be taking you to a therapist, accepting that you’re going to be affected by it and giving you the space for this, avoiding things that might trigger you, etc.). I was in a similar position to you (though it wasn’t with my trauma), and eventually I got myself worked up and sent my mother a text explaining why what she was doing was so invalidating and how that hurt me. If you have a strong relationship with one/both of your parents, it definitely could work, even if the prospect seems terrifying (if you do this, I would recommend doing it in writing, so you can get your entire perspective across without being interrupted).

If this isn’t an option for you, I would suggest telling a trusted adult at your school. In the United States (I’m not sure about other countries), all teachers and school administration are mandatory reporters, meaning they’re required by law to report confirmed or suspected abuse or neglect. What your parents are doing does not legally count as neglect (that doesn’t mean it isn’t neglectful or harmful behavior, however), and from the research I’ve done I don’t believe Child Protective Services would have enough evidence of suspected neglect or abuse to do an investigation, but it’s still something you should be aware of going into this. In my experience, teachers do what they do because they genuinely want to help their students, and they may be willing to contact your parents separately about the issue. I did once have a friend whose parents refused to allow them on medication, and they told a teacher they trusted--I don’t know exactly what happened, but they were on the medication about a month later, so I do know it can work. Your school’s counselor is also a good person to tell, if you don’t trust any of your teachers. Counselors often have resources that teachers don’t, and they’ll be able to work with you to come up with a more individualized plan. You don’t have to feel bad about telling any of these people: they’re getting paid to help you, and you’re allowed to ask for it.

Another option is to call or text a mental health hotline. Whoever you talked to would also be able to link you to local and regional resources that we can’t, and they’d be able to offer you more personalized help. You might also want to call your doctor’s office and ask about their mental health treatment programs. In the United States, once you reach a certain age (it varies among states, but I believe it’s usually around 15), your doctors are legally required to keep your treatments and records confidential from your parents unless you sign a release of information form. I don’t know what the laws for this are in other countries, however.

Ultimately, anon, I believe your two options are either to convince your parents that you need to see a therapist in order to heal your trauma or do your best to get equivalent care yourself. Both of these are daunting tasks, and I wish you all the best. Feel free to send in another ask if there’s anything else we can do to help.

Stay safe,

Mod Henrie

#mod henrie #ask #answered #trauma #anon

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no-whump-on-main · 4 years

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My Experiences and Safety Concerns on the Whumper Gathering and Niji Discord Servers

A content warning for this post: I am discussing a real case involving sexualization of a minor and predatory behavior by an adult. Please proceed with caution if you are sensitive to these issues. I remain as vague as I can be throughout the post while still accurately describing what happened and capturing the gravity of the situation.

I want to start this out by saying I hate cancel culture. I hate it, I hate witch hunts, I hate call out posts, I hate bitching about people on the internet for no good reason.

But I draw the line when there is a reason. I draw the line where other people, especially minors, are legitimately at risk.

There have been many posts on the topic of the Whumper Gathering server. Two that explain the situation well are this one and this one. I won’t pick the server itself apart piece by piece here, as I only intend on sharing my own experience there and why I am so concerned for everyone still in the server, and for those who interact with its’ owner, Yume.

I first joined the Whumper Gathering server in November of 2019. Back then, it was a welcoming place, serving as a hub of roleplay and character discussion. There were a few bumps along the road, but they were routine server issues that Yume handled delicately. Everything was fine. I made close friends there.

The issues involving me began around the end of January. Yume approached me on the 31st asking if I’d like to be a moderator of the server. I accepted quickly, overjoyed to be a bigger part of the community that I loved so much.

Unfortunately, that conversation was when everything started to go downhill. The first instance where I felt incredibly unnerved by Yume’s behavior toward me was when she asked this incredibly off-handed question right after I agreed to be a moderator:

I am a minor. At the time that this conversation occurred, I was thirteen. Yume was completely aware of this, she knew it from my introduction in the server, yet she still somehow considered it appropriate to ask me a question with romantic implications.

I was extremely confused and taken aback in the moment. I just laughed it off because I didn’t know what else to do.

Yume’s conduct toward me did not stop or change after that. If anything, it worsened. After I made one joke in the server implying that I wanted to go to college to be a trophy wife, she gripped onto the name for months, and called me HER trophy wife hundreds of times despite the original joke having nothing to do with her. I was too afraid to call her out on how inappropriate it was for her to talk to me like that when she was an adult and I was, by every definition, a child. I tried to drop hints that I was uncomfortable, and while it isn’t her fault for not being able to read between my lines, even when I did finally gain the courage to flat out say I was uncomfortable, she completely brushed me off. A few examples of this behavior are below, the last being her excusing her behavior after I finally told her I didn’t want to be called her trophy wife. *Please note that the names and profile pictures of others involved in the conversations have been crossed out, because they did not consent to being involved with this post in any way, and did not do anything wrong.

These are just a FEW examples. Again, I don’t want this to be a witch hunt, so I am only providing necessary examples and not leaving unnecessary screenshots to gawk at. Also, there is a 10 image limit per post and I’m trying to fit everything.

More rather disturbing screenshots that go further than the “trophy wife” deal:

The first: Completely unpromtedly implying/saying that she wanted to cuddle with me, at the time a 13 year old. I just wanted to talk about bringing my blanket to school.

The second: Calling me the “titty police” and going on to talk about me in relation to breasts further.

This is just what happened in public chats.

One of the scariest instances of her conduct toward me happened in a moderator chat. I do not have any screenshot evidence for this, because Yume deleted the entire moderator chat after people began to call her out for her behaviors, but I do have the word of the other former moderators who witnessed this happen.

Soon after I was appointed as a moderator, we had a situation with a user making inappropriate sexual comments/requests in our roleplay channels. This person by all means could’ve been considered a predator. Yume quickly decided that this person needed to be addressed. There were 3 adult moderators at the time, as well as myself and another minor moderator. We all banded together to figure out a message to send to this person as an immediate warning to stop their behaviors.

Everything went well until it came to who had to send the message. By now, only Yume and Kekune, Yume’s best friend, were online, along with myself. Yume immediately said that her anxiety was too bad to send it, and said it wasn’t a possibility. Kekune also counted herself out on the grounds of simply not wanting to. That left me, a minor, to go privately DM an adult who was breaking rules in an NSFW manner. I was clearly uncomfortable with the situation, but was pressured into it by both Yume and Kekune and guilted about Yume’s anxiety until I gave in.

Later into my time as a staff member, when I was a promoted to a co-admin, Yume refused to turn off the “administrator” permission for my role. This meant that I could see all of the server’s NSFW channels. I immediately muted and collapsed them, and told her that I was uncomfortable even being able to view them, but she refused to change the permission for weeks because she preferred to just click administrator and it was anxiety inducing for her to do the permissions individually.

Yume has also engaged in multiple explicit NSFW roleplays in main roleplay chats and refused to move them to a section where minors could not view them, but I will not elaborate because though I was there and witnessed it, it was not a personal matter to me.

After I finally left the server in July, Yume proceeded to gossip about me privately with other adults and spread misinformation to the members in her server. I have had multiple adult acquaintances tell me they had to shut Yume down from ranting about me to them on many occasions, and rationally, I can assume there’s many more people Yume talked to about me who did not tell me. Below is a screenshot of Yume spreading blatant misinformation about me in the main chat of Whumper Gathering, saying I sent her hate anons when I could not have possibly done so, since she blocked me.

Again, I want to reiterate this is the surface level of things. There have been many, many more instances of Yume behaving inappropriately toward me or speaking about me in an inappropriate way.

What makes this worse is Yume and some members of her new staff team’s responses.

Yume adamantly denies any wrongdoing and mongers people around her to agree with her by guilting them with her anxiety, triggers, and sex repulsion. She repeatedly tries to use her asexuality to excuse her actions, or to say that she couldn’t possibly be a predator because of her trauma. She denies every aspect of this situation and blames me.

She blatantly lies about stopping calling me her trophy wife, as the nickname usage did not stop until I left the server and had no further contact with her. She also completely makes up me implying all asexual people are predators. That never happened. She calls my statements contradictory and tries to explain away her actions, taking no personal responsibility for the situation. She tries to use her sex repulsion as an excuse, and does not own up to being at fault for any part of the situation.

This is just one of her many, many “apologies”/public statements.

I rejoined both Whumper Gathering and Niji in July with the intention of shedding light on how dangerous of a person Yume was. Niji was originally an RWBY fandom project, but quickly devolved into Yume’s side server and personal venting space.

I was met with the support of many members, both in Niji and Whumper Gathering, but Yume’s new mod team (not any of the mods I worked with, there was a mass walk out shortly before I rejoined; this is a newly hired set) had some particularly disgusting responses to me. I was attacked, called a liar, and demeaned, particularly by Kekune. Kekune, who is also an adult, said extremely nasty things to me and completely defended Yume and her actions while also flat out attacking me. She blamed me for everything in relation to Yume while trying to garner support from other server members.

As you can see, Kekune not only excuses Yume’s behavior, but lies about the facts of the situation, and blames me, the literal child in the situation, for every aspect and states that I should‘ve prevented myself from being sexualized by an adult. “She didn’t mean it like that” is just one of many excuses made during this conversation.

This entire situation has been extremely emotionally and physically exhausting for me. I’ve put off making this post out of fear of backlash, but at this point, I am more concerned about general and minor safety of the whump community than about whatever hate I may receive. There are many, many other horrible behaviors and things Yume has done in the WG and Niji servers; these are just my own personal experiences, as I think the posts I linked above do plenty of explaining, and I don’t need to beat a dead horse.

My message and point with sharing this is simple. Do Not Interact, particularly if you are a minor. If you are still in WG or Niji, leave. Yume is a dangerous individual, as are many of her mods.

Yume has over a hundred side blogs. The ones I know she uses most are @/whump-dream and @/midian-alexandra. I urge EVERYONE, particularly minors, not to interact with her or either of her servers. It is not safe. You could end up gaslit, manipulated, and/or verbally abused. It’s not worth being there for entertainment or to “watch the drama.”

All of the above words are mine and mine only. No one else edited this, or even saw it before I posted it publicly. You are welcome to reblog for signal boost if you’d like, but I ask that you please do not add any comments and message me privately with any concerns, because I do not want this to turn into a witch hunt or a flame war against Yume or her staff, and again, this post is 100% from me. Please be safe, friends. The whump community is meant to be safe and welcoming and individuals like this prevent that from being the case.

-Sara (nowhumponmain)

#whump #whump community #whumper gathering #whumper gathering server #psa

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destielfanfic · 4 years

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Group Ask #180

Relevant links to find lost fic

previous group asks - feel free to browse them!

spnstoryfinders

Guide to Finding Fic

Guide to Finding Lost Fic

PSA - Save Your Faves!

Also, please check out our Tags Page and see if the fic in question could be found under some plot/ trope/ pairing related tags! And big thanks to all followers who do check out tags before sending in the ask!!! <333

Ask # ( @sarahrosestinkytoes): there’s this fic…#1

Hi! I was wondering if you could help me find a fic? Dean is hunting solo and is partnered up with Hunter!cas by Ellen to do a hunt together. All I can really remember is that Sam is at college and John is upset with Dean about something so that's why they aren't together, but they do eventually all meet up together and John doesn't trust cas at all. Ive searched through a few tags like Hunter!cas and tried googling, but I can't seem to turn anything up. Thanks in advance if you can help!

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - #solo hunter!dean and #hunter!cas

suggested by @charie-caphine: We Built Our Own World by melonbutterfly. although it is Mary not John who survived.

Ask # ( @wondermatjk ): there’s this fic…#2

hi i was wondering if anyone would know a fic where castiel moves into a new house and has a dog anna who is a shifter and she gets together with dean who's also a shifter before dying and then dean starts living with cas till they eventually fall in love i also remember a scene where gabriel arrives for thanksgiving and cas runs into the woods to find dean after a disagreement i've been searching for this fic forever and can't find it :/

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - #creature!dean (for shifter Dean fics)

Found by anon: Dire by LeoArcana (first fic in Dire verse) [NC-17, 166,800 word count, 189,300 word count for all verse] Castiel moved out to the wide open and sparsely populated plains of Montana for a more private life. He's not much of a people person, his only company has been his brother, Gabriel and his dog, Anna. But no one ever told him wolves inhabited this part of Montana. Well, that's because they don't. And as he finds out later, they aren't wolves either.

Ask # ( @writerrsj ): there’s this fic…#3

I've been binge reading Destiel fanfic on AO3 and neglected to save one I enjoyed. It was one where Cas had to use Dean as a vessel in order to live (I believe they left his body behind - Mary and Sam were there. Mary was against Cas.). Now, I can't find it again despite repeated searches. Any advice (please)? 🙏🙏

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - #vessels

Ask # ( @reagansawake-blog ): there’s this fic…#4

I'm looking for a destiel fic that contains a moment involving Sam, who has a developing attraction to a female character, but is holding back because of all the tragedy of Sam's past doomed relationships. Sam lists all the people he's been involved with who are now dead, and includes Gabriel on that list. When the person he's talking to is surprised, Sam says something like "what, dean's the only who gets to like dick?" They had talked, but Gabriel died before they could act on it. Thanks! :D

Ask # ( @queen-of-hell-666) there’s this fic…#5

Hi, I'm looking for a fic where Cas and Dean meet in a bar and are in a sort of relationship que then Dean forgets his jacket in Cas' place and finds Cas cheating on him with Meg. After that he starts a relationship with a guy and he happens to bring Dean to the bar where Meg and Cas work and Cas gets jealous. That's all I remember. Please help me find it 🙏

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - #megstiel

Ask # ( @painnnn-thats-it ): there’s this fic…#6

Hi there! I was wondering if you knew of this one fic. It's been a while since I read it and I've been looking everywhere. I think it was a fake relationship but the only thing I really remember is this one scene where they visit Cas or Dean's house, I think it was Cas's, and his family is really uptight and mean and one of the family members is really mean to them and Dean gives Cas a blow job in the closet as a thank you for standing up for him. Thanks!!

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - #pretend boyfriends

Found by @starlightthroughbrokenglass: (Dis) Affection by justkeeponwriting

Ask # ( @blazeeblake ): there’s this fic…#7

(1/2) I'm sorry if I'm not doing this right, or didn't look hard enough, but I've had zero luck finding this one. From what I remember, Dean is a camboy who started cam-ing to take back his power after an exploitive realtionship with Alastair; he also works at a strip club. Castiel is an uptight business man who meets Dean at the strip club during a bachelor (?) party. At first they hate each other but after Dean ['s cat] sends Cas an accidental friend request they start to bond... 2/2 Other things I think I remember: Sam is paired with Jess; Anna is Cas's assistant; Dean gets hit by a car at one point (he survives and doesn't get any life changing injuries but it further bonds him and Cas); Balthazar and Gabriel are in the story. I also remember it was not completed and I'm worried this has been deleted and is gone forever, but i figured if it could be found at all, here was the place for a hail Mary. Thanks in advance & again sorry if I did this wrong.

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - #pornstar!dean, #stripper!dean, #!deanalastair

Ask # ( @hardlywaiting ): there’s this fic…#8

I’ve been desperately looking for an ABO fic with young omega cas and alpha dean. Sam and Jess bought Cas to help Dean through a funk and he spends a lot of time cleaning the house. Dean doesn’t treat Castiel the way he’s supposed to and at one point Castiel ends up running away and finds a beta meg. By the end of the fic dean’s house has become a sort of safe house for omegas.

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - alpha/beta/omega dynamics /knotting

Ask # ( @deanismypatronass ): there’s this fic…#9

I'm trying to remember a fic I read years ago, based on the viral video where someone is playing the piano at a train station and a stranger starts playing with him. Cas is a famous pianist and after they go viral they end up keeping in touch long distance, eventually Cas sends dean tickets to come see his concerto. I searched all of your music tags but it wasn't there, maybe one of your followers will remember it? Thanks!

Relevant tags from our Tags Page - #music

Found by @mittensmorgul : A Song For Four Hands by Winglesss [T, 3,200 word count] While waiting for his flight, Dean sits down at one of the public pianos. A stranger joins him and they play a beautiful duet. Later, Dean finds out that Castiel Novak is a professional musician and decides to contact him.

Just a reminder - we still accept lost fic ask, and when we know the fic we answer fast and privately. When mods don’t know the fic, we collect them in Group Asks and post when there’s enough or when mods have time to deal with them. Sorry about the long wait, but that’s how it is,

#group asks #asks #there's this fic #there's this fic...#sorry about late posting!#but i am around now to add fics if you know the right one

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shadowofthelamp · 4 years

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Fandom Trades: Tips and Tricks

I’ve been running a secret santa for five years now, and a few people expressed interest in a sort of ‘guide’. It does take some elbow grease to get things up and running, but it’s very rewarding and gets easier as you go. Click the ‘read more’ for some stuff I’ve picked up over the years! It’s a bit general to try and cover anything, but if you have any questions, you can ask! (And if you’ve run one yourself, feel free to add on!)

FAQ: Something that’s a really good idea to have. Here’s the most important stuff on it that would probably be applicable to most trades:

-Basic summary of what the trade will be- some could be fic-only or art-only, or even specific-ship-only. Mine’s general to ‘all sonic sfw content’, but setting guidelines so people know what they’re getting into is a good idea so you won’t have to answer the same question over and over.

-Deadlines. Make them clear. Mine’s easy (Christmas Eve) but depending on what size the gift is expected to be, the time frame can be adjusted.

-Related, set up rules for if people need to drop out. It happens, so be prepared. (This is why I ask now if people are alright giving a second gift.)

-Any particular rules for your trade- is it sfw or is nsfw acceptable? (In that case, set age limits.) Are there ships that will or won’t be allowed? Is there a punishment for violating the rules or turning things in late, like not being allowed to participate in the trade again?

PROMOTION:

A promo image is a good idea! I’ve been using the same one for a few years that was put together by a friend no longer on tumblr, but images catch people’s eyes faster than a text dump. Make something that’s easy to understand but gets the point across, and the text below should have enough information without overwhelming the casual scroller.

Space paragraphs often to make it less intimidating. Include links to the FAQ, the sample entry, and the submit box right in the post, as well as a way to contact you- you want things to be as easy as possible for anyone interested. Here’s my promo post.

You also want to start promotion early- I start posting and reblogging my promo a full month before the entry deadline, to give as many people the chance to see it as possible. Any earlier, and they might not care- (who wants to see a Christmas trade post in October when you’re hyped for Halloween?) and any later and you might not get as many participants as you could have. A month-ish is a good time frame. (I also have a tag for the promo post, so people can blacklist it if they aren’t interested and don’t want to see it 15 times.)

SAMPLE ENTRIES:

Also something that’s good to have. Having a template for what you want entries to look like will make sorting easier for you. Here’s mine. It’s a good idea to scout around for other trades to find out what would work for you.

MAKING ASSIGNMENTS:

Next, setting up how to arrange who gets assigned to who. I personally use google spreadsheets. These are the categories I use, feel free to steal them: Username, medium (art, writing, amvs, ect), whether they’ll work with fan characters, what they’d like to receive, what they won’t do (one year I even added ‘if there’s anyone you won’t work with’ so if it’s a fandom with drama, that one might be good), who they’re gifting to, who they’re receiving from, if they’ve submitted their piece yet, if their piece is in the queue, and if they’re alright with doing backup.

I also had a category for if they’ve confirmed they’re still in once assignments were sent out. (Boy, was that one nerve-wracking during the whole tumblr purge debacle of last year- I didn’t know if anybody had just quit tumblr mid-month.)

You will run into people who only want two or three things nobody else wrote on their sheet. If you can’t find even one match, then just put them with someone who had a wide variety on theirs, or who doesn’t have anything on their ‘won’t do’ list. Trying to match with multiple likes is a better bet, though, so encouraging longer lists of what people want makes things easier for you in the long run!

I personally just went in a line- I picked one person, found who they would give a gift to, and then found who THAT person would give a gift to. Rinse and repeat down the list, and it’ll end with everyone paired. I ended up making a closed loop and then sorting the last 8 or so, which was fine. An easy way to check that you didn’t double-classify anyone is control-f and searching names. If their name pops up 3 times, you did it right.

SENDING OUT ASSIGNMENTS:

Just copy-pasting the part of the entry that includes the person’s name and their likes makes this way easier for you over trying to type them out individually. Ask for confirmation that people got their assignments so you don’t have to worry if they missed it.

HOW TO KEEP THINGS ORGANIZED:

My system is this: I’ve mentioned it before, but I utilize a combination of my spreadsheet and the queue function. Let’s say Sally’s making a gift for Jake, Jake’s making a gift for Taylor, and Taylor’s making a gift for Sally. Sally submits her piece of art for Jake. I mark that off on the sheet, so when Taylor submits the gift for Sally, that gift will go in the queue to be posted whenever the deadline is up because she turned hers in already.

This keeps people motivated to complete their parts of the trade, since they won’t get their gifts until they do. If someone drops out, tell the person making the gift for them- if you’re lucky, they can rework what they have for the person that the drop-out was supposed to make something for, but if not, bring in someone who didn’t mind making a second gift. Person making the gift for the dropout can choose if they want to continue making it or not- if it’s mostly done and not a fan-character, they can just post it on their own blog unrelated to the trade.

It’s also a good idea to have a ‘hub’ where things are posted. If it’s a fic trade, ao3 has a function specifically for this, but I’ve found having things submitted directly to you makes it a million times easier to keep track of who’s finished their pieces, as well as keeping things ‘secret’ until the big day. (People have gotten confused or excited and posted early before.)

If people want to post elsewhere after it’s posted on the main hub, set your own rules- I say it’s fine as long as it links back to the blog and links the giftee, particularly if it involves fancharacters. You make your own judgement.

BE PATIENT:

This is one that’s very important. Some people don’t check the FAQ, and some people are going to be new, asking questions that you swear you’ve answered before or thought would be obvious. They generally just want to know, so take a deep breath. They don’t know they’re the fifth person to ask that question. Answer politely, or steer them towards the FAQ. (Running the same event year after year, you run into this a lot- they’re just new, be nice!)

Don’t start an event that you expect to have plenty of people participating if you aren’t prepared to hear the same questions a couple of times. Things might get a little annoying- take a step back for a few minutes, cool off, but try to remain professional. You signed up for this. For me, it’s always worth it to see how happy people are about their gifts, but know yourself and your limits- running a themed week where people post art at their own pace is less hassle, so you could try that if you don’t feel up to organizing a full trade!

If you can have a friend to bounce things off of, that can help too, but don’t use them as just a dumping ground. Tumblr allows multiple ‘mods’ on a blogs, so splitting work can make things easier, particularly if it’s your first run doing something like this. I had a friend who helped me the first few years before leaving tumblr. Be sure you trust the person, though! They’ll be able to edit posts and delete submissions, so if any drama happens, beware. (This never happened to me, but it doesn’t hurt to be careful.)

TAGGING:

Add tags to the submission box. I don’t know why this took me four years to think of, but it saved me a lot of time last year. If it’s a trade that covers an entire fandom and dozens of ships, you can add the shipping tags as they come in, but adding the ten or so most popular character tags helps a lot. If it’s going to involve potentially triggering content, common trigger tags are a good idea too. (A Halloween trade might need this, for example, or one that involves nsfw content.)

PEOPLE TURNING THINGS IN LAST MINUTE:

It’s going to happen. I think one year I was panicking on the 23rd because I only had half the gifts, and all but one had been turned in by the time I went to bed on the 24th. People procrastinate- if you get in most of the gifts ahead of time, you can thank your lucky stars. Try not to stress over it, but feel free to post reminders in the week before/days leading up to the deadline. My family travels around the holidays a lot, and I managed to get everything queued up properly through airport and hotel wifi more than one year, so you’ll be just fine if you try and stay calm.

OTHER/GENERAL:

It’s absolutely worth it, in my opinion- I’ve been doing this for years for a reason. My favorite thing is knowing I’ve done something that made others happy. Going through all the excited responses Christmas morning is equal or above getting presents from my family, because I know it’s on some level because of me facilitating the trade in the first place. I hear over and over this is something people look forward to, and it genuinely warms my heart.

It might take a few years to get established, but if you find a niche (there was a blog called sonic secret santa, but it hadn’t been updated in years) you might be surprised how fast you can gather people! I like seeing people show up year after year, it’s how I know I’m doing something right.

It is definitely work, and there is stress involved, (especially if people drop out or don’t send in their gifts on time) but the benefits outweigh the negatives, I say. People are generally understanding if there’s a problem, as long as you make it known you’re working on it.

You have to commit to the responsibility if you do this- people who are making gifts are putting their trust in you that you’ll keep things organized and they’ll get something for the gift they’re giving. You can’t guarantee everything will run exactly as planned, but you can be as transparent as possible when you hit a bump- ‘I’m sorry, but your person said they’ll be late because they were having internet problems/personal life issues and is doing their best’ is going to get a lot better of a response than radio silence. Be sympathetic, but be firm on the rules if need be.

I hope this helped a bit, and thanks for reading!

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